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Speaker 1: Hey, we had a few comments about your swearing in

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Speaker 1: the last episode.

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Speaker 2: Did you see that I haven't seen that? Is it

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Speaker 2: our ageous?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? It's huge, like canashtop swearing?

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Speaker 2: Seriously, what buck off?

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Speaker 1: I'm just joking. Welcome back to Two Dads. I am

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Speaker 1: Mattie Jay and I'm as. This is a podcast that

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Speaker 1: is all about parenting, the good, the bad, and relatable.

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Speaker 1: And look, if there are any new listeners right now

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Speaker 1: have just tuned in. Maybe they've seen our faces on

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Speaker 1: the artwork of the podcast and thought, hey, they look

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Speaker 1: like they could offer some advice. I think if you

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Speaker 1: come here for advice, it'd be like someone entering a

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Speaker 1: chili eating contests.

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Speaker 2: Actually, that's a lie. Someone took my advice the other day.

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Speaker 2: They even sent me a message to say I forgot

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Speaker 2: to tell you.

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Speaker 1: Actually, now, look at the smile on your face.

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Speaker 2: I'm an expert. Which part don't talk in the middle

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Speaker 2: of the night. Did you see that I have been

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Speaker 2: a message?

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Speaker 1: I think I saw a message from.

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Speaker 2: A ready my dam.

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Speaker 1: From a mum.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, she was like genius, didn't even think about it.

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Speaker 2: So like, why do you need to talk in the

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Speaker 2: middle of night? You don't need to talk. If she goes,

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Speaker 2: can you get me some water?

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Speaker 1: Just do it? Just there is the odd look. You know.

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Speaker 1: Obviously we like to talk ourselves down too much. Because

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Speaker 1: there are a lot of other podcasts out there that.

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Speaker 2: Do offer gen we don't focus on it.

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Speaker 1: No, if there is advice, it's purely accidental.

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Speaker 2: Absolutely, that was an accident. That was me kind of

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Speaker 2: being like that what worked for me could work for you.

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Speaker 2: But I also I just don't want to see people

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Speaker 2: getting in an argument in the middle of the night, especially

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Speaker 2: if they are your neighbors, thinking your neighbors.

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Speaker 1: If there's one thing that we can do, Ash, I

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Speaker 1: hope we can do, it's just bring couples together and

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Speaker 1: try and minimize any arguments that they have around the kids.

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Speaker 2: And build some normality before we start.

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Speaker 1: Yes, it would be remiss of us not to crack

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Speaker 1: a little bit.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Absolutely, what have we got today?

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Speaker 1: Well, this is something different.

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Speaker 2: I've had this before, you've had I had a couple

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Speaker 2: last night, Ash at all.

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Speaker 1: Oh Yeah, cheers your ginger beer people.

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Speaker 2: Of the equipment, because that's expensive.

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Speaker 1: Better be a ginger beer, Ash, fact, if I may,

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Speaker 1: this has half the sugar of other ginger beers out

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Speaker 1: there that are alcoholic.

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Speaker 2: All right, and like you know me, I'm a beer

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Speaker 2: guy all the all the day long. I couldn't get

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Speaker 2: that out. I'm a big guy through and through. I

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Speaker 2: don't drink any spirits rarely unless I'm absolutely hammered.

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Speaker 1: What made you go for the ginger beer yesterday? Oh?

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Speaker 2: I thought, like, I haven't had a chance to try

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Speaker 2: it yet. We're going to talk about it today real quick,

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Speaker 2: and I thought, you know what, I'm gonna have six

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Speaker 2: of them. So I had a few of them last

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Speaker 2: year and I quite like them. They're definitely in the rotation.

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Speaker 1: Normally i'd have this on a summer afternoon. Winter still

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Speaker 1: quite nice.

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Speaker 2: Winter's got a gingery beer feel about it too.

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Speaker 1: It's kind of like I think if you're in the UK,

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Speaker 1: like mulled wine. Yeah, yeah, it is big and the

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Speaker 1: Australian equivalent ginger beer.

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Speaker 2: Do you know what I did? It was late yester afternoon.

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Speaker 2: I had the kids. I locked them in the trampoline

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Speaker 2: out there as you do perfect ziparp, but I put

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Speaker 2: a padlock with man. Just went out there and just

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Speaker 2: watched them UFC wrestle out there and did.

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Speaker 1: They want to be in the trampoline or were you like,

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Speaker 1: get in there now, oscar.

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Speaker 2: Well it was pretty dark and cold by the time

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Speaker 2: I got.

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Speaker 1: Dad. Please anyway, twelve Ginger Beer being like you guys

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Speaker 1: having fun.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, they're good, So thank you again, Better Beer for

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Speaker 2: the Ginger Beer, lower Sugar get in India.

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Speaker 1: Can I ask just really quickly before we get into

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Speaker 1: the episode. We joked the other week about April's reaction

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Speaker 1: to Better Be here being a sponsor.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, like, obviously she doesn't know yet. No, look it's fine. Yeah, Look,

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Speaker 2: it wasn't the first choice. But where that's right? Now

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Speaker 2: she's up, she's working.

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Speaker 1: So this is not easy working, Like this podcast business

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Speaker 1: is hard work.

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Speaker 2: It's tough. Choose again, half empty. I wanted to just

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Speaker 2: quickly touch on something really quickly. You know, I've had

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Speaker 2: a rough week so far already Wednesday. But it's been

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Speaker 2: a rough week, a rough trot. As some would say,

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Speaker 2: We can't.

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Speaker 1: Go into detail, can we? No, No, because they'll be listening.

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Speaker 2: Potentially they'll be listening and that would end really badly.

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Speaker 2: But same time, but something worse happened, something more embarrassing happened.

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Speaker 2: Yesterday I was down the shops, just picked up a

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Speaker 2: few things as you do. You know what we're picking

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Speaker 2: up just condon.

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Speaker 1: Want definitely not you just like groceries. Grocery.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I just had to get you know, the usual

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Speaker 2: stuff like eggs, ship whatever, that sort of stuff. And

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Speaker 2: I've got a few things from Woolie's. I've got a

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Speaker 2: few things that weren't on the list. Okay, and you

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Speaker 2: know I love their brown paper bags. I just feel

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Speaker 2: like an elegant man walking out with the brown paper bag.

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Speaker 2: I don't know, I don't know something about it.

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Speaker 1: What do you mean?

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Speaker 2: They're just nice, They're just nice to carry. The nice

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Speaker 2: and square things fit in there nicely. I'm not rummaged

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Speaker 2: around with a plastic fucking suitcase.

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Speaker 1: Yeah I can't. I kind of get what you're saying.

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Speaker 1: But at the same time, I prefer the plastic one,

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Speaker 1: like the hard plastic, because they're more robust, like if

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Speaker 1: you're carrying milk and stuff.

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Speaker 2: I didn't have any others, and I don't have any

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Speaker 2: linen bags.

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Speaker 1: Although no products that were like letting out no more.

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Speaker 2: I stupidly overfilled them. Okay, now we think you know

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Speaker 2: where this is going. Yes, I was walking out to

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Speaker 2: the car and it just so happened to be school

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Speaker 2: knockoff time as a school across the street. Yep, and

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Speaker 2: they're all hall and these teenagers and you know what

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Speaker 2: teenagers are like, they're fucked. They're absolute assholes.

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Speaker 1: Took the words right out of my mouth.

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Speaker 2: Both bags snap right in front of all these school kids,

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Speaker 2: and it was just like, it's such an ick.

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Speaker 1: It's like that scene from Home Alone where he's got

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Speaker 1: the brown paper bags and they just bottom out.

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Speaker 2: Will happen, and it's like such an ick. If you

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Speaker 2: see someone, it's like, there's two things that I think

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Speaker 2: that's similar. There's picking up your groceries off the off

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Speaker 2: the floor of the car park or ground of the

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Speaker 2: car park. Yeah, that's bottom feeder, that's bottom feed And

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Speaker 2: also chasing a plastic bag that's in the wind. Weird

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Speaker 2: little run after a plastic bag that's called the wind.

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Speaker 1: It's just always out of reach. Did you lose the eggs?

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Speaker 2: No, they were on top, so like safe landing, Thank heavens,

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Speaker 2: Thank heavens. But look I was red faced.

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Speaker 1: Did you get a reaction from the kids, Oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: it was what are you staring at? I was just like,

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Speaker 1: get out of here, picking up your condoms.

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Speaker 2: It seems ash buy his home Brown. I wanted to

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Speaker 2: talk about Macy. Yes, so Lola's what two? Macy's coming

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Speaker 2: up to two? Lola's potty training as we worked out

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Speaker 2: last week, would you smite it all over the fucking wall.

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Speaker 2: Macy's almost almost too.

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Speaker 1: She's like six months out, how far.

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Speaker 2: Month in June? Five months five months out, say five

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Speaker 2: months out, So she's not potty training. She's still in

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Speaker 2: very much in nappies, diapers, whatever people's preferences on that.

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Speaker 2: And she's doing this thing now where she just disappears

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Speaker 2: and goes quiet. So it's safe to say a couple

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Speaker 2: of weeks ago, two weeks ago, it was just me

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Speaker 2: and Macy in the house. Anyway, I've got distracted and

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Speaker 2: I've lost Macey.

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Speaker 1: Hang on, wait, so you've lost her because we're in

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Speaker 1: your house right now and.

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Speaker 2: I've lost her.

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Speaker 1: It's not really.

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Speaker 2: I was distracted. I was doing something.

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Speaker 1: What are you doing? Drinking?

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Speaker 2: No? Go on, man, sorry no, I was probably scrolling

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Speaker 2: TikTok or taking a shit, and I was like, I

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Speaker 2: was just she was up there playing or whatever, and

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Speaker 2: then she's just gone quiet. I was like, I just

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Speaker 2: gone quiet. So I went try and find her. Went

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Speaker 2: into the bedroom, their bedroom, No one to be found.

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Speaker 2: Nowhere to be found. Back into my bedroom. Checked the

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Speaker 2: bathrooms as you do.

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Speaker 1: Am I losing my mind?

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Speaker 2: I thought, like, I'm fucking losing my mind. He checked

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Speaker 2: the balconies, even the doors shut. She's grown three foot

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Speaker 2: and reached the doors. I've come downstairs. Thought okay, she

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Speaker 2: must be in the kitchen because she loves the snack

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Speaker 2: cupboard is within reach for her. And I thought, gotta

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Speaker 2: be there, got to be down there somewhere.

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Speaker 1: But she's also not at the age where like it's

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Speaker 1: funny for kids when you're like where are you and

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Speaker 1: they hide because it's like hide and seek. Yeah, she's

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Speaker 1: not there yet.

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Speaker 2: Right now, she's like starting to know that it's Oh,

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Speaker 2: it's a game.

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Speaker 1: If you're like here, she won't come. She won't come.

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Speaker 2: No, But this was like she just went quiet. I

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Speaker 2: was like, fuck, Like where is she? I thought, because

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Speaker 2: she can get up and down the stairs backwards thankfully,

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Speaker 2: and I have downstairs. The doors are all shut. Going

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Speaker 2: to the garage and not in the garage, open the

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Speaker 2: front ship. At this point, I'm panicking.

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Speaker 1: At this time, right now, how long until April gets home.

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Speaker 2: A while.

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Speaker 1: See, Okay, so you're like, I'm panicking, but I would.

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Speaker 2: Have had enough time to go and steal another baby

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Speaker 2: and come back with it.

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Speaker 1: But I was like, doesn't make any sense.

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Speaker 2: I was like, where's she gone anyway? So I was like,

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Speaker 2: check back upstairs one more time. And I was like,

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Speaker 2: walked upstairs, checked in their bedroom. Nothing. I was like,

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Speaker 2: walk into our bedroom, and as I walked past our closet,

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Speaker 2: I just a waft was emitting. A waft went up

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Speaker 2: my nose. It happened to be shit.

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Speaker 1: Yes, so she's gone, you say, shit, Yeah.

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Speaker 2: She's gone. She's hidden in our cupboard. She's sitting on

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Speaker 2: top of the shoe rack. It's the three to two

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Speaker 2: or three story shoe rack, depending on how many levels

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Speaker 2: you account, and she was on top of that, sitting there, silent.

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Speaker 2: And what she's done. She's snuck off into our wardrobe

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Speaker 2: and taking a shit. And I would have never have

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Speaker 2: founder unless I walked past and smelt the waft of

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Speaker 2: baby shit straight up my nostrils. And since then, she's

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Speaker 2: continued to do it. So like the other day, we're

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Speaker 2: at a friend's house and she's gone again, completely gone.

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Speaker 2: She doesn't know this house anyway, like the balcony wrap around,

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Speaker 2: she's completely gone. And then i'd come around the corner,

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Speaker 2: she's out there like looking at me.

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Speaker 1: Like don't like, what are you doing?

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Speaker 2: So at the moment, it's kind of like a hide

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Speaker 2: and go poosy situation.

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Speaker 1: It's weird that they go through that phase of wanting

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Speaker 1: to have a bit of privacy, because they definitely come

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Speaker 1: out of it like now my kids will just shit.

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Speaker 2: And then Laura's done the complete one eighty or three

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Speaker 2: sixty where she's like she's like, I'm just shit rush.

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Speaker 1: But it's funny how they do that, don't you reckon?

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Speaker 1: Like I remember Marley would sit down and squat behind

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Speaker 1: the couch and just like just to have like a

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Speaker 1: little bit of privacy. And I'd look over and she'd

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Speaker 1: be like popping a vein from a forehead.

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Speaker 2: That look well, I told you about my friend that

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Speaker 2: had the poo runner, remember, oh yeah yeah, And when

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Speaker 2: he needs to pooh, he just takes off in like circles,

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Speaker 2: like running and running and running, and he would just

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Speaker 2: find a spot where no one's looking, like, I mean,

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Speaker 2: they don't know any better. But like also, like I

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Speaker 2: think Macy thinks it's some sort of game. Now if

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Speaker 2: I know, I can't hear her for a little bit

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Speaker 2: of time, am I smeller? Just getting a nappy out

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Speaker 2: and the whips and I'm prepping.

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Speaker 1: It's a really annoying time as well when they start

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Speaker 1: going onto solids and their poos go from being like

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Speaker 1: a kind of like a purely breast milk or milk

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Speaker 1: based poo to then transitioning to like having solids form

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Speaker 1: that pool, and it's like the smellers I know.

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Speaker 2: And then also it was like can I check it? Why?

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Speaker 2: What for?

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Speaker 1: Well?

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Speaker 2: You should know this. Apparently you can say a lot

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Speaker 2: about the baby's health by their ship.

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Speaker 1: Obviously you don't want it to runny, but it comes.

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Speaker 2: It's just coming across a bit now, like if you

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Speaker 2: want to check every poo, like, what is it your thing? Now?

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Speaker 1: But surely I'm doing it for a medical reason. Are

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Speaker 1: you eating Macy's No?

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Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no checking if she's

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Speaker 2: healthy taste? Yeah, look, so hide and go pooh seek

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Speaker 2: with Macy lately?

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Speaker 1: What's your trigger for when you guys will get to

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Speaker 1: add a nappies during the day to start potty training?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 1: Look, is that an April question. I'll be on the spot.

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Speaker 2: I don't know, classic dad, do you know what? The

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Speaker 2: other day as well, I was at the doctors with

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Speaker 2: Macy because she needed a clearance to go back to

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Speaker 2: Kindy or something. Anyway, went to just like the medical

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Speaker 2: center down here really early, first in and the guy goes,

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Speaker 2: who does she usually see?

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Speaker 1: Is it like the regular doctor?

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Speaker 2: I was like, I have no idea. He was like,

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Speaker 2: is this your baby? I was like, yeah, let me

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Speaker 2: just go them up a classic dad has no idea?

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Speaker 1: Did you have the blue books? I always going there

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Speaker 1: like where's the blue book?

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Speaker 2: And I'm like, I thought the blue book for when

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Speaker 2: you just when you just have them? I mean you

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Speaker 2: could you got offer me baby journal?

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Speaker 1: Well apparently like I don't know when you stop.

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Speaker 2: Dad forgot and my GP's.

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Speaker 1: Name anyone who doesn't have kids. When you have a

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Speaker 1: baby there then and there isn't it. They're like, here's

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Speaker 1: your baby, and you get.

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Speaker 2: Baby comes out with it under a time, here's my

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Speaker 2: blue book.

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Speaker 1: Sigh. You get like a little gift pack you get.

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Speaker 2: Like from New South Wales Healthy in this instance.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you get a little tote bag and it has

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Speaker 1: goodies can't remember what's in there. I think I know,

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Speaker 1: I start, I stell a couple of blankets from the hospital.

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Speaker 2: Oh the stripy color there class, Yeah, we took one

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Speaker 2: for the dog so the dog could get used to

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Speaker 2: the smell before the baby came home.

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Speaker 1: Very good, very good. It didn't work, But within that,

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Speaker 1: it is a blue book and that's meant to be

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Speaker 1: you thing for like every it has like has it's

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Speaker 1: like your car. Essentially also lose in my car as well.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, night man, I know, like I don't even know

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Speaker 2: where it is, but April will be able to whip

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Speaker 2: it out. Yeah, he keep it on me at all times.

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Speaker 2: This is my one too. Anyway, that's maze at the moment.

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Speaker 1: A question, what is your bedtime?

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Speaker 2: I'm going to rinse me about my bedtime on this

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Speaker 2: last night, I was in bed at seven point thirty.

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Speaker 2: I'm essentially a toddler.

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Speaker 1: Okay, can you just just like really really top line,

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Speaker 1: don't have to go to so much detail. What time

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Speaker 1: did the kids go to bed? What's your schedule? Like?

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Speaker 2: Well, makes is usually in bed by like seven?

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Speaker 1: Okay, so dinner at six? What time?

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Speaker 2: I feel like you call me out? I had dinner

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Speaker 2: last night.

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Speaker 1: At five o'clock.

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Speaker 2: I get so much shit about this from my friends

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Speaker 2: because they're like.

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Speaker 1: Dinner at five is not even dark yet?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, wait till summer. It's definitely not like it's midday

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Speaker 2: when we have dinner.

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Speaker 1: So you have dinner with the kids or it.

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Speaker 2: Varies depending on how hungry April is. Shit. But yeah,

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Speaker 2: so like for example, last night last night, I had

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Speaker 2: dinner at five quarter.

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Speaker 1: Past five wow. Wow.

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Speaker 2: Then bath macy the bed oscar to bed like bit

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Speaker 2: after seven last night and daddy's lights out.

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Speaker 1: Are you asleep by seventeen?

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Speaker 2: No? No, no, no, I'm like sleep by like eight thirty.

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Speaker 2: If you message me after eight, you're not getting respect.

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Speaker 2: You've noticed, no totally. It says ash has do not disturb.

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Speaker 2: And it's like three in the afternoon, I'm having a nap, man,

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Speaker 2: I get a message from you are like twelve o'clocking like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: good luck, champ, but you know you've noticed that you.

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Speaker 2: I'll respond when I'm on the pier like okay, well

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Speaker 2: I've got in for another few hours. Now let's have

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Speaker 2: a business meeting real quick.

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Speaker 1: And so how does it work then with the kids,

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Speaker 1: Like because obviously Macy's in a cot still yeah yeah, yeah, Oscar,

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Speaker 1: what's he sleeping.

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Speaker 2: He's in a single bed with a he's in a cage.

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Speaker 2: He's in a cage in the garage.

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Speaker 1: Is he able to leave his bed?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, and he does. He comes gets in.

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Speaker 1: With us on average, like every night.

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Speaker 2: It's an argument every time before we go to bed.

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Speaker 2: You say, you stay in your bed all night.

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Speaker 1: And he's there thinking shut up.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah. So instead of now bribing him with things

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Speaker 2: to staying there, I've decided to take things back to

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Speaker 2: the shop. So, like, he's got this bike, hot Wheels

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Speaker 2: bike who rides around the living room. I think it's

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Speaker 2: outside of the moment. And he loves it, obviously he

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Speaker 2: loves it. And the other night you're sleeping in your

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Speaker 2: bed all nights And he's like nope, that's stupid face.

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Speaker 2: And I was like, well you are, because otherwise I'm

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Speaker 2: taking that fucking Hot Wheels thing and I'm taking it

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Speaker 2: back to the shop. I didn't say fucking or maybe

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Speaker 2: I did. I really register it. I'm taking it back

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Speaker 2: to the shop and he's like no, And I was like,

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Speaker 2: we'll sleep in your bed. He's like no. I'm like

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Speaker 2: how are you not working this out? Work work it out?

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Speaker 2: So he did that night and he got keep it.

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Speaker 2: But then last nime.

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Speaker 1: Just putting the fear of God and yeah, you.

365
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Speaker 2: Know, but then he started doing this thing where he's like,

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Speaker 2: I don't know, man, how do you how do you go? No,

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Speaker 2: you didn't. It's like, tell me all about it. Because

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Speaker 2: someone says to me, watch your nightmare last night. I'm

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Speaker 2: just like, I did that thing where you're trying and

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Speaker 2: punch someone and you can't do it. Are you trying

371
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Speaker 2: to run after something and running backwards?

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Speaker 1: Marley had a nightmare and it was about the fact

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Speaker 1: that she wanted some warm water in a bottle and

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Speaker 1: the babysitter said no to her, and that was her nightmare.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, Yeah, the life of a toddler. It'd

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Speaker 1: be sweet, wouldn't it. That's your biggest worry, that's your nightmare.

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Speaker 2: God, that'd be amazing. I'm having nightmares about having to

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Speaker 2: wake up and go to work. Real problems, real problems, Marley, real.

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Speaker 1: Problem when I comes into bed. Are you guys like

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Speaker 1: this is fine?

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Speaker 2: You try and look at that point, it's about sleep. Yeah,

382
00:18:57,200 --> 00:18:59,399
Speaker 2: the punts is annoying because he just does that little

383
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Speaker 2: half cry thing if you're not cuddling him, like.

384
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Speaker 1: They'll get ya and I get ya. Shut the I

385
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:10,680
Speaker 1: remember speaking to other parents about bedtime routines, and here

386
00:19:10,760 --> 00:19:13,000
Speaker 1: it is, before I had kids, hearing a parent talk

387
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Speaker 1: about like co sleeping, having their child in bed with them,

388
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Speaker 1: and I remember thinking, what the fuck is wrong with

389
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:20,160
Speaker 1: you letting your child sleep in your bed, Like that's

390
00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:23,280
Speaker 1: just gonna, I think, just make them really dependent. And

391
00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:27,040
Speaker 1: also it's just gonna then ruin you know, any intimacy

392
00:19:27,040 --> 00:19:28,640
Speaker 1: with you on your partner when your child keeps coming

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Speaker 1: in the middle of the night.

394
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Speaker 2: Yeah, Look, we go through phases where he can sleep

395
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Speaker 2: with us, and then we get him to go back.

396
00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:38,320
Speaker 2: He's pretty good at going back. Like he'll come in

397
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Speaker 2: at like three, four o'clock in the morning and there's

398
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Speaker 2: no action having at three or four o'clock in at

399
00:19:42,720 --> 00:19:44,159
Speaker 2: that point. A lot of time you just sneaks and

400
00:19:44,160 --> 00:19:45,520
Speaker 2: you don't even know he's there, and I wake up

401
00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:47,159
Speaker 2: and as a child's foot in my face.

402
00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:51,040
Speaker 1: Right. Yeah, because yeah, Marley, nowadays, like I would say,

403
00:19:51,320 --> 00:19:52,320
Speaker 1: every single night.

404
00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:54,280
Speaker 2: If she's in there every night, Now, if.

405
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:55,880
Speaker 1: I wake up in the morning and she's not there.

406
00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:58,120
Speaker 1: Oh my god, this is weird. I don't even register now,

407
00:19:58,160 --> 00:20:01,560
Speaker 1: Like she just slots in where the beds positioned. She'll

408
00:20:01,600 --> 00:20:04,240
Speaker 1: come to me first because I'm like closest to the doorway,

409
00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:07,480
Speaker 1: and it's almost like just you know, in my sleep,

410
00:20:07,520 --> 00:20:09,760
Speaker 1: I just grab her and I put her in accept

411
00:20:11,040 --> 00:20:15,359
Speaker 1: Except last night wasn't a smooth operation. We had a

412
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Speaker 1: little incident in the bedroom.

413
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Speaker 2: Okay, you seem to be having instance in the bedroom

414
00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:20,600
Speaker 2: all the time.

415
00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:24,320
Speaker 1: And this one's not like animals, This is not this

416
00:20:24,400 --> 00:20:27,399
Speaker 1: is not sexually it's not sexulated. Unfortunately, I wish it was,

417
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:36,520
Speaker 1: which it would be. Yeah with my wife's Okay, So

418
00:20:37,359 --> 00:20:39,760
Speaker 1: in the middle of the night Marley's obviously you know

419
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:41,720
Speaker 1: she's working up at like one or two o'clock, which

420
00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:44,960
Speaker 1: is normally when she comes in. She's started walking towards

421
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Speaker 1: the bed.

422
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Speaker 2: And punch her out like she was an intruder.

423
00:20:53,119 --> 00:20:56,720
Speaker 1: Well, I don't recall doing this. This is just me.

424
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Speaker 1: This is me. I'm a protective kind of guy. You know,

425
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:00,600
Speaker 1: I'm looking up.

426
00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:04,359
Speaker 2: Oh you look real alpha. I can't imagine in the

427
00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:07,159
Speaker 2: middle of the night. How yeah, I'll love to do

428
00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:11,160
Speaker 2: what your pajamas the classes with a flap at the back.

429
00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:13,440
Speaker 2: Real project you've got.

430
00:21:14,840 --> 00:21:18,880
Speaker 1: She's tried to like pull up the doubt and slot in,

431
00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:23,240
Speaker 1: and I've in my sleep, I've had my instincts have

432
00:21:23,359 --> 00:21:26,199
Speaker 1: kicked in, thinking someone's trying to like I don't know,

433
00:21:26,240 --> 00:21:28,439
Speaker 1: it's like a dog trying to attack us, and so

434
00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:33,439
Speaker 1: I've like grabbed her and like thrown her.

435
00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:34,960
Speaker 2: Oh my god.

436
00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:38,720
Speaker 1: And then I just I kind of like, I'm half asleep,

437
00:21:38,720 --> 00:21:39,520
Speaker 1: but I hear this like.

438
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:45,280
Speaker 2: You threw your child across the room, pushed on You

439
00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:46,800
Speaker 2: just said you grabbed her and through it.

440
00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:48,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, but you make it sound so much more just.

441
00:21:48,840 --> 00:21:53,919
Speaker 2: Gathering evidence just in case, just for the testimony.

442
00:21:55,520 --> 00:21:58,880
Speaker 1: And obviously Marley starts bawling her eyes out. She's wailing,

443
00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:01,840
Speaker 1: oh yeah. And I'm still going to half asleep. Takes

444
00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:04,439
Speaker 1: me a while to get the engine running, and Laura

445
00:22:04,480 --> 00:22:05,919
Speaker 1: is like, what the hell was that. I'm like, I

446
00:22:05,920 --> 00:22:08,400
Speaker 1: don't know, rabid dog's broken into the house and I've

447
00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:09,120
Speaker 1: just saved us.

448
00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:13,880
Speaker 2: Oh the floor she hit the floor.

449
00:22:14,080 --> 00:22:17,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, I threw onto the carpet. I was protecting the family.

450
00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:19,880
Speaker 1: It's my instincts.

451
00:22:20,080 --> 00:22:21,199
Speaker 2: Social services up in you.

452
00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:25,160
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm sure it's not the.

453
00:22:25,119 --> 00:22:27,960
Speaker 2: First You're not the first parent to think any intruders

454
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:28,359
Speaker 2: in your.

455
00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:30,359
Speaker 1: Bed, Like sometimes it's scary.

456
00:22:30,160 --> 00:22:32,600
Speaker 2: Especially where you live like you once. At the end

457
00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:36,880
Speaker 2: of the it's a bit sketchy. So I think it's

458
00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:42,160
Speaker 2: fair play. Play on. So she's okay. Obviously she.

459
00:22:43,760 --> 00:22:46,159
Speaker 1: Was fine. No, yeah, she's like desiccated shoulder. She's ok

460
00:22:46,359 --> 00:22:47,120
Speaker 1: No big deal.

461
00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:48,560
Speaker 2: Hope just eight weeks out.

462
00:22:48,680 --> 00:22:51,120
Speaker 1: I was secretly hoping that it might deter her from

463
00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:52,480
Speaker 1: coming in the next night.

464
00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:57,560
Speaker 2: Did it well? Even half she ran in, She ran

465
00:22:57,600 --> 00:23:03,560
Speaker 2: in like a hit up, comes in with shoulder pads.

466
00:23:03,680 --> 00:23:07,240
Speaker 2: Karen Football starts up. That's how you get your kids

467
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:08,400
Speaker 2: to not sleep with you anymore?

468
00:23:08,560 --> 00:23:10,840
Speaker 1: Yes, crash tackle them to the ground.

469
00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:13,239
Speaker 2: This podcast is full of advice. I fly kick them

470
00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:14,960
Speaker 2: to the head, straight to the head.

471
00:23:15,040 --> 00:23:25,800
Speaker 1: Problem solved, Cash, It is time to answer some questions

472
00:23:25,800 --> 00:23:29,440
Speaker 1: which have been submitted by lovely listeners. We always go

473
00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:32,760
Speaker 1: with two questions. I guess this part of the podcast

474
00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:38,840
Speaker 1: is where you may there may be a peppering of advice.

475
00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:40,840
Speaker 2: Except for what we just talked about previously, where you've

476
00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:42,160
Speaker 2: how to get your kids out of your bed.

477
00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:44,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I think if anyone does come for advice,

478
00:23:44,680 --> 00:23:48,320
Speaker 1: normally you just skip through three quarters. Come here, you

479
00:23:48,359 --> 00:23:51,159
Speaker 1: may get something. It's like if you're looking for gold

480
00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:51,639
Speaker 1: and creek.

481
00:23:52,080 --> 00:23:53,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, you like you.

482
00:23:53,160 --> 00:23:55,359
Speaker 1: Comes at the end, you may get a sprinkling of

483
00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:56,000
Speaker 1: gold dust.

484
00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:58,080
Speaker 2: Unlikely, it always the last place you look.

485
00:23:59,119 --> 00:24:01,920
Speaker 1: Definitely no nugget. Yeah, but this first question is an

486
00:24:01,920 --> 00:24:04,240
Speaker 1: interesting one. This one popped up and we both went, oh,

487
00:24:04,320 --> 00:24:06,280
Speaker 1: I won't say who it's from. Some people have said,

488
00:24:06,480 --> 00:24:07,960
Speaker 1: we really like it that you didn't put our name

489
00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:08,240
Speaker 1: in there.

490
00:24:08,359 --> 00:24:09,000
Speaker 2: Let's stick with that.

491
00:24:09,080 --> 00:24:11,440
Speaker 1: Let's run it will always make it anonymous, unless you

492
00:24:11,520 --> 00:24:12,880
Speaker 1: say I want to call out, then well.

493
00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:14,880
Speaker 2: I don't want to get them in trouble or like,

494
00:24:15,080 --> 00:24:15,639
Speaker 2: because we're.

495
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:17,440
Speaker 1: All about keeping the peace between relationships.

496
00:24:17,560 --> 00:24:19,639
Speaker 2: Well, we started the episode with that, so I suppose

497
00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:21,119
Speaker 2: a bit of finish with that.

498
00:24:22,280 --> 00:24:24,200
Speaker 1: Okay, we've got a question for you guys.

499
00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:27,399
Speaker 2: How did you go for you guys? For me? Is

500
00:24:27,440 --> 00:24:27,760
Speaker 2: it for me?

501
00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:28,360
Speaker 1: Oh?

502
00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:29,720
Speaker 2: No? This is or.

503
00:24:33,960 --> 00:24:37,200
Speaker 1: Question for us guys coming from it's coming from a

504
00:24:37,280 --> 00:24:40,160
Speaker 1: mum here. Okay, how did you go with sexy time

505
00:24:40,440 --> 00:24:42,840
Speaker 1: during pregnancy? Were you into it? Or were you a

506
00:24:42,840 --> 00:24:45,320
Speaker 1: little bit turned off? Slash freaked out? She kind of

507
00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:48,520
Speaker 1: gives some context here she's with her second partner, she's

508
00:24:48,560 --> 00:24:51,480
Speaker 1: pregnant with her third. She has two older boys with

509
00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:54,240
Speaker 1: someone else, and she said that she's experienced this with

510
00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:56,760
Speaker 1: both men now that they're just not into it. So

511
00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:59,359
Speaker 1: she says, is it not being attracted to me whilst

512
00:24:59,359 --> 00:25:02,879
Speaker 1: I'm pregnant or is it thinking they're poking the baby's head.

513
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:05,920
Speaker 1: I'm interested to know how you guys were with this

514
00:25:06,240 --> 00:25:09,600
Speaker 1: and how your wives reacted. She wants at twenty four

515
00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:11,640
Speaker 1: to seven. Huh yeah, good on her.

516
00:25:11,960 --> 00:25:16,160
Speaker 2: That's not that's the dream, I think. Look, unless you're

517
00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:19,560
Speaker 2: hung like an absolute horse, you're not poking anyone in

518
00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:19,800
Speaker 2: the head.

519
00:25:19,920 --> 00:25:24,760
Speaker 1: Champ, Well that's Mike cue to say that as a

520
00:25:24,760 --> 00:25:28,120
Speaker 1: man with an enormous cock ash. It was a very

521
00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:30,480
Speaker 1: big concern for me. Oh okay, I thought that mine

522
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:31,640
Speaker 1: is very long, very thin.

523
00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:36,359
Speaker 2: I've seen your budget smokers, mate, no grower, nothing to

524
00:25:36,359 --> 00:25:38,520
Speaker 2: worry about. Look, it's definitely different.

525
00:25:38,840 --> 00:25:40,640
Speaker 1: Did you have more sexy time?

526
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:42,560
Speaker 2: I think it was like pretty standard, Like I don't

527
00:25:42,560 --> 00:25:45,800
Speaker 2: think a whole lot changed, but it's always also going

528
00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:48,200
Speaker 2: to be like in how far along.

529
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:50,639
Speaker 1: I was kind of into it. I kind of liked it.

530
00:25:50,680 --> 00:25:54,520
Speaker 2: Well, obviously the vision is getting ready for childbirth. Yes,

531
00:25:54,640 --> 00:25:55,960
Speaker 2: so there is changes.

532
00:25:56,280 --> 00:26:01,920
Speaker 1: It's a bit more plump plump, which it's a good thing.

533
00:26:02,240 --> 00:26:05,560
Speaker 2: It's great, exactly right. Look it was, yeah, I would

534
00:26:05,600 --> 00:26:10,320
Speaker 2: say for the first six months were still happening, and

535
00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:11,879
Speaker 2: then I think as we got close to the end,

536
00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:13,600
Speaker 2: she was just more uncomfortable.

537
00:26:13,119 --> 00:26:15,840
Speaker 1: Right, totally totally and like you can't you know.

538
00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:18,639
Speaker 2: I can't, Maneve, Yeah, you know, I'd be like, Laura,

539
00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:20,919
Speaker 2: get up if you need a roller over. It's like

540
00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:22,040
Speaker 2: one two three.

541
00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:26,840
Speaker 1: I asked Laura, I know, I said, like were you

542
00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:27,640
Speaker 1: were you hornier?

543
00:26:27,720 --> 00:26:30,280
Speaker 2: And she was like, nah, I see, I was meant

544
00:26:30,280 --> 00:26:32,520
Speaker 2: to ask it this morning and I forgot, But I'm

545
00:26:32,560 --> 00:26:34,560
Speaker 2: going to say she wasn't. I'm going to say it,

546
00:26:34,600 --> 00:26:37,680
Speaker 2: like I said, it was pretty normal for most of it.

547
00:26:37,880 --> 00:26:41,560
Speaker 1: But I kind of I don't know, like I kind

548
00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:45,359
Speaker 1: of thought it was like being so I'm trying to

549
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:50,960
Speaker 1: find my words here, Laura being so womanly. I found

550
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:51,919
Speaker 1: that like a turn on.

551
00:26:52,320 --> 00:26:56,680
Speaker 2: I don't know what that means, the.

552
00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:59,679
Speaker 1: Fact that she was like mothering my credit. I don't know,

553
00:26:59,760 --> 00:27:03,560
Speaker 1: sound sounds weird when I try and verbalize it.

554
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:05,640
Speaker 2: Yea, I just found it, like the whole the whole.

555
00:27:06,480 --> 00:27:08,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's sexy, like she's you know.

556
00:27:08,600 --> 00:27:10,760
Speaker 2: Carrying my childe.

557
00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:13,359
Speaker 1: Yeah, all of that put together.

558
00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:16,080
Speaker 2: Okay, you just don't know. Some people, it could be

559
00:27:16,359 --> 00:27:19,320
Speaker 2: their turn off, could be completely attractive to the look

560
00:27:19,400 --> 00:27:26,760
Speaker 2: of what they're actually mounting. Otherwise it could be much

561
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:29,960
Speaker 2: more emotional, like yours sounds more emotional. So look, I

562
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:33,520
Speaker 2: think we obviously can't answer this question because we're just

563
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:38,639
Speaker 2: two people with no idea. Okay, So for me, like

564
00:27:38,760 --> 00:27:41,360
Speaker 2: I said, it wasn't a turn on and it wasn't

565
00:27:41,400 --> 00:27:41,879
Speaker 2: a turn off.

566
00:27:42,920 --> 00:27:46,480
Speaker 1: Did you though, towards the tail end of the pregnancy,

567
00:27:46,840 --> 00:27:49,760
Speaker 1: you know, this is when my baby's very close to

568
00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:53,320
Speaker 1: coming out. Did it ever enter your deliveries a quick,

569
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:57,879
Speaker 1: quick five minutes? I would, You know, sometimes in the

570
00:27:57,920 --> 00:28:00,400
Speaker 1: middle of sex, I'd be like, holy shit, I'm about

571
00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:02,280
Speaker 1: to become a dad sun And obviously that's not a

572
00:28:02,320 --> 00:28:04,920
Speaker 1: thought that you want to have, as you're I didn't.

573
00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:05,840
Speaker 2: I didn't. I don't recall having that.

574
00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:07,320
Speaker 1: You didn't look at the belly and go that's going

575
00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:09,120
Speaker 1: to be my child, not even.

576
00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:13,000
Speaker 2: Once, yeah, but not like during it. Sometimes I train

577
00:28:13,040 --> 00:28:13,800
Speaker 2: on something else.

578
00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:15,840
Speaker 1: Man, So I would sometimes I'd be like, holy shit,

579
00:28:15,960 --> 00:28:17,399
Speaker 1: that's going to be my daughter a right, and then

580
00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:18,119
Speaker 1: I'd be like, oh.

581
00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:20,479
Speaker 2: God, no, I know what you mean. She was saying,

582
00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:23,280
Speaker 2: he's just not that both just not been into It's

583
00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:25,480
Speaker 2: probably just going to come down to the person. That's

584
00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:26,800
Speaker 2: my answer to that question.

585
00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:31,160
Speaker 1: Long story short, sometimes during sex you do think of

586
00:28:31,280 --> 00:28:33,760
Speaker 1: what is actually happening here, and there's a child in

587
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:34,080
Speaker 1: the room.

588
00:28:34,160 --> 00:28:38,720
Speaker 2: The longer process. Yes, all right, Matthew. So our second

589
00:28:38,760 --> 00:28:41,960
Speaker 2: question today comes from one of our lovely listeners and

590
00:28:42,080 --> 00:28:45,520
Speaker 2: it comes that's weird. Oh my god, I get through it.

591
00:28:45,840 --> 00:28:49,920
Speaker 2: Just let me get okay. Question number two, Yes, yes,

592
00:28:50,120 --> 00:28:53,280
Speaker 2: having your child circumcised? Are you for or against?

593
00:28:54,240 --> 00:28:55,720
Speaker 1: I think I'm for it.

594
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:59,000
Speaker 2: I think I mean, don't give you that look your form.

595
00:28:59,080 --> 00:29:01,920
Speaker 2: Mutilating a child's peenis that sounds about right?

596
00:29:01,960 --> 00:29:04,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's freak, it's cleaner, right. I heard the numbers

597
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:07,000
Speaker 1: have dropped off. I feel like not as many people

598
00:29:07,040 --> 00:29:08,800
Speaker 1: are getting the snip for their kids.

599
00:29:09,040 --> 00:29:09,280
Speaker 2: Nah.

600
00:29:09,480 --> 00:29:12,080
Speaker 1: In the nineties, I was born in eighty seven. I

601
00:29:12,120 --> 00:29:14,160
Speaker 1: think the nineties it was like all the rage. It

602
00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:16,320
Speaker 1: was like fondu fondu un circumcision.

603
00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:20,880
Speaker 2: So my friend group is split up in between circumcised

604
00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:24,880
Speaker 2: and uncircumcised, and it's always a consistent battle.

605
00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:27,120
Speaker 1: What do you mean as in like people like the circumcised.

606
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:28,680
Speaker 1: We all have a Sunday barbecue and the.

607
00:29:28,720 --> 00:29:31,760
Speaker 2: Unders making fun of the other one the party.

608
00:29:31,760 --> 00:29:33,160
Speaker 1: It's segregated personally.

609
00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:36,280
Speaker 2: I am uncircumcised and thankful because I need the length,

610
00:29:40,800 --> 00:29:44,200
Speaker 2: And Oscar is also uncircumcised because I know he's also

611
00:29:44,360 --> 00:29:45,280
Speaker 2: going to need the length.

612
00:29:45,320 --> 00:29:49,000
Speaker 1: Builthy animals, You are disgusting. I can smell parmes and

613
00:29:49,080 --> 00:29:49,680
Speaker 1: cheese from here.

614
00:29:49,680 --> 00:29:52,160
Speaker 2: Okay, you're telling me that if you had a baby

615
00:29:52,200 --> 00:29:54,320
Speaker 2: boy right now, you would cut the end of its

616
00:29:54,320 --> 00:29:56,720
Speaker 2: dick off. What would you do? Wear it around your

617
00:29:56,760 --> 00:29:58,000
Speaker 2: neck like a trophy?

618
00:29:58,320 --> 00:29:59,000
Speaker 1: Absolutely?

619
00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:02,840
Speaker 2: Freak huh girl. Dads would be like that too.

620
00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:07,840
Speaker 1: This has now become anyone listening who's circumcised. I think

621
00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:11,000
Speaker 1: what you've done is an admirable thing. You are a

622
00:30:11,040 --> 00:30:12,760
Speaker 1: clean individual, great hygiene.

623
00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:15,480
Speaker 2: There is this like bit of war though, like women

624
00:30:15,560 --> 00:30:18,920
Speaker 2: have go do you prefer them circumcised? I think that's

625
00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:23,080
Speaker 2: just your just blankt and assumptions. Get April down there,

626
00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:25,000
Speaker 2: flop me cock out.

627
00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:29,840
Speaker 1: Okay. I was circumcised, not for religious reasons.

628
00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:32,160
Speaker 2: But because it was too big.

629
00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:37,720
Speaker 1: I wish it was too big. I had too much foreskin.

630
00:30:37,560 --> 00:30:38,240
Speaker 2: Had a five skin.

631
00:30:38,440 --> 00:30:41,360
Speaker 1: I had half cock half skin.

632
00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:44,800
Speaker 2: Oh really fifty to fifty Yeah, I was fifty.

633
00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:49,120
Speaker 1: So what happened was I was six at the time. Whoa,

634
00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:52,560
Speaker 1: I was once one of you, and I thought.

635
00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:53,640
Speaker 2: It's yeah, so you're a trader.

636
00:30:53,920 --> 00:30:58,160
Speaker 1: So the age of six, I thought, well, this is

637
00:30:58,240 --> 00:31:01,320
Speaker 1: now it's you know, obviously this point, I'm now going

638
00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:03,560
Speaker 1: to grow up being uncircumcised. I was hanging out with

639
00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:07,680
Speaker 1: the uncircumcised kids. I'd form my allegiances, and then all

640
00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:12,280
Speaker 1: of a sudden, my mom, Yeah, she brought the boys

641
00:31:12,280 --> 00:31:16,360
Speaker 1: together because I'm one of five kids, three boys, four

642
00:31:16,360 --> 00:31:20,280
Speaker 1: boys in the family. So the issue was someone kept

643
00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:26,240
Speaker 1: pissing everywhere, all over the toilet floor, it was everywhere.

644
00:31:26,280 --> 00:31:28,560
Speaker 1: I don't think I knew. I think I just thought

645
00:31:28,560 --> 00:31:29,479
Speaker 1: that was how you pissed.

646
00:31:29,560 --> 00:31:33,560
Speaker 2: I don't know, well, like a like an elephant's trunk

647
00:31:33,560 --> 00:31:35,920
Speaker 2: when it's super excited living around.

648
00:31:36,800 --> 00:31:39,800
Speaker 1: Because I had so much foreskin, it would just like

649
00:31:39,840 --> 00:31:42,040
Speaker 1: it would ruin the spray and it had come out

650
00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:46,440
Speaker 1: like a oh my god, so much to that, and

651
00:31:46,480 --> 00:31:48,520
Speaker 1: there would just be pissed everywhere, and I'd be like

652
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:50,680
Speaker 1: that was a good one, and then I'd leave my mom.

653
00:31:50,760 --> 00:31:54,040
Speaker 1: My mom would come and being like, fuck.

654
00:31:53,960 --> 00:31:56,480
Speaker 2: Is this so you're telling me that your mom chopped

655
00:31:56,480 --> 00:31:58,000
Speaker 2: the end of you, dick off because you didn't want

656
00:31:58,000 --> 00:31:59,920
Speaker 2: to clean up the bathroom anymore in the kitchen and

657
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:03,240
Speaker 2: said I thought I was going to say, we got

658
00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:11,200
Speaker 2: all the kids together and took a vote should be to.

659
00:32:09,880 --> 00:32:13,400
Speaker 1: Sacrifice of me on a Friday evening in the backyard

660
00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:16,880
Speaker 1: in the goat, but my mom pulled me aside and

661
00:32:16,920 --> 00:32:19,840
Speaker 1: she was like, hey, can I I think she must

662
00:32:19,880 --> 00:32:21,560
Speaker 1: have been like, can I just have a quick look,

663
00:32:22,120 --> 00:32:25,360
Speaker 1: and then she was like, fuck, he's got a big car.

664
00:32:26,360 --> 00:32:29,200
Speaker 1: It's a lot of foreskin went to the doctor and

665
00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:30,360
Speaker 1: wait to see your mum again.

666
00:32:30,360 --> 00:32:31,280
Speaker 2: I'm gonna yeah.

667
00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:34,120
Speaker 1: I mean, it must be sad for you recording in

668
00:32:34,200 --> 00:32:36,240
Speaker 1: your house this time and my mom's not around.

669
00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:39,920
Speaker 2: I know, you just save this so I can't be like.

670
00:32:44,000 --> 00:32:45,280
Speaker 1: I went to the doctors and they were like, we

671
00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:46,640
Speaker 1: got to get rid of it. It's too much on

672
00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:47,280
Speaker 1: the young fella.

673
00:32:47,440 --> 00:32:53,400
Speaker 2: I don't believe this where I feel like you absolutely

674
00:32:53,560 --> 00:32:54,560
Speaker 2: trying to pull one over.

675
00:32:54,880 --> 00:32:57,960
Speaker 1: I swear to god, I'm not trying to so then

676
00:32:58,120 --> 00:33:00,600
Speaker 1: at the age of yeah, ages six, so I was

677
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:03,280
Speaker 1: grade one at a time and I had to then.

678
00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:06,120
Speaker 1: You remember saying to the classroom. I was like, guys,

679
00:33:06,120 --> 00:33:09,920
Speaker 1: I'm going into surgery. Wish me luck. It's booked for tomorrow.

680
00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:12,640
Speaker 1: When I come out of it, I will no longer

681
00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:16,080
Speaker 1: be the Maddy j that I was once before. And

682
00:33:16,200 --> 00:33:20,320
Speaker 1: I remember waking up and the words that I was

683
00:33:20,360 --> 00:33:23,440
Speaker 1: told by the doctor were very comforting, said surgery had

684
00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:25,240
Speaker 1: gone well, and.

685
00:33:25,640 --> 00:33:29,200
Speaker 2: We added two extra inches because we felt sorry for that.

686
00:33:31,960 --> 00:33:34,960
Speaker 1: But I remember, it's weird how some things stick out

687
00:33:35,040 --> 00:33:36,640
Speaker 1: in your mind, like your penis.

688
00:33:40,760 --> 00:33:41,840
Speaker 2: It's meant to do that.

689
00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:46,120
Speaker 1: My penis was bandaged up. It was like it was

690
00:33:46,160 --> 00:33:48,000
Speaker 1: so girthy for the thought it was going to be

691
00:33:48,040 --> 00:33:51,240
Speaker 1: hell yeah, I was like yes, but he made me

692
00:33:51,280 --> 00:33:53,720
Speaker 1: go do a week to make sure that the bandages

693
00:33:53,760 --> 00:33:55,680
Speaker 1: weren't covering, and it was all fine.

694
00:33:55,840 --> 00:33:58,320
Speaker 2: Was like a little target, like let's see how you

695
00:33:58,320 --> 00:34:00,840
Speaker 2: get bull's eye, you good fellas.

696
00:34:01,200 --> 00:34:04,080
Speaker 1: This is a fucking serious story, and you're just there

697
00:34:04,160 --> 00:34:07,640
Speaker 1: taking them. I think, being vulnerable and opening myself up.

698
00:34:07,720 --> 00:34:10,319
Speaker 1: I think, no, this is true and so love this.

699
00:34:10,560 --> 00:34:11,279
Speaker 2: Did she keep it?

700
00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:15,000
Speaker 1: I don't think she did. I haven't. I can't confirmed.

701
00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:16,560
Speaker 2: I've got a phone number you can ask it.

702
00:34:16,960 --> 00:34:19,560
Speaker 1: I'm assuming that Mum decided not to keep my foreskin.

703
00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:21,040
Speaker 1: There would have been so much of it because I

704
00:34:21,040 --> 00:34:23,279
Speaker 1: had so much foreskin like a scarf. You could have

705
00:34:23,360 --> 00:34:26,400
Speaker 1: like gone fucking sailing with that thing. Put it on

706
00:34:26,440 --> 00:34:29,120
Speaker 1: a little tinny and you could have fucking sailed to Sydney.

707
00:34:29,760 --> 00:34:32,120
Speaker 1: It's like Sidney to Hobart. Who's that it's the foreskin

708
00:34:32,160 --> 00:34:34,239
Speaker 1: boat again?

709
00:34:35,080 --> 00:34:35,319
Speaker 2: Skin?

710
00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:39,080
Speaker 1: So yeah, So then from that moment on, I was

711
00:34:39,120 --> 00:34:41,920
Speaker 1: then circumcised. So I'm the only one in my family

712
00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:42,760
Speaker 1: of the kids.

713
00:34:42,760 --> 00:34:44,399
Speaker 2: Just the head of your paenis kept colduring winter.

714
00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:49,279
Speaker 1: Sometimes it does. I'm not gonna lie. Apparently we are

715
00:34:49,360 --> 00:34:52,920
Speaker 1: less sensitive, so sex is more enjoyable for those who

716
00:34:52,960 --> 00:34:56,040
Speaker 1: are uncircumcised. But I wouldn't know because I still come

717
00:34:56,040 --> 00:34:56,880
Speaker 1: in like thirty seconds.

718
00:34:58,480 --> 00:35:03,440
Speaker 2: He's pretty enjoyable to me. I had a mate who actually,

719
00:35:03,880 --> 00:35:06,040
Speaker 2: within the last ten years so in his twenties, had

720
00:35:06,040 --> 00:35:09,719
Speaker 2: to get his get circumcised because the girth of his

721
00:35:10,239 --> 00:35:15,560
Speaker 2: penis actually outgrew the skin and it became tight, so tight.

722
00:35:16,080 --> 00:35:18,640
Speaker 1: So he must have been just a massive grower or

723
00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:20,399
Speaker 1: was it like as it was flaccid. It was still

724
00:35:20,400 --> 00:35:20,759
Speaker 1: too big.

725
00:35:20,880 --> 00:35:22,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, like it was becoming really uncomfortable.

726
00:35:22,800 --> 00:35:24,360
Speaker 1: They just like not put like a snip in it

727
00:35:24,400 --> 00:35:24,839
Speaker 1: to like.

728
00:35:25,640 --> 00:35:26,480
Speaker 2: Release the pressure.

729
00:35:28,040 --> 00:35:29,000
Speaker 1: They had to get rid of the whole thing.

730
00:35:29,200 --> 00:35:30,840
Speaker 2: How old was Well, the thing is he had a size.

731
00:35:31,320 --> 00:35:33,080
Speaker 2: He had a size thirty four skins. You need to

732
00:35:33,120 --> 00:35:34,000
Speaker 2: starze thirty two.

733
00:35:39,360 --> 00:35:41,319
Speaker 1: That would be such a good problem to have. So

734
00:35:41,760 --> 00:35:45,080
Speaker 1: your penis are we big? Are we yay of? Are

735
00:35:45,120 --> 00:35:46,080
Speaker 1: we nay? Look?

736
00:35:46,480 --> 00:35:50,480
Speaker 2: You're yay for circumcism? And there's no criticism from me

737
00:35:51,440 --> 00:35:52,759
Speaker 2: because it's each to their own.

738
00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:54,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm for it.

739
00:35:54,400 --> 00:35:57,719
Speaker 2: I have my allegiance with all of my friends are

740
00:35:57,719 --> 00:35:58,520
Speaker 2: circumcised too.

741
00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:01,120
Speaker 1: That I should have asked this question a lot sooner.

742
00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:03,520
Speaker 1: The fact that you're uncircumcised.

743
00:36:03,160 --> 00:36:04,720
Speaker 2: That's what that's why this works.

744
00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:08,520
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, freak.

745
00:36:09,040 --> 00:36:10,640
Speaker 2: I need the length, so I've got an.

746
00:36:10,600 --> 00:36:13,160
Speaker 1: Excuse so it doesn't bother me. It doesn't bother me, Okay.

747
00:36:13,320 --> 00:36:15,080
Speaker 1: To be honest, it's one of those things that I'd say, Laura,

748
00:36:15,120 --> 00:36:15,719
Speaker 1: what do you want to do?

749
00:36:16,160 --> 00:36:16,880
Speaker 2: It'll be up to her.

750
00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:18,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a Laura.

751
00:36:18,360 --> 00:36:19,680
Speaker 2: Question to take one look at and go.

752
00:36:19,719 --> 00:36:23,360
Speaker 1: He needs all the length, Ash That is all we

753
00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:27,400
Speaker 1: have time for anyone out there who's having some issues parenting.

754
00:36:28,320 --> 00:36:30,959
Speaker 1: Maybe they have turned to the professionals, they haven't given

755
00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:33,640
Speaker 1: them a reasonable answer. Come to us, say.

756
00:36:33,640 --> 00:36:36,520
Speaker 2: Getting If they go to professionals, they're getting an educated answer.

757
00:36:36,800 --> 00:36:38,600
Speaker 1: Yes, you want to count to that word.

758
00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:41,200
Speaker 2: Than someone who's educated doesn't have kids trying to give

759
00:36:41,239 --> 00:36:45,280
Speaker 2: you advice. It's one who's uneducated and also has kids

760
00:36:45,680 --> 00:36:46,640
Speaker 2: give you advice.

761
00:36:46,880 --> 00:36:49,680
Speaker 1: Yes, I think it's important if you are making any

762
00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:51,960
Speaker 1: big life decisions with your children, you want to make

763
00:36:51,960 --> 00:36:55,480
Speaker 1: sure you're getting answers from everybody, like family, friends, professional,

764
00:36:55,719 --> 00:36:59,319
Speaker 1: medi j ash. That's that is why, that is why

765
00:36:59,360 --> 00:37:02,480
Speaker 1: we're here. But you can submit any questions on Instagram

766
00:37:02,520 --> 00:37:06,239
Speaker 1: at two Doting Dads, slip into our dms. We'll pick

767
00:37:06,280 --> 00:37:08,920
Speaker 1: out the best ones. Keep it anonymous unless you want

768
00:37:08,920 --> 00:37:09,560
Speaker 1: to shout.

769
00:37:09,280 --> 00:37:13,400
Speaker 2: Out yeah, yeah and look. If you enjoy today's episode,

770
00:37:13,440 --> 00:37:16,120
Speaker 2: please go onto Apple Podcasts, leave a review, leave a

771
00:37:16,200 --> 00:37:19,520
Speaker 2: star rating. Same with Spotify as well. Otherwise, if you

772
00:37:19,560 --> 00:37:21,680
Speaker 2: just want to send us a message picture of your penis.

773
00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 1: Send it.

774
00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:25,400
Speaker 2: If you've got a five skin right now.

775
00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:31,279
Speaker 1: If you're pregnant, send us a photo, give us. We'll

776
00:37:31,320 --> 00:37:32,120
Speaker 1: be posting them all.

777
00:37:34,360 --> 00:37:34,839
Speaker 2: Thank you guys.

778
00:37:35,160 --> 00:37:38,759
Speaker 1: We've ended up recording right now, see you next Verses.

779
00:37:46,080 --> 00:37:49,720
Speaker 1: Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country

780
00:37:49,719 --> 00:37:53,440
Speaker 1: throughout Australia and the connections to land, see and community.

781
00:37:53,680 --> 00:37:56,200
Speaker 2: We pay our respects to their elders past and present

782
00:37:56,239 --> 00:37:59,000
Speaker 2: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres straight

783
00:37:59,080 --> 00:38:03,000
Speaker 2: onto peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land