1 00:00:00,520 --> 00:00:03,800 Speaker 1: Ashon. I want to show you some voice messages. I 2 00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:07,040 Speaker 1: think we've had multiple from the same guy, Dylan Brown on. 3 00:00:07,160 --> 00:00:08,799 Speaker 2: Ida, Dylan Browntown. 4 00:00:09,080 --> 00:00:14,680 Speaker 1: Can I just I'm just gonna I'm just gonna fucking 5 00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:16,279 Speaker 1: play this for you. Listen to that. 6 00:00:25,480 --> 00:00:26,400 Speaker 2: What's he just farting? 7 00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:28,000 Speaker 1: This is the last one? 8 00:00:32,920 --> 00:00:35,760 Speaker 2: Is he just farting into his phone? That's great? 9 00:00:36,040 --> 00:00:38,839 Speaker 1: And just he sent one of the twenty first of 10 00:00:38,920 --> 00:00:45,320 Speaker 1: July one of the twenty second. He sent the last 11 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:48,160 Speaker 1: one yesterday commitment. 12 00:00:48,240 --> 00:00:49,920 Speaker 2: I like it always. 13 00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:53,280 Speaker 1: Around seven or eight o'clock at night, so I'm guessing 14 00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:54,280 Speaker 1: after dinner. 15 00:00:54,240 --> 00:01:10,520 Speaker 2: After dinner, he's just farting into his phone. 16 00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:13,200 Speaker 1: Welcome back to two doting dads. 17 00:01:13,319 --> 00:01:15,600 Speaker 2: I am Maddie Jay and I'm ash This is. 18 00:01:15,560 --> 00:01:17,800 Speaker 1: A podcast that is all about parenting. It's the good, 19 00:01:17,920 --> 00:01:20,440 Speaker 1: the bad, and the relatable. And we have to do 20 00:01:20,600 --> 00:01:24,399 Speaker 1: for legal reasons. Just tell you right now that legal reasons. 21 00:01:24,680 --> 00:01:27,280 Speaker 1: We've been advised for the lawyers to say that if 22 00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:31,160 Speaker 1: there is any information which may seem like advice, it's 23 00:01:31,160 --> 00:01:34,399 Speaker 1: definitely now if you do use any information in this 24 00:01:34,480 --> 00:01:38,760 Speaker 1: podcast for your own personal situation, do so at your 25 00:01:38,760 --> 00:01:39,200 Speaker 1: own risk. 26 00:01:39,319 --> 00:01:43,600 Speaker 2: Absolutely, And before we get started, I do want to say, Matthew, 27 00:01:43,600 --> 00:01:47,520 Speaker 2: I'm very disappointed in you. What is the time. The 28 00:01:47,560 --> 00:01:51,520 Speaker 2: time is now twelve forty five. I have been with 29 00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:55,160 Speaker 2: you for now, for nearly two hours today and you 30 00:01:55,240 --> 00:02:02,400 Speaker 2: have not acknowledged that today, today, to day my friend. Well, 31 00:02:02,880 --> 00:02:06,880 Speaker 2: actually you're not my friend anymore. It's my thirty third 32 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:11,880 Speaker 2: birthday and you've just completely Oh my god, I forgot 33 00:02:12,680 --> 00:02:18,400 Speaker 2: I am and for two hours. I've saved this very moment. 34 00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:20,799 Speaker 2: So this will be our last podcast. 35 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:23,200 Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. 36 00:02:23,240 --> 00:02:26,920 Speaker 2: How fucking dare you? You know me, I'm like a child. 37 00:02:27,120 --> 00:02:30,440 Speaker 2: I need this. This is what you've done to me. 38 00:02:30,960 --> 00:02:31,919 Speaker 1: I apologize. 39 00:02:32,240 --> 00:02:39,200 Speaker 2: You did buy me breakfast, don't nah, there's only do 40 00:02:39,280 --> 00:02:44,400 Speaker 2: I get to decide your punishment? Do I get to 41 00:02:44,400 --> 00:02:48,000 Speaker 2: decide punishment? I want you to clean my car, the 42 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:51,040 Speaker 2: outside of my car in your budget smugglers today after 43 00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:53,280 Speaker 2: this recording. I'm not fucking joking. 44 00:02:53,880 --> 00:02:56,320 Speaker 1: I think I've got a bucket down in the storage 45 00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:59,480 Speaker 1: area which park half out. 46 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:02,040 Speaker 2: Bring it up. I'll bring it right up front and center. 47 00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:04,480 Speaker 2: That'll be my birthday present and your punishment. 48 00:03:04,600 --> 00:03:07,160 Speaker 1: I did have every intention to buy your gift as well. 49 00:03:07,320 --> 00:03:11,239 Speaker 1: I want your are okay, look I am fucking sorry, 50 00:03:11,280 --> 00:03:13,480 Speaker 1: mad I'm sorry. We have been together for a couple 51 00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:13,920 Speaker 1: of hours. 52 00:03:15,160 --> 00:03:18,000 Speaker 2: Have you not checked your Instagram? I thought, there's no 53 00:03:18,320 --> 00:03:20,560 Speaker 2: fucking way I'm going to be able to get onto 54 00:03:20,560 --> 00:03:25,120 Speaker 2: this podcast today and go, guess what you've forgotten. 55 00:03:25,360 --> 00:03:26,440 Speaker 1: I will get you a gift. 56 00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:29,440 Speaker 2: No, I don't want to. All I want from you 57 00:03:29,680 --> 00:03:31,880 Speaker 2: is to clean my car and your budget today. 58 00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:33,200 Speaker 1: Not a problem, you lucky. 59 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:35,280 Speaker 2: It's a nice day. I've given you a beautiful not 60 00:03:35,360 --> 00:03:38,520 Speaker 2: a bad little not a bad day for it. 61 00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:42,400 Speaker 1: So okay, can I just say it needs a wash? 62 00:03:42,440 --> 00:03:43,760 Speaker 2: It's pretty fucked I was liking that. 63 00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:46,640 Speaker 1: In my defense, I've been very busy. 64 00:03:46,880 --> 00:03:47,680 Speaker 2: I don't care. 65 00:03:47,880 --> 00:03:49,160 Speaker 1: It's been a busy couple of days. 66 00:03:49,200 --> 00:03:52,600 Speaker 2: There's nothing I've moved. I'm most important. 67 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:55,320 Speaker 1: Yeah you are. You are the most important person in 68 00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:59,280 Speaker 1: my life right now, father, kids, and Laura. But I've 69 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:03,040 Speaker 1: just moved here. I'm moved out save almost on my own. 70 00:04:03,080 --> 00:04:06,880 Speaker 2: I'd say, yeah, I know. Look I know because you've 71 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,880 Speaker 2: fucking winged winged about it for ages. 72 00:04:10,680 --> 00:04:13,880 Speaker 1: And I also did say, if you watch our social videos, 73 00:04:14,160 --> 00:04:17,000 Speaker 1: you will notice that the great little setup we had 74 00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:19,080 Speaker 1: at the old place with the washing line behind me. 75 00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:20,440 Speaker 2: No, longer. 76 00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:21,440 Speaker 1: It's no longer there. 77 00:04:21,440 --> 00:04:22,479 Speaker 2: You're gonna have to get it back. 78 00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:25,040 Speaker 1: No, I fucking don't even know what that washing line 79 00:04:25,120 --> 00:04:26,520 Speaker 1: is anymore. 80 00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:29,320 Speaker 2: The washing line. You have an inbuilt one. Now you 81 00:04:29,360 --> 00:04:32,080 Speaker 2: have an in built Yeah, it's not a hills hoist though. 82 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:34,160 Speaker 1: It's not. It's not it's it's not the same. 83 00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:36,040 Speaker 2: You can't play gooner fortune on that one. 84 00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:38,440 Speaker 1: But also that one's there's no shade on that one. 85 00:04:38,520 --> 00:04:39,800 Speaker 1: If it's raining, its fucked. 86 00:04:40,600 --> 00:04:41,120 Speaker 2: We wouldn't. 87 00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:45,359 Speaker 1: Yeah, anyway, we have moved. We are no longer in Bronze. 88 00:04:45,920 --> 00:04:49,159 Speaker 1: I've gone back to where it all began, Bondai Beach, 89 00:04:49,440 --> 00:04:53,560 Speaker 1: back in the bubble. He digs North Bond isn't North 90 00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:58,480 Speaker 1: bond We're up this way, sh But we decided ash 91 00:04:58,720 --> 00:05:03,159 Speaker 1: yes to move. Plan is. People think I'm crazy when 92 00:05:03,160 --> 00:05:06,560 Speaker 1: I say this, and it wasn't really. I actually think 93 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:10,120 Speaker 1: Laura was the one who instigated it. My mom. It's 94 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:12,000 Speaker 1: coming on seventy three, maybe seventy four. 95 00:05:12,040 --> 00:05:13,880 Speaker 2: I should probably know it looks much better than that. 96 00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:19,600 Speaker 2: But yeah, she's an avid listener, so that Ellie's gonna 97 00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:19,840 Speaker 2: love that. 98 00:05:19,839 --> 00:05:21,760 Speaker 1: We wanted to get a place where my mom could 99 00:05:21,760 --> 00:05:24,520 Speaker 1: come down and spend more time with the kids. 100 00:05:24,839 --> 00:05:26,200 Speaker 2: You're looking for an in house baby sit. 101 00:05:26,560 --> 00:05:29,520 Speaker 1: That's essentially what we need right now. So we've moved, 102 00:05:29,560 --> 00:05:33,000 Speaker 1: and I just everyone knows that moving house is fucking awful. 103 00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:36,359 Speaker 2: It's up there with one of the worst things ever. 104 00:05:36,760 --> 00:05:39,800 Speaker 2: No one has ever been enthusiastic. You could honestly be 105 00:05:40,120 --> 00:05:44,000 Speaker 2: like buying a fifty million dollar mansion and be like, yeah, 106 00:05:44,440 --> 00:05:46,839 Speaker 2: moving into this mad house, but then moving day you like, 107 00:05:47,160 --> 00:05:48,800 Speaker 2: fuck this, let's just stay well. 108 00:05:49,480 --> 00:05:51,440 Speaker 1: I reckon that people who are buying a fifty million 109 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:53,520 Speaker 1: dollar mansion aren't really lifting a finger. 110 00:05:53,680 --> 00:05:55,840 Speaker 2: I think if I bought a fifty million dollar mansion, 111 00:05:55,839 --> 00:05:58,440 Speaker 2: I would just leave wife and kids there and I 112 00:05:58,440 --> 00:06:02,520 Speaker 2: would just be like, just moving house. I'm moving life now. 113 00:06:03,760 --> 00:06:06,040 Speaker 1: I made the mistake. Though we've booked, we had the 114 00:06:06,080 --> 00:06:08,760 Speaker 1: remove less coming to Wednesday. It just it was it 115 00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:10,440 Speaker 1: made the most sense in terms of like when we 116 00:06:10,480 --> 00:06:12,159 Speaker 1: have to give the keys back to our old rental 117 00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:15,279 Speaker 1: to moving into this place. The Wednesday is when Laura 118 00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:19,200 Speaker 1: does her podcast record, and I was like, that's fine, 119 00:06:19,279 --> 00:06:21,560 Speaker 1: it'll be sweet you do that. I'll look after this. 120 00:06:21,880 --> 00:06:24,799 Speaker 1: Got it dialed. Worst decision I ever made in my life. 121 00:06:25,200 --> 00:06:29,480 Speaker 2: It's a two man jobs. It's fun, it's it is punishing. 122 00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:31,360 Speaker 2: I've been in my place now for a year. But 123 00:06:31,400 --> 00:06:33,560 Speaker 2: like I was saying, I moved from down the road. 124 00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:36,640 Speaker 2: So all I did was just open the boot, launch 125 00:06:36,720 --> 00:06:40,320 Speaker 2: things into the back, no boxes, yeah, and drove up 126 00:06:40,360 --> 00:06:40,719 Speaker 2: the street. 127 00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:43,760 Speaker 1: Didn't have a removeless company. You didn't have any help. No, 128 00:06:44,080 --> 00:06:45,000 Speaker 1: what did you do with your bed? 129 00:06:45,720 --> 00:06:47,680 Speaker 2: They're still there in your bed? 130 00:06:48,120 --> 00:06:50,240 Speaker 1: You just left it the old no no, no, no no. 131 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:54,440 Speaker 2: We just put it on the roof. We did meet. 132 00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:58,080 Speaker 2: I had a mate just help me. We literally it's 133 00:06:58,120 --> 00:07:01,960 Speaker 2: like seven hundred meters ut the road because we hit 134 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:04,240 Speaker 2: a speed bump and dropped it and we had to 135 00:07:04,240 --> 00:07:05,359 Speaker 2: go back for the mat TrEPS. 136 00:07:05,880 --> 00:07:07,919 Speaker 1: You didn't tie it down, nah. 137 00:07:08,880 --> 00:07:10,920 Speaker 2: It was just like we just did mattress on top 138 00:07:10,920 --> 00:07:12,960 Speaker 2: of the roof and then me and a couple of 139 00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:16,360 Speaker 2: boys holding on literally twenty k's an hour up the street. 140 00:07:16,400 --> 00:07:16,960 Speaker 2: That's easy. 141 00:07:17,080 --> 00:07:20,040 Speaker 1: Did anyone like walking on another car look at you 142 00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:21,480 Speaker 1: and think what the fuck is going on? 143 00:07:21,560 --> 00:07:23,440 Speaker 2: Nah? Because I live in a swamp. The people used 144 00:07:23,440 --> 00:07:27,640 Speaker 2: to that's what it's not North Bond, I mate, where 145 00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:29,680 Speaker 2: people would be like, oh, we can't be friends for them, 146 00:07:30,240 --> 00:07:32,880 Speaker 2: I don't afford a tie down. Yeah, so like that 147 00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:34,800 Speaker 2: was just like throw it all in the back of 148 00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:38,080 Speaker 2: the boot or whatever, drive it all up, open the garage, 149 00:07:38,200 --> 00:07:39,480 Speaker 2: launch it back in, and then. 150 00:07:39,480 --> 00:07:40,920 Speaker 1: Just did you have kids at that point? 151 00:07:41,080 --> 00:07:45,440 Speaker 2: This was like a year ago, mate, So yeah, what 152 00:07:45,920 --> 00:07:48,520 Speaker 2: about the that's the arek kindy just got it done. 153 00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:49,800 Speaker 1: Wow for your animal. 154 00:07:50,040 --> 00:07:51,640 Speaker 2: Look, I'm like you, I'm a real man. 155 00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:56,480 Speaker 1: I used to work in events ash and like loading 156 00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:58,480 Speaker 1: up putting pallettes in the back of a truck. That's 157 00:07:58,520 --> 00:07:59,120 Speaker 1: what I did. 158 00:07:59,360 --> 00:08:00,200 Speaker 2: Yeah. 159 00:08:00,240 --> 00:08:04,080 Speaker 1: Look, you know, blood doesn't show his hands. 160 00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:05,560 Speaker 2: They're pen pushing here. 161 00:08:05,720 --> 00:08:08,640 Speaker 1: Good to write emails. But I was on the back 162 00:08:08,680 --> 00:08:11,360 Speaker 1: of the bed frame with the fucking boys. Yeah, loading 163 00:08:11,440 --> 00:08:11,920 Speaker 1: up the truck. 164 00:08:12,320 --> 00:08:14,640 Speaker 2: We're on the back of the bed frame with the boys. 165 00:08:14,760 --> 00:08:17,480 Speaker 1: All right, boom boom, get in. 166 00:08:17,600 --> 00:08:20,320 Speaker 2: All we did was boom, boom boom, just put it in. 167 00:08:20,640 --> 00:08:22,600 Speaker 1: I don't know if they appreciated my help or not. 168 00:08:22,680 --> 00:08:24,320 Speaker 2: Do you know what? There's probably this inside joke for 169 00:08:24,400 --> 00:08:26,840 Speaker 2: removal lists that are like the homebone is that try 170 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:28,880 Speaker 2: homemooneer is out of here trying. It's kind of like 171 00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:31,480 Speaker 2: when you have like a handyman in and there's always 172 00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:33,720 Speaker 2: that like over the shoulder, over the shoulder, what are 173 00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:36,160 Speaker 2: you doing now? There? They're probably just like fucking here 174 00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:38,200 Speaker 2: the fucking they loved it. They'd be calling your uncle. 175 00:08:38,480 --> 00:08:40,000 Speaker 2: I loved it his uncle. 176 00:08:40,280 --> 00:08:44,640 Speaker 1: We stopped for lunch, had smoko. I was like, good day, boys, Hey. 177 00:08:44,920 --> 00:08:47,319 Speaker 2: You guys got I've got to have roll and a 178 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,800 Speaker 2: shocking milk and a sticky when I. 179 00:08:49,760 --> 00:08:52,079 Speaker 1: Talk like this normally, and then when I'm with the boys. 180 00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:52,480 Speaker 2: You bug it on. 181 00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:54,320 Speaker 1: I was like, I reckon, we try and lift the 182 00:08:54,320 --> 00:08:55,080 Speaker 1: barber after this. 183 00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:58,800 Speaker 2: And then your daughter walks in. You're like, daddy's here, Daddy, 184 00:08:58,840 --> 00:09:02,520 Speaker 2: It's okay. You're hungry, You're hungry, sleepy. 185 00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:05,920 Speaker 1: And then did the boys. I was like, here you 186 00:09:06,040 --> 00:09:09,200 Speaker 1: go on, where's the job site tomorrow? 187 00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:10,480 Speaker 2: Where's the next move? 188 00:09:10,559 --> 00:09:11,920 Speaker 1: What? Fuck you? 189 00:09:12,320 --> 00:09:14,600 Speaker 2: Every man does it if you're not a trade And 190 00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:16,120 Speaker 2: then all of a sudden, you're around a trading for 191 00:09:16,160 --> 00:09:19,600 Speaker 2: ten seconds, you turn into like someone else. 192 00:09:19,840 --> 00:09:22,160 Speaker 1: Was Nick who was in charge of the removed Nicko. 193 00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:25,959 Speaker 1: He was yet he was proper blue collar, great guy, 194 00:09:26,240 --> 00:09:30,880 Speaker 1: great guy issue though, she'll be right. He connected the 195 00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:33,280 Speaker 1: washing machine the pipes and you go pipe from the 196 00:09:33,360 --> 00:09:36,000 Speaker 1: washer to the hose taph He screwed one side on 197 00:09:36,679 --> 00:09:38,520 Speaker 1: and then he goes, it's too short. You're gonna need 198 00:09:38,520 --> 00:09:39,679 Speaker 1: a bit of a longer one. He's got out of 199 00:09:39,679 --> 00:09:42,280 Speaker 1: Bunnings you buy two meter hose and I was like, yeah, yeah, 200 00:09:42,440 --> 00:09:43,160 Speaker 1: I don't know what you mean. 201 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:44,840 Speaker 2: What do you mean like the you know, the bloody 202 00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:47,040 Speaker 2: wooha down the blue, bloody white thing. 203 00:09:47,640 --> 00:09:50,319 Speaker 1: So I've gone to Bunnings picked up the hose. Also 204 00:09:50,360 --> 00:09:53,040 Speaker 1: felt pretty mainly being in Bunnings with a hose and hands. 205 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:55,800 Speaker 2: Just reminds me of just before you go on you probab. 206 00:09:55,800 --> 00:09:57,560 Speaker 2: Wouldn't say it because I haven't watched Park in rec 207 00:09:57,920 --> 00:10:01,800 Speaker 2: where Ron Swanson's walking through like the bunny and they're 208 00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:03,160 Speaker 2: like you need helps her and he's like, I know 209 00:10:03,280 --> 00:10:06,160 Speaker 2: more than you. I picture that. 210 00:10:06,559 --> 00:10:12,240 Speaker 1: It was the opposite. I was like, help help me, 211 00:10:12,559 --> 00:10:18,120 Speaker 1: I'm the last breckon nail. But I got out the pipe, 212 00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:20,959 Speaker 1: came home, went to unscrew the pipe because it was 213 00:10:20,960 --> 00:10:24,280 Speaker 1: connected to one end to the mains. Couldn't unscrew it. 214 00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:28,240 Speaker 2: Oh, not manly enough, I had to message Nico're just 215 00:10:28,280 --> 00:10:30,880 Speaker 2: like manly vocals around the boys, but as soon as 216 00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:33,199 Speaker 2: it comes to untaking your tap, you're like fuck. 217 00:10:34,120 --> 00:10:38,080 Speaker 1: I had to message Nico and be like, is there 218 00:10:38,120 --> 00:10:41,079 Speaker 1: like a little secret to one doing this? And he's like, MA, Lefty, Lucy, 219 00:10:43,240 --> 00:10:44,560 Speaker 1: you couldn't fucking do it either. 220 00:10:44,559 --> 00:10:46,280 Speaker 2: I know, I know, So we have to get Laura 221 00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:49,840 Speaker 2: in to do it. Aprilil come around, She'll do it. 222 00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:53,360 Speaker 1: And the only thing that really sucked was we had 223 00:10:53,360 --> 00:10:56,360 Speaker 1: an inflatable pool from Kmart that was sitting. 224 00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:59,960 Speaker 2: And I remember it was the mosquito breathing around like it. 225 00:10:59,880 --> 00:11:04,480 Speaker 1: Was full of dangy fever, thnky fever, thanky fever. 226 00:11:04,600 --> 00:11:07,240 Speaker 2: You had your own swamp I live in at the 227 00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:07,840 Speaker 2: back of your house. 228 00:11:08,200 --> 00:11:10,280 Speaker 1: So we got rid of the inflatable pool and the 229 00:11:10,360 --> 00:11:12,560 Speaker 1: tiles are like black, and I was like, I really 230 00:11:12,640 --> 00:11:15,199 Speaker 1: want to get the bond back, Like screw it, I'm 231 00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:19,040 Speaker 1: going to get the gurnie out. Started gurnying and I 232 00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:21,000 Speaker 1: now know that I didn't have the right attachment, so 233 00:11:21,120 --> 00:11:23,760 Speaker 1: like maybe like about as wide as your finger, that's 234 00:11:23,760 --> 00:11:25,880 Speaker 1: how wide the pressure, So imagine it's like it's almost 235 00:11:25,880 --> 00:11:28,560 Speaker 1: like a nickeo. I was doing these papers with this 236 00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:31,400 Speaker 1: little attachment. I now know you can get like a proper. 237 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, big like round thing that just goes. 238 00:11:34,240 --> 00:11:37,319 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, and I finished two hours in. I kind 239 00:11:37,320 --> 00:11:38,840 Speaker 1: of stood back to admire my work. 240 00:11:38,920 --> 00:11:40,160 Speaker 2: How are you four arms today? 241 00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:42,840 Speaker 1: Okay? You know what I also did? 242 00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:47,920 Speaker 2: You tried to have a wang and you couldn't. Oh 243 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:49,360 Speaker 2: it's too soret. 244 00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:54,240 Speaker 1: The hose attachment because it was really old. It kept 245 00:11:54,320 --> 00:11:57,440 Speaker 1: popping off catcher. So you're plugging the hose. So anyone 246 00:11:57,440 --> 00:11:59,920 Speaker 1: who who hasn't gurnied before you get the garden hose 247 00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:02,520 Speaker 1: plug it into the unit and it kept popping out. 248 00:12:02,559 --> 00:12:05,400 Speaker 1: So I had to kind of hold in that. Going 249 00:12:05,480 --> 00:12:07,360 Speaker 1: in with the other with this little head that was 250 00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:11,000 Speaker 1: like five centimeters wide, doing a huge back patio took 251 00:12:11,040 --> 00:12:12,760 Speaker 1: me hours. 252 00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:16,160 Speaker 2: Know, you were actually offline for so long trying to 253 00:12:16,160 --> 00:12:18,280 Speaker 2: get hold of you. I even had a nap, but 254 00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:20,559 Speaker 2: I did all sorts of things trying to get nothing 255 00:12:20,600 --> 00:12:21,959 Speaker 2: from you, and I was like, what the fuck is 256 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:22,640 Speaker 2: this guy doing? 257 00:12:22,760 --> 00:12:25,520 Speaker 1: I finished, and I look back at the patio and 258 00:12:25,559 --> 00:12:30,040 Speaker 1: it's like it looks like ship it still it looks 259 00:12:30,080 --> 00:12:32,680 Speaker 1: so average, still black. And people were like, oh, you 260 00:12:32,720 --> 00:12:35,680 Speaker 1: have to use an acid wash now, yeah, probably, I. 261 00:12:35,679 --> 00:12:40,080 Speaker 2: Don't know, bring your fucking removals. Your best friend Nick 262 00:12:40,480 --> 00:12:43,079 Speaker 2: help like, yeah, you need to mash oh yeah, in 263 00:12:43,120 --> 00:12:44,120 Speaker 2: a bloody acid wash. 264 00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:45,960 Speaker 1: That's right. I drink that on a front. 265 00:12:47,840 --> 00:12:48,440 Speaker 2: That for smoke. 266 00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:54,319 Speaker 1: Nick, if you're listening, thank you for your help. Anyway. 267 00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,800 Speaker 2: Anyway, here's that payment. Was it just a quick shout 268 00:12:56,800 --> 00:13:00,640 Speaker 2: out onto that I mean in fluent. 269 00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:02,920 Speaker 1: Flu a content creator? Thank you very much. But mate, 270 00:13:03,120 --> 00:13:04,560 Speaker 1: we're here in the new house. 271 00:13:04,720 --> 00:13:08,559 Speaker 2: It starts, thank you. I'm looking for defects. Oh, we 272 00:13:08,679 --> 00:13:13,720 Speaker 2: found the creaky floorboard. Where is there? Oh yeah, sounds 273 00:13:13,760 --> 00:13:17,000 Speaker 2: like a fart. Sounds like brown Town, sounds like Dylan Brown. 274 00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:22,040 Speaker 2: You sound like you've had a great week. I just 275 00:13:22,040 --> 00:13:24,080 Speaker 2: want to give you a quick little insight to her. 276 00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:28,240 Speaker 2: How my week has been. April very sick over the weekend. 277 00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:29,800 Speaker 1: Yeah, sorry, how is she? 278 00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:33,200 Speaker 2: She's okay, now she's well, she's actually not still not great. 279 00:13:33,440 --> 00:13:34,280 Speaker 1: What was it? Do I know? 280 00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:38,320 Speaker 2: I think it's just this influenza that's going around. I 281 00:13:38,320 --> 00:13:42,360 Speaker 2: don't know. Again, not a doctor, not a doctor, just 282 00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:43,280 Speaker 2: to guess. I was like. 283 00:13:45,600 --> 00:13:47,880 Speaker 1: Finger in the bumpy that is chlamydia. 284 00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:51,760 Speaker 2: Oh, yes, a little bit warm up there. And Macy's 285 00:13:51,760 --> 00:13:53,440 Speaker 2: had conjunctivitors this week. 286 00:13:53,760 --> 00:13:55,920 Speaker 1: We were on the phone together when you were like, oh, ship, 287 00:13:56,240 --> 00:13:57,000 Speaker 1: Candy's calling me. 288 00:13:57,679 --> 00:14:01,160 Speaker 2: The worst call. Someone actually dmd us as well, saying like, 289 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:04,600 Speaker 2: is it the worst when that happens? It's been over 290 00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:07,160 Speaker 2: it a few times. I think it's kind of like one, 291 00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:08,880 Speaker 2: you've got to stop what you're doing too, you've got 292 00:14:08,920 --> 00:14:10,280 Speaker 2: to go pick him up, and three still got to 293 00:14:10,320 --> 00:14:11,080 Speaker 2: pay for it. 294 00:14:10,920 --> 00:14:13,040 Speaker 1: With that phone call when they say you've got to 295 00:14:13,040 --> 00:14:14,920 Speaker 1: pick them up? Have you ever been like I can't 296 00:14:15,320 --> 00:14:19,120 Speaker 1: just nah, leam out the front they're working out. I'm good, 297 00:14:19,240 --> 00:14:22,040 Speaker 1: I'm good. I've always been in a situation where I'm 298 00:14:22,080 --> 00:14:24,320 Speaker 1: like this around the corner or working from home. But 299 00:14:24,440 --> 00:14:26,600 Speaker 1: what can you just can you just say? 300 00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:28,320 Speaker 2: I don't know. I think they just call like the 301 00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:31,480 Speaker 2: third person, so they'd call for me. They called April 302 00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:33,440 Speaker 2: called me. Then they call pop Up because the pop 303 00:14:33,520 --> 00:14:35,120 Speaker 2: Up picked him up all the time, and Papa would 304 00:14:35,120 --> 00:14:35,440 Speaker 2: just say. 305 00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:39,000 Speaker 1: Yep, Poppa, he is good. He has got April's dad. Yeah, 306 00:14:39,200 --> 00:14:40,040 Speaker 1: shout out to Popper. 307 00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:42,920 Speaker 2: Yeah. Anyways, everyone's sick. Everyone sick in your everyone's sick 308 00:14:42,920 --> 00:14:45,320 Speaker 2: in my hand. Have you been seeing you? 309 00:14:46,560 --> 00:14:49,280 Speaker 1: It takes a lot to knock down big Old Ashton. 310 00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:54,720 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I reckon. I had about ten hours sleeping, 311 00:14:54,840 --> 00:14:57,840 Speaker 2: like the four days of last week everyone. 312 00:14:57,560 --> 00:15:01,040 Speaker 1: Oh you're such a god, you're a here. 313 00:15:01,160 --> 00:15:03,760 Speaker 2: Big nights out. I went to the Matilda's go. 314 00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:05,920 Speaker 1: Wait. I thought, you're gonna say, because you've been looking 315 00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:10,160 Speaker 1: after the kids and nah, you've been going out getting pissed. 316 00:15:10,200 --> 00:15:11,840 Speaker 2: Yeah. I went to the Matilda's game. It was great. 317 00:15:11,920 --> 00:15:12,480 Speaker 1: How was that? 318 00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:15,040 Speaker 2: The atmosphere was amazing. One thing I didn't like about 319 00:15:15,040 --> 00:15:17,760 Speaker 2: it though, is far too many puffa jackets. It was 320 00:15:17,840 --> 00:15:20,320 Speaker 2: just a sea of puffer jack and you know what, 321 00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:23,400 Speaker 2: seventy five thousand people. They could have fit double in 322 00:15:23,400 --> 00:15:27,640 Speaker 2: that if people they said it was like wall to 323 00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:31,880 Speaker 2: wall gortex, like George Costanza, like they're stuck in this seat. 324 00:15:31,920 --> 00:15:35,400 Speaker 1: But it was all for a puffer jacket. 325 00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:38,800 Speaker 2: That's like, I belong with my people sleeping bag. I 326 00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:40,880 Speaker 2: can tell I was like a bunch of people walking 327 00:15:40,880 --> 00:15:42,440 Speaker 2: around in their sleeping bag. It's ridiculous. 328 00:15:42,480 --> 00:15:43,120 Speaker 1: Just that love like. 329 00:15:44,680 --> 00:15:47,400 Speaker 2: Walking down makes me sick. 330 00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:49,560 Speaker 1: What do you wear if you don't wear a puffer jacket? 331 00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:51,040 Speaker 2: Absolutely anything? 332 00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:51,680 Speaker 1: What is that? 333 00:15:51,720 --> 00:15:54,040 Speaker 2: I'd wear a fucking burlap sack. 334 00:15:55,040 --> 00:15:57,800 Speaker 1: Two things that you wear a potato sack that don't 335 00:15:57,800 --> 00:16:00,560 Speaker 1: make any sense because they're very practical and being a 336 00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:04,040 Speaker 1: dad is all about being practical. Crocs and puffa jackets. 337 00:16:04,040 --> 00:16:06,480 Speaker 1: I hate them both, two things that you were fighting 338 00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:07,600 Speaker 1: way too hard. 339 00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:08,720 Speaker 2: Just won't do it. 340 00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:13,520 Speaker 1: Go with the tide. Come and join us. Please, When 341 00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:16,000 Speaker 1: you finally start wearing crocks and a puffer jacket, we 342 00:16:16,040 --> 00:16:20,720 Speaker 1: will all be there standing outside your house being like, oh, 343 00:16:20,840 --> 00:16:23,960 Speaker 1: no of us. 344 00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:25,520 Speaker 2: I fucking hope that day. 345 00:16:26,160 --> 00:16:29,240 Speaker 1: It's gonna happen. It's not a question of if, it's 346 00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:30,080 Speaker 1: a question of when. 347 00:16:30,360 --> 00:16:31,800 Speaker 2: It's not going to happen. I promise you that. 348 00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:35,840 Speaker 1: And you were sitting right next to Hammich Blake the soccer. 349 00:16:35,760 --> 00:16:36,720 Speaker 2: I wasn't far from him. 350 00:16:36,720 --> 00:16:37,360 Speaker 1: Did you see him? 351 00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:40,680 Speaker 2: No? I saw Jim Jeffries. You tell me with the 352 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:45,440 Speaker 2: alumni of comedy just in the comedic bar. 353 00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:46,640 Speaker 1: What are you doing in there? 354 00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:48,880 Speaker 2: I don't worry about it. Nah. It was actually just 355 00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:51,920 Speaker 2: general admission. That was just jah really yeah, yeah, yeah, 356 00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:54,080 Speaker 2: So I went. I went with a female soccer team. 357 00:16:54,160 --> 00:16:54,680 Speaker 2: Long story. 358 00:16:54,720 --> 00:16:57,600 Speaker 1: We can we just say for a second, I get around. 359 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:04,320 Speaker 1: Not many people know this about you, Ash you were 360 00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:10,359 Speaker 1: previously I would say, a semi professional. That's that's not 361 00:17:10,359 --> 00:17:11,840 Speaker 1: even I'm not even trying to be funny here. 362 00:17:12,640 --> 00:17:13,240 Speaker 2: I was not. 363 00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:16,080 Speaker 1: I wasn't who'd you play for? What was it? Tweed River? 364 00:17:17,040 --> 00:17:17,520 Speaker 2: Tweed River? 365 00:17:17,600 --> 00:17:19,520 Speaker 1: Crabs? What was it? Who were they? 366 00:17:20,119 --> 00:17:21,160 Speaker 2: The cuts and crabs? 367 00:17:21,600 --> 00:17:22,639 Speaker 1: What was your team called? 368 00:17:22,840 --> 00:17:24,879 Speaker 2: It was for far North Coast, New South Wales? That 369 00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:26,280 Speaker 2: was what was you? Like? 370 00:17:26,359 --> 00:17:27,080 Speaker 1: What was your animal? 371 00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:30,600 Speaker 2: I don't remember, I remember anyway, Can I get back 372 00:17:30,600 --> 00:17:32,359 Speaker 2: to my story or do you want to go on 373 00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:38,480 Speaker 2: about it? Anyway? So Macy's been off sick now the 374 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:41,240 Speaker 2: other day it's been quite nice, warm weather. There was 375 00:17:41,240 --> 00:17:43,879 Speaker 2: a couple of rainy days there. But on Macy's change 376 00:17:43,920 --> 00:17:47,479 Speaker 2: table there's a couple of drawers underneath, great perfect nappies 377 00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:50,440 Speaker 2: in there, everything you need. So Macy did really big ship. 378 00:17:50,960 --> 00:17:54,560 Speaker 2: I'm talking a fucking room clearer. Someone will walk into 379 00:17:54,560 --> 00:17:59,160 Speaker 2: that and go, whoa, that is strong, That is pludget. Yeah, absolutely, 380 00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:01,720 Speaker 2: it was thick. Anyway, She's done this big poo and 381 00:18:01,760 --> 00:18:04,640 Speaker 2: I've wrapped it up. Okay, I haven't bagged it yet, 382 00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:07,399 Speaker 2: wrapped it up and I've just put it in like 383 00:18:07,440 --> 00:18:09,639 Speaker 2: the drawer was open. I'm just I'm just popping it down, okay, 384 00:18:09,760 --> 00:18:11,120 Speaker 2: just for a sec. Well, I got a new one 385 00:18:11,160 --> 00:18:13,200 Speaker 2: out in the drawer. Yeah, just in the drawer there 386 00:18:13,240 --> 00:18:15,040 Speaker 2: like that got a new nappy right next to where 387 00:18:15,080 --> 00:18:17,040 Speaker 2: I did it, wrapped her up with a new nappy, 388 00:18:17,080 --> 00:18:20,320 Speaker 2: got a dressed, and I've just got up, closed the 389 00:18:20,359 --> 00:18:21,240 Speaker 2: drawer and left. 390 00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:25,119 Speaker 1: Yeah, I've forgotten. 391 00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:28,879 Speaker 2: I've forgotten what happened there anyway, because you focused on 392 00:18:28,880 --> 00:18:31,679 Speaker 2: the kid. Yep, yep. So this is her room in 393 00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:37,800 Speaker 2: during the day, faces the sun. So we're out all day, 394 00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:44,280 Speaker 2: all day, like the sun is just beaming. Thankfully it's winter. 395 00:18:44,359 --> 00:18:47,879 Speaker 2: Imagine it was summer beaming down on this drawer. 396 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:49,080 Speaker 1: Like a mini kiln. 397 00:18:49,280 --> 00:18:56,800 Speaker 2: Like it was just like like the death ray. And anyway, 398 00:18:56,880 --> 00:18:59,679 Speaker 2: so I'm out cooking, I'm out. April has been in 399 00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:00,520 Speaker 2: bed all day. 400 00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:02,960 Speaker 1: April's at home sick. 401 00:19:03,359 --> 00:19:05,520 Speaker 2: Sick, but she's in the other room she's been in. 402 00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:08,919 Speaker 2: She's I've never seen that bedridden. So we eventually we 403 00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:13,280 Speaker 2: come home, have bath or whatever for bedtime, and I 404 00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:15,240 Speaker 2: take her into a room to get dressed, the change table, 405 00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:18,640 Speaker 2: and I opened that drawer. It was already a room clearer. 406 00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:23,320 Speaker 2: Open the drawer and it just about punched me in 407 00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:27,320 Speaker 2: the face. I've left a nappy baking in the sun 408 00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:29,400 Speaker 2: for eight hours. 409 00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:36,800 Speaker 1: And I was like, I was like four my eyes, 410 00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:41,280 Speaker 1: your clothing just disintegrates. 411 00:19:41,440 --> 00:19:44,600 Speaker 2: I was just like, everyone needs a bath again, Oh 412 00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:47,480 Speaker 2: my god. And it was just like pain has been 413 00:19:47,600 --> 00:19:50,760 Speaker 2: ripped in bed and she just hears me going, oh, 414 00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:54,280 Speaker 2: She's like what, and I told her what I did. 415 00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:57,480 Speaker 2: It was honestly the most putrid thing I had. 416 00:19:57,640 --> 00:20:00,399 Speaker 1: The neighbors must have thought someone had, you know, fallen 417 00:20:00,960 --> 00:20:05,040 Speaker 1: like got nil ill and been there for like ten bar. 418 00:20:06,240 --> 00:20:08,600 Speaker 2: It was like like when you you know, when you're 419 00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,679 Speaker 2: like walking down like a bush trail or something, you 420 00:20:10,720 --> 00:20:14,280 Speaker 2: smell a dead animal. Yes, that's what it was like. 421 00:20:14,359 --> 00:20:17,480 Speaker 2: But I didn't come out until it's like they've made 422 00:20:17,560 --> 00:20:21,440 Speaker 2: the drawers to vacuum seal. The freshness in the house 423 00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:25,359 Speaker 2: still sinks. It's just baked its way into the top drawer. 424 00:20:25,640 --> 00:20:27,000 Speaker 2: You know when you have those things that you just 425 00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:29,600 Speaker 2: cannot clean to get the smell. That's what the top 426 00:20:29,640 --> 00:20:30,320 Speaker 2: draw smells like. 427 00:20:30,359 --> 00:20:32,480 Speaker 1: Now you just is every window open in the. 428 00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:37,520 Speaker 2: House, everything's open, the ceiling off to air the fucking 429 00:20:37,600 --> 00:20:39,959 Speaker 2: room out. Anyway. I feel so amazy because she had 430 00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:40,800 Speaker 2: to sleep in it. 431 00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:47,280 Speaker 1: Poor little girl. Husky daddy, please you've done this yourself. 432 00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:52,159 Speaker 2: Get in there, so Matthew. Last week I told a 433 00:20:52,160 --> 00:20:54,200 Speaker 2: story about a friend of mine who had a really 434 00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:58,760 Speaker 2: really bad gift from his dad, so his daughter's grandfather. 435 00:20:59,160 --> 00:21:01,600 Speaker 2: It was a jacket, turned out to be a dog's jacket. 436 00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:04,800 Speaker 2: I told him that I told this story. Had hec 437 00:21:04,880 --> 00:21:07,520 Speaker 2: and I was like, he said, I heard it. You 438 00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:10,000 Speaker 2: told it much better if I tell it. It's just sad. 439 00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:16,840 Speaker 2: So anyway, we received a few dms, but. 440 00:21:16,880 --> 00:21:18,200 Speaker 1: I put the call out there for anyone. 441 00:21:18,280 --> 00:21:21,080 Speaker 2: Well, even before I put the call out there, it 442 00:21:21,160 --> 00:21:23,760 Speaker 2: sounds a good one from taking. So her father in 443 00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:27,720 Speaker 2: law gave her son twenty dollars for his birthday. He 444 00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:29,720 Speaker 2: later took the money home with him because the son 445 00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:30,600 Speaker 2: kept leaving it on. 446 00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:35,960 Speaker 1: The floor, just like twenty on its own. Must have 447 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:37,240 Speaker 1: been a twenty little lobster. 448 00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:38,600 Speaker 2: Must have been a little lobster. 449 00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:41,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, hey, it could be worse. You could be giving 450 00:21:42,320 --> 00:21:44,520 Speaker 1: nothing to your good mate on his birthday. 451 00:21:45,640 --> 00:21:47,160 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, but you're going to clean my cast. 452 00:21:47,280 --> 00:21:51,280 Speaker 1: Did you time this segment specifically on your birthday knowing 453 00:21:51,320 --> 00:21:52,840 Speaker 1: that I would forget your birthday present? 454 00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:55,040 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, and it's clinical like that. This is all 455 00:21:55,200 --> 00:21:57,800 Speaker 2: just I've been working on this for months. 456 00:21:57,600 --> 00:22:00,840 Speaker 1: It's to make me feel even more shit, not exhausted 457 00:22:00,840 --> 00:22:02,919 Speaker 1: from the house move. Is that why you put this together? 458 00:22:03,040 --> 00:22:06,640 Speaker 2: Yeah? Absolutely. Anyway, we'll come back to that. I've got 459 00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:09,600 Speaker 2: further punishments for you. So here's another one from Just 460 00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:11,240 Speaker 2: Get This renamed Nicki Webster. 461 00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:13,679 Speaker 1: No, it's not the Nicky webinar. 462 00:22:13,880 --> 00:22:14,359 Speaker 2: I can't be. 463 00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:15,639 Speaker 1: It could be with a photo. 464 00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:19,919 Speaker 2: There's no photo screenshot it. Anyway, Nicky says, my uncle 465 00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:22,239 Speaker 2: would save his Happy Meals toys and give it to 466 00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:26,080 Speaker 2: us for our birthdays. I think that's I like it. 467 00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:28,879 Speaker 1: That's I mean, pretty stingy. 468 00:22:29,400 --> 00:22:30,880 Speaker 2: I'm all for the stinge. 469 00:22:31,359 --> 00:22:32,600 Speaker 1: But kids love that shit. 470 00:22:32,800 --> 00:22:36,560 Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, look there's ship presents bo aren't they. This 471 00:22:36,640 --> 00:22:40,360 Speaker 2: one is my life. H My kids are one year 472 00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:43,400 Speaker 2: old and he got a rebound soccer net. He can't 473 00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:44,160 Speaker 2: even walk. 474 00:22:47,080 --> 00:22:47,600 Speaker 1: For a second. 475 00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:49,240 Speaker 2: I was like, that's a good and there's a lot 476 00:22:49,280 --> 00:22:51,880 Speaker 2: of really stupid grandparents. 477 00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:53,520 Speaker 1: That's going to be a real gift. 478 00:22:53,760 --> 00:22:56,800 Speaker 2: No one's going on surely, or they're probably thinking, like 479 00:22:57,119 --> 00:22:59,160 Speaker 2: by the time of his second birthday, might be walking, 480 00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:02,600 Speaker 2: might be a rebound. Is like, that's like, that's like training. 481 00:23:02,680 --> 00:23:03,159 Speaker 2: You've got to be. 482 00:23:03,359 --> 00:23:05,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, as I said professional, you later grew up. 483 00:23:05,840 --> 00:23:06,879 Speaker 2: To be Ronaldo. 484 00:23:08,040 --> 00:23:09,000 Speaker 1: You got to start a mountain. 485 00:23:09,040 --> 00:23:11,800 Speaker 2: You do. Yeah, it's like Don Bradman with the ping pong. 486 00:23:11,680 --> 00:23:16,560 Speaker 1: Or the golf whatever he cares look. 487 00:23:16,440 --> 00:23:18,439 Speaker 2: Keep sending your presence, you know, like that. I like 488 00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:19,960 Speaker 2: to see that. There's another one there. I was going 489 00:23:20,040 --> 00:23:22,919 Speaker 2: to read, which was someone gift to their grandson a 490 00:23:23,000 --> 00:23:27,160 Speaker 2: nature sensory kit which had like, what's that? Exactly what's that? 491 00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:34,399 Speaker 2: It was just a tin with sticks, pine cones and leaves. 492 00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:38,280 Speaker 1: I was thinking, Oh, that's a great gift. Marley might 493 00:23:38,400 --> 00:23:38,600 Speaker 1: like that. 494 00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:40,560 Speaker 2: Well, again, you can just go out the back there, 495 00:23:41,080 --> 00:23:44,840 Speaker 2: just pick a few of those plants, gilo tin straight 496 00:23:44,880 --> 00:23:49,000 Speaker 2: in there, a couple of pine cones. That'll show them. 497 00:23:49,359 --> 00:23:52,439 Speaker 1: Hey, before we go into your favorite segment. When we 498 00:23:52,480 --> 00:23:55,800 Speaker 1: did the last episode in between, i've been to the snow. 499 00:23:56,080 --> 00:23:59,760 Speaker 1: I do recall y Ash and sorry because I know 500 00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:02,120 Speaker 1: we're also at some point we did speak about going 501 00:24:02,119 --> 00:24:03,200 Speaker 1: to the snow together. 502 00:24:03,760 --> 00:24:05,679 Speaker 2: Well, once you found out that I've never stoneboard, you 503 00:24:05,680 --> 00:24:07,399 Speaker 2: could crop me like a fucking meat pie. 504 00:24:07,480 --> 00:24:10,840 Speaker 1: You can appreciate that, No, I can't. Okay, Well, people 505 00:24:10,880 --> 00:24:13,359 Speaker 1: who have been to the snow, if they have a 506 00:24:13,359 --> 00:24:14,800 Speaker 1: friend who's never been to the snow. 507 00:24:14,800 --> 00:24:16,840 Speaker 2: It's not that I haven't been to the snow. It's 508 00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:18,359 Speaker 2: not like I'm going to be like, what's this white 509 00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:23,960 Speaker 2: cold stuff? It sounded like Mickey out, Oh my god, you've. 510 00:24:23,840 --> 00:24:27,320 Speaker 1: Never been when you've had some, when you've had some 511 00:24:27,359 --> 00:24:30,080 Speaker 1: snow experience under your belt, I will then take you 512 00:24:30,119 --> 00:24:30,560 Speaker 1: to the snow. 513 00:24:30,760 --> 00:24:33,760 Speaker 2: I'm not going. This is why, because you snow. People 514 00:24:34,240 --> 00:24:36,679 Speaker 2: think it's a fucking privilege. 515 00:24:37,280 --> 00:24:41,119 Speaker 1: Like we're a different race. How do you segregate us 516 00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:43,840 Speaker 1: like that in BONDI going to the snow with a 517 00:24:43,880 --> 00:24:44,480 Speaker 1: puffer jacket. 518 00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:50,359 Speaker 2: Why don't you be fucking original for once. I'm just hurt. 519 00:24:50,520 --> 00:24:52,520 Speaker 1: If you want your car wash, you're going the wrong 520 00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:53,159 Speaker 1: way about it. 521 00:24:53,440 --> 00:24:55,680 Speaker 2: You washed it. Make it so we went to the snow. 522 00:24:55,720 --> 00:24:57,359 Speaker 2: Either that or I get Marley to get when she 523 00:24:57,400 --> 00:24:59,000 Speaker 2: gets home, she's going to get out there and wash it. 524 00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:02,399 Speaker 1: She's got cars. You know that. The debate was before 525 00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:05,879 Speaker 1: we went, obviously understood that you were not coming. That 526 00:25:06,040 --> 00:25:10,240 Speaker 1: was identified. But then I was thinking do I bring 527 00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:13,320 Speaker 1: my kids with me? Like? Do I bring Marley's four? 528 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:17,040 Speaker 1: That means she's just old enough for the youngest you 529 00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:18,280 Speaker 1: have to be is four years old to. 530 00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:19,840 Speaker 2: Be part of it. 531 00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:21,520 Speaker 1: Take wine. But then I was like, what the fuck, 532 00:25:21,560 --> 00:25:23,800 Speaker 1: what do I do with Lola? Do I? I couldn't 533 00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:24,359 Speaker 1: find a babysit. 534 00:25:24,560 --> 00:25:27,240 Speaker 2: Do we do a buster just tied to a pole 535 00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:28,320 Speaker 2: and leave her a bowl foot. 536 00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:32,520 Speaker 1: You can get babysitters down there. But then I was like, 537 00:25:32,640 --> 00:25:36,280 Speaker 1: Lola's going to flip out if we're all getting ready 538 00:25:36,320 --> 00:25:37,840 Speaker 1: and we're heading out the door and she's got to 539 00:25:37,920 --> 00:25:38,880 Speaker 1: stay in the. 540 00:25:38,840 --> 00:25:40,640 Speaker 2: Year because she's old enough to know now. 541 00:25:40,680 --> 00:25:43,240 Speaker 1: That she's missing out. And then like it's it actually 542 00:25:43,240 --> 00:25:45,040 Speaker 1: was a lot warm. It's fucking warm down there at 543 00:25:45,040 --> 00:25:47,040 Speaker 1: the moment. It was like ten degrees where we were 544 00:25:47,359 --> 00:25:49,000 Speaker 1: so like she could have played outside, but we thought 545 00:25:49,040 --> 00:25:51,760 Speaker 1: we don't want to be crammed in all day by yourself. 546 00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:55,840 Speaker 1: Got to the snow, saw the snow, and I was 547 00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:58,399 Speaker 1: just thinking to myself, Oh, the kids were loved it here, 548 00:25:58,440 --> 00:26:01,359 Speaker 1: like it would have been such a great experience. And 549 00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:04,200 Speaker 1: then I saw this mom and her daughter. Her daughter 550 00:26:04,320 --> 00:26:08,360 Speaker 1: was like decked out in that cute little ski jacket. Yeah, 551 00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:10,840 Speaker 1: my kids, And she was like, thanks mommy for such 552 00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:11,560 Speaker 1: a fun day. 553 00:26:11,680 --> 00:26:13,840 Speaker 2: I love you so much. You're such a good parent. 554 00:26:14,440 --> 00:26:17,600 Speaker 1: And I was like, oh my god, my heart had 555 00:26:17,600 --> 00:26:19,840 Speaker 1: the gilts and I was like I was kicking myself. 556 00:26:19,840 --> 00:26:22,119 Speaker 1: I was like, I should have just brought Marley. It 557 00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:24,720 Speaker 1: would have been such an amazing experience. And then I 558 00:26:24,760 --> 00:26:27,480 Speaker 1: saw something that made me change my mind. 559 00:26:27,840 --> 00:26:31,560 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, and it was a dad said. 560 00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:38,520 Speaker 1: He was standing there carrying his skis like arms out 561 00:26:38,000 --> 00:26:43,160 Speaker 1: like carrying sticks, defeated his skis, his poles, his kids, 562 00:26:43,280 --> 00:26:45,760 Speaker 1: two of them, all of their skis, and he's. 563 00:26:45,640 --> 00:26:48,840 Speaker 2: Going, Johnathan, get out of that right now. 564 00:26:49,840 --> 00:26:52,480 Speaker 1: Kid must have been five or six on his back, 565 00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:56,080 Speaker 1: just like laying in the muddy, melted water, big puddles 566 00:26:56,119 --> 00:26:58,040 Speaker 1: of it. And he's like, dog, not see that, I'm 567 00:26:58,080 --> 00:27:04,920 Speaker 1: corrying all the skis. No, see this dad fucking losing 568 00:27:04,960 --> 00:27:07,680 Speaker 1: it at his kids. Both kids had no interest in 569 00:27:07,720 --> 00:27:08,480 Speaker 1: being at the snow. 570 00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:10,280 Speaker 2: And you just spent all this money for him to 571 00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:11,080 Speaker 2: And I. 572 00:27:11,040 --> 00:27:12,680 Speaker 1: Just thought, do you know what, maybe it's the right 573 00:27:12,720 --> 00:27:15,520 Speaker 1: thing that I'm definitely I'm not here with the kids totally. 574 00:27:15,560 --> 00:27:17,200 Speaker 1: My other favorite thing that I saw at the snow 575 00:27:17,520 --> 00:27:20,320 Speaker 1: ash A lot of people go to the snow and 576 00:27:20,680 --> 00:27:23,320 Speaker 1: do a little bit of skiing snowboarding, but really they're 577 00:27:23,359 --> 00:27:24,960 Speaker 1: there to get pissed and party. 578 00:27:25,040 --> 00:27:25,679 Speaker 2: That's why I'd go. 579 00:27:26,119 --> 00:27:28,880 Speaker 1: That's yeah, I feel like you're that target audience, someone 580 00:27:28,920 --> 00:27:29,680 Speaker 1: who would like to. 581 00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:31,600 Speaker 2: You could have just left me there. You could do 582 00:27:31,720 --> 00:27:32,480 Speaker 2: what you need to do with. 583 00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:35,000 Speaker 1: This you do out there, there's a lot of bars. 584 00:27:35,080 --> 00:27:37,880 Speaker 1: Secret at pray skiing they call it ash for those 585 00:27:37,920 --> 00:27:40,240 Speaker 1: who aren't familiar with the terms. That's when you drink 586 00:27:40,280 --> 00:27:41,760 Speaker 1: after you have been on the mountain. 587 00:27:42,200 --> 00:27:43,280 Speaker 2: Isn't that just called drinking? 588 00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:47,200 Speaker 1: A pray a pray? Isn't it just a prayer after 589 00:27:47,520 --> 00:27:48,280 Speaker 1: no at praise? 590 00:27:48,359 --> 00:27:48,600 Speaker 2: Yeah? 591 00:27:48,640 --> 00:27:52,320 Speaker 1: After ski a pray a pray skiing Wayne pray ski. 592 00:27:52,560 --> 00:27:54,840 Speaker 1: I'm trying to fucking teach you, mate, Do you want 593 00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:57,760 Speaker 1: to learn? Do you want to come or not? People 594 00:27:57,760 --> 00:27:59,240 Speaker 1: are talking in ski terms. 595 00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:01,159 Speaker 2: And you're like, what is everyone talking about? 596 00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:05,600 Speaker 1: And then and then when you hear apri ski. Thank 597 00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:08,840 Speaker 1: god Matt taught me what people are talking about. As 598 00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:11,320 Speaker 1: I stand here on my crocs and puffer jacket. 599 00:28:12,720 --> 00:28:14,080 Speaker 2: I'm gonna get some croc skis. 600 00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:18,560 Speaker 1: One morning on the Saturday, we got it pretty early 601 00:28:18,640 --> 00:28:21,840 Speaker 1: to go, trying to get first lifts up and at 602 00:28:21,880 --> 00:28:23,879 Speaker 1: the bottom there was a toilet there in the urinal. 603 00:28:24,359 --> 00:28:27,199 Speaker 1: The guy standing there, who had clearly had a fucking 604 00:28:27,240 --> 00:28:31,520 Speaker 1: big night nice, He's stunk of booze anyway. So he's 605 00:28:31,520 --> 00:28:33,920 Speaker 1: like he's standing to one side. I'm standing about a 606 00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:36,680 Speaker 1: meter or two away from him. I'm pissing, and he's 607 00:28:36,760 --> 00:28:39,960 Speaker 1: doing the piss where he like did the head back. 608 00:28:39,880 --> 00:28:43,560 Speaker 2: Like, oh, that's the best piss. 609 00:28:43,120 --> 00:28:49,320 Speaker 1: Except his ski glove had fallen in the trough. Yes, 610 00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:53,480 Speaker 1: that's great, and he's just pissing on his glove, and I. 611 00:28:53,480 --> 00:28:54,880 Speaker 2: Was just like defeated. Man. 612 00:28:55,120 --> 00:28:58,080 Speaker 1: I was like, excuse me, and he's like and I'm like, hey, 613 00:28:58,760 --> 00:29:05,680 Speaker 1: your glove and he's like, oh my god, imagine being 614 00:29:05,720 --> 00:29:06,480 Speaker 1: that hungover. 615 00:29:07,360 --> 00:29:09,280 Speaker 2: That sounds like a really good time. 616 00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:14,040 Speaker 1: And then, just quickly before we move on to your segment, 617 00:29:14,520 --> 00:29:17,880 Speaker 1: I was driving back ash and I was very excited 618 00:29:17,920 --> 00:29:20,560 Speaker 1: to see my girls three nights away. I was like, 619 00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:23,120 Speaker 1: I can't wait. I'm gonna I made sure I got home. 620 00:29:23,120 --> 00:29:25,560 Speaker 2: Got to be the best at ever, read. 621 00:29:25,360 --> 00:29:27,560 Speaker 1: Them stories, and I thought, I'm going to get home 622 00:29:27,640 --> 00:29:30,120 Speaker 1: at like six o'clock so I can do dinner at 623 00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:33,720 Speaker 1: bath with them, put them to bed, and lasted about 624 00:29:34,520 --> 00:29:36,680 Speaker 1: I'm going to say seven minutes before I was like, 625 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:39,240 Speaker 1: probably should have taken a longer break on the road 626 00:29:39,680 --> 00:29:41,560 Speaker 1: and come home when they're asleep. 627 00:29:43,160 --> 00:29:46,120 Speaker 2: One more free night. Gotta get that free night. 628 00:29:47,040 --> 00:29:49,720 Speaker 1: Doesn't last long, does it? No, it doesn't last long. 629 00:29:49,840 --> 00:29:52,400 Speaker 1: I was like, who wants a story? Fuck off? 630 00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:56,800 Speaker 2: Dad, you abandoned us for the snow. Ash told us 631 00:29:56,840 --> 00:29:57,680 Speaker 2: all about it. 632 00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:02,280 Speaker 1: Because anyone would to put their pe amazon. No, you're 633 00:30:02,320 --> 00:30:03,240 Speaker 1: a shit parent. 634 00:30:03,440 --> 00:30:06,400 Speaker 2: I was like, we heard about the Milo kids, so 635 00:30:06,440 --> 00:30:07,600 Speaker 2: we're having such a good time. 636 00:30:07,920 --> 00:30:11,400 Speaker 1: You're a ship dad. Your brain really tricks you into 637 00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:14,040 Speaker 1: thinking that you're going to enjoy it a lot more 638 00:30:14,080 --> 00:30:14,920 Speaker 1: than what it's actually. 639 00:30:15,400 --> 00:30:21,680 Speaker 2: It was how quickly you forget? Who story was so boring? 640 00:30:26,960 --> 00:30:28,280 Speaker 1: Was it a real yawn? Yeah? 641 00:30:28,320 --> 00:30:30,600 Speaker 2: That was. You're gonna lie down if you want, mate, 642 00:30:30,600 --> 00:30:33,800 Speaker 2: I'm going to you quickly forget. It's hard, damn Yeah, 643 00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:37,120 Speaker 2: like just pecking away, yeah, pecking away. And then you 644 00:30:37,120 --> 00:30:39,200 Speaker 2: go away and they're not pecking away for three days 645 00:30:39,200 --> 00:30:41,880 Speaker 2: and you're like, I could go back and just kill it, 646 00:30:42,080 --> 00:30:45,600 Speaker 2: and then they bring you crashing back down to earth 647 00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:46,440 Speaker 2: within minutes. 648 00:30:46,520 --> 00:30:49,640 Speaker 1: It's kind of like. It's kind of like spicy food, 649 00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:51,720 Speaker 1: you know, when you haven't had spicy food for a 650 00:30:51,720 --> 00:30:53,840 Speaker 1: while and you think, I'm gonna have something spicy. I'll 651 00:30:53,840 --> 00:30:56,040 Speaker 1: get the curry, and then you have one mouthful, and 652 00:30:56,040 --> 00:30:58,640 Speaker 1: you're like that is hot and awful and not good 653 00:30:58,720 --> 00:31:00,120 Speaker 1: and I'm not enjoying this at all. 654 00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:02,280 Speaker 2: And then the next day your ring hoole's just stinging. 655 00:31:07,520 --> 00:31:18,080 Speaker 2: Tell me lies, Tell me Lie, Matthew. Our favorite segment, lies, 656 00:31:18,760 --> 00:31:21,320 Speaker 2: and our lovely listeners submit lies. 657 00:31:21,360 --> 00:31:22,440 Speaker 1: Would you like to go first? 658 00:31:22,640 --> 00:31:23,080 Speaker 2: I think so? 659 00:31:23,320 --> 00:31:23,520 Speaker 1: Yeah? 660 00:31:23,920 --> 00:31:24,480 Speaker 2: Is that okay with you? 661 00:31:24,520 --> 00:31:26,000 Speaker 1: Well, we may as well get you done in Dusty 662 00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:27,520 Speaker 1: because you're about to fall asleep. You keep your wanting 663 00:31:27,600 --> 00:31:28,040 Speaker 1: so much. 664 00:31:28,440 --> 00:31:30,520 Speaker 2: Maybe you should just perk up your stories a little 665 00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:36,640 Speaker 2: bit more. Make it through the episode. I'm just hurting 666 00:31:36,880 --> 00:31:39,120 Speaker 2: you eat it. When we fight, we're not fighting. We're 667 00:31:39,120 --> 00:31:42,000 Speaker 2: not I'll go first, just because I'm doing the talking 668 00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:47,240 Speaker 2: right now, Lies Matthew. Every week our Lovely listeners send 669 00:31:47,320 --> 00:31:47,840 Speaker 2: us lies. 670 00:31:47,960 --> 00:31:49,040 Speaker 1: They are great listeners. 671 00:31:49,040 --> 00:31:51,440 Speaker 2: It's either their d ms or we get you know, 672 00:31:51,560 --> 00:31:53,120 Speaker 2: old mate farting into his phone. 673 00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:57,120 Speaker 1: Also, Dylan Brown, what's up? You've been very good at 674 00:31:57,120 --> 00:31:57,920 Speaker 1: replying to people. 675 00:31:58,080 --> 00:32:01,480 Speaker 2: I know, very good because I'm not drinking as much 676 00:32:05,480 --> 00:32:08,920 Speaker 2: at the moment. Got They have one of those robot vacuums, 677 00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:10,880 Speaker 2: much like what you have over here that other rich 678 00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:11,320 Speaker 2: people have. 679 00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:17,360 Speaker 1: I keep next to the puffa Jackets. 680 00:32:17,080 --> 00:32:20,000 Speaker 2: Puffa Jackets and the Crocs. So they've got a robot vacuum, 681 00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:24,080 Speaker 2: and they warned their kids the robot vacuum comes around 682 00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:26,440 Speaker 2: at night and picks up all the toys on the 683 00:32:26,480 --> 00:32:30,640 Speaker 2: floor that you've left out. Yes, clever, and I am 684 00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:36,840 Speaker 2: going to buy the cheapest robot vacuum from wherever and 685 00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:41,280 Speaker 2: use the same Yeah, I reckon, that's an absolute fucking winner. 686 00:32:43,040 --> 00:32:45,320 Speaker 2: The worst. So he got he got the tracks out, 687 00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:47,000 Speaker 2: like the hot worst track. I think I've told you 688 00:32:47,040 --> 00:32:49,320 Speaker 2: this story. You got the hot worst tracks out. And 689 00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:51,320 Speaker 2: I were meant to be going to a birthday party. 690 00:32:51,360 --> 00:32:54,680 Speaker 2: I said, you can't go to the party until you've 691 00:32:54,720 --> 00:32:57,680 Speaker 2: cleaned all this up. And then I went upstairs to 692 00:32:57,760 --> 00:33:00,040 Speaker 2: get dressed, and I kept like checking on him, and 693 00:33:00,120 --> 00:33:02,080 Speaker 2: he was just kicking his heels and he was like, 694 00:33:02,160 --> 00:33:07,040 Speaker 2: this is boring. I'm bored, but I want to party. 695 00:33:09,480 --> 00:33:12,680 Speaker 2: Pick them up, like, pick them up, go to the party. 696 00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:14,480 Speaker 2: He was like, but I just want to party. I 697 00:33:14,520 --> 00:33:18,320 Speaker 2: was like, mate, me too, trust me. But sometimes you've 698 00:33:18,320 --> 00:33:20,360 Speaker 2: got to get through the week before you can party. 699 00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:25,959 Speaker 1: That's not fun. Today you were drunk on Tuthay. 700 00:33:25,960 --> 00:33:30,320 Speaker 2: Get through half the day, okay, then you can party. 701 00:33:30,440 --> 00:33:34,520 Speaker 2: So now I'm just gonna get even the robot vacuum 702 00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:36,680 Speaker 2: doesn't work, And if someone wants to donate a robot 703 00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:38,440 Speaker 2: vacuum to me, that'd be great because that would really 704 00:33:38,440 --> 00:33:43,920 Speaker 2: help me out because Oscar lazy shit, Matthew, what have you? 705 00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:47,120 Speaker 1: Okay? Well, this one has come from a lovely listener Ash, 706 00:33:47,640 --> 00:33:50,480 Speaker 1: who actually is someone that I've had sex with, and 707 00:33:50,520 --> 00:33:52,200 Speaker 1: I don't often have sex with the listeners. 708 00:33:52,280 --> 00:33:56,840 Speaker 2: I didn't know my mum was writing it. No, this 709 00:33:56,880 --> 00:33:58,320 Speaker 2: one is I don't know if I have sex with 710 00:33:58,360 --> 00:34:01,720 Speaker 2: the listeners from me either. 711 00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:05,800 Speaker 1: Lovely I say, our lovely wife, my lovely wife out. 712 00:34:05,880 --> 00:34:07,440 Speaker 1: But what's mine is yours? Yes? 713 00:34:07,720 --> 00:34:09,880 Speaker 2: This is all, isn't it? 714 00:34:10,000 --> 00:34:11,880 Speaker 1: This is a recording submission. 715 00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:15,360 Speaker 2: I have a new but totally acceptable lie that we 716 00:34:15,360 --> 00:34:18,600 Speaker 2: can tell our children and has worked for like four 717 00:34:18,640 --> 00:34:21,040 Speaker 2: days straight now. So I told Lola four days ago 718 00:34:21,040 --> 00:34:23,560 Speaker 2: because she hates giving her teeth brushed. I told her 719 00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:26,799 Speaker 2: that there's sugar bugs in her teeth and we have 720 00:34:26,840 --> 00:34:29,120 Speaker 2: to brush the sugar bugs out. But then I doubled 721 00:34:29,120 --> 00:34:30,759 Speaker 2: down on it because today I showed her she had 722 00:34:30,840 --> 00:34:32,440 Speaker 2: chocolate in her teeth, and I showed her the chocolate 723 00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:32,719 Speaker 2: and I was. 724 00:34:32,719 --> 00:34:37,799 Speaker 1: Like, look, it's the sugar bugs. She was like, God, crush, 725 00:34:39,040 --> 00:34:40,360 Speaker 1: that's a parenting win, a. 726 00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:45,080 Speaker 2: Little hip thrust. That's really I always say that, like 727 00:34:45,280 --> 00:34:49,160 Speaker 2: this segment really brings out the creativity of parents, and 728 00:34:49,200 --> 00:34:52,879 Speaker 2: I don't think it can be underestimated how creative people are, 729 00:34:52,920 --> 00:34:55,880 Speaker 2: because look, Laura has just come up with that sugar bugs. 730 00:34:55,880 --> 00:34:59,799 Speaker 2: Sugar bugs is gray. It's like you'll, legitimately you go 731 00:35:00,080 --> 00:35:03,319 Speaker 2: to the depths of your creative mind to come up 732 00:35:03,360 --> 00:35:06,839 Speaker 2: with something to get a small child to do what 733 00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:08,440 Speaker 2: it is that they have to do. 734 00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:11,799 Speaker 1: It's amazing how effective it is because I would have 735 00:35:11,840 --> 00:35:14,440 Speaker 1: to like pin her down to brush her teeth, and 736 00:35:14,480 --> 00:35:16,880 Speaker 1: she would be wriggling and squirming and screaming, and. 737 00:35:16,880 --> 00:35:20,799 Speaker 2: It was like a dog brush, Like it was easy. 738 00:35:20,520 --> 00:35:22,720 Speaker 1: To brush Buster's teeth and it was Lolla's. 739 00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:28,000 Speaker 2: And she's got all her limbs. How sleepy is over there? 740 00:35:29,280 --> 00:35:33,560 Speaker 1: Hey buddy, wake him up? Hey, yeah, you asshole. 741 00:35:35,239 --> 00:35:38,240 Speaker 2: Hey see tails Wagon's tails. 742 00:35:38,280 --> 00:35:42,920 Speaker 1: He's like, what do you want? Lola will come to 743 00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:44,759 Speaker 1: us now as soon as she finishes dinner, and she 744 00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:48,880 Speaker 1: goes the sugar bugs, quick, quick, get them out. It's amazing. 745 00:35:48,920 --> 00:35:52,560 Speaker 1: I mean, she's anxiety on the poor girl's never been higher. 746 00:35:54,120 --> 00:35:54,760 Speaker 2: Just walking around. 747 00:35:55,880 --> 00:35:56,439 Speaker 1: Get them out. 748 00:35:56,560 --> 00:35:58,279 Speaker 2: What sugar is she having? That's what I want to. 749 00:35:58,200 --> 00:36:00,799 Speaker 1: Know, Hey, Ash before we go, But we do have 750 00:36:00,920 --> 00:36:05,640 Speaker 1: time as always for two listener questions people who have 751 00:36:05,680 --> 00:36:08,279 Speaker 1: written in they need advice for their own situation. For 752 00:36:08,360 --> 00:36:12,040 Speaker 1: some unknown reason, they've come to us. I will go 753 00:36:12,560 --> 00:36:18,640 Speaker 1: first if I may, sure, Okay, this question comes from Louise. 754 00:36:19,320 --> 00:36:23,400 Speaker 1: Louise asks, how do you stop your kids from eating 755 00:36:23,840 --> 00:36:26,640 Speaker 1: dry dog or cat food from the pets bowl? 756 00:36:27,880 --> 00:36:32,920 Speaker 2: Pick the bowl up. I'm pretty simple, although I have 757 00:36:33,120 --> 00:36:36,279 Speaker 2: never had this problem. The problem that we have had 758 00:36:36,360 --> 00:36:40,480 Speaker 2: with both kids is they love the water bowl. Ah, 759 00:36:41,520 --> 00:36:44,680 Speaker 2: that's the thing. They splashing around in the fucking water bowl. 760 00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:48,759 Speaker 2: Thankfully I don't have carpet, it's got tiles, so clean up. 761 00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:50,120 Speaker 2: To Evie, well, it's just annoying. 762 00:36:50,200 --> 00:36:51,879 Speaker 1: I was going to say, Louise, are you sure you're 763 00:36:51,880 --> 00:36:55,000 Speaker 1: not raising dog an animal? 764 00:36:55,360 --> 00:36:59,520 Speaker 2: Because we don't see a dog parents at the same 765 00:36:59,640 --> 00:37:05,000 Speaker 2: levels see actual parents on this podcast. They never never 766 00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:05,440 Speaker 2: eating it. 767 00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:09,319 Speaker 1: They're not not They like to. Actually sometimes they're like, 768 00:37:09,719 --> 00:37:13,759 Speaker 1: have you ever had well a dog biscuit? Yeah? 769 00:37:14,000 --> 00:37:20,919 Speaker 2: No, I ate a shmacko now I go Waco for shmacos? 770 00:37:21,239 --> 00:37:22,120 Speaker 2: How's that for a plug? 771 00:37:22,160 --> 00:37:28,000 Speaker 1: At we are looking for a new sponsor. What flavor 772 00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:30,000 Speaker 1: you got this beef jerky with. 773 00:37:30,000 --> 00:37:33,520 Speaker 2: Lamb neck because they make them so realistic? Now looking, 774 00:37:33,680 --> 00:37:35,000 Speaker 2: is this the snacks? 775 00:37:35,040 --> 00:37:37,319 Speaker 1: Will you? Is this after a night out or are 776 00:37:37,360 --> 00:37:38,839 Speaker 1: you just like on a week night. 777 00:37:39,280 --> 00:37:48,920 Speaker 2: I was at a pet shop getting I was getting what. 778 00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:52,560 Speaker 1: Pet do you have? No pet? Buying a fucking box 779 00:37:52,560 --> 00:37:55,000 Speaker 1: of shmackos sitting in your car, and. 780 00:37:54,920 --> 00:37:57,120 Speaker 2: Nora is buying a new collar. 781 00:37:57,320 --> 00:37:59,920 Speaker 1: It was like, why does the car stink of shmacko? 782 00:38:02,520 --> 00:38:06,480 Speaker 2: I was buying a new collar right for four for 783 00:38:08,560 --> 00:38:12,640 Speaker 2: me and on the counter we're like, look, it was. 784 00:38:14,640 --> 00:38:16,080 Speaker 1: On, go on, explain yourself. 785 00:38:16,840 --> 00:38:20,280 Speaker 2: It was at human level the counter. I just thought 786 00:38:20,320 --> 00:38:23,520 Speaker 2: it was it was a little no. No. They were 787 00:38:23,560 --> 00:38:26,480 Speaker 2: like it was like a shape of a muffin or something. 788 00:38:26,960 --> 00:38:30,080 Speaker 2: It just looked like the little biscuits. And I was like, oh, yeah, 789 00:38:31,200 --> 00:38:31,719 Speaker 2: I ate it. 790 00:38:31,800 --> 00:38:36,839 Speaker 1: And the lady was like, excuse me? Is that? 791 00:38:36,960 --> 00:38:39,520 Speaker 2: She was like, they're meant to be for your pet. 792 00:38:40,239 --> 00:38:42,040 Speaker 2: When you have your pet with you in the pet 793 00:38:42,080 --> 00:38:46,319 Speaker 2: shop and it's like, you know, when you treat them 794 00:38:46,400 --> 00:38:48,080 Speaker 2: for being good, you just ate. 795 00:38:48,200 --> 00:38:49,640 Speaker 1: Of course it's a human eye. You're not going to 796 00:38:49,680 --> 00:38:50,840 Speaker 1: put it down on the floor. 797 00:38:50,600 --> 00:38:53,879 Speaker 2: For a dog. It was a bit of a. 798 00:38:54,520 --> 00:38:58,040 Speaker 1: We will make mistakes. We will make mistakes. 799 00:38:59,120 --> 00:39:01,279 Speaker 2: Anyway. It tastes like shit. So look, I don't know. 800 00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:04,719 Speaker 2: Just elevate it, don't put it at human level because 801 00:39:04,719 --> 00:39:10,359 Speaker 2: I don't it. Okay, Matthew. My question is things to 802 00:39:10,440 --> 00:39:14,799 Speaker 2: do at home with your toddler that don't involve screen time. 803 00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:19,160 Speaker 2: Screen time, not scream. 804 00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:22,520 Speaker 1: That's the biggest question for ever had that. I also 805 00:39:22,800 --> 00:39:26,759 Speaker 1: I don't have the answer. For Thursdays, I'm with the 806 00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:29,319 Speaker 1: girls all day. We have swimming in the morning. My 807 00:39:29,480 --> 00:39:31,279 Speaker 1: go to is the park. I'm like, I need to 808 00:39:31,280 --> 00:39:33,000 Speaker 1: be out of the house. I don't want to be 809 00:39:33,040 --> 00:39:34,200 Speaker 1: inside the house. 810 00:39:34,360 --> 00:39:38,040 Speaker 2: If it's raining and you're at home. There's like the 811 00:39:38,120 --> 00:39:41,000 Speaker 2: standards drawing, draw painting the. 812 00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:43,960 Speaker 1: Issue that I have, right though, Marley loves it, but 813 00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:47,800 Speaker 1: both girls Lola will just's, she'll draw on the walls, 814 00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:50,200 Speaker 1: she'll wreckon and then Marley will finish a drawing and 815 00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:56,359 Speaker 1: then Lola draws in it and Marley's like, my fucking drawer, unbelievable. 816 00:39:56,600 --> 00:39:57,640 Speaker 1: So then they have. 817 00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:00,880 Speaker 2: And drawing. 818 00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:08,040 Speaker 1: Where's the acid wash. My go to is we play zombies. 819 00:40:07,960 --> 00:40:10,640 Speaker 2: Just hide and seeking. You know, fine, it's h y hide. 820 00:40:10,440 --> 00:40:13,400 Speaker 1: And seek and I'm the zombie and then they have 821 00:40:13,440 --> 00:40:14,640 Speaker 1: to run away from me and I go to try 822 00:40:14,640 --> 00:40:15,160 Speaker 1: and find them. 823 00:40:15,280 --> 00:40:19,200 Speaker 2: I just locked mine in the cupboard. And on that note, 824 00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:20,560 Speaker 2: we have run out of time. 825 00:40:20,920 --> 00:40:23,479 Speaker 1: You can't just leave it at that, No, you can't. 826 00:40:24,040 --> 00:40:27,320 Speaker 1: Everyone listening Ash is joking. He loves his kids. 827 00:40:28,520 --> 00:40:29,800 Speaker 2: Why are you talking on my behalf. 828 00:40:31,239 --> 00:40:32,200 Speaker 1: I'm trying to help you. 829 00:40:32,280 --> 00:40:33,200 Speaker 2: I know what I said. 830 00:40:35,239 --> 00:40:38,120 Speaker 1: Guys, get out of here. If you have enjoyed any episodes, 831 00:40:38,560 --> 00:40:40,560 Speaker 1: I do have to. I don't want to ask you 832 00:40:40,600 --> 00:40:41,880 Speaker 1: to do something that you don't want to do. 833 00:40:42,080 --> 00:40:42,759 Speaker 2: Tell them the. 834 00:40:43,080 --> 00:40:44,600 Speaker 1: Fucking drop it right now. 835 00:40:44,640 --> 00:40:45,440 Speaker 2: I can don't. 836 00:40:45,840 --> 00:40:50,600 Speaker 1: If you could please actually three things, review, five stars 837 00:40:51,080 --> 00:40:53,520 Speaker 1: or however many stars you would like to give, write 838 00:40:53,520 --> 00:40:56,120 Speaker 1: a review. But also if you're listening on Apple Podcasts 839 00:40:56,160 --> 00:40:58,319 Speaker 1: and I think on Spotify as well, and you can 840 00:40:58,400 --> 00:41:02,080 Speaker 1: do this follow us. So then every week when we 841 00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:03,600 Speaker 1: do put that a new episode. 842 00:41:03,239 --> 00:41:06,560 Speaker 2: You get it on Wednesday in your ears that you like, 843 00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:08,640 Speaker 2: or send it to someone who needs a perk. 844 00:41:08,880 --> 00:41:11,400 Speaker 1: It's being spoon fed. Yea. It's like it's like having 845 00:41:11,440 --> 00:41:14,960 Speaker 1: us injected directly into your veins every Wednesday. 846 00:41:14,600 --> 00:41:15,880 Speaker 2: And send it to someone that needs a bit of 847 00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:16,440 Speaker 2: a pep. 848 00:41:16,280 --> 00:41:20,920 Speaker 1: Up because except for those who are parents at that 849 00:41:20,960 --> 00:41:21,560 Speaker 1: doesn't count. 850 00:41:22,320 --> 00:41:24,520 Speaker 2: Yeah. Now send it to me. We need. 851 00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:27,640 Speaker 1: Got to wash your car. 852 00:41:27,840 --> 00:41:31,960 Speaker 2: Yes, let's go. You are. 853 00:41:39,160 --> 00:41:42,760 Speaker 1: Two doting dads. Podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country 854 00:41:42,800 --> 00:41:46,480 Speaker 1: throughout Australia and the connections to land, sea and community. 855 00:41:46,719 --> 00:41:49,240 Speaker 2: We pay our respects to their elders past and present 856 00:41:49,320 --> 00:41:52,400 Speaker 2: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Islander 857 00:41:52,440 --> 00:41:56,080 Speaker 2: people's today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land