Speaker 1: I heeart podcasts.
Speaker 2: You can hear more gold when I four point three
Speaker 2: podcasts playlist and listen live on the Free iHeart.
Speaker 1: App got anything good?
Speaker 3: Hey, this is the Christian O'Connell show podcast.
Speaker 2: All right, so on today's show, then, producer Rea, what
Speaker 2: happened to these genes you got from Korea?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 3: I bought these beautiful new Korean jeans, but they were
Speaker 3: an ambitious thirty two, so I reckon I'm more of
Speaker 3: a thirty three thirty four, but I thought I would
Speaker 3: squeeze sort of back into them when I got back
Speaker 3: from Korea. Sadly, the opposite has happened. I've expanded in
Speaker 3: the waist and they literally.
Speaker 1: Flung off the buttons.
Speaker 3: It was like I flew off as I was getting
Speaker 3: ready for work. So I've had to make a late
Speaker 3: pants switch, and I've been very humbled by development.
Speaker 2: All right, we're looking for your stories and about wardrobe malfunctions.
Speaker 2: On thirteen fifty five, twenty two. There is never ever
Speaker 2: a good time for something to split, tear, or rip.
Speaker 2: I remember years ago this security guard that worked one
Speaker 2: of London's maximum security guards and he was on a
Speaker 2: wing where it was lifers and he was getting in
Speaker 2: a tussle with one of the inmates and they went
Speaker 2: to the ground and he said, the prison guard uniforms
Speaker 2: are very tight. Suddenly he's like he's grappling with an
Speaker 2: actual killer, and he said, they go to the ground
Speaker 2: and all of a suddenly hear.
Speaker 1: This and it's his backside.
Speaker 2: It's his backside has actually and he said the inmate
Speaker 2: and him just because they just start laughing.
Speaker 1: It actually de escalated the situation exactly.
Speaker 2: Please, can you go back in yourself split my pants?
Speaker 2: He's not very sorry about that.
Speaker 1: That is awesome. So, yeah, we're looking for your story.
Speaker 2: So splits, rips and tears, there's never a good time
Speaker 2: for it to happen. It's normally a really inopportunity moment
Speaker 2: in your life, at work or before a meeting.
Speaker 1: We're looking for.
Speaker 2: Those stories now about splits, rips and tears, because if
Speaker 2: it's happened to you remember it.
Speaker 1: Christian O'Connell show, go on podcast. My old radio station
Speaker 1: in UK.
Speaker 2: It was a big national radio station and so we
Speaker 2: had these new owners and they were from India. They
Speaker 2: own the Times of Indian and they were like billionaires
Speaker 2: and obviously they've been sold some magic beans by someone
Speaker 2: in England promising them unknown history should have looked at
Speaker 2: history never trusted Englishman anyway. So they were coming in
Speaker 2: for the first time to meet everyone at the radio station,
Speaker 2: and the chief executives said, would you get up and
Speaker 2: come to the boardroom presentations, say a few words about
Speaker 2: your show and why you do radio, and why you're
Speaker 2: excited about our new owners, the Indians, And he said
Speaker 2: they're here reception. I went, yeah, I really just need
Speaker 2: to go to toilet. I got to toilet. You know,
Speaker 2: when you're stretched and you're rushing, it's almost like you're
Speaker 2: you're just creating your own danger and mischief. I yanked
Speaker 2: my fly zip too hard, just too much gusto, and
Speaker 2: the whole thing came away, just came away. I mean
Speaker 2: it was lucky. There wasn't that there's something about Mary.
Speaker 1: It just came. It just came away.
Speaker 4: And I was like, oh god, there's now there's no
Speaker 4: there's no door in the front of the cage, and
Speaker 4: the Indians are here and they will take it to
Speaker 4: in view of this and this this guy getting up.
Speaker 2: There going wherever he is, Fire him if he thinks
Speaker 2: that's etcetera. It's not the way we do business back home.
Speaker 3: There's are not the magic beans.
Speaker 1: They wanted to see tiny I need to. They're here,
Speaker 1: I need to.
Speaker 2: So I go into We had like a where all
Speaker 2: the stationary was, and I was saying this, I couldn't
Speaker 2: find any cello tae bring that even that would look
Speaker 2: worse just criss crossing, said like it just it would
Speaker 2: just look I was demented or anyway. The only thing
Speaker 2: I could find was a stapler, so I grabbed a
Speaker 2: bunch and just stapled it all shut. I go and
Speaker 2: chat to them and I sit down. Then my chief
Speaker 2: exept goes, are any questions? And the new owner of
Speaker 2: this red station just goes, why have you got.
Speaker 1: Your fly staple? Shut? Please don't think.
Speaker 2: Don't let that be the only thing you remember for
Speaker 2: my ten minute speech. But why I love doing breakfast radio.
Speaker 3: Oh sorry, just before we go on, I just remembered
Speaker 3: when I first started in twenty nineteen, one of the
Speaker 3: first shows I came in, you were wearing an electrical
Speaker 3: cord as your belt. Catch this is the guy.
Speaker 1: Yes, you've got like I have history here. Now that's
Speaker 1: my story. I'm sticking to it. All right, Let's go
Speaker 1: to Carmel.
Speaker 5: Now, good morning, Carmel, Good morning everybody. How are we?
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're good. Welcome to show.
Speaker 2: So you've got to steal about spit, ripple, tear and
Speaker 2: your clothing.
Speaker 5: Yeah, don't you love it when you're up in the
Speaker 5: bush the middle of nowhere? Nice warm, snug, tight top
Speaker 5: and gee, but I'm torturing there was a couple of
Speaker 5: dumb immens. Sure enough, we're digging away. Me I'm thinking, oh,
Speaker 5: why is it got really really drafty?
Speaker 6: And my bum?
Speaker 5: Sure enough major tear? Right only all these four standing
Speaker 5: around there bum empoissment, breathing up the top, Rip and
Speaker 5: jump her off and make sure my too typical nice
Speaker 5: a warmer.
Speaker 1: A lot happening. Here is the mystery, those four guys
Speaker 1: out of the.
Speaker 2: I haven't got any questions. Actually, he dismissed. Rio, did warming?
Speaker 1: Who went?
Speaker 2: I got someone here rough ast anyway?
Speaker 1: Who we have here? Carlo? Yes? Carlo?
Speaker 7: Yes, Hi Christian.
Speaker 6: This happened about ten years ago.
Speaker 1: Yeah what happened? Carlo?
Speaker 8: Oh?
Speaker 5: Well?
Speaker 7: I went to itly for my parents' fiftieth when the
Speaker 7: anniversary and with my young family, and I took with
Speaker 7: me a nice leaning summer suit and putting on the morning,
Speaker 7: just ready to go. Running a bit late and rushing
Speaker 7: went down to fix up my daughter's shoelaces.
Speaker 6: And wrapped run in the middle of my paints. There
Speaker 6: was a rapture and my sister, trying to help, gave
Speaker 6: me a bunch of safety pins, and I walked around
Speaker 6: the whole day with safety pins my crutch.
Speaker 2: Okay, I could kind of nap it for Sumo Linen.
Speaker 2: You actually probably like some new stylish things, some sort
Speaker 2: of tip pa of wolk chier breaking fashion.
Speaker 7: I don't know about that, but it wasn't comfortable, that's
Speaker 7: for sure.
Speaker 1: Bet Carlo, thank you very much to give us a call.
Speaker 1: Have a good day. You two.
Speaker 8: The Christian o'connal show podcast.
Speaker 2: Right now, I'll ask you stories clothing malfunctions, rips and tears.
Speaker 2: Good morning, Haley. This comes in from Hailey Melder, Christian.
Speaker 2: I was heading out to local shops. I grabbed my
Speaker 2: good pair of Trackies O wait only only in Australia
Speaker 2: they have wait for a good pair of trackies, the
Speaker 2: posh ones you know for weddings and days in court.
Speaker 2: I grabbed my good pair of Trackies out fresh from
Speaker 2: the dry and hurriedly put them on whilst they were
Speaker 2: toasty warm, pulled on my shoes and off her went.
Speaker 2: When I was in Cols and the cold cheese A
Speaker 2: I really, I was unnaturally cold around.
Speaker 1: My lower half. I looked down.
Speaker 2: Eventually, Tomorhara, I discovered my dog had chewed the crutch
Speaker 2: out of my pants front to back. Oh wow, oh
Speaker 2: my god, all around the old dan and on rangers.
Speaker 2: How very unfortunate, Hailey. That is tough Christian at my wedding.
Speaker 2: This is from Alexis. The photographer squatted down to take
Speaker 2: the obligatory shot of the bridesmaids, only to stop dead
Speaker 2: and go bright red. He had split his pants front
Speaker 2: to back. You've got to take a knee. You're taking
Speaker 2: a knee at his wife. His wife had help him.
Speaker 2: Poor guy, guy, we get the photos, won't you?
Speaker 1: There? Christian way brother?
Speaker 2: Was that I function wearing a brand new soup after
Speaker 2: a belly full of beer?
Speaker 1: Who is walking to get some macas? Again?
Speaker 2: Classy behavior? He needed to go bad. He saw a
Speaker 2: construction site with a porterloo. He climbed the fence and
Speaker 2: completely ripped his pants to pieces of.
Speaker 1: But he made it a toilet for you.
Speaker 2: Thank God, and then had to walk to the cab
Speaker 2: rank to go home with no pants on.
Speaker 1: Oh no, get that, lucky customer. Yeah. In fact, I'm retiring.
Speaker 1: It's my last one. Lauren's on the line. Good morning, Lauren,
Speaker 1: welcome to the show.
Speaker 8: Good morning, Christian. Here are you going.
Speaker 1: I'm good, Laurena, hope you having a good morning now, Lauren,
Speaker 1: what's your story?
Speaker 8: Oh, it was about ten years ago and I'll never
Speaker 8: forget it. It was a ripper and it was a wedding.
Speaker 8: We that was my husband's friend's wedding, and they I
Speaker 8: don't know what it is, but it's something about the
Speaker 8: song from Top Gun that loving feelings.
Speaker 1: We all know, the one, yeah see without.
Speaker 8: Something in men. I don't know what it is, but
Speaker 8: when it comes on, they all get together on the
Speaker 8: dance floor, as many men would know, after a few
Speaker 8: beers and their arm in arm singing and dancing to
Speaker 8: this song. And there was one gentleman in particular that
Speaker 8: was extremely enthusiastic and was in full character and was
Speaker 8: holding the pretend microphone, jumping up on you know, the
Speaker 8: stage and then back down again, and then right at
Speaker 8: the end of the song went into the middle of
Speaker 8: the circle with a full like slide on his knees
Speaker 8: into the gensered his pants.
Speaker 1: We didn't see that. Marv did not do that.
Speaker 2: Unfortunately for a lot of women and men, Marv did
Speaker 2: not do that.
Speaker 6: We were all.
Speaker 8: In shock and horror and laughing and crying.
Speaker 1: Fish. He should have bowed. It's meant to happen perhaps
Speaker 1: is that for weeks.
Speaker 8: And he can't. We just got himself up, walked off
Speaker 8: the dance floor. That single word, anybody just exited the building. Incorrect, incorrect.
Speaker 8: He actually we found out later he called his mom.
Speaker 8: It was.
Speaker 1: Fancy split call mom.
Speaker 8: He said, mom, my suit's ripped. You need to take
Speaker 8: me back to the high end suit shop, which was
Speaker 8: down the road. That was an afternoon wedding. They were open.
Speaker 8: He went to the suit shop, got fitted out with
Speaker 8: a new suit, and returned back to the wedding, back on.
Speaker 7: The dance floor.
Speaker 2: Wow. Seconds with the show todays it was starting a trend.
Speaker 2: Now that is that is good behavior, just like it
Speaker 2: never happened. Lauren, thank you very much the story. Mat
Speaker 2: have a good day, thanks for calling the show.
Speaker 7: Thanks The Christian O'Connell Show Podcast