WEBVTT - MOTIVATIONAL MOMENT: Refining your inner circle ⭕

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<v Speaker 1>I'm Sam Wood, and this is your motivational moment for

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<v Speaker 1>this week, and we are going to refine our inner

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<v Speaker 1>circle for success. This motivational moment came from reading a

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<v Speaker 1>quote you are the average of the five people you

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<v Speaker 1>surround yourself with. So I've done a little bit of

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<v Speaker 1>digging into this further, and I don't think any of

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<v Speaker 1>us would deny that our inner circle has an enormous

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<v Speaker 1>influence over our perspective and what we achieve in life.

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<v Speaker 1>So it's crucial that this group of people. If you're

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<v Speaker 1>trying to better yourself, or you're trying to get somewhere

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<v Speaker 1>in work or wellness or whatever it might be, that

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<v Speaker 1>you surround yourself with the right people. So the people

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<v Speaker 1>that you want to be surrounding yourself with fall into

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<v Speaker 1>these three categories. They're either a mentor so that could

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<v Speaker 1>be a person that's doing what you want to achieve,

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<v Speaker 1>but they're one or two steps ahead, they've maybe already

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<v Speaker 1>mastered it, and there's someone that can teach you that

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<v Speaker 1>you can learn from. They're a cheerleader, so there's someone

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<v Speaker 1>there to support you and celebrate your wins, and I

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<v Speaker 1>mean genuinely celebrate your wins, not sort of in that

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<v Speaker 1>fake way where they're giving you different feedback to your

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<v Speaker 1>face than perhaps they are behind your back. And the realist,

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<v Speaker 1>the truth teller, the person you know will tell you

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<v Speaker 1>how it is when you need to have a hard

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<v Speaker 1>honest truth or a hard honest moment. So I've got mentors,

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<v Speaker 1>cheerleaders and realists. Get those people in your group, the

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<v Speaker 1>people that you don't necessarily want in your inner circle.

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<v Speaker 1>And actually I'm going to go stronger, the people you

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<v Speaker 1>don't want anywhere near your in a circle. We've got

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<v Speaker 1>negative nancies. Sorry, Nancy. You know these people. They're the

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<v Speaker 1>people that put a negative spin on everything. It might

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<v Speaker 1>be their life, it might be your life. I find

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<v Speaker 1>these people are often playing the blame. They're not inspiring,

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<v Speaker 1>and the impact they have is you start to question

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<v Speaker 1>your own abilities by hanging out with these people. And

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<v Speaker 1>the next one is the one upper. No matter how

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<v Speaker 1>much good stuff is happening in our life, they have

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<v Speaker 1>to one up you. No matter what little life milestone

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<v Speaker 1>you would like to celebrate, you would like to share

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<v Speaker 1>because you're proud of yourself, they very quickly squash that

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<v Speaker 1>down or chop that down by changing the conversation to

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<v Speaker 1>be about them and making what you thought was a

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<v Speaker 1>wonderful achievement feel very small because they have to one

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<v Speaker 1>up you in every situation that occurs. And then we've

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<v Speaker 1>got the saboteur. So you sort of have to keep

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<v Speaker 1>a wide eye for these people because they're not always

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<v Speaker 1>obvious that they're sneaking into your circle. But these people,

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<v Speaker 1>they can do little or big things to sabotage your progress.

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<v Speaker 1>So you're starting to make progress, you're starting to make change,

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<v Speaker 1>starting to feel good, and they just find a way.

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<v Speaker 1>They seem to have a way of bringing you down

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<v Speaker 1>on purpose. They might even stand in the way of

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<v Speaker 1>your success. And it's kind of natural that these people

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<v Speaker 1>come out of the woodwork, because I've sort of said

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<v Speaker 1>this before in this podcast. I think, but I often

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<v Speaker 1>think people want you to do well until you do.

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<v Speaker 1>I think, you know, often people stand behind you and

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<v Speaker 1>they good on you for having a go, and you

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<v Speaker 1>should be so proud of yourself. And then you reach

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<v Speaker 1>a point of success and those people no longer have

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<v Speaker 1>the same attitude. You know, resentment and jealousy and all

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<v Speaker 1>these other sort of natural human emotions sort of creep in.

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<v Speaker 1>But I see it all the time. I see it.

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<v Speaker 1>With fitness, people often feel like it's easier to bring

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<v Speaker 1>someone else down than to bring themselves up. Rather than

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<v Speaker 1>me get myself off the couch and get myself moving,

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<v Speaker 1>I'll try and take that person to the pub and

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<v Speaker 1>sabotage their weight loss journey, you know, sort of put

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<v Speaker 1>a spin on it. It's like, oh, you never catch

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<v Speaker 1>up with this anymore, and you're not social anymore. But

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<v Speaker 1>the reality is they're really just trying to bring you

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<v Speaker 1>back down to their level rather than the alternative is

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<v Speaker 1>they have to come up to your new level, which

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<v Speaker 1>is much harder for them to do. So it's time

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<v Speaker 1>to do a little bit of really honest reflecting on

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<v Speaker 1>who our inner circle is and which of these six

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<v Speaker 1>categories they fit in, and if they're fitting into the

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<v Speaker 1>wrong three categories, you got to boot them out. That

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<v Speaker 1>doesn't mean you remove them from your life altogether. But

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<v Speaker 1>if you are really on a mission to go somewhere

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<v Speaker 1>next year or whatever, it might be, what a perfect

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<v Speaker 1>moment for you to identify who the helpers are and

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<v Speaker 1>who the Hinduas are and surround yourself with the helpers

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<v Speaker 1>in twenty twenty three and spend less time or less

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<v Speaker 1>time in particular moments, particular places, particular environments, with those that,

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<v Speaker 1>when you really think about it, don't necessarily want the

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<v Speaker 1>best for you or won't necessarily contribute to the best

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<v Speaker 1>for you. Happening in twenty twenty three. So as always

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<v Speaker 1>now says homework. Your task for this week is this.

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<v Speaker 1>I want you to reflect. Now I've said the five

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<v Speaker 1>people you surround yourself with. So have a look at

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<v Speaker 1>your inner circle. Write a little list down of who

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<v Speaker 1>are your mentors, your cheerleaders, your realists. Surround yourself with

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<v Speaker 1>those people and distance yourself from the negative nancies, the

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<v Speaker 1>one uppers, and the saboteurs.