1 00:00:04,071 --> 00:00:06,551 Speaker 1: Podcast unite our voices. 2 00:00:08,191 --> 00:00:11,711 Speaker 2: Gotcha for Life and Black Magic Woman podcast acknowledges the 3 00:00:11,751 --> 00:00:15,311 Speaker 2: traditional owners of the land which we recorded this episode. 4 00:00:15,391 --> 00:00:18,391 Speaker 2: We also acknowledge the traditional owners of the land from 5 00:00:18,391 --> 00:00:21,271 Speaker 2: where you, the listener or viewer, are tuning in. We 6 00:00:21,311 --> 00:00:23,751 Speaker 2: would like to pay our respects to elders, both past 7 00:00:23,831 --> 00:00:26,951 Speaker 2: and present. We acknowledge that this land always was and 8 00:00:27,031 --> 00:00:33,351 Speaker 2: always will be Aboriginal land. This podcast talks about mental health, suicide, 9 00:00:33,511 --> 00:00:36,271 Speaker 2: and lived experience. If that brings anything up for you, 10 00:00:36,351 --> 00:00:39,431 Speaker 2: please take care while listening and remember you don't need 11 00:00:39,471 --> 00:00:45,831 Speaker 2: to worry alone. Welcome to Mental Fitness Conversations, a podcast 12 00:00:45,871 --> 00:00:50,031 Speaker 2: about how real people build their mental fitness through connection, community, 13 00:00:50,151 --> 00:00:52,991 Speaker 2: and simple everyday actions. Brought to you by Gotcha for 14 00:00:53,071 --> 00:00:56,791 Speaker 2: Life in partnership with Black Magic Woman. Here's your host, 15 00:00:56,991 --> 00:00:58,111 Speaker 2: Monda Narrabels. 16 00:00:59,151 --> 00:01:02,111 Speaker 1: Welcome back to another deadly episode. 17 00:01:02,471 --> 00:01:03,951 Speaker 3: This is a. 18 00:01:03,711 --> 00:01:07,031 Speaker 1: Partnership series We've Gotcha for Life and Black Magic Women, 19 00:01:07,711 --> 00:01:11,671 Speaker 1: where we yarn to deadly blackfellows from right across the 20 00:01:11,711 --> 00:01:17,111 Speaker 1: country and talk about building our mental fitness, building our 21 00:01:17,231 --> 00:01:20,471 Speaker 1: village like making sure that no one ever has to 22 00:01:21,151 --> 00:01:26,031 Speaker 1: worry alone. We want to share inspirational stories embedded in culture, 23 00:01:26,311 --> 00:01:31,831 Speaker 1: community connection and resilience. Gotcha for Life is a foundation 24 00:01:32,031 --> 00:01:35,791 Speaker 1: where we want to imagine and work towards in Australia 25 00:01:36,231 --> 00:01:43,631 Speaker 1: with no suicides. And we know that mental health and suicide, depression, 26 00:01:43,791 --> 00:01:48,631 Speaker 1: anxiety a lot of our mob experience, but more they're 27 00:01:48,671 --> 00:01:52,311 Speaker 1: impacted more. Some of our listeners may even feel a 28 00:01:52,351 --> 00:01:56,351 Speaker 1: little bit triggered by this yard. And so please reach 29 00:01:56,431 --> 00:02:00,031 Speaker 1: out to your community and get support or ring one 30 00:02:00,111 --> 00:02:04,151 Speaker 1: three yarn twenty four hours, seven days away week and 31 00:02:04,191 --> 00:02:06,231 Speaker 1: you can talk to somebody who can actually help you 32 00:02:06,671 --> 00:02:09,311 Speaker 1: with what you're going through. The person that I have 33 00:02:09,391 --> 00:02:12,831 Speaker 1: on the show where my sister, This is Chantel Thompson, 34 00:02:13,391 --> 00:02:15,831 Speaker 1: and she's going to tell you her story. So thank 35 00:02:15,871 --> 00:02:20,351 Speaker 1: you for flying in this morning, and thank you for 36 00:02:20,431 --> 00:02:24,191 Speaker 1: giving up your time and lending your voice to be 37 00:02:24,311 --> 00:02:29,151 Speaker 1: part of this really important conversation. Tell us your mob, 38 00:02:29,391 --> 00:02:33,671 Speaker 1: your community and a little bit about where you grew up. 39 00:02:34,271 --> 00:02:37,431 Speaker 3: Yeah, perfect, and we're weaving that yarn in right. It's 40 00:02:37,471 --> 00:02:41,711 Speaker 3: been five years and so much has happened in the 41 00:02:41,751 --> 00:02:44,231 Speaker 3: world for us for the work that we do. 42 00:02:45,391 --> 00:02:46,391 Speaker 1: You had another baby. 43 00:02:46,631 --> 00:02:50,431 Speaker 3: I did have another baby. I didn't see that one coming. No, 44 00:02:50,631 --> 00:02:53,751 Speaker 3: I was always on the cards, but life has definitely shifted. 45 00:02:53,791 --> 00:02:56,671 Speaker 3: He's my I call him a little cooka cub, my 46 00:02:56,711 --> 00:02:59,831 Speaker 3: little kooka bar. He bought a new sunrise, a new 47 00:02:59,871 --> 00:03:02,671 Speaker 3: season into my life, and a new reckoning as well. 48 00:03:03,631 --> 00:03:06,191 Speaker 3: I just want to remind people that Australia did have 49 00:03:06,271 --> 00:03:09,231 Speaker 3: a world without suicide, It did have a world without 50 00:03:09,271 --> 00:03:11,831 Speaker 3: mental health prior to colonization. 51 00:03:11,351 --> 00:03:15,431 Speaker 1: Because there are no words. There are words thousand Aboraginal 52 00:03:15,551 --> 00:03:17,671 Speaker 1: languages for suicide. 53 00:03:17,391 --> 00:03:19,791 Speaker 3: Yeah, for even mental health and stuff like that, like too. 54 00:03:20,551 --> 00:03:23,551 Speaker 3: And this is only something I learned recently. In Bakangy language. 55 00:03:23,591 --> 00:03:27,391 Speaker 3: I was trying to look for words to describe the 56 00:03:27,431 --> 00:03:29,751 Speaker 3: work that I'm doing because my work is evolving and 57 00:03:29,831 --> 00:03:33,671 Speaker 3: something new is being born. And I reach out to 58 00:03:33,711 --> 00:03:37,951 Speaker 3: one of our language holders, our knowledge keepers, and I 59 00:03:38,071 --> 00:03:40,631 Speaker 3: was like, I need words for this, and he's like, shantel, 60 00:03:40,671 --> 00:03:43,431 Speaker 3: there are no words that exist for unnatural states of being. 61 00:03:43,431 --> 00:03:45,271 Speaker 3: And I was like, oh, for natural states of being. 62 00:03:45,351 --> 00:03:46,991 Speaker 3: I'm sorry, and he's like and I'm like, what do 63 00:03:47,031 --> 00:03:49,551 Speaker 3: you mean And he's like, well, you're looking for empowerment. 64 00:03:49,591 --> 00:03:51,511 Speaker 3: There is no word for empowerment because it was already 65 00:03:51,551 --> 00:03:54,511 Speaker 3: a natural state of being. So like Western methods of 66 00:03:54,591 --> 00:03:57,511 Speaker 3: well being is the absence of illness. But that's the 67 00:03:57,551 --> 00:04:01,431 Speaker 3: bare minimum. For our mob. The bare minimum is thriving, 68 00:04:01,471 --> 00:04:04,151 Speaker 3: and I think that's the difference. That's the reckoning yarns 69 00:04:04,191 --> 00:04:06,551 Speaker 3: like this have because we don't want to settle for 70 00:04:06,551 --> 00:04:08,511 Speaker 3: the status quo. We don't want to settle for less 71 00:04:08,511 --> 00:04:11,111 Speaker 3: than And I guess that was the birthplace for my story. 72 00:04:11,551 --> 00:04:13,311 Speaker 3: So for those that haven't met me yet, my name 73 00:04:13,351 --> 00:04:16,231 Speaker 3: is Chantel Thompson and I'm a proud barkinging imple woman. 74 00:04:16,831 --> 00:04:21,071 Speaker 3: I'm a nongo wimpature from northwestern town of Derton, So 75 00:04:21,151 --> 00:04:24,071 Speaker 3: I grew up in a very small community. My mum 76 00:04:24,391 --> 00:04:28,591 Speaker 3: is and my grandparents are from Vulcana, and that community 77 00:04:28,671 --> 00:04:32,111 Speaker 3: is known for far too many of the wrong statistics. 78 00:04:33,031 --> 00:04:37,111 Speaker 3: And yet a lot of our narratives in mainstream systems, 79 00:04:37,151 --> 00:04:40,991 Speaker 3: even in our own systems, are grounded in deficit in trauma. 80 00:04:41,471 --> 00:04:44,351 Speaker 3: It's almost that you have to prostitute your trauma to 81 00:04:44,431 --> 00:04:47,471 Speaker 3: get a stage, to get funding. And even in the 82 00:04:47,471 --> 00:04:51,391 Speaker 3: spaces that I work, prevention as the primary prevention of 83 00:04:51,431 --> 00:04:54,111 Speaker 3: what we are often tasked blackfellows a task with the 84 00:04:54,151 --> 00:04:57,391 Speaker 3: responsibility to solve problems that were not of our own 85 00:04:57,431 --> 00:05:01,551 Speaker 3: making and yet justifying why those solutions should be funded. 86 00:05:01,991 --> 00:05:04,111 Speaker 3: And I guess this has been a big driver my life. 87 00:05:04,151 --> 00:05:06,871 Speaker 3: So I'm known as the Barkandy Warrior. I'm a very 88 00:05:08,031 --> 00:05:10,871 Speaker 3: proud sibling of up to seventeen siblings, so mum and 89 00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:14,111 Speaker 3: dad together and then mum and Dad separated, and I'm 90 00:05:14,151 --> 00:05:16,511 Speaker 3: the very proud mum of five children ranging in ages 91 00:05:16,551 --> 00:05:20,351 Speaker 3: from eighteen down to four. And I'm Anishann too many 92 00:05:20,351 --> 00:05:23,271 Speaker 3: more so my role is Namika mum and as Anishan 93 00:05:23,511 --> 00:05:26,991 Speaker 3: and as Shantell the woman and understanding what that means 94 00:05:26,991 --> 00:05:29,431 Speaker 3: in this season of life. Are are my main roles. 95 00:05:29,431 --> 00:05:32,871 Speaker 3: They're the roles that define everything else. So I have 96 00:05:32,951 --> 00:05:35,671 Speaker 3: many different cultural backgrounds, but being a First Nations woman, 97 00:05:36,711 --> 00:05:39,191 Speaker 3: my story was seated in the whim of my ancestors. 98 00:05:39,791 --> 00:05:43,151 Speaker 3: And I am a self determined, sovereign, dreaming, led Aboriginal 99 00:05:43,151 --> 00:05:46,271 Speaker 3: woman first and foremost. And that is not the narrative 100 00:05:46,311 --> 00:05:48,351 Speaker 3: that was told to me. It was not the narrative 101 00:05:48,431 --> 00:05:52,271 Speaker 3: that the colonial patriarchal world tried to force upon me. 102 00:05:52,911 --> 00:05:55,431 Speaker 3: And every time I pushed back and said that wasn't 103 00:05:55,431 --> 00:05:58,991 Speaker 3: my story, there were consequences. There was a price to pay, 104 00:05:59,671 --> 00:06:01,791 Speaker 3: and I think one of the things that really drives 105 00:06:01,831 --> 00:06:04,391 Speaker 3: me now is that, particularly as a woman and an 106 00:06:04,391 --> 00:06:07,311 Speaker 3: indigenous woman, people say, be bold, just be yourself in 107 00:06:07,351 --> 00:06:09,791 Speaker 3: the world, right, But what does that mean and what 108 00:06:09,831 --> 00:06:12,351 Speaker 3: does it take? Like, what does it cost you, Mandonara 109 00:06:12,431 --> 00:06:14,951 Speaker 3: to be you in the world? What if you had 110 00:06:14,991 --> 00:06:17,311 Speaker 3: to pay, what do you still have to face? It 111 00:06:17,391 --> 00:06:19,191 Speaker 3: is not safe to be ourselves in the world. So 112 00:06:20,031 --> 00:06:22,551 Speaker 3: for me, this was the birthplace of the Barkundy warrior 113 00:06:22,631 --> 00:06:24,991 Speaker 3: and the warrior heart. And I mean my resume goes. 114 00:06:25,031 --> 00:06:29,031 Speaker 3: I have three world titles in Brazilian jiu jitsu, titles 115 00:06:29,031 --> 00:06:31,471 Speaker 3: that I won in my thirties as a mother of three, 116 00:06:31,591 --> 00:06:36,471 Speaker 3: overcoming postnatal depression, running a business, often studying, and not 117 00:06:36,511 --> 00:06:38,591 Speaker 3: because I wanted to do all those things, but because 118 00:06:38,631 --> 00:06:40,911 Speaker 3: those were the things I had to navigate and carry 119 00:06:41,511 --> 00:06:43,311 Speaker 3: just to be myself in the world, just to take 120 00:06:43,391 --> 00:06:45,831 Speaker 3: care of my family. And if I had to choose 121 00:06:45,871 --> 00:06:50,711 Speaker 3: between fighting for my dreams and settling for the status quo, 122 00:06:50,791 --> 00:06:52,671 Speaker 3: I chose to get up and fight and that's how 123 00:06:52,711 --> 00:06:55,431 Speaker 3: I started a business. Jiu Jitsu was my playtime, jiu 124 00:06:55,471 --> 00:06:59,191 Speaker 3: jitsu is my therapy, and winning world titles is easy 125 00:06:59,231 --> 00:07:03,871 Speaker 3: in comparison to healing into generational trauma, to look in 126 00:07:03,911 --> 00:07:06,551 Speaker 3: the mirror every single day, and taking responsibility for who 127 00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:09,511 Speaker 3: you're being in the world, knowing that you don't want 128 00:07:09,551 --> 00:07:13,231 Speaker 3: your children and your legacy to be collateral damage to 129 00:07:13,551 --> 00:07:15,471 Speaker 3: who you're being in the world. And that's been my 130 00:07:15,511 --> 00:07:17,911 Speaker 3: biggest thing. So all the things that I've done, the degrees, 131 00:07:18,711 --> 00:07:24,351 Speaker 3: the awards, the world titles are all possible because I 132 00:07:24,391 --> 00:07:27,831 Speaker 3: took a journey of reclamation and remembering and of regeneration 133 00:07:27,951 --> 00:07:32,271 Speaker 3: of my culture first within my own story. Because a 134 00:07:32,271 --> 00:07:34,711 Speaker 3: cedar tree has to take what it needs from country 135 00:07:34,751 --> 00:07:37,991 Speaker 3: before it can provide shade and fruit to other people. 136 00:07:37,991 --> 00:07:40,671 Speaker 3: And that's not a narrative that women that mothers hear like. 137 00:07:40,751 --> 00:07:43,711 Speaker 3: The narrative that I was given is that as a mother, 138 00:07:43,751 --> 00:07:45,871 Speaker 3: I need to abandon myself in order to be a 139 00:07:45,871 --> 00:07:48,151 Speaker 3: good mum, And in order to be a strong woman 140 00:07:48,271 --> 00:07:51,071 Speaker 3: or a strong leader, you need to burn out. And 141 00:07:51,191 --> 00:07:52,911 Speaker 3: for those that don't know, I just got back from 142 00:07:52,911 --> 00:07:56,431 Speaker 3: a four week trip to America where I had the 143 00:07:56,431 --> 00:07:59,111 Speaker 3: opportunity to speak at the United Nations Permanent Forum of 144 00:07:59,151 --> 00:08:02,271 Speaker 3: Indigenous Issues. A little girl from Dead New South Wales 145 00:08:02,351 --> 00:08:05,471 Speaker 3: or this little bargaging imp girl who's been fighting her 146 00:08:05,511 --> 00:08:08,871 Speaker 3: whole life. And I just went where my ancestors called me. 147 00:08:08,911 --> 00:08:11,591 Speaker 3: I think that's the biggest flex in this life is 148 00:08:11,631 --> 00:08:13,991 Speaker 3: that I'm now just following where the ancestors called me 149 00:08:14,071 --> 00:08:14,351 Speaker 3: to go. 150 00:08:14,711 --> 00:08:17,311 Speaker 1: And what did you speak about at the UN So. 151 00:08:17,471 --> 00:08:19,991 Speaker 3: I was there in my role as the national abordinal 152 00:08:20,031 --> 00:08:23,871 Speaker 3: torrost Rattle and a women's association the Victorian director. 153 00:08:23,951 --> 00:08:25,111 Speaker 1: So they got funding. 154 00:08:24,951 --> 00:08:28,151 Speaker 3: NATSIA, yep, yeah, they got funding to send over three 155 00:08:28,191 --> 00:08:31,831 Speaker 3: delegates to go and gain international experience in the human 156 00:08:31,911 --> 00:08:35,351 Speaker 3: rights space. And when I got the opportunity, I kind 157 00:08:35,351 --> 00:08:37,831 Speaker 3: of questioned it because I was like, why me, Like, 158 00:08:38,151 --> 00:08:42,551 Speaker 3: I'm not in that space and I'm grassroots. And the 159 00:08:42,831 --> 00:08:45,231 Speaker 3: whole tagline from that trip now is that I'm going 160 00:08:45,231 --> 00:08:48,791 Speaker 3: from grassroots to global and weaving it all together. And 161 00:08:49,671 --> 00:08:51,671 Speaker 3: I wasn't originally meant to speak. I was there to 162 00:08:51,711 --> 00:08:54,791 Speaker 3: gain experience. But then being there, we were reminded by 163 00:08:54,791 --> 00:08:55,911 Speaker 3: one of the eldest uncle. 164 00:08:55,751 --> 00:08:58,351 Speaker 1: Les who is Mauser. 165 00:08:58,551 --> 00:09:02,471 Speaker 3: Yes he is a national leader in this space, and 166 00:09:02,511 --> 00:09:04,831 Speaker 3: he reminded us there was a big yarn with like 167 00:09:04,991 --> 00:09:08,351 Speaker 3: justin Muhammad and all these names and hold these big roles, 168 00:09:08,831 --> 00:09:11,951 Speaker 3: and he said, remember first and foremost, you are sovereign 169 00:09:12,031 --> 00:09:14,871 Speaker 3: indigenous people with a responsibility to your communities and to 170 00:09:14,871 --> 00:09:18,111 Speaker 3: your culture and to the next generation before anything else. 171 00:09:18,151 --> 00:09:20,911 Speaker 3: And like stuff like that hits you in the soul 172 00:09:20,951 --> 00:09:23,151 Speaker 3: and I was like, okay, I'm listening, aren't And then 173 00:09:23,151 --> 00:09:25,791 Speaker 3: Hannah McGlade, who is also like an expert in this 174 00:09:25,871 --> 00:09:27,831 Speaker 3: space and has been leading Australia in this space for 175 00:09:27,871 --> 00:09:30,151 Speaker 3: quite a while, she reminded the women that were there. 176 00:09:30,191 --> 00:09:32,951 Speaker 3: So the first two days were around the rights of 177 00:09:32,951 --> 00:09:38,031 Speaker 3: women and girls and the implementation of the Human Rights 178 00:09:38,711 --> 00:09:42,591 Speaker 3: United Declaration of Indigenous Rights ANDRIP as it's called, and 179 00:09:44,071 --> 00:09:48,911 Speaker 3: the General Recommendation thirty nine is as well and from 180 00:09:48,951 --> 00:09:51,231 Speaker 3: seed Or and it was this reminder that we have 181 00:09:51,271 --> 00:09:53,551 Speaker 3: a voice, we have a responsibility, and these moments might 182 00:09:53,591 --> 00:09:55,631 Speaker 3: never come again. We can't just sit back and wait. 183 00:09:55,671 --> 00:09:57,951 Speaker 3: We do not have that luxury to think that there's 184 00:09:57,991 --> 00:09:58,991 Speaker 3: going to be another moment. 185 00:09:59,951 --> 00:10:05,471 Speaker 1: And so you took this opportunity, yeah, to basically tell 186 00:10:05,511 --> 00:10:07,871 Speaker 1: the world on that global stage, on. 187 00:10:07,991 --> 00:10:11,351 Speaker 3: A global stage, that we are not our trauma, that 188 00:10:11,471 --> 00:10:15,311 Speaker 3: as Indigenous women, when an Indigenous woman rises, the world changes. 189 00:10:16,071 --> 00:10:18,671 Speaker 3: And it was this space where I got to tell 190 00:10:18,751 --> 00:10:20,991 Speaker 3: I guess my own story, which is the story of 191 00:10:21,351 --> 00:10:26,431 Speaker 3: thousands of generations since colonialism, of women who have had 192 00:10:26,471 --> 00:10:30,271 Speaker 3: our children taken. Our blood has spilled into the lands 193 00:10:30,311 --> 00:10:32,711 Speaker 3: on which other people's wealth has been built. But we 194 00:10:32,751 --> 00:10:35,711 Speaker 3: are not often beneficiaries. And yet our wealth is still 195 00:10:35,711 --> 00:10:39,111 Speaker 3: within us, of our strength, of our culture and who 196 00:10:39,151 --> 00:10:42,791 Speaker 3: we fight for. And yet we're still expected to carry 197 00:10:42,831 --> 00:10:46,151 Speaker 3: the burden, the burnout, the colonial load, the cultural responsibility, 198 00:10:46,151 --> 00:10:50,431 Speaker 3: the matriarchal responsibility, and yet we do it every single. 199 00:10:50,191 --> 00:10:54,031 Speaker 1: Day, but little recognition, with very little recognition. It's not 200 00:10:54,071 --> 00:10:56,231 Speaker 1: why we do what we do. We do it because 201 00:10:56,271 --> 00:10:58,111 Speaker 1: we're obligated to culturally. 202 00:10:58,271 --> 00:11:00,311 Speaker 3: But it comes with a big cost. To Sis. My 203 00:11:00,391 --> 00:11:03,471 Speaker 3: mum died at forty two. And through the work that 204 00:11:03,511 --> 00:11:06,111 Speaker 3: I I do at the Kilana Foundation, like I'm leading 205 00:11:06,151 --> 00:11:08,591 Speaker 3: young women every single day, and I get messages every 206 00:11:08,591 --> 00:11:11,831 Speaker 3: single day from everyday people who see me getting up 207 00:11:11,831 --> 00:11:14,191 Speaker 3: at three thirty am or four am just to fit 208 00:11:14,231 --> 00:11:16,351 Speaker 3: in everything that I do, and they're like, I don't 209 00:11:16,351 --> 00:11:18,311 Speaker 3: know how you do it, Sis, but you sharing what 210 00:11:18,311 --> 00:11:19,991 Speaker 3: you're doing. It makes me want to do what I 211 00:11:20,751 --> 00:11:24,271 Speaker 3: can do, and it reminded me of that responsibility that 212 00:11:25,391 --> 00:11:28,271 Speaker 3: I don't want to promote this picture of burnout of 213 00:11:28,311 --> 00:11:30,391 Speaker 3: doing it all. It was like for me, it's about 214 00:11:30,431 --> 00:11:32,791 Speaker 3: weaving what I can and doing the best I can 215 00:11:32,831 --> 00:11:35,671 Speaker 3: with what I've got. But I'm also allowed to thrive 216 00:11:35,751 --> 00:11:38,991 Speaker 3: within the legacy and the life that I'm creating. And 217 00:11:39,031 --> 00:11:41,431 Speaker 3: I guess that through all the experiences that I've had, 218 00:11:41,471 --> 00:11:45,471 Speaker 3: from the lateral violence, to the postpartum depression that escalated 219 00:11:45,551 --> 00:11:50,511 Speaker 3: into psychosis, to the depression that led to suicidal ideation 220 00:11:50,671 --> 00:11:54,911 Speaker 3: not once but three times, trying to take my life twice, 221 00:11:55,191 --> 00:11:58,151 Speaker 3: everything kind of came down to that moment, to reminding 222 00:11:58,391 --> 00:12:00,671 Speaker 3: myself and planting a seed in the ground that we 223 00:12:00,711 --> 00:12:03,591 Speaker 3: are not our trauma, and yet we have a responsibilit 224 00:12:03,911 --> 00:12:07,151 Speaker 3: to get up and heal through that. But it's from 225 00:12:07,191 --> 00:12:09,951 Speaker 3: reclaiming who we have always been. It's not about becoming 226 00:12:09,991 --> 00:12:10,631 Speaker 3: someone new. 227 00:12:10,831 --> 00:12:13,511 Speaker 1: So and our culture plays a big role in this. Yes, 228 00:12:14,031 --> 00:12:17,431 Speaker 1: how has culture kind of grounded you? Especially with the 229 00:12:17,431 --> 00:12:18,031 Speaker 1: work that you do? 230 00:12:19,391 --> 00:12:22,871 Speaker 3: Culture? So I was very I'm very grateful to grow 231 00:12:22,951 --> 00:12:26,351 Speaker 3: up knowing that I'm barkaging imprint and being a fair 232 00:12:26,391 --> 00:12:29,071 Speaker 3: skinned Aboriginal woman has come with its own challenges. 233 00:12:29,151 --> 00:12:29,951 Speaker 1: Tell me about it. 234 00:12:29,991 --> 00:12:33,671 Speaker 3: I don't come from a legacy family name, so I've 235 00:12:33,711 --> 00:12:36,871 Speaker 3: had to do that reclaiming myself. So I was very 236 00:12:36,911 --> 00:12:40,391 Speaker 3: fortunate to I couldn't grow up with mum, so Mum 237 00:12:40,511 --> 00:12:43,151 Speaker 3: couldn't get a handle on her own shit. Basically, Mum 238 00:12:43,191 --> 00:12:44,711 Speaker 3: did the best she could, but she was a product 239 00:12:44,711 --> 00:12:47,391 Speaker 3: of her own trauma and her own choices. Yep, because 240 00:12:47,391 --> 00:12:53,471 Speaker 3: I think often when we talk about indigenous spaces, a 241 00:12:53,511 --> 00:12:56,111 Speaker 3: lot is talked about traumering, Yet in the roles that 242 00:12:56,151 --> 00:12:57,311 Speaker 3: we see man no no are there are a lot 243 00:12:57,311 --> 00:12:59,511 Speaker 3: of people who hide behind that too, a lot of 244 00:12:59,551 --> 00:13:01,431 Speaker 3: people who don't want to take responsibility. And I know 245 00:13:01,471 --> 00:13:02,831 Speaker 3: people will come for me for this. 246 00:13:02,751 --> 00:13:04,991 Speaker 1: But but it's true. 247 00:13:05,231 --> 00:13:09,671 Speaker 3: Lateral violence and trauma have been used as excuses and 248 00:13:09,711 --> 00:13:12,911 Speaker 3: as weapons for people to not uphold their responsibilities to 249 00:13:12,991 --> 00:13:14,991 Speaker 3: roles that they choose to take. But when they are 250 00:13:14,991 --> 00:13:18,991 Speaker 3: called out for their responsibility, they don't like it. And 251 00:13:19,271 --> 00:13:22,231 Speaker 3: I don't know why the ancestors called me to this path, 252 00:13:22,271 --> 00:13:25,791 Speaker 3: the dreaming of the Barkagy warrior and this evolution the 253 00:13:25,791 --> 00:13:29,351 Speaker 3: warrior heart that is coming next. But I'm starting to 254 00:13:29,391 --> 00:13:32,151 Speaker 3: accept it and carry the fact that only I can 255 00:13:32,191 --> 00:13:34,191 Speaker 3: do this in the way that I can, and the 256 00:13:34,271 --> 00:13:38,111 Speaker 3: experiences that I've had growing up barking, and I didn't 257 00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:40,391 Speaker 3: know I was an imperor until twenty eighteen because I 258 00:13:40,391 --> 00:13:43,951 Speaker 3: didn't know my maternal grandfather was black until my grandfather 259 00:13:44,031 --> 00:13:48,471 Speaker 3: my grandmother passed away. So yes, my mom and my 260 00:13:48,591 --> 00:13:50,591 Speaker 3: dad are both products of their own trauma in their 261 00:13:50,631 --> 00:13:52,671 Speaker 3: own way. And yet I also know that they did 262 00:13:52,711 --> 00:13:55,751 Speaker 3: the best they could. But what they couldn't do for us, 263 00:13:55,751 --> 00:13:58,271 Speaker 3: and the harm that was done was they couldn't always 264 00:13:58,311 --> 00:14:00,111 Speaker 3: be what we needed, me and my siblings. So that 265 00:14:00,231 --> 00:14:03,751 Speaker 3: meant that as the oldest of my dad's children, the 266 00:14:03,751 --> 00:14:06,391 Speaker 3: oldest in the home, I started helping to support and 267 00:14:06,431 --> 00:14:09,791 Speaker 3: raise my siblings. At the age of six, I first had. 268 00:14:09,951 --> 00:14:12,871 Speaker 1: My were like little adults and training, right we are, 269 00:14:13,391 --> 00:14:17,111 Speaker 1: and we're on girls being little mums yep, and mimicking 270 00:14:17,151 --> 00:14:18,791 Speaker 1: the older women yep, yep. 271 00:14:20,511 --> 00:14:24,831 Speaker 3: And there's a difference between the cultural responsibility and opportunity 272 00:14:25,231 --> 00:14:28,071 Speaker 3: and the toxic overload and the toxic obligation that is 273 00:14:28,111 --> 00:14:31,511 Speaker 3: forced upon us, particularly those of us that carry a 274 00:14:31,551 --> 00:14:34,231 Speaker 3: strength and a capacity that not many can do what 275 00:14:34,271 --> 00:14:37,711 Speaker 3: we do, and yet we are still tasked with carrying 276 00:14:37,711 --> 00:14:39,431 Speaker 3: more than our fair share. And then when we can 277 00:14:39,511 --> 00:14:41,671 Speaker 3: and when we rise up and expect more from others. 278 00:14:41,951 --> 00:14:44,311 Speaker 3: We are often crucified for that, whether it be our 279 00:14:44,351 --> 00:14:47,871 Speaker 3: own mob, other women, or the white systems. So the 280 00:14:47,871 --> 00:14:50,111 Speaker 3: biggest strength we can have is coming together, and yet 281 00:14:50,151 --> 00:14:53,871 Speaker 3: those circles are so small. So for me, two spaces 282 00:14:53,871 --> 00:14:56,551 Speaker 3: that helped me become me and where culture really played 283 00:14:56,551 --> 00:15:00,271 Speaker 3: a space was the took Alina Cumbe Center and the 284 00:15:00,511 --> 00:15:03,151 Speaker 3: Anne Eileen Kirby Drop in Center. And these were spaces 285 00:15:03,191 --> 00:15:07,231 Speaker 3: where I could be black. I didn't have to carry that. 286 00:15:07,511 --> 00:15:10,671 Speaker 3: I didn't have to carry the code to explain that, 287 00:15:10,711 --> 00:15:12,951 Speaker 3: to translate that to other people, and I didn't have 288 00:15:13,031 --> 00:15:16,991 Speaker 3: to code switch there. I could just be this black 289 00:15:17,071 --> 00:15:20,671 Speaker 3: little girl with a big mouth. But being white, I 290 00:15:20,671 --> 00:15:22,551 Speaker 3: didn't fit in with my own mom. I was too 291 00:15:22,551 --> 00:15:25,231 Speaker 3: white when they didn't like me because I was growing 292 00:15:25,311 --> 00:15:27,391 Speaker 3: up different. I had my dad. My dad was the 293 00:15:27,391 --> 00:15:31,151 Speaker 3: one who fought for me. So when I was sexually 294 00:15:31,191 --> 00:15:34,231 Speaker 3: abused in my mum's care and my mum's family chose 295 00:15:34,271 --> 00:15:37,231 Speaker 3: to cover for that and to hide it, my dad 296 00:15:37,311 --> 00:15:39,551 Speaker 3: was the one who came and fought for me. But 297 00:15:39,631 --> 00:15:41,951 Speaker 3: it was my dad's mum. If it wasn't for my 298 00:15:42,031 --> 00:15:44,631 Speaker 3: paternal nan, I wouldn't be the person I am today. 299 00:15:44,711 --> 00:15:47,151 Speaker 3: So she fought in the she fought in the war, 300 00:15:47,231 --> 00:15:49,671 Speaker 3: she was a she was a mechanic during the war, 301 00:15:50,191 --> 00:15:54,431 Speaker 3: and she also supported my grandfather through the through PTSD 302 00:15:54,551 --> 00:15:56,991 Speaker 3: of the impacts of war. And I think all of 303 00:15:57,031 --> 00:16:01,791 Speaker 3: these different threads, but culture spoke to me. Country spoke 304 00:16:01,831 --> 00:16:07,351 Speaker 3: to me like the war. Being a river girl, a 305 00:16:08,231 --> 00:16:11,391 Speaker 3: fresh water country. It was it was culture that always 306 00:16:11,431 --> 00:16:14,911 Speaker 3: called me through, that said, this story isn't yours. Yours 307 00:16:15,071 --> 00:16:17,951 Speaker 3: is something else. And I think being able to hear 308 00:16:17,991 --> 00:16:21,191 Speaker 3: the ancestors from such a young age comes with a responsibility, 309 00:16:21,231 --> 00:16:24,111 Speaker 3: but it's such a gift. So culture grounded me. Culture 310 00:16:24,151 --> 00:16:26,671 Speaker 3: gave me a pathway through. But when people tried to 311 00:16:26,711 --> 00:16:29,151 Speaker 3: tell me what that looked like, it was always this. 312 00:16:29,951 --> 00:16:31,631 Speaker 3: It wasn't something I could put in words. It was 313 00:16:31,671 --> 00:16:33,711 Speaker 3: like my spirit and my body knew that this wasn't 314 00:16:33,711 --> 00:16:36,911 Speaker 3: our story, like this trauma and this deficit, and yet 315 00:16:37,471 --> 00:16:39,951 Speaker 3: that was the only kind of way through. Was these 316 00:16:39,991 --> 00:16:43,391 Speaker 3: contradictory sort of things. I've seen our aunties and uncles 317 00:16:43,391 --> 00:16:49,471 Speaker 3: and parents practicing culture and yet navigating trauma. And it's insufficient. 318 00:16:49,511 --> 00:16:51,111 Speaker 3: So those two places that I grew up in, they 319 00:16:51,111 --> 00:16:54,591 Speaker 3: don't exist because there was insufficient unsustainable funding models. We 320 00:16:54,631 --> 00:16:57,991 Speaker 3: didn't have entrepreneurship as a word back then. We didn't 321 00:16:58,031 --> 00:17:03,391 Speaker 3: have collectives supporting ecosystems and things like that. So politics 322 00:17:03,391 --> 00:17:06,391 Speaker 3: and unsustainable funding models. Yet it planted the seed in 323 00:17:06,471 --> 00:17:09,231 Speaker 3: me to become who I am today. And that's because 324 00:17:09,231 --> 00:17:13,191 Speaker 3: of elders like Annie Sharon Kirby and my stepmom Gloria 325 00:17:13,231 --> 00:17:16,071 Speaker 3: Spencer who wrapped around me at times that I needed it, 326 00:17:16,511 --> 00:17:19,151 Speaker 3: and my nan being that solid person in my life saying, yeah, 327 00:17:19,191 --> 00:17:21,111 Speaker 3: you got shit going on, but you've got a responsibility. 328 00:17:21,111 --> 00:17:23,631 Speaker 1: Girl, get up, Get up, yeap, go take care of 329 00:17:23,671 --> 00:17:24,031 Speaker 1: your shit. 330 00:17:24,151 --> 00:17:27,071 Speaker 3: Yeah. And you've got children, yes, tell me. 331 00:17:27,071 --> 00:17:29,471 Speaker 1: About your children, and I know your auntie and mum 332 00:17:29,591 --> 00:17:33,111 Speaker 1: to the whole community. Yes, But in terms of your children, 333 00:17:33,271 --> 00:17:36,631 Speaker 1: you've inspired them to change their dreams. I seen one 334 00:17:36,631 --> 00:17:40,311 Speaker 1: of your girls competing. What is she doing? Jiu jitsu? 335 00:17:40,671 --> 00:17:41,151 Speaker 3: Of course? 336 00:17:42,591 --> 00:17:45,311 Speaker 1: How did she get into jiu jitsu? Was you like 337 00:17:45,351 --> 00:17:46,951 Speaker 1: this is what you're gonna do? Would she one day 338 00:17:47,071 --> 00:17:49,911 Speaker 1: say Mom, I want to do this sport? 339 00:17:50,031 --> 00:17:50,111 Speaker 3: Like? 340 00:17:50,191 --> 00:17:51,311 Speaker 1: How did that happen for her? 341 00:17:52,151 --> 00:17:59,511 Speaker 3: Look? My babies grew up on the mats and being 342 00:17:59,511 --> 00:18:03,991 Speaker 3: a mum is really hard. And no one kind of 343 00:18:04,031 --> 00:18:08,311 Speaker 3: tells you when you're called to something bigger than yourself 344 00:18:08,351 --> 00:18:11,711 Speaker 3: that it can come at a cost a lot across it. 345 00:18:11,951 --> 00:18:15,631 Speaker 3: Some people don't want to see, like my children have 346 00:18:15,711 --> 00:18:20,391 Speaker 3: had to sacrifice so much and pay a big price 347 00:18:20,551 --> 00:18:24,271 Speaker 3: being my child and to hold you, to hold me, 348 00:18:24,871 --> 00:18:27,711 Speaker 3: but also to not have me at times so when 349 00:18:27,711 --> 00:18:31,551 Speaker 3: they needed me. And I now can acknowledge I didn't 350 00:18:31,631 --> 00:18:34,551 Speaker 3: understand at the time, but I can acknowledge the impact 351 00:18:34,911 --> 00:18:37,191 Speaker 3: me being me has had on my children, both positive 352 00:18:37,191 --> 00:18:39,911 Speaker 3: and negative. And I couldn't always be there, and I 353 00:18:39,991 --> 00:18:42,791 Speaker 3: think that's the reason for the tears. It's something that 354 00:18:42,791 --> 00:18:48,951 Speaker 3: I'm still reckoning with. So my eldest daughter is eighteen now, 355 00:18:48,991 --> 00:18:52,871 Speaker 3: she's finished school and growing up on the mat. So 356 00:18:53,231 --> 00:18:57,031 Speaker 3: she grew up seeing me fight like my twins did 357 00:18:57,071 --> 00:18:59,631 Speaker 3: as well. So I was nineteen when I started jiu jitsu. 358 00:18:59,751 --> 00:19:02,071 Speaker 3: So I got introduced to jiu jitsu and martial arts 359 00:19:02,071 --> 00:19:04,351 Speaker 3: when I was nineteen because I was too busy getting 360 00:19:04,391 --> 00:19:04,911 Speaker 3: into fights. 361 00:19:05,431 --> 00:19:09,391 Speaker 1: So for me to take out yeah, frustration and anger. 362 00:19:09,471 --> 00:19:11,071 Speaker 3: I used to do it in the nightclubs and at 363 00:19:11,071 --> 00:19:13,871 Speaker 3: school in the school yard. And then someone said, come on, Shan, 364 00:19:13,951 --> 00:19:16,151 Speaker 3: you've got too much potential to be doing this. Go 365 00:19:16,191 --> 00:19:18,991 Speaker 3: and learn us, ye need something. And the funny thing is, 366 00:19:19,351 --> 00:19:21,471 Speaker 3: I'm not one of those black fellows that's good at sports. 367 00:19:21,591 --> 00:19:23,831 Speaker 3: Is like, I'm not. I don't know where the jeans where, 368 00:19:23,871 --> 00:19:26,271 Speaker 3: must have gone to my brothers or something. But for 369 00:19:26,311 --> 00:19:29,711 Speaker 3: me to be sitting here saying I'm a black belt 370 00:19:29,871 --> 00:19:31,791 Speaker 3: and a three time world champion, not a black belt 371 00:19:31,791 --> 00:19:34,431 Speaker 3: WORL champion, yet that's the one to come uh ah. 372 00:19:34,671 --> 00:19:38,311 Speaker 3: So to space everyone, Yeah, there's there's stuff coming you mob. 373 00:19:38,751 --> 00:19:43,991 Speaker 3: So my daughter and my twins started training jiu jitsu 374 00:19:44,031 --> 00:19:47,991 Speaker 3: when they were about seven and nine, and like they're strong. 375 00:19:48,191 --> 00:19:51,191 Speaker 3: My babies are just physically strong. So some people like 376 00:19:51,271 --> 00:19:54,431 Speaker 3: naturally flexible, some are naturally strong, and some are naturally athletics. 377 00:19:54,511 --> 00:19:57,071 Speaker 3: So my daughter took after her dad, like she's very 378 00:19:57,151 --> 00:20:00,311 Speaker 3: naturally talented, was picking up the sport. But she's got 379 00:20:00,311 --> 00:20:02,911 Speaker 3: this staunchness. And my kids are also Pacific Islander as well, 380 00:20:02,991 --> 00:20:07,391 Speaker 3: so very that's to the matriarchal cultures. And there's photos 381 00:20:07,431 --> 00:20:08,951 Speaker 3: of my daughter and I was like, she makes me 382 00:20:09,231 --> 00:20:12,911 Speaker 3: look like i'msoft, like just the fierceness on her face. 383 00:20:12,951 --> 00:20:14,311 Speaker 3: I was like, I'd hate to have to come up 384 00:20:14,351 --> 00:20:15,271 Speaker 3: across her in a battle. 385 00:20:15,311 --> 00:20:17,751 Speaker 1: But so she won something recently. 386 00:20:17,751 --> 00:20:20,791 Speaker 3: Not recently so be she prioritized school the last two years. 387 00:20:20,831 --> 00:20:24,831 Speaker 3: But twenty twenty one and twenty twenty two she competed 388 00:20:24,871 --> 00:20:27,951 Speaker 3: at the World Championships and she came home a two 389 00:20:27,991 --> 00:20:31,151 Speaker 3: tomes bronze medalist both times in the Juvenile Blue Belt Worlds. 390 00:20:31,231 --> 00:20:34,751 Speaker 3: So she created her own pathway. And I don't think 391 00:20:34,831 --> 00:20:36,471 Speaker 3: I think it was built off of the seed that 392 00:20:36,511 --> 00:20:39,471 Speaker 3: I planted, but I cleared the pathway for her to 393 00:20:39,511 --> 00:20:43,631 Speaker 3: become whoever she wanted to be, and she took that up. 394 00:20:43,671 --> 00:20:46,471 Speaker 3: My son now plays basketball and is aiming for like 395 00:20:46,511 --> 00:20:51,471 Speaker 3: an elite level, and they I guess we created the pathway, 396 00:20:51,471 --> 00:20:54,431 Speaker 3: but we role modeled success. Like there's a video of 397 00:20:54,471 --> 00:20:58,791 Speaker 3: my daughter when up from the twenty twenty eighteen Conworth Games. 398 00:20:58,791 --> 00:21:01,431 Speaker 3: We were interviewed for that, and there's a video of 399 00:21:01,471 --> 00:21:04,431 Speaker 3: my daughter saying to everyone else like, wow, that's and 400 00:21:04,471 --> 00:21:06,191 Speaker 3: she's like but to us, that's just mum. Like, so 401 00:21:06,391 --> 00:21:08,591 Speaker 3: I've normalized this in my household. Me being a world 402 00:21:08,631 --> 00:21:12,311 Speaker 3: champion is nothing special in my household. Literally, my kids community, 403 00:21:12,751 --> 00:21:16,311 Speaker 3: You're just I'm just Ani Shan like me. Being a 404 00:21:16,351 --> 00:21:19,351 Speaker 3: world champion or coming home with another title is exactly 405 00:21:19,391 --> 00:21:21,831 Speaker 3: that to my kids, whether it's my nieces and nephews, 406 00:21:21,871 --> 00:21:25,631 Speaker 3: Ani Shan's kids or Nummiker's kids, it's literally that's just 407 00:21:25,671 --> 00:21:27,911 Speaker 3: what you do Onni Shan like what special, like show 408 00:21:27,991 --> 00:21:30,751 Speaker 3: us something different, And that's. 409 00:21:30,831 --> 00:21:34,711 Speaker 1: A big part of your work. You're in community. You've 410 00:21:34,711 --> 00:21:37,911 Speaker 1: set up a foundation. I see that space that you've 411 00:21:37,951 --> 00:21:44,791 Speaker 1: created culturally safe. You're keeping these kids safe. Yeah, and 412 00:21:44,991 --> 00:21:47,831 Speaker 1: what do you do with them? Do you put on programs, 413 00:21:47,871 --> 00:21:50,351 Speaker 1: do you do weaving? What are some of the activities 414 00:21:50,391 --> 00:21:53,231 Speaker 1: that you do with these kids to teach them culture 415 00:21:53,271 --> 00:21:55,911 Speaker 1: and to teach them that they're loved or show them 416 00:21:55,911 --> 00:21:56,551 Speaker 1: that they're loved. 417 00:21:57,511 --> 00:22:00,191 Speaker 3: So the Kilna Foundation kill Ana means growing in bark 418 00:22:00,231 --> 00:22:02,431 Speaker 3: and gy is something that's been in my spirits since 419 00:22:02,471 --> 00:22:05,551 Speaker 3: I was fifteen, and it came It was kind of 420 00:22:05,591 --> 00:22:07,991 Speaker 3: brought out of this moment where I had two teachers. 421 00:22:08,031 --> 00:22:09,551 Speaker 3: I had a teacher tell me I was more likely 422 00:22:09,551 --> 00:22:11,071 Speaker 3: to end up dead or pregnant than I was to 423 00:22:11,111 --> 00:22:14,591 Speaker 3: finish school because statistics were against me. Well, she got 424 00:22:14,591 --> 00:22:16,631 Speaker 3: some very colorful language and probably didn't come near me 425 00:22:16,671 --> 00:22:18,511 Speaker 3: again for the rest of my schooling experience, I can 426 00:22:18,551 --> 00:22:20,871 Speaker 3: tell you that. But then I had this other teacher 427 00:22:21,031 --> 00:22:22,591 Speaker 3: kind of tell me she'd been trying to help me 428 00:22:22,631 --> 00:22:25,271 Speaker 3: for six months, but you know, me being cocky but 429 00:22:25,351 --> 00:22:27,431 Speaker 3: being having a lot of trauma, having all these walls up, 430 00:22:27,431 --> 00:22:29,551 Speaker 3: I didn't see it as that, and she got so 431 00:22:29,591 --> 00:22:32,071 Speaker 3: frustrated with me one day. I can't remember her name, 432 00:22:32,071 --> 00:22:33,631 Speaker 3: but I can still remember the tears in her eyes, 433 00:22:33,671 --> 00:22:35,831 Speaker 3: and she said to me, Chantel, you got your head 434 00:22:35,831 --> 00:22:37,511 Speaker 3: stuck so far up your own asset. You're a part 435 00:22:37,511 --> 00:22:39,751 Speaker 3: of your own problem, Like you've got all this potential, 436 00:22:39,831 --> 00:22:43,951 Speaker 3: but you're just coming at this. She gave me that 437 00:22:43,991 --> 00:22:46,791 Speaker 3: black Auntie love, and she wasn't black, And if anyone 438 00:22:46,871 --> 00:22:49,111 Speaker 3: knows what that means, they'll know what it means. And 439 00:22:49,151 --> 00:22:51,351 Speaker 3: the person who gives me that these days is only 440 00:22:51,391 --> 00:22:55,231 Speaker 3: Karen Demory. But long story short, I knew that I 441 00:22:55,311 --> 00:22:57,271 Speaker 3: was going to create something for young mob but I 442 00:22:57,311 --> 00:23:00,351 Speaker 3: also understood, even at a young age, that I needed 443 00:23:00,351 --> 00:23:03,071 Speaker 3: to be an example of what I wanted for others, 444 00:23:03,111 --> 00:23:04,711 Speaker 3: because I I didn't want to be gam and I 445 00:23:04,711 --> 00:23:07,431 Speaker 3: didn't want to be contradictory to say to other people, 446 00:23:07,471 --> 00:23:09,111 Speaker 3: you know you can be and do anything you want, 447 00:23:09,511 --> 00:23:11,711 Speaker 3: And even at that young age, I somehow had this 448 00:23:11,831 --> 00:23:15,071 Speaker 3: knowledge that I needed to empower the individual but also 449 00:23:15,151 --> 00:23:17,431 Speaker 3: shift and challenge the systems that can break us or 450 00:23:17,431 --> 00:23:20,031 Speaker 3: hold us down. So I was originally my original pathway. 451 00:23:20,031 --> 00:23:22,271 Speaker 3: I was going to be a teacher, and I knew 452 00:23:22,271 --> 00:23:25,031 Speaker 3: I wanted to work with kids like myself. So kids 453 00:23:25,071 --> 00:23:27,991 Speaker 3: who sat in this messy middle had all this potential 454 00:23:28,031 --> 00:23:30,831 Speaker 3: but also had all this trauma and all this lived 455 00:23:30,911 --> 00:23:34,191 Speaker 3: experience of I've gone, well, that's not possible for someone 456 00:23:34,351 --> 00:23:37,111 Speaker 3: like me, Like I never had anyone in my world 457 00:23:37,111 --> 00:23:39,991 Speaker 3: that was starting businesses, that was an elite athlete that 458 00:23:40,791 --> 00:23:43,191 Speaker 3: I wasn't told that these dreams were even allowed for me, 459 00:23:43,351 --> 00:23:47,351 Speaker 3: let alone possible. So it was at that age and 460 00:23:47,351 --> 00:23:49,271 Speaker 3: then it's kind of had as different iterations. But in 461 00:23:49,311 --> 00:23:52,911 Speaker 3: twenty twenty, when I moved home during COVID, I got pissed. 462 00:23:52,991 --> 00:23:56,071 Speaker 3: I got angry at my community and at the echoes 463 00:23:56,111 --> 00:23:58,711 Speaker 3: and at the orcs because there was no active youth 464 00:23:58,751 --> 00:24:02,991 Speaker 3: space that wasn't attached to crisis and case management or leadership. 465 00:24:03,671 --> 00:24:05,551 Speaker 3: One of the kids that had all this potential and 466 00:24:05,591 --> 00:24:08,431 Speaker 3: families that were trying, but also there was no access 467 00:24:08,471 --> 00:24:11,631 Speaker 3: to culture that wasn't attached to politics or attached to 468 00:24:11,711 --> 00:24:14,031 Speaker 3: family tie. So if you weren't a family that had 469 00:24:14,311 --> 00:24:16,871 Speaker 3: culture in your family, there was nowhere to go like 470 00:24:17,071 --> 00:24:20,431 Speaker 3: parents and families yearning for culture. All the research tells 471 00:24:20,511 --> 00:24:23,711 Speaker 3: us that culture and community are the answer, and yet 472 00:24:23,751 --> 00:24:26,551 Speaker 3: there was nowhere to access that. So five months pregnant 473 00:24:26,591 --> 00:24:29,071 Speaker 3: with my son, I went forget. I'm gonna do something 474 00:24:29,111 --> 00:24:30,831 Speaker 3: about it. And I think that's the difference, and I 475 00:24:30,831 --> 00:24:33,511 Speaker 3: think that's what entrepreneurship has taught me, is to just 476 00:24:33,551 --> 00:24:35,031 Speaker 3: get up and do it. But it was more than that, 477 00:24:35,111 --> 00:24:37,231 Speaker 3: this was a calling. I sat there and argued with 478 00:24:37,271 --> 00:24:39,111 Speaker 3: their ancestors. I said, I don't want to do this. 479 00:24:39,111 --> 00:24:40,311 Speaker 3: It's not the right time. 480 00:24:40,151 --> 00:24:41,991 Speaker 1: Because this is twenty four or seven works. 481 00:24:42,071 --> 00:24:44,391 Speaker 3: Yes, it's and that's the thing special in your base regionally, 482 00:24:44,471 --> 00:24:46,511 Speaker 3: like it runs into you in the supermarket and it's 483 00:24:46,631 --> 00:24:49,871 Speaker 3: and it's a it's a big responsibility because these kids 484 00:24:49,871 --> 00:24:51,991 Speaker 3: don't You're not just Ani Shan or Nummi kid to them, 485 00:24:52,191 --> 00:24:54,591 Speaker 3: but they're witnessing what you're doing. They follow you, like 486 00:24:54,671 --> 00:24:58,711 Speaker 3: these kids talk my socials. They're always watching what Anishan's doing. 487 00:24:59,431 --> 00:25:01,911 Speaker 3: So it came with this responsibility that who I was 488 00:25:01,911 --> 00:25:03,471 Speaker 3: trying to tell them to be I had to be 489 00:25:03,471 --> 00:25:06,231 Speaker 3: doing on that work in myself. So in twenty twenty, 490 00:25:06,231 --> 00:25:09,551 Speaker 3: we started with one school session, after school session to 491 00:25:09,631 --> 00:25:12,791 Speaker 3: make it accessible, and it was an after school session 492 00:25:12,871 --> 00:25:15,831 Speaker 3: for girls, and I gave them the space. So my 493 00:25:15,991 --> 00:25:19,151 Speaker 3: kid's words now is Anishan's the ATM and the bus driver. 494 00:25:19,191 --> 00:25:21,551 Speaker 3: We're the GPS because I said, you need to tell 495 00:25:21,591 --> 00:25:23,671 Speaker 3: me what you want. I know what you need, but 496 00:25:23,711 --> 00:25:25,511 Speaker 3: you need to tell me what you want and what 497 00:25:25,551 --> 00:25:28,551 Speaker 3: that looks like. Our first session we had thirty girls 498 00:25:28,591 --> 00:25:31,031 Speaker 3: walk through the door. So in eighteen months, we had 499 00:25:31,031 --> 00:25:33,831 Speaker 3: over two hundred girls walk through our door two days 500 00:25:33,871 --> 00:25:36,231 Speaker 3: a week, and I was driving my own car most 501 00:25:36,231 --> 00:25:38,551 Speaker 3: of the time or borrow on something funding it most 502 00:25:38,591 --> 00:25:41,591 Speaker 3: of the time, myself two days a week after we're 503 00:25:41,671 --> 00:25:46,111 Speaker 3: pregnant with son delivering this program, and then it just 504 00:25:46,151 --> 00:25:48,711 Speaker 3: evolved from there. So it's a space where they can 505 00:25:48,711 --> 00:25:50,911 Speaker 3: connect to themselves. So we're it big on self development. 506 00:25:50,911 --> 00:25:54,231 Speaker 3: I'm big on personal agency. It's big on them finding 507 00:25:54,271 --> 00:25:57,911 Speaker 3: a sense of purpose and meaning within themselves. And I 508 00:25:57,951 --> 00:26:00,591 Speaker 3: find that this has been the case with myself and 509 00:26:00,671 --> 00:26:03,071 Speaker 3: everything that I've kind of looked at is when a 510 00:26:03,071 --> 00:26:05,591 Speaker 3: person has a sense of their own identity. They have 511 00:26:05,631 --> 00:26:07,871 Speaker 3: a sense of belief in themselves but also in their 512 00:26:07,911 --> 00:26:10,791 Speaker 3: capacity to do something. But they have something that is 513 00:26:10,831 --> 00:26:14,151 Speaker 3: bigger than themselves worth fighting for. Then it gives them 514 00:26:14,151 --> 00:26:19,071 Speaker 3: a pathway through anything trauma, suicide, violence, And that's what 515 00:26:19,151 --> 00:26:22,271 Speaker 3: kilana is. It's not about leadership because leadership has put 516 00:26:22,271 --> 00:26:24,151 Speaker 3: too much on our kids. They put up on too 517 00:26:24,191 --> 00:26:26,271 Speaker 3: many pedestals and there's no room from the muck up. 518 00:26:26,631 --> 00:26:29,031 Speaker 3: And we can see that with leaders like look what 519 00:26:29,071 --> 00:26:32,111 Speaker 3: HadAM happen to? Adam Goods and a few others that 520 00:26:32,111 --> 00:26:34,871 Speaker 3: have been vilified for taking up that space right and 521 00:26:34,911 --> 00:26:38,111 Speaker 3: then when they become human or fallible, they get crucified 522 00:26:38,151 --> 00:26:41,031 Speaker 3: for it in the public eye. And I was like, no, 523 00:26:41,191 --> 00:26:43,631 Speaker 3: this isn't about leadership. But it's also not about crisis 524 00:26:43,711 --> 00:26:46,551 Speaker 3: or case management. So we break through victim mentality, we 525 00:26:46,711 --> 00:26:49,071 Speaker 3: break through entitlement. We give them a sense of who 526 00:26:49,111 --> 00:26:51,791 Speaker 3: they want to be. We give them role models who 527 00:26:51,871 --> 00:26:53,871 Speaker 3: can show them that they can be and do anything. 528 00:26:54,391 --> 00:26:56,311 Speaker 3: But then we also go, if you want more, you 529 00:26:56,311 --> 00:26:58,151 Speaker 3: can have it and we're here for you. But also 530 00:26:58,511 --> 00:27:00,671 Speaker 3: so we've got kids out stealing cars and then five 531 00:27:00,671 --> 00:27:04,191 Speaker 3: minutes later, they're in Kilerlana doing like sitting there because 532 00:27:04,191 --> 00:27:05,671 Speaker 3: we've have a saying leave your shit at the door, 533 00:27:05,871 --> 00:27:07,231 Speaker 3: and I've had people ring me and say, oh, you 534 00:27:07,311 --> 00:27:08,751 Speaker 3: know your kid was doing this and I said, ann, 535 00:27:08,831 --> 00:27:11,271 Speaker 3: they didn't steal my car. I'm not here to do 536 00:27:11,311 --> 00:27:13,471 Speaker 3: that work. There's other people funded for that. We are 537 00:27:13,551 --> 00:27:15,831 Speaker 3: just a space and then for those that want more, 538 00:27:15,871 --> 00:27:18,871 Speaker 3: so we provide role models. We provide a space for 539 00:27:18,951 --> 00:27:22,511 Speaker 3: reclamation of culture away from politics and funding models. But 540 00:27:22,591 --> 00:27:26,911 Speaker 3: also we've refuse to prostitute our kids trauma to get funding, 541 00:27:26,911 --> 00:27:28,671 Speaker 3: and that's probably why it's been a little bit harder 542 00:27:28,711 --> 00:27:31,151 Speaker 3: to get support because we haven't danced to that tune 543 00:27:31,911 --> 00:27:35,591 Speaker 3: I because of who I am as well. But you 544 00:27:35,631 --> 00:27:37,431 Speaker 3: know what, we've had girls. I've got one girl in 545 00:27:37,551 --> 00:27:40,911 Speaker 3: university who got that direct opportunity because of what we've done. 546 00:27:41,151 --> 00:27:43,311 Speaker 3: I've got one young woman who's twenty one and is 547 00:27:43,391 --> 00:27:46,551 Speaker 3: leading our program and she came through the program. So 548 00:27:46,551 --> 00:27:50,631 Speaker 3: we're doing succession planning, we're doing legacy building one girl 549 00:27:50,671 --> 00:27:53,231 Speaker 3: at a time, and it's about empowering that individual to 550 00:27:53,311 --> 00:27:56,951 Speaker 3: be their own warrior, to be their own leaders, their 551 00:27:56,991 --> 00:28:00,711 Speaker 3: own person first before they're expected to lead the world. 552 00:28:00,671 --> 00:28:03,991 Speaker 1: And that's what I wanted to kind of yeah, like 553 00:28:04,151 --> 00:28:06,111 Speaker 1: end this yar whe or wrap this yarn up with 554 00:28:06,711 --> 00:28:10,871 Speaker 1: what are yours? What's some key messages to some of 555 00:28:10,871 --> 00:28:14,151 Speaker 1: the young mob that are listening to this podcast right now? 556 00:28:14,391 --> 00:28:15,791 Speaker 1: What do you want to share with them before we 557 00:28:15,831 --> 00:28:16,311 Speaker 1: wrap up? 558 00:28:16,591 --> 00:28:21,951 Speaker 3: As Anishan as just a normal everyday woman, Like for me, 559 00:28:22,031 --> 00:28:23,831 Speaker 3: I really had to go what did this all come 560 00:28:23,871 --> 00:28:27,431 Speaker 3: down to? You? Like? How did I overcome suicide? How 561 00:28:27,471 --> 00:28:31,911 Speaker 3: did I end a twenty year relationship that was acting 562 00:28:31,911 --> 00:28:34,831 Speaker 3: out family violence that I didn't recognize? How did I 563 00:28:34,871 --> 00:28:37,071 Speaker 3: have the courage to walk away and stand alone in 564 00:28:37,111 --> 00:28:39,791 Speaker 3: a world that told me who I could be and 565 00:28:40,071 --> 00:28:42,711 Speaker 3: risk everything to go No, this is who I am? 566 00:28:43,111 --> 00:28:45,831 Speaker 3: Was the warrior heart because so many people say, just 567 00:28:45,831 --> 00:28:48,431 Speaker 3: be yourself in the world. But in order to be 568 00:28:48,551 --> 00:28:50,431 Speaker 3: yourself in the world, you have to know who you are. 569 00:28:50,951 --> 00:28:53,151 Speaker 3: You have to know who your what your power is, 570 00:28:53,351 --> 00:28:55,031 Speaker 3: you need to know what your truth is. Because our 571 00:28:55,071 --> 00:28:58,711 Speaker 3: heart bypasses our ego and our trauma. But in order 572 00:28:58,751 --> 00:29:00,111 Speaker 3: to be ourselves in the world, we have to be 573 00:29:00,151 --> 00:29:04,511 Speaker 3: willing to fight for ourselves. And you are worth fighting 574 00:29:04,551 --> 00:29:07,751 Speaker 3: for and you are worth knowing who you are because 575 00:29:08,071 --> 00:29:11,471 Speaker 3: who you are is going to ripple out into the children, 576 00:29:11,591 --> 00:29:13,831 Speaker 3: out into your families and your communities. And often we're 577 00:29:13,871 --> 00:29:16,951 Speaker 3: so externally focused on our mob especially as young Black fellows, 578 00:29:16,951 --> 00:29:18,711 Speaker 3: like all of our kids, I want to do this 579 00:29:18,751 --> 00:29:22,191 Speaker 3: for my family. Come back to yourself, Come home to yourself, 580 00:29:22,231 --> 00:29:25,031 Speaker 3: and make yourself solid and strong. Look at country them 581 00:29:25,071 --> 00:29:27,391 Speaker 3: trees have to take what they need first from country 582 00:29:27,431 --> 00:29:31,591 Speaker 3: before they can produce shade and provide fruit, especially legacy 583 00:29:31,631 --> 00:29:34,511 Speaker 3: sort of stuff like generational stuff. When we come home 584 00:29:34,551 --> 00:29:37,751 Speaker 3: and we make ourselves well first, When we come home 585 00:29:37,751 --> 00:29:40,471 Speaker 3: and fight for ourselves and be ourselves in the world, 586 00:29:40,951 --> 00:29:43,111 Speaker 3: that's the greatest truth, especially as Black fellows. When I 587 00:29:43,151 --> 00:29:46,151 Speaker 3: can walk into any room barefoot, whether I'm on a 588 00:29:46,191 --> 00:29:49,271 Speaker 3: global stage of the United Nations or I'm on a 589 00:29:49,431 --> 00:29:52,031 Speaker 3: global stage of competing in jiu jitsu, or walking into 590 00:29:52,111 --> 00:29:54,831 Speaker 3: my home or walking into kilana, I can just be 591 00:29:54,991 --> 00:29:57,351 Speaker 3: myself in the world. And that's that warrior heart, knowing 592 00:29:57,351 --> 00:29:59,751 Speaker 3: who I am. And when we can do that, that 593 00:29:59,831 --> 00:30:03,271 Speaker 3: is the greatest healing. It is the greatest pathway to culture, 594 00:30:03,311 --> 00:30:05,791 Speaker 3: and it is the greatest pathway to our freedom, our 595 00:30:05,831 --> 00:30:09,631 Speaker 3: self determination and sovereignty. As first nations, mob to ourselves 596 00:30:09,631 --> 00:30:11,391 Speaker 3: first before we try to give it to our mob 597 00:30:11,471 --> 00:30:12,831 Speaker 3: and our families and our collective. 598 00:30:12,991 --> 00:30:15,391 Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, we're going to have to do part three. 599 00:30:16,991 --> 00:30:18,751 Speaker 1: I knew this was going to be a big yard, 600 00:30:18,791 --> 00:30:20,711 Speaker 1: and I knew you'd be able to share so much 601 00:30:20,711 --> 00:30:23,351 Speaker 1: in such a short amount of time. But we have 602 00:30:23,471 --> 00:30:28,271 Speaker 1: run out of time, and it's terrible. But I just 603 00:30:28,311 --> 00:30:32,271 Speaker 1: want to say it's been an absolute privilege to have 604 00:30:32,391 --> 00:30:36,111 Speaker 1: you back to share what you've been doing since five 605 00:30:36,191 --> 00:30:40,431 Speaker 1: years ago. And you know, watch out, yeah, people, you know, 606 00:30:40,951 --> 00:30:43,911 Speaker 1: stay tuned for people. There's our show notes, so people 607 00:30:43,951 --> 00:30:46,471 Speaker 1: can reach out and follow your journey. And for anyone 608 00:30:46,511 --> 00:30:49,871 Speaker 1: that's listening that want to back a grassroots community and 609 00:30:49,991 --> 00:30:55,311 Speaker 1: invest in young women, then your foundation is a no brainer. 610 00:30:55,511 --> 00:30:57,951 Speaker 3: Well, they can either fund the vision or the visionary like, 611 00:30:57,991 --> 00:31:00,511 Speaker 3: because I think both both are worth investing in. And 612 00:31:00,551 --> 00:31:03,631 Speaker 3: I'm taking this stuff global, like the new tagline fulling 613 00:31:03,751 --> 00:31:07,591 Speaker 3: din is weaving, the weaving the warrior heart grassroots to global. 614 00:31:07,871 --> 00:31:10,911 Speaker 1: There you go. Well, I'll see you on LinkedIn Dondale 615 00:31:10,911 --> 00:31:13,711 Speaker 1: and see you more too, deadly. Thank you for coming 616 00:31:13,751 --> 00:31:17,391 Speaker 1: all the way down here to have this yarn. I 617 00:31:17,871 --> 00:31:21,711 Speaker 1: know that you've added a lot of value to this 618 00:31:21,831 --> 00:31:27,351 Speaker 1: really important conversation around building mental fitness, building your emotional 619 00:31:27,711 --> 00:31:32,111 Speaker 1: and mental muscles, and just inspiring not just this generation, 620 00:31:32,511 --> 00:31:33,671 Speaker 1: but generations to come. 621 00:31:33,711 --> 00:31:35,871 Speaker 3: So thank you, no, thank you sis, and thank you 622 00:31:35,991 --> 00:31:38,191 Speaker 3: to Gotcha for life for doing this important work and 623 00:31:38,231 --> 00:31:43,071 Speaker 3: opening themselves up to the responsibility to weave ancient principles 624 00:31:43,111 --> 00:31:45,951 Speaker 3: and practices of doing well being and thriving in a 625 00:31:45,951 --> 00:31:47,751 Speaker 3: different landscape and a different language. 626 00:31:47,911 --> 00:31:50,751 Speaker 1: Yes, there's more to come done, and I'm sure we're 627 00:31:50,751 --> 00:31:51,631 Speaker 1: going to be seeing you more. 628 00:31:52,511 --> 00:31:57,231 Speaker 2: Thank you, my sister, Thank you, Thanks for tuning in 629 00:31:57,271 --> 00:32:01,231 Speaker 2: to mental fitness conversations. Keep building your emotional muscles with 630 00:32:01,271 --> 00:32:04,471 Speaker 2: the free mental Fitness Jim packed with two rules, tips 631 00:32:04,511 --> 00:32:08,351 Speaker 2: and everyday actions to support your mental fitness. Download it 632 00:32:08,391 --> 00:32:11,031 Speaker 2: from the App Store or Google Play Store or visit 633 00:32:11,111 --> 00:32:15,191 Speaker 2: the Mentalfitnessgym dot org. If anything in this episode brought 634 00:32:15,271 --> 00:32:17,711 Speaker 2: something up for you, you don't have to worry alone. 635 00:32:17,831 --> 00:32:20,751 Speaker 2: Reach out to a trusted friend or family member and 636 00:32:20,871 --> 00:32:24,431 Speaker 2: know that support is available. You can contact Lifeline on 637 00:32:24,431 --> 00:32:27,591 Speaker 2: one three, double one one four or one three yarn 638 00:32:27,751 --> 00:32:31,071 Speaker 2: at one three nine, two seven six for free and 639 00:32:31,191 --> 00:32:35,711 Speaker 2: confidential support for Aboriginal and Torrostraight Islander people. If you 640 00:32:35,831 --> 00:32:38,471 Speaker 2: enjoyed this episode, leave us a rating, share it with 641 00:32:38,511 --> 00:32:41,151 Speaker 2: someone in your village, or drop us a message. We'd 642 00:32:41,191 --> 00:32:43,311 Speaker 2: love to hear what you think, and don't forget to 643 00:32:43,351 --> 00:32:46,191 Speaker 2: follow Black Magic Woman and Gotcha for Life on all 644 00:32:46,231 --> 00:32:48,351 Speaker 2: socials to keep the conversation going