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Speaker 1: I see you're really holding onto the painter's pants.

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Speaker 2: I like the pants.

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Speaker 1: Is it so that when you're out in public you'd

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Speaker 1: be like I once.

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Speaker 2: I want to look I want to look like I've

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Speaker 2: built things in my bare hands.

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Speaker 1: Matt Ashton, There's one thing I've noticed about myself now

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Speaker 1: that I am a homeowner instead of a home renter.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, congratulations, thank you.

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Speaker 1: It has been a little while those of you who

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Speaker 1: are catching up. But I am not afraid to put

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Speaker 1: holes in the wall now. Yes, and I feel it's

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Speaker 1: a privilege. Oscar, I drew this for you. Firstly, that's

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Speaker 1: a garbage drawing. Just pin it on the wall. You

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Speaker 1: know what.

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Speaker 2: The three hooks are gone.

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Speaker 1: Oh no, I'm just got it. Literally the drill. Every

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Speaker 1: two days, the drill's coming out, but it's mainly thumbtacks.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, ah fuck it.

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Speaker 2: Welcome back to two Going Dads.

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Speaker 1: I'm MADJ and I'm Ash and this is.

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Speaker 2: A podcast all about parenting.

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Speaker 3: It is the good, it is.

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Speaker 2: The bad and relatable and one thing, Ash nigh we

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Speaker 2: swore together. We made an oath. We cut our hands,

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Speaker 2: blood was dripping, put them together, and we said we

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Speaker 2: will never give advice.

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Speaker 1: That was a hell of an infection.

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Speaker 2: For a bit tired. It's been a big old week.

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Speaker 1: I did notice the week. The phone to me this

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Speaker 1: morning and I'm.

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Speaker 2: Also I'm like waiting for the school to call me

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Speaker 2: and be like, Marley needs to be picked up. She's

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Speaker 2: in sick bay.

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Speaker 1: Oh no, well, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: She's not a morning person at all. Like she's just

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Speaker 2: she fucking hates getting out of bed. She's grumpy, She's

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Speaker 2: very grumpy. She goes to be grumpy till he's had something,

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Speaker 2: and then she wouldn't really hit a toast this morning,

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Speaker 2: and she was like, I'm really cold and it's fucking

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Speaker 2: hot at the moment in Sydney, it's like thirty degrees.

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Speaker 2: And I was like, what's that you want some damma

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Speaker 2: doll sent her off, and she just had the look

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Speaker 2: in her eyes where she was just a bit something's coming.

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Speaker 1: So I was like, she's a ticking time bomb.

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Speaker 2: I said to her. I was like, Marley, just no,

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Speaker 2: just know this, if you call in a sick bay,

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Speaker 2: I can't come until the end of school because I'm

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Speaker 2: working all day to day. I just wanted to like

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Speaker 2: plant the seed, like hed to persevere is that bad?

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Speaker 2: Is that bad? I think because sometimes she's like a

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Speaker 2: few times I picked up a sick bay and I'm like,

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Speaker 2: you're not sick, oh.

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Speaker 1: So much, dummy, because he knows that Pop was on

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Speaker 1: the list, remember, Oh.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, So I just wanted to make her know that,

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Speaker 2: like sick bay is boring, Like it's a fucking room

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Speaker 2: behind the principal's office. There's a hard bed like a

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Speaker 2: prison cell, a prison cell, which it should be. And

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Speaker 2: I just want her to know that if you're sick,

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Speaker 2: you're in the prison cell.

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Speaker 1: Why do they make it so uncomfortable?

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Speaker 2: Because otherwise the place to be full of kids bro

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Speaker 2: like a day sar. Imagine if there are toys in there, men,

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Speaker 2: that they had books. Every kid would be like, I'm

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Speaker 2: not going to fucking MAT's class and a sick bay.

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Speaker 1: I mean, at that age, it's pretty much having fun. Anyway.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I was like, what do you do today? She's like,

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Speaker 2: and I was like what else? I like that. That

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Speaker 2: was pretty much it.

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Speaker 1: I never I don't even get that much out of Oscar.

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Speaker 1: I don't remember. I'm like, oh, god, you've got a

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Speaker 1: young brain, mate, you're old shit.

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Speaker 2: Hey housekeeping? Oh yes, the house is pretty clean at

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Speaker 2: the moment, but just making sure it's going to be

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Speaker 2: spicking spam by this time we finished this episode was

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Speaker 2: last week? Last week did the old serious episode? Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I think so a week before how we just want

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Speaker 2: to say we've got lots of lovely messages for those

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Speaker 2: of you who didn't listen, how do you? We did

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Speaker 2: one about how to raise boys in the men a

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Speaker 2: bit of a serious app. There as many lolls what

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Speaker 2: we would normally do but don't often do serious aps.

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Speaker 1: If something comes across our desk that needs to be addressed,

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Speaker 1: that's serious, we'll tackle.

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Speaker 2: We will tackle it head on, no pads, no helmet,

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Speaker 2: just straight through that, straight for it and lots of

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Speaker 2: lovely feedback. I do have a message here from one

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Speaker 2: dotor in the group and they just say, Ash, because

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Speaker 2: you Yeah, that's right and I really appreciate it. So

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Speaker 2: to the listeners and they said, Ash, you're doing a

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Speaker 2: great job. I want to share something that I said

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Speaker 2: to my husband when we're struggling as parents, because it's

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Speaker 2: really stuck with us. If parenting is hard, it's only

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Speaker 2: because you're trying to.

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Speaker 1: Do it right. Yeah, true, you actually care?

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Speaker 3: You care.

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Speaker 1: I'm not that there's parents out there that don't care.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to say that, but you know what

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Speaker 1: I mean, you care about I was one that was

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Speaker 1: kind of like, ah, you know, I'm just sort of

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Speaker 1: kicking about with it. And then I think, as they're

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Speaker 1: getting older and I'm getting older, much older, I start

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Speaker 1: to think about it. It's forty at the moment, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: thank you, Ah, shut up. I start to think about

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Speaker 1: like how I've just spoken to them and what can

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Speaker 1: I do better now? Which is not like me. But

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Speaker 1: if you.

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Speaker 2: Didn't care, god, parenting would be the breeze, wouldn't it.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I'd be like, what else we've got here? Oh?

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Speaker 1: Your bloody Yes, the apple has gone off. Everyone's geting,

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Speaker 1: their husband's doing Abril and I had a little chuckle

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Speaker 1: in the car, yes, say, because she obviously is in

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Speaker 1: the Facebook group and she's like, oh, everyone's everyone's talking

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Speaker 1: about it.

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Speaker 2: It's such a It's like the benchmark of are you

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Speaker 2: a man or not? Yeah? Have you ever spent any

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Speaker 2: time working with your hands?

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Speaker 4: Me?

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Speaker 2: I can write an email? You are good at that,

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Speaker 2: and I haven't. I haven't yet attempted the apple trick.

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Speaker 2: And again, for reference, Ash split an apple with his

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Speaker 2: bare hands clean in half.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, and we will.

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Speaker 2: We will attempt this after the podcast.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I've got an array of fruit other than the apple.

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Speaker 1: What else you got pears? I've got green apples thought

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Speaker 1: maybe they're stronger. I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Have you tried a green apple?

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Speaker 3: No?

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Speaker 1: I haven't yet. I've got papaya two whole papye is

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Speaker 1: nana dragon fruit.

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Speaker 2: That's fucking messy. You're gonna have to do this outside orange.

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Speaker 1: If you can rip an orange clean in half, we're

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Speaker 1: talking skin membrane, then fruit.

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Speaker 2: We're gonna have to do this video with those shirts on.

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Speaker 1: Well, we've always said I'm listening, Oh Matt, speaking of yes,

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Speaker 1: speaking of arousal, I want to give you and it's

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Speaker 1: a sincere congratulations before a pep in your step. Ah,

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Speaker 1: Laura did on her podcast.

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Speaker 2: I didn't share that because I thought it was too personal.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I was like, I was like, did the school drop off?

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Speaker 2: And what are the parents? Was like, how you doing?

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Speaker 2: And I was like yeah, pretty good.

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Speaker 1: They're like, really you gotta come on your pants.

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Speaker 2: And I was like that was weird and I'm like, yeah.

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Speaker 1: Oh you didn't know that, And I just trust.

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Speaker 2: I trust Laura's radar of what she's going to share

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Speaker 2: and what what is sacred to the.

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Speaker 1: People want to know? They yeah, pick, why do just

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Speaker 1: give me the gist of it? Because as for those

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Speaker 1: who don't know, you have a six week old baby

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Speaker 1: eight weeks old currently eight weeks I believe somewhere and

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Speaker 1: every couple that has kids, it's like, when do you

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Speaker 1: get back on the horse.

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Speaker 2: We're talking about sex?

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Speaker 1: Oh, yes we are. We're talking about yeah, the horse

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Speaker 1: of sex, the naked pants dance.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yes. Laura had the meeting with the obstetrician. He had

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Speaker 2: to look around downstairs, shout out to Bobby and I

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Speaker 2: called Bobby and I said, it's good to go. Sorry,

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Speaker 2: sorry sorry. I was like, look, Laura, whenever you're ready,

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Speaker 2: you let me know.

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Speaker 1: Very that is the correct way.

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Speaker 2: And I was I was nervous, Yeah, you would be,

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Speaker 2: Now were you nervous?

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Speaker 1: Well, both of ours were c sections, so it was

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Speaker 1: kind of like she had to, of course recover from that,

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Speaker 1: which is another thing altogether.

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Speaker 2: So how do you remember just ballpark? How long was it? Roughly?

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Speaker 2: But how long do you can drive a car?

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Speaker 1: She can't drive a car for six weeks.

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Speaker 2: I think she can't just still can't drive.

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Speaker 1: Sorry, Oh my god, good stuff. She couldn't drive till

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Speaker 1: I think six weeks. It's like it's essentially major surgery

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Speaker 1: because of the amount of layers of the abdomen they

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Speaker 1: need to go through.

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Speaker 2: And then eighty four layers. I think it could be.

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Speaker 1: You are a medical doctor, so I can't really remember.

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Speaker 1: Would have been a few months. It definitely would have

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Speaker 1: been a few months, because April would have been like

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Speaker 1: recovery from that. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: You know. Also, what I think is a little bit

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Speaker 2: difficult for me to digest when you're trying to get

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Speaker 2: back into the world of romance with your partner after

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Speaker 2: birth is you got the baby in the room. The

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Speaker 2: baby's like, hey, that's up in the cupboard. Yeah, you know,

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Speaker 2: you're trying to get freaky. And then the baby's like.

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Speaker 1: They're so noisy, so noisy, and they said that like

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Speaker 1: ticks and stuff.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, And I'm like, can you shut up for

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Speaker 2: just two seconds.

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Speaker 1: I even think we didn't get back on the horse

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Speaker 1: until the baby was out of the room. Yeah, I'm

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Speaker 1: not varied. Both kids were different.

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Speaker 2: With Laura was like, let's do it, and I was like, oh, tonight,

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Speaker 2: your eyes, Are you sure, like we really want to

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Speaker 2: do this? Is this? And then it was like I

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Speaker 2: always find it hard. Pardon the punt. I just think

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Speaker 2: in that find it hard when it's like premeditated sex.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, when it's like you like.

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Speaker 2: The spontaneous, I like it to just be like I

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Speaker 2: don't like birthday parties, okay, and I'm going to give

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Speaker 2: you a little Okay, birthday parties, it's premeditated fun. I

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Speaker 2: want it to be like money and it's a lot

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Speaker 2: of money.

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Speaker 1: And there's a clean up afterwards. I'm putting them together already. Okay.

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Speaker 2: But you know when it's you know, I would love

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Speaker 2: There's nothing I enjoy more than it's say I bump

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Speaker 2: into you.

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Speaker 1: And we have sex.

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Speaker 2: But if we bump into each other, we have lunch,

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Speaker 2: We then have a couple of drinks, we have a

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Speaker 2: great night.

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Speaker 1: And then.

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Speaker 2: But when it's like we will have fun on the

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Speaker 2: sixth of January at precisely six pm, you will be

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Speaker 2: there and you're like, you just know some people don't

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Speaker 2: want to be there. It's the pressure, is there?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, And it's like you don't know how you're gonna

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Speaker 1: feel in two weeks time.

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Speaker 2: Yes, I could be dead exactly.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to miss that appointment.

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Speaker 2: And the morning of Laura was like as she was,

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Speaker 2: you know, having breakfast and I was heating out the door,

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Speaker 2: She's like, heye, tonight's the night. And I was like,

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Speaker 2: oh god, why.

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Speaker 3: Do they do that?

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Speaker 1: Because then you're just walking around all day.

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Speaker 2: I couldn't think. I couldn't do anything.

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Speaker 1: I know, I couldn't.

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Speaker 2: I had to have an empty stomach, and it was like,

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Speaker 2: I don't want to.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you're grouchy all you.

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Speaker 2: Ended up eating it, but I was like, all right,

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Speaker 2: like this is it hopped into bed and I.

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Speaker 1: Was like nervous heart right, sugar was like and I.

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Speaker 2: Was like, so.

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Speaker 3: It was.

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Speaker 2: But we knew as awkward as it was, we both

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Speaker 2: we we have to we have to find out, I

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Speaker 2: how to rekindle, get back into the rhythm of the activities.

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Speaker 1: Because otherwise you could fall into and it does happen,

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Speaker 1: and it's normal. Don't don't get me wrong. It's normal

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Speaker 1: because obviously life gets in the way. It's it's people

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Speaker 1: fall into the roommate.

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Speaker 2: It's for one of a better word, it's like the

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Speaker 2: non critical element the to do list.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you know, I think, I think, and it's

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Speaker 1: always and can I just.

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Speaker 2: Say, I don't know how other people have sex. We

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Speaker 2: are nighttime sex people most of the time. For you,

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Speaker 2: most of the time. We have on occasions back in

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Speaker 2: the day, had daytime sex, which I love that.

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Speaker 1: I call it business time business time sex because it's

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Speaker 1: during business hours. It's nine to five Monday to Friday.

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Speaker 1: The best that was a really good thing about COVID.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, sorry to throw it on the bus. They're actual,

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Speaker 1: there's a bit of business time. I just got in

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Speaker 1: a calendar. It's just got like midday meeting.

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Speaker 2: She's like, who's put this here? And you're like tapping

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Speaker 2: on the shoulder.

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Speaker 1: Remember I did that. I put it in the calendar

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Speaker 1: because my wife is an EA and she's everything is about.

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Speaker 1: Everything is about except for except for sex. It's kind

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Speaker 1: of like it's more like every day. I'm like, maybe

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Speaker 1: today's the day. I did that in the calendar, and

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Speaker 1: it was I got to go on so calendars and apples.

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Speaker 2: A simple woman. But we Yeah, I think when it's

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Speaker 2: the when it's the very last thing that you have

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Speaker 2: to do in the day, sometimes it's easy to go

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Speaker 2: I'll do it tomorrow. Yeah, and then you're the next day,

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Speaker 2: and then it's been a week, and then it's been

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Speaker 2: a month, or.

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Speaker 1: One of the kids is sick. There's so many very variables.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so they're variables ash endless, great word, too

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Speaker 2: many variables.

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Speaker 1: All the stars have to align, it has to, you know.

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Speaker 2: And also it's best when it happens when it's no

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Speaker 2: colder than eighteen degrees, no warmer than twenty four degrees.

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Speaker 2: And also I'm worried that I'm going to hurt my

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Speaker 2: wife because it's like, fuck, you know, you've just you've

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Speaker 2: been through yeah, child births a lot, like are you

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Speaker 2: sure you want something back in there?

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Speaker 5: Every dural still kissing and every dural this morning and

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Speaker 5: it's this is in the room, and I'm like, Dr Tim,

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Speaker 5: and did I just pay.

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Speaker 2: For But hey, we did it, We did it. We

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Speaker 2: both enjoyed it.

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Speaker 1: I think, yeah, I think I think it's going to

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Speaker 1: be hard to enjoy the first time after anyway, because

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Speaker 1: like you said, there's a lot of physiological things in

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Speaker 1: play here.

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Speaker 2: So good for you guys, thank you, and look, and

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Speaker 2: it's just nice as well to have such an intimate

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Speaker 2: moment be shared amongst so many all the words of

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Speaker 2: support that people are sent in. You know, it's it's

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Speaker 2: really lovely.

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Speaker 1: My question was what position and what did I think?

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Speaker 1: Belly to belly.

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Speaker 2: Damn, Maddie Acton. Is there anything else?

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Speaker 1: I said, I overheard some gen z talking about different positions,

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Speaker 1: but I have no proof. Oh well there are other positions, Matthew.

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Speaker 1: I guarantee you that breaking news. Yes, we have some

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Speaker 1: breaking news.

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Speaker 2: When people ask me, what's your news source? Is it

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Speaker 2: like the Guardian?

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Speaker 3: Is it?

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Speaker 2: News dot Com is at Delhi Mail? And I say

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Speaker 2: it's Ashwicks.

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Speaker 1: And I get it from Instagram. So you know it's

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Speaker 1: coming from credible sources.

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Speaker 2: If there's anything that's worth knowing, you're going to tell me.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm gonna see right now. Here's the headline. Mom

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Speaker 1: of three boys tries for a girl. Oh that's beautiful.

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Speaker 2: Yeah nice.

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Speaker 1: Instead she gets pregnant with three triplet boys.

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Speaker 2: Ah, what has she done to deserve that? I don't

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Speaker 2: have bad calm in a past life. You're being punished.

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Speaker 1: You have a basketball team now, like literally, it's here

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Speaker 1: we go.

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Speaker 2: So Hannah Hannah.

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Speaker 1: When Hannah A learned she was pregnant, she and her

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Speaker 1: partner Jacob were both excited and a little nervous as

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Speaker 1: you would as you would be. Yeah, already parents are

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Speaker 1: three boys, age eleven, four and one. Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: Hannah had convinced her fiance to have one more child,

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Speaker 1: hopeful it might be a girl. But as that as

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Speaker 1: the anticipation of the gender loomed, this article's great At

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Speaker 1: the first ultrasound eight weeks, everything turned upside down and

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Speaker 1: she was pregnant with three more boys. Jesus, my god,

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Speaker 1: the testosterone in that house.

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Speaker 2: Your life's over.

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Speaker 1: It is like one of world's biggest gambles. I would say, like,

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Speaker 1: if you're going into it going, are we going to

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Speaker 1: go one more? Because we really want to.

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Speaker 2: Go and gray everyone each to their own just say

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Speaker 2: like we're just going one more.

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Speaker 1: Just like just get a female dog. Yeah, you know

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Speaker 1: what you're getting it like.

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Speaker 2: But ultrasound for Poppy, I remember being like very quickly

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Speaker 2: being like how many heart beats are the obviously just

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Speaker 2: wanted to make sure the heartbeat was like good and

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Speaker 2: happy and healthy. But then when she said there was

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Speaker 2: only one, I was like.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I know, I know, I just I can't imagine, like,

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Speaker 1: you know, hearing all these stories of like you like,

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Speaker 1: like the vasectomy story, and then they're like, we accidentally

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Speaker 1: felt pregnancy pregnant and we had triples.

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Speaker 2: And we had octuplets. And you're like, everyone's got a

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Speaker 2: story of like someone in the area who like they

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Speaker 2: tried one last time and fourteen children.

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Speaker 1: It's kind of like that. Everyone. Yeah, everyone has that story. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: what about I've read an article the other day on Instagram.

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Speaker 1: This one was on TikTok so it's incredible and it

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Speaker 1: was woman pregnant with twins but both had different fathers.

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Speaker 1: How does that work?

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Speaker 2: Are you trying to put in two stories into the

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Speaker 2: one episode.

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Speaker 1: I just thought about that and I was like, I

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Speaker 1: think the double penetration is really think that one.

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Speaker 2: We actually did have someone say that our last story

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Speaker 2: about the guy who got the mum and the daughter pregnant,

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Speaker 2: they said that was fake. Well, that's that's not on us. Sorry,

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Speaker 2: I'm not attacking you.

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Speaker 1: That's not on me.

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Speaker 2: I don't want you. I don't know if you've been

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Speaker 2: copping fake news, but just you know.

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Speaker 1: Just just be where people are.

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Speaker 2: Questioning your sources.

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Speaker 1: Question away, question away, ay ash.

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Speaker 2: Yes, I recently was involved at an awards show. Oh yes,

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Speaker 2: the TikTok Awards speak event. For those of you who

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Speaker 2: are not familiar. TikTok as a social media platform.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, where I get my news from from and.

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Speaker 2: They do it every year the last five years. And

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Speaker 2: I got a call. I got a call and it

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Speaker 2: was asking me if I wanted to be involved in

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Speaker 2: the TikTok Awards. And I was like, do you know what.

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Speaker 2: I wasn't going to attend this year. We've been to

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Speaker 2: a couple Yeah, you know, we're a bit old now, yeah,

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Speaker 2: a lot of people with like five thousand peoples, A

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Speaker 2: lot of people.

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Speaker 1: There in the room, honestly, and also we are we're

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Speaker 1: you know, other than kids look after bro. Yeah, but

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Speaker 1: I don't want to Yeah exactly right. I've got kids

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Speaker 1: at home. I don't want to go to an award

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Speaker 1: show and look after the kids at the war award

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Speaker 1: show exactly.

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Speaker 2: But I got the call and I was like, I'll

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Speaker 2: be honest. I was quite flattered to get the call,

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Speaker 2: the invitation to be involved in the event. And at

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Speaker 2: first I was like, am I nominated? Answer was no,

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Speaker 2: no nomination? And I said, well, am I presenting an award?

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Speaker 2: And they said no, And I was like, Okay, well, like,

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Speaker 2: what am I doing? What do you want to do that?

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Speaker 2: Can you clean up after the show? And they said

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Speaker 2: we need someone, We need someone before the show starts.

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Speaker 2: We need someone to be there on stage to do

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Speaker 2: a bit of housekeeping.

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Speaker 1: But more important, you are good at that.

404
00:18:17,800 --> 00:18:19,280
Speaker 2: I was like, will you come to the right planet.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, the house has been k.

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Speaker 2: And then they said, we just need someone because there's

407
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Speaker 2: not really allocated seats. Some seats are reserved, but like

408
00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:31,199
Speaker 2: majority of seats just you come in first in best dressed,

409
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Speaker 2: pick your seat, and as people do, they sit at

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Speaker 2: the very back or the very front. The middle is

411
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Speaker 2: always a bit sparse. People sit on the outer seats,

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Speaker 2: not the middle seats. They say, we need someone to

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Speaker 2: be on stage to just direct people if you spot

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Speaker 2: little gaps, get people to move either in or down

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Speaker 2: from the back.

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Speaker 1: How did that go?

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Speaker 2: And I was like I thought to myself, like that'd

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Speaker 2: be fun, that'd be great. I'd love to do it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm your guy. Everyone's going to be respectful. They're adults.

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Speaker 2: And I look back and I think, gosh, I was

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Speaker 2: so naive and dumb.

422
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Speaker 1: What happened?

423
00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:08,200
Speaker 2: Well, turns out people don't like moving seats.

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Speaker 1: People don't like to be told to do.

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00:19:09,840 --> 00:19:14,040
Speaker 2: People do not. And also when people are sitting down,

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Speaker 2: you sit down in your seat and your chat for

427
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Speaker 2: a bit and you get comfy.

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Speaker 1: You're in you're getting a butt group.

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Speaker 2: And they were like, look, run through some housekeeping. There's like,

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Speaker 2: you know, the bar, toilets, the seating, It'll be like

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Speaker 2: five minutes. And I was like, cool, not a problem anyway.

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Speaker 2: So I'm trying to get people to move seats. No

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Speaker 2: one moves a single seat. I don't think I got

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Speaker 2: one single person to move their seat. And I was

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Speaker 2: like oh, and so then I'm kind of going through

436
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Speaker 2: the housekeeping and then I kind of look off and

437
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:43,240
Speaker 2: they're like there's a big timer and they're like we

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Speaker 2: need five more minutes.

439
00:19:44,359 --> 00:19:44,959
Speaker 1: Oh god.

440
00:19:45,080 --> 00:19:47,800
Speaker 2: And I'm there on stage being like, can you all

441
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:52,000
Speaker 2: plase move seats? No one's fucking moving. And then I

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00:19:52,119 --> 00:19:54,640
Speaker 2: got five more minutes to fill in front of five

443
00:19:54,720 --> 00:19:57,880
Speaker 2: thousand people, and I'm like, i gotta talk about toilets now,

444
00:19:58,119 --> 00:19:59,959
Speaker 2: and I'm like, if you're wondering, we have toilets here

445
00:20:00,280 --> 00:20:04,320
Speaker 2: at the venue. And I just like my brain just

446
00:20:04,359 --> 00:20:05,720
Speaker 2: said I've got a line for here.

447
00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:09,920
Speaker 1: Oh god. Never trust your brain. I've always said that.

448
00:20:11,040 --> 00:20:14,480
Speaker 2: Before I tell you what I said. This morning, I

449
00:20:14,520 --> 00:20:18,800
Speaker 2: saw a video on TikTok and gave me an indication

450
00:20:18,880 --> 00:20:20,200
Speaker 2: of how well it was received.

451
00:20:20,359 --> 00:20:22,200
Speaker 1: Okay, TikTok awards.

452
00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:26,000
Speaker 6: A couple of impressions might get me in trouble. Last night,

453
00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:29,480
Speaker 6: I reattended my utene formal. I feel like it was

454
00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:34,840
Speaker 6: quite a tacky event. The host started with, who's done

455
00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:37,800
Speaker 6: a shit tonight? Let's give a round of applause for

456
00:20:37,840 --> 00:20:38,480
Speaker 6: the toilets.

457
00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:43,120
Speaker 3: Oh you never?

458
00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:46,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, look that's good gear. Right did you say?

459
00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:46,800
Speaker 3: Ok?

460
00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:49,320
Speaker 1: How did it go? Tell me just keep just line

461
00:20:49,359 --> 00:20:49,720
Speaker 1: for line.

462
00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:54,080
Speaker 2: Okay, I said, if you're wondering, yes, there are toilets

463
00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:56,160
Speaker 2: here at the venue. Round of applause for the toilets,

464
00:20:57,359 --> 00:21:01,440
Speaker 2: and I said, has anyone done a ship tonight? Make

465
00:21:01,520 --> 00:21:02,080
Speaker 2: some noise?

466
00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:05,600
Speaker 1: Anyone make any noise? A couple of people, did you

467
00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:07,000
Speaker 1: shame them?

468
00:21:07,320 --> 00:21:09,080
Speaker 2: And I was like, do you think you'll do a second?

469
00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:12,880
Speaker 2: Didn't get that many last but I was like, it's

470
00:21:12,960 --> 00:21:14,520
Speaker 2: going to push through a kick going.

471
00:21:14,359 --> 00:21:17,000
Speaker 1: Five minutes of toilet humor? Oh my goodness.

472
00:21:17,080 --> 00:21:19,000
Speaker 2: And you know what I was going to ask Laura.

473
00:21:19,080 --> 00:21:21,080
Speaker 2: She's my sounding board for whether or not I should

474
00:21:21,080 --> 00:21:23,359
Speaker 2: say something or not. And I didn't ask because I'm like,

475
00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:25,000
Speaker 2: I know what she's going to say because I don't

476
00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:28,359
Speaker 2: say that. And I was like, it'll get a giggle,

477
00:21:28,680 --> 00:21:30,800
Speaker 2: it'll get a laugh. Is it bad?

478
00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:33,400
Speaker 1: One laugh? I thought you were going to say, then

479
00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:35,560
Speaker 1: I want a brand of course with a toilet for

480
00:21:35,560 --> 00:21:36,320
Speaker 1: all the shit they take.

481
00:21:36,920 --> 00:21:37,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, that would have been.

482
00:21:37,880 --> 00:21:42,960
Speaker 1: Yes, that's what I were you me Vegas. Look, I

483
00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:46,720
Speaker 1: don't think that's that bad. And honestly, I'm surprised with

484
00:21:46,760 --> 00:21:50,239
Speaker 1: the amount of adolescents that were in that building that

485
00:21:50,320 --> 00:21:53,159
Speaker 1: no one really cacked up about that, Like you're a

486
00:21:53,160 --> 00:21:54,760
Speaker 1: substitute teacher's talking about shit.

487
00:21:54,840 --> 00:21:57,760
Speaker 2: Will I be invited back on stage? Probably not.

488
00:21:57,840 --> 00:21:59,600
Speaker 1: I think you'll get an even better gig off the

489
00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:02,280
Speaker 1: back of that. Probably, Like you know what, because you

490
00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:04,800
Speaker 1: didn't have much time to turn this around. No, No,

491
00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:07,040
Speaker 1: I feel like I feel.

492
00:22:06,800 --> 00:22:08,880
Speaker 2: Like I was in the moment. I was like, it's

493
00:22:08,920 --> 00:22:11,760
Speaker 2: just me and you brain hit me with your best gear.

494
00:22:12,119 --> 00:22:16,960
Speaker 1: Should have got me on the phone ashes here.

495
00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:21,960
Speaker 2: Look, speaking of Vegas, Vegas, I want to hear about Vegas.

496
00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:24,040
Speaker 1: Well, let's start off.

497
00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:28,080
Speaker 2: By just saying, must be nice in Vegas.

498
00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:31,440
Speaker 1: It was very nice. It was lovely. I had decided

499
00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:34,760
Speaker 1: to treat myself to a trip to Vegas to watch

500
00:22:34,840 --> 00:22:35,680
Speaker 1: the F one.

501
00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:39,199
Speaker 2: Was it like an anniversary gift for you? In April?

502
00:22:39,280 --> 00:22:39,560
Speaker 2: It was?

503
00:22:39,680 --> 00:22:41,720
Speaker 1: It was a joint birthday. We didn't really do anything

504
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:44,119
Speaker 1: for our birthdays this year, like for each other. Hers

505
00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:47,080
Speaker 1: was this month in November, and I thought, there's a

506
00:22:47,160 --> 00:22:48,280
Speaker 1: race in Vegas, and.

507
00:22:48,720 --> 00:22:53,240
Speaker 2: May I just clarify one thing. So for April, you

508
00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:56,000
Speaker 2: went to Vegas, you went to a football game, an

509
00:22:56,119 --> 00:22:58,560
Speaker 2: NFL game in Vegas, you went to the Formula one

510
00:22:58,600 --> 00:22:59,120
Speaker 2: in Vegas.

511
00:23:00,440 --> 00:23:07,960
Speaker 1: For April, we saw Tom Segura for April. April bash okay, okay, No,

512
00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:11,200
Speaker 1: April and I have There's not a lot of things

513
00:23:11,200 --> 00:23:15,639
Speaker 1: that we have shared interest other than sex. You said it,

514
00:23:15,680 --> 00:23:19,480
Speaker 1: not me, but yes, but we you know, we both

515
00:23:19,640 --> 00:23:22,760
Speaker 1: enjoy the drama of F one. We like F one

516
00:23:23,840 --> 00:23:27,159
Speaker 1: the glamour of it too. It's nice to peak peek

517
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:30,720
Speaker 1: in and I love an experience. I can't sit still.

518
00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:33,080
Speaker 1: You know that I need to have something on the radar.

519
00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:35,280
Speaker 1: And that was that was it, and I thought, I'm

520
00:23:35,320 --> 00:23:37,440
Speaker 1: gonna I'm gonna go all out and do it. It's

521
00:23:37,480 --> 00:23:40,240
Speaker 1: a night race. It's in Vegas. It's that you know,

522
00:23:40,320 --> 00:23:43,480
Speaker 1: you get there's there's people playing, like people like Machine

523
00:23:44,400 --> 00:23:49,320
Speaker 1: mg K, who thoughts amazing, really really loved it. Also,

524
00:23:49,359 --> 00:23:53,280
Speaker 1: he was really good t Pain, so he's really wound

525
00:23:53,280 --> 00:23:56,560
Speaker 1: the clock back. His dance moves are bang on. His

526
00:23:56,680 --> 00:23:59,960
Speaker 1: show was very good. I wasn't expecting much because you

527
00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:03,000
Speaker 1: know how a lot of bad pain. Yeah, and you.

528
00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:05,159
Speaker 2: Know how like can I just reminded me one second

529
00:24:05,560 --> 00:24:07,880
Speaker 2: to sing his song Shorty go Low Low Low.

530
00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:10,520
Speaker 1: That's eight bang of that one.

531
00:24:12,280 --> 00:24:29,480
Speaker 7: Ah yeah, that's the one.

532
00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:29,200
Speaker 2: The foom go We're so white.

533
00:24:29,400 --> 00:24:34,119
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, watching this is just dancing with the starts.

534
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:38,240
Speaker 1: He was great. He was very good. He's like the

535
00:24:38,320 --> 00:24:41,760
Speaker 1: showmanship on him because he's obviously a bit more mature now.

536
00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:45,040
Speaker 1: And he's the thing is, he's got such a great voice,

537
00:24:45,119 --> 00:24:47,160
Speaker 1: Like he didn't need any of that auto tune back

538
00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:48,200
Speaker 1: in the day, or he might have been back in

539
00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:51,320
Speaker 1: the day, but since then he's really grown into his voice.

540
00:24:51,359 --> 00:24:52,520
Speaker 2: You don't need it, tear Pain.

541
00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:55,399
Speaker 1: It was me. I was just like, you don't need

542
00:24:56,119 --> 00:24:57,520
Speaker 1: you don't need machines.

543
00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:03,080
Speaker 5: We just want you, We just want you to beat

544
00:25:03,119 --> 00:25:05,200
Speaker 5: your authentic cell I want.

545
00:25:06,720 --> 00:25:16,600
Speaker 1: I came getting shirt. Anyway, we did that. We saw

546
00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:19,960
Speaker 1: Toms of gur Or too. He's very funny and he's

547
00:25:19,960 --> 00:25:23,520
Speaker 1: two bears one cave, so him and Bert. But great

548
00:25:23,560 --> 00:25:26,240
Speaker 1: trip with great people. As you did see.

549
00:25:26,520 --> 00:25:30,040
Speaker 2: People have been asking me, is ash about to start

550
00:25:30,040 --> 00:25:32,000
Speaker 2: only fans just because.

551
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:33,440
Speaker 1: I have friends in the adult industry.

552
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:36,560
Speaker 2: My mom was like, is that guy? What is the

553
00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:39,359
Speaker 2: girth master? Here is a big dick hanging out with

554
00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:42,840
Speaker 2: the girth master, with the girth master who is a

555
00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:43,760
Speaker 2: male performer.

556
00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:47,440
Speaker 1: He's a male performer with browsers, as you can tell

557
00:25:47,440 --> 00:25:49,960
Speaker 1: by the T shirt that I'm wearing. I have met

558
00:25:50,040 --> 00:25:52,080
Speaker 1: him before. I stayed with him last time I was

559
00:25:52,080 --> 00:25:54,840
Speaker 1: in l A great guy from North Queensland. Just a

560
00:25:55,040 --> 00:25:57,280
Speaker 1: very humble to the earth. He is really and I

561
00:25:57,359 --> 00:25:59,960
Speaker 1: met his girlfriend who is lovely as well. But one

562
00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:01,320
Speaker 1: of the best weekends of my life, I will just

563
00:26:01,359 --> 00:26:04,840
Speaker 1: say that straight up. And it kicked off really, really well.

564
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:07,640
Speaker 1: So the day before I got cheeky and you know, man'

565
00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:11,760
Speaker 1: a cheeky bugger flying over with quantas. You can bid

566
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:13,520
Speaker 1: for upgrades and you never get it.

567
00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:16,720
Speaker 8: You never do because it's so like business class, ridiculously

568
00:26:16,760 --> 00:26:19,840
Speaker 8: expensive for what it is. It's bloody lovely, but it's

569
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:22,359
Speaker 8: very like I'm not going to spend ten grand to

570
00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:24,920
Speaker 8: go one way, one way, Matthew.

571
00:26:25,520 --> 00:26:27,920
Speaker 1: So there was an option to bid.

572
00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:30,040
Speaker 2: As much as you like. For a split second, you

573
00:26:30,160 --> 00:26:33,760
Speaker 2: like try and convince yourself like, well, I could justify it,

574
00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:35,760
Speaker 2: and then you're like, what am I fucking doing?

575
00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:38,280
Speaker 1: I know, I'm just like I could use the points.

576
00:26:39,040 --> 00:26:42,639
Speaker 1: But I was like, I'll I'll be cheeky and I'll

577
00:26:42,720 --> 00:26:46,480
Speaker 1: bid the minimum amount. At least I tried, you know,

578
00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:49,520
Speaker 1: I put my hat in the ring. Yeah. Anyway, the

579
00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:53,639
Speaker 1: day before I get an email saying, oh, your bid

580
00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:56,720
Speaker 1: was unsuccessful, and I was like, no surprise, no surprise,

581
00:26:56,840 --> 00:26:59,840
Speaker 1: but that was for premium. And then within a second

582
00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:03,400
Speaker 1: I got an email from Business Class saying your off

583
00:27:03,480 --> 00:27:04,520
Speaker 1: has been accepted.

584
00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:09,520
Speaker 2: Like, is there any email that is greater than that? No,

585
00:27:09,640 --> 00:27:12,119
Speaker 2: that is going to be like when you're trying to

586
00:27:12,119 --> 00:27:14,400
Speaker 2: find your keys and you finally find them, Like those

587
00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:15,120
Speaker 2: feelings that.

588
00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:19,480
Speaker 1: It's just especially as a tired parent, as a tired dad. Yes,

589
00:27:19,800 --> 00:27:22,920
Speaker 1: I got to ring April up and I said, I said, hey,

590
00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:25,240
Speaker 1: you're not going to believe this. She's like, what have

591
00:27:25,280 --> 00:27:29,840
Speaker 1: you done? I was like, I've got good news for

592
00:27:29,920 --> 00:27:34,240
Speaker 1: you and me and I stupidly I should have fucked

593
00:27:34,240 --> 00:27:38,280
Speaker 1: with it way more. I could have. Really, you could

594
00:27:38,320 --> 00:27:40,320
Speaker 1: have done the whole there's one seat, What do you

595
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:43,800
Speaker 1: want to do? I could I look, honestly, I think

596
00:27:43,840 --> 00:27:45,480
Speaker 1: I should take I could have done all that.

597
00:27:46,040 --> 00:27:48,639
Speaker 2: Or you could have done the wholesome, like she doesn't

598
00:27:48,680 --> 00:27:51,480
Speaker 2: know it yet, but she's about I could have.

599
00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:54,399
Speaker 1: But I'm but you got excited. I'm excited and that

600
00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:57,760
Speaker 1: fills my cup when I get to tell someone that, hey,

601
00:27:57,800 --> 00:28:00,320
Speaker 1: you're going to experience something, and that's because of me

602
00:28:00,560 --> 00:28:04,359
Speaker 1: and my childish and stupid ways. So we started off great.

603
00:28:04,520 --> 00:28:08,160
Speaker 1: It just made the leaving the kids even easier anyway,

604
00:28:12,040 --> 00:28:16,600
Speaker 1: and we get on the plane. It's beautiful. Everyone's really nice.

605
00:28:16,720 --> 00:28:19,560
Speaker 1: I kind of felt like, do they know that like

606
00:28:19,760 --> 00:28:21,720
Speaker 1: one is on the bead or do they become important

607
00:28:21,720 --> 00:28:22,639
Speaker 1: and have the money for this?

608
00:28:22,760 --> 00:28:25,320
Speaker 2: You've got the like the broken seat. Yeah, yeah, you

609
00:28:25,480 --> 00:28:26,520
Speaker 2: only get half the meals.

610
00:28:27,840 --> 00:28:30,399
Speaker 1: I got to pay for the meals. Still would have

611
00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:33,040
Speaker 1: done it. Anything to lay down that high in the

612
00:28:33,080 --> 00:28:35,639
Speaker 1: air is that, you know? Like it's great? So that

613
00:28:35,760 --> 00:28:39,040
Speaker 1: was good. We get there. Unfortunately, as what happens when

614
00:28:39,040 --> 00:28:41,239
Speaker 1: you fight to America and connecting flights. Because of their

615
00:28:41,240 --> 00:28:44,120
Speaker 1: populations three hundred and forty three million people, it's a lot.

616
00:28:44,200 --> 00:28:47,320
Speaker 1: There's delays in cancelations. So we were delayed, which you know,

617
00:28:47,600 --> 00:28:50,840
Speaker 1: but it gave us, being a business, access to the

618
00:28:50,880 --> 00:28:54,240
Speaker 1: first lounge in America. So we had six hours in

619
00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:57,440
Speaker 1: the first class lounge. In that lounge, people were definitely

620
00:28:57,480 --> 00:29:00,520
Speaker 1: like you belong and I was like, thank God, I

621
00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:03,280
Speaker 1: don't belong here, your pompers wanker. Anyway, we went to

622
00:29:03,320 --> 00:29:06,240
Speaker 1: the F one amazing rained a little bit. It was

623
00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:09,240
Speaker 1: freezing over there, but it was did a helicopter over

624
00:29:09,320 --> 00:29:12,320
Speaker 1: Vegas the whole bit. And the first night we were

625
00:29:12,320 --> 00:29:13,920
Speaker 1: there because it was a night race at the Sphere

626
00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:15,160
Speaker 1: and all this sort of stuff, I was like a

627
00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:17,080
Speaker 1: kid in the candy store, man, like you couldn't wipe

628
00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:18,840
Speaker 1: the smile off my fat. April was like, I don't

629
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:20,800
Speaker 1: think I've ever seen you this happy. I was just

630
00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:23,080
Speaker 1: in my element. It was great. Got invited to the

631
00:29:23,120 --> 00:29:26,440
Speaker 1: Raiders game, which was a nice touch. And then flying home.

632
00:29:26,880 --> 00:29:29,240
Speaker 1: There's an expression I like to use. It's called going

633
00:29:29,240 --> 00:29:30,680
Speaker 1: from the penthouse to the shit house.

634
00:29:30,960 --> 00:29:31,200
Speaker 2: Yep.

635
00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:35,160
Speaker 1: And look, we were like we've had such a great weekend.

636
00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:38,880
Speaker 1: We're tired, We're going to get on this flight. Yeah,

637
00:29:38,920 --> 00:29:42,320
Speaker 1: it's in economy. Whatever, I don't belong here. That's I

638
00:29:42,440 --> 00:29:44,920
Speaker 1: was like, I'm not one of you. I was like,

639
00:29:47,120 --> 00:29:50,000
Speaker 1: I was wiping it down. I didn't just have to

640
00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:53,800
Speaker 1: sit in economy. I have to God, I didn't just

641
00:29:53,840 --> 00:29:56,280
Speaker 1: sit in an economy Like. I was like, look, I

642
00:29:56,360 --> 00:30:00,400
Speaker 1: know that was an experience that I have to member,

643
00:30:00,520 --> 00:30:03,200
Speaker 1: but have to know where I belong. And I do

644
00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:05,360
Speaker 1: belong in the economy. You know, you put the yard

645
00:30:05,360 --> 00:30:09,560
Speaker 1: dogs in the yard. Anyway, I get on the plane

646
00:30:09,600 --> 00:30:12,200
Speaker 1: and I'm like, okay, I'm in the main cabin. Great, beautiful.

647
00:30:12,600 --> 00:30:16,520
Speaker 2: May I ask middle or you like on the side

648
00:30:16,520 --> 00:30:18,080
Speaker 2: of the window where I seated?

649
00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:22,040
Speaker 1: Well, I purchase seats so that we could be in

650
00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:25,719
Speaker 1: the two two seater just with each other, so it's

651
00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:28,600
Speaker 1: like there's no one else, just so that we can

652
00:30:28,640 --> 00:30:31,680
Speaker 1: be a bit more comfortable, right, And that's fine.

653
00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:34,880
Speaker 2: I thought maybe the configuration two three two, what's the.

654
00:30:35,160 --> 00:30:38,520
Speaker 1: It was two four two two two at the back,

655
00:30:38,600 --> 00:30:40,680
Speaker 1: like at the back of the main cabin. Yes, but

656
00:30:40,720 --> 00:30:43,000
Speaker 1: the main cabin, and they went up to forty four,

657
00:30:43,120 --> 00:30:45,440
Speaker 1: So I'm like, okay, so it must be there must

658
00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:47,840
Speaker 1: be another cabin, like you know how the Quantus has

659
00:30:47,840 --> 00:30:50,960
Speaker 1: the two story plane. You're up top, And I was like, okay,

660
00:30:50,960 --> 00:30:53,520
Speaker 1: I can't be that bad. Whatever, It'll be fine, just

661
00:30:53,520 --> 00:30:56,280
Speaker 1: the two of us. Anyway, I get on the plane

662
00:30:56,320 --> 00:31:00,200
Speaker 1: and I keep going back and back and back. I'm

663
00:31:00,240 --> 00:31:02,440
Speaker 1: the second last seat. So I literally went from the

664
00:31:02,480 --> 00:31:05,960
Speaker 1: front of the plane to the very back of the plane.

665
00:31:06,680 --> 00:31:10,600
Speaker 1: My seat wouldn't recline. Oh the cushion had had three

666
00:31:10,640 --> 00:31:15,040
Speaker 1: thousand bums on it. I had literally chafed up from

667
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:18,760
Speaker 1: my butt to the under my kneecap because of the

668
00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:24,120
Speaker 1: seat was so uncomfortable. Fourteen hours of no sleep and

669
00:31:24,880 --> 00:31:29,640
Speaker 1: literally like I could not get comfortable one bit. The

670
00:31:29,680 --> 00:31:32,160
Speaker 1: guy in front of April, his bo was off the

671
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:36,120
Speaker 1: Richter like immediately. And the guy in front of me, who,

672
00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:38,520
Speaker 1: I know, you have made my life more comfortable by

673
00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:42,400
Speaker 1: fighting on aeroplanes on long haul fights domestic long haul,

674
00:31:42,520 --> 00:31:46,640
Speaker 1: fine jinx. The guy in front of me, I don't

675
00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:51,280
Speaker 1: know what he ate, but the thing is he put

676
00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:55,280
Speaker 1: on his bag on his lap and he used that

677
00:31:55,400 --> 00:31:58,240
Speaker 1: the whole time, like, which is smart, very smart, very smart.

678
00:31:58,240 --> 00:32:02,760
Speaker 1: But he was just latinum fly. So for fourteen hours

679
00:32:02,960 --> 00:32:05,280
Speaker 1: from the penthouse to the ship house, and I think

680
00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:06,800
Speaker 1: April and I at one point were like.

681
00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:08,760
Speaker 2: Do you think it's better to have would you? Would

682
00:32:08,800 --> 00:32:10,280
Speaker 2: you go that way? Would you flip it?

683
00:32:10,360 --> 00:32:12,640
Speaker 1: Flip it? You'd flip it. I think the I think

684
00:32:12,640 --> 00:32:17,720
Speaker 1: the excitement of the trip makes the economy worthwhile fine, manageable,

685
00:32:17,720 --> 00:32:21,600
Speaker 1: and it is. Look, honestly, economy is fine these days,

686
00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:23,840
Speaker 1: Like especially on a forty hour flight. All the food's free,

687
00:32:23,840 --> 00:32:25,120
Speaker 1: the drinks are free, everything's free.

688
00:32:25,240 --> 00:32:27,640
Speaker 2: To convince me bro tough.

689
00:32:27,400 --> 00:32:29,600
Speaker 1: Anyway, so I had a couple of gummies just to

690
00:32:29,600 --> 00:32:31,360
Speaker 1: get to sleep. Didn't work, so I was just high

691
00:32:31,440 --> 00:32:35,840
Speaker 1: the whole time. Anyway, we made it back in one

692
00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:39,360
Speaker 1: piece and I look aged, but one of the one

693
00:32:39,400 --> 00:32:42,560
Speaker 1: of the best weekends apart from the chafe on my ass.

694
00:32:42,600 --> 00:32:44,480
Speaker 2: Did you bid on business on the way back?

695
00:32:44,800 --> 00:32:49,560
Speaker 1: I couldn't because I paid for the flights over and

696
00:32:49,600 --> 00:32:53,440
Speaker 1: the points got me home, and I was so close

697
00:32:53,600 --> 00:32:56,560
Speaker 1: and I'm actually lucky I didn't do it. There were

698
00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:59,080
Speaker 1: seats available in premium economy for the flight home with

699
00:32:59,120 --> 00:33:03,520
Speaker 1: American Airlines, and I was like, I'm just going to

700
00:33:03,600 --> 00:33:07,000
Speaker 1: get that. I need I need something because you know, like,

701
00:33:07,040 --> 00:33:09,640
Speaker 1: I've flown premium before and it's it is a little

702
00:33:09,680 --> 00:33:12,719
Speaker 1: bit better, and it was like five grand I was like,

703
00:33:13,720 --> 00:33:15,520
Speaker 1: and then I didn't do it. And I got on

704
00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:17,320
Speaker 1: the plane and saw that it was not going to

705
00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:19,560
Speaker 1: be worth it, So back I went.

706
00:33:19,960 --> 00:33:21,200
Speaker 2: How was it coming home with the kids?

707
00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:23,840
Speaker 1: It was good, man, I really I really missed them.

708
00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:26,280
Speaker 1: Actually I missed them on the way home.

709
00:33:27,160 --> 00:33:29,320
Speaker 2: When you were like dying in the back of the plane.

710
00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:31,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, when the head noise came, I was like, oh god,

711
00:33:31,720 --> 00:33:34,560
Speaker 1: I was my kids. You know. It was a good trip.

712
00:33:34,600 --> 00:33:36,360
Speaker 1: Like we were so action packed, we didn't really have

713
00:33:36,360 --> 00:33:38,840
Speaker 1: a moment to sit and go. I really miss a kid.

714
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:41,800
Speaker 1: But we spoke to them a few times. But like, man,

715
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:44,000
Speaker 1: they loved having like Nan and Pop stay over there.

716
00:33:44,120 --> 00:33:45,960
Speaker 1: And yeah, they had their own fun. You know, they're

717
00:33:45,960 --> 00:33:49,320
Speaker 1: getting bloody chocolates and shit. And I came back and

718
00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:51,720
Speaker 1: Oscar's got like fifty bucks. I was like, what the

719
00:33:51,720 --> 00:33:54,280
Speaker 1: hell you got more money than me from who? Just

720
00:33:54,960 --> 00:33:55,840
Speaker 1: people bribing him?

721
00:33:55,920 --> 00:33:56,120
Speaker 2: Wow.

722
00:33:56,400 --> 00:33:58,760
Speaker 1: Anyway, but it was great trip, and I'm back and

723
00:33:58,800 --> 00:33:59,160
Speaker 1: I'm here.

724
00:33:59,200 --> 00:34:00,200
Speaker 2: It's good to have you back.

725
00:34:00,360 --> 00:34:00,800
Speaker 1: Thank you.

726
00:34:01,240 --> 00:34:05,360
Speaker 2: I was worried sick. You enjoying yourself over there in Vegas.

727
00:34:05,520 --> 00:34:08,239
Speaker 2: Ash in Vegas makes Maddie Jay a nervous person.

728
00:34:08,640 --> 00:34:09,920
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, And look I was.

729
00:34:10,239 --> 00:34:11,560
Speaker 2: I was like, do you know why he's with April.

730
00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:13,640
Speaker 2: He's in safe and the girths and the girth Master

731
00:34:13,840 --> 00:34:16,360
Speaker 2: very safe hands. I should have a moment if I

732
00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:20,200
Speaker 2: may go for it. Big event yesterday, go on. Doesn't

733
00:34:20,200 --> 00:34:24,120
Speaker 2: get any bigger than this. We celebrated the graduation of

734
00:34:24,280 --> 00:34:26,320
Speaker 2: Lola Johnson from daycare.

735
00:34:26,680 --> 00:34:30,959
Speaker 1: Congratulations, it's a it's a big step. And people without

736
00:34:31,040 --> 00:34:31,960
Speaker 1: kids don't understand.

737
00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:33,960
Speaker 2: If you went to me before I had kids and

738
00:34:34,400 --> 00:34:37,439
Speaker 2: you said one of the most emotional experiences of your

739
00:34:37,640 --> 00:34:40,040
Speaker 2: young life as a parent will be when you go

740
00:34:40,160 --> 00:34:43,120
Speaker 2: to a graduation from daycare, I'd say, shouldn't you celebrate

741
00:34:43,120 --> 00:34:45,279
Speaker 2: that you're not paying the fees anymore? Like why is

742
00:34:45,280 --> 00:34:48,480
Speaker 2: that emotional? And like, dude, I was standing there. I

743
00:34:48,520 --> 00:34:51,280
Speaker 2: have my glasses on because I had a couple of tears.

744
00:34:51,880 --> 00:34:58,120
Speaker 1: Oh yeah. Like it's a weird combination of pride, yes, change, yeah,

745
00:34:58,280 --> 00:35:00,479
Speaker 1: comfortability and it's and.

746
00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:05,239
Speaker 2: Not knowing what's next and parenting is this weird contrast

747
00:35:05,400 --> 00:35:08,880
Speaker 2: of you want your kids to grow up and become

748
00:35:08,920 --> 00:35:11,840
Speaker 2: more independent and it gets a little bit easier, and

749
00:35:11,880 --> 00:35:15,239
Speaker 2: then at the same time, the whiplash to that is

750
00:35:15,280 --> 00:35:17,680
Speaker 2: then going, oh my gosh, they've changed so much from

751
00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:20,360
Speaker 2: that little child, that little baby that I was once nurturing.

752
00:35:20,719 --> 00:35:23,239
Speaker 2: Every year they grow a little bit older. They no

753
00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:24,800
Speaker 2: longer need me as much as a parent.

754
00:35:24,880 --> 00:35:28,399
Speaker 1: And also, like you're doing, you're in that moment and

755
00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:30,879
Speaker 1: your iPhone goes, here's a memory from three years ago,

756
00:35:31,360 --> 00:35:34,960
Speaker 1: and you're like, God, I don't know, I'm already feeling

757
00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:37,960
Speaker 1: emotional because of I mean that the change, the growth,

758
00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:40,480
Speaker 1: and then yeah, also like the unknown, and then you

759
00:35:40,560 --> 00:35:44,200
Speaker 1: get the look look at the little baby, like my.

760
00:35:44,200 --> 00:35:46,320
Speaker 2: Little girl who couldn't even put her shoes on in

761
00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:49,560
Speaker 2: the morning, couldn't brush her hair, you know, this morning,

762
00:35:49,760 --> 00:35:51,680
Speaker 2: the morning when she was getting ready for the graduation,

763
00:35:51,800 --> 00:35:53,279
Speaker 2: she was like, I want to do my own hair.

764
00:35:53,719 --> 00:35:55,760
Speaker 2: I'm putting my shoes on and they're on the wrong feet,

765
00:35:58,160 --> 00:36:01,560
Speaker 2: but that's fine, and yeah, it's such a big deal.

766
00:36:01,840 --> 00:36:05,280
Speaker 2: You look around and like, you know, every parent pretty

767
00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:08,440
Speaker 2: much was like wiping a tear as the child stood

768
00:36:08,520 --> 00:36:11,680
Speaker 2: there and like waved to us from the graduation seat,

769
00:36:11,719 --> 00:36:14,799
Speaker 2: and you're like, oh my god, one.

770
00:36:14,719 --> 00:36:17,720
Speaker 1: Of one's going to be like when they move out. Oh,

771
00:36:17,760 --> 00:36:20,360
Speaker 1: And it's like I always joke about like, oh I

772
00:36:20,400 --> 00:36:22,720
Speaker 1: can't wait for to move that, But it's a joke.

773
00:36:22,920 --> 00:36:25,640
Speaker 1: I mean I'm going to be absolutely rattled when Oscar

774
00:36:25,640 --> 00:36:28,600
Speaker 1: and Macy move out of my house. Like watch that

775
00:36:28,680 --> 00:36:30,920
Speaker 1: video of Bert Krysher crying because his kids have all

776
00:36:30,960 --> 00:36:32,960
Speaker 1: flown the nest after college, and I'm like, why's that

777
00:36:33,040 --> 00:36:36,480
Speaker 1: go crying? I understand why he would be so emotional.

778
00:36:36,640 --> 00:36:39,799
Speaker 2: And I thought I thought, experiencing the graduation first time

779
00:36:39,800 --> 00:36:41,880
Speaker 2: with Marley, which was emotional, I thought second time around,

780
00:36:41,880 --> 00:36:44,480
Speaker 2: it might be a little bit easier you're experienced, and

781
00:36:44,719 --> 00:36:47,239
Speaker 2: it's not. It hits even harder now because you're like,

782
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:49,800
Speaker 2: this is the last time that she's ever going to

783
00:36:49,840 --> 00:36:52,879
Speaker 2: step foot in a daycare from this moment on. She's

784
00:36:52,880 --> 00:36:56,600
Speaker 2: in school, and I know that when Poppy graduates, oh

785
00:36:56,719 --> 00:36:58,680
Speaker 2: my gosh.

786
00:36:57,880 --> 00:37:00,399
Speaker 1: I know I got one more year with Macy at

787
00:37:00,400 --> 00:37:04,320
Speaker 1: her daycare and that'll kill me. Yeah, And that'll absolutely

788
00:37:04,400 --> 00:37:05,359
Speaker 1: And also just.

789
00:37:05,560 --> 00:37:08,840
Speaker 2: The look of pride on their face when they stand

790
00:37:08,880 --> 00:37:12,280
Speaker 2: there holding the graduation certificate and you like.

791
00:37:12,880 --> 00:37:15,719
Speaker 1: It's hard. Yeah, it's a weird combination. And if you

792
00:37:15,840 --> 00:37:17,359
Speaker 1: like you said if you don't have kids, you won't

793
00:37:17,440 --> 00:37:21,120
Speaker 1: you don't understand that feeling. It's not a sad, it's

794
00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:23,160
Speaker 1: kind of a bit sad, but it's also a bit

795
00:37:23,280 --> 00:37:24,080
Speaker 1: like pride.

796
00:37:24,160 --> 00:37:27,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a blend of both ends of the spectrum

797
00:37:27,800 --> 00:37:32,239
Speaker 2: of being incredibly proud, but also like God, it's so emotional.

798
00:37:32,360 --> 00:37:33,640
Speaker 1: It's an orgy of emotions.

799
00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:38,640
Speaker 2: Also, big shout outs all the kids out there who

800
00:37:38,640 --> 00:37:40,880
Speaker 2: were either gone through the graduation or about to have

801
00:37:40,920 --> 00:37:44,560
Speaker 2: the graduation from daycare. It's a very emotional time and

802
00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:47,839
Speaker 2: it's also very emotional for the parents, not just because

803
00:37:47,880 --> 00:37:49,680
Speaker 2: they are saying goodbye to daycare and it's a big

804
00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:51,840
Speaker 2: step up into school, but because of the time of

805
00:37:51,880 --> 00:37:52,560
Speaker 2: the graduation.

806
00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:54,040
Speaker 1: Okay, what do you mean.

807
00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:58,000
Speaker 2: So we've previously had a graduation for Marley where it

808
00:37:58,080 --> 00:38:00,080
Speaker 2: was on I think a Thursday or a Friday. It

809
00:38:00,120 --> 00:38:02,080
Speaker 2: was on at five o'clock and it ran for a

810
00:38:02,120 --> 00:38:04,839
Speaker 2: couple hours, I think around like seven seven thirty. Yeah,

811
00:38:04,880 --> 00:38:08,160
Speaker 2: the graduation. You've got a pizza, you know, oh yeah,

812
00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:10,399
Speaker 2: and then and that was fine. It was a bit

813
00:38:10,440 --> 00:38:12,200
Speaker 2: tricky because you don't get you know, the kids are

814
00:38:12,280 --> 00:38:14,720
Speaker 2: hungry and they're tied, so it's you know, it's tricky.

815
00:38:15,200 --> 00:38:18,040
Speaker 2: The graduation we had the other day at our daycare

816
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:20,040
Speaker 2: was at eleven o'clock.

817
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:24,600
Speaker 1: At night, I was gonna say, in Vegas.

818
00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:27,640
Speaker 2: And for us, I mean it was on a Thursday,

819
00:38:27,680 --> 00:38:30,040
Speaker 2: and I've got Lola on a Thursday anyway, So for me,

820
00:38:30,080 --> 00:38:33,239
Speaker 2: it doesn't put me out because yeah, it's great, it's fine,

821
00:38:33,280 --> 00:38:36,440
Speaker 2: it's like it's something to do, whereas one day I

822
00:38:36,560 --> 00:38:39,399
Speaker 2: been on the WhatsApp chat for daycare and then there's

823
00:38:39,400 --> 00:38:42,720
Speaker 2: like one hundred and fifty messages. Parents were kicking.

824
00:38:42,400 --> 00:38:44,839
Speaker 1: Off about the time because and I get it.

825
00:38:44,880 --> 00:38:47,080
Speaker 2: If you if you've paid the money to have your

826
00:38:47,160 --> 00:38:50,560
Speaker 2: kid on a Thursday at daycare, you've then got to

827
00:38:50,640 --> 00:38:53,080
Speaker 2: leave work. You've got to then do the graduation. The

828
00:38:53,080 --> 00:38:54,719
Speaker 2: graduation is going to run for like an hour and

829
00:38:54,800 --> 00:38:55,440
Speaker 2: a half.

830
00:38:55,320 --> 00:38:57,640
Speaker 1: Right in the middle of it because lunch break.

831
00:38:57,719 --> 00:38:59,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, but then you're not going to leave your kid

832
00:38:59,600 --> 00:39:01,960
Speaker 2: at day people are going to do the graduation and

833
00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:05,040
Speaker 2: then take the kid home. Yeah that because you can't.

834
00:39:05,120 --> 00:39:07,160
Speaker 2: You can't be like hey, here I am and then like, well,

835
00:39:07,160 --> 00:39:09,839
Speaker 2: I'll be back in a couple of hours. Parents were

836
00:39:10,360 --> 00:39:14,440
Speaker 2: chicking off, absolutely filthy.

837
00:39:15,040 --> 00:39:17,080
Speaker 1: Why why why did they do that?

838
00:39:17,640 --> 00:39:19,359
Speaker 2: They said, that like they've done it the other way

839
00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:22,359
Speaker 2: in the past. Keep everyone happy, bullshit. They didn't want

840
00:39:22,400 --> 00:39:23,560
Speaker 2: to pay overs. Do you reckon?

841
00:39:23,760 --> 00:39:28,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, after five o'clock overs on a on a preschool

842
00:39:28,440 --> 00:39:31,319
Speaker 1: teacher must be diabolical, right, it'd be double time and

843
00:39:31,320 --> 00:39:32,160
Speaker 1: a half or some ship.

844
00:39:32,360 --> 00:39:35,040
Speaker 2: So they said, well, whether we do it either which way,

845
00:39:35,080 --> 00:39:37,000
Speaker 2: we get the same complaints. We can't keep everyone happy.

846
00:39:37,560 --> 00:39:42,040
Speaker 1: Just do it, just live stream it.

847
00:39:42,040 --> 00:39:44,279
Speaker 2: It was nice to do. The teacher she you know,

848
00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:47,000
Speaker 2: when she said goodbye to the kids, she got emotional,

849
00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:49,280
Speaker 2: and it's nice to know the level of an investment.

850
00:39:49,320 --> 00:39:53,839
Speaker 2: When the daycare teacher she was acting, she went, I

851
00:39:53,880 --> 00:39:56,640
Speaker 2: was like, didn't actually see she she did the old like.

852
00:39:56,760 --> 00:39:59,400
Speaker 1: Oh, that's nice.

853
00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:00,000
Speaker 2: She was nice.

854
00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:01,560
Speaker 1: There are some really nice.

855
00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:05,960
Speaker 2: But then they also have like each kid has their

856
00:40:06,000 --> 00:40:08,600
Speaker 2: little like a little scroll of something. I don't I

857
00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:10,359
Speaker 2: don't know what was written on it, but they're like,

858
00:40:11,040 --> 00:40:12,200
Speaker 2: let's have Timmy come up.

859
00:40:12,280 --> 00:40:13,120
Speaker 1: It is Harvard.

860
00:40:13,880 --> 00:40:16,400
Speaker 2: My god, I just I liked it. But then the

861
00:40:16,440 --> 00:40:18,960
Speaker 2: teacher would read out a couple of words about Timmy

862
00:40:19,640 --> 00:40:22,920
Speaker 2: and like some kids had these beautiful like and this

863
00:40:23,040 --> 00:40:26,319
Speaker 2: is Sarah. Sarah is one of the warmest children who

864
00:40:26,400 --> 00:40:30,640
Speaker 2: was friends to all smile on your face and we're

865
00:40:30,680 --> 00:40:33,280
Speaker 2: going to miss her fun games and a hula hooping

866
00:40:33,280 --> 00:40:36,880
Speaker 2: in the backyard. And then some You're like, obviously like

867
00:40:36,880 --> 00:40:39,759
Speaker 2: a naughty kid. They're like, and this is Sean who

868
00:40:39,800 --> 00:40:40,839
Speaker 2: we will miss.

869
00:40:41,280 --> 00:40:46,000
Speaker 1: Seen off at them all, this is j Jack, Jacob,

870
00:40:46,160 --> 00:40:47,880
Speaker 1: James and Jim.

871
00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:52,040
Speaker 2: And I was like, oh, you want to like keep

872
00:40:52,080 --> 00:40:52,520
Speaker 2: it even.

873
00:40:53,200 --> 00:40:56,719
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think like it's like for them to have

874
00:40:56,760 --> 00:40:58,759
Speaker 1: to give a little spiel on every kid is a

875
00:40:58,760 --> 00:41:01,960
Speaker 1: bit march and like what about okay, what about Marley?

876
00:41:02,080 --> 00:41:04,000
Speaker 1: Like coming to the end of the first year of school,

877
00:41:04,000 --> 00:41:05,440
Speaker 1: do they have like an end.

878
00:41:05,440 --> 00:41:09,319
Speaker 2: Of year They've got the Big Assembly, yes, and Big

879
00:41:09,360 --> 00:41:11,560
Speaker 2: Assembly next week. I don't know what happens. I'm sure

880
00:41:11,560 --> 00:41:14,320
Speaker 2: I'm going to fucking sit through like recorder performances and

881
00:41:14,640 --> 00:41:16,320
Speaker 2: dance performances in the school choir.

882
00:41:16,600 --> 00:41:19,800
Speaker 1: What days sho was? Next week? U same?

883
00:41:20,280 --> 00:41:21,640
Speaker 2: Are you cheer Tuesday?

884
00:41:21,680 --> 00:41:26,040
Speaker 1: And Oscar's getting an award? I don't know what for, Like, man,

885
00:41:26,080 --> 00:41:27,959
Speaker 1: let's get my wife on the phone floor out because

886
00:41:27,960 --> 00:41:31,840
Speaker 1: she would know. I unsubscribed to the emails and deleted

887
00:41:31,840 --> 00:41:36,400
Speaker 1: the WhatsApp group because I don't have time for that. Hey, here,

888
00:41:36,440 --> 00:41:41,200
Speaker 1: you going, Hey, April, how are you? Oh hey, hey,

889
00:41:41,400 --> 00:41:42,319
Speaker 1: quick question for you.

890
00:41:42,440 --> 00:41:44,280
Speaker 2: Oh. Firstly, your trip look great, by the way.

891
00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:46,080
Speaker 4: It was.

892
00:41:46,120 --> 00:41:48,600
Speaker 1: It was so fun. So for the flight home with

893
00:41:48,680 --> 00:41:52,560
Speaker 1: old Fardy McGee and bo boys in front of it. Yeah,

894
00:41:52,560 --> 00:41:55,399
Speaker 1: I've already forgotten about the bad stuff. Good, that's good.

895
00:41:55,440 --> 00:41:59,000
Speaker 1: That's what I want to hear. Hey, Oscar's getting an award?

896
00:42:00,320 --> 00:42:00,560
Speaker 3: Yeah?

897
00:42:01,440 --> 00:42:04,799
Speaker 1: What is that award for? Vala Victorian?

898
00:42:04,880 --> 00:42:05,680
Speaker 3: Whatever it's called?

899
00:42:06,920 --> 00:42:12,600
Speaker 1: Just what so ducks? I'm joking. Sorry, that was my

900
00:42:12,719 --> 00:42:18,319
Speaker 1: dream last night. Oh yeah, yeah Victorian. Some weird dreams girl. Uh,

901
00:42:18,480 --> 00:42:20,839
Speaker 1: now do you know what it's for or no?

902
00:42:21,040 --> 00:42:21,399
Speaker 3: Just stop?

903
00:42:21,480 --> 00:42:22,600
Speaker 2: Told he's getting an award.

904
00:42:22,719 --> 00:42:25,560
Speaker 7: I think it's just because he is the smartest kid

905
00:42:25,600 --> 00:42:26,360
Speaker 7: in the class.

906
00:42:26,680 --> 00:42:28,280
Speaker 1: There you go, that's amazing.

907
00:42:28,360 --> 00:42:29,400
Speaker 2: Congratulations.

908
00:42:29,480 --> 00:42:31,320
Speaker 1: He's probably just like attended every.

909
00:42:31,200 --> 00:42:37,279
Speaker 2: Day he gets the attendance award. I'm that mum that

910
00:42:37,400 --> 00:42:39,160
Speaker 2: just thinks her child's the bee's knees.

911
00:42:39,280 --> 00:42:41,360
Speaker 1: So fair enough, you got it.

912
00:42:41,840 --> 00:42:43,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, and he is a great kid.

913
00:42:43,880 --> 00:42:45,399
Speaker 1: I don't want to meet the parents like my kid.

914
00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:50,959
Speaker 1: He sucks. You don't want to meet that parent? All right? Well,

915
00:42:51,200 --> 00:42:53,279
Speaker 1: thank you. I thought you had more answers than that,

916
00:42:53,320 --> 00:42:55,759
Speaker 1: but clearly not no, I don't. I don't think we're

917
00:42:55,800 --> 00:42:57,359
Speaker 1: meant to know. I think it's a surprise for us.

918
00:42:58,040 --> 00:43:03,239
Speaker 1: Oh okay, well next week, Yeah, big day, big day

919
00:43:03,239 --> 00:43:04,040
Speaker 1: for all of us.

920
00:43:04,400 --> 00:43:05,440
Speaker 2: Yeah. Put in the calendar.

921
00:43:05,920 --> 00:43:11,560
Speaker 1: How did I'll put it right after sexual intercourse in

922
00:43:11,600 --> 00:43:12,080
Speaker 1: the calendar?

923
00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:13,680
Speaker 4: Great?

924
00:43:15,480 --> 00:43:18,359
Speaker 1: How did makeson go? Ballet? She did really well?

925
00:43:18,440 --> 00:43:19,520
Speaker 3: Concert is next week?

926
00:43:20,080 --> 00:43:23,400
Speaker 2: Already to ballet classes and we're ready for a concert.

927
00:43:23,640 --> 00:43:26,960
Speaker 1: I what sort of children I'm breeding? Just as super

928
00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:32,960
Speaker 1: athletes the bee's knees. All right, Well, leave you to it.

929
00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:36,440
Speaker 2: All right, Wait, that's exciting.

930
00:43:36,680 --> 00:43:37,200
Speaker 1: I'm excited.

931
00:43:37,239 --> 00:43:40,799
Speaker 2: Let us know next week. I am bloody petrified of

932
00:43:41,400 --> 00:43:43,640
Speaker 2: I'm like my little Lalla. I just hope she's going

933
00:43:43,719 --> 00:43:44,879
Speaker 2: to do okay at school next year.

934
00:43:44,880 --> 00:43:47,439
Speaker 1: She's a bruiser, man, she's a bruiser. I think she'd

935
00:43:47,440 --> 00:43:48,479
Speaker 1: be good, she'd be fine.

936
00:43:48,520 --> 00:43:49,160
Speaker 2: She's excited.

937
00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:52,720
Speaker 1: She because she's she turns five in fab fab second

938
00:43:53,800 --> 00:43:56,080
Speaker 1: and school starts the week before that. So she's gonna

939
00:43:56,080 --> 00:43:59,240
Speaker 1: be fine. She's going to go straight in and slide

940
00:43:59,280 --> 00:44:02,640
Speaker 1: straight in, I promise, And if not, I'll go after

941
00:44:02,719 --> 00:44:03,440
Speaker 1: whoever it is.

942
00:44:03,600 --> 00:44:06,520
Speaker 2: Can I just say there was one there's one little child,

943
00:44:07,080 --> 00:44:10,040
Speaker 2: and she gave a couple of gifts, one to my

944
00:44:10,160 --> 00:44:12,600
Speaker 2: niece and one to Lola, and it was thank you

945
00:44:12,640 --> 00:44:14,520
Speaker 2: for being my best friend at daycare.

946
00:44:14,640 --> 00:44:15,359
Speaker 1: Oh that's sign.

947
00:44:15,520 --> 00:44:17,040
Speaker 2: And it was a book about here of the ten

948
00:44:17,080 --> 00:44:20,319
Speaker 2: reasons why you're my best friend. Kids are so good

949
00:44:20,400 --> 00:44:23,320
Speaker 2: and I was like, that is amazing. But I was

950
00:44:23,360 --> 00:44:26,120
Speaker 2: also liked was a can I wrap it now? And

951
00:44:26,160 --> 00:44:29,000
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, yeah, sure, And then she was

952
00:44:29,000 --> 00:44:31,239
Speaker 2: going around to everyone being like, look what I just

953
00:44:31,239 --> 00:44:33,040
Speaker 2: got and then did you get one? Well that's all good.

954
00:44:33,080 --> 00:44:35,080
Speaker 2: How are you check out this book? And I was like,

955
00:44:35,080 --> 00:44:37,359
Speaker 2: oh no, I'll hold onto that. She was like, fuck off,

956
00:44:37,400 --> 00:44:42,360
Speaker 2: it's my book, it's my presence. And I was like also,

957
00:44:42,840 --> 00:44:44,920
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, I don't. I don't have anything

958
00:44:44,960 --> 00:44:47,400
Speaker 2: for you, because the mom came over with and I

959
00:44:47,440 --> 00:44:49,240
Speaker 2: was like, well, can I give you.

960
00:44:49,520 --> 00:44:54,719
Speaker 1: Here's my keys? Matt. Last week you made me take

961
00:44:54,719 --> 00:44:57,879
Speaker 1: my shirt off, yeah, to show you my horsey. And

962
00:44:57,920 --> 00:44:59,719
Speaker 1: someone did say to me and now I'm a horse girl.

963
00:45:00,040 --> 00:45:00,959
Speaker 2: I are a big horse girl.

964
00:45:02,239 --> 00:45:05,040
Speaker 1: Anyway, you know what breed of horse the drawing is

965
00:45:05,719 --> 00:45:08,480
Speaker 1: probably shut the pony. It thinks about right. But I

966
00:45:08,520 --> 00:45:10,720
Speaker 1: did mention in the last week's episode that my tatoo

967
00:45:10,719 --> 00:45:15,719
Speaker 1: as had something much more involved. He commented on the thing,

968
00:45:15,719 --> 00:45:18,520
Speaker 1: which is cute because he's a cute guy. And he

969
00:45:18,680 --> 00:45:22,040
Speaker 1: sent me the original drawing to show you what I meant.

970
00:45:22,239 --> 00:45:25,040
Speaker 1: To brace yourself for this, and then I'll get you

971
00:45:25,040 --> 00:45:27,279
Speaker 1: to explain what it is to the listeners free too.

972
00:45:27,320 --> 00:45:31,200
Speaker 1: What boom, oh life, Now you know what I mean.

973
00:45:31,239 --> 00:45:32,759
Speaker 1: I was not prepared for that.

974
00:45:33,440 --> 00:45:34,160
Speaker 3: Wow.

975
00:45:34,360 --> 00:45:36,400
Speaker 1: I may be able to break apples with my bare hands,

976
00:45:36,400 --> 00:45:37,240
Speaker 1: but that.

977
00:45:37,960 --> 00:45:42,320
Speaker 2: Also the horses in this photo, and it's a wreath

978
00:45:42,360 --> 00:45:47,040
Speaker 2: of flowers and roses and three beautiful stallions with a

979
00:45:47,040 --> 00:45:49,399
Speaker 2: couple of birds in the background. The horses have got

980
00:45:49,600 --> 00:45:53,239
Speaker 2: strong manes in this picture. And it's literally from the

981
00:45:53,239 --> 00:45:57,200
Speaker 2: top of your pants on your backside to pass the

982
00:45:57,200 --> 00:45:59,320
Speaker 2: middle of your back. That is huge. What would April

983
00:45:59,360 --> 00:46:02,160
Speaker 2: have said if you got this weird that you had

984
00:46:02,160 --> 00:46:04,200
Speaker 2: the self control to say, I'm not sure about this.

985
00:46:04,640 --> 00:46:08,120
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I just wasn't.

986
00:46:08,239 --> 00:46:08,319
Speaker 4: Like.

987
00:46:08,400 --> 00:46:10,440
Speaker 1: I love the drawing, but I don't have that. I

988
00:46:10,480 --> 00:46:13,799
Speaker 1: don't have that in me. Yeah can I He had

989
00:46:13,840 --> 00:46:15,000
Speaker 1: more faith in me than I did.

990
00:46:15,239 --> 00:46:16,200
Speaker 2: You've done the right thing here.

991
00:46:16,640 --> 00:46:19,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, I like it. I was like nearly just going

992
00:46:19,080 --> 00:46:21,680
Speaker 1: to get it and I was like, Oh, otherwise that

993
00:46:21,719 --> 00:46:23,640
Speaker 1: would have really hurt anyway.

994
00:46:23,880 --> 00:46:27,080
Speaker 2: That's that I'm just going to really quickly for listener questions.

995
00:46:27,920 --> 00:46:31,560
Speaker 2: We did mention the RSL in regards to the venue

996
00:46:31,560 --> 00:46:35,080
Speaker 2: where Marley had an end of year dance concert. I'm

997
00:46:35,080 --> 00:46:39,640
Speaker 2: a bit of a mumbler RSL. Someone from overseas, her

998
00:46:39,680 --> 00:46:41,600
Speaker 2: name is Karen shan out to Karen message in the

999
00:46:41,600 --> 00:46:45,080
Speaker 2: Facebook group and she said Marley's dance was at the

1000
00:46:45,600 --> 00:46:47,279
Speaker 2: RSL as in like.

1001
00:46:47,360 --> 00:46:50,200
Speaker 1: A r I s E L IRSL.

1002
00:46:50,480 --> 00:46:55,120
Speaker 2: Rs L as like one word, not the liker s

1003
00:46:55,440 --> 00:46:58,480
Speaker 2: L letters. Yes, so what does that stand for?

1004
00:46:58,960 --> 00:47:02,800
Speaker 1: It's return services? Is league something league? Let's go league?

1005
00:47:03,400 --> 00:47:07,240
Speaker 1: So RSL RSL is the shortening of that. It's an acronym,

1006
00:47:07,280 --> 00:47:09,520
Speaker 1: if you will. So, Karen, just so you know, I'm

1007
00:47:09,520 --> 00:47:11,719
Speaker 1: speaking to you directly and anyone else who doesn't know

1008
00:47:11,760 --> 00:47:16,480
Speaker 1: what RSL means. It is a pub slash casino.

1009
00:47:16,880 --> 00:47:20,279
Speaker 2: Yes, esque raises money. I don't forget into the.

1010
00:47:20,960 --> 00:47:22,879
Speaker 1: No, but I do know one thing. They always have

1011
00:47:23,480 --> 00:47:26,880
Speaker 1: board that and the board of directors photos up on

1012
00:47:26,960 --> 00:47:29,359
Speaker 1: the wall somewhere and they're all white. Old man.

1013
00:47:29,560 --> 00:47:35,120
Speaker 2: Yes, does can confirm RSL stands for returned and Services League.

1014
00:47:35,360 --> 00:47:37,920
Speaker 1: There you go, there you go. Sorry, I am banned

1015
00:47:37,920 --> 00:47:40,360
Speaker 1: from multiple RSLs.

1016
00:47:40,400 --> 00:47:44,520
Speaker 2: Just so you know, ash it's time for.

1017
00:47:47,880 --> 00:47:49,560
Speaker 1: Ristmas Fails now.

1018
00:47:49,560 --> 00:47:51,560
Speaker 2: If you're joining us for the very first time, this

1019
00:47:51,640 --> 00:47:56,000
Speaker 2: is where we celebrate all the wild and terrible disasters

1020
00:47:56,000 --> 00:48:00,000
Speaker 2: that happened during the festive season. And let's be honest, No, Chris,

1021
00:48:00,120 --> 00:48:02,839
Speaker 2: is this complete without some mild disaster? Oh?

1022
00:48:02,920 --> 00:48:04,200
Speaker 1: No, awesome drama.

1023
00:48:04,560 --> 00:48:06,200
Speaker 2: I love it. We had the divorce last week.

1024
00:48:06,280 --> 00:48:09,920
Speaker 1: We also had the uncle. Oh yes, there's always an uncle.

1025
00:48:10,120 --> 00:48:12,480
Speaker 2: If you've got a situation where your uncle has done

1026
00:48:12,520 --> 00:48:15,680
Speaker 2: something inappropriate, please get it off your chest and send

1027
00:48:15,719 --> 00:48:15,960
Speaker 2: it in.

1028
00:48:16,239 --> 00:48:17,520
Speaker 1: Why are they so good at that?

1029
00:48:18,200 --> 00:48:19,840
Speaker 2: There's always one rogue uncle?

1030
00:48:20,719 --> 00:48:24,280
Speaker 1: So this same was body by Audi Good different Matthew.

1031
00:48:24,280 --> 00:48:25,800
Speaker 2: I'm gonna go first, please, Ashton.

1032
00:48:25,880 --> 00:48:29,040
Speaker 1: And this one is from Rachel, Hey, Rachel, and Rachel

1033
00:48:29,080 --> 00:48:32,080
Speaker 1: says she remembers one Christmas as a kid that was

1034
00:48:32,120 --> 00:48:36,439
Speaker 1: a real catastrophe, emphasizing the cat So here we go.

1035
00:48:36,960 --> 00:48:39,560
Speaker 1: Mum was in charge of baking desserts for the family,

1036
00:48:39,640 --> 00:48:42,400
Speaker 1: so she spent the day tirelessly baking in the kitchen,

1037
00:48:42,440 --> 00:48:46,480
Speaker 1: whipping up pav a feather sponge and a Christmas pudding,

1038
00:48:47,040 --> 00:48:50,480
Speaker 1: all proudly displayed in the forbidden front room.

1039
00:48:50,680 --> 00:48:53,600
Speaker 2: Can I just say delicious spread.

1040
00:48:53,280 --> 00:48:56,279
Speaker 1: Great selection, great work, My love that us kids knew

1041
00:48:56,320 --> 00:49:01,000
Speaker 1: better than to even breathe near the doorway Christmas Day,

1042
00:49:01,360 --> 00:49:04,879
Speaker 1: Well said the family cat. However, she did not care

1043
00:49:04,960 --> 00:49:09,160
Speaker 1: for unspoken rules. Classic cat Santa wasn't the only one

1044
00:49:09,200 --> 00:49:12,120
Speaker 1: who snuck into the house that night. Somehow the cat

1045
00:49:12,200 --> 00:49:15,680
Speaker 1: got into the front room, jumped on the table, and

1046
00:49:15,840 --> 00:49:20,400
Speaker 1: started her midnight de gestation by helping herself to brandy

1047
00:49:20,560 --> 00:49:24,360
Speaker 1: sauce a top of the pudding. Then she tap danced

1048
00:49:24,400 --> 00:49:27,680
Speaker 1: her way across the sponge like it was her personal stage,

1049
00:49:27,920 --> 00:49:31,520
Speaker 1: destroying it entirely as her paws sunk in like sand,

1050
00:49:32,200 --> 00:49:36,120
Speaker 1: only to finish strong by licking the pav dry it's cream.

1051
00:49:37,080 --> 00:49:40,040
Speaker 1: A true festive feast was had by the cat. Pretty

1052
00:49:40,080 --> 00:49:42,560
Speaker 1: sure we only had a fruit plat for dessert on

1053
00:49:42,719 --> 00:49:43,520
Speaker 1: Christmas Day.

1054
00:49:43,840 --> 00:49:46,799
Speaker 2: And you just know as well when that comes out

1055
00:49:46,840 --> 00:49:49,240
Speaker 2: the backside of that cat, that is going to cause

1056
00:49:49,280 --> 00:49:53,439
Speaker 2: an almighty mess. Oh that little box in it, it's

1057
00:49:53,480 --> 00:49:54,640
Speaker 2: like an Alan brickman.

1058
00:49:55,600 --> 00:49:58,120
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I wonder what the cat's name was.

1059
00:49:58,840 --> 00:50:01,040
Speaker 2: Please, if you have any pet involved in the story.

1060
00:50:01,160 --> 00:50:06,600
Speaker 2: Give us the full detail breed age name. For those wondering,

1061
00:50:06,600 --> 00:50:08,360
Speaker 2: Alan Alan.

1062
00:50:07,840 --> 00:50:10,799
Speaker 1: Rickman, Alan Rickman. Sorry, it was a dog that ate

1063
00:50:10,880 --> 00:50:13,520
Speaker 1: all of the cross for Christmas and then shat all

1064
00:50:13,520 --> 00:50:16,360
Speaker 1: over the presence a banger. That was a banging story.

1065
00:50:16,920 --> 00:50:19,480
Speaker 2: This is from Cara. She writes, we do Secret Santa

1066
00:50:19,640 --> 00:50:22,280
Speaker 2: Steel at Christmas.

1067
00:50:22,440 --> 00:50:25,040
Speaker 1: There's a name for that. I Yankee swall.

1068
00:50:25,320 --> 00:50:27,799
Speaker 2: I've never done this myself. We've always done Secret Sander

1069
00:50:27,800 --> 00:50:30,839
Speaker 2: where it's allocated name. You know you're getting the present four.

1070
00:50:31,080 --> 00:50:32,439
Speaker 2: But this is one where I think you just put

1071
00:50:32,440 --> 00:50:34,400
Speaker 2: the presents in a pile and you pick one, and

1072
00:50:34,440 --> 00:50:38,000
Speaker 2: you pick one. I think so last year my hobby

1073
00:50:38,480 --> 00:50:42,440
Speaker 2: brought a joke chocolate Willie for those wondering, Yes, that

1074
00:50:42,600 --> 00:50:46,640
Speaker 2: means penis nice as the Secret Sander present. But the

1075
00:50:46,719 --> 00:50:50,640
Speaker 2: last person to select a present was oh god, Granny

1076
00:50:52,640 --> 00:50:56,520
Speaker 2: the shark, the horror, and no one wanted to trade.

1077
00:50:57,280 --> 00:51:01,799
Speaker 2: Now my hubby is banned and taking part in secrets genius.

1078
00:51:02,200 --> 00:51:03,640
Speaker 2: That's a good way to get out of it. But

1079
00:51:03,719 --> 00:51:06,799
Speaker 2: also just don't own up to that. You're like, who

1080
00:51:06,960 --> 00:51:09,440
Speaker 2: was that buying inappropriate gifts for Granny?

1081
00:51:09,520 --> 00:51:12,919
Speaker 1: I'm going to do that. I love the ones where

1082
00:51:12,920 --> 00:51:16,120
Speaker 1: they're like they gift then things. That's from her house.

1083
00:51:16,120 --> 00:51:18,480
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that's gold I got on the quick. One

1084
00:51:18,880 --> 00:51:21,799
Speaker 2: is from Lucy. I did a message in the Life

1085
00:51:21,840 --> 00:51:24,680
Speaker 2: Uncut group shout out to Life on Time, what a

1086
00:51:24,680 --> 00:51:26,720
Speaker 2: great podcast, really beautiful.

1087
00:51:26,760 --> 00:51:31,080
Speaker 1: I never shout oude carry on. I wonder why they

1088
00:51:31,080 --> 00:51:31,719
Speaker 1: don't shout.

1089
00:51:34,320 --> 00:51:37,040
Speaker 2: From Lucy. When my brother was about four, he went

1090
00:51:37,040 --> 00:51:40,080
Speaker 2: into my parents' room at very early hour of the

1091
00:51:40,120 --> 00:51:43,600
Speaker 2: morning and asked if he could open a present, and

1092
00:51:43,680 --> 00:51:49,880
Speaker 2: my dad, you know, dad was half asleep, and said, yeah, fine,

1093
00:51:52,200 --> 00:51:54,919
Speaker 2: Oh no, I've done that before where you could ask

1094
00:51:55,000 --> 00:51:57,440
Speaker 2: me anything like where's the car keys and to like

1095
00:51:57,520 --> 00:52:00,399
Speaker 2: Marley when she was for a but just just park

1096
00:52:00,440 --> 00:52:01,080
Speaker 2: it back in the garage.

1097
00:52:01,120 --> 00:52:03,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, be careful your mom's car.

1098
00:52:04,400 --> 00:52:07,080
Speaker 2: So when my parents went downstairs in the morning, they

1099
00:52:07,160 --> 00:52:16,160
Speaker 2: discovered he had opened every single present under the tree, everyone,

1100
00:52:16,280 --> 00:52:17,480
Speaker 2: every single one.

1101
00:52:17,560 --> 00:52:20,640
Speaker 1: He just free rein good.

1102
00:52:20,400 --> 00:52:23,560
Speaker 2: For trust a four year old that's got no self control.

1103
00:52:23,840 --> 00:52:26,080
Speaker 2: My mum was pissed. Imagine all that wrapping to be

1104
00:52:26,160 --> 00:52:29,040
Speaker 2: totally wasted. Oh that's a disaster.

1105
00:52:29,239 --> 00:52:34,000
Speaker 1: That is a disaster. And we lave it. We love it. Ah,

1106
00:52:34,920 --> 00:52:37,480
Speaker 1: And this festive season if you've got a story just

1107
00:52:37,640 --> 00:52:38,240
Speaker 1: like that.

1108
00:52:38,200 --> 00:52:41,520
Speaker 2: Send it in go On. And also this festive season,

1109
00:52:41,560 --> 00:52:45,880
Speaker 2: if you're thinking about indulging in anything at all, just

1110
00:52:45,960 --> 00:52:47,279
Speaker 2: remember go on.

1111
00:52:47,920 --> 00:52:48,960
Speaker 1: It's Christmas.

1112
00:52:49,160 --> 00:52:51,120
Speaker 2: You deserve it. And thanks for Aldi for making this

1113
00:52:51,160 --> 00:52:57,040
Speaker 2: segment possible. Aldi, good different Ash, Yes, my friend, I've

1114
00:52:57,040 --> 00:52:58,560
Speaker 2: got to check if Marley's been trying to get hold

1115
00:52:58,600 --> 00:52:59,719
Speaker 2: of me from sick Bay.

1116
00:53:00,040 --> 00:53:03,240
Speaker 1: If you've enjoyed this episode, please like, subscribe, leave a review?

1117
00:53:03,280 --> 00:53:04,640
Speaker 1: Why not share it?

1118
00:53:05,000 --> 00:53:05,759
Speaker 2: Why the hell not?

1119
00:53:06,000 --> 00:53:07,440
Speaker 1: Why not? I always ask.

1120
00:53:07,320 --> 00:53:09,880
Speaker 2: Myself that it's never too late to leave a review.

1121
00:53:10,000 --> 00:53:11,719
Speaker 1: It's never why it's always why not?

1122
00:53:12,080 --> 00:53:15,480
Speaker 2: Thank you? And I think you'll feel better for leaving

1123
00:53:15,480 --> 00:53:15,880
Speaker 2: a review.

1124
00:53:16,000 --> 00:53:19,440
Speaker 1: Yeah it just consider it a Christmas present to us.

1125
00:53:19,640 --> 00:53:22,479
Speaker 2: Yes, thank you, thank you. And also on social media

1126
00:53:22,600 --> 00:53:25,520
Speaker 2: you can find us two Darting Dads on TikTok on

1127
00:53:25,640 --> 00:53:29,280
Speaker 2: Instagram and there is a Facebook group which is just driving.

1128
00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:33,000
Speaker 2: It is just humping And we will see you guys

1129
00:53:33,160 --> 00:53:35,800
Speaker 2: next week to find out what was yourward got.

1130
00:53:35,680 --> 00:54:00,239
Speaker 3: Oscar weeks bye.

1131
00:54:04,440 --> 00:54:08,080
Speaker 2: Two Doting Dance podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country

1132
00:54:08,080 --> 00:54:12,279
Speaker 2: throughout Australia and the connections to land, sea and community.

1133
00:54:12,040 --> 00:54:14,520
Speaker 1: We pay our respects to their elders past and present,

1134
00:54:14,600 --> 00:54:17,520
Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and torrestraight on

1135
00:54:17,600 --> 00:54:21,359
Speaker 1: the people's today. This episode was recorded on Gatagal Land.

1136
00:54:21,920 --> 00:54:24,040
Speaker 1: I was a good so loon.

1137
00:54:25,320 --> 00:54:28,319
Speaker 4: Twitchin huh excuse okay.

1138
00:54:30,080 --> 00:54:31,640
Speaker 2: In the throne and no.

1139
00:54:33,480 --> 00:54:36,920
Speaker 4: Please, it was a queen that I meant to be.

1140
00:54:37,320 --> 00:54:41,400
Speaker 4: I lived to lift China.

1141
00:54:40,560 --> 00:54:43,600
Speaker 1: Such all gardens on my own.

1142
00:54:43,520 --> 00:54:45,880
Speaker 3: Place because the problem.

1143
00:54:46,800 --> 00:54:52,680
Speaker 4: That's so well, I know that's so. I'm the true,

1144
00:54:52,840 --> 00:55:01,239
Speaker 4: said ay hiding. No, I'm Shina like come bna because

1145
00:55:01,360 --> 00:55:04,960
Speaker 4: we are. Hunter's voice is stronger.

1146
00:55:05,520 --> 00:55:08,240
Speaker 2: No, nobody