WEBVTT - ASK UNCUT - Not unless you've showered 0:00:00.880 --> 0:00:05.280 Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout 0:00:05.320 --> 0:00:09.080 Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We 0:00:09.160 --> 0:00:11.959 pay our respect to their elders past and present and 0:00:12.039 --> 0:00:15.360 extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait islander 0:00:15.360 --> 0:00:16.120 peoples today. 0:00:16.320 --> 0:00:19.599 This episode is recorded on Gaddigal Land of the Aurora Nation. 0:00:39.159 --> 0:00:42.320 Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life 0:00:42.320 --> 0:00:46.800 on Cut. This is our Ask Uncut episode where we 0:00:46.840 --> 0:00:50.160 answer all of your deep you're duck and your burning questions. 0:00:50.400 --> 0:00:53.320 I'm Laura and I'm Brittany, and you threw me off there. 0:00:53.720 --> 0:00:56.680 I could see your because you always start with I'm Laura. 0:00:57.440 --> 0:00:59.640 I literally I changed the whole sentence and britt was 0:00:59.680 --> 0:01:00.760 like what I do with my hand? 0:01:00.800 --> 0:01:02.720 And it honestly goes to show you like when you're 0:01:02.760 --> 0:01:04.720 in such a routine, in a habit, just you just 0:01:04.800 --> 0:01:06.040 really throw a spanner in the works. 0:01:06.080 --> 0:01:08.959 But maybe we should start mixing up our intros because 0:01:09.120 --> 0:01:11.240 you try and you used to cut me off at 0:01:11.240 --> 0:01:13.200 the knees, because look at what happens when we try 0:01:13.240 --> 0:01:15.840 and do it. There's a brawl almost breaks out in 0:01:15.880 --> 0:01:18.240 the podcast studio. Here we are No, this. 0:01:18.200 --> 0:01:20.839 Is our Thursday edition where yeah, you're run any questions 0:01:20.840 --> 0:01:22.280 and we absolutely love them. 0:01:22.280 --> 0:01:24.600 We have some bangers coming up. 0:01:24.800 --> 0:01:27.760 We have one very juicy question, which the reason why 0:01:27.880 --> 0:01:30.440 I picked it was because this was an argument that 0:01:30.480 --> 0:01:33.760 I also had with Matt. Wasn't an argument, Look, I 0:01:33.800 --> 0:01:35.720 mean it kind of was, but it was something that 0:01:35.760 --> 0:01:37.920 we unpacked this week and then I brought it to 0:01:37.959 --> 0:01:40.840 brit and spoke about it. Did you to do with sex? 0:01:41.160 --> 0:01:42.240 And you agreed with him and. 0:01:42.200 --> 0:01:44.520 Not with me. I don't even remember this. 0:01:44.800 --> 0:01:45.839 You will, don't worry. 0:01:46.200 --> 0:01:48.720 I'm actually like, what when did I talk about sex 0:01:48.760 --> 0:01:52.360 with Matt this week? I like, I feel like that's 0:01:52.400 --> 0:01:55.600 been a few four nights. No, I actually am am 0:01:55.600 --> 0:01:57.360 intrigued to hear what this is even though I've had 0:01:57.360 --> 0:02:00.559 the conversation, because right now it cannot pull it into 0:02:00.560 --> 0:02:01.320 the front of mind. 0:02:01.400 --> 0:02:03.480 Well, before we get into answering your questions, if you 0:02:03.560 --> 0:02:05.280 guys do have one that you want to send in 0:02:05.320 --> 0:02:07.320 for next week's episode, or even one that we put 0:02:07.320 --> 0:02:10.280 on the radio show, you can write into our podcast, 0:02:10.320 --> 0:02:13.720 which is at Life Uncut podcast, Slide on into the DMS, 0:02:13.919 --> 0:02:16.880 just put Ask Uncut at the top, and then we 0:02:16.960 --> 0:02:19.760 have an amazing admin person now named Taylor who goes 0:02:19.800 --> 0:02:21.520 in and she gets all of your questions and she 0:02:21.560 --> 0:02:24.480 puts him into a spreadsheet, so you are completely anonymous. 0:02:24.520 --> 0:02:28.120 The only person who knows who sends in those questions now, 0:02:28.160 --> 0:02:31.000 not even Britter I. It's just Taylor and she's a vault. 0:02:31.080 --> 0:02:33.200 And she also doesn't look either. 0:02:33.320 --> 0:02:35.320 She doesn't go deep diving into you, guys, just so 0:02:35.360 --> 0:02:37.880 you know, you are completely anonymous. 0:02:37.880 --> 0:02:39.720 So you can send them in as weird or as 0:02:39.720 --> 0:02:42.000 wonderful as you want, but send them in for next weeks. 0:02:42.000 --> 0:02:43.760 But we have a couple of doozies for you today. 0:02:43.800 --> 0:02:46.200 But before we get into unpacking that, there is something 0:02:46.240 --> 0:02:48.520 that we wanted to briefly talk about and the reason 0:02:48.560 --> 0:02:51.160 for that is because you guys might remember a couple 0:02:51.240 --> 0:02:54.200 of weeks ago we interviewed Moana Hope and her partner 0:02:54.240 --> 0:02:57.880 Billa Carlstrom, who are having a baby. Moana is currently pregnant. 0:02:58.120 --> 0:03:00.880 But the reason why Moana is so famous and many 0:03:00.919 --> 0:03:02.799 of you would know of her and who she is 0:03:02.800 --> 0:03:06.040 is because she is one of aflw's pioneering women in 0:03:06.080 --> 0:03:08.800 the sport. And she spoke on that episode around the 0:03:08.840 --> 0:03:13.040 pay discrepancy between female athletes and male athletes, and how 0:03:13.120 --> 0:03:16.200 even though she when she was playing in AFLW, she 0:03:16.320 --> 0:03:18.280 was at the absolute top of her game. She was 0:03:18.320 --> 0:03:20.360 playing for Collingwood and she was one of the highest 0:03:20.360 --> 0:03:23.040 paid women at the time in AFLW, and she was 0:03:23.160 --> 0:03:27.240 still earning less than what is the pension within Australia. 0:03:27.280 --> 0:03:29.680 That is how poorly paid she was paid when she 0:03:29.760 --> 0:03:31.480 was playing in the sport. Well, at the end of 0:03:31.480 --> 0:03:34.600 the day, she was expected. 0:03:33.960 --> 0:03:37.200 To train and perform like a professional athlete, because well 0:03:37.280 --> 0:03:39.200 she was a professional athlete. She was at the best 0:03:39.240 --> 0:03:41.000 of a game, but she had to quit the game. 0:03:41.240 --> 0:03:44.880 She had to give up afl because she couldn't afford 0:03:44.920 --> 0:03:47.160 to She was better off. She's like, I was better 0:03:47.200 --> 0:03:48.400 off to go and get another job and go on 0:03:48.440 --> 0:03:51.160 the doll than I was to play professional sport. But 0:03:51.320 --> 0:03:55.200 the demands were exactly the same as professional male athlete. 0:03:55.240 --> 0:03:57.120 Now this is absolutely huge news. 0:03:57.360 --> 0:03:59.800 I mean it's still it is still laughable when we 0:03:59.840 --> 0:04:01.120 tell you the actual numbers. 0:04:01.520 --> 0:04:05.760 But the AFLW players did win a ninety four percent 0:04:05.920 --> 0:04:09.920 pay increase this week, so this is a giant step forward. 0:04:09.920 --> 0:04:14.520 Now ninety four percent sounds absolutely huge, right. 0:04:14.280 --> 0:04:16.440 But I think Also, when you think about a percentage, 0:04:16.480 --> 0:04:19.760 it just shows what that discrepancy was prior. So now 0:04:19.839 --> 0:04:22.560 moving forward, players on Tier one contract clubs will now 0:04:22.600 --> 0:04:25.600 get seventy one, nine hundred and thirty five a season, 0:04:25.839 --> 0:04:28.960 which is up from thirty seven one hundred and fifty five. 0:04:29.200 --> 0:04:32.280 Which when you think if that being somebody's entire job 0:04:32.400 --> 0:04:36.599 and they have to sacrifice so much, sacrifice their other work, 0:04:36.760 --> 0:04:39.440 sacrifice all of their time, they have to train their 0:04:39.440 --> 0:04:41.600 asses off in order to be able to compete at 0:04:41.600 --> 0:04:44.720 a level, that's entertaining that advertisers want to put their 0:04:44.720 --> 0:04:47.839 money behind. It still isn't a huge amount of money, 0:04:48.080 --> 0:04:50.080 but it's a massive step in the right direction. 0:04:50.240 --> 0:04:52.480 Well, more than forty players now are expected to earn 0:04:52.520 --> 0:04:55.400 more than one hundred thousand dollars, which is it's incredible, 0:04:55.440 --> 0:04:57.480 But if you still pull up the stats and the 0:04:57.560 --> 0:04:59.640 numbers that the men are earning, it doesn't even touch 0:04:59.640 --> 0:05:02.240 the side. It's because these guys are earning hundreds and 0:05:02.320 --> 0:05:05.440 hundreds of thousands of dollars into the millions of dollars, 0:05:05.480 --> 0:05:08.719 so the difference is absolutely ludicrous. We're applauding the pay 0:05:08.760 --> 0:05:12.080 increase one hundred percent, but it is not comparable. Well. 0:05:12.120 --> 0:05:14.520 I think it's such an interesting conversation though, and I 0:05:14.680 --> 0:05:17.960 know that there's many debates that play out across how 0:05:18.040 --> 0:05:20.159 much women in sport should be paid and whether it 0:05:20.200 --> 0:05:23.960 should be reflective of the advertising dollars that advertisers are 0:05:24.000 --> 0:05:29.120 spending now. Obviously, especially in sports like AFL, men's sport 0:05:29.160 --> 0:05:31.919 has been around for so much longer, it is very 0:05:31.960 --> 0:05:35.240 well established, and so advertisers pay incredible amounts of money 0:05:35.279 --> 0:05:38.839 in order to advertise alongside their games, which then obviously 0:05:38.880 --> 0:05:40.919 means that men are paid more from that as well. 0:05:41.720 --> 0:05:44.719 There's this debate that like, the advertising dollars simply aren't 0:05:44.720 --> 0:05:46.839 there for women's sport yet, and that's why women are 0:05:46.839 --> 0:05:49.160 paid such a low percentage. But I think in these 0:05:49.200 --> 0:05:51.320 sorts of situations, and the big thing to keep into 0:05:51.360 --> 0:05:54.200 perspective is that it's a chicken before the egg scenario 0:05:54.720 --> 0:05:57.400 unless money is poured into the sport and it is 0:05:57.480 --> 0:06:00.400 made as entertaining as what the men's sports is. Unless 0:06:00.400 --> 0:06:02.280 it's you know, they put them on the same sort 0:06:02.320 --> 0:06:04.720 of platforms, unless they really hype up the games, put 0:06:04.760 --> 0:06:07.720 them in the same stadiums, all the other fun stuff 0:06:07.720 --> 0:06:11.640 that goes along with watching professional athletes play. Adding that 0:06:11.800 --> 0:06:15.560 extra entertainment value goes so far in getting so many 0:06:15.600 --> 0:06:17.520 other people to watch the game, not just people who 0:06:17.560 --> 0:06:19.400 are interested in the sport, but people who watch it 0:06:19.400 --> 0:06:21.640 because they want to have fun. I have a fun day, 0:06:21.960 --> 0:06:24.560 be entertained. And I remember talking to mat about this 0:06:24.600 --> 0:06:28.200 because I was like, I personally don't like football, but 0:06:28.240 --> 0:06:30.720 I will happily go and watch a football game at 0:06:30.760 --> 0:06:34.000 a big stadium because the atmosphere is so fun, the 0:06:34.160 --> 0:06:38.080 environment is so engaging, and it's like female sport unless 0:06:38.080 --> 0:06:40.160 they had the same amount of money being poured into it, 0:06:40.480 --> 0:06:43.200 can't compete with that sort of entertainment factor. 0:06:43.480 --> 0:06:47.360 Yeah. And in another huge, huge landmark equal pay win 0:06:47.680 --> 0:06:51.720 last well earlier this week women in America. So if 0:06:51.760 --> 0:06:54.800 you play soccer now or football for the United States, 0:06:54.960 --> 0:06:57.880 you will be paid an equal amount as the men, 0:06:58.000 --> 0:06:59.839 which is absolutely huge. This has been going on for 0:06:59.839 --> 0:07:01.960 three three years, this case for three years for them 0:07:02.040 --> 0:07:05.120 fighting for equal pay, and this is really setting an 0:07:05.160 --> 0:07:07.960 international standard here on in in the soccer world and 0:07:07.960 --> 0:07:10.480 hopefully in the sporting world. We do hope that this 0:07:10.840 --> 0:07:13.200 sets a precedent and it is a flow on effect. Well. 0:07:13.240 --> 0:07:16.400 Also, it goes to kind of change that conversation, and 0:07:16.520 --> 0:07:19.640 it shows that there is shifting perceptions around women in 0:07:19.680 --> 0:07:22.640 sport and that women want to watch women in sport, 0:07:22.720 --> 0:07:24.800 and not just that, but everybody wants to watch women 0:07:24.840 --> 0:07:26.720 in sport. And I think that, you know, as this 0:07:26.760 --> 0:07:29.560 new generation of kids come through, as a new generation 0:07:29.640 --> 0:07:33.200 of incredible sporting stars come through, they're given the opportunity 0:07:33.240 --> 0:07:35.560 to be able to play to the same standard that 0:07:35.640 --> 0:07:39.000 men are because for so long, women haven't really had 0:07:39.000 --> 0:07:41.600 the option to go into professional sports because the money 0:07:41.680 --> 0:07:44.280 just wasn't there and it wasn't worth their time or 0:07:44.400 --> 0:07:48.400 their energy. Now, with that conversation out of the way, 0:07:48.440 --> 0:07:50.760 there is something I wanted to ask you, Britt and 0:07:50.800 --> 0:07:52.480 had a conversation I don't remember I had that the 0:07:52.480 --> 0:07:56.080 conversation you don't remember you had, and it's very very intimate. Oh, 0:07:58.120 --> 0:08:03.160 if you're dating someone and you guys have a healthy, active, 0:08:03.200 --> 0:08:06.880 great sex life, I still don't like, how do I 0:08:06.920 --> 0:08:09.360 word this? Okay, if you're dating someone you guys have 0:08:09.400 --> 0:08:12.160 an active sex life, just say you have a shower 0:08:12.200 --> 0:08:13.920 in the morning. You haven't done any X, Like you 0:08:13.920 --> 0:08:16.000 haven't gone for a run, you haven't done anything. That's 0:08:16.040 --> 0:08:20.040 like you've just been living. You've just been wearing clothes 0:08:20.040 --> 0:08:23.000 throughout the day, You've just been living. If you then 0:08:23.040 --> 0:08:25.080 have sex, it's say four o'clock in the afternoon, but 0:08:25.120 --> 0:08:27.240 you had a shower in the morning, would you let 0:08:27.280 --> 0:08:29.960 your partner go down on you or would you not 0:08:30.400 --> 0:08:32.319 let your partner go down on you because you haven't 0:08:32.400 --> 0:08:37.240 just showered. Well, this is so intimate, Like how many 0:08:37.280 --> 0:08:39.960 hours closed shower until you would allow someone to go 0:08:40.000 --> 0:08:40.560 down on you. 0:08:40.679 --> 0:08:43.240 I mean, I don't think there's a set number. I 0:08:43.280 --> 0:08:45.360 don't think I put a timer on my phone. I'm like, oh, 0:08:45.440 --> 0:08:47.640 you pass them, you pass the hour. I mean, I 0:08:47.640 --> 0:08:50.360 think the general rule is if you feel like you're 0:08:51.200 --> 0:08:53.360 you're clean, and you haven't gone and run a marathon, 0:08:53.400 --> 0:08:54.959 and you're not sweaty and gross, you haven't been worked 0:08:54.960 --> 0:08:56.680 for eight hours, go for it. If I feel like 0:08:56.720 --> 0:08:58.560 I have been working all day and I have gone 0:08:58.559 --> 0:09:00.720 to the gym, No, of course, I wouldn't want someone 0:09:00.720 --> 0:09:02.640 to go down there. I wouldn't want them to go 0:09:02.679 --> 0:09:04.720 down there, let alone want them to go down there. 0:09:04.880 --> 0:09:07.520 I wouldn't want my partner to want to go down there, 0:09:07.840 --> 0:09:11.160 because I would want to reciprocate that, like I would 0:09:11.160 --> 0:09:13.240 not want to be going anywhere near something that had 0:09:13.280 --> 0:09:15.480 been sweating around for eight hours. 0:09:15.600 --> 0:09:17.839 Well, okay, I don't mean sweating around. I think let's 0:09:17.920 --> 0:09:19.839 just take the gym element out of it. Let's take 0:09:19.920 --> 0:09:22.800 exercise day to day living. But if you've just been 0:09:22.880 --> 0:09:26.160 living your life, walking around, just being alive, wearing clothes 0:09:26.679 --> 0:09:28.160 at the end of the day, you wouldn't let your 0:09:28.160 --> 0:09:29.400 partner go down on you? 0:09:29.480 --> 0:09:30.240 Now, would not? 0:09:30.280 --> 0:09:31.760 Would you go down on your partner? 0:09:31.760 --> 0:09:31.960 Though? 0:09:32.040 --> 0:09:34.560 No, because I have a shower, But would they have 0:09:34.600 --> 0:09:36.480 a shower? What if you're like in the moment and 0:09:36.480 --> 0:09:38.760 you've just like you've gotten home from work, you're having 0:09:38.800 --> 0:09:40.240 a hot makeout session. 0:09:40.240 --> 0:09:42.480 You pass it. I'd go straight to the end goal. 0:09:42.760 --> 0:09:45.319 This is wild to me. So, I mean, I've had 0:09:45.320 --> 0:09:49.920 this conversation with Matt because Matt is very staunchly against it, 0:09:49.960 --> 0:09:52.040 And if I am not freshly out of the shower, 0:09:52.360 --> 0:09:56.120 like I mean walking out of the shower, He's like, nah, 0:09:56.200 --> 0:09:57.040 not for me, I'm. 0:09:56.920 --> 0:09:58.599 Not going to do it. So it's going to be 0:09:58.640 --> 0:09:59.559 like a ten minute limit. 0:09:59.640 --> 0:10:01.720 Yeah, I reckon. The guy has a timer. But he's 0:10:01.760 --> 0:10:05.440 always been like this. Whereas what's his reasoning? He just 0:10:05.640 --> 0:10:07.679 he I guess I mean this is probably too much 0:10:07.720 --> 0:10:10.000 of a measure. I don't think he probably likes doing 0:10:10.040 --> 0:10:12.760 it very much, So it needs to be the perfect 0:10:13.280 --> 0:10:16.240 needs all of the situations and all of the scenario 0:10:16.240 --> 0:10:18.480 needs to be perfect for him to be encouraged to 0:10:18.480 --> 0:10:18.760 do it. 0:10:18.840 --> 0:10:20.800 I am literally now a picturreing you guys in a 0:10:20.840 --> 0:10:23.760 fire where you've been like, just do it, like, just 0:10:23.800 --> 0:10:25.680 go down there, and he's like, I don't want to, 0:10:25.760 --> 0:10:26.439 don't make. 0:10:26.320 --> 0:10:27.880 Me, and you're like, force his hand down. 0:10:28.320 --> 0:10:30.079 This is where my mind has gone right now. 0:10:30.440 --> 0:10:32.240 Never forcing he would just be like, just go and 0:10:32.280 --> 0:10:33.920 have a shower, and I kind of. 0:10:34.000 --> 0:10:35.640 You would be so stubborn that you'd be like, just 0:10:35.640 --> 0:10:37.880 do it. You can't have it this morning. 0:10:37.920 --> 0:10:39.400 If you can't have me at my worst, you don't 0:10:39.440 --> 0:10:40.400 deserve me at my bed. 0:10:40.520 --> 0:10:43.360 No half damn shower, Laura. Okay. 0:10:43.360 --> 0:10:45.480 My reason why I asked this is because I have 0:10:45.559 --> 0:10:47.719 definitely dated guys in the past where it has been 0:10:47.760 --> 0:10:50.800 an absolute non event. If anything, I'm the one that's like, no, oh, 0:10:50.960 --> 0:10:52.600 I want to go and have a shower after the 0:10:52.920 --> 0:10:56.120 living the day, whereas they would never like it would 0:10:56.120 --> 0:10:57.440 never have been an issue. 0:10:57.520 --> 0:10:59.079 I mean, it's just a personal preference. 0:10:59.120 --> 0:10:59.360 Isn't it. 0:10:59.400 --> 0:11:00.800 Of course it does at the end of the day. 0:11:00.800 --> 0:11:04.400 Of course it doesn't matter. Of course, it never matters. Like, actually, 0:11:04.440 --> 0:11:07.360 I think this all the time. You know, my favorite show. 0:11:07.360 --> 0:11:09.199 One of my favorite show's Outlander, which is set in 0:11:09.280 --> 0:11:10.920 seventeen hundreds in Scottish Highlands. 0:11:11.400 --> 0:11:12.960 It's such a sex field show, right. 0:11:13.120 --> 0:11:15.600 I always think this to myself when they're doing these 0:11:15.600 --> 0:11:17.400 scenes because it's very sex driven. 0:11:17.520 --> 0:11:19.760 But they're camping and they don't have showers. It's back 0:11:19.760 --> 0:11:20.200 in the day. 0:11:20.640 --> 0:11:22.360 They're not even camping. They just sleep on the ground, 0:11:22.440 --> 0:11:25.200 but there's so much sex and I'm like, when was 0:11:25.200 --> 0:11:26.160 the last time. 0:11:25.960 --> 0:11:26.760 You got shower? 0:11:26.800 --> 0:11:28.880 It? I always think that, I'm like, what, isn't this 0:11:29.040 --> 0:11:31.360 very e high genie? But I think it's just a 0:11:31.360 --> 0:11:34.120 personal preference. There's no right or wrong answer here, and 0:11:34.160 --> 0:11:35.720 it doesn't matter. You could go days without it and 0:11:35.720 --> 0:11:38.160 your partner might be into it. I would prefer my 0:11:38.280 --> 0:11:41.280 partner to be somewhat clean, and I would prefer. 0:11:41.120 --> 0:11:43.360 To be showered and clean. I mean, you're totally right. 0:11:43.400 --> 0:11:44.839 There is no right and wrong. There's no right or 0:11:44.880 --> 0:11:46.920 wrong in any of these situations. And I know that 0:11:46.960 --> 0:11:48.280 there are going to be a lot of people who 0:11:48.320 --> 0:11:50.160 are like, oh, yeah, my partner doesn't care, And then 0:11:50.160 --> 0:11:53.439 there's gonna be some people who, like you say, I 0:11:53.480 --> 0:11:55.480 don't like it, Like I wouldn't want my partner to 0:11:55.480 --> 0:11:57.360 go down there unless I've you know, had a little 0:11:57.360 --> 0:11:58.760 bird bath or something in between. 0:11:58.880 --> 0:12:00.400 Yeah, it's not a strong No, I'm not going to 0:12:00.480 --> 0:12:02.480 like karate kick him in the head to keep him away. 0:12:02.559 --> 0:12:04.400 But like, yeah, I guess it depends. 0:12:04.120 --> 0:12:06.120 On the moment and the person and the situation. And 0:12:06.200 --> 0:12:08.160 have you run a marathon or do you just sit 0:12:08.200 --> 0:12:08.880 at your office desk? 0:12:08.960 --> 0:12:10.680 Okay, but how many times have you like gone on 0:12:10.920 --> 0:12:12.360 to go down on a guy and then be like 0:12:12.559 --> 0:12:15.839 you have not washed this very recently, and I need 0:12:15.840 --> 0:12:17.440 this to stop right now, And then you have to 0:12:17.520 --> 0:12:19.240 just kind of like go straight back up like that 0:12:19.400 --> 0:12:19.959 never happened. 0:12:20.120 --> 0:12:23.079 That's why you just shower that this brings back. 0:12:23.280 --> 0:12:25.960 You've just proven you literally just came full circle and 0:12:26.040 --> 0:12:26.880 proved Matt's point. 0:12:26.960 --> 0:12:29.120 That's what you see. You are not good at this debating. 0:12:29.440 --> 0:12:31.559 It's not I don't think that Matt doesn't have a point. 0:12:31.600 --> 0:12:33.360 I just think that it shouldn't have to be the 0:12:33.480 --> 0:12:34.840 second you get out of a shower. 0:12:34.920 --> 0:12:37.040 No, that's that is extreme, Like there has. 0:12:36.880 --> 0:12:39.040 To be some like an hour two hours. 0:12:39.280 --> 0:12:41.920 Well comes into the shower fully clothed, like let's just 0:12:41.960 --> 0:12:44.400 do this now. Well the water's running, I haven't even 0:12:44.440 --> 0:12:48.360 towled off, and he's like, all right, time's a dicken anyway, Okay, 0:12:48.360 --> 0:12:50.480 I'd like to know how everyone else feels about the situation. 0:12:50.640 --> 0:12:52.959 Do you need to be like very very freshly showered 0:12:53.040 --> 0:12:56.080 or is there is there some level of just acceptance 0:12:56.120 --> 0:12:57.920 that you will have with your partner if you want 0:12:57.920 --> 0:13:00.880 to get down to frisky oral town. There's a lot 0:13:00.920 --> 0:13:01.400 their time. 0:13:02.040 --> 0:13:03.640 You bring the weirdst questions. 0:13:03.720 --> 0:13:06.000 Well, the reason why this came up is because somebody 0:13:06.200 --> 0:13:09.080 actually wrote this in as a question, and the question was, 0:13:09.559 --> 0:13:11.840 my boyfriend won't go down on me if I haven't 0:13:11.880 --> 0:13:14.679 just freshly showered, and it makes me feel really self conscious. 0:13:14.679 --> 0:13:17.120 And I was like, girlfriend, I feel you. I feel 0:13:17.160 --> 0:13:18.760 you to my call. So it is good. 0:13:18.760 --> 0:13:20.600 It is the thing people are running the questions in. 0:13:20.800 --> 0:13:22.960 There are lots of women in your situation too, Laura. 0:13:23.080 --> 0:13:25.319 So what was your feedback and advice there? Brittany Oh, 0:13:25.360 --> 0:13:26.920 for her, for anyone, I. 0:13:26.840 --> 0:13:28.760 Think you have to just respect your partner. I think 0:13:28.760 --> 0:13:30.840 you can't make if someone says I don't want. 0:13:30.720 --> 0:13:33.360 To go down on you, you can't just say fucking 0:13:33.400 --> 0:13:35.960 get it, son, like you've you've got to respect your 0:13:35.960 --> 0:13:39.079 partner's wishes. And like we just said, everyone's different. If 0:13:39.080 --> 0:13:42.080 somebody doesn't want to do something, unfortunately, that's not on 0:13:42.160 --> 0:13:44.160 you to be like, well I'm overruling you. 0:13:44.440 --> 0:13:47.200 Okay, No, And I totally agree with that, But I 0:13:47.200 --> 0:13:50.480 think in this situation, for example, that whole conversation of 0:13:50.559 --> 0:13:52.720 like I will only go down on you if you're 0:13:52.760 --> 0:13:55.920 freshly out of a shower, it's like, well, then obviously 0:13:56.120 --> 0:13:59.320 you just don't like evolver or a vagina at all, 0:13:59.360 --> 0:14:00.959 like you know, on your face near it. Because I 0:14:01.040 --> 0:14:03.640 don't agree with that you don't because I kind of think, well, yeah, 0:14:03.679 --> 0:14:05.600 like if you're only wanting to go there when it's 0:14:05.640 --> 0:14:07.760 like completely. 0:14:07.040 --> 0:14:07.960 Mean, that's okay. 0:14:08.040 --> 0:14:08.960 If someone wants that. 0:14:09.600 --> 0:14:12.120 If someone only wants to go near genitalia when that 0:14:12.320 --> 0:14:16.720 is clean, that is okay, Like that's one hundred percent fine. 0:14:16.760 --> 0:14:19.320 That doesn't mean they don't like vaginas or volvers or 0:14:19.680 --> 0:14:22.080 giving oral sex. It just means they're particular about when 0:14:22.120 --> 0:14:24.480 they do it. And I think that there's nothing to 0:14:24.520 --> 0:14:27.440 be self conscious about It's just your partner's opinion, and 0:14:27.640 --> 0:14:29.320 maybe you can talk Tom about it and tell him 0:14:29.360 --> 0:14:31.760 why it makes you feel like that, But then you 0:14:31.840 --> 0:14:34.800 have to also respect why it makes him feel like that. 0:14:34.880 --> 0:14:36.560 This is like a very much I'm meet in the 0:14:36.560 --> 0:14:38.600 middle and respect each other's opinion. 0:14:38.840 --> 0:14:44.040 All right, Let's get into other questions that have come in. Hey, girls, 0:14:44.080 --> 0:14:46.080 I have a predicament. I've been friends with this guy 0:14:46.080 --> 0:14:48.240 at UNI for around two years now. We spend so 0:14:48.360 --> 0:14:50.360 much time together, get on like a house on fire, 0:14:50.400 --> 0:14:53.320 and it's safe to say I've developed feelings. The issue 0:14:53.360 --> 0:14:55.480 is he has a long term girlfriend. He's been with 0:14:55.600 --> 0:14:57.600 his girlfriend for a couple of years, and I have 0:14:57.720 --> 0:15:01.200 met her at parties on many occasions. Although she's always 0:15:01.240 --> 0:15:03.080 been lovely to me and it's not my place to 0:15:03.120 --> 0:15:05.880 say it, although she's gonna say it anyway, I genuinely 0:15:06.040 --> 0:15:08.160 just don't think that they're good for each other. It 0:15:08.280 --> 0:15:11.600 frustrates me so much. I have found myself getting rather 0:15:11.680 --> 0:15:13.960 down about this lately, as I can't remember the last 0:15:13.960 --> 0:15:16.160 time but I clicked with someone like this, and it's 0:15:16.160 --> 0:15:19.800 stopping me from exploring other connections. I've been on other dates, 0:15:19.840 --> 0:15:22.760 but constantly find myself comparing everyone to him. I one 0:15:22.880 --> 0:15:25.080 hundred percent don't want to be a home wrecker, so 0:15:25.160 --> 0:15:26.840 need to find a way to figure this out and 0:15:26.920 --> 0:15:29.440 move on for the good of us. All would really 0:15:29.480 --> 0:15:33.320 appreciate some advice. I also should add people constantly ask 0:15:33.440 --> 0:15:35.520 us how long we've been together or dating, so I 0:15:35.520 --> 0:15:37.320 think it's safe to say that there is definitely a 0:15:37.400 --> 0:15:40.120 vibe or a connection there that other people can see. 0:15:40.560 --> 0:15:46.240 Help girl, cut and run baby this okay? 0:15:47.480 --> 0:15:48.800 I feel I need to break it down into a 0:15:48.800 --> 0:15:49.360 few segments. 0:15:50.880 --> 0:15:54.320 Firstly, you are one hundreds percent biased when you say 0:15:54.600 --> 0:15:56.080 it might be just me, but I don't think they're 0:15:56.120 --> 0:15:56.720 right for each other. 0:15:56.800 --> 0:15:58.760 You've been looking for reasons as to why they're. 0:15:58.640 --> 0:16:00.320 Not right for each other and their long term like 0:16:00.360 --> 0:16:03.160 there are a long term relationships. Something is working in 0:16:03.200 --> 0:16:05.480 that relationship for them to be long term. And yes, 0:16:05.640 --> 0:16:07.520 I am a really big believer that you can be 0:16:07.600 --> 0:16:09.960 friends with people from the opposite sex. You guys are at UNI, 0:16:10.080 --> 0:16:12.120 so you're spending a lot of time. You obviously have 0:16:12.440 --> 0:16:15.040 things in common because you're studying the same thing at university. 0:16:15.760 --> 0:16:18.320 I have male friends, and I think that is one 0:16:18.400 --> 0:16:21.440 hundred percent okay, to have. If there aren't feelings there, 0:16:21.560 --> 0:16:23.280 that's when it crosses a bit of a boundary. If 0:16:23.280 --> 0:16:24.920 you're in a relationship and you were friends with someone 0:16:24.960 --> 0:16:27.480 in the opposite sex and there's feelings, that's not cool. 0:16:27.680 --> 0:16:29.920 I do love that you haven't acted on it, and 0:16:29.960 --> 0:16:32.480 you're not saying anything because I don't think you can. 0:16:32.600 --> 0:16:34.880 He is an, you know, what, seems like a loving 0:16:34.920 --> 0:16:39.520 and long term relationship. If the relationship isn't right, it 0:16:39.560 --> 0:16:42.840 will end, it will run its course, and maybe you 0:16:42.880 --> 0:16:45.520 guys can keep just being friends. And if that time 0:16:45.560 --> 0:16:47.720 comes and he feels the same way, or if he 0:16:47.800 --> 0:16:49.960 did feel the same way, maybe he wouldn't be with 0:16:50.040 --> 0:16:50.520 his partner. 0:16:50.560 --> 0:16:52.040 Maybe he would end that relationship. 0:16:52.080 --> 0:16:55.240 But right now, he thinks that he has a really 0:16:55.280 --> 0:16:58.120 good friendship with you, which you do have, but he 0:16:58.120 --> 0:17:00.400 obviously thinks that's all it is. He's in a loving relationship. 0:17:00.480 --> 0:17:02.600 I don't think you can say anything. I think what 0:17:02.680 --> 0:17:05.320 you need to do is maintain a friendship with him 0:17:05.359 --> 0:17:06.520