WEBVTT - FULL SHOW: Finding The One & Gender Disappointment 0:00:10.379 --> 0:00:14.219 Hi Heart podcasts, hear more Kiss podcast playlist and listen 0:00:14.259 --> 0:00:20.459 live on the Free iHeart app A good Pickup with 0:00:20.539 --> 0:00:23.178 Britt Hockley and Laura Burn Radio. 0:00:23.339 --> 0:00:25.538 What our windows down? 0:00:25.819 --> 0:00:29.579 That's my world? Risen the dust only good bugle down. 0:00:30.619 --> 0:00:34.179 I've done March, but yeah, I'm not our. 0:00:34.099 --> 0:00:37.019 Big get and what I want it don't matter where 0:00:37.379 --> 0:00:38.859 does this is the pickup? 0:00:39.379 --> 0:00:42.219 Hello, it's the pickup with Britt Hockley and Laura Burn. 0:00:42.899 --> 0:00:45.379 I am so excited I'm just gonna have I mean, 0:00:45.379 --> 0:00:49.098 this is so excited that you am spilt frape right 0:00:49.099 --> 0:00:49.939 down in the front of yourself. 0:00:49.939 --> 0:00:50.659 Couldn't contain it. 0:00:50.699 --> 0:00:52.779 I was actually going to bypass straight past that, but 0:00:52.859 --> 0:00:53.459 thank you. Yes. 0:00:54.019 --> 0:00:57.739 I wore an all white outfit today and the second 0:00:57.739 --> 0:01:01.099 I walked in here, I had a mocker iced frape. 0:01:00.619 --> 0:01:05.179 So market, a massive frozen frapee. Great, yeah, delicious. 0:01:04.739 --> 0:01:08.459 Spilt it all down my top within thirty seconds. 0:01:08.619 --> 0:01:09.658 The worst parties I didn't know. 0:01:09.699 --> 0:01:11.459 I just kept talking to everyone like normal, and you're 0:01:11.459 --> 0:01:13.339 all laughing at me because I have coffee all down with. 0:01:13.419 --> 0:01:15.819 No one laughed. Everyone just looked at you, like kind 0:01:15.818 --> 0:01:16.258 of sad. 0:01:16.419 --> 0:01:19.178 Yeah, okay, we all looked at you like, Ah, that's so, 0:01:19.298 --> 0:01:20.099 that's miserable. 0:01:20.259 --> 0:01:22.179 I just turned my shirt around backwards. 0:01:22.259 --> 0:01:24.098 Well I think you were very resourceful, but that is 0:01:24.139 --> 0:01:25.059 not why you're excited. 0:01:25.139 --> 0:01:27.139 But thank you. We kind of took a tangent. 0:01:27.298 --> 0:01:29.499 Yeah, I just like, you know, this is our show, Laura. 0:01:29.658 --> 0:01:31.898 We can highlight the things that we want to highlight, 0:01:31.899 --> 0:01:33.538 and I just want to have like a proud fiance 0:01:33.699 --> 0:01:37.698 moment my fiance Ben this weekend. He lives over in Italy. 0:01:37.738 --> 0:01:39.499 He's a football player over there. He plays for a 0:01:39.499 --> 0:01:42.819 team called Genoa. But he's playing the biggest match of 0:01:42.818 --> 0:01:45.298 his career this Sunday night. 0:01:45.458 --> 0:01:47.538 So anyone that's listening that knows football. 0:01:47.819 --> 0:01:50.419 He's in Serie A, that's the league, which is like 0:01:50.899 --> 0:01:54.459 the Italian Premier League, I guess, and he's playing Napali, 0:01:54.579 --> 0:01:56.939 which is the number one team. They're about to win 0:01:57.019 --> 0:01:59.779 the championship. It's a stadium of like sixty or seventy 0:01:59.819 --> 0:02:03.579 thousand people. It's like a really huge deal and I'm 0:02:03.619 --> 0:02:05.859 just super excited and super proud of him. I'm going 0:02:05.899 --> 0:02:07.979 to get up at like three am so I can watch. 0:02:07.859 --> 0:02:08.459 Him from here. 0:02:08.859 --> 0:02:10.859 And these are the moments that is like, I'm so 0:02:10.979 --> 0:02:12.859 thrilled and so proud on one hand. 0:02:12.859 --> 0:02:13.859 On the other hand, I'm. 0:02:13.739 --> 0:02:15.499 Like, oh, these are the sad moments where you're like, 0:02:15.859 --> 0:02:18.418 I'm not there for his biggest moments. I don't get 0:02:18.418 --> 0:02:21.418 to actually see it. I get to like cheer alongside, 0:02:21.739 --> 0:02:22.819 you know, in the TV. 0:02:22.698 --> 0:02:23.458 With every TV. 0:02:23.698 --> 0:02:26.538 But also like, I hope he doesn't hear this. It's 0:02:26.579 --> 0:02:27.379 not expected that. 0:02:27.299 --> 0:02:30.179 They win, Like you know, when they're playing one of 0:02:30.179 --> 0:02:33.859 the best teams ever, it's like no one's expecting them 0:02:33.899 --> 0:02:36.059 to beat them. But on the off chance that he does, 0:02:36.779 --> 0:02:38.739 I won't be there. 0:02:38.779 --> 0:02:39.659 But it's it's cool. 0:02:39.698 --> 0:02:41.418 So I just I'm really thrilled for him, and I 0:02:41.538 --> 0:02:42.898 just wanted to like put it out there. 0:02:43.099 --> 0:02:48.858 Yeah, it is time for something we do every Thursday, 0:02:48.899 --> 0:02:51.418 and that is ask Guncut. It has become as staple 0:02:51.459 --> 0:02:53.379 of our podcast life on Cut, and it's. 0:02:53.299 --> 0:02:55.978 Where you guys call in with your deep, you're dark and. 0:02:55.899 --> 0:02:58.939 You're burning questions and even though we are completely unqualified, 0:02:58.978 --> 0:03:00.059 we do our best answer them. 0:03:00.459 --> 0:03:01.978 We have it Emily on the phone. 0:03:02.059 --> 0:03:04.259 Hey Emily, Hi Emily, what's the problem? 0:03:04.379 --> 0:03:09.299 Hi guys. Okay, So basically I was a guy I 0:03:09.499 --> 0:03:13.859 dated maybe like three or four years ago. We were 0:03:13.939 --> 0:03:18.419 quite serious, but like we never like were boyfriend and girlfriend, 0:03:19.099 --> 0:03:22.458 and due to like careers and stuff in the sense 0:03:22.499 --> 0:03:24.978 that like I work a normal job and he would 0:03:24.978 --> 0:03:30.339 work weird hours. It just never eventuated and my work 0:03:30.379 --> 0:03:34.659 took me other places. Anyways, I just have never been 0:03:34.698 --> 0:03:36.819 able to stop thinking about him. 0:03:37.059 --> 0:03:38.939 Like you think he's kind of the one that got away. 0:03:39.899 --> 0:03:42.339 Yeah, And the worst bit about it is I'm never 0:03:42.419 --> 0:03:44.819 one to like I'm such a girl's girl, right, Like 0:03:44.859 --> 0:03:48.339 I would never do anything. But he has a girlfriend 0:03:48.379 --> 0:03:52.259 now and they've been together for a year, and I 0:03:52.339 --> 0:03:54.539 thought it would just go away, but it's not. 0:03:55.059 --> 0:03:56.939 Have you dated other people and then it just doesn't 0:03:56.939 --> 0:03:59.419 feel right? Are you in a relationship now? Doesn't feel right? 0:04:00.419 --> 0:04:02.379 I have dated other people in the past, I have 0:04:02.459 --> 0:04:05.059 had a relationship in those three to four years, and yeah, 0:04:05.059 --> 0:04:06.339 I was still thinking about him. 0:04:06.659 --> 0:04:07.939 Do you have any contact with him? 0:04:10.179 --> 0:04:15.699 This is so bad. I swear, I swear such a 0:04:15.739 --> 0:04:17.699 girl's girl, like I would never move in on him, 0:04:17.859 --> 0:04:20.579 but we still chat. Yeah, here and there about like 0:04:21.059 --> 0:04:23.498 whatever's happening in the world, and like things I know 0:04:23.579 --> 0:04:24.219 he likes. 0:04:24.419 --> 0:04:26.499 Okay, so does he I know he likes? 0:04:27.059 --> 0:04:30.579 Does he ever give you the indication like does he 0:04:30.659 --> 0:04:32.459 ever overstep the mark or is he giving you the 0:04:32.499 --> 0:04:35.659 indication that like, had it been different, he would have 0:04:35.659 --> 0:04:36.579 wanted it to work out. 0:04:37.339 --> 0:04:42.419 So basically, back in October, we had like a drunk 0:04:42.539 --> 0:04:45.499 phone call and he was in a relationship at this time, 0:04:45.859 --> 0:04:47.819 and he said, oh, like we just didn't work out 0:04:47.819 --> 0:04:50.539 because our life past didn't go that way. And he 0:04:50.579 --> 0:04:54.699 still thinks of me nicely, but he tells his partner everything, 0:04:54.819 --> 0:04:57.779 and he's completely open with her and trusting with her. 0:04:57.859 --> 0:05:00.699 And I would never do anything to hurt a relationship 0:05:00.859 --> 0:05:03.739 or I wouldn't even like let him do something to 0:05:03.819 --> 0:05:06.259 affect that, because I know what that could mean if 0:05:06.299 --> 0:05:07.939 I were to get in a relationship with him and 0:05:07.939 --> 0:05:08.499 stuff like that. 0:05:08.659 --> 0:05:10.419 Emily, Yes, I do. 0:05:10.499 --> 0:05:12.859 But I also just think that sometimes the fantasy is 0:05:12.859 --> 0:05:14.739 better than the real life. Like I think that you 0:05:14.739 --> 0:05:16.259 can build it up in your head and be like, 0:05:16.539 --> 0:05:18.738 he's the one that's got away if we had another chance, 0:05:18.739 --> 0:05:20.059 maybe he's my person. 0:05:19.779 --> 0:05:21.499 But sometimes they do get away. 0:05:21.179 --> 0:05:22.419 But he's not your person. 0:05:22.579 --> 0:05:24.619 He's got a girlfriend, So if he wanted to be 0:05:24.659 --> 0:05:27.859 your person, he would free up. He's a calendar that 0:05:27.939 --> 0:05:30.859 he hasn't done that and he's definitely stayed committed in 0:05:30.899 --> 0:05:31.659 a relationship. 0:05:31.899 --> 0:05:33.419 I don't know. I kind of think. 0:05:33.659 --> 0:05:37.379 There isn't much that you can do, And I don't 0:05:37.619 --> 0:05:39.219 know if I would be putting myself in the firing 0:05:39.259 --> 0:05:40.739 line of telling him how I feel when he's in 0:05:40.779 --> 0:05:41.459 a relationship. 0:05:41.819 --> 0:05:43.299 But it doesn't agree with me, for it's looking at 0:05:43.339 --> 0:05:43.659 me like. 0:05:43.619 --> 0:05:47.899 She's nos, this doesn't happen. No, I'm not saying that 0:05:47.939 --> 0:05:48.699 doesn't happen often. 0:05:48.779 --> 0:05:51.939 I genuinely don't know what to tell you, because I 0:05:51.979 --> 0:05:54.779 am like a quite a romantic and I like the 0:05:54.859 --> 0:05:57.619 idea of like I do believe that there can be 0:05:57.739 --> 0:06:00.779 right people for each other at wrong times, like I 0:06:00.819 --> 0:06:01.939 know people wherever it's happened. 0:06:01.939 --> 0:06:02.739 I believe in that. 0:06:03.139 --> 0:06:06.779 I do believe in going after what she want, but 0:06:07.059 --> 0:06:09.819 obviously within reason. I don't mean that about like being 0:06:09.819 --> 0:06:13.419 a homewreck and breaking up relationships, but it's if you 0:06:13.659 --> 0:06:16.659 genuinely believe someone is the one that makes me be 0:06:16.779 --> 0:06:18.619 Like if he was in a relationship, I'd be like 0:06:18.659 --> 0:06:20.579 turn up to his house, like tell him. If he 0:06:20.619 --> 0:06:22.779 says he's not interested, it's fine, move on. At least 0:06:22.859 --> 0:06:24.219 you know that and you can put it to bed. 0:06:24.579 --> 0:06:26.459 This is what I think he do. It's wrong to 0:06:26.499 --> 0:06:28.219 try and break up a relationship, is wrong to do 0:06:28.259 --> 0:06:30.699 the wrong thing and emotionally cheat and cheat and things 0:06:30.699 --> 0:06:34.779 like that. You are well, I'm just saying she has 0:06:34.899 --> 0:06:36.979 not stopped thinking about him. She loves him, she thinks 0:06:36.979 --> 0:06:37.379 he's the one. 0:06:37.419 --> 0:06:38.779 This is what I would say, get a dog. 0:06:39.019 --> 0:06:42.019 No, I would say, hey, really, honestly, I don't think 0:06:42.019 --> 0:06:44.859 we can maintain this friendship anymore. I still have feelings 0:06:44.859 --> 0:06:46.939 for you, so I don't think it's right, and I'm 0:06:46.939 --> 0:06:48.939 going to do the right thing by your relationship and me. 0:06:49.059 --> 0:06:51.379 That way, you are being a good person and pulling back. 0:06:51.419 --> 0:06:53.659 As long as you commit to pulling back, you've also 0:06:53.939 --> 0:06:56.539 let him know why, which is like, my feelings are 0:06:56.579 --> 0:06:57.019 still there. 0:06:57.339 --> 0:06:58.859 Then he can go and do with it what he will. 0:06:58.859 --> 0:07:01.099 He'll either feel nothing for you and say like I 0:07:01.219 --> 0:07:04.259 understand and get on with your life, or he'll be like, wow, 0:07:04.299 --> 0:07:06.339 I've always felt the same way and didn't think she did, 0:07:06.379 --> 0:07:06.819 and then. 0:07:06.979 --> 0:07:08.019 Something will come Okay. 0:07:08.059 --> 0:07:11.179 The problem I have with it is that no matter 0:07:11.499 --> 0:07:13.419 what you do, even if you do throw that out 0:07:13.419 --> 0:07:15.099 there and he goes and turns around and says like, 0:07:15.139 --> 0:07:18.459 oh now I have confused feelings the amount of like 0:07:18.659 --> 0:07:20.459 back and forth, because no one's going to receive that 0:07:20.499 --> 0:07:23.059 information and then instantly go, you know what, I have 0:07:23.099 --> 0:07:24.059 those feelings for you too. 0:07:24.219 --> 0:07:25.059 I'm going to break up. 0:07:24.979 --> 0:07:27.259 With my girlfriend, move out of the house, and then 0:07:27.299 --> 0:07:29.339 we can start a consensual relationship together. 0:07:29.379 --> 0:07:30.899 I'm not gonna cheat. I'm going to be a stand 0:07:30.979 --> 0:07:31.299 up guy. 0:07:31.659 --> 0:07:35.499 There's nowhere in between except for it to either be 0:07:35.739 --> 0:07:38.019 he agrees, and then there's cheating for him to like 0:07:38.059 --> 0:07:39.979 get the validation that he needs in order to leave 0:07:39.979 --> 0:07:42.779 the relationship. He's not going to from a one line 0:07:42.819 --> 0:07:45.139 of you saying he's still got feelings, break up with 0:07:45.179 --> 0:07:46.899 his current girlfriend and move out of the house they 0:07:46.899 --> 0:07:50.179 live in. He's going to need way more validation, which 0:07:50.219 --> 0:07:54.459 just means you're putting yourself in a drama field unnecessary 0:07:55.139 --> 0:07:57.819 relationship with someone who has got a relationship and I 0:07:57.859 --> 0:07:59.179 just think you don't need this in your life. 0:07:59.179 --> 0:08:00.859 Well, she does need him in his life. He's teguin, 0:08:00.939 --> 0:08:01.739 he's her penguin. 0:08:01.819 --> 0:08:04.619 No, there's more than one person for everyone you meet 0:08:04.619 --> 0:08:05.899 someone else, Emily. 0:08:05.579 --> 0:08:07.499 What are you going to do? Whose advice you're taking? 0:08:07.579 --> 0:08:08.379 Laws of life? 0:08:09.019 --> 0:08:11.539 Part of me is steel, Like do I just suffer 0:08:11.579 --> 0:08:13.179 in silence. Just keep waiting. 0:08:13.979 --> 0:08:16.019 Don't keep waiting, Just don't wait. 0:08:16.099 --> 0:08:16.739 They don't wait. 0:08:16.979 --> 0:08:17.939 Emily date other. 0:08:17.859 --> 0:08:18.499 People I have? 0:08:18.819 --> 0:08:20.179 I have none of them. 0:08:20.899 --> 0:08:22.779 Oh, Emily, I do not envy you. 0:08:22.859 --> 0:08:24.659 Good luck with this, and make sure you us a 0:08:24.659 --> 0:08:26.059 call back and tell us how it all goes. 0:08:26.899 --> 0:08:28.059 I will, Thanks guys. 0:08:28.499 --> 0:08:29.339 Thanks Emily. 0:08:30.939 --> 0:08:33.259 Now I hate Laura that we even have to have 0:08:33.338 --> 0:08:37.059 these conversations. We are talking about something far more serious 0:08:37.059 --> 0:08:39.059 than we usually talk about on the pickup. But I 0:08:39.059 --> 0:08:41.259 think it is so important that people are across this, 0:08:41.699 --> 0:08:43.499 and I guess this is a bit of a PSA 0:08:43.659 --> 0:08:47.379 for anyone right now. The Australian Federal Police have just 0:08:47.419 --> 0:08:50.779 come out and issued a warning about the increase in 0:08:50.899 --> 0:08:54.419 drugs hitting our shore in Australia. They are colloquially known 0:08:54.459 --> 0:08:57.739 as fantasy, but otherwise known as a date rape drug. 0:08:57.819 --> 0:09:01.059 Now this year alone, more than three point eight tons 0:09:01.179 --> 0:09:03.779 of this drug, which we can call fantasy, have been 0:09:03.819 --> 0:09:08.219 seized so far. So three point eight tons seized. Imagine 0:09:08.219 --> 0:09:10.979 how you haven't been seized? Like, imagine how much is 0:09:11.019 --> 0:09:14.338 making it onto ashures. And we're seeing an increase in 0:09:14.939 --> 0:09:19.059 sexual assault cases from these date rape drugs and the 0:09:19.139 --> 0:09:22.019 reason I wanted to talk about this is because it 0:09:22.219 --> 0:09:23.699 personally has happened. 0:09:23.339 --> 0:09:24.419 To me three times. 0:09:24.539 --> 0:09:29.219 I have been drugged three times and by all different 0:09:29.299 --> 0:09:30.179 kinds of people. 0:09:30.459 --> 0:09:32.419 And this is what I think is important. 0:09:32.539 --> 0:09:35.699 A lot of people think in terms of this drug 0:09:35.859 --> 0:09:38.419 or this happening to them, this incident's happening to them, 0:09:38.419 --> 0:09:41.139 that it's usually by a stranger at a bar that 0:09:41.179 --> 0:09:43.859 slips something into your drink and that's it. You don't 0:09:43.859 --> 0:09:47.059 know them, and that does happen absolutely, but often this 0:09:47.139 --> 0:09:49.619 happens by people that you know as well, which is 0:09:49.699 --> 0:09:52.779 so sad to think about. But I want people to 0:09:52.819 --> 0:09:55.699 be super aware that it is not just a stranger 0:09:55.699 --> 0:09:57.179 in the bar when you're out that you have to 0:09:57.219 --> 0:09:59.099 be aware of. It's not just like making sure your 0:09:59.139 --> 0:10:01.859 hand is over your drink. It's being hyper aware of 0:10:01.939 --> 0:10:06.059 the increase that this is happening and also what to 0:10:06.059 --> 0:10:06.579 look out for. 0:10:07.299 --> 0:10:11.299 Yeah, I mean, firstly horrifying that like a federal warning 0:10:11.379 --> 0:10:13.739 has to be released in the first place, but we 0:10:13.739 --> 0:10:15.699 were just talking about it. I mean, the Pickup team 0:10:15.899 --> 0:10:18.179 is a one hundred percent female team. Like you know, 0:10:18.219 --> 0:10:20.299 there's four of us that work in this team, and 0:10:20.539 --> 0:10:23.659 of the four of us, three of us have experienced 0:10:24.099 --> 0:10:26.939 an incident where someone has used or tried to use 0:10:26.979 --> 0:10:30.659 one of these date drugs against us. You've been incredibly 0:10:30.739 --> 0:10:32.859 generous in sharing the things that have happened to you 0:10:32.899 --> 0:10:35.099 over the years, and how this has been something that 0:10:35.139 --> 0:10:37.259 hasn't just happened once, but it's happened three times to 0:10:37.299 --> 0:10:41.259 you my experience of it, I feel so lucky that 0:10:41.419 --> 0:10:43.299 I caught the person who was doing it in the 0:10:43.339 --> 0:10:47.779 midst of them making my drink. And this wasn't a stranger. 0:10:48.219 --> 0:10:50.179 I was at a friend's house. This was my ex 0:10:50.219 --> 0:10:52.939 boyfriend at the times best friend who I had lived with. 0:10:53.259 --> 0:10:55.419 I didn't even fully comprehend what it was that was 0:10:55.459 --> 0:10:58.659 going on until pretty shortly afterwards. I knew it was wrong, 0:10:58.739 --> 0:11:02.219 but I didn't actually realize his intention, if that makes sense. 0:11:02.299 --> 0:11:04.059 I didn't put two and two together because it was 0:11:04.059 --> 0:11:06.699 someone who I trusted so much, and I left and 0:11:06.739 --> 0:11:08.659 I felt so weird about the whole thing. And it 0:11:08.699 --> 0:11:11.499 wasn't until the next day, when I was completely sober, 0:11:11.819 --> 0:11:14.259 that I realized actually how close I came to something 0:11:14.299 --> 0:11:16.939 that could have been so much more horrendous. And I 0:11:16.979 --> 0:11:19.819 think for anyone, like if you have daughters, who are 0:11:19.819 --> 0:11:22.459 going out and they are you know, potentially mixing with 0:11:22.539 --> 0:11:25.459 new people. If this isn't something that you've thought about, 0:11:25.579 --> 0:11:28.779 it is just so crazily prevalent, and I hate that 0:11:28.819 --> 0:11:30.779 it has to be an issue and a warning for women. 0:11:30.899 --> 0:11:32.499 I know it does happen to men as well, and 0:11:32.779 --> 0:11:35.979 it can happen in same sex relationships, but the vast 0:11:36.019 --> 0:11:38.859 majority of sexual assaults that happened to women off the 0:11:38.859 --> 0:11:40.819 back of this, and the problem is is it's so 0:11:40.979 --> 0:11:44.299 underreported because when it does happen, you wake up not 0:11:44.459 --> 0:11:47.779 knowing what it is that you've just experienced. And so 0:11:48.419 --> 0:11:51.099 we really wanted to drive this message home because it's 0:11:51.139 --> 0:11:53.779 something that we all here care about so deeply, and 0:11:53.779 --> 0:11:55.579 if that can make someone a little bit more alert 0:11:55.619 --> 0:11:57.939 to it and save them from an experience that could 0:11:57.979 --> 0:12:00.779 be truly horrifying, then like it's, you know, an important 0:12:00.779 --> 0:12:01.499 conversation to have. 0:12:01.579 --> 0:12:02.339 Well, I want to take it a. 0:12:02.339 --> 0:12:04.179 Step further and tell you what it feels like and 0:12:04.219 --> 0:12:05.939 what's signed to look out for, so you know, if 0:12:05.939 --> 0:12:07.059 it's happening to you, and. 0:12:07.019 --> 0:12:08.059 I want to tell you what to do. 0:12:08.699 --> 0:12:11.379 So it has happened to me with someone from a 0:12:11.419 --> 0:12:13.979 bar like the barman it has happened with someone I 0:12:14.019 --> 0:12:16.779 was on a date with from like an online dating. 0:12:17.179 --> 0:12:19.099 I don't remember the site, but it was just online dating. 0:12:19.139 --> 0:12:20.659 We've been speaking for him for a week, met up 0:12:20.659 --> 0:12:22.459 with him. He did it on the first date. And 0:12:22.499 --> 0:12:23.899 it's happened with someone. 0:12:23.659 --> 0:12:24.179 That I knew. 0:12:25.179 --> 0:12:28.499 Now, I'm very lucky by the third time it happened, 0:12:28.539 --> 0:12:31.779 I say lucky. I'm unlucky, but I'm lucky that I 0:12:31.939 --> 0:12:35.019 was able to recognize what was happening to me because 0:12:35.019 --> 0:12:36.578 it had happened so many times, and. 0:12:36.579 --> 0:12:37.939 You could get out and get to safety. 0:12:38.059 --> 0:12:38.259 Well. 0:12:38.299 --> 0:12:39.819 A lot of people say, like, if you start to 0:12:39.859 --> 0:12:42.299 feel unwell, like make sure you get yourself to a hospital. 0:12:42.739 --> 0:12:45.299 In my experience, you do not have time. Like it 0:12:45.339 --> 0:12:49.019 happens so quickly, it is scary. It goes from zero 0:12:49.059 --> 0:12:53.458 to one hundred in sometimes potentially minutes. If you are out, 0:12:53.539 --> 0:12:56.179 you need to tell someone immediately that what is happening 0:12:56.219 --> 0:12:57.419 to you or what you think is happening to you, 0:12:57.419 --> 0:12:59.299 and get help. So if you are out at a bar, 0:12:59.379 --> 0:13:01.379 the second you don't feel right, you go to someone 0:13:01.379 --> 0:13:03.059 behind the bar, or you go to a friend or 0:13:03.099 --> 0:13:05.339 whoever it is, and you just tell them and one 0:13:05.419 --> 0:13:06.579 time I was with my sister. 0:13:07.219 --> 0:13:09.379 We were overseas and I straightway. 0:13:09.419 --> 0:13:11.859 That was the second time, so I was pretty sure 0:13:11.859 --> 0:13:14.739 something was happening, and I said to her, something's happening 0:13:14.739 --> 0:13:16.059 to me. I think I've been drugged. Win need to 0:13:16.059 --> 0:13:19.739 go now. And minutes later she was physically she's smaller 0:13:19.739 --> 0:13:22.299 than me. I was unconscious on the street. She was 0:13:22.339 --> 0:13:25.699 like dragging me into our hostel. If I hadn't had 0:13:25.979 --> 0:13:28.139 the recognition to know something was wrong and tell her, 0:13:28.219 --> 0:13:30.179 I don't know where I would be or what would 0:13:30.179 --> 0:13:32.659 have happened, but I just want you to recognize that 0:13:32.739 --> 0:13:34.899 it is for me, and I can only speak about 0:13:34.939 --> 0:13:37.779 my experiences, but they've all felt pretty the same. You 0:13:37.859 --> 0:13:40.219 feel very, very drunk, very quickly, but it's not a 0:13:40.219 --> 0:13:41.458 normal drunk, so you start. 0:13:41.579 --> 0:13:43.419 For me, the first sign was like when I would 0:13:43.419 --> 0:13:43.819 move my. 0:13:43.819 --> 0:13:46.899 Head to the side just to look, everything was taking 0:13:46.899 --> 0:13:50.619 too long to catch up, so my sight wasn't moving 0:13:50.659 --> 0:13:52.539 in line with my head, if that makes sense, and 0:13:52.579 --> 0:13:53.539 it started to get blurry. 0:13:53.579 --> 0:13:54.859 If your vision was blurred. 0:13:54.619 --> 0:13:56.899 Yep, And then that is literally You don't really have 0:13:56.979 --> 0:13:58.619 a lot of time to think of other signs and 0:13:58.659 --> 0:14:00.579 symptoms because it just starts to happen, you just start 0:14:00.579 --> 0:14:04.099 to feel really unwell and really really intoxicated. So the 0:14:04.219 --> 0:14:07.219 second you feel that, all I can say is just 0:14:07.299 --> 0:14:10.219 tell someone that you're weird what is happening, because it's 0:14:10.259 --> 0:14:12.539 only minutes away from you not being in control of 0:14:12.539 --> 0:14:13.099 your own body. 0:14:13.139 --> 0:14:14.979 And it's disgusting. 0:14:14.419 --> 0:14:16.259 That we are having these conversations and even the way 0:14:16.299 --> 0:14:18.499 I'm talking about it now, in my mind, I'm back 0:14:18.499 --> 0:14:20.419 in that situation trying to remember what it felt like, 0:14:20.459 --> 0:14:21.179 and it's horrific. 0:14:21.219 --> 0:14:23.499 It's truly truly horrific, and I don't want anyone to 0:14:23.539 --> 0:14:24.459 ever experience it. 0:14:24.739 --> 0:14:28.179 But I think it's important now that we know the 0:14:28.299 --> 0:14:30.339 level of drugs that are coming in and the level 0:14:30.339 --> 0:14:32.979 of people that are doing this for sexual assault, also 0:14:33.099 --> 0:14:35.339 for theft, like some people are just using it to 0:14:35.419 --> 0:14:38.219 rob people. I mean, that would be the best case scenario. 0:14:38.419 --> 0:14:40.939 But please, just like, talk to your daughters about it, 0:14:40.979 --> 0:14:42.579 talk to your sons about it, talk to your friends 0:14:42.619 --> 0:14:45.579 about it. Be hyper aware of what can happen, and 0:14:45.659 --> 0:14:48.419 make sure everyone knows what to do in that situation. 0:14:48.979 --> 0:14:50.699 Yeah, and look, if this news has affected you in 0:14:50.739 --> 0:14:53.139 any way, help is always available. And why don't have 0:14:53.259 --> 0:14:56.019 to respect or you can contact Lifeline twenty four seven 0:14:56.139 --> 0:14:59.939 on one three double one one four. Look, if you 0:14:59.939 --> 0:15:03.539 guys were listening to the show last week, you may 0:15:03.659 --> 0:15:07.539 have heard that we did our gender reveal live here 0:15:07.579 --> 0:15:09.339 on the pickup for baby be number three. 0:15:09.619 --> 0:15:11.139 Very exciting and. 0:15:11.259 --> 0:15:14.419 It is a we're having another girl. 0:15:14.179 --> 0:15:15.099 A girl. 0:15:15.259 --> 0:15:18.859 We're having three girls and look, I am so so thrilled. 0:15:18.899 --> 0:15:21.019 And I even said it on the show, like it's 0:15:21.059 --> 0:15:23.179 really funny when you already have two kids that are 0:15:23.179 --> 0:15:25.979 the same gender, because people instantly assume that the reason 0:15:26.019 --> 0:15:28.859 why you're going for number three is because you want 0:15:28.859 --> 0:15:31.499 to have a boy. And like, it got announced and 0:15:31.899 --> 0:15:34.299 we're all really excited, and we shared it on socials 0:15:34.299 --> 0:15:36.419 and I was reading through some of the comments and 0:15:36.459 --> 0:15:39.139 there's so many people who were like, well, maybe when 0:15:39.179 --> 0:15:40.819 you have number four, you'll get the boy. 0:15:40.859 --> 0:15:46.019 And it's a tricky one because there's no there's no more. 0:15:46.099 --> 0:15:49.979 And secondly, we didn't have number three because we wanted 0:15:49.979 --> 0:15:52.539 to have a boy. We had number three because of 0:15:52.579 --> 0:15:54.779 the experience of being parents and how much we love 0:15:54.939 --> 0:15:55.939 having kids. 0:15:56.179 --> 0:15:58.059 But gender was not a big factor. 0:15:58.539 --> 0:15:58.699 You know. 0:15:58.699 --> 0:16:00.339 We spoke about it a bit the other week, like 0:16:00.499 --> 0:16:02.339 it was probably a slightly bigger factor for Matt. 0:16:02.379 --> 0:16:04.339 I think he cared a bit more than what I did. 0:16:04.739 --> 0:16:07.899 He had this idea of potentially having a boy and 0:16:07.939 --> 0:16:09.739 doing all the things that you do with a boy, 0:16:09.819 --> 0:16:12.299 you know, going to the football and whatnot. And actually 0:16:12.339 --> 0:16:13.739 we were talking to Woody about it earlier in the 0:16:13.739 --> 0:16:16.019 week as well, and he had that similar feeling. But 0:16:16.099 --> 0:16:18.179 I can honestly say for me that I didn't care 0:16:18.219 --> 0:16:21.579 about the gender. But after the show, we were so 0:16:21.659 --> 0:16:23.659 excited to go home and talk to the girls because 0:16:23.739 --> 0:16:25.659 our little girls didn't know whether we were having a 0:16:25.659 --> 0:16:28.459 boy or a girl either. And it's really funny because 0:16:28.859 --> 0:16:32.619