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Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast. It's the podcast for the.

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Speaker 2: Time poor parent who just wants answers.

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Speaker 1: Now, Well, Kylie. Right around the nation at the moment,

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Speaker 1: we have parents of big kids, I'm talking year twelve

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Speaker 1: experiencing in many cases a whole lot of pressure because

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Speaker 1: year twelve exams are happening as we speak in several

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Speaker 1: states and are about to happen in several other states.

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Speaker 1: Really interesting time for parents. And next week we've decided

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Speaker 1: that we going to offer a little bit of guidance,

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Speaker 1: a little bit of help, a little bit of assistance.

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Speaker 1: We've got some incredible interviews lined up.

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Speaker 2: You're saying, we look, I'm actually part of this.

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Speaker 1: Well you I believe that.

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Speaker 2: I've been superseded next week.

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Speaker 1: You haven't been superseded. You've always said that you feel

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Speaker 1: like you don't know what to say in an interview,

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Speaker 1: and so you've asked me, You've asked not to do

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Speaker 1: the interviews.

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Speaker 2: So we I mean, you decided to have a week

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Speaker 2: of them, which means you're kicking me off the podcast.

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Speaker 1: Speak of all the time you'll have for homeschooling.

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Speaker 2: Yes, funny.

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Speaker 1: Can I give you a little taster of who we're

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Speaker 1: going to be chatting with go for it. Okay, so

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Speaker 1: we're going to be having a chat with a guy

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Speaker 1: by the name of Oh you know what. No, I'm

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Speaker 1: not going to tell you. I'm not going to tell you.

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Speaker 2: Are they all academics?

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Speaker 1: No? No, no, no, they're absolutely not. In fact, the

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Speaker 1: reason that we're having these conversations not all of them,

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Speaker 1: but several of them didn't even finish high school.

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Speaker 2: Are they all dat?

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Speaker 1: But they've gone on to live incredible lives. Okay, yeah,

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Speaker 1: gone on to live incredible lives. Not going to say

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Speaker 1: whether they're male or female. I'm not going to drop anything.

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Speaker 1: Some of them got into UNI and then dropped out

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Speaker 1: of UNI. Some of them didn't even finish high school.

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Speaker 1: Some of them finish high school and sort of just

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Speaker 1: got on with their lives. The conversation is going to

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Speaker 1: be so comforting for any parent who is raising kids

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Speaker 1: who are struggling with school number one, but number two,

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Speaker 1: these are also great people, and to hear their parenting story,

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Speaker 1: their parenting experiences, I think is going to be brilliant

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Speaker 1: as well. We're going to keep it really short, really focused,

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Speaker 1: but super super helpful. Oh. I will say this though,

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Speaker 1: at the end of the week, we're going to have

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Speaker 1: a chat with an academic sorry, there's the academic good

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Speaker 1: for you, who has been looking at the outcomes of

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Speaker 1: kids who do and don't finish high school. And we're

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Speaker 1: going to talk about why high school is important and

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Speaker 1: why it is important for kids to be there, even

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Speaker 1: though the rest of the week is about why school

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Speaker 1: isn't that important, because we've got to have the balance

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Speaker 1: and we've got to highlight that every child is different.

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Speaker 2: Now is four against one balance?

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Speaker 1: Well, we've got four anecdotes for great stories. But you'll

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Speaker 1: be surprised. You'll be surprised by what the people who

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Speaker 1: didn't finish school have to say about school. And there

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Speaker 1: is one absolute ripper in there that will just blow

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Speaker 1: you away and turn everything that you think about what

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Speaker 1: I've just said on its head. It's I mean, gosh,

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Speaker 1: this whole podcast could just be about how great next

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Speaker 1: week is going to be, but.

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Speaker 2: It's not going to be about that because Friday is

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Speaker 2: one of our favorite days.

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Speaker 1: Every Friday, it's all do better tomorrow. It's the day

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Speaker 1: where we reflect on how we can be more intentional

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Speaker 1: with our parents and try to be better. Why don't

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Speaker 1: you go first today.

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Speaker 2: A few weeks ago, we shared our big news that

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Speaker 2: we had decided to withdraw our kids from traditional schooling.

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Speaker 1: And when you said big news, I was thinking, hang on,

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Speaker 1: that we just became grandparents, or that I broke my

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Speaker 1: neck on my back, or that the kids are homeschooling,

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Speaker 1: and you've gone with the least exciting of all three.

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Speaker 1: But that's fine, that's fine.

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Speaker 2: Well, it is my learning from this eighties Okay.

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Speaker 1: I'm so sorry as you were, And.

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Speaker 2: So I thought I would just give everybody an update

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Speaker 2: on how our first few weeks of unschooling, because we

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Speaker 2: haven't started homeschooling where unschooling at the moment has gone.

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Speaker 1: I'm fascinated to hear what you've got to say about this,

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Speaker 1: because there hasn't. I'm not going to say anything. I'm

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Speaker 1: not going to make any judgments away, you go.

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Speaker 2: I'm just going to put the con out there, the

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Speaker 2: con straight away.

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Speaker 1: One big con.

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Speaker 2: The biggest challenge that I'm having right now is just

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Speaker 2: finding our rhythm. It's really really hard to find your rhythm.

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Speaker 1: Because you've kind of gone from having a life. And

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Speaker 1: I'm not saying that in a rude way, but like

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Speaker 1: you've had six hours every day where the kids have

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Speaker 1: been at school, where you've been able to do all

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Speaker 1: the things that run the house and run your life

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Speaker 1: and things that matter to you, and all of a

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Speaker 1: sudden you've lost that, And so now you're trying to

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Speaker 1: be with the children and give them the attention and

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Speaker 1: time and care that they need. But a whole lot

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Speaker 1: of those things then they're compulsory. It's not like they

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Speaker 1: were luxury items that you were You were living life,

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Speaker 1: had a full life.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, So that's that's probably my biggest struggle right now

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Speaker 2: is just wanting to be more available and present with

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Speaker 2: the kids. They're in my space all the time, but

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Speaker 2: actually wanting to be intentional about what we're doing together

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Speaker 2: and being constantly interrupted with the urgent of life. But

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Speaker 2: there is a whole list of pros that we're experiencing,

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Speaker 2: which I am just relishing and enjoying. So we've got

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Speaker 2: the con out of the way.

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Speaker 1: Yep. Great.

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Speaker 2: It is a challenge, and I'm not I'm not I'm

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Speaker 2: not denying that at all. But as we've started this process,

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Speaker 2: I have been overwhelmed at how many beauty to fall

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Speaker 2: things I'm recognizing and seeing and my kids that I

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Speaker 2: have not been there previously. The first one is just

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Speaker 2: this acknowledgement. I feel like I'm connecting with my kids

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Speaker 2: on a level that I have not previously been able

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Speaker 2: to do. I'm having conversations. These are actually, I'm going

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Speaker 2: to say, child initiated conversations, deep, heavy, important conversations that

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Speaker 2: they've been holding on to for so long because they

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Speaker 2: felt like our busy lifestyle didn't lend the space that

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Speaker 2: they needed to be able to share those things. And

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Speaker 2: so being able to have those conversations that have opened

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Speaker 2: my eyes up to the world of my children has

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Speaker 2: been mind blowing and I'm going to suggest life altering.

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Speaker 2: It has really created a connection with the children that,

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Speaker 2: like I said, we haven't previously had, but they have

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Speaker 2: felt heard and seen on a level that they haven't

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Speaker 2: experienced before.

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Speaker 1: I've seen it. I've watched it happening. Not that it's

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Speaker 1: been without its bumps, but I've watched it happening. And

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Speaker 1: there's been a softening in the kids and in their

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Speaker 1: relationship with us.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, that's been that's been magic. I have loved

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Speaker 2: watching how engaged our kids are in life. Again, there

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Speaker 2: is an engagement that we have, we have been begging

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Speaker 2: for with our children that has just felt all too

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Speaker 2: hard in their lives. And now that we've taken the

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Speaker 2: stress that school brought into their world, that has given

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Speaker 2: them again space to engage in the things that fill

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Speaker 2: their cup and light them up. And so it's I

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Speaker 2: actually wrote it's I'm seeing an engagement in life but books.

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Speaker 2: Our children love reading books, have had a great love

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Speaker 2: of books, but with the busy schedule that we've been

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Speaker 2: living for so long, they have engaged at different levels

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Speaker 2: at different times. And our thirteen year old came to

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Speaker 2: me the other day after just two weeks at home.

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Speaker 2: She's like, Mum, I've read four books in the last

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Speaker 2: two weeks. And that means that she's doing a lot

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Speaker 2: of reading at the moment. There is a lot of

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Speaker 2: downtime for her to do that, but she's lighting up.

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Speaker 2: She's excited again. She's wanting to find new things to

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Speaker 2: read and to discover, you know, what else is out there.

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Speaker 2: There's also been I want to say zero, but I

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Speaker 2: know it's not. But the sibling rivalry that we've experienced

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Speaker 2: in the past has almost all but vanished because.

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Speaker 1: It's just more emotionally balanced, right.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, And so whatever rivalry is happening between Miss

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Speaker 2: nine and Miss thirteen is so minuscule that it actually

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Speaker 2: does not enter the equation.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it doesn't read a stage, especially compared to how

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Speaker 1: it used to be.

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Speaker 2: We've taken the TV away, Yeah, and what a difference.

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Speaker 2: Ms Nin's really struggling with this. This is hard and

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Speaker 2: every day we're still asking, but we're getting through the

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Speaker 2: day without the TV. And that was probably one of

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Speaker 2: my biggest concerns leading into this. How do I not

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Speaker 2: have the TV on like all the time and we're

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Speaker 2: prepping food together. I know that sounds like really bizarre,

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Speaker 2: but I love that the kids are actually getting more

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Speaker 2: involved in the food prep and they're actually again have

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Speaker 2: the emotional space to try new foods that they didn't

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Speaker 2: have before because everything felt overwhelming to start with. And

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Speaker 2: now you're going to make me eat you know, a

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Speaker 2: carrot or whatever it happens to be. So while the

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Speaker 2: con is definitely big, finding a rhythm is hard. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and I am really struggling with that. These these pros,

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Speaker 2: these experiences that we're having together are just beautiful. And

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Speaker 2: to see the kids connecting and re connecting with themselves,

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Speaker 2: with us and with life again is magical, So you

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Speaker 2: know what I've got for it.

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Speaker 1: So it sounds like it's a big tick at the moment,

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Speaker 1: in spite of the challenges. Yeah, at the moment.

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Speaker 2: Look, we haven't got a curriculum added into the equation

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Speaker 2: and that will change the dynamics.

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Speaker 1: Again, I hadn't chat with the kids about that. I

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Speaker 1: was like, so, you know, there's going to be some

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Speaker 1: learning soon and they're like, oh. Although I did say

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Speaker 1: to our nine year old Emily, I said, I'm really

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Speaker 1: concerned that you're not going to be interested in listening

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Speaker 1: to us and being involved with learning once we really

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Speaker 1: start home school. And she looked at me and she said, Dad,

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Speaker 1: it'll be okay. I'm going to like my teachers. And

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Speaker 1: I'm like, who are you tick? Oh that's us. She's like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm very excited about it. Okay, So for my older

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Speaker 1: better tomorrow, I'm going to just share something that has

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Speaker 1: really really stood out to me in the last couple

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Speaker 1: of weeks. So I've caught a lot of aeroplanes lately.

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Speaker 1: I've been in Melbourne, I've been in Adelaide, and I've

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Speaker 1: been in Sydney. I've been all over the place for

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Speaker 1: the last few weeks traveling galore is Sydney a couple

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Speaker 1: of times in fact, and lately I've just been watching

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Speaker 1: a series while I jump on off planes rather than

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Speaker 1: working on the planes.

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Speaker 2: So you mean, while the kids and I have been

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Speaker 2: foregoing TV as part of an experiment to see how

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Speaker 2: screens affect us, you are watching screens.

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Speaker 1: The whole time you're saying this. I'm trying to think

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Speaker 1: of a really great comeback, a really great explanation. But

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Speaker 1: the answer is, yes, I have. I've got nothing.

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Speaker 2: You deleted, Disney.

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Speaker 1: I have no defense. I have no defense. Oh my goodness,

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Speaker 1: I didn't actually speechless. I just I don't know that

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Speaker 1: I can say what I was about to say because

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Speaker 1: I don't want the kids to hear what I was

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Speaker 1: about to say. All I'm going to say is this,

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Speaker 1: there's a series on one of the streaming platforms that

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Speaker 1: we have a subscription to about restaurant life. Restaurant life

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Speaker 1: that might explain a little bit to you about why

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Speaker 1: my behavior in the kitchen has been so focused lately.

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Speaker 2: Well, I did notice that your breakfast the other morning

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Speaker 2: was restaurant worthy.

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Speaker 1: It was, wasn't it?

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Speaker 2: It was? I've been really tasted delicious.

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Speaker 1: I made an on that was so good you had

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Speaker 1: to try it like I, and it was the best

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Speaker 1: on what I think I've ever made.

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Speaker 2: I'm really down to the presentation. You'd even drizzled your

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Speaker 2: best semch vinegar all around. I had a little bit

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Speaker 2: of rocket on the side.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. So this show, it's called The Bear, and I

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Speaker 1: need to just really quickly highlight every now and again

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Speaker 1: when we do reviews of stuff that we've seen. I

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Speaker 1: don't have any appetite at all for really course in

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Speaker 1: vulgar language. And it's been really hard to watch this

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Speaker 1: show because the family and the restaurant, there's an enormous

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Speaker 1: amount of dysfunction, and there is a lot of course

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Speaker 1: language and vulgarity in the program. But the show itself

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Speaker 1: is possibly one of the best shows I've ever seen

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Speaker 1: in my life ever. I mean, it is incredibly good.

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Speaker 1: Anyone who's watched The Bear would know what I'm talking about.

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Speaker 2: It's a food show.

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Speaker 1: No, it's not a food show. It's a proper drama.

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Speaker 1: It's not like there's nothing there that tells me how

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Speaker 1: to cook an omelet. I just watched them cook one,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, I can do that, and so

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Speaker 1: it's inspired me in the kitchen, but that's not what

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Speaker 1: my old A Bit of Tomorrow is about. It's not

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Speaker 1: about me cooking. And I'm trying to do this quickly.

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Speaker 1: I promised you i'd be fast, and you keep on

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Speaker 1: taking me on tangents, so let me quickly finish. There's

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Speaker 1: this really beautiful scene halfway through it.

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Speaker 2: We're still at the TV show.

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Speaker 1: Halfway through one of the episodes in season two, where

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Speaker 1: one of the most challenging characters in the whole show

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Speaker 1: has a massive change of heart when he goes through

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Speaker 1: a new work experience program. I'm just going to call

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Speaker 1: it that, so I don't give any spoilers to people

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Speaker 1: who haven't seen it yet. And as a result of that,

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Speaker 1: he has a really beautiful, in depth conversation with the

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Speaker 1: head chef in a restaurant. She begins to tell him

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Speaker 1: the story about the father that she had but never

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Speaker 1: had much of a relationship with until he died, and

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Speaker 1: she went through his journals and saw all the detail

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Speaker 1: that he made notes of in terms of the way

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Speaker 1: he lived his life, and there was one way that

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Speaker 1: he signed off every single journal entry. And just as

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Speaker 1: she's getting to the real crunch of the story and

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Speaker 1: that last line she gets interrupted and we never find

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Speaker 1: out what it was, except as this guy walks out

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Speaker 1: of the restaurant for the last time, he looks up

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Speaker 1: to where the clock is and there's a plaque underneath

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Speaker 1: the clock, and it just says, every second counts. That's

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Speaker 1: a theme that seems to be perpetually running through both

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Speaker 1: series of this show, The Bear that every second counts,

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Speaker 1: And the whole time I've been watching it, I've been

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Speaker 1: so swept up in the drama and so caught up

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Speaker 1: in the fascination that I have with the incredible work

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Speaker 1: that people do when they work in kitchens and prepare incredible,

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Speaker 1: beautifully plated meals for us to enjoy. I've just accepted

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Speaker 1: that in the kitchen, every second count. You want to

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Speaker 1: make sure that you've got great food and it's ready,

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Speaker 1: and it's played and it's presented, and it's served up

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Speaker 1: nice and hot, and everybody's working hard and every second counts.

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Speaker 1: But once I got that additional context from this headschef

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Speaker 1: sharing the story about her dad, it stopped me in

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Speaker 1: my tracks. I put the iPad away while I was

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Speaker 1: on the plane, and I stayed out the window and

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Speaker 1: I thought, Oh my goodness, this is the lesson of life.

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Speaker 1: This is not a kitchen lesson, this is a life lesson.

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Speaker 1: Every second counts. We've got to make the most of

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Speaker 1: every moment. We've got to stop staring at our screens

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Speaker 1: and I don't know, just fiddling our thumb, twiddling our thumbs,

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Speaker 1: fiddling our thumbs, fiddling with our thumbs, twddling our thumbs,

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Speaker 1: whatever it is, and make the most of every moment.

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Speaker 1: Every moment counts. Every moment has the potential the powerful magic.

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Speaker 1: And I've come home from my last trip and I'm

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Speaker 1: just so committed to making every second count with the kids.

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Speaker 1: So I got home and I had some work to do,

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Speaker 1: but I made sure that there was story time with

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Speaker 1: the kids, and I made sure that there was hugs

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Speaker 1: with the kids. And because we're so fortunate to live

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Speaker 1: on the Sunshine Coast, one morning, I just said, hey, kids,

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Speaker 1: let's jump in the car and ice and early, and

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Speaker 1: we're going to go to Noosa and walk on the

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Speaker 1: beach and go for a swim in the water while

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Speaker 1: the sun comes up. Making the most of every moment.

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Speaker 1: You don't have to live on the coast to do

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Speaker 1: that though, like you can go for a walk in

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Speaker 1: the park, or you can sit on the front porch,

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Speaker 1: or you can breathe in your living room and just

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Speaker 1: soaking up that time together. For me, that's my older

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Speaker 1: better tomorrow because there's been so much going on with

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Speaker 1: becoming grandparents and with the whole homeschool thing that we've

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Speaker 1: taken on with the two youngest kids, and with me

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Speaker 1: breaking my back and my neck and still having to

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Speaker 1: travel and work, and I've got a book that I'm

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Speaker 1: trying to write, and all this stuff is sort of

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Speaker 1: building up and building up and building up, and it's

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Speaker 1: the pressure and we've got to get that plate served up.

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Speaker 1: To use the restaurant metaphor a little bit further, but

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Speaker 1: every second counts, and for me, my older better tomorrow

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Speaker 1: is I don't want to spend one second on Facebook

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Speaker 1: or social media doing anything that takes me away from

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Speaker 1: the stuff that matters most. What can I do to

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Speaker 1: make most of the moments. So that's my older better tomorrow.

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Speaker 1: Tell me that that was inspiring, Tell me that that

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Speaker 1: really just got you going.

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Speaker 2: Well, I'm looking forward to an omelink tomorrow morning.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, omelet coming up just for you and that would

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Speaker 1: have been way faster, except you kept on asking me

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Speaker 1: all those questions about the TV show and it was

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Speaker 1: not about the TV show. Have a great weekend everyone.

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Speaker 1: We're so grateful you choose to listen to the Happy

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Speaker 1: Families Podcast. We hope that it inspires you to greatness

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Speaker 1: in your home. Make every moment count. The Happy Families

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Speaker 1: Podcast is produced by Justin Roland from Bridge Media. Craig

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Speaker 1: Bruce is our executive producer, and for more about making

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Speaker 1: your family happier, visit us at happy families dot com

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Speaker 1: dot a