WEBVTT - Sorry, But I'm Not Participating In Your Office 'Fun' Day 🤡

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<v Speaker 1>Flex and Frooms, Flex and Frooms. This is the Flex

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<v Speaker 1>and Frooms catch up podcast. Am I am I, Am

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<v Speaker 1>I the Asshole. It is fun to lament work. Lament yeah, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>to complain about work, to really really feel glum about

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<v Speaker 1>the working environment. We condone it. But if you own

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<v Speaker 1>your own business, don't feel sad when your employees also

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<v Speaker 1>hate working for you. It's just the nature of work.

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<v Speaker 1>It's terrible. Here's anwy the Asshole from a listener of ours.

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<v Speaker 1>They want to know if they're in the wrong for

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<v Speaker 1>not wanting to participate in office fun days off the dome.

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<v Speaker 1>They're in the right, but to do the am I

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<v Speaker 1>the Assholes service, Let's read the whole thing. They say.

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<v Speaker 1>They work for a company that values team cohesion, and

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<v Speaker 1>every year a mandatory fun day is organized where attendance

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<v Speaker 1>is seemingly compulsory. It's a class corporate team building bullsh icebreak.

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<v Speaker 1>Because of the people I've known for years falling over

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<v Speaker 1>and being caught that sort of crap. This is perfect

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<v Speaker 1>God trust for baby. The event was announced with less

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<v Speaker 1>than a week's notice, and my manager Greg emphasized its importance,

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<v Speaker 1>insinuating it would impact our performance evaluations. That's a threat.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't really understand this, but not at a long mood.

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<v Speaker 1>I was frustrated and felt coerced as I have a

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<v Speaker 1>bunch of ongoing projects and pressing deadlines. So I expressed

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<v Speaker 1>my concerns to Greg, explaining the inconvenience and the impact

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<v Speaker 1>it would have in my workload. He was dismissive of

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<v Speaker 1>my concerns, asserting that the event was crucial for team

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<v Speaker 1>building and that missing one day of work wouldn't help,

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<v Speaker 1>wouldn't hurt. Sorry. I agreed to attend. The day before,

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<v Speaker 1>I was stuck working late and ended up deciding I'm

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<v Speaker 1>not going to the team building event. That evening I pinged, pinged,

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<v Speaker 1>you're in deep, babe. That evening, I pinged a colleague

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<v Speaker 1>i'm friends with, saying as much. I slept until nine am.

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<v Speaker 1>The next day worked from home. It was pretty productive

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<v Speaker 1>all things considered. This wound Greg up. The next day.

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<v Speaker 1>He confronted me, accused me of being uncooperative antisocial. Fine,

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<v Speaker 1>but I don't see why I need to socialize with

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<v Speaker 1>my colleagues, especially when it feels so forced. He was

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<v Speaker 1>very aggressive, basically shouting at me in the office in

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<v Speaker 1>front of the whole team, so I'd be happy to

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<v Speaker 1>come to more reasonable social stuff, but I won't be

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<v Speaker 1>going to team building days since they're a waste of time.

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<v Speaker 1>It'd be easier and nice for us to get lunch

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<v Speaker 1>somewhere instead. Yes, after all of this, Greg effectively punish

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<v Speaker 1>me by telling me I'd be getting coffees for the

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<v Speaker 1>entire team. People just do this for themselves normally for

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<v Speaker 1>the next week. I'm a mid thirties senior software engineer,

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<v Speaker 1>not some intern, so this is pretty embarrassing for me.

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<v Speaker 1>I get that I shouldn't have decided I wasn't going

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<v Speaker 1>to go last minute, but the day is a complete

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<v Speaker 1>waste of time, and going would have meant I'd be

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<v Speaker 1>working Saturday most likely. I also think that Greg is

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<v Speaker 1>trying to embarrass me with coffee duty, which doesn't sit

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<v Speaker 1>right with me. So Flex and Frims please tell me

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<v Speaker 1>am I the asshole.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, I'm just gonna kick it off straight off the bat.

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<v Speaker 2>This is the modern day adult equivalent of having to

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<v Speaker 2>do this swim carnival. Nobody enjoys the swim carnival. If

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<v Speaker 2>I have to tell you that I've got my pizzo

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<v Speaker 2>d on the clock, just to not go to your

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<v Speaker 2>stupid your stupid activity. Also, unless it's go karting or

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<v Speaker 2>laser tag, I'm gonna play laser tag and kill buy

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<v Speaker 2>of me. Never never choose violence, y'all. But like, if

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<v Speaker 2>I have a chance to shoot someone with a laser

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<v Speaker 2>tager afterwards, then I'm gonna laser tag. But if I

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<v Speaker 2>if you're accosting me with deadlines that you know I

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<v Speaker 2>can't hit, and then you're saying let's do a little

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<v Speaker 2>half day soccer tournament, honestly shut up.

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<v Speaker 1>Unfortunately, here is the frustrating thing about working environments. People

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<v Speaker 1>have to work to live, So no matter how enjoyable

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<v Speaker 1>you think you're making working, it's in hinging and infringing

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<v Speaker 1>on their rights as people. Yes, like, no matter which

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<v Speaker 1>way you want to spin it, we'll give you extra snacks,

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<v Speaker 1>will make it fun. It always feels like a burden

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<v Speaker 1>because fundamentally people shouldn't have to work to live. But

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<v Speaker 1>here we are also the irony in your employers forcing

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<v Speaker 1>you to do something under the guys, but being for

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<v Speaker 1>your own personal benefit. When you were explaining all the

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<v Speaker 1>ways it's not beneficial to you, popes, sus. We have

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<v Speaker 1>ranted about hr before. We won't be doing it again.

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<v Speaker 2>There were some ten poles in the lift.

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<v Speaker 1>When I say we it was rooms, I was nodding

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<v Speaker 1>along silently.

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<v Speaker 2>It did very well on the socials.

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<v Speaker 1>And you ate if you are someone who is older

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<v Speaker 1>than high school age, still living in your parents' house

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<v Speaker 1>and you don't want to follow their rules, so that

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<v Speaker 1>I would say their house, their rules, because I understand

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<v Speaker 1>if you don't want to abide by their rules, you

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<v Speaker 1>need to leave. Similar to working environments, for the most part,

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<v Speaker 1>when you sign a contract, you got to abide by

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<v Speaker 1>the rules of the workplace. But the difficulty about that

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<v Speaker 1>is the rules get changed constantly for no reason. Things

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<v Speaker 1>that are supposed to be mandatory, like your one hour

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<v Speaker 1>lunch breaks or getting like having staplers and office stationary

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<v Speaker 1>and things that getting overtime, getting over time, getting your

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<v Speaker 1>time and lou things that are there to make sure

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<v Speaker 1>you can do your job well get like confused in

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<v Speaker 1>the frame. So I can understand that fundamentally, there's a

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<v Speaker 1>confusion between what you have to do and what it's

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<v Speaker 1>implied you should do for the benefit of your job.

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<v Speaker 1>That's the confusing bit because there's so much that people

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<v Speaker 1>do in their jobs they don't have to do, but

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<v Speaker 1>it's implied that it'd make their working life easier. To that,

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<v Speaker 1>you ask, who is going to make your life harder

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<v Speaker 1>if you don't do it? There's like an implied threat. So,

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<v Speaker 1>for example, let's say your boss says, I know you

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<v Speaker 1>start at nine o'clock, you work nine to five, but

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<v Speaker 1>we notice when you get at nine o'clock you're shuffling around,

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<v Speaker 1>you're not getting ready, getting a coffee, and by the

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<v Speaker 1>time you're really sitting down it's nine thirty. So to

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<v Speaker 1>make sure that you're not cutting into your worktime, come

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<v Speaker 1>at eight thirty. I've been here with that before, have you. Yeah? Damn.

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<v Speaker 1>So imagine you don't start work at eight thirty. You

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<v Speaker 1>start at night. So now if your boss is implying

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<v Speaker 1>that you should come at eight thirty because from their perspective,

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<v Speaker 1>it would make you do your job better, what if

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<v Speaker 1>you just didn't do that, who's in the wrong. Not

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<v Speaker 1>quite sure. Also, the confusing thing is we have contracts

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<v Speaker 1>to ensure that you do what's on your contract. Things

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<v Speaker 1>like maybe come at eight thirty, maybe go to the

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<v Speaker 1>office fun day. They're not in the contract. So do

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<v Speaker 1>we have to do it. The other thing, the thing

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<v Speaker 1>that I told you the story before about when I

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<v Speaker 1>had that performance review at my job and I didn't

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<v Speaker 1>drink either, and all they did. We worked in prs,

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<v Speaker 1>so it was like every day, let's go get pissed

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<v Speaker 1>for seven hours. I don't want to do that. And

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<v Speaker 1>so my boss at the time was like, but it's

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<v Speaker 1>really bad from morale because the girl you see you

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<v Speaker 1>out and about, you know, in your own time, having

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<v Speaker 1>a good time, and they just feel like they don't

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<v Speaker 1>get that side of you. And like, yeah, because we're employees,

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<v Speaker 1>we're coworkers, and what they're observing is finding their way

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<v Speaker 1>onto my Instagram that I didn't share with them to

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<v Speaker 1>observe my life. Like I'm also getting fomo, you were

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<v Speaker 1>meant to see that that was never gonna be you.

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<v Speaker 1>But when she said to me, oh, you should consider

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<v Speaker 1>going to these office fundays because it'll improve morale, I'm like,

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<v Speaker 1>that's your job. If morale is funny, I'm sorry, boss, Like,

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<v Speaker 1>that's on you. So I'm gonna need you to start

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<v Speaker 1>stock in the kitchen extra things or bit of teaching

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<v Speaker 1>bags play how to make the work environment better so

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<v Speaker 1>your employees don't have to overcompensate with overtime to reverse

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<v Speaker 1>the damage of poor management. Do you know what I'm saying?

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<v Speaker 2>Yes?

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<v Speaker 1>And so also in this instance, Greg the in the listener,

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<v Speaker 1>DM Greg is now out for you, which is an

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<v Speaker 1>actual tangent touch in your back, you know. So you know,

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<v Speaker 1>maybe you have saved five hours by not going to

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<v Speaker 1>the office Funday, but now you've got a superior on

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<v Speaker 1>your back, to which I say, how much power do

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<v Speaker 1>you actually have to wield? Honestly, I feel for you.

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<v Speaker 1>You're saying like you're seeing your management mid thirties. We

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<v Speaker 1>don't want to be embarrassed with coffee runs, but you're

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<v Speaker 1>actually doing them now, So it seems as though you've

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<v Speaker 1>got yourself in a funny place, not the asshole. But

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<v Speaker 1>I hate what my mum used to say to me,

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<v Speaker 1>like what's the better outcome like doing something you don't

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<v Speaker 1>want to do and things being fine, or just doing

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<v Speaker 1>what someone's telling you do and you being annoyed? In

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<v Speaker 1>some instances, you being annoyed is not worth it. Usually

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<v Speaker 1>when you have power and dynamic, when you can be

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<v Speaker 1>annoyed and know that you've got in your way, But

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<v Speaker 1>being annoyed and not getting your way and still working.

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<v Speaker 1>Not fun choice words. You've been listening to The Flex

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<v Speaker 1>and Froom's daily podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>For more, Tune Indicator on DAB or stream it on iHeartRadio.