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Speaker 1: Christian.

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Speaker 2: Hey, hello, Christian O'Connell Show podcast Claxon. You know what

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Speaker 2: I mean is when you hear the clackson on the show,

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Speaker 2: it means it's who's calling Christian. So second time of

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Speaker 2: doing Who's Calling Christian? Down under an amazing run of

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Speaker 2: celebrities that you've got to call the show from all

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Speaker 2: over the world. It will be back again, but for now,

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Speaker 2: here's what happened this year twenty twenty. In an extraordinary year,

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Speaker 2: you still might actually get people from all over the

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Speaker 2: world to call the show. Thank you very much. Got

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Speaker 2: the best listeners in the world. It's great fun doing this.

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Speaker 2: I look forward to doing it in twenty twenty one

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Speaker 2: with you guys as well. Who's Calling Christian? Play the clackson?

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Speaker 2: Thank you? And we had a call this morning from

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Speaker 2: Bill Bailey, who doesn't love Bill Bailey. Christian O'Connor, Christian, Bill,

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Speaker 2: how are you mate? I haven't spoken to you or

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Speaker 2: seen you for ages, I know very well.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, just about you know, bearing up in these

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Speaker 1: strange times when in Australia, Well I was doing to

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Speaker 1: be in Australia right now about just starting my tour.

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Speaker 1: So that's just you know, postponed indefinitely to when doing.

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Speaker 2: A show now over the phone, I can just go

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Speaker 2: and grab a coffee for the next hour and you

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Speaker 2: just do the show down the phone phone. It in

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Speaker 2: literally it's just nice.

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Speaker 1: Talking to someone Christian, It's really nice talking to anyone,

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Speaker 1: anyone at all that isn't my own immediate family.

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Speaker 3: The lights.

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Speaker 2: Are you missing? Are you missing doing live? You must

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Speaker 2: be missing it?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean the thing is, this is what we do.

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Speaker 1: If you know comics, you know, we live for that,

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Speaker 1: the live experience. And I've done a few zoom gigs,

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Speaker 1: but it's just not the same.

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Speaker 2: How do you do what you do over zoom? I

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Speaker 2: mean exactly.

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Speaker 1: It was a little bit of a challenge. Yes, of course,

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Speaker 1: you know you can't really see much in an iPhone camera.

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Speaker 2: And have you still got the job? Parrots? Have they

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Speaker 2: gone now?

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Speaker 1: Yes? We got the giant parrots. Yes, yes, lots of

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Speaker 1: rescue dogs, rescue animals, go everything right now.

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Speaker 2: Thinking that Bill Bailey owns an.

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Speaker 1: Art somebody came to the door with a peacock once

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Speaker 1: they go and they said can you look after that?

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Speaker 1: And I went no, and I said where'd you get it?

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Speaker 1: And he just read, oh, I found it. I just

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Speaker 1: found it. I found it in the street. No you didn't.

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Speaker 1: You've nicked it.

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Speaker 2: Everyone and give us this call leaves us a question.

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Speaker 2: So did you ever see the Crazy Australian Kids TV

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Speaker 2: showing the nineties Round the Twist?

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Speaker 1: Yes, I do remember that, Yes, all right.

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Speaker 2: But the your question comes from one of the actresses

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Speaker 2: that used to be in the nineties called Joline. She

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Speaker 2: was Linda number two in it. This is her question

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Speaker 2: for you, Bill Bailey.

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Speaker 3: What is the most embarrassing childhood memory? Oh?

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Speaker 1: Okay, yes, I used to play a lot of pranks

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Speaker 1: on people when I was a kid. I had this

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Speaker 1: little rubber sucker that you put underneath a cup and

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Speaker 1: you could stick a cup to a saucer and it

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Speaker 1: would stick like glue to this saucer. Anyway, there was

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Speaker 1: a funeral, right and my aunt Auntie Elsie, died, so

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Speaker 1: there was a big wake at the house and everyone

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Speaker 1: came back to the house and there was like cups

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Speaker 1: of tea going around and all this, and I suddenly realized,

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Speaker 1: to my horror that one of these cups had this

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Speaker 1: rubber sucker in the part of it. And I think

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Speaker 1: it was a sister a younger sisters. He was being comforted.

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Speaker 1: Oh don't worry, dear. So she was trying to get

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Speaker 1: the cup from the saucer and it wouldn't come, and

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Speaker 1: eventually it came, and the tea went all over. And

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Speaker 1: then while I was in so much trouble, Oh god,

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Speaker 1: I was, I was in terrible trouble. Oh yeah, pranks,

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Speaker 1: playing terrible pranks on trenchless old lady at wakes?

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Speaker 2: What is the question from you, Bill, for the next

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Speaker 2: person that gives us a call on this?

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Speaker 1: Okay, if you suddenly found out that your dog could speak, right,

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Speaker 1: what would be the first question you'd ask it?

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Speaker 2: What words you ask your dog if it could speak?

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Speaker 2: What would be the first question?

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Speaker 4: Really?

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Speaker 1: The tummy rubbs, just tell me about that.

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Speaker 2: Bill who asked you? And give us a call. How

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Speaker 2: did you hear about this?

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Speaker 1: A lady called Rebecca Rose.

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Speaker 2: Brilliant And there's there a charity you're supporting, mate.

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Speaker 1: You know what I really feel for all the sort

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Speaker 1: of backstage people or the touring cruise, the stage crews

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Speaker 1: for whom there is no work. You know, our live

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Speaker 1: industry is just sort of ground to a halt. So

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Speaker 1: there's a lovely charity in Australia. It's an Australian charity

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Speaker 1: called Crewe Care To voluntary organization and there's a sort

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Speaker 1: of they deal with people who are going to strive

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Speaker 1: for mental health issues or are in some financial difficulties.

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Speaker 1: It's called crewcare dot Org.

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Speaker 2: Right, Bill, we got to go. Thank you so much,

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Speaker 2: give us a call. Okay, all right, Bill, take care mate.

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Speaker 2: Thanks buddy, Christian Christian O'Connell show podcast.

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Speaker 3: Christian'.

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Speaker 2: Who's calling? Christian? Who's this?

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Speaker 1: Hello?

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Speaker 4: It's your old friend Ricky Gervais.

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Speaker 2: You sounds so happy that he speaking to me.

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Speaker 4: Well, it's like I don't know. Twitter to me is

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Speaker 4: like a nest of baby birds. Every time I go

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Speaker 4: on there's people with their beaks open asking me to

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Speaker 4: do stuff. It's like unbelievable. It's life changes and I ah,

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Speaker 4: So some bloke I've never heard of just got on

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Speaker 4: to me and gave me the number. And so, I mean,

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Speaker 4: it's lovely to speak to you.

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Speaker 2: So what is it? Is it? It's Monday night? Are

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Speaker 2: you in the UK?

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Speaker 4: Is that?

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Speaker 2: What are you calling from?

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Speaker 4: Tuesday night?

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Speaker 1: And what day is it?

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Speaker 2: Are what day? Depp? These days? Aren't you you and

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Speaker 2: your wine.

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Speaker 4: I've had a little drink. I'm just about to go

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Speaker 4: to bed. I've watched the UFC fight. I was about

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Speaker 4: to watch another episode of Curb, which I've completed again.

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Speaker 2: I did not know you were a UFC fan. I

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Speaker 2: did not.

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Speaker 4: I love you. See, I used to watch it when

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Speaker 4: I was disgusted with myself for watching it. When it

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Speaker 4: was like just two just two board blows in a

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Speaker 4: cage beating each other up. Before it became like a

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Speaker 4: sophisticated spot.

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Speaker 2: It used to be used to be really fat guys

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Speaker 2: would like guts, look like they just got them out there.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it's just like they could have. They'd have been

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Speaker 4: just as happy with two bricks in a skip in

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Speaker 4: a car park. It's probably my favorite sport now.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so you right there, we're running out of TV shows.

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Speaker 2: You need to have you written After Life three? Yet?

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Speaker 2: Is that Is that all done?

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Speaker 3: All?

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Speaker 1: I've got the first draft?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but you know that I've still got six months.

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Speaker 4: I'm ahead of the game because you're not filming that

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Speaker 4: till next April. If it happens, if there's still it's

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Speaker 4: still a world. But I'm assuming, I'm assuming there it's

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Speaker 4: gonna it's still be you don't know. Yah, But it

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Speaker 4: is a world of streams, isn't it. There's people who

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Speaker 4: say that, you know, it's the end of the world

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Speaker 4: next Tuesday, and then others who say, no, you can't

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Speaker 4: catch anything ever, just go and suck a doorknob. It's fine,

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Speaker 4: it's a conspiracy, just go. So it's fine.

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Speaker 1: Go.

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Speaker 2: I think that isn't that? Boris Johnson's new policy at

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Speaker 2: the moment is to encourage the country to suck a dornob.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, that's a great that is a great campaign. It's

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Speaker 4: like we've had claps for the NHS. Now it's sucker doorknob.

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Speaker 4: They dig for victory.

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Speaker 2: Or he's in fine form, he's had a cup of

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Speaker 2: drinky poos. We'll be back with Ricky Gervais.

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Speaker 4: Christian O'Connell show.

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Speaker 2: Let's go back to our chat with Ricky Jervase when

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Speaker 2: I asked him this morning, what is he doing to

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Speaker 2: survive in lockdown? Because you want to be doing like

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Speaker 2: your world tour at the moment you stand up tour.

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Speaker 4: Well, that's the I mean, that's the only thing that's

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Speaker 4: made difference for me. If it wasn't for that, this

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Speaker 4: would have been like you know, a long summer holiday.

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Speaker 4: I mean, my gig's gonna be the last to come back.

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Speaker 4: You know, it's like six people now allowed at a

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Speaker 4: children's party, and I'm playing thirteen thousand sold out in Copenhagen.

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Speaker 4: I've got no chance. I say, most of the year

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Speaker 4: has been writing anyway.

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Speaker 2: So that and you're happy with with After Life three.

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Speaker 2: I know it's only the first draft, but you're happy

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Speaker 2: with it because of the second season.

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Speaker 4: I am because I've told myself it's the last series.

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Speaker 4: That's always a relief and you can put all your

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Speaker 4: eggs into one basket and really make it special.

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Speaker 2: So are you supporting a charity, Ricky? I know you

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Speaker 2: do loads for various animal charities. Is the one that

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Speaker 2: you're supporting? Were you give us a call.

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Speaker 4: I'd say All Dogs Matter. It's a small charity in

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Speaker 4: London and they you know, they get straight dogs and

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Speaker 4: they rehome them. So I think All Dogs Matter would

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Speaker 4: be my choice.

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Speaker 2: Yesterday Bill Bailey called us actually from London for this,

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Speaker 2: and he's a dog. Now. Bill's question was if your

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Speaker 2: dog could suddenly talk, what the first question you would

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Speaker 2: ask a dog?

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Speaker 4: Do you really love me?

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Speaker 1: Or is it just food?

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Speaker 2: I think all of us dog owners secretly fear.

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Speaker 4: Do you really love me as much as you seem

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Speaker 4: to or is it just the treat?

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Speaker 2: Have we been sold alive with this man's best friend BS?

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Speaker 2: It's just a snacks. Yeah, Ricky, we've got another question

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Speaker 2: for you. The last person who gave us a call?

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Speaker 2: Did you watch night Rider as a kid in the eighties?

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Speaker 1: I did.

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Speaker 4: I was aware of it, but the only person I

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Speaker 4: remember being obsessed with it was Ian Camfield. Yes, yes, yeah,

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Speaker 4: it was it was he loved that and the eighteen.

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Speaker 2: We've got a question for that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: The last person gave us a call. The last person

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Speaker 2: give us calls Rebecca Holden. She was in night Rider

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Speaker 2: in the eighties. And here's a question for you.

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Speaker 1: What is your very very favorite television show from the eighties?

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Speaker 2: What's your favorite show from the eighties? Rocky?

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Speaker 4: Oh god, now I can only think of the A Team.

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Speaker 2: What it's a great show.

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Speaker 3: Then, Yeah, I did, I.

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Speaker 4: Did like it. I can't remember if I liked it

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Speaker 4: ironically or pretending he hadn't.

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Speaker 2: Been invented in the eighties. Ricky, that's that's that's only

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Speaker 2: the last sort of fifteen twenty, is it?

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Speaker 3: It?

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Speaker 2: Wasn't there in the eighties. If you like something, you

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Speaker 2: liked it properly. It wasn't in italics.

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Speaker 4: I remember teasing Ian Camfield about why it was so good,

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Speaker 4: and I said, I don't know. I said, how can

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Speaker 4: it that the FBI are after him?

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Speaker 1: Right?

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Speaker 4: No one can find them. But why can a poor

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Speaker 4: old woman who's been kicked out of her apartment find

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Speaker 4: Hannibal when she needs it? Because sometimes he would disguise

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Speaker 4: himself as an elderly chinaman.

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Speaker 2: Was always the elderly chinaman every other episode. Yeah, it's

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Speaker 2: great to hear from you, Ricky, thank you very much

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Speaker 2: for giving us a call. We need a question from you,

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Speaker 2: mate for the next person that comes.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god, Oh no.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, pressure's on now, pressures on Ricky ten second that.

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Speaker 4: Oh no, I want to be I want to be

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Speaker 4: smart or funny?

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Speaker 2: Three?

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Speaker 3: Two?

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Speaker 2: One question?

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Speaker 4: Why is it the the FBI couldn't find the eighteen,

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Speaker 4: but an old woman who's been kicked out of her

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Speaker 4: apartment could, But.

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Speaker 2: Ricky, anyone could be called and could get a call

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Speaker 2: from Donald Trump or the Prime Minister of Australia. And

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Speaker 2: I'm going to ask him. Ricky Gervase was just on. Hey, listen,

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Speaker 2: you know in the in the eighteen why could the

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Speaker 2: FBI not find it? But an old woman just been

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Speaker 2: kicked out of her apartment. Yes, thanks for what a gift.

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Speaker 2: Go to bed, all right, Ricky, thank you very much.

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Speaker 2: Take care buddy.

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Speaker 3: Bye.

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Speaker 2: The Christian O'Connell Show Podcast. Someone's on the line for

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Speaker 2: who's calling Christian, Let's find out who it is.

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Speaker 3: Christian. It's Shane war calling here, made from Southampton in England.

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Speaker 2: Sell them to my hometown as well, and Shane the

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Speaker 2: King of Spin, Welcome to the show. I saw a

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Speaker 2: photo a couple of days ago as you and Kevin

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Speaker 2: Peterson was about sort of six meters away, and I

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Speaker 2: didn't know whether that was social distancing or just about

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Speaker 2: as close as you want to get to KP.

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Speaker 3: Well, yes, we were social distancing because we have to

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Speaker 3: do that. But KP's not a big shower person, so

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Speaker 3: he was a bit on the nose, so I had

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Speaker 3: to give him some of my Shane warn fragrance.

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Speaker 2: And I mean, that is how you do it. What

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Speaker 2: a pro tell us about the after shave? Then, I

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Speaker 2: mean were you have you been working on this for

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Speaker 2: a while and you thought I need to bottle. My essence,

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Speaker 2: what is the man must of Shane warn.

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Speaker 3: I decided to join forces with Chemists Warehouse and they

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Speaker 3: came up with a fragrance, and with that we decided

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Speaker 3: to enforceers with My Room Children which cancer and all

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Speaker 3: proceeds from selling the fragrance at chemist Warehouse, all those

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Speaker 3: proceeds and profits go directly to My Room. Because it's

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Speaker 3: a pretty tough year for all charities out there, and

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Speaker 3: there's so many wonderful charities. So we joined forces and

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Speaker 3: the fragrance is selling really well, So thank you to

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Speaker 3: everyone out there who's supported it, and we're raising lots

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Speaker 3: of money for My Room.

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Speaker 2: Now, I don't know how much you know about who's

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Speaker 2: calling Christian various celebrities. When they call a Shanel like yourself,

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Speaker 2: they leave a question for the next person. Now, you're

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Speaker 2: a massive fan of the eighties, Is that right?

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Speaker 3: Yes?

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Speaker 1: I am.

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Speaker 3: I'm a huge fan of the eighties.

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Speaker 2: Mate.

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Speaker 3: Everyone loves the eighties, no matter what they can pretend

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Speaker 3: they don't.

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Speaker 2: So your question is to do with the eighties? Were

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Speaker 2: are you a big fan warning back in the day

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Speaker 2: of the Karate Kid?

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Speaker 1: Yes, I was.

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Speaker 3: I loved it. Daniel Son yeah.

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Speaker 2: And did you like Daniel LaRusso because there's this new

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Speaker 2: series I don't know if fair you've seen it with

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Speaker 2: Cobra Kai. They go back to the characters that are

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Speaker 2: now in their forties and fifties. It's a good show

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Speaker 2: if you love the Karate Kid movies. The TV shirt

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Speaker 2: series which now on Netflix is very good. Amy Shark, right,

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Speaker 2: she was on I know you're a fan. She left

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Speaker 2: this question.

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Speaker 3: For you if they were going to train at a

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Speaker 3: karate dojo, would they train with the Cobra Kayas or

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Speaker 3: would they train with meid?

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Speaker 2: Have you ever trained in any martial art? The thought

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Speaker 2: of you in a karate gi, I mean I would

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Speaker 2: love I would pay good money to see that to

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Speaker 2: any charity. You in a karate outfit?

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Speaker 3: Well, Christian, I've dressed up in many outfits the karate years.

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Speaker 3: Not one that's high on the list, but who knows.

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Speaker 3: There's always the first time for everything. Look, that's an

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Speaker 3: easy one. You have to go for Miagi. He's the man,

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Speaker 3: He's a legend. So definitely gone on Miagi.

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Speaker 2: All right, and what is the question from you? Shane?

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Speaker 2: Warn for the next person to give us a call?

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Speaker 3: Okay, So Waki Racers. There's so many wonderful teams in

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Speaker 3: the Wacky Races, but if you had to support one

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Speaker 3: of them, would you support the an hillm or the

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Speaker 3: Army Surplus Special as you can't go for Dignastardly or

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Speaker 3: any of those ones, or Motley Mattley. You can't go

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Speaker 3: for any of them. It's the Anhill Marble the Army

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Speaker 3: Surplus Special.

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Speaker 1: You got to choose.

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Speaker 2: Have you ever had a crush on a cartoon character?

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Speaker 2: Because I think one of my first crushes as a

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Speaker 2: young teenage boy was Pananope Pit Stop. Have you a

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Speaker 2: fancy a cartoon characters?

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Speaker 3: How hot was she? She was absolutely outstanding Bananope Pitstock.

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Speaker 2: Hey Mornie, it's been a genuine joy and on the

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Speaker 2: other side of the world, but it feels like you're

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Speaker 2: here in the studio. Thank you very much for giving

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Speaker 2: us a call. What a great idea with the aftershave

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Speaker 2: as well.

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Speaker 1: Love The Christian O'Connell show podcast