WEBVTT - S05E01 | It's Layered | Delve Deeper Into... Platonic Friendships

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<v Speaker 1>I'm always always.

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<v Speaker 2>Be careful.

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<v Speaker 3>Love those umboo.

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<v Speaker 1>Let We'll use your head. They will tear you lack

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<v Speaker 1>a purple talk.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh no, no no, yeah, yeah yeah yeah, oh no

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<v Speaker 2>no no. Hi, I'm Amanda and I'm Rumby.

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to its lay it.

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<v Speaker 2>We're in a long distance friendship that started over twenty

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<v Speaker 2>years ago when we were in high school.

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<v Speaker 4>We'll be talking about all things life, love, family, anything

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<v Speaker 4>and everything else under the sun.

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<v Speaker 2>Delve deeper with us because in life, you know.

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<v Speaker 1>My layers. Oh no, no, no, yeah, yeah yeah, yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh no, no, no, welcome everybody. Welcome to season what Amanda?

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<v Speaker 1>Or season start? Oh my lord, I know, Like where

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<v Speaker 1>have the seasons come and gone?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, we're halfway to ten. Yeah that's crazy. I don't

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<v Speaker 2>know if we'll make it to ten guys, But to

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<v Speaker 2>be fair, like this is insane that we're in.

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<v Speaker 1>Five of as a milestone. Five is a milestone?

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<v Speaker 2>Did you did you think we would get to like

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<v Speaker 2>season five?

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<v Speaker 4>Like when we start a girl, I was still surprised

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<v Speaker 4>in season one, so I'm still stuck there, like where

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<v Speaker 4>did we get to five seasons and a special?

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<v Speaker 1>Like it's just insane.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's crazy. Yeah. So I mean, we've been gone

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<v Speaker 2>a while. It's not like it's been a minute. What's

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<v Speaker 2>been happening in your life the way I would like

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<v Speaker 2>to make it seem like things happened, But now thinks

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<v Speaker 2>I've just been life taking a day at a time.

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<v Speaker 2>They say a day at a time positivity.

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<v Speaker 4>I mean, obviously I'm back at work now I'm trying

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<v Speaker 4>to leave is a distant memory. So that's pro of

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<v Speaker 4>the biggest change I've been trying to go from staying

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<v Speaker 4>home mom to work full time work mom.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, how was that adjustment? Right?

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<v Speaker 4>Like, can we take a moment of silence for all

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<v Speaker 4>our queens out there who are balancing this thing? Like

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<v Speaker 4>someone asked me the other day, they were like, you

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<v Speaker 4>love Jerome, He's amazing, But do you regret, like I said,

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<v Speaker 4>you know, like yeah, I think and yeah, in some

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<v Speaker 4>of those moments, I'm like, you really should think this trip.

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<v Speaker 2>Before you before. And that's why I think our parents

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<v Speaker 2>get pissed when we piss them off, because they're like, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>this child all the second time, I don't sacrifice everything

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<v Speaker 2>that don't done for you, and you want to piss me.

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<v Speaker 1>Off, Like I mean, I feel like that with a

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<v Speaker 1>one year old.

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<v Speaker 4>So now I can imagine if you're thirteen, fourteen, fifteen,

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<v Speaker 4>giving me.

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<v Speaker 2>Attitude, giving me attitude, being like I don't want to.

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<v Speaker 4>I absolutely love being a mom, but there's sometimes when

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<v Speaker 4>I'm like, this is truly the ghetto.

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<v Speaker 2>The ghetto, which reminds me. You were actually on Pumi's podcast,

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<v Speaker 2>My Love Good podcast, So if you haven't checked that out,

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<v Speaker 2>I love check out Amanda chatting to Money about motherhood

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<v Speaker 2>and everything that happens, and also check out Boomy's podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>If your mom having a mom going through motherhood. You

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<v Speaker 2>are not alone, so not alone.

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<v Speaker 1>Note what have you been up to?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh girl, I've been lifing like life has been living.

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<v Speaker 2>As you see I cut my horror that.

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<v Speaker 1>I guess you look gorgeous.

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<v Speaker 4>Guys, yeah, not everyone has their head for a short look.

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<v Speaker 4>You look amazing, your check, your cheek.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean if I honestly, I didn't know. When I

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<v Speaker 2>was in the chair, I was just like I wanted off,

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<v Speaker 2>and then when I was sitting in the chair getting

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<v Speaker 2>it cut, I was like, you know, I never thought

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<v Speaker 2>about what if it doesn't work out?

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<v Speaker 4>You know, Yeah, I don't want to make this a

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<v Speaker 4>therapy moment, but what brought you to that decision.

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<v Speaker 1>You know what I mean? I want to act like

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<v Speaker 1>you can act like blass, but we're not hair and

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<v Speaker 1>it's about hair.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, episode a couple of seasons ago. But hair is

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<v Speaker 4>such a culture as women and our gender. So what

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<v Speaker 4>made you cut your hair?

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<v Speaker 1>I think?

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<v Speaker 2>I you know, I've been blessed to have good hair

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<v Speaker 2>and knock on wood all my life and people were like, oh, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>so beautiful. You have such beautiful hair. And anytime I

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<v Speaker 2>wanted to change my hair, it was often like, don't

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<v Speaker 2>do that. So when I was younger, I was like, okay,

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<v Speaker 2>I wanted to put color in my hair. And then

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<v Speaker 2>my mom rightfully so because you don't know how much

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<v Speaker 2>damage you'll do, she was like, oh, I don't think

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<v Speaker 2>that's a good idea. We went to a boarding school

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<v Speaker 2>where there were restrictions on our head, and then of

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<v Speaker 2>course I joined the natural hair movement as I got older,

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<v Speaker 2>and I was like, your hair.

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<v Speaker 1>Is so beautiful.

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<v Speaker 2>You have such a big afro, like you can don't

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<v Speaker 2>cut it. Don't cut it, and so I didn't, and

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<v Speaker 2>then I changed it to locks before I moved here

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<v Speaker 2>for maintenance ease of my feet. But I got tired,

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<v Speaker 2>Like I got tired of the logs, and they were great,

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<v Speaker 2>they served their time and their purpose. But I just

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<v Speaker 2>was like, what if I just cut my hair without

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<v Speaker 2>asking anyone's permission, without doing it for anyone else, but

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<v Speaker 2>just doing it for me as I want to.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, that was a big Remember you were saying that

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<v Speaker 4>it was a style I remember obviously when you spoke

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<v Speaker 4>about this apart from the podcast, you were saying it

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<v Speaker 4>was a style you've never had done as well, like

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<v Speaker 4>having your hair this short, having your hair running shower,

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<v Speaker 4>stepping in the shower. I'm feeling it on your scalp.

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<v Speaker 4>You know, it's absolutely because I's liberating.

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<v Speaker 2>It's very liberating. When I started my locks, I thought

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<v Speaker 2>I would like start short hair, but the timeframe wasn't

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<v Speaker 2>long enough for me to do that. Yeah, so I

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<v Speaker 2>just was like start afresh and then like I can

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<v Speaker 2>decide what I want to do. So, yeah, I've cut

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<v Speaker 2>it short. Now I'll see like if I'll keep it

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<v Speaker 2>short or if I'll start growing it out. But definitely

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<v Speaker 2>the best decision, especially in the summer. You just dive

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<v Speaker 2>in the water like it's been great on holiday, just

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<v Speaker 2>don't even think of twice and you wash your hair.

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<v Speaker 2>You could just step in the shower full head, not

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<v Speaker 2>you know, the dodging as black women, or the shower cap.

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<v Speaker 1>Or the shower even.

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<v Speaker 2>Dodging.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, yeah, So you know those rainwater shower hair

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<v Speaker 1>you like, they look nice yesthetically, but yeah, I'll be

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<v Speaker 1>breaking my neck.

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<v Speaker 2>Break your neck. Come on, break your neck, come on.

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<v Speaker 4>Try to what's been the feedback from the male gaze,

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<v Speaker 4>like in terms of having short hair.

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<v Speaker 2>So quite interesting. My barber, one of his colleagues, was like,

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<v Speaker 2>I think he didn't. He retouched my locks a while

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<v Speaker 2>ago prior and then he was like, oh, I see

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<v Speaker 2>you cut your hair, and he was like, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>the locks are nice, but this really suits you. It

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<v Speaker 2>really does. Same with my husband. Initially he was like,

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<v Speaker 2>don't cut your hair, baby, don't cut and then now

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<v Speaker 2>he loves and he's like, I love it. You can

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<v Speaker 2>keep it like this. Then. Of course some people have

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<v Speaker 2>the idea of oh, dark black girl cuts her hair.

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<v Speaker 2>Of course white men like that, and so on and

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<v Speaker 2>so forth. But it's been interesting some people. Someone was like,

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<v Speaker 2>you look like a singer or some musician or some

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<v Speaker 2>you know, I guess it's a very distinct look. So

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<v Speaker 2>I think people are kind of like, you have to

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<v Speaker 2>be someone quote unquote special or to be able.

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<v Speaker 1>To pull it off, to carry the look. Yeah, you

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<v Speaker 1>have to carry the look.

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<v Speaker 2>But I explained to people, especially hear my white counterparts,

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<v Speaker 2>that back home, it's normal to see women with short hair,

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<v Speaker 2>long hair hair with like we don't think because here

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<v Speaker 2>they don't people who cut their hair really short. It's

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<v Speaker 2>like a statement or rebellion or you know, kind of

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<v Speaker 2>out of necessity, sometimes through things like cancer. But for us,

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<v Speaker 2>it's like a choice. So I think that's been interesting

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<v Speaker 2>to to educate them on. I've been challenged also, like

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<v Speaker 2>conversations with some actually some friends of mine who are like,

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<v Speaker 2>how do you feel about your femininity? So they're part

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<v Speaker 2>of the LGBTQ community, and spoke about their own perception

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<v Speaker 2>of having shorter hair, and like how that they they

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<v Speaker 2>perceived perceive you've done kind of like, okay, doesn't make

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<v Speaker 2>me seem more masculine or feminine, I feel like, and

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<v Speaker 2>they felt that they needed to have long hair to

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<v Speaker 2>be more sort of like in their truth. And I

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<v Speaker 2>was like, you know what, it's quite true. Like sometimes

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<v Speaker 2>people are like, oh, you know, why don't you wear earrings.

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<v Speaker 2>I've been told many times you should wear ear rings,

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<v Speaker 2>or like some days I don't want to put on

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<v Speaker 2>makeup and makeup, Oh then do I look like a boy?

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<v Speaker 2>You know?

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, that's always been the language, right, Like if you

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<v Speaker 4>have short hair, then you have to do everything else.

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<v Speaker 1>You have to have nice eyebrows, nice makeup because people

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<v Speaker 1>really then look at your your face.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Yeah, So it's been it's been a lot of

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<v Speaker 2>like me being like it's okay, or just being like,

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<v Speaker 2>what would I do on an average And on an

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<v Speaker 2>average day, I probably would do my eyebrows an eyeliner

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<v Speaker 2>and then I can do that or maybe a lip

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<v Speaker 2>and I can do that still, but seeing myself in

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<v Speaker 2>the mirror and seeing my face, I feel like I've

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<v Speaker 2>seen myself truly in a weird way for the first time,

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<v Speaker 2>like really having like it you and your face, only

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<v Speaker 2>you're not hiding behind anything. So it's been yeah, yeah, Well,

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<v Speaker 2>we're so glad to be back for this season. And

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<v Speaker 2>we thought we'd actually just touched on Actually we spoke

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<v Speaker 2>a little bit about friendship, but talk about a topic

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<v Speaker 2>that was proposed to us by a listener, And what's

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<v Speaker 2>that Amanda tell us a.

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<v Speaker 4>Little more platonic friendships.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, And what's the diffinition of platonic because it sounds

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<v Speaker 2>like a big word. It's like, it sounds like.

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<v Speaker 4>Sounds like you know, well, I guess it's and I

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<v Speaker 4>guess it's going to be told through a heterosexual female lens,

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<v Speaker 4>because it's like that friendship that you would have with

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<v Speaker 4>the opposite sex, and this isn't our case would be male. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 4>that's got nothing to do with any flirty business, any

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<v Speaker 4>I want you business. Literally, it's two friends. It so

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<v Speaker 4>happens to be we're opposite genders. Yes, that's the definition

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<v Speaker 4>of platonic to me.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, what about you? I agree. I think if

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<v Speaker 2>anyone has watched on Netflix Survival of the Thickest, we

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<v Speaker 2>see Mavis and her friend she has a platonic friendship.

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<v Speaker 2>And even I listened to an interview subsequently of them

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<v Speaker 2>talking about the show and how she was told by people, Oh,

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<v Speaker 2>they're going to sleep together, and she's like, it's a

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<v Speaker 2>platonic friendship, Like.

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<v Speaker 1>Why do they have to Yeah, that does he have

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<v Speaker 1>to be gay?

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<v Speaker 4>Because that's the whole thing with a gay best friend

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<v Speaker 4>came from that exactly.

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<v Speaker 2>So yeah, I think it's really having a mutual respect

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<v Speaker 2>for each other and understanding that you're in each other's

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<v Speaker 2>lives to hold each other up, I guess, and support

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<v Speaker 2>each other in a way that is just a friendship

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<v Speaker 2>with no sort of no strings, no strings essentially, you're

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<v Speaker 2>not trying to hop into each other's pants. To put

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<v Speaker 2>it bluntly, Do.

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<v Speaker 1>You have more girlfriends than guy friends?

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<v Speaker 2>I think so. I think I definitely have like a

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<v Speaker 2>squad of girlfriends that serve different purposes, and I think

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<v Speaker 2>that's the whole point of friendship. You have friends who

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<v Speaker 2>do different things. So I think that's why people have

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<v Speaker 2>platonic friendship, because a male perspective, you know, can give

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<v Speaker 2>you a different you know what I mean, give you.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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<v Speaker 4>Do you think it was like in why like do

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<v Speaker 4>you think why more girls and boys that just so

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<v Speaker 4>happened to work?

0:11:42.520 --> 0:11:45.120
<v Speaker 2>Because I went to boarding school and you know, we

0:11:45.240 --> 0:11:49.000
<v Speaker 2>used to live like ladies all the time. I think

0:11:49.040 --> 0:11:53.840
<v Speaker 2>I've just always had an easier relationship with women compared

0:11:53.880 --> 0:11:56.520
<v Speaker 2>to men. And we've spoken about, you know, our history

0:11:56.559 --> 0:11:58.599
<v Speaker 2>and background and all that. So I think it's just

0:11:58.760 --> 0:12:02.400
<v Speaker 2>I feel I felt safe in relationship with women. I

0:12:02.480 --> 0:12:05.959
<v Speaker 2>don't know, and you what's your dynamic bind like do

0:12:06.040 --> 0:12:07.479
<v Speaker 2>you feel your girlfriends?

0:12:07.640 --> 0:12:09.959
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I definitely have more guy friends.

0:12:10.080 --> 0:12:12.880
<v Speaker 4>I mean I'm someone who's sociable, So I suppose friends

0:12:13.040 --> 0:12:15.800
<v Speaker 4>is a loose word right when it comes to like

0:12:16.040 --> 0:12:20.680
<v Speaker 4>closer friends ride or dies. As they say, I probably

0:12:20.760 --> 0:12:24.760
<v Speaker 4>have more male than female, and I think it's just

0:12:25.840 --> 0:12:29.079
<v Speaker 4>again I suppose opposite of you. I felt also more

0:12:29.120 --> 0:12:32.480
<v Speaker 4>secure with males. I have all brothers, so I guess

0:12:32.520 --> 0:12:35.360
<v Speaker 4>I never didn't have a sister, So I guess it's

0:12:35.440 --> 0:12:38.839
<v Speaker 4>like you just grow up with that energy, like that

0:12:39.160 --> 0:12:43.199
<v Speaker 4>male masculine energy, and that's what I kind of relate to.

0:12:44.160 --> 0:12:44.920
<v Speaker 1>So I suppose that.

0:12:45.120 --> 0:12:47.400
<v Speaker 4>And that's why even my dad sent me to Peters

0:12:47.440 --> 0:12:49.400
<v Speaker 4>because you was like it, brih, you need to be

0:12:50.160 --> 0:12:52.959
<v Speaker 4>around the ladies, around the la. You can't be a

0:12:53.040 --> 0:12:55.599
<v Speaker 4>tomboy your whole life. You can't be climbing pleas and

0:12:55.720 --> 0:12:58.640
<v Speaker 4>getting you know, with these boys like and I guess

0:12:58.920 --> 0:13:01.600
<v Speaker 4>also with boys there's a bit of competitiveness. I suppose

0:13:01.800 --> 0:13:05.280
<v Speaker 4>you probably saw that in me, like that energy and

0:13:05.520 --> 0:13:08.640
<v Speaker 4>you want to like level the playing fields. I'm really

0:13:08.720 --> 0:13:11.559
<v Speaker 4>appreciative and I love That's why I loved going to

0:13:11.840 --> 0:13:14.160
<v Speaker 4>my high school because I was really at a at

0:13:14.200 --> 0:13:17.000
<v Speaker 4>a good time, I think to balance things and make

0:13:17.040 --> 0:13:20.839
<v Speaker 4>me a bit of Yeah, yeah, I think it's just

0:13:20.960 --> 0:13:24.079
<v Speaker 4>it's just it's so happened to be. I don't consciously

0:13:24.160 --> 0:13:26.640
<v Speaker 4>look out for it, but I just find those are

0:13:26.679 --> 0:13:30.319
<v Speaker 4>the energies. It's more like, and I suppose that you

0:13:30.480 --> 0:13:34.559
<v Speaker 4>brought up the lgbt QI community, and it's more like,

0:13:34.679 --> 0:13:36.640
<v Speaker 4>sometimes you can just fall in love with someone and

0:13:36.800 --> 0:13:39.040
<v Speaker 4>not the genet doesn't matter.

0:13:39.320 --> 0:13:41.760
<v Speaker 1>So for me, it so happened. It feels like it

0:13:41.880 --> 0:13:43.800
<v Speaker 1>so happened. It wasn't on purpose.

0:13:45.320 --> 0:13:47.480
<v Speaker 2>I get you, I get you. That makes sense. Do

0:13:47.600 --> 0:13:50.199
<v Speaker 2>you believe? So? The ultimate question that everyone always asks

0:13:50.320 --> 0:13:54.199
<v Speaker 2>is do you believe that male and females can just

0:13:54.400 --> 0:13:56.040
<v Speaker 2>be friends? Is it possible?

0:13:56.920 --> 0:14:01.400
<v Speaker 1>Well, I guess, given mind your case, I have to

0:14:01.440 --> 0:14:03.680
<v Speaker 1>say I think yes.

0:14:05.679 --> 0:14:07.800
<v Speaker 2>Do you think? But I think do you think lines

0:14:07.880 --> 0:14:10.840
<v Speaker 2>ever get like you have to go through a period

0:14:10.920 --> 0:14:13.800
<v Speaker 2>of flurred lines, like or different.

0:14:15.760 --> 0:14:18.000
<v Speaker 1>I was just about to say, I think yes if

0:14:18.240 --> 0:14:19.560
<v Speaker 1>it started that way.

0:14:20.240 --> 0:14:21.880
<v Speaker 4>Do you know what I mean that you know, you

0:14:21.960 --> 0:14:26.760
<v Speaker 4>meet someone and you're like you almost like box them immediately,

0:14:27.040 --> 0:14:30.320
<v Speaker 4>like yeah, you know, he my brother here, my brother here,

0:14:30.840 --> 0:14:33.600
<v Speaker 4>he my real dog, like you don't even think of

0:14:33.800 --> 0:14:36.760
<v Speaker 4>them that way. I've had a few situations which you'll

0:14:36.800 --> 0:14:38.600
<v Speaker 4>get into later on in the episode. Obviously, when you

0:14:38.680 --> 0:14:42.280
<v Speaker 4>meet someone and you are physically attracted to them and

0:14:42.360 --> 0:14:44.640
<v Speaker 4>then you end up being friends. So then maybe those

0:14:44.680 --> 0:14:47.200
<v Speaker 4>ones you can't just be friends. But there's some people

0:14:47.280 --> 0:14:50.160
<v Speaker 4>you meet and you're not or like your play cousins, right,

0:14:50.240 --> 0:14:52.360
<v Speaker 4>and we have this a modern especially if you go

0:14:52.400 --> 0:14:54.800
<v Speaker 4>to the same church, or if you grow up in

0:14:54.840 --> 0:14:58.320
<v Speaker 4>the same road, go to the same junior school, where

0:14:58.320 --> 0:15:01.760
<v Speaker 4>you're like, Brah, I've seen you like in your diapers,

0:15:01.840 --> 0:15:04.520
<v Speaker 4>like I've seen you doing everything, Like I don't look

0:15:04.560 --> 0:15:08.800
<v Speaker 4>at you attractive, so yeah, yeah, like someone else, I

0:15:08.880 --> 0:15:10.600
<v Speaker 4>think you're fly, but I certainly don't.

0:15:10.760 --> 0:15:11.760
<v Speaker 2>Like Yeah, it's like that.

0:15:12.440 --> 0:15:16.960
<v Speaker 1>So it just depends where the root of the friendship. Yeah,

0:15:17.080 --> 0:15:19.360
<v Speaker 1>what do you think I think it's.

0:15:20.880 --> 0:15:24.960
<v Speaker 2>It's I really think it's an individual thing because I

0:15:25.080 --> 0:15:26.920
<v Speaker 2>don't think there's such a blanket thing of saying like

0:15:27.000 --> 0:15:29.160
<v Speaker 2>everyone can be friends like male and female and it

0:15:29.320 --> 0:15:33.200
<v Speaker 2>just be platonic or they can't. And I think, especially

0:15:33.360 --> 0:15:36.400
<v Speaker 2>coming from a religious upbringing, it was very much like

0:15:36.920 --> 0:15:40.280
<v Speaker 2>you can't be friends or like, once you're married, you

0:15:40.840 --> 0:15:43.680
<v Speaker 2>cannot have male friends, do you know what I mean? Like, yeah,

0:15:43.760 --> 0:15:47.440
<v Speaker 2>definitely depends on how you So I come from that history.

0:15:47.600 --> 0:15:50.760
<v Speaker 2>A lot of the time, I've been fortunate to gain

0:15:51.080 --> 0:15:55.200
<v Speaker 2>male friends along the way in terms of being able

0:15:55.280 --> 0:15:58.960
<v Speaker 2>to not even consider certain do you get what I mean?

0:16:00.120 --> 0:16:06.400
<v Speaker 2>I find though, I'm very conscious and also very respectful,

0:16:06.480 --> 0:16:08.360
<v Speaker 2>So I always like, especially if they have a partner

0:16:08.880 --> 0:16:11.240
<v Speaker 2>or a wife or something, I'm very conscious to also

0:16:11.360 --> 0:16:14.680
<v Speaker 2>be like greetings to you know you do you understand

0:16:14.680 --> 0:16:16.160
<v Speaker 2>what I'm saying? Like I do. I think that's a

0:16:16.200 --> 0:16:18.280
<v Speaker 2>little bit of that kind of thing, like make sure

0:16:18.320 --> 0:16:20.440
<v Speaker 2>you make sure the line is separate. But the line

0:16:20.520 --> 0:16:23.880
<v Speaker 2>was separate anyway, but like very conscious to be like,

0:16:23.960 --> 0:16:26.920
<v Speaker 2>oh say hi to x x Y your wife or

0:16:27.480 --> 0:16:28.480
<v Speaker 2>you know, type of things.

0:16:29.080 --> 0:16:29.760
<v Speaker 1>It's okay.

0:16:30.880 --> 0:16:34.040
<v Speaker 2>The influence I was just thinking about it, like how

0:16:34.120 --> 0:16:38.840
<v Speaker 2>that has influenced how I engage or talk to you know,

0:16:39.560 --> 0:16:42.080
<v Speaker 2>certain certain friends. Yeah it's crazy.

0:16:42.280 --> 0:16:43.840
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, it's crazy.

0:16:44.200 --> 0:16:46.200
<v Speaker 4>Have you ever crossed the line with any of your

0:16:46.240 --> 0:16:50.560
<v Speaker 4>guy friends feelings, actions, or you made the first move?

0:16:51.640 --> 0:16:57.480
<v Speaker 2>No, I don't think so, No, not no, No, I

0:16:57.560 --> 0:17:04.600
<v Speaker 2>mean I have made extensive but I'm like, I don't yeah, no, no.

0:17:05.280 --> 0:17:09.399
<v Speaker 4>Like, well, child, given our romantic life in high school,

0:17:09.440 --> 0:17:12.280
<v Speaker 4>I don't think this is a yeah, it's not really applicable.

0:17:13.760 --> 0:17:15.800
<v Speaker 2>I don't think yeah, yeah, I don't know.

0:17:15.880 --> 0:17:17.720
<v Speaker 3>Maybe for you, like you can go back to our

0:17:17.800 --> 0:17:20.880
<v Speaker 3>dating episode, yeah, or non dating life exactly.

0:17:21.359 --> 0:17:24.080
<v Speaker 2>I think in some regard, like there could have been

0:17:24.160 --> 0:17:27.879
<v Speaker 2>a bit of like hmm, what could or could not

0:17:28.040 --> 0:17:30.360
<v Speaker 2>be there, but in the end it was not there.

0:17:30.560 --> 0:17:32.879
<v Speaker 2>That's what I was saying, like going through a stage

0:17:32.920 --> 0:17:35.119
<v Speaker 2>of like what like you're saying, like depends how you

0:17:35.280 --> 0:17:37.520
<v Speaker 2>meet and then what context and kind of like oh

0:17:37.640 --> 0:17:40.040
<v Speaker 2>could this or could and then I friend zone was

0:17:40.080 --> 0:17:41.880
<v Speaker 2>a big thing. I just friend zoned a lot of people.

0:17:42.000 --> 0:17:43.960
<v Speaker 2>Apparently I was wrong to friend zone a lot of

0:17:44.000 --> 0:17:47.200
<v Speaker 2>people in high school, to be fair, but I just

0:17:47.320 --> 0:17:49.440
<v Speaker 2>read it as that and then I kept pushing if

0:17:49.480 --> 0:17:50.320
<v Speaker 2>that makes sense.

0:17:50.200 --> 0:17:53.560
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I think I think, yeah, I'm

0:17:53.640 --> 0:17:57.040
<v Speaker 4>similar to you, Like before the line could even be crossed,

0:17:57.160 --> 0:18:01.160
<v Speaker 4>the friend zone was in my zone my phone. Yeah,

0:18:01.440 --> 0:18:04.560
<v Speaker 4>so like I didn't probably get the chance of opportunity

0:18:05.119 --> 0:18:08.520
<v Speaker 4>to really cross the line because yeah, because it wasn't

0:18:08.560 --> 0:18:09.480
<v Speaker 4>presented that way.

0:18:09.600 --> 0:18:11.720
<v Speaker 1>It was just like oh yeah, we're just homies.

0:18:11.960 --> 0:18:15.320
<v Speaker 2>Yes about another girl or you see that.

0:18:15.720 --> 0:18:20.240
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, And the thing is with them barbweans especially naturally

0:18:20.320 --> 0:18:23.399
<v Speaker 4>as the people were very witty, we're very joky, so

0:18:23.720 --> 0:18:24.840
<v Speaker 4>like I'm charming.

0:18:25.480 --> 0:18:27.440
<v Speaker 1>So then like when someone's.

0:18:27.200 --> 0:18:30.320
<v Speaker 4>Flirting what people would call flirting, you just like it's

0:18:30.359 --> 0:18:33.000
<v Speaker 4>just joking, you know, you don't take it like they

0:18:33.080 --> 0:18:38.280
<v Speaker 4>have to be very blatant. Yeah exactly, and oh okay,

0:18:38.720 --> 0:18:38.960
<v Speaker 4>and you.

0:18:39.040 --> 0:18:43.680
<v Speaker 2>Know clear unless it's like you're for this person and

0:18:43.800 --> 0:18:44.960
<v Speaker 2>you're left in this gray.

0:18:45.320 --> 0:18:47.440
<v Speaker 1>So I never really and I think I'm one of

0:18:47.480 --> 0:18:47.920
<v Speaker 1>those people.

0:18:48.040 --> 0:18:52.639
<v Speaker 4>I would I'm very like decisive about my feelings about someone,

0:18:53.160 --> 0:18:56.080
<v Speaker 4>so like I think I wouldn't really even allow myself

0:18:56.119 --> 0:18:57.679
<v Speaker 4>because I'm just like, no.

0:18:57.720 --> 0:18:58.600
<v Speaker 1>We're friends, you know.

0:18:58.760 --> 0:19:01.679
<v Speaker 4>So then it's like, even if you found them attractive,

0:19:02.480 --> 0:19:04.200
<v Speaker 4>it would have to they would have to follow through

0:19:04.280 --> 0:19:06.520
<v Speaker 4>with the action that if they don't, then it's like, oh, yes,

0:19:06.800 --> 0:19:07.439
<v Speaker 4>I think that's.

0:19:07.400 --> 0:19:10.639
<v Speaker 2>Just that's so true. It's like, if you're not gonna

0:19:10.760 --> 0:19:13.640
<v Speaker 2>make any move or anything for me, I'm like, I'm

0:19:13.680 --> 0:19:18.080
<v Speaker 2>not trying to also ruin the friendship that has developed

0:19:18.440 --> 0:19:20.879
<v Speaker 2>and also not just be out there like put because

0:19:20.880 --> 0:19:22.440
<v Speaker 2>we didn't grow up in the era of like put

0:19:22.480 --> 0:19:25.119
<v Speaker 2>yourself out there that was this is a very modern

0:19:25.880 --> 0:19:27.879
<v Speaker 2>I make it sound like we're but you know it's

0:19:27.920 --> 0:19:30.240
<v Speaker 2>a very modern also a society. It's like you don't

0:19:30.320 --> 0:19:32.800
<v Speaker 2>put yourself out there and say, ao, I be feeling

0:19:32.880 --> 0:19:34.840
<v Speaker 2>you or I not be feeling you know what I mean?

0:19:35.400 --> 0:19:37.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:19:38.160 --> 0:19:41.000
<v Speaker 4>What do you find you appreciate the most about your

0:19:41.040 --> 0:19:43.240
<v Speaker 4>friendships with the opposite sex?

0:19:43.320 --> 0:19:43.520
<v Speaker 1>Though?

0:19:43.840 --> 0:19:50.080
<v Speaker 2>It's easy. It's like so easy, no hard feelings. You

0:19:50.119 --> 0:19:55.680
<v Speaker 2>can just jokey, jokey joke, No, you pick your left

0:19:55.720 --> 0:19:58.399
<v Speaker 2>off like I have read, like I won't talk to

0:19:58.480 --> 0:20:01.680
<v Speaker 2>them like in or whatever. But then like we just

0:20:02.000 --> 0:20:06.520
<v Speaker 2>keep it moving. And yeah, it's like not complicated, it's

0:20:06.600 --> 0:20:12.359
<v Speaker 2>just like honest no bs no, because I think guys,

0:20:12.960 --> 0:20:17.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm obviously talking about heterosexual men don't sweach too much

0:20:17.640 --> 0:20:21.240
<v Speaker 2>the nitty gritty, so it's like stuff. But then that

0:20:21.400 --> 0:20:25.080
<v Speaker 2>time when you didn't add a smiley face, it yeah, yeah,

0:20:25.280 --> 0:20:28.520
<v Speaker 2>like goes over their heads. Yeah yeah, it goes absolutely.

0:20:28.600 --> 0:20:31.159
<v Speaker 2>So I think it's easy and I think it's a

0:20:31.760 --> 0:20:35.080
<v Speaker 2>good perspective. It gives a good perspective on how the

0:20:35.160 --> 0:20:38.399
<v Speaker 2>other half sees the world. And yeah, I feel like

0:20:38.520 --> 0:20:42.280
<v Speaker 2>it's very genuine too. They support you. There's no like

0:20:42.520 --> 0:20:45.359
<v Speaker 2>I support you, but I'm see I'm jealous.

0:20:45.440 --> 0:20:46.639
<v Speaker 1>Yeah I'm also competing with you.

0:20:46.960 --> 0:20:51.879
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, none of that. It's just like simple I don't know.

0:20:52.119 --> 0:20:54.200
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I think so too.

0:20:54.400 --> 0:20:57.920
<v Speaker 4>And I like in my friendships, especially the closer ones

0:20:58.040 --> 0:21:02.720
<v Speaker 4>two brothers really because it's like it becomes a protective mode.

0:21:02.840 --> 0:21:04.879
<v Speaker 4>This is a I'm protected like a sibling. I'm just

0:21:04.960 --> 0:21:08.440
<v Speaker 4>as protective of them as they are of me. And

0:21:10.680 --> 0:21:13.360
<v Speaker 4>I think I do like the pick it up where

0:21:13.400 --> 0:21:16.200
<v Speaker 4>you left off, especially now as a new mom when

0:21:16.320 --> 0:21:20.560
<v Speaker 4>time is really poor. It's sad that right now in

0:21:20.600 --> 0:21:23.600
<v Speaker 4>my life, I just don't have enough to give to everyone,

0:21:23.760 --> 0:21:27.480
<v Speaker 4>you know. So it's like and including myself. So it's like, okay,

0:21:27.640 --> 0:21:30.119
<v Speaker 4>I need friendships that are easy as you said, that

0:21:30.359 --> 0:21:33.400
<v Speaker 4>are pick up where you left off, that are what's

0:21:33.480 --> 0:21:35.080
<v Speaker 4>going on and you just carry on.

0:21:35.200 --> 0:21:37.360
<v Speaker 1>It's not like, oh, you didn't come to my branch.

0:21:37.160 --> 0:21:41.120
<v Speaker 4>Last week and there it's just like simple and easy

0:21:41.600 --> 0:21:43.920
<v Speaker 4>and you know you do want to hang out, yes, no,

0:21:44.160 --> 0:21:48.280
<v Speaker 4>And there's no like complicated language as well. It's just

0:21:48.440 --> 0:21:52.560
<v Speaker 4>like yeah, I'm kind of it's kind of over an hour. Yeah, yeah,

0:21:52.600 --> 0:21:53.600
<v Speaker 4>do you want to watch the so car? Do you

0:21:53.640 --> 0:21:55.840
<v Speaker 4>want to watch the It's not like it's doesn't come

0:21:55.880 --> 0:21:58.480
<v Speaker 4>with the heaviness. I think that women we put upon

0:21:58.560 --> 0:22:03.760
<v Speaker 4>ourselves the expectations I suppose that women put on friendships.

0:22:03.960 --> 0:22:06.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and I think too it balances you know, even

0:22:06.640 --> 0:22:10.920
<v Speaker 2>as women we have feminine energy and masculine energy and

0:22:11.119 --> 0:22:13.919
<v Speaker 2>like balance right in life. I don't know, like.

0:22:14.480 --> 0:22:18.840
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, yeah, and what it does give perspective when you're

0:22:18.880 --> 0:22:22.000
<v Speaker 4>fighting with your hobby or something, You're like, Brah.

0:22:22.480 --> 0:22:25.880
<v Speaker 1>Didn't they remind you how men think? You're like, oh yeah, yeah,

0:22:26.200 --> 0:22:27.880
<v Speaker 1>as girls, we encourage time.

0:22:27.960 --> 0:22:31.400
<v Speaker 4>I will be like, ah, like what you're talking about,

0:22:31.400 --> 0:22:33.600
<v Speaker 4>feminine masculine energy, we think the same.

0:22:33.760 --> 0:22:35.359
<v Speaker 1>Then you're not going to find many.

0:22:35.240 --> 0:22:37.080
<v Speaker 4>Girls who are going to give you a different perspective

0:22:37.160 --> 0:22:39.439
<v Speaker 4>because they would act the same as you are.

0:22:40.040 --> 0:22:42.280
<v Speaker 1>It's nice to have that person to be like, what

0:22:42.359 --> 0:22:44.280
<v Speaker 1>do you think and see it in a different way?

0:22:44.720 --> 0:22:47.000
<v Speaker 2>What do you appreciate least about male friendships?

0:22:47.960 --> 0:22:50.840
<v Speaker 4>I think I think like you brought up partners. I

0:22:50.920 --> 0:22:54.119
<v Speaker 4>think that's what I probably, which sounds like I'm women bashing,

0:22:54.560 --> 0:23:00.680
<v Speaker 4>but like it's it's just me that delicate balance of

0:23:03.400 --> 0:23:06.080
<v Speaker 4>I think, out of all the types of friendships, platonic

0:23:06.160 --> 0:23:09.160
<v Speaker 4>friendships are misunderstood by those who don't have them.

0:23:09.600 --> 0:23:11.200
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, that makes sense.

0:23:11.800 --> 0:23:14.639
<v Speaker 4>So if they don't have a real dog who's a

0:23:14.720 --> 0:23:18.879
<v Speaker 4>male that they didn't meet sexually and want to be

0:23:18.960 --> 0:23:20.959
<v Speaker 4>in their parts blah blah, then it's hard for them

0:23:21.040 --> 0:23:23.359
<v Speaker 4>to appreciate that when they see that in their partner

0:23:23.440 --> 0:23:26.159
<v Speaker 4>with another girl. Yes, yeah, for sure, you know, I

0:23:26.320 --> 0:23:29.640
<v Speaker 4>find the the Then that becomes delicate because then it's

0:23:29.760 --> 0:23:33.359
<v Speaker 4>like you have to first explain the whole philosophy behind

0:23:33.440 --> 0:23:34.400
<v Speaker 4>platonic friendships.

0:23:34.400 --> 0:23:36.520
<v Speaker 1>There's nothing here. I don't want your man. He doesn't

0:23:36.560 --> 0:23:39.400
<v Speaker 1>want me think of me as a man as well.

0:23:39.600 --> 0:23:43.720
<v Speaker 4>Pretty much i'm his boy, like you know, is that bad?

0:23:44.040 --> 0:23:46.760
<v Speaker 4>Like he does not look at me he's sexually and

0:23:47.280 --> 0:23:49.120
<v Speaker 4>not look at him, you know, And I don't look

0:23:49.119 --> 0:23:53.160
<v Speaker 4>at him that way too. But because so it comes

0:23:53.320 --> 0:23:57.199
<v Speaker 4>with a lot of like if I want to hang

0:23:57.240 --> 0:23:59.200
<v Speaker 4>out with you room to check, I don't have to

0:23:59.320 --> 0:24:01.320
<v Speaker 4>check in with Tom as much, you know what I mean.

0:24:01.640 --> 0:24:03.440
<v Speaker 4>But if I want to hang out with a male friend,

0:24:03.840 --> 0:24:06.120
<v Speaker 4>I can't. As you said yourself, when you're like messaging

0:24:06.119 --> 0:24:08.080
<v Speaker 4>your male friends you always say greetings to, but you

0:24:08.119 --> 0:24:11.119
<v Speaker 4>wouldn't do that to me, essentially like a chat and

0:24:11.200 --> 0:24:14.080
<v Speaker 4>you cannot say say hi to myself and that's fine,

0:24:14.560 --> 0:24:15.720
<v Speaker 4>but with you, you're.

0:24:15.600 --> 0:24:17.280
<v Speaker 1>Saying you consciously do it for lunch.

0:24:18.000 --> 0:24:20.920
<v Speaker 4>So it's like, I think it's that because people don't

0:24:21.200 --> 0:24:25.159
<v Speaker 4>understand it. So when you find true platonic friendships, you

0:24:25.240 --> 0:24:29.600
<v Speaker 4>almost have to have people who also understand platonic friendship.

0:24:29.680 --> 0:24:32.600
<v Speaker 2>But don't you think it's also media, right, because we

0:24:32.680 --> 0:24:34.760
<v Speaker 2>watch all these promcorms where it's like, oh, we're just

0:24:34.840 --> 0:24:36.440
<v Speaker 2>for it. I think there was recently I watched the

0:24:36.520 --> 0:24:39.400
<v Speaker 2>one with Reese with a Spoon and Ashs on Netflix.

0:24:39.880 --> 0:24:43.960
<v Speaker 2>It's not a great watch, but I mean, okay, but

0:24:44.160 --> 0:24:46.720
<v Speaker 2>like literally that storyline of like they've been friends for

0:24:48.640 --> 0:24:51.240
<v Speaker 2>like ages and if you think of movies like Love

0:24:51.320 --> 0:24:54.200
<v Speaker 2>and Basketball, you know what I mean?

0:24:54.320 --> 0:24:57.680
<v Speaker 4>And yeah, yeah, but do you say how in those,

0:24:57.800 --> 0:25:01.720
<v Speaker 4>even Love and Basketball or the those, the root of

0:25:01.840 --> 0:25:05.399
<v Speaker 4>how they met usually had some sort of sexual encounter

0:25:06.000 --> 0:25:08.000
<v Speaker 4>and then it grew and then it's like, oh, yeah,

0:25:08.080 --> 0:25:12.000
<v Speaker 4>let's circle back. But like true platonic you'll be like brah,

0:25:12.359 --> 0:25:14.359
<v Speaker 4>I literally yeah want you.

0:25:14.600 --> 0:25:17.320
<v Speaker 2>But by the way, we don't differentiate people just know

0:25:17.520 --> 0:25:21.880
<v Speaker 2>as like it's the only way to go. It's true.

0:25:22.800 --> 0:25:26.160
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, So it's like the language around it, the support

0:25:26.280 --> 0:25:28.720
<v Speaker 4>system around them, because then a lot of times people

0:25:28.720 --> 0:25:31.359
<v Speaker 4>will be like, by my wife is not comfortable. So

0:25:32.200 --> 0:25:34.680
<v Speaker 4>that's that the friendship just and also men, as you said,

0:25:34.680 --> 0:25:37.359
<v Speaker 4>they're very directing their communication so that when they say that,

0:25:37.480 --> 0:25:39.600
<v Speaker 4>then what do you You can't be like fight for me,

0:25:39.800 --> 0:25:43.080
<v Speaker 4>I'm your friend, like it's just like okay, And then

0:25:43.160 --> 0:25:46.600
<v Speaker 4>the friendship the syntig you know what I mean?

0:25:46.960 --> 0:25:51.760
<v Speaker 2>And like, so how would those how would you in

0:25:51.880 --> 0:25:55.440
<v Speaker 2>that sense navigate a situation where you understand you and

0:25:55.560 --> 0:25:59.320
<v Speaker 2>your friend, your male friend understand that it's plutonic maybe

0:25:59.359 --> 0:26:02.240
<v Speaker 2>a partner partner doesn't necessary how to navigate that?

0:26:03.160 --> 0:26:04.520
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, well give us.

0:26:06.000 --> 0:26:07.879
<v Speaker 4>I think for me what's helped is also trying to

0:26:07.960 --> 0:26:12.359
<v Speaker 4>befriend the partner, right, so I then not don't become

0:26:12.560 --> 0:26:16.000
<v Speaker 4>just your friend, that become you know, both of your friends,

0:26:16.200 --> 0:26:17.920
<v Speaker 4>you know, but then that you also have to have

0:26:18.000 --> 0:26:21.119
<v Speaker 4>your allegiance because but when they argue, you have to

0:26:21.280 --> 0:26:26.639
<v Speaker 4>know Markey, what has Basically I fox with you but

0:26:26.760 --> 0:26:29.800
<v Speaker 4>not that much. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, just like I

0:26:29.960 --> 0:26:33.200
<v Speaker 4>hang with you but all right or that, yeah, I

0:26:33.280 --> 0:26:36.199
<v Speaker 4>do for your husband. So it's like I think they

0:26:36.240 --> 0:26:37.080
<v Speaker 4>have to get to know you.

0:26:37.640 --> 0:26:40.679
<v Speaker 1>It does help that I'm in a relationship. Obviously. When

0:26:40.720 --> 0:26:43.080
<v Speaker 1>I was a single woman, it was a whole.

0:26:44.520 --> 0:26:47.600
<v Speaker 4>Thing because it was like especially single woman and going

0:26:47.880 --> 0:26:50.960
<v Speaker 4>out because then if the boys are going out, like oh, come, let's.

0:26:50.800 --> 0:26:53.320
<v Speaker 1>Go out, and then you're there the only girl there.

0:26:54.080 --> 0:26:57.359
<v Speaker 1>It's just the optics with your bad.

0:26:58.359 --> 0:27:02.840
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. I've actually been in situations where they were girlfriends.

0:27:03.080 --> 0:27:05.480
<v Speaker 2>I was single at the time. Then the little boyfriends.

0:27:06.280 --> 0:27:07.679
<v Speaker 2>I tried hanging with the girls.

0:27:08.119 --> 0:27:09.720
<v Speaker 1>It was so hard for me.

0:27:10.240 --> 0:27:12.800
<v Speaker 2>Like also, women were not very inclusive. Let's be honest.

0:27:12.880 --> 0:27:18.320
<v Speaker 2>Sometimes it's very much like you you can't click energy me.

0:27:18.440 --> 0:27:20.240
<v Speaker 2>I was like, you know, I'm actually more homies with

0:27:20.320 --> 0:27:22.679
<v Speaker 2>the dudes, like where you hang with you like, let

0:27:22.720 --> 0:27:25.760
<v Speaker 2>me go hang with the dudes by the sand, you know. Yeah,

0:27:26.840 --> 0:27:28.760
<v Speaker 2>then the girls get touched now and then now they

0:27:29.000 --> 0:27:32.200
<v Speaker 2>so I'm like, if you're not welcoming, I don't know

0:27:32.280 --> 0:27:33.919
<v Speaker 2>what you want me to do to just say, look

0:27:33.960 --> 0:27:35.080
<v Speaker 2>like boo boo the fool when I.

0:27:35.280 --> 0:27:37.000
<v Speaker 1>Have right and listen to your stories.

0:27:38.680 --> 0:27:42.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, very tough, like when you when you have to

0:27:42.400 --> 0:27:45.280
<v Speaker 2>kind of and be like, no, I'm not checking for them,

0:27:45.359 --> 0:27:48.160
<v Speaker 2>but like also I prefer this conversation, but like calm down,

0:27:48.359 --> 0:27:49.280
<v Speaker 2>but like you know.

0:27:49.760 --> 0:27:50.440
<v Speaker 1>It's so sunny.

0:27:50.480 --> 0:27:53.680
<v Speaker 4>You bring that up because that's such a typical Zimbabewe

0:27:53.880 --> 0:27:56.440
<v Speaker 4>and set up like you go for a bride or

0:27:56.520 --> 0:27:57.520
<v Speaker 4>you go for for.

0:27:57.600 --> 0:27:59.520
<v Speaker 1>Those who don't know what a bride is, by season five,

0:28:00.040 --> 0:28:01.239
<v Speaker 1>a barbecue.

0:28:02.760 --> 0:28:05.400
<v Speaker 4>And then like you know, the men would be outside

0:28:05.440 --> 0:28:09.000
<v Speaker 4>with the typically with the beers and with the with

0:28:09.160 --> 0:28:11.399
<v Speaker 4>the meat, and the ladies are doing the sides in

0:28:11.520 --> 0:28:13.760
<v Speaker 4>the kitchen and then you all congregate when the.

0:28:13.760 --> 0:28:17.440
<v Speaker 1>Food is ready to eat. But it's like you're you

0:28:17.560 --> 0:28:19.000
<v Speaker 1>walk in and you go to your separate way.

0:28:19.200 --> 0:28:21.879
<v Speaker 4>So when you're not homies with the girls, it's like

0:28:22.000 --> 0:28:23.760
<v Speaker 4>oh hiy, the never look at you up and down.

0:28:23.960 --> 0:28:25.760
<v Speaker 4>Yeah that girl who's friends with money.

0:28:25.920 --> 0:28:28.480
<v Speaker 2>Yeah absolutely, or like checking out what you're wearing. But

0:28:28.600 --> 0:28:30.359
<v Speaker 2>even if you think about it from a family, because

0:28:30.400 --> 0:28:33.320
<v Speaker 2>we likened friendship to like a brother, a cousin or ever,

0:28:33.960 --> 0:28:36.480
<v Speaker 2>if I think of family events, sometimes I just want

0:28:36.480 --> 0:28:38.520
<v Speaker 2>to hang out with my god cousins, Like it's right,

0:28:39.080 --> 0:28:39.760
<v Speaker 2>do you understand?

0:28:39.840 --> 0:28:41.000
<v Speaker 1>Like so if you think of it.

0:28:41.080 --> 0:28:44.840
<v Speaker 2>In that context, it makes sense, but people don't always

0:28:44.880 --> 0:28:46.720
<v Speaker 2>read it in the same language. I don't know.

0:28:47.720 --> 0:28:49.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, I mean to be fair.

0:28:49.840 --> 0:28:53.480
<v Speaker 4>Also, when you go out with guys who are your friends,

0:28:53.520 --> 0:28:55.880
<v Speaker 4>they can block you as well. It ain't gonna always

0:28:55.880 --> 0:28:58.520
<v Speaker 4>be rosy because it looks like you must you're you're

0:28:58.600 --> 0:28:59.480
<v Speaker 4>rolling five deep.

0:28:59.600 --> 0:29:04.479
<v Speaker 3>You must have one of them. I don't know them,

0:29:04.560 --> 0:29:09.240
<v Speaker 3>must be your man, you know so. But our guys

0:29:09.360 --> 0:29:11.040
<v Speaker 3>good are they good guys?

0:29:11.120 --> 0:29:11.760
<v Speaker 2>Good wingmen?

0:29:12.320 --> 0:29:12.360
<v Speaker 3>No?

0:29:12.840 --> 0:29:17.200
<v Speaker 1>No, are terrible. I tell you, came with the guy

0:29:17.400 --> 0:29:19.080
<v Speaker 1>was the happliest guy in the club.

0:29:21.040 --> 0:29:24.000
<v Speaker 4>We're good, we're good wing women for them, and they're

0:29:24.080 --> 0:29:25.280
<v Speaker 4>horrible wingmen for.

0:29:25.440 --> 0:29:27.920
<v Speaker 2>And then they get this protected big brother and relax.

0:29:28.240 --> 0:29:31.840
<v Speaker 4>I want to want you help me enter and they're like,

0:29:33.120 --> 0:29:36.960
<v Speaker 4>don't come and now give your don't wait, I must say.

0:29:37.000 --> 0:29:39.400
<v Speaker 2>They get protected like that big brother energy, and you're like,

0:29:39.800 --> 0:29:40.560
<v Speaker 2>what I signed up for?

0:29:40.880 --> 0:29:44.880
<v Speaker 4>Like, actually, yeah, I found that the relationships with my

0:29:45.000 --> 0:29:47.760
<v Speaker 4>friends male friends that have gone well with people I

0:29:47.840 --> 0:29:50.880
<v Speaker 4>was dating, and people I dated were guys I met separately.

0:29:51.280 --> 0:29:53.760
<v Speaker 1>Then I bought them into the fold meeting at the

0:29:53.840 --> 0:29:56.480
<v Speaker 1>same time. And the guy and then my friends.

0:29:57.360 --> 0:30:02.520
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, no, no, no, like literally blocked one of us.

0:30:02.600 --> 0:30:04.800
<v Speaker 2>Let's go, and you're like, yeah, yeah.

0:30:05.840 --> 0:30:07.640
<v Speaker 1>That dude you never put his arm around you, like,

0:30:07.760 --> 0:30:11.520
<v Speaker 1>you know, my guy's opting.

0:30:12.680 --> 0:30:15.800
<v Speaker 2>So that's just warnering if you want paternally friendships and

0:30:15.920 --> 0:30:19.160
<v Speaker 2>you single trying to you know, sometimes coup blocks like

0:30:19.440 --> 0:30:21.040
<v Speaker 2>the interfere.

0:30:20.560 --> 0:30:21.360
<v Speaker 1>With the plan.

0:30:22.120 --> 0:30:25.240
<v Speaker 4>Meanwhile, we'd be working hard to waming for them, yes

0:30:25.920 --> 0:30:26.760
<v Speaker 4>and being nice.

0:30:26.600 --> 0:30:28.440
<v Speaker 1>And like, oh you look so pretty, Oh you look

0:30:28.480 --> 0:30:31.080
<v Speaker 1>so pretty, Like yeah, have you met my hommie?

0:30:31.320 --> 0:30:34.040
<v Speaker 2>Like, you know, my friend putting in a good word,

0:30:34.120 --> 0:30:36.880
<v Speaker 2>and guys love, they love to be like he's putting

0:30:36.880 --> 0:30:39.320
<v Speaker 2>a good word. Who's your homie? Can you er for me?

0:30:41.080 --> 0:30:41.600
<v Speaker 1>Meanwhile?

0:30:41.960 --> 0:30:46.400
<v Speaker 4>Mean block talking about that, Do you think it's okay

0:30:46.560 --> 0:30:48.240
<v Speaker 4>for your partner to have lots of friends of the

0:30:48.240 --> 0:30:49.000
<v Speaker 4>opposite sex?

0:30:50.320 --> 0:30:53.480
<v Speaker 2>What lots of friends? It's all like subjective, right.

0:30:53.640 --> 0:30:58.080
<v Speaker 4>Like yeah, I guess, I guess an amount that maybe

0:30:58.200 --> 0:31:01.320
<v Speaker 4>you have, like more than when you would have whatever

0:31:01.440 --> 0:31:03.600
<v Speaker 4>that whatever that would be, or like you know, you

0:31:03.680 --> 0:31:06.920
<v Speaker 4>brought up may this spile of the thickest she obviously,

0:31:07.080 --> 0:31:09.800
<v Speaker 4>but they were besties and then he then got into

0:31:09.840 --> 0:31:12.960
<v Speaker 4>a relationship. Yeah, and she we didn't see her life

0:31:12.960 --> 0:31:17.200
<v Speaker 4>but let's just say she didn't have any male nor friends. Yeah,

0:31:17.360 --> 0:31:19.160
<v Speaker 4>and then she sees but my man and my new

0:31:19.240 --> 0:31:21.240
<v Speaker 4>man has a bestie who's a female.

0:31:21.360 --> 0:31:23.880
<v Speaker 1>Like that energy? What are you saying?

0:31:24.040 --> 0:31:27.360
<v Speaker 2>I just it depends on what energy you're getting from

0:31:27.640 --> 0:31:31.479
<v Speaker 2>that person, because sometimes people become protective of their friend, right,

0:31:31.760 --> 0:31:33.720
<v Speaker 2>and it's kind of like who's in the relationship here

0:31:33.840 --> 0:31:37.040
<v Speaker 2>like me, and then more like it gets tricky. I

0:31:37.200 --> 0:31:39.640
<v Speaker 2>think I would like to say, if he did have

0:31:40.000 --> 0:31:45.440
<v Speaker 2>a lot of more female friends, I would like to

0:31:45.560 --> 0:31:48.960
<v Speaker 2>think that he still confides in me too. Like I

0:31:49.000 --> 0:31:52.000
<v Speaker 2>think what hurts a lot of people is where it's

0:31:52.040 --> 0:31:54.400
<v Speaker 2>like you go tell them everything and I'm just like

0:31:54.600 --> 0:31:55.840
<v Speaker 2>on the I'm just your.

0:31:55.960 --> 0:32:00.360
<v Speaker 1>Outskirts on the out periphery. But that happens with female

0:32:00.440 --> 0:32:02.120
<v Speaker 1>female that's friendships.

0:32:02.320 --> 0:32:02.800
<v Speaker 2>That's true.

0:32:03.600 --> 0:32:05.280
<v Speaker 1>So we like doing a double standard.

0:32:05.640 --> 0:32:08.600
<v Speaker 2>But it's a double standard because like men don't get

0:32:08.680 --> 0:32:11.920
<v Speaker 2>certain things about a female friend. Like we laugh and

0:32:12.000 --> 0:32:15.200
<v Speaker 2>joke about this, Like me, I'm always if anything happens

0:32:15.240 --> 0:32:18.080
<v Speaker 2>black golden girls we live together, don't we'll find the house.

0:32:18.920 --> 0:32:20.760
<v Speaker 1>I buy a house with you, Yeah.

0:32:20.880 --> 0:32:24.560
<v Speaker 2>Exactly, Like because it's just like you understand the world

0:32:25.880 --> 0:32:29.000
<v Speaker 2>differently and the things I share with you, most of

0:32:29.080 --> 0:32:32.160
<v Speaker 2>the I share with my husband, you know, but his

0:32:32.320 --> 0:32:34.520
<v Speaker 2>perspective sometimes just like I was looking for a bit

0:32:34.680 --> 0:32:36.320
<v Speaker 2>more energy on this topic.

0:32:36.480 --> 0:32:40.440
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, I can me dialve into Yeah, when they're.

0:32:40.240 --> 0:32:43.040
<v Speaker 2>Not very practical, they just like, I mean, just don't

0:32:43.080 --> 0:32:44.800
<v Speaker 2>talk to her, and you're like, yeah, but like it

0:32:44.920 --> 0:32:47.320
<v Speaker 2>hurt me, you know what type of thing. Yeah, yeah,

0:32:48.320 --> 0:32:51.520
<v Speaker 2>So the space is different when it's a male friendship

0:32:51.680 --> 0:32:55.840
<v Speaker 2>than a female one. So there's kind of that. And

0:32:55.960 --> 0:32:59.080
<v Speaker 2>also like you know, if he makes your priority, that's dope,

0:32:59.160 --> 0:33:01.160
<v Speaker 2>but when they're now don't make you a priority, then

0:33:01.960 --> 0:33:05.200
<v Speaker 2>I don't know that that's yeah, I don't know how

0:33:05.280 --> 0:33:05.720
<v Speaker 2>you see it.

0:33:06.480 --> 0:33:07.280
<v Speaker 1>I think it's so.

0:33:09.520 --> 0:33:12.400
<v Speaker 4>It depends its case by case for me, because it

0:33:12.440 --> 0:33:14.600
<v Speaker 4>also depends if your man is up in the streets

0:33:14.680 --> 0:33:18.040
<v Speaker 4>and you want to be chilling at home and then

0:33:18.120 --> 0:33:20.480
<v Speaker 4>he goes out and he so happens to have a

0:33:20.520 --> 0:33:22.800
<v Speaker 4>lot of female friends and they're getting drunk together and

0:33:22.840 --> 0:33:25.000
<v Speaker 4>they're getting and we all know you do silly things

0:33:25.040 --> 0:33:27.000
<v Speaker 4>when alcohol is involved.

0:33:26.640 --> 0:33:28.840
<v Speaker 1>And if it's repeatedly, like every Friday.

0:33:29.160 --> 0:33:32.160
<v Speaker 4>So it's like it just depends on the energy on

0:33:32.240 --> 0:33:38.160
<v Speaker 4>the situations I tend luckily obviously with my husband attract

0:33:38.280 --> 0:33:41.080
<v Speaker 4>men who don't have lots of girlfriends. I've never really

0:33:41.240 --> 0:33:46.360
<v Speaker 4>had that one on one experience of it. But I

0:33:46.440 --> 0:33:49.360
<v Speaker 4>also it also depends for me on the friends the

0:33:49.440 --> 0:33:53.480
<v Speaker 4>girlfriend's intentions, you know, like if they think they're waiting

0:33:53.520 --> 0:33:56.240
<v Speaker 4>in line, thinking I wait by the sidelines one day

0:33:56.280 --> 0:33:59.080
<v Speaker 4>it'll be over with this chick, and you get that energy,

0:33:59.440 --> 0:34:00.480
<v Speaker 4>then it be hard.

0:34:00.800 --> 0:34:02.240
<v Speaker 1>But if they have pure.

0:34:02.200 --> 0:34:06.760
<v Speaker 4>Stands for our friendship for love, then okay, then I

0:34:06.760 --> 0:34:08.680
<v Speaker 4>actually feel like, okay, I got an inside man in

0:34:08.760 --> 0:34:12.160
<v Speaker 4>a way, you know. So it really depends and and

0:34:12.320 --> 0:34:14.600
<v Speaker 4>people think they're good at hiding these kinds of things,

0:34:14.640 --> 0:34:16.919
<v Speaker 4>but we know, yeah, no, we know a girl who's

0:34:16.960 --> 0:34:19.759
<v Speaker 4>after your man very and we not a girl who's just.

0:34:19.840 --> 0:34:21.640
<v Speaker 1>There to be a friend. We know the difference.

0:34:21.680 --> 0:34:24.440
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, so when you get the vibes, that's when the

0:34:24.520 --> 0:34:28.280
<v Speaker 4>reactions they are differently For me for sure, Yeah.

0:34:28.239 --> 0:34:30.719
<v Speaker 2>I have three one thousand percent like it. It's really

0:34:31.960 --> 0:34:34.399
<v Speaker 2>so I think that's the thing. It's like, what does

0:34:34.480 --> 0:34:37.440
<v Speaker 2>it mean? And and similar to you, you know, my

0:34:37.560 --> 0:34:40.640
<v Speaker 2>husband doesn't have a lot of like female friends, like

0:34:40.719 --> 0:34:42.600
<v Speaker 2>so I can't really say like, but I was just

0:34:42.719 --> 0:34:46.040
<v Speaker 2>like befriend them, like you said, like hopefully they can

0:34:46.120 --> 0:34:48.320
<v Speaker 2>hold enough space for us to be friends too, like

0:34:48.480 --> 0:34:54.560
<v Speaker 2>to be in it. And so I'm so it's.

0:34:53.320 --> 0:34:55.560
<v Speaker 1>Layered, young, it's a layered one.

0:34:56.080 --> 0:34:59.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's totally lay Yeah, yeah, yeah, but I think, yeah,

0:34:59.640 --> 0:35:02.239
<v Speaker 2>I think we touched on some of the benefit. What

0:35:02.400 --> 0:35:06.040
<v Speaker 2>are the benefits of your partner having more girlfriends than.

0:35:07.280 --> 0:35:09.439
<v Speaker 1>I guess you know what to give you child?

0:35:09.800 --> 0:35:11.280
<v Speaker 2>That's true sometimes.

0:35:12.960 --> 0:35:19.680
<v Speaker 4>Sure, if she's not a okay, we're assuming the friend

0:35:19.800 --> 0:35:24.120
<v Speaker 4>is of sound mind, sound mine, and there's a stand

0:35:24.280 --> 0:35:28.120
<v Speaker 4>of your laf Obviously she's like having, as I said,

0:35:28.120 --> 0:35:30.960
<v Speaker 4>an inside man. So that would be good, even inside

0:35:31.000 --> 0:35:33.760
<v Speaker 4>man to his thoughts because maybe coming from a fellow

0:35:34.239 --> 0:35:37.160
<v Speaker 4>depends on how you say it. Obviously it might be

0:35:37.320 --> 0:35:39.520
<v Speaker 4>nice to get out. Maybe he's thinking this in a

0:35:39.600 --> 0:35:42.040
<v Speaker 4>gentle way, not not enough. He told me this, and

0:35:42.120 --> 0:35:44.400
<v Speaker 4>he told me that, And that also then creates a

0:35:44.480 --> 0:35:46.479
<v Speaker 4>divide because it's like, oh, he tells you all these things.

0:35:48.440 --> 0:35:48.680
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:35:48.960 --> 0:35:53.800
<v Speaker 4>For me, the drawbacks are what you said, like not

0:35:54.000 --> 0:35:57.080
<v Speaker 4>having a community, sense of community, because boys don't really

0:35:57.239 --> 0:35:59.400
<v Speaker 4>roll like that. They're more I mean, you have your

0:35:59.440 --> 0:36:01.320
<v Speaker 4>group of friends, but it's not like the way it

0:36:01.400 --> 0:36:04.800
<v Speaker 4>feels like ladies with branch or going to the spa,

0:36:05.239 --> 0:36:08.600
<v Speaker 4>or we're very communal women and men are more like

0:36:08.800 --> 0:36:12.720
<v Speaker 4>lone wolfish, you know. So I think for me, obviously,

0:36:12.800 --> 0:36:16.279
<v Speaker 4>being a female, I do appreciate I also like having

0:36:16.320 --> 0:36:18.840
<v Speaker 4>my girls around me and that support. Like things like

0:36:18.920 --> 0:36:22.520
<v Speaker 4>planning a wedding or planning a baby with a male friend.

0:36:22.880 --> 0:36:23.800
<v Speaker 2>They'll be like, you want me to go?

0:36:23.960 --> 0:36:28.080
<v Speaker 4>What they'll be like and even just a mental load

0:36:28.400 --> 0:36:31.960
<v Speaker 4>before the event, talking about a color scheme. They'll be

0:36:32.040 --> 0:36:36.120
<v Speaker 4>like my guy Canada. This is obviously mainly a generalization

0:36:36.320 --> 0:36:40.520
<v Speaker 4>on sexual men. They will be like, just choose. You know,

0:36:41.160 --> 0:36:42.280
<v Speaker 4>you want to delve into.

0:36:42.600 --> 0:36:46.640
<v Speaker 1>Salmon things, can equity, you know you want to go

0:36:46.760 --> 0:36:49.799
<v Speaker 1>into all the things I think happen.

0:36:49.920 --> 0:36:52.800
<v Speaker 2>When when the groom himself is just like you choose,

0:36:53.000 --> 0:36:57.200
<v Speaker 2>I mean yeah, like b it's not yeah, it's not even.

0:36:57.120 --> 0:36:58.840
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so I feel like you need a balance.

0:36:59.000 --> 0:37:05.920
<v Speaker 2>Yeah I can't imagine being colourways like I mean, okay, totally.

0:37:06.040 --> 0:37:14.320
<v Speaker 1>Well, they'll be like what you got to be explaining everything.

0:37:16.280 --> 0:37:20.160
<v Speaker 2>Unless they're into that, like unless they have that Yeah, yeah,

0:37:21.360 --> 0:37:24.080
<v Speaker 2>we're generalizing you. Sorry, you don't get offended.

0:37:23.840 --> 0:37:26.920
<v Speaker 4>But we're just saying, yeah, please don't get offended if

0:37:26.920 --> 0:37:30.640
<v Speaker 4>you think you don't know what colourways? Do you think though,

0:37:30.760 --> 0:37:34.480
<v Speaker 4>that platonic friendships also depend on personality type or your

0:37:34.560 --> 0:37:38.600
<v Speaker 4>own experiences and therefore, like if you've had a friend

0:37:38.680 --> 0:37:40.560
<v Speaker 4>that crossed the line with you, then that's why you're

0:37:40.560 --> 0:37:42.759
<v Speaker 4>a bit suspicious of them, Like you know, do you

0:37:42.880 --> 0:37:46.120
<v Speaker 4>think it's as a result of that how your platonic

0:37:46.160 --> 0:37:46.719
<v Speaker 4>friendships go.

0:37:47.160 --> 0:37:51.320
<v Speaker 2>Absolutely. I think everything we do is from experience and

0:37:51.680 --> 0:37:57.520
<v Speaker 2>from how we've seen things happen in our lives. How

0:37:57.640 --> 0:38:00.160
<v Speaker 2>we feel, do we feel safe, do we feel we

0:38:00.239 --> 0:38:03.319
<v Speaker 2>can trust? Do we feel And I think I will

0:38:03.360 --> 0:38:05.480
<v Speaker 2>say this, I think it's okay for people to realize

0:38:05.520 --> 0:38:09.400
<v Speaker 2>it's okay if platonic friendships are not for you. Just

0:38:09.560 --> 0:38:11.520
<v Speaker 2>like I don't know how to explain it, like it's

0:38:12.040 --> 0:38:15.000
<v Speaker 2>it's it doesn't mean you're less of a woman. Yeah,

0:38:15.920 --> 0:38:18.160
<v Speaker 2>but I think people feel like, oh, if I'm a

0:38:18.200 --> 0:38:20.000
<v Speaker 2>balanced person, I need to have X Y. But I

0:38:20.080 --> 0:38:22.840
<v Speaker 2>think everything is influenced from your upbringing. So if you

0:38:22.880 --> 0:38:24.840
<v Speaker 2>feel safe, like I was saying, like, I just have

0:38:25.080 --> 0:38:29.000
<v Speaker 2>always felt safer with women in terms of my inner

0:38:29.120 --> 0:38:33.840
<v Speaker 2>intimate circle. But that's by virtue of my own personal experiences.

0:38:35.080 --> 0:38:38.160
<v Speaker 2>I do think it definitely depends if you feel like

0:38:38.800 --> 0:38:42.400
<v Speaker 2>you are able to engage just purely on the basis

0:38:42.440 --> 0:38:46.239
<v Speaker 2>of like there's the homie and there's nothing there. I think,

0:38:47.320 --> 0:38:50.160
<v Speaker 2>as Amanda already said, how you met, how you came

0:38:50.239 --> 0:38:53.720
<v Speaker 2>to be friends and their levels to friendship. Hey, there's friendship.

0:38:53.920 --> 0:38:57.960
<v Speaker 2>Like you know, we talk often and we unpack like

0:38:58.120 --> 0:39:01.320
<v Speaker 2>life's meaning in this friendships of life, Brah, let's go,

0:39:01.680 --> 0:39:05.160
<v Speaker 2>let's go, hang, let's go, you know, the common interest

0:39:05.360 --> 0:39:11.120
<v Speaker 2>common So they're definitely different layers. What I will say though,

0:39:11.560 --> 0:39:16.040
<v Speaker 2>where I kind of say it's questionable if you, as

0:39:16.120 --> 0:39:19.200
<v Speaker 2>a female are not able to have female friends. That's

0:39:19.239 --> 0:39:19.960
<v Speaker 2>how I feel.

0:39:20.080 --> 0:39:23.200
<v Speaker 4>But like versa, if I met do you didn't have

0:39:23.320 --> 0:39:27.400
<v Speaker 4>any male friends and all of them girls, I would also.

0:39:27.239 --> 0:39:30.200
<v Speaker 2>Be That's why I think it's because it's it's it's

0:39:30.680 --> 0:39:33.399
<v Speaker 2>it's it's kind of saying, how do you perceive even

0:39:33.480 --> 0:39:36.839
<v Speaker 2>yourself in a way, And there's a whole we could

0:39:36.960 --> 0:39:38.919
<v Speaker 2>go on a whole tangent of that, but in terms

0:39:38.920 --> 0:39:42.200
<v Speaker 2>of platonic friendship, definitely personality type and what you want

0:39:42.320 --> 0:39:44.560
<v Speaker 2>and what you need and sometimes you don't need that

0:39:44.680 --> 0:39:46.799
<v Speaker 2>male perspective or maybe.

0:39:47.000 --> 0:39:50.839
<v Speaker 4>And what's available to you, you know, like if you're

0:39:50.880 --> 0:39:52.920
<v Speaker 4>not around a lot of people love a certain gender,

0:39:53.000 --> 0:39:55.160
<v Speaker 4>male or female, then maybe that it's going to be

0:39:55.200 --> 0:39:56.719
<v Speaker 4>as a product of you know.

0:39:57.040 --> 0:40:00.239
<v Speaker 1>So it also defends the spaces you're occupying.

0:40:01.480 --> 0:40:01.879
<v Speaker 2>For sure.

0:40:02.360 --> 0:40:06.360
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's such a I mean, friendships.

0:40:05.920 --> 0:40:08.160
<v Speaker 4>Is always a late thing, and I think people always

0:40:08.239 --> 0:40:11.320
<v Speaker 4>concentrate on romance so much, like even you know, you

0:40:11.360 --> 0:40:13.400
<v Speaker 4>were talking about all these movies that I've come up

0:40:13.520 --> 0:40:16.080
<v Speaker 4>rom coms, and but I feel like friendships are the

0:40:16.160 --> 0:40:18.759
<v Speaker 4>things that sustain us from like when we were so young,

0:40:19.080 --> 0:40:24.520
<v Speaker 4>when we're so old, and the journey of friendships, you know.

0:40:24.840 --> 0:40:26.400
<v Speaker 1>So it's so funny, Like it's just.

0:40:28.560 --> 0:40:30.040
<v Speaker 4>I guess we just want to do one for the

0:40:30.120 --> 0:40:32.840
<v Speaker 4>Fellers to be like, Yeah, obviously we've talked about sisterhood

0:40:32.880 --> 0:40:35.640
<v Speaker 4>a lot, and we're keen on this season to talk

0:40:35.680 --> 0:40:38.880
<v Speaker 4>about sisterhood, but we're also like we do recognize there

0:40:38.920 --> 0:40:39.239
<v Speaker 4>are some.

0:40:39.360 --> 0:40:40.239
<v Speaker 1>Good men out there.

0:40:40.800 --> 0:40:44.040
<v Speaker 4>We're also holding their sisters up, you know, and giving

0:40:44.120 --> 0:40:48.560
<v Speaker 4>them support and giving them perspective and hopefully gaining the

0:40:48.680 --> 0:40:49.319
<v Speaker 4>same back.

0:40:49.840 --> 0:40:54.280
<v Speaker 2>Absolutely, and I think that that's what makes good platonic friendships?

0:40:54.280 --> 0:40:56.839
<v Speaker 2>Are you an ally? Are you supporting? Are you willing

0:40:56.920 --> 0:40:58.800
<v Speaker 2>to learn? Are you you know? Those things? And we

0:40:59.000 --> 0:41:02.080
<v Speaker 2>need it because sometimes when you say a woman to

0:41:02.120 --> 0:41:05.440
<v Speaker 2>a man, like don't do that because it's disrespect me

0:41:05.560 --> 0:41:08.040
<v Speaker 2>as a woman, or ever, they don't hear it, but

0:41:08.160 --> 0:41:10.239
<v Speaker 2>hearing it from another day, like, oh, you shouldn't do

0:41:10.320 --> 0:41:13.200
<v Speaker 2>that because like women, you know, do you understand what

0:41:13.200 --> 0:41:17.000
<v Speaker 2>I'm saying? Like, yeah, definitely beneficial for standing in the gap,

0:41:17.440 --> 0:41:21.200
<v Speaker 2>but yeah, I haven't you guys like enjoyed us kind

0:41:21.239 --> 0:41:24.160
<v Speaker 2>of trying to break it down and you know, coming

0:41:24.280 --> 0:41:29.440
<v Speaker 2>back to this podcast life, Yes, exactly. So what can

0:41:29.520 --> 0:41:33.640
<v Speaker 2>we expect for season? I wan's say season two season.

0:41:33.560 --> 0:41:35.840
<v Speaker 1>Girl, We're done done? Season two.

0:41:38.200 --> 0:41:44.520
<v Speaker 4>Type of five I'm losing track can explain. We can

0:41:44.640 --> 0:41:49.480
<v Speaker 4>expect a lot of celebration of black women, specifically black

0:41:49.800 --> 0:41:53.759
<v Speaker 4>Zimbabwean women. Brimby and I both watch the Bobby movie

0:41:53.840 --> 0:41:55.640
<v Speaker 4>and say what you want to say, but we were

0:41:55.680 --> 0:42:01.200
<v Speaker 4>in our fields about you know, about sisterhood, fellow our

0:42:01.280 --> 0:42:02.399
<v Speaker 4>fellow Bobby's out.

0:42:02.480 --> 0:42:04.799
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, you know there was President Bobby, like.

0:42:07.680 --> 0:42:10.960
<v Speaker 4>You know, so like it's just I love that it

0:42:11.120 --> 0:42:14.040
<v Speaker 4>celebrates us, all those individuals and all our different ways,

0:42:14.160 --> 0:42:17.520
<v Speaker 4>and this season we're really taking a moment. You know,

0:42:17.640 --> 0:42:21.279
<v Speaker 4>even if you see our logos pink pink, Bobby Future pink,

0:42:21.400 --> 0:42:21.799
<v Speaker 4>and it's like.

0:42:23.320 --> 0:42:27.360
<v Speaker 1>Yays Era, just we don't get.

0:42:28.760 --> 0:42:32.920
<v Speaker 4>It's such a layered gender and it's be beautiful that

0:42:33.040 --> 0:42:36.400
<v Speaker 4>this season will get to spotlight our own thoughts on

0:42:36.560 --> 0:42:40.120
<v Speaker 4>things as black women, but also spotlight some very exciting

0:42:40.239 --> 0:42:43.120
<v Speaker 4>guests for our beautiful season.

0:42:43.600 --> 0:42:46.120
<v Speaker 2>Absolutely. Yeah. Every time I hear buy, I want to

0:42:46.160 --> 0:42:49.600
<v Speaker 2>say Bartie, but that's yeah, that's what's her name, Cardi.

0:42:49.400 --> 0:42:52.520
<v Speaker 1>B Right's Cardi B I think Bobby.

0:42:53.800 --> 0:42:53.920
<v Speaker 3>Ni.

0:42:54.640 --> 0:42:57.680
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's true, that's true. I do like the remix

0:42:57.760 --> 0:42:58.719
<v Speaker 2>to Bobby Girl.

0:42:59.200 --> 0:43:04.600
<v Speaker 1>No no, no, no, yeah I do. I do like

0:43:04.680 --> 0:43:05.000
<v Speaker 1>it too.

0:43:05.120 --> 0:43:08.279
<v Speaker 4>And even there's even that sad song with Billie Eilish like,

0:43:08.480 --> 0:43:09.320
<v Speaker 4>yeah I heard it.

0:43:09.960 --> 0:43:11.480
<v Speaker 1>What have I made for or something?

0:43:11.640 --> 0:43:11.839
<v Speaker 2>Yeah?

0:43:13.920 --> 0:43:17.160
<v Speaker 1>Anyway, what's that zim shower room bee for today?

0:43:17.600 --> 0:43:20.560
<v Speaker 2>Well, actually thinking about women, but it's in your hood,

0:43:20.800 --> 0:43:24.279
<v Speaker 2>somebody in your hood, your territory. Our shout out is

0:43:24.400 --> 0:43:26.160
<v Speaker 2>routend or M. I actually don't know what the M

0:43:26.280 --> 0:43:30.840
<v Speaker 2>stands for. She was on Master Chef of Australia and

0:43:31.200 --> 0:43:35.640
<v Speaker 2>she won the Source Challenge. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

0:43:35.719 --> 0:43:38.400
<v Speaker 1>She had to have a source in like a in

0:43:38.480 --> 0:43:41.360
<v Speaker 1>a grocery, a major grocery called Calls.

0:43:41.560 --> 0:43:48.359
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, nationwide Barbarus sauce. It was really cool that. Yeah,

0:43:49.600 --> 0:43:52.360
<v Speaker 2>you know what, you know, as black people, we like flavor.

0:43:52.480 --> 0:43:53.440
<v Speaker 2>So she's just like.

0:43:55.320 --> 0:43:58.279
<v Speaker 1>She was like the name because like, I've been doing

0:43:58.400 --> 0:44:00.799
<v Speaker 1>this since I started cooking, what do you mean?

0:44:01.560 --> 0:44:04.400
<v Speaker 4>So yeah, it's nice to see a fellow and you know,

0:44:04.760 --> 0:44:07.600
<v Speaker 4>just her journey obviously becoming and I think she was

0:44:07.719 --> 0:44:09.320
<v Speaker 4>like if she was not in, she was in the

0:44:09.320 --> 0:44:10.279
<v Speaker 4>top ten for sure.

0:44:10.680 --> 0:44:12.640
<v Speaker 1>I remember at which point she got eliminated.

0:44:12.760 --> 0:44:17.600
<v Speaker 4>But her, I mean, such a big consolation prize, right

0:44:17.800 --> 0:44:20.919
<v Speaker 4>to have your source sold nationwide people.

0:44:21.520 --> 0:44:24.040
<v Speaker 1>I bought like six bottles. I started gifting the people

0:44:24.080 --> 0:44:24.680
<v Speaker 1>at work.

0:44:24.840 --> 0:44:27.960
<v Speaker 2>Because I was like, yes, let them know. Let them know.

0:44:28.880 --> 0:44:33.880
<v Speaker 4>So shout out to Route. Her instagram is at routendome

0:44:34.680 --> 0:44:35.800
<v Speaker 4>no M.

0:44:36.000 --> 0:44:40.480
<v Speaker 2>Yeah are you you e t N d O M.

0:44:40.920 --> 0:44:44.680
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. I think she calls us half rue like the kangaroo, yes.

0:44:44.800 --> 0:44:49.920
<v Speaker 2>Because Australian people don't know how to ruh or you know,

0:44:50.120 --> 0:44:50.560
<v Speaker 2>I get that.

0:44:51.080 --> 0:44:55.200
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, So shout out to her. Yeah, well then, and.

0:44:55.560 --> 0:44:57.719
<v Speaker 2>Thank you guys for joining us season five. I know

0:44:57.840 --> 0:45:01.640
<v Speaker 2>some people are like when you're coming back back back

0:45:01.960 --> 0:45:03.919
<v Speaker 2>as always, as I say it, like a bad rush.

0:45:05.280 --> 0:45:09.320
<v Speaker 1>We don't like it, but we accept.

0:45:09.600 --> 0:45:13.200
<v Speaker 2>Who don't stop me now? You can't help me now,

0:45:14.640 --> 0:45:18.279
<v Speaker 2>but I won't start now sometimes Season five, y'all now,

0:45:18.480 --> 0:45:20.600
<v Speaker 2>just yeah exactly. I just want my diddy energy.

0:45:20.719 --> 0:45:25.120
<v Speaker 4>I wish I had that man, no question dances that

0:45:25.239 --> 0:45:29.879
<v Speaker 4>didn't shake. You can hate me, but I won't stand

0:45:29.920 --> 0:45:30.319
<v Speaker 4>up time.

0:45:30.400 --> 0:45:33.080
<v Speaker 2>But like, but who're gonna tell him to stop?

0:45:33.200 --> 0:45:36.480
<v Speaker 1>Gonna tell the We're gonna tell nobody exactly.

0:45:36.880 --> 0:45:39.239
<v Speaker 2>Thank you so much. As always, you can hit us up.

0:45:39.640 --> 0:45:44.760
<v Speaker 2>We are on Instagram, it's layered on x It's layered

0:45:44.880 --> 0:45:49.399
<v Speaker 2>pod on TikTok, It's laid pod. Email us, it's lead

0:45:49.520 --> 0:45:53.839
<v Speaker 2>pod at gmail dot com. We love you guys. Thank

0:45:53.920 --> 0:45:56.960
<v Speaker 2>you so much for always writing with us. They do

0:45:57.120 --> 0:46:00.360
<v Speaker 2>need to die, but we keep writing. I'll see you

0:46:00.440 --> 0:46:01.440
<v Speaker 2>guys on the next.

0:46:02.239 --> 0:46:03.600
<v Speaker 1>Hope you enjoyed this season.

0:46:03.960 --> 0:46:10.120
<v Speaker 2>Bye, yes bye no no no, yeah yeah yeah yeah