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Speaker 1: Jonesy and Amanda in the morning.

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Speaker 2: Sam with lots of.

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Speaker 3: People having Zoom meetings for work but also socially. I've

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Speaker 3: had book club over Zoom and one afternoon, just a

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Speaker 3: group of us thought we haven't seen each other for ages,

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Speaker 3: had a glass of wine and a Zoom catch up.

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Speaker 3: And part of the fun is if you see someone's

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Speaker 3: cat walking past door, you know, you see a snippet

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Speaker 3: of their lives, you think, oh, was that a new

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Speaker 3: teapot you've got in the background.

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Speaker 4: That's my husband looked me in the nude.

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Speaker 3: It's all the domestic details are all fun to see

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Speaker 3: in people's houses. Well, this woman, though, was having a

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Speaker 3: catch up with some friends having some veno. I think

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Speaker 3: they're having card games, I think. And a seagull, a

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Speaker 3: really big, fat seagull, flew into a house. She said

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Speaker 3: they'd all had some drinks so they were going mad,

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Speaker 3: screaming get it out, so she chased it around for

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Speaker 3: a while. The seagull looked like it was going to

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Speaker 3: head out through the door, turned back around, landed on

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Speaker 3: the counter, and didn't do a pooh, which is where

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Speaker 3: you think this story might be going. Did a really

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Speaker 3: enormous vomit all over the kitchen counter. She said it

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Speaker 3: was like gloopy rice and took more than five minutes

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Speaker 3: to clear up.

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Speaker 1: Could have been delivering food, because that's what birds do, isn't.

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Speaker 4: It to they're young.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe when they hurt them go, they thought, oh,

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Speaker 2: they're birds.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to offer some snacks.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, well that's a very generous offer. That's a very

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Speaker 3: kind way of looking at this bird's behavior. But you know,

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Speaker 3: actually I used to work with a woman who was

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Speaker 3: terrified of birds. If we ever had a segment on

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Speaker 3: the TV show where where a bird was involved, even

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Speaker 3: if it was a chicken in a pen, she couldn't

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Speaker 3: be there. She was so freaked out by birds she

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Speaker 3: had to disappear.

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Speaker 1: We live in Australia, we're riven with birds.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it doesn't mean that you can't have a phobia

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Speaker 3: about something. You heard before that on the show that

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Speaker 3: Nicole Kimman doesn't like butterflies or has a phobia about them.

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Speaker 3: She lives in Australia where we have butterflies. Doesn't stop

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Speaker 3: you having some ancient throwback phobia.

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Speaker 1: Well we've got more birds than butterflies, surely.

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Speaker 2: Well, you don't choose what your phobias are. No, I know,

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Speaker 2: but people have PHOBEI is about spiders.

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Speaker 4: We've got millions of them here.

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Speaker 2: It'd be hard to live with that because birds are everywhere.

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Speaker 1: Listen to the Do you get a lot of cockatoos

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Speaker 1: at your house?

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Speaker 3: We've got black cockatoos that come over a couple of

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Speaker 3: times a year, and I love them. They don't come

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Speaker 3: over for drinks. A couple of dun spew all over my.

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Speaker 4: Kitchen and go on.

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Speaker 1: Or was that me?

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Speaker 4: But I quite like them.

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Speaker 3: But I bet you've got them near where you live,

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Speaker 3: and often when I did the Northern Beaches, we had

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Speaker 3: them and first week you think I'm going to feed them.

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Speaker 4: This is beautiful. Next week they're ripping the wood from

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Speaker 4: your house.

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Speaker 5: Do not feed a cockatoon don't do that. And they're

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Speaker 5: loud like this is their conversation. This is just them

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Speaker 5: talking to each other.

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Speaker 2: That's us on zoom when I meet with my book club.

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Speaker 5: That's actually I think that is Amanda's book club on zoom.

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Speaker 5: You're right, but you know, I don't know. Birds can

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Speaker 5: be a wholes.

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Speaker 4: Of course, that can be a holes.

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Speaker 3: It's time to discuss birds are a holes. That's the

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Speaker 3: tribal drum today.

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Speaker 1: Tribal drum will beat for this.

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Speaker 4: Stop?

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Speaker 2: What's that?

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Speaker 1: That's big bird going crazy?

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Speaker 2: What made big bird go crazy?

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Speaker 5: I think it was something to do with Bernie and

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Speaker 5: Hurt's choice in life.

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Speaker 1: Bernie and Urt, Ernie, Bernie, Bernie and ERTs.

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Speaker 4: Sure does.

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Speaker 2: Had a hand up their backside. For birds are a holes?

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Speaker 3: What have you got for Darcy's in Mount Cola? What

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Speaker 3: bird was an a hole?

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Speaker 4: Darcy?

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Speaker 6: Oh, good morning. When I was little, I used to

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Speaker 6: go to the beach with my mum and dad a lot,

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Speaker 6: and one day we were eating hot chips and the

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Speaker 6: birds started swooping, as they do all the seagulls, and

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Speaker 6: they swooped down and instead of grabbing a chip, they

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Speaker 6: grabbed my little finger. So I've been scared of them

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Speaker 6: ever since. And it grabbed me the nickname Chippy from

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Speaker 6: my family.

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Speaker 1: You've become Chippy?

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Speaker 5: Did it hurt?

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Speaker 6: To be honest, I don't remember, but I feel like

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Speaker 6: it probably did.

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Speaker 7: Because I reckon it would, and I remember screaming.

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Speaker 1: Is that why you moved to Mount Cola? So you're

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Speaker 1: far away from the sea.

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Speaker 8: Yeah.

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Speaker 6: I used to be in Woolengong, so I'm well away

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Speaker 6: from it now.

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Speaker 3: What the birds have done to what the birds have done,

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Speaker 3: it's like the movie The Birds.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, she got swooped on. It's never the same again.

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Speaker 1: Karen's in North Parra Matta.

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Speaker 4: Hi, Karen, birds are a holes. What happened?

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Speaker 8: Well, We've actually got two birds that have moved into

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Speaker 8: our premises. They are in the front yard. They're in

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Speaker 8: the backyard. If I leave the back door open, they

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Speaker 8: walk in and they shit on the carpet. They'll walk

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Speaker 8: on my kitchen bench. So I've got to make sure

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Speaker 8: now that i have my back door closed. We've actually

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Speaker 8: nick we've actually nicknamed them Bonnie and Clyde. They're always

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Speaker 8: always here. Now, any bird that comes into our yard,

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Speaker 8: they are, they're thrown away. They swim in our pool,

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Speaker 8: they do everything moved in.

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Speaker 4: What kinds are they, Karen?

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Speaker 8: Then we think they're might they're my birds.

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Speaker 1: Minor bird's got trouble mina birds?

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Speaker 8: Is that what they are?

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Speaker 6: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Are they sort of grayish with black little head and

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Speaker 3: yellowy eyes.

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Speaker 8: Yeah, they've got like a little yoo beer.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 8: I've actually I've actually become attached to them.

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Speaker 4: They're introduced species.

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Speaker 1: I think.

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Speaker 5: In the process of this conversation, you've actually turned on

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Speaker 5: the bird.

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Speaker 3: Don't They've taken you hostage? Karen, don't fall for it.

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Speaker 1: Can you can you speak freely? Karen?

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Speaker 8: I can?

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Speaker 6: I can.

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Speaker 8: I can't see them right now. They might be actually

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Speaker 8: in the front yard that they're always here, always waiting.

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Speaker 8: As soon as we leave our back door open. How

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Speaker 8: our dog could go in and out. But we can't

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Speaker 8: do that anymore.

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Speaker 1: Because they walk in.

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Speaker 8: They walk in.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so you've got to shut that door.

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Speaker 3: To shut that door because minor birds they're no good,

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Speaker 3: all the native ones away.

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Speaker 1: So what's a charming bird?

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Speaker 3: It's a beautiful they're noisy, though, you can't have silent

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Speaker 3: bird life.

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Speaker 4: Well, whyn't you get a flaminga?

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Speaker 1: What about a tit? What's a tit?

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Speaker 7: Like?

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Speaker 1: Do we have tits in Australia?

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Speaker 4: What's a camera?

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Speaker 7: What?

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Speaker 1: Kayla's in Warunga? Hello? Kayla?

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Speaker 9: Hello? Guys Hew?

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Speaker 1: Are you well? You get a lot of cockatoos in

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Speaker 1: Wrunga Hai?

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Speaker 9: We certainly do.

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Speaker 8: Well.

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Speaker 9: We have a beautiful, beautiful cockatile at home who is

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Speaker 9: very domesticated and it really knows no boundaries. Anyhow, my

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Speaker 9: daughter a few months ago was getting into a little

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Speaker 9: bit of trouble, and we had a police detective over

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Speaker 9: having a little chat for her, and the bird promptly

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Speaker 9: flew on this detective shoulder and did a giant poop. So,

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Speaker 9: not only do I have a daughter that is not

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Speaker 9: being viewed quite so nicely by the powers, but I

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Speaker 9: guess I have a bird that stand up.

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Speaker 8: For the daughters.

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Speaker 9: You leave her alone? So embarrassing having to save this

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Speaker 9: guy yet. Okay, can we digress from my daughter.

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Speaker 6: For a moment.

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Speaker 9: And here's a bit of paper towel to wipe his shoulder.

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Speaker 1: Oh, it's not helping the birds not helping her? Can

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Speaker 1: I ask you? Is your daughter on the straight and narrow?

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Speaker 1: Is there everything? Okay?

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Speaker 3: Nows are like better than her sitting on the policeman's

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Speaker 3: shoulder and TRUSI showing how she felt.

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Speaker 1: Very true. Good on your Kayla. Thank you. Leanne is

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Speaker 1: in Norella and veil Hello Lianne.

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Speaker 4: Hi birds, ray holes, what happened?

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Speaker 7: They are? My in laws had a cocky that they

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Speaker 7: had for years. It used to escape regularly. It got

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Speaker 7: out this time was gone for a few weeks. One

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Speaker 7: day they heard this barking like a dog here's this

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Speaker 7: cocky walking down the street.

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Speaker 9: Barking.

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Speaker 7: Came in. Another time we had to have it at

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Speaker 7: our house and it chewed through the screen door, put

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Speaker 7: its head through and ate all the liner right inside

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Speaker 7: the door. And another time he ate through the bird

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Speaker 7: box and this poor little baby bird fell out. So

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Speaker 7: I had to get in rescue this baby bird that

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Speaker 7: lived for twenty years with a bald head because of that,

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Speaker 7: because of the goki, because of the cocky that my

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Speaker 7: mother in law repeatedly tried to knock off, but it

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Speaker 7: was too smart and it used to knock the water over.

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Speaker 1: So how did she try to kill it?

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Speaker 7: I think she put aspirin in.

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Speaker 1: It does that.

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Speaker 7: It always knew, it always knew, don't put years. But

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Speaker 7: poor old Jake was a bit of a hole.

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Speaker 3: Well this is the thing, was asking for a free

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Speaker 3: people buy those cockatoos and they lived over one hundred.

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Speaker 1: We have one at our school many years ago.

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Speaker 9: Really.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it was in the language it picked exactly.

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Speaker 1: It had lived for ninety years.

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Speaker 2: Teaching it terrible words about the headmaster.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, the old brothers were looking for an aspirin be.

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Speaker 4: Because the birds get cranked.

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Speaker 2: They do tweet at our place I tweet the bird

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Speaker 2: Jack found.

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Speaker 3: I think it was a miner in the gutter out

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Speaker 3: the front of our house, put it in a box

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Speaker 3: and tried to save it. I think it lasted two days.

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Speaker 3: This was Jack's first major heartbreak in his life, and

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Speaker 3: he was inconsolable. It was so hard to watch him

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Speaker 3: learn about death of things.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, but that was years ago. He still brings up

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Speaker 5: that bird now. He only had it for two days.

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Speaker 3: And when we were well, you know, I get emotional

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Speaker 3: sometimes and I'd clink a glass to Ripley, who'd been

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Speaker 3: our dog for sixteen years.

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Speaker 2: Jack and tweet tweet was ours for two days.

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Speaker 1: That's all happened. When you're going into the ground. And Amanda,

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Speaker 1: Sheeta was loved by everyone. What about tweet

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Speaker 4: It's a joins the and Amanda in the morning,