WEBVTT - Is it time to end the relationship? 0:00:00.120 --> 0:00:03.120 I would like to acknowledge the traditional owners of the 0:00:03.240 --> 0:00:06.560 land on which this episode is being recorded, the Coomboo 0:00:06.680 --> 0:00:10.520 Marry people. We pay our respects to elders past, present 0:00:10.560 --> 0:00:14.280 and emerging and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and 0:00:14.320 --> 0:00:22.639 Torres Strait Islander peoples. Today I'm your host, Georgie Stevenson, 0:00:22.760 --> 0:00:30.200 and this is the Rise and Concer podcast. This is 0:00:30.240 --> 0:00:33.159 the podcast where we ch have mindset, self development and 0:00:33.240 --> 0:00:37.120 becoming your higher self mix soon with a lot of laughs, 0:00:37.240 --> 0:00:40.320 plus behind the scenes of my life running two businesses 0:00:40.440 --> 0:00:43.800 and being among Think of us as the perfect combo 0:00:43.920 --> 0:00:47.440 of brunch with your besties mixed with self development. No 0:00:47.520 --> 0:00:49.839 matter where you are in your journey, we're here to 0:00:49.880 --> 0:00:53.800 help you be curious, pull yourself out, and embrace radical 0:00:53.920 --> 0:00:58.440 self awareness. If you're ready to get into the driver's 0:00:58.480 --> 0:01:01.320 seat of your own life and stop letting life pass 0:01:01.360 --> 0:01:03.520 you by, then you're in the right place. 0:01:11.440 --> 0:01:15.360 Hello everyone, and welcome back to the podcast. Today's episode 0:01:15.440 --> 0:01:17.840 is a follow up from last week's EP where we 0:01:17.880 --> 0:01:20.679 spoke about the f boy theory. So if you haven't 0:01:20.720 --> 0:01:23.640 listened to that, i'd highly suggest listening to that one 0:01:23.880 --> 0:01:27.160 before you listen to this one and Funnily enough, in 0:01:27.200 --> 0:01:31.920 this episode, g is actually contradicting herself, so remember to 0:01:32.120 --> 0:01:35.640 use some discernment when listening to this, but we do 0:01:35.680 --> 0:01:39.560 think it'll be super valuable. Nonetheless, if you're someone who 0:01:39.680 --> 0:01:42.600 is currently on your self development journey and you feel 0:01:42.640 --> 0:01:45.920 a little bit disconnected from the relationships in your life, 0:01:46.319 --> 0:01:48.400 maybe you've drifted a bit from your partner or your 0:01:48.440 --> 0:01:51.760 close friends and you're not really sure what to do 0:01:52.320 --> 0:01:55.520 or where the line is between cutting a relationship off 0:01:55.840 --> 0:01:59.520 or deciding if you can hold space and have gratitude 0:01:59.520 --> 0:02:02.680 for those real relationships anyway, then this is the perfect 0:02:02.720 --> 0:02:05.440 episode for you. I know this is a current theme 0:02:05.480 --> 0:02:07.480 as we have seen it in the Facebook group a 0:02:07.520 --> 0:02:10.240 little bit, so I think you're all going to absolutely 0:02:10.320 --> 0:02:13.040 love it. But before we get into it, a quick 0:02:13.120 --> 0:02:16.640 recommendation from me. It technically isn't out yet, but it 0:02:16.720 --> 0:02:19.200 will be out when this EP goes live, and that 0:02:19.400 --> 0:02:24.720 is Bridgeton Season three, Part two, so I highly highly 0:02:24.760 --> 0:02:27.560 recommend that. I obviously haven't watched it yet, but they 0:02:27.680 --> 0:02:30.440 never miss so that is what I will be doing 0:02:30.440 --> 0:02:33.480 with my weekend. And another reminder as well, that we 0:02:33.520 --> 0:02:36.960 are starting the Riiz and Conker project this Sunday. We 0:02:37.000 --> 0:02:40.320 are so excited. The whole team is so excited. We're 0:02:40.360 --> 0:02:42.960 all going to be sharing what we're manifesting in the 0:02:42.960 --> 0:02:46.720 Facebook group. It is the last live round we will 0:02:46.800 --> 0:02:49.840 ever run. And if you are alumni as well, we 0:02:49.919 --> 0:02:53.280 do have an alumni option to purchase so that you 0:02:53.320 --> 0:02:55.760 can join this live round and be in the Facebook 0:02:55.760 --> 0:02:57.920 group with everybody else, and it's just going to be 0:02:57.960 --> 0:03:01.280 so magical and amazing. Are feeling the pool. I will 0:03:01.360 --> 0:03:03.639 leave the link in the show notes with more information, 0:03:03.840 --> 0:03:09.359 but we'll get straight into the episode. 0:03:10.000 --> 0:03:13.560 So in this episode, I know in a couple of 0:03:13.600 --> 0:03:17.280 episodes ago, I spoke to you guys about energetic Minimums, 0:03:17.320 --> 0:03:20.240 and if you haven't listened to that episode, highly recommend 0:03:20.280 --> 0:03:22.760 you do. We'll link it in the show notes, and 0:03:22.800 --> 0:03:25.280 it basically just talks about the concept of like what 0:03:25.360 --> 0:03:29.400 you accept and allow will continue. So if you have 0:03:29.680 --> 0:03:33.840 people treating you a certain way, having low vibrational behavior 0:03:33.960 --> 0:03:37.600 and you're accepting that, that's what will continue in your reality. 0:03:37.960 --> 0:03:40.800 And obviously if you want different, you need to move different. 0:03:40.840 --> 0:03:44.280 So it's having those hard conversations or getting you know, 0:03:44.320 --> 0:03:46.960 getting rid of those people and that sort of thing. 0:03:47.960 --> 0:03:52.040 I did want to honestly kind of contradict myself and 0:03:52.080 --> 0:03:56.200 bring a whole other conversation to this. But I do 0:03:56.240 --> 0:04:01.240 think it's really important to talk about this concept because 0:04:02.160 --> 0:04:05.960 what can happen is, you know, if you're listening to 0:04:06.040 --> 0:04:09.640 this podcast, you're a self development galley. You are either 0:04:09.680 --> 0:04:13.080 starting your self development journey or you're in the midst 0:04:13.120 --> 0:04:17.520 of it. And when we are on our self development journey, 0:04:18.160 --> 0:04:22.239 we do, like we do, tend to rise quite quickly. 0:04:22.640 --> 0:04:26.159 We learn these concepts, we embody these concepts, we see 0:04:26.200 --> 0:04:29.359 them working in our life, and we're like, yes, this 0:04:29.520 --> 0:04:31.280 is the life I want to live. I need to 0:04:31.360 --> 0:04:34.640 keep living by these you know, concepts and theories and ideas, 0:04:35.200 --> 0:04:39.680 and it's amazing. And so what can happen, though, is 0:04:39.800 --> 0:04:44.600 when people no longer align with us. You know, sometimes 0:04:44.680 --> 0:04:48.040 they just fall away, and that's amazing. But then sometimes 0:04:48.600 --> 0:04:51.320 you do have this kind of choice where you're like, 0:04:51.640 --> 0:04:53.640 do I just need to get rid of these people 0:04:53.640 --> 0:04:56.000 in my life because they're no longer serving me? But 0:04:56.520 --> 0:04:59.920 that can be hard if that is a husband, a wide, 0:05:00.960 --> 0:05:04.880 a family member, like you know, someone where it is 0:05:04.920 --> 0:05:09.680 a very serious relationship or a long term friendship. And 0:05:09.760 --> 0:05:13.839 so I did want to bring in a different conversation 0:05:14.279 --> 0:05:17.920 of what to kind of you know, do in those 0:05:17.960 --> 0:05:24.280 scenarios and how you can play in the duality of 0:05:24.760 --> 0:05:28.800 being so grateful for a relationship in a person for 0:05:29.000 --> 0:05:33.359 where they're at. So obviously, again, you guys need to 0:05:33.480 --> 0:05:36.920 use your discernment in this conversation. And obviously, if someone 0:05:37.000 --> 0:05:40.000 is just super toxic and they are just treating you 0:05:40.520 --> 0:05:43.479 not okay, obviously they get rid of them, they can 0:05:44.320 --> 0:05:48.960 leave like that is totally okay. But for example, I'm 0:05:49.000 --> 0:05:50.839 just going to tell you a couple of examples in 0:05:50.880 --> 0:05:56.840 my life. So a friendship example is my best friend Licinda, 0:05:57.279 --> 0:05:59.599 who I met when I was thirteen at high school. 0:06:00.279 --> 0:06:03.560 We you know, were so we were so close in 0:06:03.640 --> 0:06:06.240 high school and then especially after we finished high school 0:06:06.320 --> 0:06:08.600 when we went through our eighteen stage and we were 0:06:08.600 --> 0:06:11.640 partying a lot, very very close. So that's like, you know, 0:06:11.680 --> 0:06:14.920 a good eight years of being glued to each other's hips, 0:06:14.920 --> 0:06:19.360 seeing each other every week. And then I kind of 0:06:19.440 --> 0:06:25.360 went on my personal development journey. I found manifestation and 0:06:25.520 --> 0:06:29.359 I started really like delving myself in this work, and 0:06:29.440 --> 0:06:32.880 I very much you know, started evolving and changing, and 0:06:32.920 --> 0:06:36.839 she hadn't found personal development yet and we kind of 0:06:36.880 --> 0:06:40.000 went through this in between stage where we were definitely 0:06:40.040 --> 0:06:45.120 still friends, but I distanced myself from that whole scenario, 0:06:45.240 --> 0:06:48.000 that whole group and you know, her included, and I 0:06:48.160 --> 0:06:52.520 just wasn't really seeing her as much. When I did, 0:06:52.720 --> 0:06:54.640 it was, you know, fine, it was great. She's an 0:06:54.680 --> 0:06:57.599 amazing person. And I did have moments around like, oh 0:06:57.680 --> 0:06:59.719 do I you know, do I even want this friendship? 0:06:59.760 --> 0:07:03.960 And I'm sure she had those moments too, and like, honestly, 0:07:04.000 --> 0:07:05.960 there would be periods in there where we probably went 0:07:06.040 --> 0:07:09.440 six months without seeing each other. And what kind of 0:07:09.560 --> 0:07:14.800 happened though, is I still held on to that love 0:07:14.880 --> 0:07:18.760 for her, and I still had space for her to, 0:07:19.400 --> 0:07:22.000 you know, do whatever she was doing, you know, if 0:07:22.000 --> 0:07:24.240 she was still partying or you know whatever. I can't 0:07:24.280 --> 0:07:27.760 really remember, but I still had space for her while 0:07:28.000 --> 0:07:31.720 working on myself, and I think and then basically what 0:07:31.960 --> 0:07:34.880 happened is a couple of years later, she also got 0:07:34.920 --> 0:07:39.000 into self development. She also got into manifestation. She's actually 0:07:39.040 --> 0:07:42.840 also a manifestation coach herself. You know, she's done her 0:07:43.200 --> 0:07:47.080 life coaching course and shadow work course and she's very 0:07:47.160 --> 0:07:49.640 much into it and now whenever, and she also has 0:07:49.680 --> 0:07:52.480 two children, so she's a mom. So now whenever we 0:07:52.560 --> 0:07:55.800 catch up, we have the most beautiful, in depth conversations 0:07:55.920 --> 0:08:01.240 and she can absolutely meet me spiritually, emotionally, intellectually, and 0:08:01.280 --> 0:08:04.240 it's an amazing relationship. And I'm not gonna lie. I 0:08:04.240 --> 0:08:06.360 still don't see her sometimes for six months, but that's 0:08:06.480 --> 0:08:09.040 just more because we're so both of us are so busy. 0:08:09.760 --> 0:08:14.160 But it is this beautiful example of I didn't just 0:08:14.320 --> 0:08:16.520 cut her out of my life because she wasn't making 0:08:16.560 --> 0:08:19.760 the cut. Even though I was evolving, I you know, 0:08:19.880 --> 0:08:22.520 distanced myself, but I still held onto that love because 0:08:22.560 --> 0:08:25.000 she was a good person and I could see her 0:08:25.080 --> 0:08:28.760 other qualities and I could see that. And now I'm 0:08:28.800 --> 0:08:34.080 benefiting so much. And now I'm benefiting so much because 0:08:34.120 --> 0:08:38.320 I have this beautiful and credible relationship with her, of 0:08:38.440 --> 0:08:42.120 knowing her for you know, fifteen years now, of having 0:08:42.160 --> 0:08:46.160 that long term memories, that long term relationship, but then 0:08:46.240 --> 0:08:49.800 also this new and deeper, more connected relationship, which is 0:08:50.040 --> 0:08:52.880 you know, that's beautiful. So that's like a friendship. Example. 0:08:53.120 --> 0:08:58.320 Another example is with my husband Tim. Again, I went 0:08:58.360 --> 0:09:02.080 on my personal development journey, you know what, like eight 0:09:02.160 --> 0:09:06.120 ten years ago now, and he didn't go on his 0:09:06.160 --> 0:09:11.760 personal development journey till last year. So there was these 0:09:12.440 --> 0:09:16.240 huge and in saying that, I'm kind of seen in hindsight, 0:09:16.720 --> 0:09:20.120 he still very met me in ways of he showed 0:09:20.120 --> 0:09:25.079 me so much love, support, kindness, and even though maybe 0:09:25.120 --> 0:09:29.920 he wasn't meeting me at an intellectual or like emotional 0:09:30.480 --> 0:09:34.760 depth scenario, I was getting my cup filled with the 0:09:34.920 --> 0:09:38.800 other aspects. Yeah, and so I could, you know, contintinue 0:09:38.840 --> 0:09:43.800 that relationship. And also he wasn't He wasn't bringing down 0:09:44.280 --> 0:09:48.480 my growth. He wasn't like, no, don't go to that course, 0:09:48.600 --> 0:09:51.000 or don't do that course we can't afford it, or like, 0:09:51.360 --> 0:09:54.559 don't go to that retreat. He was very encouraging of 0:09:54.600 --> 0:09:57.960 my evolution and my growth while still just kind of 0:09:57.960 --> 0:10:03.160 doing his own thing. And so again I very much 0:10:03.400 --> 0:10:08.120 chose to obviously continue that relationship and not just put 0:10:08.200 --> 0:10:10.199 him in like put him in the bin and be like, no, 0:10:10.240 --> 0:10:13.160 he's not in self development, you're in the bin. And 0:10:13.840 --> 0:10:18.600 now again I'm benefiting a lot from him being able 0:10:18.640 --> 0:10:22.480 to meet me in other ways and that evolution. But 0:10:22.600 --> 0:10:25.600 if I had just gone, oh no, we're two different now, 0:10:25.600 --> 0:10:28.199 we're not meant to be together, I wouldn't be benefiting 0:10:28.320 --> 0:10:30.840 of what I am now. Of course, then on that 0:10:30.920 --> 0:10:35.560 flip side, there's the whole conversation of maybe if we 0:10:35.640 --> 0:10:37.680 did break up and I met someone or you know, 0:10:38.280 --> 0:10:41.360 or and that's totally a possibility. So I'm not saying 0:10:41.800 --> 0:10:44.080 there's a right or wrong. Yeah, that's kind of what 0:10:44.080 --> 0:10:47.800 I'm getting out, But I'm just saying, don't I think 0:10:47.840 --> 0:10:51.400 it can be from a place of ego when you 0:10:51.520 --> 0:10:54.720 do go nuh, they're not meeting me, You're out because 0:10:54.800 --> 0:10:59.000 even think of yourself, like you have gone through lag periods. 0:10:59.080 --> 0:11:01.880 You have gone through periods where you weren't conscious, you 0:11:01.920 --> 0:11:05.840 weren't into self development, and you had people who people 0:11:05.920 --> 0:11:09.040 who were at a higher consciousness hold space for you, 0:11:09.720 --> 0:11:13.360 keep you, you know, still talk to you, still have 0:11:13.440 --> 0:11:18.719 relationships with you. So I think there is this conversations 0:11:18.960 --> 0:11:23.760 for not completely getting people, you know, cutting people from 0:11:23.840 --> 0:11:27.960 your life because they're not meeting you, but really exploring 0:11:28.320 --> 0:11:31.600 can you hold that relationship? Can you still be your 0:11:31.679 --> 0:11:35.199 best self? Why that person maybe that you know, I'm 0:11:35.240 --> 0:11:37.040 not saying they're not being their best self, but they're 0:11:37.120 --> 0:11:39.240 into something different? Can you hold that? 0:11:39.400 --> 0:11:42.600 Something I like to think about too, is with those 0:11:42.679 --> 0:11:46.360 relationships that's helped me know the difference as to whether 0:11:46.480 --> 0:11:49.320 to continue to hold space and maybe just distance myself 0:11:49.360 --> 0:11:52.080 a little bit. First, actually like putting in a boundary 0:11:52.080 --> 0:11:55.679 and being like this is it is if that person 0:11:55.920 --> 0:12:00.600 A makes me feel good, Like do I feel somewhat 0:12:00.640 --> 0:12:03.440 filled up after seeing them? Or do they put me 0:12:03.559 --> 0:12:06.360 down or drag me down? Because obviously if they're putting 0:12:06.440 --> 0:12:09.560 you down, you need to put a boundary in place totally. 0:12:09.800 --> 0:12:12.600 And the fact that it's almost like do they fill 0:12:12.679 --> 0:12:14.640 up at least one of your buckets? 0:12:14.960 --> 0:12:15.719 Yeah, because you. 0:12:15.720 --> 0:12:18.840 Might have one friend that maybe they're not into self 0:12:18.840 --> 0:12:23.360 development and manifestation, but they absolutely love reading all the 0:12:23.400 --> 0:12:26.160 same books as you, and they love watching the TV shows, 0:12:26.160 --> 0:12:28.320 and they love going to these concerts and stuff, and 0:12:28.640 --> 0:12:30.600 that is a value of yours and it fills up 0:12:30.640 --> 0:12:32.719 a cup of yours. So of course you're going to 0:12:32.800 --> 0:12:36.439 keep talking to them because you don't need one person 0:12:36.520 --> 0:12:39.320 to fill up every single bucket of yours. You can 0:12:39.360 --> 0:12:41.679 have multiple people and as long as they're filling up 0:12:41.720 --> 0:12:45.000 a bucket, it's fine, Yes, exactly. 0:12:45.080 --> 0:12:49.000 Well that's even like with Tim is he has not 0:12:49.320 --> 0:12:52.560 a lot of interest in like business. So for example, 0:12:52.640 --> 0:12:55.480 when I get home. I'll obviously update him of what's 0:12:55.480 --> 0:12:58.600 happening and H and R and C. But I'm not 0:12:58.679 --> 0:13:02.560 talking about business strategy with him, whereas I get that 0:13:02.600 --> 0:13:06.560 from Cooper. Yeah, and so again I'm not like being 0:13:06.559 --> 0:13:10.240 like war Tim, you're not into business, you're out which 0:13:10.320 --> 0:13:14.920 absolutely though for someone that might be super important that 0:13:14.960 --> 0:13:20.880 their partner is also business driven motivated and if you 0:13:21.040 --> 0:13:23.480 have acknowledged that part of yourself and that is a 0:13:23.559 --> 0:13:29.000 want and desire, go like, go and get that absolutely Again, 0:13:29.080 --> 0:13:32.320 That's what I'm saying. There's no right or wrong here, guys. 0:13:32.880 --> 0:13:38.440 It's you feeling into yourself, watching your ego. Because what 0:13:38.480 --> 0:13:41.400 our ego does is it protects us and it wants 0:13:41.520 --> 0:13:44.880 black and white. It wants there to be right and wrong. 0:13:45.400 --> 0:13:49.600 So any time that you're thinking something has to be 0:13:50.040 --> 0:13:52.280 an exact way or a certain way and there's no 0:13:52.440 --> 0:13:55.000 other option, that's when you know you're in your ego. 0:13:55.120 --> 0:13:58.120 And that's when you're like, oh, I even say to myself, 0:13:58.480 --> 0:14:01.560 can I see this a different way? And it's opening 0:14:01.640 --> 0:14:05.280 up your mind because the ego it brings us in 0:14:05.440 --> 0:14:07.640 and I'm using my hands again, but it puts the 0:14:07.679 --> 0:14:10.480 blinders on and it's like no, the only way you 0:14:10.480 --> 0:14:14.640 can be successful is if your husband's into business. That's 0:14:14.679 --> 0:14:19.640 not an actual truth. For example, I'm your evidence. So 0:14:20.560 --> 0:14:23.760 that's what I'm saying. Is for example, if you're like, no, 0:14:23.800 --> 0:14:27.120 but that's what I want, that's what I desire. Yes, 0:14:27.240 --> 0:14:31.160 that's amazing, that's beautiful. But just watch the beliefs of 0:14:31.320 --> 0:14:33.760 like it has to be this way or you know 0:14:33.880 --> 0:14:36.840 this will happen, because that's when you're like, Okay, I 0:14:36.840 --> 0:14:39.280 do need to open up my mind here. Yeah, but 0:14:39.360 --> 0:14:42.880 getting back to it again, and I think there is 0:14:42.960 --> 0:14:48.080 so much room for I just truly believe that if 0:14:48.200 --> 0:14:52.160 you keep working on yourself, you're clear with what you 0:14:52.400 --> 0:14:57.480 want and what you need, these people will either meet you, 0:14:58.440 --> 0:15:01.480 maybe it's years, maybe it's ars like me and Tim, 0:15:02.160 --> 0:15:06.120 or they fall away. And I've had both scenarios and 0:15:06.200 --> 0:15:09.680 both scenarios are beautiful. So you know, again, don't make 0:15:09.720 --> 0:15:13.840 it right or wrong. But also, like you said, tit, 0:15:14.720 --> 0:15:19.520 have a think about these relationships, like what are you 0:15:19.680 --> 0:15:24.280 grateful for? Is it that I actually really love that 0:15:24.360 --> 0:15:27.120 when I see them, we're not talking about personal development 0:15:27.200 --> 0:15:29.640 or business. We're talking about smart books. 0:15:32.080 --> 0:15:32.320 You know. 0:15:32.440 --> 0:15:36.080 I love that. Yeah, And again, don't get me wrong. 0:15:36.280 --> 0:15:40.000 You can have both. But also, like the relationships and 0:15:40.040 --> 0:15:42.720 the people you have around you, you've attracted them for 0:15:42.760 --> 0:15:46.800 a reason, and it's really beautiful to honor that reason. 0:15:47.760 --> 0:15:49.640 So again, what I want to do at the end 0:15:49.640 --> 0:15:54.240 of this episode is just give you some prompts to 0:15:54.600 --> 0:15:58.960 have a think about currently, like the relationship that you 0:15:58.960 --> 0:16:02.640 know you're you're men, maybe you know, not feeling as 0:16:02.800 --> 0:16:05.160 grateful for or like you feel like you might be 0:16:05.200 --> 0:16:07.920 tapping out of that relationship. And wait, before I go 0:16:08.120 --> 0:16:13.360 through these prompts, there's also a huge responsibility for you 0:16:13.720 --> 0:16:19.520 to have hard conversations about your needs, about your boundaries, 0:16:19.840 --> 0:16:24.640 about what you will accept. I've had those conversations with Tim. 0:16:25.080 --> 0:16:28.600 I've had the conversations of it's fine that you're doing 0:16:28.640 --> 0:16:32.000 your own thing, but these are my new needs, these 0:16:32.000 --> 0:16:35.280 are my new boundaries, these are my new desires in life. 0:16:35.920 --> 0:16:39.200 Are we aligned here? And then you know, we'll have 0:16:39.360 --> 0:16:43.680 that conversation again. With friendships, like, for example, that friendship 0:16:43.680 --> 0:16:48.440 with Lycinda. If she was constantly bringing me down, if 0:16:48.480 --> 0:16:51.960 she was like, you know, not meeting my needs, if 0:16:52.040 --> 0:16:54.200 she was not being a very good friend when I 0:16:54.280 --> 0:16:58.240 did see her, maybe that relationship wouldn't well, it wouldn't 0:16:58.280 --> 0:17:01.600 have continued. So she was still meeting my needs. She 0:17:01.720 --> 0:17:05.280 was still meeting something at some point, and that's why 0:17:05.320 --> 0:17:09.320 it continued. It's just now I get the benefit because 0:17:09.400 --> 0:17:12.000 I did hold onto that relationship and I didn't just 0:17:12.080 --> 0:17:16.520 cut it. Yeah, So again, think about this relationship that 0:17:16.920 --> 0:17:20.520 maybe it's a you know, a purse, a romantic relationship 0:17:20.520 --> 0:17:22.600 where you're like, I'm just not sure about it anymore. 0:17:22.880 --> 0:17:25.119 I feel like we've grown a part. Maybe it's a 0:17:25.240 --> 0:17:27.440 friendship where you're like, I feel like it's grown a part. 0:17:28.080 --> 0:17:29.919 And go through these problems and this will kind of 0:17:29.960 --> 0:17:33.000 help you get clear on what you want to do 0:17:33.080 --> 0:17:37.159 moving forward. Oh guys. Also these prompts that I say, 0:17:37.600 --> 0:17:41.639 there will be like a longer cinematic version in the 0:17:41.720 --> 0:17:45.640 Rise app where if you do want to feel really 0:17:45.640 --> 0:17:47.960 grateful for the people that are currently in your life 0:17:48.040 --> 0:17:51.320 and kind of like celebrate the differences, this meditation is 0:17:51.359 --> 0:17:54.359 going to be really beautiful for you, and it is 0:17:54.560 --> 0:17:56.720 in the Rise app. We'll put links in the show notes. 0:17:57.119 --> 0:18:00.639 And I think what's really beautiful with this sort of 0:18:00.760 --> 0:18:05.840 conversation is being able to hold duality in other people. 0:18:06.520 --> 0:18:10.400 And because if you think about it, it's a very 0:18:10.560 --> 0:18:14.600 kind of like godlike complex. If you just think everyone 0:18:14.680 --> 0:18:17.000 needs to be at my level, everyone needs to be 0:18:17.080 --> 0:18:20.600 here with me, otherwise you're out. Yeah, like that's you know, 0:18:20.760 --> 0:18:22.920 I don't know if I would like to be friends 0:18:22.920 --> 0:18:27.320 with that person. No, you do need to have space 0:18:27.640 --> 0:18:33.520 and depth and range for people being different, because otherwise, 0:18:33.680 --> 0:18:37.240 if you're just surrounded by Honestly, if you're surrounded by 0:18:37.359 --> 0:18:39.440 the exact same people around you who are doing the 0:18:39.480 --> 0:18:42.200 exact same things, who have all the exact same everything, 0:18:42.880 --> 0:18:46.639 you're never really going to grow alone or learn because 0:18:46.640 --> 0:18:49.800 you've just got like you're an echo chamber. So it 0:18:49.840 --> 0:18:54.280 is really beautiful to have different people in your life 0:18:54.320 --> 0:18:58.320 as long as they are adding value in some way. 0:18:58.920 --> 0:19:02.359 So let's go through these brom what are you grateful 0:19:02.480 --> 0:19:06.720 for in this relationship list? You know, five or ten things, 0:19:06.760 --> 0:19:09.800 whatever comes up, like what are you currently grateful for? 0:19:10.200 --> 0:19:15.160 Next prompt what is their love language? And even think 0:19:15.200 --> 0:19:19.480 about have you been showing love to them in their 0:19:19.520 --> 0:19:23.000 love language? Because I think sometimes again this is obviously 0:19:23.000 --> 0:19:25.919 more of a romantic relationship, but we can get in 0:19:26.040 --> 0:19:28.399 the oh, well, you know, they haven't been putting an 0:19:28.440 --> 0:19:32.000 effort and they haven't been this and whatnot. But then 0:19:32.040 --> 0:19:33.840 you actually think about it and you're like, well, I 0:19:33.960 --> 0:19:36.840 kind of haven't been either. And again it has to 0:19:36.840 --> 0:19:41.320 be that beautiful mutual exchange. So they've also got to 0:19:41.320 --> 0:19:43.920 be making some actions, and so do you. I then 0:19:44.040 --> 0:19:49.400 want you to think about the polarity in the relationship. Oh, 0:19:49.520 --> 0:19:52.000 let me actually talk about this. This is a problem, 0:19:52.080 --> 0:19:55.640 but let me talk about this. So I think polarity 0:19:55.720 --> 0:20:01.280 in relationships is so important. It's what it's the passion, 0:20:01.400 --> 0:20:05.119 it's the fire. And I think what can be really 0:20:05.200 --> 0:20:09.680 great is you listing, you know, what makes them different 0:20:10.400 --> 0:20:14.800 and almost why that benefits you. This is going to 0:20:14.840 --> 0:20:17.800 be huge. So let me give you an example. I 0:20:17.840 --> 0:20:21.240 was actually talking to someone about this, and in this conversation, 0:20:21.520 --> 0:20:25.320 he was saying, I often, you know, my ego would 0:20:25.320 --> 0:20:28.960 often go to this place where he works and his 0:20:29.080 --> 0:20:32.040 wife also works and they've got two kids. And he 0:20:32.280 --> 0:20:34.959 was saying, you know, I often he loves working, he 0:20:35.000 --> 0:20:38.199 loves his job. And he was saying, I often go 0:20:38.280 --> 0:20:40.800 to this place where I'm like, oh, if my wife 0:20:40.920 --> 0:20:43.440 didn't work, and if she was a stay at home mom, 0:20:44.000 --> 0:20:46.879 and you know, she just got the girl sorted, and 0:20:46.920 --> 0:20:50.400 it was like all sorted, our life would be easier. 0:20:50.680 --> 0:20:54.200 I'd be able to work more. You know, life would 0:20:54.200 --> 0:20:59.480 be easier. But then he's like, but hang on, let's 0:20:59.480 --> 0:21:02.200 have a thing. The benefits that I get because she's 0:21:02.320 --> 0:21:07.639 like this. So a benefit is financially, there is another 0:21:07.720 --> 0:21:11.520 income coming in, so financially it doesn't all rest on him. 0:21:11.800 --> 0:21:16.280 There's obviously a benefit to that. Another benefit is because 0:21:16.359 --> 0:21:20.360 she isn't just the stay at home mum who does everything, 0:21:20.680 --> 0:21:24.639 you know with the kids. He has such a beautiful 0:21:24.680 --> 0:21:28.000 relationship with his kids. He has to go to the 0:21:28.000 --> 0:21:31.280 soccer games, he has to go to the you know, 0:21:31.440 --> 0:21:33.560 take the girls to the doctors, and do all those 0:21:33.600 --> 0:21:37.480 things because sometimes she's working. And he knows because he 0:21:37.680 --> 0:21:40.879 is a workaholic. If she had it all sorted, he 0:21:40.920 --> 0:21:45.160 wouldn't go to half the things. And so he values 0:21:45.200 --> 0:21:47.560 being a good dad. So he's like, you know what, 0:21:47.600 --> 0:21:50.600 it's actually a huge benefit because it makes me a 0:21:50.640 --> 0:21:54.239 better dad because I literally have to be there. And 0:21:54.280 --> 0:21:56.760 so the alternative of like, oh, life would be easier, 0:21:56.800 --> 0:22:00.800 I could work more. It's like, do you act want that? 0:22:01.200 --> 0:22:01.520 I know? 0:22:01.760 --> 0:22:05.399 And again it's opening up your brain. It's being like, 0:22:06.119 --> 0:22:09.800 for example, let's even go to my relationship with Tim totally. 0:22:09.840 --> 0:22:12.280 Sometimes my brain goes, oh, would it be easier if 0:22:12.280 --> 0:22:15.359 I had another partner who had a business, who you know, 0:22:15.520 --> 0:22:18.280 was really into business or driven, you know, and really 0:22:18.400 --> 0:22:21.280 motivated and we can talk about business strategy. But the 0:22:21.359 --> 0:22:26.560 alternative to that is I'd probably fucking go crazy. Yeah, 0:22:26.680 --> 0:22:30.480 not crazy, sorry, I would probably never shut off. I 0:22:30.560 --> 0:22:33.760 probably wouldn't have the work life balance I have. Like, literally, 0:22:33.800 --> 0:22:36.640 when I get home, I don't think about work anymore. 0:22:37.000 --> 0:22:39.760 I have worked really hard on that, but I don't 0:22:39.760 --> 0:22:41.919 think about work anymore. I can be such a present 0:22:42.040 --> 0:22:46.480 wife and mum, so that actually benefits me so much 0:22:46.960 --> 0:22:48.040 that he's not like that. 0:22:48.880 --> 0:22:51.160 And a benefits Divy because she has parented at home 0:22:51.160 --> 0:22:52.160 with her totally. 0:22:52.920 --> 0:22:55.200 And so do you see how our brain could kind 0:22:55.240 --> 0:22:58.520 of play tricks on ourselves. And it could be that, 0:22:58.600 --> 0:23:01.280 you know, that self development, Maybe it's like that friendship 0:23:01.320 --> 0:23:02.600 and you're like, oh, I just wish me you know 0:23:02.680 --> 0:23:05.840 my friend was into self development. But it's like, well, 0:23:05.880 --> 0:23:09.400 then maybe you wouldn't have those conversations about pop culture, 0:23:09.520 --> 0:23:12.800 about the books, and you wouldn't have that beautiful enjoyment. 0:23:13.640 --> 0:23:16.320 So I think a huge thing that you can kind 0:23:16.320 --> 0:23:20.640 of hack your brain is think of the polarity of 0:23:20.720 --> 0:23:24.360 this relationship and the benefits that you get from it, 0:23:24.720 --> 0:23:27.159 And again, this will help open up your mind so 0:23:27.200 --> 0:23:29.760 you'll be less than your ego. Another good prompt is 0:23:29.800 --> 0:23:33.720 like just describing what this relationship brings out in you. 0:23:34.359 --> 0:23:36.840 So you like that relationship a tia you know, with 0:23:36.920 --> 0:23:39.720 the books and whatnot, that probably brings out like a 0:23:39.720 --> 0:23:42.840 really fun side of you and that's like, that's really 0:23:42.840 --> 0:23:46.119 cool that that comes out with that friend. Yeah. Again 0:23:46.240 --> 0:23:51.000 with me and Tim, it's like, because he is so calm, 0:23:52.000 --> 0:23:55.400 he makes me a calmer person. He makes me slow down, 0:23:55.560 --> 0:23:57.960 and that's a huge benefit to me. A good prompt 0:23:58.080 --> 0:24:01.440 is like what are you excited about in this relationship? 0:24:01.840 --> 0:24:05.720 Like think about like future plans or you know, what 0:24:05.760 --> 0:24:08.919 you guys want together, or like if it's with a friendship, 0:24:09.080 --> 0:24:12.159