WEBVTT - Do you have an allowance? Hotline ft. Tim 💰 0:00:00.400 --> 0:00:04.600 The Rising Conquer Podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of the 0:00:04.720 --> 0:00:08.320 land which this episode is being recorded, the yugen Bear region. 0:00:08.960 --> 0:00:13.360 We further acknowledge country throughout Australia and their connections to land, 0:00:13.520 --> 0:00:16.880 sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders 0:00:16.960 --> 0:00:20.920 past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal 0:00:21.000 --> 0:00:34.199 and terrestrid Islander peoples today. Hello and welcome back to 0:00:34.240 --> 0:00:37.400 the Rise and Conquer Podcasts. This is the podcast for 0:00:37.600 --> 0:00:51.800 ordinary people who want to do extraordinary things. For sure, 0:00:52.400 --> 0:00:55.960 Look Tim was a billionaire, I'd definitely stay at home 0:00:55.960 --> 0:00:59.520 with Ivy, let's be honest. But also I probably still 0:00:59.560 --> 0:01:09.080 do the pod as my little side hustle. Hello and 0:01:09.560 --> 0:01:12.839 welcome back to the Rising Conker Podcast. It is your host, 0:01:12.920 --> 0:01:17.920 Georgie Stevenson, lawyer turned entrepreneur, business owner, new mum all 0:01:18.080 --> 0:01:22.720 the things. Today, we have a very fun episode for 0:01:22.800 --> 0:01:28.200 you all. Your favorite Timothy, my husband, is on the show. 0:01:28.840 --> 0:01:31.800 We recorded this EPP a while back because honestly, you 0:01:31.840 --> 0:01:35.000 guys just had too many questions for him to cover 0:01:35.280 --> 0:01:40.440 about our relationship and our parenthood journey together. So we 0:01:40.560 --> 0:01:43.080 have divided it up and this one is just more 0:01:43.080 --> 0:01:45.960 of like a quick fire, A bit of fun and 0:01:46.440 --> 0:01:49.240 kind of like a hotline, but on a Tuesday, because 0:01:49.240 --> 0:01:50.680 we like to do things a bit crazy. 0:01:50.720 --> 0:01:53.080 Here it's December. What even is time? 0:01:53.360 --> 0:01:56.120 Actually, we're so rogan December and I love it. So 0:01:56.360 --> 0:02:00.400 today we answer all your quick fire questions, like Tim 0:02:00.440 --> 0:02:04.480 have an allowance? How can you communicate your frustrations in 0:02:04.520 --> 0:02:08.320 a relationship? I think that was about him being frustrated 0:02:08.360 --> 0:02:11.359 with me? And are you allowed to go to strip 0:02:11.400 --> 0:02:16.000 clubs or magic mic shows? Plus Tim goes into if 0:02:16.040 --> 0:02:18.920 we have any rules for each other? So much more. 0:02:19.000 --> 0:02:21.519 It's a lot of fun. You guys literally loved him 0:02:22.040 --> 0:02:26.800 and yeah, he's bringing the fun to this episode. But 0:02:27.120 --> 0:02:29.560 before we get into the episode, of course, attire a 0:02:29.639 --> 0:02:33.240 quick week update you guys, because you've had a busy weekend. 0:02:33.280 --> 0:02:35.920 I've had such a busy weekend. I don't think. I 0:02:35.960 --> 0:02:37.959 think I fit more into this weekend than I did 0:02:38.080 --> 0:02:41.639 in the last month. I just felt like a bit 0:02:41.639 --> 0:02:43.320 of a scatter brain. But I had so much fun. 0:02:43.480 --> 0:02:43.959 That's good. 0:02:44.320 --> 0:02:47.120 Bessie's twenty first, So we went to see the new 0:02:47.200 --> 0:02:48.600 Avatar had a birthday. 0:02:49.560 --> 0:02:51.920 It was amazing. Oh, I'm so excited to see it. 0:02:51.960 --> 0:02:53.600 Like I know it's Tuesday, and we're not supposed to 0:02:53.639 --> 0:02:56.040 give recommendations, but I. 0:02:55.680 --> 0:02:58.000 Highly recommend okay noted on the list. 0:02:58.200 --> 0:03:01.160 Yeah, and then went to the it on Sunday, which 0:03:01.200 --> 0:03:01.760 was a bit of fun. 0:03:02.560 --> 0:03:05.959 You're a bit of a social butterfly. Your social bucket 0:03:06.000 --> 0:03:07.640 is very well full now it is. 0:03:07.680 --> 0:03:10.160 I need a bit of an introverted time now to 0:03:10.240 --> 0:03:10.920 reach out. 0:03:11.200 --> 0:03:15.120 And what perfect time with the holidays going on. What 0:03:15.200 --> 0:03:16.440 about you? How is your week? 0:03:16.600 --> 0:03:16.840 Yes? 0:03:16.960 --> 0:03:21.120 Good. I had a bit of an exciting shoot last 0:03:21.160 --> 0:03:25.240 week and the Thursday I flew to Sydney to do 0:03:25.520 --> 0:03:29.280 a shoot with a very it's a household brand. I 0:03:29.320 --> 0:03:31.760 can't say too much until the campaign comes out, but 0:03:32.400 --> 0:03:35.720 it's like it's somewhere me and Mum would have shopped 0:03:35.880 --> 0:03:39.880 my whole entire childhood. So oh, that's so beautiful. It 0:03:39.920 --> 0:03:41.960 was very like full circle moment and I shopped there 0:03:41.960 --> 0:03:46.280 for Ivy and the reason why it was so I 0:03:46.280 --> 0:03:48.720 guess like a bit of a milestone for me. Of 0:03:48.760 --> 0:03:52.000 course working with an amazing brand that like that, but 0:03:52.280 --> 0:03:55.720 also I think I'll go into this a bit more 0:03:55.720 --> 0:03:59.280 on another podcast, but it got to Ivy's first birthday 0:03:59.480 --> 0:04:03.760 and I think I really did you know I think 0:04:03.760 --> 0:04:07.240 I was actually holding my breath in regards to my 0:04:07.440 --> 0:04:11.560 old body coming back. And even though I am someone 0:04:11.560 --> 0:04:13.840 who've done I've done a lot of work on myself 0:04:13.880 --> 0:04:16.480 and I've done a lot of work with my self 0:04:16.520 --> 0:04:19.200 worth and you know, not falling into the trap of 0:04:19.400 --> 0:04:23.680 postpartum bounce back or anything like that. But it kind 0:04:23.680 --> 0:04:27.240 of dawned to me on her first birthday of being like, oh, 0:04:27.400 --> 0:04:30.720 I think I have you know, kind of fallen into it, 0:04:30.800 --> 0:04:35.120 and then having that realization and then an opportunity like 0:04:35.160 --> 0:04:38.640 this coming up where I would be half naked shooting 0:04:38.880 --> 0:04:41.760 and that being seen a lot, and it was like 0:04:41.880 --> 0:04:44.640 kind of this moment of I couldn't think of fucking 0:04:44.680 --> 0:04:47.920 anything worse because of how I feel about myself. Yeah, 0:04:47.960 --> 0:04:49.440 and that's when I knew I had to do it. 0:04:50.320 --> 0:04:52.200 Oh my gosh, I love that and I just had 0:04:52.200 --> 0:04:55.680 to be like, no, fuck it, I need to you know, 0:04:56.040 --> 0:04:59.440 I need to embrace exactly who I am at at 0:04:59.440 --> 0:05:02.159 the moment. I need to embrace my body. I need 0:05:02.200 --> 0:05:04.800 to stop like you know, hiding it and like face 0:05:05.320 --> 0:05:07.640 face it full on. And so I did it by 0:05:07.720 --> 0:05:09.760 like doing something that scared the shit out of me, 0:05:10.279 --> 0:05:11.560 and it was super liberating. 0:05:11.720 --> 0:05:12.960 I love that so much. 0:05:13.040 --> 0:05:16.039 It was so like I think it was, yeah, like 0:05:16.440 --> 0:05:19.000 it happened all in like a big you know, realization 0:05:19.440 --> 0:05:23.080 and yeah doing it, Like I just feel incredibly proud 0:05:23.120 --> 0:05:26.280 of myself, and I'm like, yeah, I just feel like 0:05:26.360 --> 0:05:30.600 I've tackled you know, that sort of I don't want 0:05:30.600 --> 0:05:33.320 to say negative voice, but yeah, that sort of you know, 0:05:33.400 --> 0:05:35.840 negative voice that was coming up about my body and 0:05:36.200 --> 0:05:38.120 you know, bouncing back and that sort of thing. So 0:05:38.240 --> 0:05:40.840 I feel incredibly proud and I cannot wait for you 0:05:40.880 --> 0:05:43.080 guys to see the campaign. And it was just like 0:05:43.160 --> 0:05:45.960 a cool opportunity, a cool thing to you know, tick 0:05:45.960 --> 0:05:46.520 off the list. 0:05:46.720 --> 0:05:48.720 That's so exciting and I can't wait for us to 0:05:48.800 --> 0:05:51.200 a whole podcast episode and well what you can speak. 0:05:50.960 --> 0:05:54.440 About it, we will. But yeah, so that happened. I 0:05:54.480 --> 0:05:56.479 was very drained from that. I had a very chill weekend. 0:05:56.640 --> 0:05:59.719 I saw I saw a girlfriend, I got a massage, 0:06:00.080 --> 0:06:03.120 a little family time. So it was really really beautiful. 0:06:03.240 --> 0:06:08.840 But yeah, in saying that, let's get into the show. 0:06:13.800 --> 0:06:18.520 Okay, cool, So our first quick fire question is number one. 0:06:18.720 --> 0:06:21.960 If Tim was the breadwinner, would Georgie have stayed been 0:06:22.040 --> 0:06:24.480 the stay at home parent? Or has this always been 0:06:24.520 --> 0:06:26.480 the plan regardless of earning capacity. 0:06:27.839 --> 0:06:30.479 I would I would be probably at work if I 0:06:30.520 --> 0:06:32.760 was a breadwinner, like, I'd just be at work, and 0:06:32.800 --> 0:06:38.600 then you'd be a mum at home. But so weird 0:06:38.640 --> 0:06:39.200 to think about. 0:06:40.040 --> 0:06:44.839 Well, I know, but we've always spoken about me going 0:06:44.920 --> 0:06:49.160 back to work. I do sometimes have fantasies of being 0:06:49.200 --> 0:06:52.200 a stay at home mum. And I'm like, if I 0:06:52.240 --> 0:06:57.000 was married to like. 0:06:54.960 --> 0:07:01.280 Like her prince, a bazillionaire, not only then and I 0:07:01.320 --> 0:07:02.839 wouldn't have to do anything, and then I have a 0:07:02.839 --> 0:07:04.960 babysit all the time, so I wouldn't be looking. 0:07:04.800 --> 0:07:10.560 Up for I'd probably go work. I think literally from 0:07:10.600 --> 0:07:14.000 the start, we've always had the conversation, and Tim has 0:07:14.080 --> 0:07:17.160 always been such a like you've always wanted to be 0:07:17.200 --> 0:07:28.920 a dad. Yeah, sure, look Tim was a billionaire. I 0:07:28.960 --> 0:07:31.480 definitely stay at home with Ivy, let's be honest. But 0:07:31.680 --> 0:07:34.600 also I probably still do the potty as my little 0:07:34.600 --> 0:07:39.480 side hustle. Yeah, it would just be a hobby. 0:07:39.600 --> 0:07:40.640 You need to do something. 0:07:41.000 --> 0:07:44.800 I just I love what I do. I love I 0:07:44.840 --> 0:07:47.040 love you know, doing things. 0:07:48.880 --> 0:07:52.760 Next question, does Tim get an allowance each week or 0:07:52.920 --> 0:07:54.560 are all cards shared. 0:07:59.640 --> 0:08:05.600 So it's exactly. A funny conversation and topic, isn't it. Well, Like, 0:08:07.560 --> 0:08:10.200 so my mom and dad have like separate money. Yeah, 0:08:10.840 --> 0:08:12.640 so that's how I was brought up. So I was like, 0:08:12.960 --> 0:08:13.560 everything like. 0:08:13.480 --> 0:08:16.480 Separate right right, where's my parents? Everything has shed? 0:08:16.640 --> 0:08:21.160 Everything is together. But I'm like I'm happy. Yeah, I 0:08:21.200 --> 0:08:24.800 do get an allowance each week, but it's only just 0:08:24.920 --> 0:08:27.360 happened because I just try to, like, say a bit 0:08:27.400 --> 0:08:28.720 of money because. 0:08:28.880 --> 0:08:32.480 Get an allowance. We both get an allowance and it's 0:08:32.520 --> 0:08:35.360 the same amount of money. Yeah, so we are trying 0:08:35.440 --> 0:08:41.600 to budget right now. Previously we've never budgeted and it's 0:08:41.760 --> 0:08:44.720 just we have one we both have cards from the 0:08:44.760 --> 0:08:48.680 same account, and Tim just bought whatever he wanted at 0:08:48.720 --> 0:08:49.240 any time. 0:08:49.720 --> 0:08:54.360 I wouldn't say whatever I wanted, you did what you 0:08:54.480 --> 0:08:56.280 bought him rogue thing. 0:08:56.640 --> 0:08:58.960 That was just like you didn't ask, you just went 0:08:59.160 --> 0:09:00.079 you did it. 0:09:01.240 --> 0:09:04.920 Oh jeez, I don't think maybe like a new golf 0:09:04.920 --> 0:09:07.439 club or something. It's like a thousand. 0:09:09.400 --> 0:09:12.920 Yeah, this is like all one golf club, one golf 0:09:12.960 --> 0:09:16.160 club and one thousand dollars And I just like look 0:09:16.160 --> 0:09:18.520 at my card and I'm like, what the. 0:09:21.000 --> 0:09:24.319 Just claiming on tax? We cart? 0:09:27.360 --> 0:09:28.160 Oh my god? 0:09:28.640 --> 0:09:32.640 Before what has recently happened because I have our financial 0:09:32.640 --> 0:09:36.320 advisor was like, you guys need a budget. We had 0:09:36.559 --> 0:09:40.439 two cards, one account, Tim bought whatever he wanted. Now 0:09:40.760 --> 0:09:45.040 we both have allowances where we get a set money 0:09:45.440 --> 0:09:49.800 deposited every single week. That is the same. And then 0:09:49.840 --> 0:09:53.080 there's also so we have separate cards where it's Tim's money, 0:09:53.679 --> 0:09:56.720 my money, and then we have a family card. And 0:09:56.800 --> 0:09:59.600 so the just is this of the allowance that we 0:09:59.679 --> 0:10:03.120 have that is the same is like money where we 0:10:03.200 --> 0:10:05.800 do whatever we want with it, where it's like I 0:10:05.800 --> 0:10:07.319 don't know what Tim does with it. He doesn't know 0:10:07.360 --> 0:10:09.000 what I do in it, and we don't care. It's 0:10:09.040 --> 0:10:10.880 your fun money. Yeah, And then we had. 0:10:10.920 --> 0:10:13.520 But we like we would like we've got the same 0:10:13.520 --> 0:10:18.360 app like we can all see can actually see. 0:10:15.679 --> 0:10:23.559 What it looks like at the strippers or something. We'll 0:10:23.559 --> 0:10:27.679 get into that letter. And then we have a family card, 0:10:27.760 --> 0:10:32.480 which is like groceries bills, a bill's account. Yeah, yeah, 0:10:32.679 --> 0:10:35.240 that's what we do. But in saying that, Tim will 0:10:35.240 --> 0:10:37.600 often be like, there's no money in the family card 0:10:38.120 --> 0:10:41.040 and we'll just use another card because there's numerous guards. 0:10:41.520 --> 0:10:43.439 But we're definitely we're. 0:10:43.240 --> 0:10:46.880 Trying to be better better. Yeah, I love that. 0:10:47.720 --> 0:10:51.320 Number Three. Do you have times and this one's for 0:10:51.400 --> 0:10:53.760 Tim Do you ever have times where you'd rather be 0:10:53.800 --> 0:10:54.559 the working parent? 0:10:55.960 --> 0:10:56.200 Yeah? 0:10:56.520 --> 0:11:00.400 Remember sometimes I I'm like, I just want to get 0:11:00.400 --> 0:11:02.960 back to work. Like even the other day when I 0:11:03.000 --> 0:11:05.920 was helping Dan all day and Mum and Dad had 0:11:05.920 --> 0:11:08.280 IVY because I had to help him on our renovations 0:11:08.280 --> 0:11:10.560 on our house. I finished the day and I was 0:11:10.640 --> 0:11:13.720 like I could keep going. I'm good to go, Like 0:11:13.760 --> 0:11:15.920 I wasn't drained, and I was just like wow, like 0:11:16.000 --> 0:11:18.200 this is what I used to feel like even after work, 0:11:19.280 --> 0:11:21.480 but like I don't Yeah, I don't know, so much 0:11:21.520 --> 0:11:22.440 has changed. 0:11:22.559 --> 0:11:26.599 Like now, so is like what you're probably not understanding 0:11:27.040 --> 0:11:30.800 is you would then if we both worked, you would 0:11:30.800 --> 0:11:33.360 work and then you would come home and we'd both 0:11:33.440 --> 0:11:36.000 do IVY, whereas I do majority of IVY when I 0:11:36.040 --> 0:11:39.480 come home. So you'd be pretty exhausted if you were 0:11:39.559 --> 0:11:41.400 doing physical labor all day out. 0:11:41.880 --> 0:11:45.080 But then like, but then I'd be doing like gym 0:11:45.080 --> 0:11:46.800 as well, Like I have him in the gym in 0:11:46.840 --> 0:11:50.000 a little while now, but like you get your gym 0:11:50.000 --> 0:11:50.400 in the. 0:11:50.320 --> 0:11:52.760 Morning and then get up and do gym too, because 0:11:52.800 --> 0:11:53.920 IVY doesn't wake up till. 0:11:53.760 --> 0:11:55.800 Six point thirty in the morning. I just can't do it. 0:11:55.880 --> 0:11:57.720 He just he wakes up the same time as me, 0:11:57.760 --> 0:11:59.000 but he just sits on his phone. 0:11:59.400 --> 0:12:00.400 I don't research. 0:12:00.920 --> 0:12:02.400 That's still on your phone. Research? 0:12:02.440 --> 0:12:06.959 What? Just like things at the minute, like what I read, 0:12:07.120 --> 0:12:09.520 research and had to respray roof because we go to 0:12:09.600 --> 0:12:11.640 respray and just like. 0:12:11.600 --> 0:12:16.280 That, it's just quiet time. In saying that, though I 0:12:17.320 --> 0:12:20.040 often fanasize about being a state home mum. 0:12:21.200 --> 0:12:24.000 I'll go back to work lives for a week. 0:12:26.240 --> 0:12:30.480 It's like Tims on the podcast. Tim's on My Stories. 0:12:32.320 --> 0:12:40.600 Guys, wear my pedal and press in the dress. This 0:12:40.640 --> 0:12:41.920 is my makeup tutorial. 0:12:48.360 --> 0:12:49.480 Quick keep. 0:12:49.600 --> 0:12:52.640 Next question, best and worst thing state home? 0:12:53.880 --> 0:12:54.800 Shut the funk up? 0:12:56.760 --> 0:13:01.360 What was the question? Oh? 0:13:02.320 --> 0:13:02.600 Sorry? 0:13:02.880 --> 0:13:04.760 Best and worst than you're being a stay at home parents. 0:13:04.840 --> 0:13:08.240 Best thing is like most afternoons they come, they're sitting 0:13:08.280 --> 0:13:09.280 on the couch watching TV. 0:13:09.400 --> 0:13:09.800 Together. 0:13:10.800 --> 0:13:15.959 That you mean we're talking about fun things. I watch 0:13:16.000 --> 0:13:16.560 her grow up. 0:13:16.760 --> 0:13:20.800 Yeah, Okay, don't put what Yeah, hanging out with her 0:13:20.840 --> 0:13:23.640 all day is pretty fun and just mucking around. 0:13:23.640 --> 0:13:25.480 We just muck around all the time, feeding her all 0:13:25.480 --> 0:13:28.240 the time. She just eats continuously. Yeah, and they just 0:13:28.280 --> 0:13:30.400 have snacks all day and worse. 0:13:31.320 --> 0:13:34.559 Worst thing would be like being in charge of another 0:13:34.600 --> 0:13:38.000 small human. It's like it's. 0:13:40.040 --> 0:13:40.559 Exhausting. 0:13:40.679 --> 0:13:41.400 It's exhausting. 0:13:42.280 --> 0:13:47.080 Number five thoughts on either spouse going to strip clubs, 0:13:47.160 --> 0:13:49.360 slash magic mic events for women. 0:13:50.040 --> 0:13:51.760 I couldn't care. Like maybe back in the day, I 0:13:51.760 --> 0:13:53.079 would be like, what do you want to go? But 0:13:53.120 --> 0:13:55.160 like now I'm just like I feel. 0:13:54.920 --> 0:13:58.720 Like even back in the day, you don't lie like. 0:14:00.480 --> 0:14:06.800 You do you Like I feel like we wouldn't you can't. 0:14:06.840 --> 0:14:09.920 But I'm like, don't you think It's like the whole 0:14:09.960 --> 0:14:11.560 thing is like a bit like why would you want 0:14:11.559 --> 0:14:12.320 it anyway? 0:14:12.960 --> 0:14:15.679 Anyway, So how I feel about this is no, you're 0:14:15.679 --> 0:14:17.400 not going to strip club, but. 0:14:17.320 --> 0:14:20.440 They're like I don't. I don't like to feel I just. 0:14:20.400 --> 0:14:26.720 Be like no. But in saying that, like I obviously 0:14:26.840 --> 0:14:29.320 know you go to Bucks and you know we all 0:14:29.360 --> 0:14:32.800 know what happens at Barks, and it's like I don't 0:14:32.840 --> 0:14:35.720 love it. But also I'm not gonna say you can't 0:14:35.760 --> 0:14:38.560 go to all Bucks, just like I go to Hens, 0:14:38.640 --> 0:14:40.120 and because it's. 0:14:39.920 --> 0:14:51.040 Like we like not like pretty good. I don't know. Yeah, 0:14:51.480 --> 0:14:54.040 like there's no, there's no if it. 0:14:54.000 --> 0:14:55.920 Was like a Wednesday afternoon and Tim's going to a 0:14:55.920 --> 0:15:03.120 strip club or I'm like, yeah, I think it's like 0:15:03.600 --> 0:15:07.240 open communication. If anything was to happen, it's like you've 0:15:07.240 --> 0:15:09.960 just got to have that trust and open communication, of 0:15:11.080 --> 0:15:12.640 which it wouldn't. 0:15:13.440 --> 0:15:17.640 Yeah, next question, how can you better communicate and deal 0:15:17.680 --> 0:15:22.560 with frustration? For example, this lady's partner hasn't done something 0:15:22.720 --> 0:15:25.800 that she would do without thinking, for example, cleaning up 0:15:25.840 --> 0:15:28.760 the kitchen after making a mess folding clothes straight away. 0:15:29.120 --> 0:15:32.040 His response is always I'll do it later, which half 0:15:32.080 --> 0:15:34.680 the time turns into me doing it three days later. 0:15:35.040 --> 0:15:37.080 I love him, but man, he does my head in. 0:15:39.880 --> 0:15:40.000 Me. 0:15:43.840 --> 0:15:50.520 It's literally so funny because this is me and Tim's like, 0:15:50.760 --> 0:15:52.200 just do the dishes now, and I'm. 0:15:52.080 --> 0:15:57.200 Like ten years doing this and I've just given up. 0:15:57.360 --> 0:15:58.880 I'll just do it and I don't win. 0:16:00.320 --> 0:16:01.280 You've just accepted it. 0:16:01.360 --> 0:16:03.840 I've just accepted it and just like it's all good. 0:16:03.960 --> 0:16:04.960 This is my opinion. 0:16:05.080 --> 0:16:08.040 But like, so I've accepted it because it's like George 0:16:08.080 --> 0:16:10.600 is so busy, and like, I get it that you're 0:16:10.600 --> 0:16:13.720 always doing stuff, but if like the if he's like 0:16:14.520 --> 0:16:16.720 just being slack and he's at the pub instead of 0:16:16.880 --> 0:16:19.080 folding the clothes or doing whatever that she's us and 0:16:19.120 --> 0:16:19.560 that's ship. 0:16:19.960 --> 0:16:21.800 I feel like I feel like me and Tim are 0:16:21.880 --> 0:16:24.760 quite equal where you know, I work all day and 0:16:24.800 --> 0:16:27.200 then I come home and I, you know, do Ivy 0:16:27.200 --> 0:16:30.440 in the afternoon because I want to. And Tim obviously 0:16:30.480 --> 0:16:32.720 has Ivy all day and he still helps with Ivy 0:16:32.760 --> 0:16:35.800 in the afternoon. Like we're pretty equal on that sort 0:16:35.840 --> 0:16:39.080 of stuff. But in saying that, he's definitely the cleaner one. 0:16:39.840 --> 0:16:43.960 I have the view of you have dinner, you make dinner, 0:16:44.200 --> 0:16:46.760 you eat dinner, and then you clean on clean up after. 0:16:47.320 --> 0:16:49.960 Tim has the view that you make dinner, you clean up, 0:16:50.400 --> 0:16:53.720 and then you go have dinner, even if it's cold. 0:16:54.000 --> 0:16:57.840 Only sometimes we have used to be pretty bad, but 0:16:57.920 --> 0:17:02.480 now I'm like I can ever. I'm just like used 0:17:02.480 --> 0:17:03.760 to have like such an O C D think about 0:17:03.800 --> 0:17:06.800 him like I'm gotten a lot more. Yeah, chill, I 0:17:06.840 --> 0:17:11.560 Reckon tell us humans in general become a lot more 0:17:12.040 --> 0:17:16.639 relaxed when they have a kid. Well, not relaxed, but 0:17:16.680 --> 0:17:19.639 in a way it's like it's more like it's. 0:17:19.520 --> 0:17:21.920 Your control that you kind of just get. 0:17:22.080 --> 0:17:24.320 Before Ivy, I was like's going to be like this 0:17:24.560 --> 0:17:27.320 because Ivy is like such a whirlwind. It's like now 0:17:27.359 --> 0:17:29.399 it's like, oh, I'm just tak care like whatever. 0:17:29.880 --> 0:17:33.000 That's like sometimes I see Tim so Ivy has this 0:17:33.119 --> 0:17:35.800 little like a bunch of toys in our lounge room, 0:17:36.000 --> 0:17:38.399 so she plays with toys while we're watching TV or something, 0:17:38.840 --> 0:17:43.400 and I see Tim like clean it up most now, 0:17:43.840 --> 0:17:45.800 and I just think, but she's just going to come 0:17:45.840 --> 0:17:49.320 and play with it tomorrow. But little stuff like that. 0:17:49.440 --> 0:17:52.560 But I'm like, it doesn't bother me. If it bothers you, 0:17:52.560 --> 0:17:53.360 you clean it up? 0:17:54.160 --> 0:17:54.560 Do you mean? 0:17:54.640 --> 0:17:56.200 Otherwise? I'm not going to sit there and pack away 0:17:56.359 --> 0:17:58.560 toys that she's just going to get out tomorrow unless 0:17:58.560 --> 0:18:00.600 there's visitors coming over and then I'll be like clean 0:18:02.080 --> 0:18:06.159 and Tim's like what do you? But yeah, look I 0:18:06.200 --> 0:18:08.800 can be a little bit bad with cleaning things up, 0:18:08.880 --> 0:18:17.000 but I have other great traits. This person, what's your advice? 0:18:17.960 --> 0:18:21.720 Communication Like, be like this really bothers me? Like if 0:18:21.880 --> 0:18:23.840 you said that to me, and you're like, I will 0:18:23.840 --> 0:18:26.720 divorce you if you don't start cleaning up, I'm obviously gonna. 0:18:26.840 --> 0:18:28.600 I think that's a bit like that's pretty you shouldn't 0:18:28.600 --> 0:18:31.440 have to come to that conversation though, Like the other 0:18:31.440 --> 0:18:33.479 person should respect you enough to be like, all right, 0:18:33.520 --> 0:18:35.200 I'll just pick up the act a little bit more. 0:18:35.400 --> 0:18:47.919 Yeah, it's like Tim, I'm so busy and can you 0:18:48.000 --> 0:18:48.800 clean up my plate? 0:18:51.000 --> 0:18:53.959 Next question, what are some ways to reconnect if you're 0:18:54.000 --> 0:18:55.240 feeling distant from each other? 0:18:55.600 --> 0:18:56.119 Put in. 0:19:01.720 --> 0:19:07.000 That's a good quick it you go first, There, you 0:19:07.040 --> 0:19:07.480 go first. 0:19:08.119 --> 0:19:11.959 I think just prioritizing time together. So I will often 0:19:12.080 --> 0:19:14.199 have this dilemma where I'm in a huff and a 0:19:14.200 --> 0:19:16.560 puff and I'm like, I just don't feel connected to 0:19:16.600 --> 0:19:21.480 you in terms like rolls his eyes. And then we're like, okay, 0:19:21.640 --> 0:19:24.760 well this weekend, why don't we have a beach day together? 0:19:25.240 --> 0:19:28.600 You know obviously with Ivy or you know, I'll be like, oh, 0:19:28.680 --> 0:19:30.439 I really want to go see this new movie, like 0:19:30.560 --> 0:19:33.480 let's go have a date night, or you know, it's 0:19:33.560 --> 0:19:40.680 just prioritizing time together and deciding that it's just as 0:19:40.720 --> 0:19:45.479 as important as other things like your child or your career. 0:19:46.240 --> 0:19:51.480 MM. Love that. But if like it even like little 0:19:51.480 --> 0:19:54.920 spontaneous like gifts and stuff, that's quite sweet as well. 0:19:55.040 --> 0:19:58.159 When do you ever get me spontaneous gifts? Actually you 0:19:58.200 --> 0:19:59.680 do bring home treats. 0:20:00.600 --> 0:20:03.159 Yes, little things like that he brought the other day. 0:20:03.160 --> 0:20:03.679 He's like. 0:20:05.240 --> 0:20:07.919 It was like fresh cinnamon. 0:20:07.560 --> 0:20:11.680 Donuts, and he's like, I've got you a tree. 0:20:12.000 --> 0:20:14.200 Just like just like little last little things like that. 0:20:14.240 --> 0:20:16.720 You know, Yeah, I guess that's a good thing of 0:20:16.760 --> 0:20:20.400 like putting yourself in Well, it's even like remember when 0:20:20.440 --> 0:20:25.240 we did the love language quiz and I found out 0:20:25.240 --> 0:20:28.199 like yours just like physical touch and like affirmations. And 0:20:28.240 --> 0:20:30.199 I don't know if you've noticed, but I've been like 0:20:30.400 --> 0:20:33.639 a bit more prominent of like giving you a little 0:20:33.640 --> 0:20:35.080 stroke on the shoulder. 0:20:44.359 --> 0:20:49.240 Good morning. Then read your book. 0:20:52.040 --> 0:20:56.840 I love a good book reading. I would take the 0:20:56.880 --> 0:20:59.439 love language test and then boast, pry and do you love. 0:20:59.640 --> 0:21:01.240 Yeah, it would be a good thing. That's probably the 0:21:01.240 --> 0:21:01.760 best idea. 0:21:02.119 --> 0:21:05.600 Like yeah, the next question, do you have any rules 0:21:05.600 --> 0:21:11.119 for each other, like, for example, like no strip clubs 0:21:11.200 --> 0:21:13.520 or no friends of the opposite gender, stuff like that. 0:21:16.560 --> 0:21:23.240 There's no rules really, just behave. I don't know. 0:21:23.280 --> 0:21:26.520 I think like there's no actual strict rules in our relationship. 0:21:26.600 --> 0:21:29.359 I think, you know, we kind of know the lines 0:21:29.400 --> 0:21:34.119 of things. I think with any relationship, it's kind of like, 0:21:34.160 --> 0:21:36.440 you know, treat the person how you would want to 0:21:36.480 --> 0:21:37.040 be treated. 0:21:38.760 --> 0:21:41.680 Probably like the biggest rule would be like no spontaneous 0:21:42.240 --> 0:21:47.800 things cannot be spontaneous, more like without each other. 0:21:48.800 --> 0:21:51.800 Glad our biggest like a big fight that you know 0:21:51.840 --> 0:21:54.360 we've had this year. The one that I can remember 0:21:54.760 --> 0:21:58.160 is when Tim came home and was like, I'm going 0:21:58.160 --> 0:22:01.720 out tonight, and it it wasn't so much him going out, 0:22:01.760 --> 0:22:04.119 but I was like, well, it would have been nice 0:22:04.119 --> 0:22:06.320 to know because I would have invited a girlfriend around 0:22:06.320 --> 0:22:08.600 and we could have a wine with our babies, or 0:22:09.000 --> 0:22:12.679 I would have planned something in this time. Yeah, Or 0:22:12.680 --> 0:22:13.679 it's just because I. 0:22:13.760 --> 0:22:15.720 Changed my mind about it. It wasn't it. It was like 0:22:15.880 --> 0:22:17.919 I wasn't going. I'm like, I am going, and then 0:22:17.960 --> 0:22:19.399 at last minute I was like, no, I'm going to go. 0:22:20.160 --> 0:22:21.840 And George was stuck with Ivy sort of thing. 0:22:21.760 --> 0:22:23.400 And I was like, oh, but it's not about being 0:22:23.440 --> 0:22:26.680 stuck with Ivy. It's about me mentally going, Okay, I've 0:22:26.680 --> 0:22:30.119