WEBVTT - ASK UNCUT - You can't resuscitate a dead starfish 0:00:00.880 --> 0:00:05.280 Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout 0:00:05.320 --> 0:00:09.120 Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We 0:00:09.160 --> 0:00:11.920 pay our respect to their elders past and present and 0:00:12.039 --> 0:00:15.360 extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander 0:00:15.360 --> 0:00:16.120 peoples today. 0:00:16.320 --> 0:00:19.599 This episode is recorded on Gaddigal Land of the Aurora Nation. 0:00:39.120 --> 0:00:42.280 Hi guys, Adam, welcome back to another episode of Life 0:00:42.320 --> 0:00:45.040 on CANT. I'm Laura and I'm Britney and this is 0:00:45.159 --> 0:00:48.440 ask gun can't out down and dirty sexy, little saucy number? 0:00:48.440 --> 0:00:51.400 Will we answer? You're deep, You're dark, and you're burning questions? 0:00:52.760 --> 0:00:57.160 How funny is it when ten so this morning? You 0:00:57.200 --> 0:00:59.120 know we're mid morning now, but I got up early, 0:00:59.440 --> 0:01:02.240 went for a walk run with Delilah down to the park. 0:01:02.280 --> 0:01:03.840 I got a coffee. You know, I hadn't brushed my 0:01:03.880 --> 0:01:05.360 hair yet, didn't put any makeup on. You know, one 0:01:05.400 --> 0:01:06.680 of those days you're like, let's just get up and 0:01:07.040 --> 0:01:09.880 get up and at them. Oh yeah, yeah, it's just 0:01:10.080 --> 0:01:12.919 essentially what I know what's coming. Yeah yeah. So essentially 0:01:13.000 --> 0:01:15.320 what I'm saying is those days where you're like, I'm 0:01:15.319 --> 0:01:18.919 just gonna let my natural best self, my natural beauty 0:01:19.000 --> 0:01:21.600 shine through. I'm just gonna be I'm gonna be okay 0:01:21.640 --> 0:01:23.960 with waking up, makeup lers, walking out of the house 0:01:24.000 --> 0:01:26.240 and being one with how I actually look in the world. Yeah, 0:01:26.319 --> 0:01:28.760 like who I really am. And then I was in 0:01:28.840 --> 0:01:31.280 the home office waiting for Laura and Produce a Kesha 0:01:31.360 --> 0:01:33.520 to come over and still hadn't got changed or anything 0:01:33.520 --> 0:01:35.160 stim actual where it didn't put any makeup on, still 0:01:35.200 --> 0:01:37.640 hadn't brush my hair, and Laura walks in and she's like, 0:01:37.640 --> 0:01:39.600 oh babe, are you all right? And I was like, 0:01:39.600 --> 0:01:41.640 what do you mean. She's like, you don't look great, 0:01:41.640 --> 0:01:43.800 like you've been crying. Like this looks like what's been 0:01:43.840 --> 0:01:45.840 going on? And I just had that moment where I 0:01:45.880 --> 0:01:49.160 was like, Wow, this is just what I look like. 0:01:49.400 --> 0:01:51.640 This is me with no smoking mirrors, no natural light, 0:01:51.800 --> 0:01:54.280 no makeup, no hair, and it's like it reminded me 0:01:54.360 --> 0:01:58.480 when one time, ever, one time to work, I didn't 0:01:58.480 --> 0:02:00.240 wear makeup at all. I was like, I'm going to 0:02:00.280 --> 0:02:01.760 be all natural. I was in the hospital and I 0:02:01.800 --> 0:02:04.440 remember walking in I reckon ten people that day said 0:02:04.480 --> 0:02:06.400 to me, are you sick? Are you unwell? And I 0:02:06.440 --> 0:02:08.920 was like, oh my god, I just bok. 0:02:09.200 --> 0:02:12.840 No, I'm sorry. In my defense, that is not what happened. 0:02:13.120 --> 0:02:15.160 I said, are you okay? You look like you had 0:02:15.160 --> 0:02:18.200 been crying because you had super red eyes. Had nothing 0:02:18.240 --> 0:02:19.680 to do with the makeup, had nothing to do with 0:02:19.720 --> 0:02:22.080 fresh skin. We're all here for it. It was because 0:02:22.080 --> 0:02:24.160 your eyes were red, and you said, yeah, actually, I've 0:02:24.200 --> 0:02:26.520 been feeling really unwell. I don't know what's wrong with me, 0:02:26.560 --> 0:02:27.800 but I think feeling great. 0:02:27.880 --> 0:02:30.720 No, yes, but that was a cover up because great, 0:02:31.520 --> 0:02:33.359 I feel like. 0:02:33.000 --> 0:02:35.200 You're like, oh yeah, I feel actually no, yeah, I 0:02:35.240 --> 0:02:36.799 must feel like shit because I look like shit. 0:02:36.960 --> 0:02:38.600 Yeah, totally. I have miss sleeping. Well. Do you know 0:02:38.639 --> 0:02:39.760 what the problem with you? 0:02:39.800 --> 0:02:42.040 Brewt is that you do always wear makeup like you're 0:02:42.120 --> 0:02:44.680 You're always very well put together. And that's not the 0:02:44.720 --> 0:02:47.160 problem with you, like that, you're great, but you're always 0:02:47.160 --> 0:02:47.880 put together. 0:02:48.680 --> 0:02:49.120 Okay. 0:02:49.560 --> 0:02:53.119 The difference is I never am I never really ever 0:02:53.160 --> 0:02:55.520 wear makeup. So anytime I do wear makeup, people like 0:02:55.800 --> 0:02:59.120 you look amazing today, But no one ever really says 0:02:59.120 --> 0:03:01.120 to my face that you shit because I don't want 0:03:01.680 --> 0:03:03.360 ninety nine point nine percent of the time because you 0:03:03.400 --> 0:03:04.480 cannot wear makeup. 0:03:04.560 --> 0:03:09.520 You are a natural beauty. I am not shut up anyway. 0:03:09.560 --> 0:03:12.200 That was our start to the day. We're finally sitting 0:03:12.200 --> 0:03:14.080 down in front of each other, a couple of coffees deep, 0:03:14.120 --> 0:03:16.120 and we're getting to your question. No, do you know 0:03:16.160 --> 0:03:18.440 what I want to get to you first? So something 0:03:18.480 --> 0:03:20.280 that came out in an intimacy challenger. 0:03:21.160 --> 0:03:24.280 Yeah, look, the intimacy challenges. It's been challenging. Put it 0:03:24.320 --> 0:03:26.480 that way, Matt. We kind of stopped talking about it, 0:03:26.520 --> 0:03:28.760 didn't we. It's been not really many updates recently. 0:03:28.800 --> 0:03:30.440 I don't think I mean, correct me if I'm wrong. 0:03:30.600 --> 0:03:32.200 I don't think you have many updates. 0:03:32.280 --> 0:03:35.040 We know we have been intimate. Do you know what 0:03:35.080 --> 0:03:36.680 Matt and I had a fight in last night? We 0:03:36.720 --> 0:03:39.560 went for dinner and I tried to hold his hand. 0:03:39.920 --> 0:03:42.640 I was like being I was like being nice, I 0:03:42.680 --> 0:03:44.120 was like being a loving partner, and I. 0:03:44.120 --> 0:03:45.560 Don't know I to hold his hand. 0:03:45.680 --> 0:03:47.640 Well, has anyone else experienced this? Like you've gone out 0:03:47.640 --> 0:03:49.280 for dinner, or you've done something with your part maybe 0:03:49.280 --> 0:03:51.120 you've been to a party, whatever it is, and you 0:03:51.240 --> 0:03:55.880 feel like you have been particularly cuddly and and like affectionate, 0:03:56.240 --> 0:03:58.480 and then they just haven't met you with that affection 0:03:58.600 --> 0:04:01.080 because maybe they didn't notice, or they kind of weren't 0:04:01.080 --> 0:04:03.480 in the remood for whatever the reason is. So then 0:04:04.000 --> 0:04:06.080 I progressively got more annoyed at him. So then I 0:04:06.120 --> 0:04:08.000 started playing a game where I was like, oh, now 0:04:08.000 --> 0:04:09.440 I'll try and hold his hand. If he doesn't hold 0:04:09.440 --> 0:04:11.040 my hand, I'll just get angrier on the inside. 0:04:11.600 --> 0:04:13.560 Yeah, because you're almost to the point where you're like, 0:04:14.240 --> 0:04:16.080 I want to get angry now, so you do one 0:04:16.080 --> 0:04:18.040 more thing, yes, doing one more thing to siss me. 0:04:18.279 --> 0:04:19.800 Then I tried to give him a kiss and he 0:04:19.839 --> 0:04:21.840 pulled away from me, and I was like, oh, oh, well, 0:04:21.880 --> 0:04:23.080 we'll have a fight when we get home. 0:04:23.120 --> 0:04:25.919 He pulled away and we did. Why did he pull away? 0:04:26.160 --> 0:04:27.760 Just wasn't into it, didn't want to kiss me. He's 0:04:27.920 --> 0:04:29.640 in the middle of his vindaloo, I. 0:04:29.560 --> 0:04:33.440 Gues, does he not understand how the intimacy challenge works? 0:04:33.880 --> 0:04:36.279 Maybe he's just sick of being intimate now he's like 0:04:36.320 --> 0:04:39.280 I've had enough naked store. Okay, So that is your 0:04:39.400 --> 0:04:40.799 update on the intimacy challenge. 0:04:40.800 --> 0:04:43.480 Okay, but that wasn't what I wanted to talk to 0:04:43.520 --> 0:04:45.080 you about. There's been something that came out. It was 0:04:45.160 --> 0:04:47.320 last week, so we're a bit old on the news front. 0:04:47.360 --> 0:04:49.919 But it's important to my life and well not that 0:04:50.000 --> 0:04:51.479 important to your life, but I want to talk about 0:04:51.480 --> 0:04:55.520 it anyway. The Bachelor you might have seen if you've 0:04:55.520 --> 0:04:59.120 been following along the rag trade, The Bachelor has been 0:04:59.160 --> 0:05:01.960 postponed and till next year. And now we kind of 0:05:02.080 --> 0:05:04.760 have been having these conversations for the past few months. 0:05:04.800 --> 0:05:07.719 We assumed this was coming because. 0:05:07.560 --> 0:05:11.719 So my five year anniversary with Matt was three weeks ago, 0:05:11.800 --> 0:05:14.840 which means that it was the final episode of our season. 0:05:15.240 --> 0:05:17.240 It would have aired three or four weeks ago. So 0:05:17.320 --> 0:05:20.720 that's how far behind this year's season of Bachelor is, Like, 0:05:20.760 --> 0:05:22.680 it's come, it's gone. The time period for it to 0:05:22.680 --> 0:05:26.000 be on TV is well untoly passed, except we all 0:05:26.040 --> 0:05:28.560 know that they did all this pre publicity and pre 0:05:28.600 --> 0:05:31.000 promotion for The Bachelor back in like what was it 0:05:31.160 --> 0:05:34.480 April or May or something, and we've got three Bachelors 0:05:34.480 --> 0:05:36.719 this year. It's a new format. It was filmed in 0:05:36.800 --> 0:05:42.719 Queensland and then radio silence crickets, absolute crickets. So I've 0:05:42.760 --> 0:05:45.600 been thinking about things and I have a few feelings 0:05:46.320 --> 0:05:51.800 either the Bachelor's filming, like this season was so monumentally 0:05:51.839 --> 0:05:54.479 shit that they've decided to shift it into next year 0:05:54.920 --> 0:05:57.760 or can it all together? But obviously what's happened? So 0:05:57.800 --> 0:06:00.360 the Love Boat, it's this new reality TV show, dating 0:06:00.360 --> 0:06:01.520 show that Channel ten is putting on. 0:06:01.640 --> 0:06:03.320 Go on a boat, You go on a boat. 0:06:03.680 --> 0:06:05.640 I feel like it's a weird cross between like Love 0:06:05.720 --> 0:06:07.279 Island and Below Deck. 0:06:07.279 --> 0:06:09.920 They've just tried to hybrid the show. Yeah, or just like, 0:06:09.920 --> 0:06:12.760 what are those giant cruise ships? Princess the Princess? What's 0:06:12.800 --> 0:06:15.480 the giant cruise ships? You're telling the story. I've been 0:06:15.520 --> 0:06:18.320 on a docks in Sydney, the biggest guys come on. Okay, 0:06:18.400 --> 0:06:18.880 scrap back. 0:06:21.360 --> 0:06:23.360 What they must have done is they've obviously looked at 0:06:23.360 --> 0:06:25.440 the edits because they're not going to run two romance 0:06:25.440 --> 0:06:28.360 shows back to back. They've obviously looked at the cutdowns 0:06:28.400 --> 0:06:30.960 at the show itself and been like, the love Boat 0:06:31.040 --> 0:06:33.599 has more potential. The love Boat, we think is going 0:06:33.640 --> 0:06:36.240 to rate better than The Bachelor, because if they thought 0:06:36.240 --> 0:06:39.440 The Bachelor was going to be a fucking huge success 0:06:39.480 --> 0:06:41.920 this year, there's no way that they would have parked 0:06:41.920 --> 0:06:44.159 it to an indefinite date in twenty twenty three. 0:06:44.839 --> 0:06:46.880 I also have a lot of feelings come at me. 0:06:47.400 --> 0:06:51.159 I feel like this year, I don't wait when you 0:06:51.200 --> 0:06:52.440 were like, I have a lot of fear feelings. I 0:06:52.440 --> 0:06:54.599 thought you're gonna say no one gives a fuck, and 0:06:54.680 --> 0:06:55.920 I actually think no one does. 0:06:56.120 --> 0:06:57.840 No I care to the point that I want to 0:06:57.839 --> 0:06:59.640 discuss it. This is not keeping me up at night, 0:06:59.760 --> 0:07:03.080 but I think, and it's a big call, but this year, 0:07:03.200 --> 0:07:05.800 I think the Bachelor and the Bachelorette and the Bachelor 0:07:05.960 --> 0:07:08.360 has I think it should have been rested. I think 0:07:08.720 --> 0:07:10.640 this year we needed to have a break from it 0:07:10.720 --> 0:07:14.080 for just one year, twelve months, and then move forward 0:07:14.120 --> 0:07:16.440 into next year with something maybe a little bit fresher 0:07:16.520 --> 0:07:18.560 and new vibe. But I think it was very obvious 0:07:18.600 --> 0:07:22.960 with what was happening in the media, people's reactions, it 0:07:23.000 --> 0:07:25.200 needed to be rested. And turns out it didn't need 0:07:25.240 --> 0:07:27.280 to be wrested because they have decided to rest it. 0:07:27.480 --> 0:07:29.960 The problem is they filmed it, they've shot it, they've 0:07:29.960 --> 0:07:32.200 put the money in, they put months of people's time in. 0:07:32.720 --> 0:07:35.800 There are hopefully three relationships out there now because there's 0:07:35.800 --> 0:07:39.680 three suitors, the three male bachelors this year. Three relationships 0:07:39.720 --> 0:07:42.800 out there now that are supposed to what survive the 0:07:42.880 --> 0:07:47.280 next A twelve month period, potentially a twelve month period 0:07:47.360 --> 0:07:50.640 of a secret relationship. I don't think that is going 0:07:50.680 --> 0:07:52.760 to be possible, So I understand why they're doing it. 0:07:52.840 --> 0:07:55.800 They've decided that, Okay, this is probably not going to 0:07:55.800 --> 0:07:58.880 be received that well this year. Great, I don't think 0:07:58.880 --> 0:08:01.880 it would have been either. Let's put this new love 0:08:01.920 --> 0:08:04.960 show on. Australians love new shows. We love new reality 0:08:05.000 --> 0:08:07.480 TV shows. I love new reality TV shows. Hey, I'm 0:08:07.520 --> 0:08:09.520 on one soon. I think that this sholl be received 0:08:09.600 --> 0:08:11.800 very well. But you've shot yourself in the foot. What 0:08:11.840 --> 0:08:13.880 should have happened is we probably should have waited the 0:08:13.880 --> 0:08:16.480 twelve months and just filmed it next year, because now 0:08:17.080 --> 0:08:20.080 the excitement's gone a little bit. These three bachelors have 0:08:20.120 --> 0:08:23.920 been released way too early. Their relationships are not big call, 0:08:23.960 --> 0:08:26.680 They're not gonna last. I would be so surprised if 0:08:26.680 --> 0:08:28.800 in twelve months time, when it is, any of those 0:08:28.840 --> 0:08:31.840 relationships are still going strong. Because you can't live in secrecy. 0:08:31.960 --> 0:08:34.840 Well, I mean so for anyone who doesn't kind of know, 0:08:35.280 --> 0:08:36.840 and if you if you've been listening to the podcasts 0:08:36.840 --> 0:08:38.240 for a while, you might already know this kind of 0:08:38.240 --> 0:08:40.560 how the setup of the Bachelor works. But Matt and 0:08:40.559 --> 0:08:43.439 I had to keep our relationship secret for about five 0:08:43.480 --> 0:08:46.400 and a half months before filming had started. And it's 0:08:46.559 --> 0:08:48.800 really challenging because it's not so much just keeping your 0:08:48.800 --> 0:08:50.959 relationship secret. It's not like you can sneak across to 0:08:51.000 --> 0:08:54.400 each other's houses because the bachelors have been announced, so 0:08:54.440 --> 0:08:56.640 paparazzi know exactly who the bachelors are. 0:08:56.520 --> 0:08:57.880 So they won't do you like a whok. 0:08:57.960 --> 0:09:00.320 Yeah, and so they're not anonymous anymore. They're not to 0:09:00.360 --> 0:09:04.240 just live their lives in secrecy. So you are literally 0:09:04.280 --> 0:09:06.560 doing six months or five and a half months of 0:09:06.600 --> 0:09:08.360 long distance. That's what Matt and I did. We got 0:09:08.360 --> 0:09:09.880 to see each other a couple of times, but it 0:09:09.920 --> 0:09:13.640 was all organized through Channel ten. There was security guards there. 0:09:13.720 --> 0:09:15.720 It was in a blacked out room. We got driven 0:09:16.200 --> 0:09:19.599 in wigs and coats and like costumes, basically in disguises. 0:09:19.840 --> 0:09:22.360 We got driven out to an airbnb in Richmond. We 0:09:22.400 --> 0:09:24.680 got to stay there for like one night or two nights, 0:09:24.720 --> 0:09:26.959 and it was fully security guarded up. They had all 0:09:26.960 --> 0:09:28.839 the windows blacked out so that no one could take 0:09:28.880 --> 0:09:31.240 photos into the house. And that's how Matt and I 0:09:31.280 --> 0:09:32.719 got to see each other during that five and a 0:09:32.760 --> 0:09:36.560 half month period. Had they made us do a year 0:09:36.960 --> 0:09:40.040 of that situation, I think that the stress, and I'm 0:09:40.080 --> 0:09:42.520 not saying that we wouldn't have worked out, that stress 0:09:43.000 --> 0:09:45.520 and that secrecy would have had a real toll on 0:09:45.600 --> 0:09:48.720 our ability to have a healthy and great relationship. And 0:09:48.760 --> 0:09:50.760 I think that they have as much as The Bachelor, 0:09:51.200 --> 0:09:53.679 because like unlike Maths and some of the other reality 0:09:53.679 --> 0:09:56.200 TV shows, they really care about having the success love 0:09:56.240 --> 0:09:58.120 story at the end of it. But the thing is 0:09:58.120 --> 0:10:00.280 is that they've shot themselves in the foot. They now 0:10:00.360 --> 0:10:03.079 have three suitors, they have an entire season, and the 0:10:03.160 --> 0:10:06.080 likelihood of having any successful relationships off the back of 0:10:06.120 --> 0:10:07.319 it is almost moot. 0:10:07.840 --> 0:10:10.280 I do think that they will still air it, though. 0:10:10.320 --> 0:10:12.600 This is what I don't think they're gonna can it completely. 0:10:12.640 --> 0:10:14.560 When you think of how much when are they gonna 0:10:14.559 --> 0:10:14.800 play it? 0:10:14.800 --> 0:10:17.520 They're going to play it alongside Mass like the Juggernaut. 0:10:17.559 --> 0:10:19.960 Are they gonna Mass starts in January? It's not going 0:10:20.000 --> 0:10:21.920 to go up against Mass. No, it's not going to 0:10:21.960 --> 0:10:23.280 be early in the year, So it'll. 0:10:23.120 --> 0:10:26.400 Be midyear or then it's Lego Masters. No, it'll be 0:10:26.440 --> 0:10:28.960 probably when it usually Yeah, and that's the number one 0:10:29.000 --> 0:10:31.880 chal It'll be what it usually is, which I just think. 0:10:32.000 --> 0:10:33.880 I just don't think they're not going to air it 0:10:33.960 --> 0:10:36.400 at all, because that would be such a huge waste 0:10:36.480 --> 0:10:39.440 of money that let's be real, people in Australian TV, 0:10:39.880 --> 0:10:41.679 they don't have the money to throw away anymore. So 0:10:41.720 --> 0:10:43.880 if they've invested this and all they think of how 0:10:43.960 --> 0:10:46.400 much it would have cost for the production, three months 0:10:46.400 --> 0:10:49.120 worth of everyone that works on it behind the scenes, 0:10:49.160 --> 0:10:52.480 the post processing, the talent, everything like this is a 0:10:52.600 --> 0:10:53.680 very large amount of money. 0:10:53.760 --> 0:10:56.000 So I can't wait to watch The Bachelor at four 0:10:56.040 --> 0:10:58.000 pm in June next year. 0:10:58.280 --> 0:11:02.199 It's gonna be great streaming. The other thing is I 0:11:02.240 --> 0:11:03.640 don't know if you saw this, and I don't know 0:11:03.679 --> 0:11:05.760 if I believe it or not, but one of the 0:11:05.800 --> 0:11:09.320 Bachelor guys was seen online dating. Oh I believe it. 0:11:09.440 --> 0:11:13.280 Recently he got caught out saying well, here's your dating profile. 0:11:13.320 --> 0:11:16.760 Obviously didn't work out, and he then went and said, no, no, 0:11:17.080 --> 0:11:20.240 that's old from before I filmed. I just forgot to 0:11:20.360 --> 0:11:23.160 delete it. But I I think I'm calling their bluff. 0:11:23.480 --> 0:11:25.680 That old chestnut, that's the that's the exact same excuse 0:11:25.720 --> 0:11:28.400 makes boyfriend used to use, yeah, same twenty five times 0:11:29.640 --> 0:11:32.440 it's an old profile. I swear it's dormant. Yes, right, 0:11:32.480 --> 0:11:33.679 well we've all heard that before. 0:11:33.720 --> 0:11:35.319 You know it has active five minutes ago on it. 0:11:35.400 --> 0:11:39.360 Right, All right, let's get into the questions from you guys. 0:11:39.360 --> 0:11:41.800 Thanks everybody who's written in questions today. We have some 0:11:41.960 --> 0:11:44.160 real doozies and a couple that a cad on tricky 0:11:44.200 --> 0:11:44.600 to answer. 0:11:44.640 --> 0:11:47.520 Actually, we're going to give it our best shot. Okay. 0:11:47.679 --> 0:11:51.280 I am going to kick start with last weekend. I 0:11:51.440 --> 0:11:54.680 finally got back into the dating scene after exiting a 0:11:54.760 --> 0:11:58.800 toxic relationship four months ago. Get it, Get it girl. 0:11:59.120 --> 0:12:01.240 The date went pretty well. It was our first time 0:12:01.280 --> 0:12:03.840 meeting after matching on Bumble, and safe to say he 0:12:03.960 --> 0:12:06.640 checked a lot of boxes for a first date. Kind 0:12:06.880 --> 0:12:10.360 good chat, gentlemen, you get my drift. After a few 0:12:10.440 --> 0:12:12.600 drinks together, we made our way back to my house. 0:12:12.880 --> 0:12:15.360 All was going very well. Now I hate to say it, 0:12:15.559 --> 0:12:19.440 but the sex was super, super disappointing, even in the 0:12:19.480 --> 0:12:22.040 morning when we were sober. So we can't even blame 0:12:22.080 --> 0:12:24.640 the fact that we had had some drinks. It just 0:12:24.679 --> 0:12:27.000 felt like a dead starfish was laying on top of 0:12:27.000 --> 0:12:29.960 me and he didn't seem to know the first thing 0:12:30.000 --> 0:12:34.439 about female orgasm. My question is, can you teach someone 0:12:34.559 --> 0:12:38.320 to be good at sex? And is it worth the effort. 0:12:38.440 --> 0:12:41.600 He's twenty eight and I'm twenty five. I just feel 0:12:41.640 --> 0:12:44.599 like he should probably know by now. Hey, maybe he 0:12:44.720 --> 0:12:47.160 was trump. Maybe he nailed it. Maybe he was going 0:12:47.200 --> 0:12:49.719 for the starfish technique and we nailed it. I don't 0:12:49.720 --> 0:12:51.839 think anyone enjoys that, though. Why would you be going 0:12:51.920 --> 0:12:52.120 for that. 0:12:52.200 --> 0:12:56.959 Maybe he okay, yes, you may have been sober after 0:12:57.000 --> 0:12:59.200 the night out. Maybe he wasn't like, maybe he wasn't 0:12:59.240 --> 0:13:01.240 at peak perform It's maybe he can do better. 0:13:01.280 --> 0:13:03.079 I think give him another chance. She did. She said 0:13:03.080 --> 0:13:04.559 in the morning they had sober sex. 0:13:04.480 --> 0:13:06.319 But like it was maybe he wasn't sober. Maybe she 0:13:06.360 --> 0:13:08.120 was feeling sober and he was still really tired. And 0:13:08.120 --> 0:13:11.600 it'd been like, no, we're not throwing him a bone. 0:13:11.720 --> 0:13:13.079 It was just I think. 0:13:13.240 --> 0:13:16.200 I think, if you really like him, and he's great 0:13:16.200 --> 0:13:18.960 in all other aspects, and he is a great, great guy, 0:13:19.720 --> 0:13:22.280 just give it another chance. And if the sex is 0:13:22.480 --> 0:13:25.080 monumentally so bad, because there's only so much that you 0:13:25.080 --> 0:13:28.560 can teach, right, you can't. You can take an eight 0:13:28.600 --> 0:13:30.040 to a ten, and you can take a five to 0:13:30.080 --> 0:13:32.280 a seven. But I don't think you can take a 0:13:32.280 --> 0:13:32.959 five to a ten. 0:13:33.080 --> 0:13:35.880 If the starfish is already deceased, you cannot bring that 0:13:35.920 --> 0:13:38.360 back to life. I can't resuscitate a dead starfish. No, look, 0:13:38.440 --> 0:13:43.000 I'm all jokes aside. You definitely can teach someone sex, 0:13:43.120 --> 0:13:45.520 You can teach someone intimacy. You can teach someone the 0:13:45.600 --> 0:13:48.280 way you like it. And that's the thing. It's it's 0:13:48.360 --> 0:13:52.080 actually not that common to go and have like a 0:13:52.080 --> 0:13:54.000 one night stand or meet someone for the first time 0:13:54.080 --> 0:13:58.400 and it to be explosive, amazing, perfect, perfect fit. You 0:13:58.480 --> 0:14:01.240 both like the same things like that is pretty rare. 0:14:01.320 --> 0:14:03.400 The whole idea is when you meet someone is you'll 0:14:03.559 --> 0:14:05.800 have your moves. Everyone has their key moves, everyone has 0:14:05.800 --> 0:14:08.720 their signature moves. You know what you like. It's different, 0:14:08.800 --> 0:14:10.760 but you need to find the compatibility. You need to 0:14:10.760 --> 0:14:14.000 work together to work out what works well. So I 0:14:14.160 --> 0:14:15.920 one hundred pcent would be giving this guy another go. 0:14:16.080 --> 0:14:19.400 If he was amazing and a gentleman and the chat 0:14:19.440 --> 0:14:21.120 was there and you got along and you actually liked 0:14:21.200 --> 0:14:24.240 him as a human being, go for it again. Let's 0:14:24.240 --> 0:14:27.000 give the guy the benefit of the doubt. Let's think 0:14:27.040 --> 0:14:29.120 that he can do better. Let's think that he can learn. 0:14:29.200 --> 0:14:31.360 And so I think maybe next time you need to 0:14:31.360 --> 0:14:33.480 take the lead. He Maybe don't just let let the 0:14:33.520 --> 0:14:35.360 dead staffish lay on you and crush you to a 0:14:35.400 --> 0:14:38.200 slow death. Take the lead, get up on top. We'll 0:14:38.240 --> 0:14:40.200 do anything. Just try and jazz it up. If you 0:14:40.240 --> 0:14:43.320 put the effort in and you're really trying and he's 0:14:43.360 --> 0:14:45.200 not picking up the signals and he's not doing anything, 0:14:45.240 --> 0:14:47.480 he's not bringing anything to the table. You guys are sober, 0:14:48.160 --> 0:14:51.320 then yeah, maybe this isn't your person. But the question 0:14:51.400 --> 0:14:54.200 is can you teach someone sex? Yes, you can one 0:14:54.280 --> 0:14:57.360 hundred percent get better in a relationship or in friends 0:14:57.400 --> 0:14:59.920 with benefits or whatever. You can one hundred percent get better. 0:15:00.160 --> 0:15:00.720 I do agree. 0:15:00.760 --> 0:15:02.680 I think sex gepts better and better the more you 0:15:02.720 --> 0:15:04.360 know someone and the more you know what they like 0:15:04.440 --> 0:15:06.520 and like how to kind of get them off quickly 0:15:06.560 --> 0:15:07.960 as well, Like you know, you can kind of get 0:15:08.200 --> 0:15:10.160 in the early days you're kind of still sussing each 0:15:10.160 --> 0:15:12.600 other out. And also what a lot of people do 0:15:12.720 --> 0:15:16.160 is they use the moves that they think they're ex liked, 0:15:16.160 --> 0:15:17.680 do you know what I mean? Like they're doing sex 0:15:17.720 --> 0:15:19.760 in a way that has worked for them in the past, 0:15:19.800 --> 0:15:21.760 and maybe that isn't the way that it works for you, 0:15:21.840 --> 0:15:23.960 and that's totally fine. We're all different, we all enjoy 0:15:24.000 --> 0:15:28.680 different things. I think exactly. I agree one hundred percent 0:15:28.720 --> 0:15:31.000 give him another go, and I do think that you 0:15:31.160 --> 0:15:36.720 can improve someone's sexual prowess. However, here's my question, brit 0:15:36.720 --> 0:15:39.520 have you ever had a monumentally dud route that you 0:15:39.640 --> 0:15:42.160 have been able to get them to attend? Like, I 0:15:42.280 --> 0:15:44.080 just don't think I've ever had a situation in my 0:15:44.080 --> 0:15:46.560 life where sex has been so bad and then it's 0:15:46.560 --> 0:15:48.440 gone to a place where it's incredible. 0:15:48.600 --> 0:15:50.920 I have never had it from I haven't had it 0:15:50.920 --> 0:15:53.080 from a dud to a tend, but I've had it 0:15:53.080 --> 0:15:55.440 from not great to a ten. Yeah, one hundred yeah. 0:15:55.440 --> 0:15:57.480 I've dated people like that before, Like you know what, 0:15:57.520 --> 0:15:59.360 You've did it for a couple of months and because 0:15:59.360 --> 0:16:01.720 they just don't get I mean they don't. They have 0:16:01.760 --> 0:16:03.880 to learn what you like and what your groove is 0:16:03.920 --> 0:16:05.720 and once I've one hundred percent done that. But like you, 0:16:05.720 --> 0:16:06.960 guys have to commit and. 0:16:07.080 --> 0:16:10.560 You really like a project. That's what I get. It 0:16:10.560 --> 0:16:13.240 loves the people project. She's like likes to leave men 0:16:13.280 --> 0:16:14.520 better than the way she found them. 0:16:14.560 --> 0:16:16.280 Yeah, so that the next person that finds them has 0:16:16.320 --> 0:16:18.520 like the fucking most amazing relationship ever. Yeah, you are 0:16:18.560 --> 0:16:21.120 welcome everyone out there that is dating my exers. 0:16:22.400 --> 0:16:25.200 Okay, I think yes, Look, give it another go. Don't 0:16:25.240 --> 0:16:27.840 like throw in the towel straight away, have sex a 0:16:27.840 --> 0:16:28.640 few more times. 0:16:28.880 --> 0:16:30.000 Be very verbal. 0:16:30.120 --> 0:16:32.360 Like that's the other thing as well, right, Like, sometimes 0:16:32.360 --> 0:16:33.440 we don't want to ask. 0:16:33.400 --> 0:16:35.280 For what we want in the bedroom because we. 0:16:35.240 --> 0:16:37.520 Feel bitter, uncomfortable or awkward, and we try and do 0:16:37.680 --> 0:16:41.040 more subtle things or try and we try and suggest 0:16:42.000 --> 0:16:43.680 that we want something, but we try and do it 0:16:43.680 --> 0:16:46.360 in a really subtle way, and sometimes subtlety just doesn't work. 0:16:46.640 --> 0:16:48.520 Ask for what you want. If you want them to 0:16:48.520 --> 0:16:50.280 put their hand there, tell them to put their hand there. 0:16:50.280 --> 0:16:51.640 If you want them to put their mouth there, tell 0:16:51.680 --> 0:16:52.680 them to put their mouth there. 0:16:52.760 --> 0:16:56.440 But I understand, and I'm going to say this, there's 0:16:56.440 --> 0:16:58.600 a lot of people out there that don't have the 0:16:58.600 --> 0:17:01.480 confidence to say that even in a relationship yet, let 0:17:01.520 --> 0:17:03.600 alone the early days. So if you don't have the 0:17:03.640 --> 0:17:06.280 confidence to verbally say do this to me, do that 0:17:06.320 --> 0:17:09.639 to me, you can show them without the verbal dialogue. 0:17:09.720 --> 0:17:12.000 You can roll over, or you could just say, let's 0:17:12.040 --> 0:17:15.920 do rollover. Just roll over. You can do the prone staffish. 0:17:16.000 --> 0:17:18.880 You can up super and staffish, prone staffish, sideway stuffish. 0:17:18.920 --> 0:17:20.240 At the end of the day, don't give up on 0:17:20.280 --> 0:17:22.320 this guy. He seems like a nice guy and a gentleman, 0:17:22.400 --> 0:17:24.679