1 00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:04,600 Speaker 1: Well and Woody podcast many third one six y five. 2 00:00:05,240 --> 00:00:08,200 Speaker 1: What quality and other people are you most envious of now? 3 00:00:08,200 --> 00:00:10,000 Speaker 1: I feel like I broke the rules a bit before 4 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:11,680 Speaker 1: because I said good cook, and I feel like that 5 00:00:11,760 --> 00:00:14,400 Speaker 1: might be more of a talent. Oh, I think we 6 00:00:14,760 --> 00:00:18,800 Speaker 1: probably have to be careful about talents versus qualities here. 7 00:00:19,200 --> 00:00:20,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, because you're. 8 00:00:19,840 --> 00:00:21,840 Speaker 3: Gonna go I wish I was incredible at golf, the 9 00:00:21,840 --> 00:00:23,800 Speaker 3: best in the world. And that's not really the conversation. 10 00:00:23,840 --> 00:00:25,520 Speaker 1: We probably wouldn't have taken that girl, But you know 11 00:00:25,640 --> 00:00:28,680 Speaker 1: that's that's exactly the all that we wouldn't take. I 12 00:00:28,720 --> 00:00:30,800 Speaker 1: got a question for you, what about this one? It's 13 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:34,720 Speaker 1: a quality that I seriously admiring people is presence. 14 00:00:35,320 --> 00:00:38,240 Speaker 2: Oh, when you're with a present person, you're. 15 00:00:38,159 --> 00:00:42,280 Speaker 1: With someone who it's like time slows down for them 16 00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:45,120 Speaker 1: when you're you're eating dinner with them or whatever, and 17 00:00:45,200 --> 00:00:48,239 Speaker 1: all they're doing is commenting on things like the flavor 18 00:00:48,920 --> 00:00:52,800 Speaker 1: and the air and like that they're so not that 19 00:00:52,840 --> 00:00:54,440 Speaker 1: they're not their heads not in the clouds. They're like, 20 00:00:54,480 --> 00:00:56,880 Speaker 1: they're just so with you, and it makes them great 21 00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:59,760 Speaker 1: listeners and it means they always know where their time 22 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:03,279 Speaker 1: and tension is as well. So they never unfocused like 23 00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:05,920 Speaker 1: that seems like a superpower when people have got that. 24 00:01:05,959 --> 00:01:08,800 Speaker 2: It's contagious too, when you're around someone like that. 25 00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:09,240 Speaker 4: Yeah. 26 00:01:09,280 --> 00:01:10,760 Speaker 1: Now the reason we're talking about this is it was 27 00:01:10,840 --> 00:01:12,840 Speaker 1: it was a question on a card and esther Perell card. 28 00:01:12,880 --> 00:01:16,480 Speaker 1: She's she's a Belgian therapist who's got a set of 29 00:01:16,480 --> 00:01:18,000 Speaker 1: cards and which I highly recommend. If you want to 30 00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:19,640 Speaker 1: get with your partner, maybe put a link up on 31 00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:20,360 Speaker 1: our Instagram with them. 32 00:01:20,400 --> 00:01:21,600 Speaker 4: What do you go to? Our socials? 33 00:01:21,680 --> 00:01:23,959 Speaker 3: It's called the story starts with or something the story 34 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,520 Speaker 3: begins or something like that. Yeah, it's a great it's 35 00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:27,959 Speaker 3: a great card to flip over at dinner. 36 00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:31,120 Speaker 2: You sit there, have a dinner and flip over to 37 00:01:31,480 --> 00:01:33,200 Speaker 2: where should we begin? 38 00:01:33,400 --> 00:01:37,440 Speaker 3: That's it, Tash or Tash. What's a trait that you 39 00:01:37,440 --> 00:01:38,440 Speaker 3: you get envy yourself? 40 00:01:39,680 --> 00:01:45,679 Speaker 4: I get envious when people are extremely empathetic. Oh yeah, 41 00:01:45,920 --> 00:01:48,360 Speaker 4: it ties into what you were saying earlier. Will I 42 00:01:48,440 --> 00:01:52,320 Speaker 4: struggle When it's a big situation, such as like if 43 00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:54,640 Speaker 4: a vivid the lose a family member or a friend 44 00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:57,400 Speaker 4: or a pet, I can really emphasize that and feel 45 00:01:57,440 --> 00:01:59,880 Speaker 4: what they're feeling. But when it comes to things that 46 00:02:00,080 --> 00:02:01,880 Speaker 4: I feel like it's crying over spilt milk, but it's 47 00:02:01,880 --> 00:02:03,600 Speaker 4: a big deal to them. I tend to just sit 48 00:02:03,640 --> 00:02:06,000 Speaker 4: there and get really awkward and I can't empathize with 49 00:02:06,040 --> 00:02:10,679 Speaker 4: what they're talking about. Wow, I really struggle with it. 50 00:02:10,680 --> 00:02:11,760 Speaker 4: It's difficult, I. 51 00:02:11,720 --> 00:02:16,160 Speaker 1: Mean, like to actually like hear them when they're when 52 00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:18,240 Speaker 1: you feel like they're making a fuss over nothing. 53 00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:22,080 Speaker 4: Yes, yeah, it's something I've been trying to improve on. 54 00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:24,840 Speaker 4: But I really find it difficult if they're you know, 55 00:02:24,919 --> 00:02:27,359 Speaker 4: if they're having a bad day and they get really 56 00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:29,120 Speaker 4: upset about it, I kind of sit there. I get 57 00:02:29,120 --> 00:02:31,040 Speaker 4: really awkward when people cry in front of me because 58 00:02:31,080 --> 00:02:34,600 Speaker 4: I don't cry ever. Wow, when people when I see 59 00:02:34,639 --> 00:02:38,240 Speaker 4: people being empathetic, I really get jealous of it because 60 00:02:38,240 --> 00:02:40,520 Speaker 4: I wish that I could be the same, If that 61 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:41,040 Speaker 4: makes sense. 62 00:02:41,120 --> 00:02:43,040 Speaker 2: It's a great one, Tash, I'm sure. I'm sure. 63 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:44,800 Speaker 3: It just that's probably just because TSH has been like 64 00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:47,160 Speaker 3: it as a kid, like just to like talk to 65 00:02:47,240 --> 00:02:49,040 Speaker 3: like get over it, get over on. And then when 66 00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:51,079 Speaker 3: you see people that aren't doing that, it's funny how 67 00:02:51,200 --> 00:02:51,920 Speaker 3: you treat them. 68 00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:54,000 Speaker 2: The way that you were treated. Yeah, I think not 69 00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:55,080 Speaker 2: to fully unpacked. 70 00:02:54,840 --> 00:02:57,040 Speaker 1: But well to talk about a little bit more like's 71 00:02:57,600 --> 00:03:00,560 Speaker 1: if we can keep backing in a really good one 72 00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:02,560 Speaker 1: because a button push to Tommy said this to me 73 00:03:02,600 --> 00:03:04,679 Speaker 1: the other day, and I think he was banging on 74 00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:07,600 Speaker 1: is when someone is going through something shit. I think 75 00:03:07,639 --> 00:03:10,000 Speaker 1: a lot of the time what we try and do 76 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:12,160 Speaker 1: is you're either dismissive of it or you try and 77 00:03:12,160 --> 00:03:14,400 Speaker 1: put it in perspective. And I think one of the 78 00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:16,200 Speaker 1: best things you can do is just say to someone 79 00:03:16,560 --> 00:03:20,520 Speaker 1: that really sucks. I don't know if you've tried that, Tash, 80 00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:22,840 Speaker 1: but without trying to fix it or dismissed it, just 81 00:03:22,840 --> 00:03:25,119 Speaker 1: just like looking in the eye and just going, hey, 82 00:03:25,120 --> 00:03:27,680 Speaker 1: that sucks for you right now, I reckon, That's nearly 83 00:03:27,720 --> 00:03:29,600 Speaker 1: the best thing you can do, and that will hopefully 84 00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:32,600 Speaker 1: get you into a place of empathy. So thanks to 85 00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:34,080 Speaker 1: the format, I'm sure there are lots of people that 86 00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:36,520 Speaker 1: are listening that are same as that. It's not nice 87 00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:39,080 Speaker 1: to not be able to feel what someone's feeling, is it. 88 00:03:39,080 --> 00:03:39,640 Speaker 4: It's weird. 89 00:03:39,760 --> 00:03:40,600 Speaker 1: That's a great point. 90 00:03:41,040 --> 00:03:43,840 Speaker 2: Totally feel awkward. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 91 00:03:43,680 --> 00:03:47,200 Speaker 3: That's got a Charlie charalais what's a trait that you're 92 00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:48,000 Speaker 3: envy yourself? 93 00:03:48,880 --> 00:03:53,080 Speaker 5: Hi, I am so envious of people who just don't 94 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:54,880 Speaker 5: give a crap what people say about them. 95 00:03:55,120 --> 00:03:57,640 Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, that's bad. 96 00:03:57,720 --> 00:03:58,720 Speaker 1: Yeah, that is bad. 97 00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:01,760 Speaker 5: I work in like a far food chain and like, 98 00:04:01,880 --> 00:04:05,720 Speaker 5: I can't do it. It's the customers and even my 99 00:04:06,240 --> 00:04:09,840 Speaker 5: team members and my managers, Like if they say something, 100 00:04:09,880 --> 00:04:11,080 Speaker 5: it just puts me on a spiral. 101 00:04:11,520 --> 00:04:13,960 Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, and it's just going to feel like that, 102 00:04:14,080 --> 00:04:16,680 Speaker 1: isn't it. Charlie's not somebody, you know it. You know 103 00:04:16,720 --> 00:04:19,039 Speaker 1: that you're spiraling as well, and that's hurt me. And 104 00:04:19,040 --> 00:04:21,280 Speaker 1: now I'm acting like I'm hurt and I wish I wasn't. 105 00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:23,840 Speaker 3: This This came up in mem and I my partner 106 00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:25,880 Speaker 3: and I'm playing this game, and this discussion came up 107 00:04:25,880 --> 00:04:28,720 Speaker 3: on caring so much about what people think. If Charlie's you, 108 00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:30,960 Speaker 3: actually I've only just met you, but you sound like 109 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:34,000 Speaker 3: a really beautiful, warm, kind person. I would argue though, 110 00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:37,039 Speaker 3: that if you didn't care so much about what people thought, 111 00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:40,000 Speaker 3: you might not be that person. And I know it 112 00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:42,200 Speaker 3: hurts when you're when you're caring so much about what 113 00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:44,720 Speaker 3: people think, but keep in mind that actually having that 114 00:04:44,839 --> 00:04:47,680 Speaker 3: care is kind of makes you a great person as well. 115 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:50,160 Speaker 2: At times. Charale's yeah, good point. 116 00:04:50,240 --> 00:04:52,320 Speaker 4: I didn't think about it. 117 00:04:52,320 --> 00:04:53,680 Speaker 1: It's a really really good way. 118 00:04:53,760 --> 00:04:55,839 Speaker 2: Actually can show too far, but yeah. 119 00:04:55,760 --> 00:04:59,160 Speaker 1: There's a there's a really good I'm not sure if 120 00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:02,240 Speaker 1: you cross who Bonniever is, but there's a I remember 121 00:05:02,279 --> 00:05:04,400 Speaker 1: watching him as a clip of him doing a cover 122 00:05:04,440 --> 00:05:06,560 Speaker 1: of the song I Can't Make You Love Me on YouTube. 123 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:08,719 Speaker 1: You want to check that out, And the top comment 124 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:13,479 Speaker 1: on that clip is someone just saying, like, who hurt you, Bonniever? 125 00:05:13,680 --> 00:05:16,720 Speaker 1: Like you hurt more beautifully than anyone else. And I 126 00:05:16,760 --> 00:05:19,680 Speaker 1: was always inspired by that because I have often bruised 127 00:05:19,680 --> 00:05:21,600 Speaker 1: like a peach and thought exactly what you said. Would Yeah, 128 00:05:21,640 --> 00:05:25,240 Speaker 1: that's a really shit quality of mine. But people that 129 00:05:25,440 --> 00:05:29,600 Speaker 1: hurt beautifully often make the best artists and the most 130 00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:31,520 Speaker 1: beautiful people, the most beautiful people. 131 00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:33,839 Speaker 2: Yeah, And if you didn't have that, would you just 132 00:05:33,839 --> 00:05:35,640 Speaker 2: be a bit of a prick? If you really didn't 133 00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:37,159 Speaker 2: kill anyone thought, would you just carry on like a 134 00:05:37,160 --> 00:05:38,479 Speaker 2: bit of a prick? I don't know. Let's go to 135 00:05:38,520 --> 00:05:41,000 Speaker 2: Yana here, Yana, what's a trade? Your ens? 136 00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:41,599 Speaker 1: Great question. 137 00:05:42,440 --> 00:05:45,880 Speaker 5: I'm an MVS or people who are very well versed 138 00:05:45,920 --> 00:05:48,640 Speaker 5: and about the events around the world and just knowing 139 00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:50,919 Speaker 5: really random thing everything. 140 00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:53,520 Speaker 2: Oh will Will's got that in spades. Far away. Will 141 00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:55,919 Speaker 2: give us a give us a fact from around the world. 142 00:05:57,080 --> 00:05:57,800 Speaker 2: He's very good at this. 143 00:05:57,839 --> 00:06:01,480 Speaker 1: Come on, New York is sinking by one to two 144 00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:04,719 Speaker 1: millimeters a day a year, I should say, at the moment, 145 00:06:04,839 --> 00:06:07,800 Speaker 1: just so you know, there you Yana, But Yana, are 146 00:06:07,839 --> 00:06:11,240 Speaker 1: we talking a we're talking just fun facts here? Are 147 00:06:11,240 --> 00:06:14,599 Speaker 1: We're talking like global politics that sort of thing. 148 00:06:16,480 --> 00:06:18,120 Speaker 4: More about global politics? 149 00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:21,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, See Woods is great at that. See 150 00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:22,640 Speaker 1: what's going on in China at the moment. 151 00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:28,640 Speaker 3: It didn't and h we don't have time and we're 152 00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:31,200 Speaker 3: out of hear more of the boys on the Full 153 00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:34,039 Speaker 3: Show podcast, all on the iHeartRadio app. 154 00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:35,960 Speaker 1: Oh wherever get your podcast.