WEBVTT - REAL REALITY - MARRIED AT FIRST SIGHT - JOHN AIKEN 0:00:00.200 --> 0:00:01.760 It's in the news today, but it was actually on 0:00:01.840 --> 0:00:04.480 TV Reload the podcast past week that one. Hey guys, 0:00:04.480 --> 0:00:07.680 welcome back to TV Reload, Thank you for clicking and downloading. 0:00:07.680 --> 0:00:10.480 On today's episode with John Aiken, we will be talking 0:00:10.520 --> 0:00:13.600 about Married at First side, of course, and his role 0:00:13.680 --> 0:00:17.040 as a relationship expert. Married at First Sight, or as 0:00:17.160 --> 0:00:20.040 most of us call it, Maths has launched this new 0:00:20.160 --> 0:00:23.439 series with a new selection of singles or Willing to 0:00:23.520 --> 0:00:26.160 Marry a Complete Stranger? I mean, as if we weren't 0:00:26.160 --> 0:00:29.280 going to all watch. We have seen four weddings so far, 0:00:29.480 --> 0:00:32.760 one memorial, a disastrous honeymoon, and at this stage all 0:00:32.800 --> 0:00:35.480 the glasses seem to be used for drinking. Not one 0:00:35.560 --> 0:00:38.960 person has thrown a drink. However, apparently for one bride 0:00:39.000 --> 0:00:41.879 the tequila wasn't good enough. There is so much to 0:00:41.960 --> 0:00:44.520 unpack with John. What he thinks of the twenty twenty 0:00:44.520 --> 0:00:48.720 four married couples, why groomed Tim didn't interrupt that disastrous 0:00:48.760 --> 0:00:51.720 best man speech, what he thinks of Lucinda Light and 0:00:51.800 --> 0:00:56.400 her wingwoman crazy, if producers go too hard with grief 0:00:56.440 --> 0:01:00.920 stricken participants, and if those celebrants are real Prince I 0:01:01.000 --> 0:01:04.200 will ask John if in the history of being told 0:01:04.240 --> 0:01:07.959 to calm down, if anyone has actually ever calmed down, 0:01:08.080 --> 0:01:09.720 I'd like to know his take on that turn of 0:01:09.800 --> 0:01:13.320 phrase in an argument. Anyway, let's bring John into the podcast. 0:01:13.480 --> 0:01:16.399 So sit back and relax as we dive just that 0:01:16.640 --> 0:01:20.440 little bit deeper into the world of Australian television. Do 0:01:20.480 --> 0:01:23.319 you know what was really funny? I was watching Maths 0:01:23.400 --> 0:01:25.480 and I was the person who was watching it with 0:01:25.560 --> 0:01:28.199 said John is so good on this show, but don't 0:01:28.200 --> 0:01:31.399 you think he looks like someone? And the person they said, 0:01:31.440 --> 0:01:33.520 you look like who's your double ganger? I don't know 0:01:33.560 --> 0:01:35.720 if you've ever heard this before, and I'm really worried 0:01:35.800 --> 0:01:38.120 that it might upset you. But has anyone ever said 0:01:38.120 --> 0:01:41.600 you look like the penguin from the original Batman TV series? 0:01:41.880 --> 0:01:43.520 I don't know if that's a good thing. Is that 0:01:43.560 --> 0:01:44.840 a good thing? Ellen? No? 0:01:44.880 --> 0:01:47.480 Because no, no, no, because the penguin back then was not 0:01:47.800 --> 0:01:51.040 the big penguin like Danny DeVito. He was quite slim. 0:01:51.160 --> 0:01:53.720 He was, I mean, he did have a nasty. 0:01:54.040 --> 0:01:55.600 I might have to google an image right now. 0:01:55.760 --> 0:01:57.440 No, do you know what everyone has listening to this 0:01:57.480 --> 0:01:59.760 will be like, did you just say to John that 0:01:59.840 --> 0:02:02.000 he is the penguin, and they're gonna be like he 0:02:02.120 --> 0:02:04.000 went there. I know, but you know what, sometimes you 0:02:04.040 --> 0:02:05.360 want to hear these silly things. 0:02:05.440 --> 0:02:07.760 I think I totally agree. And you know what, when 0:02:07.800 --> 0:02:10.440 we talk, you get down to the honest true we do. 0:02:10.840 --> 0:02:12.760 I sped image. 0:02:13.040 --> 0:02:16.040 I've gone images. I mean, oh my god. 0:02:15.960 --> 0:02:17.680 Look at it. At the end of the podcast, we'll 0:02:17.720 --> 0:02:20.040 circle back to it. Welcome back to the podcast again. 0:02:20.080 --> 0:02:21.720 Though it is great to be here, Ben. 0:02:21.880 --> 0:02:25.040 I love the last time we spoke, and this time's 0:02:25.080 --> 0:02:27.880 even better because I get to see you in person, 0:02:28.040 --> 0:02:29.880 well on screen at least, of course. 0:02:29.919 --> 0:02:31.600 Of course. You know what was interesting was the other 0:02:31.680 --> 0:02:33.400 day when we were watching we watched a preview of 0:02:33.400 --> 0:02:35.480 the first episode for People who isn't It? And I 0:02:35.600 --> 0:02:37.600 told you that you ranked in the top three of 0:02:37.639 --> 0:02:41.000 the podcast. So I've got those names for you. Claudia 0:02:41.040 --> 0:02:43.079 Carvon was number one, as she's big, you know what 0:02:43.080 --> 0:02:45.720 I mean, like, can't beat Claudia Cuhen and you were 0:02:45.800 --> 0:02:48.680 number two, which is great, and number three was George 0:02:48.680 --> 0:02:50.919 from Survivor. So I don't know how that lands for you. 0:02:51.720 --> 0:02:54.560 Okay, okay, well, I mean I'll take it. 0:02:54.720 --> 0:02:57.600 I think we can all say that Claudia's a runaway, 0:02:57.800 --> 0:02:58.000 you know. 0:02:58.080 --> 0:02:58.600 Number one. 0:02:58.880 --> 0:03:03.200 I turned for Claudia. She's got the wrong climbing for me. 0:03:03.280 --> 0:03:05.239 But you know, come on, she's not eight. 0:03:05.840 --> 0:03:07.160 You know she's still amazing. 0:03:07.240 --> 0:03:09.160 I actually sat next to her at the movies. Anyway, 0:03:09.160 --> 0:03:11.280 that's a boring story. I'm not going to tell that story. 0:03:11.320 --> 0:03:13.480 I'll tell that for another time. But we're back. What 0:03:13.720 --> 0:03:16.800 was your reaction to watching the episode last night? I 0:03:16.840 --> 0:03:19.919 know you'd already seen it, but as Australia was watching it, 0:03:20.000 --> 0:03:22.480 I imagine you were watching it along with them. What 0:03:22.680 --> 0:03:23.240 was a reaction. 0:03:23.560 --> 0:03:26.120 Yes, well, I'll paint the scene. I'm sitting there with 0:03:26.160 --> 0:03:32.560 my wife. We are drinking wine and we're basically sort 0:03:32.600 --> 0:03:36.440 of watching it unfold. She doesn't know what's coming, but 0:03:36.600 --> 0:03:39.560 she is loving every minute of it. And I'm kind 0:03:39.560 --> 0:03:42.520 of looking at Twitter, sort of getting a sense of 0:03:43.040 --> 0:03:45.800 what's coming through and what the public are saying. 0:03:46.000 --> 0:03:49.640 And you know, I wasn't sure, to be honest, Ben, initially. 0:03:49.160 --> 0:03:52.560 Because it's a very relatable class cast, but they're quite 0:03:52.600 --> 0:03:55.040 different from last year, and so I was really keen 0:03:55.040 --> 0:03:58.200 to see what the audience was saying and who they 0:03:58.200 --> 0:04:01.480 were responding to. But it really pleased me that they 0:04:01.480 --> 0:04:06.200 were kind of getting invested. Particularly I noticed on Cassandra's story, 0:04:06.240 --> 0:04:08.280 you know, she had that last early on and now 0:04:08.320 --> 0:04:11.040 she was diving back into love. And Tristan is such 0:04:11.080 --> 0:04:14.440 a kind, warm and at times very awkward guy. 0:04:14.800 --> 0:04:16.520 So it was good feedback for me. 0:04:16.839 --> 0:04:20.000 Yeah. Well, I mean, I guess when it comes to 0:04:20.040 --> 0:04:22.320 doing a new series, John, do you do a factory 0:04:22.360 --> 0:04:25.080 reset on what you've seen the year before? Because we 0:04:25.120 --> 0:04:27.680 do see different characters every year. We're not seeing the 0:04:27.720 --> 0:04:29.919 same thing because if we saw that, Mass wouldn't be 0:04:30.000 --> 0:04:32.960 number one, you know with the ratings, and so I 0:04:33.000 --> 0:04:35.040 wonder how you do that, Like do you just go, 0:04:35.120 --> 0:04:36.960 I'm going to forget all of the personalities I saw 0:04:37.000 --> 0:04:38.880 this year and just come in with a fresh take, 0:04:38.960 --> 0:04:41.520 Like how do you evolve with these new personalities? 0:04:41.600 --> 0:04:43.800 Well, that's kind of exactly what I do. I do. 0:04:44.200 --> 0:04:48.040 I put aside the previous seasons and I just say 0:04:48.760 --> 0:04:51.960 I'm going to watch now and be surprised. I think 0:04:52.000 --> 0:04:56.080 when the when the show first started and became really popular, 0:04:56.440 --> 0:04:58.520 I was worried initially that, you know, how do we 0:04:58.640 --> 0:05:02.000 keep evolving, how do we keep the interest going? Because 0:05:02.000 --> 0:05:04.800 it's a relationship show, it's talking heads on a couch. 0:05:05.080 --> 0:05:07.080 You know, what in the world is going to keep 0:05:07.120 --> 0:05:11.680 people coming back? But then I realized by about series five, oh. 0:05:11.240 --> 0:05:12.040 It's the cast. 0:05:12.360 --> 0:05:17.080 And the cast always change because they always have different backstories, 0:05:17.279 --> 0:05:21.640 different problem patterns, they have different family and friends. I mean, 0:05:21.640 --> 0:05:25.040 we saw last night the best Man's speech from Hell. 0:05:25.440 --> 0:05:29.200 You know, it constantly keeps evolving, and all I've got 0:05:29.240 --> 0:05:32.160 to do is sit and watch it, and it surprises. 0:05:31.640 --> 0:05:32.600 Me every year. 0:05:32.839 --> 0:05:35.520 Yeah, it does. I mean, we'll talk about that speech 0:05:35.520 --> 0:05:37.000 in a second. But I kind of feel like, you know, 0:05:37.040 --> 0:05:39.960 the show penetrates the audience in a way that no 0:05:40.120 --> 0:05:43.480 other show has ever connected, especially a dating show. I mean, 0:05:43.520 --> 0:05:46.360 what is it about maths that resonates with a straight. 0:05:46.200 --> 0:05:47.080 On Well, I'll tell you what. 0:05:47.120 --> 0:05:48.719 I'll tell you my answer, but then I want to 0:05:48.720 --> 0:05:52.680 hear yours, because you have lived and bathe the reality world, 0:05:53.839 --> 0:05:56.240 and I'd be curious to know your take on it. 0:05:56.600 --> 0:05:59.520 From my point of view, I think there's a number 0:05:59.600 --> 0:06:03.159 of ingredients that make it successful. One is, obviously this 0:06:03.320 --> 0:06:06.640 idea of the fairy tale. Can two strangers fall in love? 0:06:06.960 --> 0:06:09.520 That's at the core, and that's compelling to watch, you know, 0:06:09.560 --> 0:06:12.000 when they turn around, the eyes lock. Do they like 0:06:12.080 --> 0:06:15.680 each other? I think in a strange way. Now people 0:06:15.760 --> 0:06:20.120 watch it to learn things about relationships, particularly learn what 0:06:20.200 --> 0:06:23.679 not to do, which is a very valuable way of learning. 0:06:23.880 --> 0:06:25.760 It's just a bit different. And then I think you've 0:06:25.800 --> 0:06:30.960 got the experts who we get in this combative, sort 0:06:31.000 --> 0:06:35.960 of accountable role with the participants and they come back 0:06:36.000 --> 0:06:38.760 at as hard, and I think that's very interesting for 0:06:38.800 --> 0:06:40.800 people to watch, and you don't often see that on 0:06:40.880 --> 0:06:44.920 reality TV. There's John and you know the guy sitting 0:06:44.920 --> 0:06:48.520 across from him, he's coming at me hard. Harrison said, 0:06:48.520 --> 0:06:50.560 I was full of it last year, and that is 0:06:50.680 --> 0:06:54.600 unusual to watch that and really quite interesting and certainly 0:06:54.600 --> 0:06:56.440 exciting for me to be on the receiving end of it. 0:06:56.920 --> 0:06:59.919 And I also think, strangely enough, i'd say this Ben 0:07:00.080 --> 0:07:02.240 people have said to me that it reminds them of 0:07:02.320 --> 0:07:02.920 high school. 0:07:03.080 --> 0:07:05.720 So when they watch it, they've taken back. 0:07:05.520 --> 0:07:08.360 In time to when they're thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, and they've 0:07:08.360 --> 0:07:11.080 got these little clicks, and they've also had their heart 0:07:11.120 --> 0:07:13.800 broking it broken at sixteen, and they watch someone getting 0:07:13.880 --> 0:07:16.880 dumped or they've been cheated on, or they've gone out 0:07:16.880 --> 0:07:20.400 with a guy who promised the world and absolutely left 0:07:20.440 --> 0:07:24.160 them heartbroken. All of that just reminds them of when 0:07:24.160 --> 0:07:27.080 they were young, and they are invested in it, and 0:07:27.120 --> 0:07:29.120 I think that would be the way I'd answer it. 0:07:29.520 --> 0:07:31.960 A whole lot of ingredients, but there are four ones 0:07:32.040 --> 0:07:34.320 there that I think are compelling. 0:07:34.560 --> 0:07:36.880 Yeah. I think the thing for me is I believe 0:07:36.920 --> 0:07:39.880 that all of us want to see ourselves reflected back 0:07:39.880 --> 0:07:42.520 to us when we watch television. We want to watch 0:07:42.520 --> 0:07:45.920 ourselves in some weird way and resonate with them and 0:07:45.960 --> 0:07:48.440 connect with that and think about ourselves and think, you know, 0:07:48.760 --> 0:07:51.040 what would I do if I'm in that situation. And 0:07:51.440 --> 0:07:55.560 we're as humans, we all believe that we're entitled to love. 0:07:55.680 --> 0:07:58.240 We all want to find love, and this show will 0:07:58.320 --> 0:08:01.840 be resonating with audio answers and rating really high as 0:08:01.880 --> 0:08:04.480 long as we see a true reflection of society. And 0:08:04.560 --> 0:08:06.920 I think that Maths isn't a show about a whole 0:08:06.920 --> 0:08:09.280 bunch of people with washboard abs. Sure, a couple of 0:08:09.280 --> 0:08:12.200 them have got it. You know, some people might be 0:08:12.240 --> 0:08:14.000 there for the boobs and the big lips and all 0:08:14.000 --> 0:08:16.440 the right kind of stuff. But what the casting does 0:08:16.480 --> 0:08:19.520 really well with this show is it actually represents a 0:08:19.600 --> 0:08:23.280 large part of Australia, very real Australians, even if they 0:08:23.280 --> 0:08:24.800 are Liscinda. 0:08:24.440 --> 0:08:26.000 Light, that's exactly right. 0:08:26.480 --> 0:08:29.160 And I do think like some people have obviously stopped 0:08:29.200 --> 0:08:31.320 me over the years and said, these people aren't real. 0:08:31.520 --> 0:08:34.680 Surely not, it must be scripted. But you are right. 0:08:34.880 --> 0:08:37.120 They are real people. You may not bump into them 0:08:37.160 --> 0:08:39.480 all the time, but they are out there. They are 0:08:39.480 --> 0:08:43.160 doing these things, making these poor choices China fall in 0:08:43.200 --> 0:08:47.720 love and doing it terribly, and that's really intriguing when 0:08:47.720 --> 0:08:49.760 you watch that. And I think the other thing that's 0:08:49.840 --> 0:08:53.080 really fascinating, and it still fascinates me, is that when 0:08:53.120 --> 0:08:55.760 you hold a mirror up to them and say here's 0:08:55.800 --> 0:08:59.040 what's going on now, you need to do better, often. 0:08:58.800 --> 0:09:01.560 They just say, well, I'm sorry, John, but you're wrong. 0:09:01.760 --> 0:09:04.760 And the audience is watching going, oh no, no, no, no, 0:09:04.920 --> 0:09:06.000 you do need to change. 0:09:06.000 --> 0:09:07.000 But they are fixed. 0:09:07.800 --> 0:09:10.040 They have blinkers on and there's no insight, and that 0:09:10.240 --> 0:09:15.720 is really challenging and very interesting to watch when you 0:09:15.760 --> 0:09:16.960 get into that situation. 0:09:17.240 --> 0:09:20.640 It's juicy. Liscinda Light, though, is actually one of the 0:09:20.679 --> 0:09:24.920 most bonkers participants Mass has ever seen. But I actually 0:09:25.200 --> 0:09:28.760 really love her and I feel like Mass does this 0:09:28.800 --> 0:09:32.280 thing very well, which is at baits and switches how 0:09:32.600 --> 0:09:35.080 we are going to interpret people. And so when you 0:09:35.160 --> 0:09:38.840 see Liscinda to start with, you will think that woman's bonkers. 0:09:39.480 --> 0:09:42.400 But I actually believe that Australia is going to fall 0:09:42.400 --> 0:09:45.280 in love with her. I actually think that she's quite brilliant. 0:09:45.559 --> 0:09:47.839 Yeah, I agree, and I take your point. I think 0:09:47.880 --> 0:09:51.520 when you're putting together a selection of different individuals, you 0:09:51.600 --> 0:09:55.920 want complexity, you want layers and texture, and I think 0:09:55.960 --> 0:09:58.160 we've got that this year, particularly with the diversity of 0:09:58.160 --> 0:10:02.600 the cast. It's very fascinating when you see, let's say, 0:10:02.640 --> 0:10:06.840 a personal trainer who's ripped, who looks like he's a player, 0:10:07.160 --> 0:10:10.840 and you make that first impression and then you watch 0:10:10.960 --> 0:10:14.880 this person then show different sides to themselves as the 0:10:14.920 --> 0:10:19.640 experiment plays out. That is something that is a secret 0:10:19.679 --> 0:10:22.120 source to the show, that you have all these different 0:10:22.160 --> 0:10:25.920 personalities showing different sides. And sometimes it's right off the bat, 0:10:27.080 --> 0:10:30.000 but sometimes it's halfway through when you least expect it. 0:10:30.080 --> 0:10:33.240 This big personality comes out of this big rivalry occurs, 0:10:34.120 --> 0:10:37.520 or suddenly they don't commit when you really thought there 0:10:37.520 --> 0:10:40.600 are hands on, rock solid commitment type. 0:10:40.720 --> 0:10:43.360 It's interesting when you were talking about looking on Twitter 0:10:43.400 --> 0:10:45.600 last night, X is what they call it now, looking 0:10:45.600 --> 0:10:47.840 on Yeah? Yeah, the people looking at I was doing 0:10:47.840 --> 0:10:49.520 the same thing. And there was quite a few people 0:10:49.520 --> 0:10:52.720 talking about does this show play family tragedy too hard? 0:10:53.000 --> 0:10:54.640 And there are a lot of setups. We saw that 0:10:54.679 --> 0:10:59.240 with Cassandra and hers backstory was heartbreaking. What are your 0:10:59.280 --> 0:11:02.560 thoughts on getting contestants participants I should say, to be 0:11:02.559 --> 0:11:05.200 a part of this show when they've had such tragedy 0:11:05.240 --> 0:11:08.679 in their life? Are they broken people? Are they should 0:11:08.679 --> 0:11:10.400 they not be put on a show like this? 0:11:10.960 --> 0:11:12.720 I don't think that they're broken. 0:11:12.920 --> 0:11:17.400 I think there's certainly people that have I guess experiences 0:11:17.440 --> 0:11:21.080 are past that have you know, essentially shaped them. But 0:11:21.200 --> 0:11:24.400 to your point earlier, I mean it makes these people 0:11:24.840 --> 0:11:28.920 real and it allows the audience to invest more in them. 0:11:29.120 --> 0:11:32.160 And I think of reality shows outside of this, you know, 0:11:32.640 --> 0:11:36.360 where you might be meeting someone who's about to audition 0:11:36.559 --> 0:11:39.280 for a singing contest and you see what they've. 0:11:39.080 --> 0:11:40.920 Been through and the family and the. 0:11:40.920 --> 0:11:42.520 Lost and all that sort of stuff, and there's that 0:11:42.640 --> 0:11:44.480 sense of well, I'm going to ride this with them, 0:11:44.600 --> 0:11:48.600 And so I think it's a reality television sort of 0:11:48.640 --> 0:11:51.880 format point where you are really trying to get the 0:11:51.960 --> 0:11:56.120 audience to know who it is that's in front of you, 0:11:56.360 --> 0:12:00.439 and it gives you an understanding, a deeper understand and 0:12:00.920 --> 0:12:02.800 a faster way of getting to know them. But I 0:12:02.800 --> 0:12:07.480 would also say that you know they are very well assessed. 0:12:07.040 --> 0:12:08.679 And they're aut a task. 0:12:09.960 --> 0:12:11.160 They know what they know. 0:12:11.640 --> 0:12:14.120 I mean, we're now season eleven, so they've watched it all, 0:12:14.320 --> 0:12:18.080 They've gone through pyite tests, they are trained with social media, 0:12:18.320 --> 0:12:19.240 and we prepare. 0:12:18.920 --> 0:12:21.120 Them as best we can that they are going to 0:12:21.120 --> 0:12:22.040 be able to cope with it. 0:12:22.080 --> 0:12:25.680 But it is very, very intense when that spotlights on them. 0:12:25.720 --> 0:12:25.840 Well. 0:12:25.880 --> 0:12:28.199 I thought with Timothy, it was really lovely about him, 0:12:28.200 --> 0:12:30.880 who's matched with Lycinda, was that he as well, was 0:12:31.120 --> 0:12:32.960 not who you kind of expected him to be. And 0:12:33.000 --> 0:12:35.920 when he revealed that his whole family was not there 0:12:35.960 --> 0:12:38.240 at the wedding because they were dead, what I thought 0:12:38.320 --> 0:12:41.920 was really quite compelling about that was Lucinda's ability to 0:12:41.960 --> 0:12:46.120 take that in her stride and to be able to 0:12:46.200 --> 0:12:48.480 process that in a really human way, in a really 0:12:48.480 --> 0:12:51.120 empathetic way, And it makes me think of who I 0:12:51.160 --> 0:12:53.600 am in the real world when someone says something like that, 0:12:53.640 --> 0:12:56.720 which is quite heavy and how to better myself in 0:12:56.800 --> 0:13:00.200 being able to communicate because she did that so well. 0:13:00.280 --> 0:13:02.719 Yeah, that is a really good point about her. 0:13:02.800 --> 0:13:07.120 I think she's the most emotionally evolved person certainly we've 0:13:07.160 --> 0:13:10.840 had in this series, but also throughout all the eleventh seasons. 0:13:10.840 --> 0:13:14.120 When you watch her in different situations of high conflict 0:13:14.360 --> 0:13:19.160 or betrayal or heartbreak, her ability to immediately go in 0:13:19.559 --> 0:13:22.920 and say the right thing at the right time, to. 0:13:23.040 --> 0:13:27.320 Hold the space as she says, you know and look frequently. 0:13:27.320 --> 0:13:30.200 There were times when I was telling off participants in 0:13:30.280 --> 0:13:33.600 the commitment ceremony and then over my shoulder Lucinda would say, John, 0:13:33.600 --> 0:13:37.000 can I just jump in here? Can I just you know, 0:13:37.320 --> 0:13:40.560 have a different way of looking at this? And you 0:13:40.679 --> 0:13:43.360 kind of realize this is part of her DNA And 0:13:43.400 --> 0:13:46.600 when people would say, oh, Lucinda, is she real? 0:13:46.960 --> 0:13:48.400 She never broke. 0:13:48.240 --> 0:13:52.360 Character, changed character was anybody other than what you see 0:13:52.360 --> 0:13:55.520 on the screen. You know, she has that real ability 0:13:55.600 --> 0:14:00.440 to swim in intense emotions that are around her and 0:14:00.480 --> 0:14:01.640 feel really comfortable with it. 0:14:01.920 --> 0:14:04.000 It was great to watch. I mean her Wingwoman was 0:14:04.040 --> 0:14:06.200 a little bit creepy. I mean, what do you say 0:14:06.240 --> 0:14:09.199 when you hear someone's best friend come up and say 0:14:09.240 --> 0:14:11.440 they've got a dead crow and their freezer at home, 0:14:11.840 --> 0:14:12.920 like John. 0:14:13.320 --> 0:14:14.079 I know, I know. 0:14:14.160 --> 0:14:16.640 I mean, I remember when I first met with Cinder 0:14:16.679 --> 0:14:19.600 and she brought out the scroll with all those lists 0:14:19.640 --> 0:14:22.280 of things that she wanted from a guy, and then said, look, 0:14:22.320 --> 0:14:23.320 I'm a creatrix. 0:14:23.560 --> 0:14:25.600 And I just thought that she's wonderful. 0:14:25.600 --> 0:14:28.280 I've got no idea what she's talking about, but you know, 0:14:28.360 --> 0:14:32.160 I think probably the people around her are very similar, 0:14:32.360 --> 0:14:36.320 and so like you say, you know, her friends, her family, people, 0:14:36.400 --> 0:14:39.360 she hangs around with a very like minded in that way. 0:14:40.160 --> 0:14:41.640 I mean. The other thing I was going to ask 0:14:41.640 --> 0:14:43.000 you about before we go is, you know, when we 0:14:43.080 --> 0:14:46.520 left Tim and Sarah, we saw them navigating a few frustrations, 0:14:46.640 --> 0:14:48.920 you know, and then that has sort of continued on 0:14:49.000 --> 0:14:51.360 last night. Do you think in the history of telling 0:14:51.400 --> 0:14:55.600 someone to calm down, that anyone has actually ever calmed down? 0:14:55.880 --> 0:14:59.280 It is, once again a great example of what not 0:14:59.400 --> 0:15:02.880 to do and when you're in a relationship, and you know, 0:15:02.960 --> 0:15:06.680 I think back to so many key moments in Marred 0:15:06.720 --> 0:15:09.400 at First Sight over eleven seasons, where you know. 0:15:09.360 --> 0:15:13.120 People just seem to pick the worst possible time. 0:15:13.360 --> 0:15:16.040 To speak up. And to drop a clanger. You know 0:15:16.160 --> 0:15:19.360 in this situation. You know, you're on a honeymoon, it's 0:15:19.360 --> 0:15:21.560 a beautiful date, You're on the beach. 0:15:21.960 --> 0:15:23.120 How can we ruin the Liz? 0:15:24.120 --> 0:15:27.160 And then he says, come down, And that was after 0:15:27.240 --> 0:15:29.960 he said to her at the wedding, Oh, you know, 0:15:30.000 --> 0:15:32.840 I'm six months out of a relationship of six years 0:15:32.880 --> 0:15:34.200 where I thought I'd proposed to her. 0:15:34.480 --> 0:15:37.200 She's got a dorseer now of things that she's got 0:15:37.240 --> 0:15:40.480 to be worried about with this man. I mean, from 0:15:40.560 --> 0:15:43.160 your perspective, though, can they get past these sort of 0:15:43.160 --> 0:15:46.800 teething issues, because for me, being fascinated by people, I 0:15:46.840 --> 0:15:50.320 actually think when people meet and they are designing their relationship, 0:15:50.320 --> 0:15:52.760 they're drawing battle lines. Do you think that these two 0:15:52.960 --> 0:15:55.440 are quite suited and are just trying to draw their 0:15:55.480 --> 0:15:56.400 battle lines early? 0:15:56.680 --> 0:15:59.000 I think they are very well suited on a number 0:15:59.000 --> 0:16:01.960 of different levels. But I think their challenge is the 0:16:02.000 --> 0:16:05.240 same as pretty much everyone that we've seen on the show, 0:16:05.720 --> 0:16:11.520 and that is can they stop look at their relationship. 0:16:10.840 --> 0:16:14.240 Patterns and say, well, I need to change this up. 0:16:14.440 --> 0:16:15.960 I need to actually do it differently. 0:16:16.280 --> 0:16:19.200 Now, you and I both know that probably over the years, 0:16:19.480 --> 0:16:23.200 most of them will go no, I'm either perfect or 0:16:23.520 --> 0:16:28.440 I'm right, you're wrong, and so they just essentially sabotage 0:16:28.480 --> 0:16:31.280 the relationship that we put them in and they blow up. 0:16:31.480 --> 0:16:34.080 So for Sarah and Tim and everybody else this year, 0:16:34.360 --> 0:16:36.880 the same goes. They are going to have to stop 0:16:37.160 --> 0:16:40.560 and look at themselves and say, our fights start. What 0:16:40.640 --> 0:16:44.000 we're like when someone's understress, what happens We're at a 0:16:44.080 --> 0:16:47.840 dinner party and someone throws out accusations? How do we 0:16:47.920 --> 0:16:50.760 handle this? And then when the experts give us feedback, 0:16:50.800 --> 0:16:53.160 are we going to listen? And the ones that do 0:16:53.320 --> 0:16:56.840 well are either Camon Jules, or the Michael and Martha's 0:16:57.000 --> 0:17:00.600 or you know, the Johnny and Carys, they'll stop and go, yeah, actually, 0:17:00.640 --> 0:17:04.440 we're going to do this different, and that's they're. 0:17:04.240 --> 0:17:06.600 Going to evolve with a big experiment, and a. 0:17:06.560 --> 0:17:08.640 Lot of them can't do that, won't do that. 0:17:08.760 --> 0:17:10.520 Bryce and Melissa didn't do it, by the way, but 0:17:10.560 --> 0:17:14.159 they're still together. They didn't. I mean, that's still a 0:17:14.200 --> 0:17:14.879 success story. 0:17:14.960 --> 0:17:17.800 John, you know, and you know, I think with those 0:17:17.840 --> 0:17:21.399 two what they did do is they said, regardless of 0:17:21.440 --> 0:17:23.560 what gets thrown at us, thrown at us. Because the 0:17:23.600 --> 0:17:26.639 group really was very anti there and gave them a 0:17:26.680 --> 0:17:29.840 lot of well Bryce and gave him a lot of feedback. 0:17:30.960 --> 0:17:32.400 They stayed true to themselves. 0:17:32.440 --> 0:17:36.160 They never broke rank and to right to the end 0:17:36.280 --> 0:17:37.680 they said no, no, no, you've got. 0:17:37.520 --> 0:17:40.520 Us wrong, and we're going to make this And everyone's like, 0:17:40.960 --> 0:17:43.840 really are they? And they did and they they true 0:17:44.000 --> 0:17:44.679 formed and. 0:17:44.680 --> 0:17:47.040 They're going to die trying. They're going to die proving 0:17:47.119 --> 0:17:50.159 us all wrong. The only question that I thought you 0:17:50.280 --> 0:17:52.000 might be able to give a bit of perspective on 0:17:52.359 --> 0:17:54.719 that happened in that first episode was the speech that 0:17:54.800 --> 0:17:58.280 was quite a horrent from Tim's best man. Why did 0:17:58.400 --> 0:18:01.560 Tim not stop him halfway through that speech? That's a 0:18:01.640 --> 0:18:04.399 very long speech with a lot of touch points that 0:18:04.440 --> 0:18:07.960 were quite rated and probably painting him in a bad life. 0:18:08.359 --> 0:18:11.520 Why didn't he just say, you know, mate, shut up? 0:18:11.680 --> 0:18:14.119 Well and I go him one step further, because you know, 0:18:14.160 --> 0:18:16.920 I don't know they're family and friends, any of the couples. 0:18:17.240 --> 0:18:18.720 We don't know what they're going to be like. 0:18:19.000 --> 0:18:21.320 You know, my first thought when I watched it was 0:18:21.560 --> 0:18:23.560 to why are you hanging around with that guy? 0:18:24.080 --> 0:18:25.440 Does that mean about you? Tim? 0:18:25.760 --> 0:18:26.480 Exactly? 0:18:26.560 --> 0:18:28.840 If that's your choice for a best man who's going 0:18:28.880 --> 0:18:30.000 to make your best speech? 0:18:30.200 --> 0:18:33.359 Yeah, do you like kind of thinking? Who are you? Tim? 0:18:33.600 --> 0:18:36.119 Which I'm sure is what Sarah started to think like 0:18:36.280 --> 0:18:39.399 and her bridesmaids. But to your point, why didn't he 0:18:39.440 --> 0:18:42.479 step in? I think one of Tim's biggest challenges is 0:18:42.520 --> 0:18:46.040 that he struggles with asserting himself. He's a guy that 0:18:46.280 --> 0:18:49.760 likes to please and likes to keep the peace, and 0:18:49.800 --> 0:18:53.280 he will be challenged all the time throughout the experiment 0:18:53.359 --> 0:18:58.440 on this, and I think in that situation it required 0:18:58.720 --> 0:19:02.760 a person to just literally put in place a boundary 0:19:02.840 --> 0:19:06.040 and say enough, stop, sit down, your way out of line. 0:19:06.320 --> 0:19:09.879 But it goes to this whole theme throughout the experiment 0:19:09.920 --> 0:19:11.760 this year, which is boundary. 0:19:11.359 --> 0:19:13.680 Crossing what's appropriate and what's inappropriate. 0:19:14.359 --> 0:19:16.920 The group had their thoughts on it, the bridesmaids, the 0:19:17.000 --> 0:19:18.920 friends had their thoughts on it last night. So it's 0:19:18.960 --> 0:19:22.320 there right from the word go, and it consistently is 0:19:22.320 --> 0:19:23.359 a theme that comes up. 0:19:23.520 --> 0:19:26.639