WEBVTT - #179: Grinch Jizz 0:00:03.040 --> 0:00:06.720 Just stood by a couple of mitches. 0:00:07.360 --> 0:00:12.680 You delese yourself for the rude shocks of young adults. 0:00:13.200 --> 0:00:15.960 No one says the word turn as an adult. Kids 0:00:15.960 --> 0:00:18.360 would be like, can I return? You don't say that 0:00:18.400 --> 0:00:20.479 she as an adult? Can I have a turn in 0:00:20.520 --> 0:00:20.880 your car? 0:00:29.760 --> 0:00:32.600 And Mitchell coos illo? 0:00:32.760 --> 0:00:37.000 You are you illow you Mitchell's house again? You sound 0:00:37.040 --> 0:00:38.599 really excited about that. I am. 0:00:38.640 --> 0:00:41.760 It's because I just feel like your real friend when 0:00:41.760 --> 0:00:42.160 I'm here. 0:00:43.159 --> 0:00:44.840 Well, you're welcome in any time. 0:00:44.800 --> 0:00:46.360 No, I know, But when we do it in the studio, 0:00:46.720 --> 0:00:49.000 the podcast. In the studio, it feels like we're working that. 0:00:50.360 --> 0:00:52.640 You make a cuppa, I have a soda stream. I'm 0:00:52.680 --> 0:00:55.280 pissing your toilet, got any feed up? Feeder up on 0:00:55.320 --> 0:00:57.240 different cushions. Isabella just did a ship. 0:00:57.800 --> 0:00:58.080 I know. 0:00:58.400 --> 0:01:00.320 I'm sorry about that. Although I can't smell. Think it 0:01:00.400 --> 0:01:01.279 might have been a number one. 0:01:01.680 --> 0:01:03.520 Does she scratch like that for a number one? Yeah? 0:01:03.560 --> 0:01:05.520 She buries it in the KIDDI bitter. They're very polite 0:01:05.600 --> 0:01:05.800 like that. 0:01:06.080 --> 0:01:07.920 Oh, I could not live with a cat. 0:01:08.000 --> 0:01:09.040 I really want. 0:01:09.680 --> 0:01:11.760 I could not live two things I don't want in 0:01:11.800 --> 0:01:12.080 my life. 0:01:12.160 --> 0:01:14.520 Cat off, pussy. How do you go getting apart today 0:01:14.560 --> 0:01:16.440 by the way, ah, because it's a bit of a 0:01:16.520 --> 0:01:18.080 nightmare parking in my apartment building. 0:01:18.160 --> 0:01:20.040 Well, to be honest, I had a really sweet lady 0:01:20.040 --> 0:01:22.760 who I didn't have my ID on me, didn't realize 0:01:22.800 --> 0:01:25.800 I was going to be drinking alcohol here, and she said, 0:01:25.840 --> 0:01:26.959 you have to go back to your car and get 0:01:26.959 --> 0:01:29.400 your ID because how yours works. You got to park 0:01:29.400 --> 0:01:32.080 in the five minute visitor walk in, get a parking permit, 0:01:32.120 --> 0:01:34.720 then they open the boom gates like you're entering Universal Studio. 0:01:34.800 --> 0:01:37.160 It's a bit of a nightmare. And I had a 0:01:37.319 --> 0:01:41.959 Karen moment at them recently. A receptionists by I'm building because, 0:01:42.200 --> 0:01:44.720 as you said, if you're saying here for like twenty 0:01:44.760 --> 0:01:46.800 four hours or less, like overnight or just popping in 0:01:46.840 --> 0:01:49.240 for the afternoon, you have to sign in and get 0:01:49.280 --> 0:01:51.760 a pass. Ye. But if someone's saying more than twenty 0:01:51.760 --> 0:01:54.840 four hours, like Sean saying for the weekend, I have 0:01:54.880 --> 0:01:57.400 to send an email in advance asking for a short 0:01:57.480 --> 0:01:58.360 term path or whatever. 0:01:58.480 --> 0:02:00.920 Do you, with all due respect, what the fuck is 0:02:00.960 --> 0:02:05.200 this place? I know, like it's it's a you pay rent, Olivia, 0:02:05.240 --> 0:02:06.800 you're paying to live here. You shouldn't have I. 0:02:06.760 --> 0:02:08.880 Know price keeper Jennis here. Of course do you have 0:02:08.919 --> 0:02:10.760 this shit in? You have Service Meriton suite. 0:02:10.800 --> 0:02:13.280 I don't live in Service Meritans, she moved from. 0:02:14.400 --> 0:02:16.959 But you did retain Jeeves in this economy. That was 0:02:17.160 --> 0:02:20.279 very nice of you. He lives in as a butler. 0:02:19.960 --> 0:02:21.239 Now anyway, my parent moment. 0:02:21.320 --> 0:02:24.280 Yeah, yeah, It's always been the way that I have 0:02:24.360 --> 0:02:26.079 to send an email if I want Sean to stay 0:02:26.120 --> 0:02:28.240 for a few days, and I just copy and paste 0:02:28.240 --> 0:02:29.680 the same email from my fine notes. 0:02:29.720 --> 0:02:32.079 It's easy. And then one. 0:02:31.880 --> 0:02:35.720 Week they clapped back and said, oh, sorry, Mitchell, you 0:02:35.760 --> 0:02:38.919 haven't given us at least forty eight hours notice and 0:02:39.320 --> 0:02:41.680 will approve it this time, but next time, if you 0:02:41.680 --> 0:02:44.760 don't give us forty eight hours notice, Sean will have 0:02:44.800 --> 0:02:45.760 to park on the street. 0:02:47.240 --> 0:02:49.760 Sean will be forced to be destitute and homeless. 0:02:49.919 --> 0:02:53.960 So I just cracked it because they've been painful for 0:02:54.000 --> 0:02:54.640 a long time. 0:02:54.720 --> 0:02:56.519 Like Sean, we'll get phone. 0:02:56.200 --> 0:02:58.359 Calls from the security guards that work here over the 0:02:58.400 --> 0:03:01.200 weekend and they're just usive for no reason. 0:03:01.200 --> 0:03:02.520 They'll call him be like, mate, what are you still 0:03:02.560 --> 0:03:03.959 doing now? When do we get in that pass back? 0:03:04.080 --> 0:03:04.400 Really? 0:03:04.480 --> 0:03:06.160 I give him such a hard time, and so I 0:03:06.280 --> 0:03:07.960 just cracked it because they're trying to make it too 0:03:07.960 --> 0:03:09.000 hard for him to come visit me. 0:03:09.000 --> 0:03:10.560 Oh that would be so good to watch. Was it 0:03:10.600 --> 0:03:11.240 face to face? 0:03:11.320 --> 0:03:11.519 Yeah? 0:03:11.560 --> 0:03:13.079 I went down there in that little office that we 0:03:13.120 --> 0:03:15.520 all okay, and who did you see? What did you say? 0:03:16.400 --> 0:03:18.480 I waltzed down there and I said, we need to 0:03:18.520 --> 0:03:22.200 have a chat about the parking situation. It's not been 0:03:22.280 --> 0:03:24.320 a rule that I need to give forty eight hours 0:03:24.360 --> 0:03:27.000 notice for him to come and arrive the whole time 0:03:27.040 --> 0:03:29.000 I've been here, It's been a year, and why is 0:03:29.000 --> 0:03:31.120 this rule coming in now? And they were like, oh, 0:03:31.440 --> 0:03:35.120 I'm so sorry, I'm sorry, And they said, so do 0:03:35.200 --> 0:03:38.360 you ensure just not plan your weekend until last minute? 0:03:38.400 --> 0:03:41.600 And I was like, not every time, but it would 0:03:41.600 --> 0:03:42.880 be nice to have the fucking. 0:03:42.600 --> 0:03:45.000 Option and none of your fucking business how we plan it. 0:03:45.080 --> 0:03:46.200 Exactly, that's what I said. 0:03:46.240 --> 0:03:49.440 I said, I'm not just going to remove any spontaneity 0:03:49.440 --> 0:03:52.240 from my fucking relationship just for the sake of your admin. 0:03:52.440 --> 0:03:56.200 Also, late notice isn't anything before forty eight hours? 0:03:56.280 --> 0:03:57.720 Yeah, exactly, that's true. 0:03:57.760 --> 0:03:59.720 I should have the option to say to my boyfriend, 0:03:59.840 --> 0:04:00.760 or do you want to come over tonight? 0:04:00.920 --> 0:04:01.119 Yes? 0:04:01.280 --> 0:04:02.960 I should be able to do that or anyone. 0:04:03.040 --> 0:04:05.040 And so I had a crack at a I said, so, no, 0:04:05.120 --> 0:04:06.880 I won't be giving you forty eight hours notice, and 0:04:06.920 --> 0:04:09.240 she goes, oh, the thing is that sometimes the car 0:04:09.280 --> 0:04:11.840 pucks feel up really quick, so if you get into later, 0:04:11.880 --> 0:04:13.560 I might have one free for you. And I was like, 0:04:13.600 --> 0:04:16.120 if that happens, I'll wear it, darling. If that happens, 0:04:16.160 --> 0:04:18.920 that's fair. But here's how it's gonna work. 0:04:19.080 --> 0:04:20.320 Oh my god, Oh, I. 0:04:20.320 --> 0:04:23.279 Don't care if I email you at four point fifty 0:04:23.360 --> 0:04:25.960 nine on a Friday, you're about to shut the office. 0:04:26.400 --> 0:04:28.480 If I give you that late notice and there's a 0:04:28.520 --> 0:04:30.360 spot free, you're gonna give it to him. 0:04:30.440 --> 0:04:31.600 That's how it's gonna work. 0:04:32.360 --> 0:04:36.320 And also, under no fucking circumstance other security guards to 0:04:36.360 --> 0:04:41.440 call him ever again, ever and then and then she says, oh, well, 0:04:41.520 --> 0:04:43.360 can you at least give us an ETA of when 0:04:43.360 --> 0:04:44.920 he's going to arrive And I said, no, that's none 0:04:44.920 --> 0:04:47.960 of your business. You're going to allocate him a spot 0:04:48.279 --> 0:04:49.960 and he has the freedom to pick up the paths 0:04:50.000 --> 0:04:52.640 when everyone's wow, do we have a fucking understanding? 0:04:52.960 --> 0:04:54.480 And so it was good we thought of you. 0:04:54.520 --> 0:04:56.240 That is so card have you seen that lady on 0:04:56.279 --> 0:04:58.000 TikTok that does she pretends to be a character and 0:04:58.080 --> 0:04:59.680 she goes through. That's exactly who you sound like. 0:05:00.520 --> 0:05:02.760 Well, sometimes the Karen moment is necessary. 0:05:02.839 --> 0:05:06.240 No, I completely agree, justify that, like the security guards 0:05:06.240 --> 0:05:08.320 in this building must be so bored because nothing happens. 0:05:08.440 --> 0:05:10.080 They must be that bored. I've got a phone call 0:05:10.120 --> 0:05:12.760 the other day being like, Oh, you just parked a 0:05:12.760 --> 0:05:13.360 little bit. 0:05:13.240 --> 0:05:15.000 Close to the person next to you, so it might 0:05:15.040 --> 0:05:17.040 be hard for them to get in and out of 0:05:17.080 --> 0:05:19.360 their car. Could you just next time try and park 0:05:19.400 --> 0:05:21.920 a little bit further? And I was like, fuck, If 0:05:21.920 --> 0:05:22.320 that's the. 0:05:22.240 --> 0:05:24.520 Biggest issue of their tape, that's the only thing they 0:05:24.520 --> 0:05:25.839 have to do. They must be so bored. 0:05:25.920 --> 0:05:28.920 My worry is, though, Mitchell, that it's targeted to you. Now. 0:05:29.120 --> 0:05:31.560 Now they say bad things come in threes. You've already 0:05:31.600 --> 0:05:36.520 had the gay manly bashing attempted, You've already had the 0:05:36.600 --> 0:05:39.680 drink spiking incident, and the glass the glass is going missing. 0:05:40.160 --> 0:05:42.080 My fear and deep worry for you as a dear 0:05:42.080 --> 0:05:44.240 friend is that this is your third piece of hate. 0:05:44.279 --> 0:05:46.360 Chrome are they targeting you? 0:05:47.279 --> 0:05:49.960 I very nearly played that card. 0:05:50.080 --> 0:05:51.960 Should was going to Is it because we're gay? 0:05:52.240 --> 0:05:54.080 Is that it? I bet you let all the fucking 0:05:54.080 --> 0:05:55.560 straight couples stay and have a car park. 0:05:55.640 --> 0:06:00.440 No, do you call John and Nancy in room twelve 0:06:00.480 --> 0:06:02.120 B and give them the same shit. 0:06:02.320 --> 0:06:03.920 It crossed my mind, but I didn't go there. 0:06:03.960 --> 0:06:05.720 I don't think no, I don't think it is targeting 0:06:05.880 --> 0:06:07.479 because they give me a hard time too, even today. 0:06:07.520 --> 0:06:09.120 I had to walk back to my car, get my ID, 0:06:09.240 --> 0:06:10.400 come back and then. 0:06:10.600 --> 0:06:13.040 Where the fuck did they need it? Idea? 0:06:13.480 --> 0:06:15.440 But she didn't take anything from it. She looked at 0:06:15.480 --> 0:06:17.440 it and went, thank you, Mitchell, And she said what's 0:06:17.480 --> 0:06:19.440 your name? I said Mitchell? She said who are you visiting? 0:06:19.480 --> 0:06:21.400 I said Mitchell. She said no, what's your name? I said, 0:06:21.440 --> 0:06:24.840 we have the same name. Just relaxed, write them down 0:06:24.920 --> 0:06:25.520 and move on. 0:06:25.720 --> 0:06:27.880 Couple of Mitchell's baby said. 0:06:28.000 --> 0:06:30.200 You know the problem though, someone I walked out and 0:06:30.240 --> 0:06:33.760 some old woman was limping by, and she goes hull, I. 0:06:33.880 --> 0:06:36.200 Go true, and she goes hello young. 0:06:37.520 --> 0:06:40.280 She actually seemed nice, And the sense of community here 0:06:40.360 --> 0:06:43.479 does seem like it skewed more towards the appreciation of 0:06:43.520 --> 0:06:43.919 the older. 0:06:44.000 --> 0:06:45.880 Yeah, Like I said, I'm living the dream I've always 0:06:45.880 --> 0:06:47.440 wanted to live in a retirement village, and now I'm 0:06:47.440 --> 0:06:49.599 doing it basically, and now you're here. 0:06:49.480 --> 0:06:52.159 To remember when we called her retirement village to get quotes. 0:06:52.560 --> 0:06:55.039 Yeah, we wanted to find out the minimum age. And 0:06:55.080 --> 0:06:57.880 I have to be fucking fifty five. Yeah, I thought, Oh, 0:06:57.920 --> 0:07:01.000 I can't wait. My grandparents for some like they're losing 0:07:01.000 --> 0:07:03.719 the plot and they are so offended every time anyone 0:07:04.120 --> 0:07:07.080 suggests the idea of living in a retirement home or 0:07:07.160 --> 0:07:08.839 nursing home or something where they can be cared for. 0:07:09.040 --> 0:07:11.320 They're living on the farm, and I keep saying to Mom, 0:07:11.560 --> 0:07:13.320 I would just do it in a half because it 0:07:13.400 --> 0:07:14.280 sounds like a dream. 0:07:14.360 --> 0:07:16.240 Maybe not a nursing home. That's a bit different to 0:07:16.240 --> 0:07:17.040 a retirement village. 0:07:17.040 --> 0:07:18.360 Now, you don't want to live in a nursing home. 0:07:18.400 --> 0:07:22.360 My nan, who's a ninety three, is in a nursing home. 0:07:22.400 --> 0:07:24.320 And it's so funny. So my nan sold her house. 0:07:24.360 --> 0:07:26.960 This happened today. Funny you bring it up. Sold her 0:07:26.960 --> 0:07:28.960 big house because she she has dementia and we had 0:07:28.960 --> 0:07:31.760 to get her into a care facility and the dementia's 0:07:31.760 --> 0:07:34.240 gotten worse because she sold her house. So they put 0:07:34.240 --> 0:07:37.200 that money and bought her like the biggest apartment in 0:07:37.240 --> 0:07:41.040 the retirement home. However, everyone in the retirement home wants it. 0:07:41.080 --> 0:07:42.560 There's a wait list for men's room. 0:07:42.640 --> 0:07:44.960 Oh my god, so it now, she's. 0:07:44.840 --> 0:07:46.880 In it now. It's got a balcony, it's got two bedrooms, 0:07:46.920 --> 0:07:49.280 it's got a guest room. It is the biggest and 0:07:49.320 --> 0:07:51.880 the best in that whole retirement village. 0:07:51.920 --> 0:07:52.640 So she owns that. 0:07:52.720 --> 0:07:55.280 You bought it. You aren't you buy it. My thing 0:07:55.400 --> 0:07:58.040 is they're all waiting for her to die because everyone 0:07:58.080 --> 0:07:58.480 wants it. 0:07:58.600 --> 0:08:01.320 But if you, I hope someone in your family inherits 0:08:01.320 --> 0:08:02.880 it because I fucking want that place. 0:08:03.360 --> 0:08:05.480 Can someone over fifty five live there? Just hold it 0:08:05.560 --> 0:08:06.280 until I'm fifty? 0:08:06.560 --> 0:08:10.240 It's so Actually, the aged care system in this country 0:08:10.280 --> 0:08:14.280 needs to be needs reworking, because when Nen passes away 0:08:15.040 --> 0:08:17.720 that they have they own the property and then the 0:08:17.800 --> 0:08:21.000 money goes to them. They take it and when yep, 0:08:21.040 --> 0:08:22.760 and when n dies, that money gets sent back to 0:08:22.840 --> 0:08:25.440 mum and dad and the family, and they don't make 0:08:25.440 --> 0:08:26.960 any money on it, but they just get the exact 0:08:27.000 --> 0:08:29.000 same amount back and the room gets given to someone else. 0:08:29.040 --> 0:08:31.080 It's like a holding fee. It's a whole It's fucked. 0:08:31.200 --> 0:08:32.160 It's unethical. 0:08:32.480 --> 0:08:34.280 Yeah, I don't understand that makes sense. 0:08:34.360 --> 0:08:36.160 Mum and Dad go there and they go Hi, Michelle 0:08:36.200 --> 0:08:37.920 and Mark, just letting you know that there's been three 0:08:37.920 --> 0:08:40.880 more names added to clinic room. Yeah, they're fully aware 0:08:42.040 --> 0:08:45.600 because the nature of a retirement village is that you 0:08:45.640 --> 0:08:47.640 know you're not going to move on after it. That's 0:08:47.679 --> 0:08:49.040 sort of that's sort of. 0:08:49.040 --> 0:08:51.200 The end of your retiring at the end of the game. 0:08:51.480 --> 0:08:53.880 So they know that she will pass away there and 0:08:54.240 --> 0:08:56.800 people are waiting it so grim. So Nana's like, oh, 0:08:56.840 --> 0:08:59.400 I've made lots of friends this week, might and then 0:08:59.559 --> 0:09:01.880 they want for your fucking room. And they all give 0:09:01.920 --> 0:09:04.080 her chocolates and roses because then could give the room, 0:09:04.160 --> 0:09:06.200 or it's because she has it, she can choose who 0:09:06.240 --> 0:09:09.360 comes next. So really, yeah, she's like the queen of 0:09:09.679 --> 0:09:11.439 the fucking prison. What is it called top dog? 0:09:11.520 --> 0:09:13.200 She's top dog. I love that. 0:09:13.640 --> 0:09:15.600 The poor thing's riddled with dementia and is forgetful. She 0:09:15.600 --> 0:09:17.640 forgets who she's learned it to. So Mum and Dad 0:09:17.720 --> 0:09:18.280 to all these. 0:09:18.120 --> 0:09:19.560 People have been promised, Yeah they have. 0:09:19.760 --> 0:09:21.640 They're like, oh, just so you know, Claire promised us 0:09:21.679 --> 0:09:22.000 the room. 0:09:22.080 --> 0:09:24.960 We're like, no, oh, that's them lying yeah, that's exactly right. 0:09:25.000 --> 0:09:28.280 You know, it's fucking random. My parents farm, there's a 0:09:28.360 --> 0:09:30.680 second we call it the old house. It was like 0:09:30.720 --> 0:09:33.440 the original house that people lived on fucking ages. 0:09:33.480 --> 0:09:34.480 It must be nice. 0:09:34.720 --> 0:09:37.439 It's abandoned and it's the second house. No, no, no, 0:09:37.480 --> 0:09:40.640 it's not functional. It's got fucking dead sheep in there. 0:09:40.720 --> 0:09:44.320 Like it's it's old and abandoned, but it's got really 0:09:44.320 --> 0:09:47.400 really nice timber. Yeah, and occasionally Dad gets phone calls 0:09:47.400 --> 0:09:50.679 from absolute random's being like, good a CM, see your 0:09:50.760 --> 0:09:53.120 uncle Clem before we pass God rest his soul. He 0:09:53.200 --> 0:09:55.160 promised me I could, you know, rip down the house 0:09:55.160 --> 0:09:57.240 and use that timber And he's like, see you later. 0:09:57.320 --> 0:09:57.640 Cock it. 0:09:57.800 --> 0:09:59.400 I don't know why people want this timber in the 0:09:59.400 --> 0:09:59.840 old house. 0:10:00.080 --> 0:10:02.080 And you know what, I love everyone always speaks as 0:10:02.080 --> 0:10:04.400 if they were best friends with the dead because the 0:10:04.440 --> 0:10:06.920 dad's not there to say no, I actually hated that pitch. 0:10:08.679 --> 0:10:11.760 Yeah that's for you know what. I've just had an idea. Yes, 0:10:11.800 --> 0:10:13.280 I'm going to create a list of people that I 0:10:13.360 --> 0:10:17.240 fucking have never promised anything to. Everyone wants. 0:10:17.240 --> 0:10:18.440 I've got a lot of tech, I've got a lot 0:10:18.480 --> 0:10:18.880 of gadgets. 0:10:18.880 --> 0:10:20.400 I'm going to be like, No, I did not promise 0:10:20.440 --> 0:10:23.480 Jenna my MacBook Pro because you know Mitch will be like, well, Mitch, 0:10:23.480 --> 0:10:24.760 promise me always audio equipment. 0:10:24.880 --> 0:10:28.160 No, I didn't put it in your will. They certainly cannot. 0:10:28.600 --> 0:10:28.920 People. 0:10:28.960 --> 0:10:32.000 I did not promise anything to you can. Actually, Mitchell, 0:10:32.040 --> 0:10:33.400 on the record, have all my audio equipment? 0:10:33.480 --> 0:10:35.360 Thank you? MacBook you know what. 0:10:35.600 --> 0:10:38.840 Yes, it's new, it's m one soaked, it's all yours. 0:10:39.160 --> 0:10:40.520 Damn it. I would have liked the MacBook. 0:10:40.520 --> 0:10:43.840 Actually, you guys can, No, I have the mac Would 0:10:43.840 --> 0:10:44.760 you speak at my wedding? 0:10:44.840 --> 0:10:45.280 My wedding? 0:10:45.960 --> 0:10:48.440 Yeah, Now I'm further. I think I'm closer to my 0:10:48.480 --> 0:10:52.840 funeral that I would you. Would you speak at my funeral? Mitchell? 0:10:53.520 --> 0:10:53.600 Oh? 0:10:53.640 --> 0:10:54.800 If I was asked too, sure. 0:10:55.559 --> 0:10:58.200 I've given numerous eulogy so I'm pretty good at them. 0:10:58.800 --> 0:10:59.120 Yes. 0:10:59.160 --> 0:11:02.319 Oh, but you mean like because you did and Boilin's 0:11:02.960 --> 0:11:06.480 and oh god sorry. 0:11:06.800 --> 0:11:12.360 And then who else? Madam too sword, Yes, madam. Anyway, 0:11:12.400 --> 0:11:16.320 if it's the first time, listen, we're in Mitchell's house, 0:11:16.320 --> 0:11:19.079 that's the story. It was the first time was sitting. 0:11:19.080 --> 0:11:20.840 We start every show with and is it just me 0:11:21.240 --> 0:11:23.600 something we've noticed we hate to appreciate Mitch doesn't know mine. 0:11:23.640 --> 0:11:24.480 I don't know Mitch's. 0:11:24.720 --> 0:11:26.640 I'm going to be preparing something a little special for 0:11:26.720 --> 0:11:29.280 my itchim itchim. 0:11:29.440 --> 0:11:30.160 I thought he's an itch. 0:11:30.760 --> 0:11:33.040 Well I'm a bitcham. Actually I'm covered in buzzy bites. 0:11:33.040 --> 0:11:36.000 Och Fuck me. 0:11:36.400 --> 0:11:38.480 It's always just a little bit more chaotic when we're 0:11:38.480 --> 0:11:39.040 at home, isn't it. 0:11:39.080 --> 0:11:40.160 I'm a wedding celebrant. 0:11:40.440 --> 0:11:41.360 Oh go hitch. 0:11:41.160 --> 0:11:47.040 Them's the witness to fucking hit and run snitch them? 0:11:47.120 --> 0:11:49.960 Yeah, of course, No, you're so right about that one. 0:11:50.920 --> 0:11:53.320 My ex, my partner. I'm really not vibing them. 0:11:53.320 --> 0:11:58.000 I'll ditch them anyway. I'm doing something a little special. 0:11:58.000 --> 0:11:59.800 Do you want to kick things off? Yeah, let's go, 0:12:00.080 --> 0:12:00.679 let's jump in. 0:12:02.480 --> 0:12:03.640 Is it just me? 0:12:05.800 --> 0:12:08.240 Did you also have a moment that made you think, 0:12:08.400 --> 0:12:09.520 you know what? It is? 0:12:09.640 --> 0:12:14.640 Time to shake things up in my life? I guess so? Yes? 0:12:14.760 --> 0:12:15.720 Why what with your moment? 0:12:16.040 --> 0:12:18.839 I'm I'm more specifically talking about weight loss, and I 0:12:19.320 --> 0:12:21.600 remember you know I've lost forty kilos. We've spoken about 0:12:21.640 --> 0:12:25.920 it on Yeah shut up. But I got a call 0:12:26.000 --> 0:12:28.679 this week and it reminded me the inciting incident that 0:12:28.679 --> 0:12:29.880 made me go I'm going to lose weight. I got 0:12:29.880 --> 0:12:32.439 a call from an MRI clinic and they called me 0:12:32.480 --> 0:12:34.920 because I have a brain condition Kiari malformation. I've got 0:12:34.960 --> 0:12:37.720 to get twelve monthly MRIs. And they call me and 0:12:37.720 --> 0:12:40.120 they go, Hi, Mitch, just checking that you know your 0:12:40.200 --> 0:12:43.480 due for your twelve monthly MRI. And we've booked you 0:12:43.520 --> 0:12:46.559 in for the Safari Room and the Safari Room for 0:12:46.600 --> 0:12:49.600 the MRI. And I remember thinking, oh my god, that's right. 0:12:50.840 --> 0:12:53.439 I go, thank you so much for calling. I don't 0:12:53.480 --> 0:12:55.800 need to come to your clinic anymore. Thank you, And 0:12:55.880 --> 0:12:56.800 they said, oh, okay, no worries. 0:12:56.880 --> 0:12:57.320 They hung up. 0:12:57.720 --> 0:13:00.960 Why not I never told anyone this and because I 0:13:01.000 --> 0:13:03.920 was embarrassed, like genuinely embarrassed. But this is the first 0:13:03.960 --> 0:13:05.880 time I'm saying this. This was the moment that I 0:13:05.920 --> 0:13:09.080 thought to myself, I need to make some changes. I'm 0:13:09.080 --> 0:13:10.760 a bigger boy and it's affecting my life. 0:13:11.080 --> 0:13:12.640 But wait, I'm not following. What's they got to do 0:13:12.679 --> 0:13:14.200 with the MRI. Why don't you need those anymore? 0:13:14.400 --> 0:13:15.360 I know I need to get MRS. 0:13:15.520 --> 0:13:17.680 Yeah, I still need my MRIs. But I canceled the 0:13:17.720 --> 0:13:22.240 Safari Room clinic because about twelve months ago, I was 0:13:22.280 --> 0:13:24.000 the biggest I ever was I was almost one hundred 0:13:24.000 --> 0:13:27.160 and sixty killers and I'm six foot three, big toll boy. Yeah, 0:13:27.240 --> 0:13:29.400 and my GP goes, we need to get you a 0:13:29.400 --> 0:13:31.840 monthly MRI. Twelve monthly MRI go and book it in. 0:13:31.960 --> 0:13:32.200 Yeah. 0:13:32.240 --> 0:13:34.240 So I call my local place and they go, hi, Mitch, 0:13:35.000 --> 0:13:36.040 can we just get all your details? 0:13:36.040 --> 0:13:37.120 And they go, what's your weight? 0:13:37.160 --> 0:13:40.680 I tell them my weight and they go Unfortunately, Mitch, 0:13:41.840 --> 0:13:45.600 the MRI machine caps out at one point thirty five. 0:13:45.840 --> 0:13:47.480 Oh my god, you're over the weight limit. 0:13:47.559 --> 0:13:49.079 But we'll connect you to this place that does it. 0:13:49.160 --> 0:13:51.000 I said, oh, no worry, that's fine, bit embarrassing, but 0:13:51.000 --> 0:13:52.360 I'll go to a bigger MRI machine. 0:13:52.400 --> 0:13:56.280 That seems like a bit of a flaw in the system. Yeah. 0:13:56.320 --> 0:14:00.120 The place they gave me to get an MRI is 0:14:00.120 --> 0:14:00.920 an animal hospital. 0:14:02.120 --> 0:14:04.440 Oh no, are you serious? 0:14:04.520 --> 0:14:06.200 Did they bring it up in one of those giant 0:14:06.200 --> 0:14:08.760 elevators they used for elephants in the circusts. 0:14:08.360 --> 0:14:13.240 And fucking Volkswagen cars to get them into the showroom. 0:14:13.400 --> 0:14:14.640 It was an animal hospital? 0:14:14.920 --> 0:14:15.160 Was it? 0:14:15.200 --> 0:14:15.640 Actually? 0:14:15.640 --> 0:14:18.240 I swear to God and so was that the moment 0:14:18.280 --> 0:14:20.520 they were like, Jesus, I've got to do something about. 0:14:20.280 --> 0:14:22.560 That was the moment that I thought, Christ on a bike. 0:14:22.640 --> 0:14:25.400 If I'm going to the same GP as a local 0:14:25.480 --> 0:14:28.320 fucking elephant, there is something wrong. And I went and 0:14:28.320 --> 0:14:31.840 had my m right in this in the Safari room, 0:14:32.160 --> 0:14:37.640 which is where they m a right Elephants Graphs R 0:14:39.320 --> 0:14:42.880 and Mitch fucking Chewy. I had to be rightly. An 0:14:42.960 --> 0:14:45.400 MRI machine is like a donut. This thing was like 0:14:45.440 --> 0:14:48.960 the rings of Saturn. It was gy fucking gantic, and 0:14:48.960 --> 0:14:51.080 they were so nice and they knew that like big 0:14:51.120 --> 0:14:54.800 people come and and I quite literally I got the 0:14:54.880 --> 0:14:56.560 m R. And I'm like, I'm never going to tell anyone, 0:14:56.600 --> 0:14:58.720 and I and that that's why I decided to lose weight. 0:14:58.880 --> 0:15:01.640 But I said, that's you said, I no longer need you. 0:15:01.760 --> 0:15:03.840 I'm with you now. I follow it correct. But it 0:15:03.880 --> 0:15:06.040 was awful, Like I was in the waiting a normal one. 0:15:06.240 --> 0:15:07.480 I can go to a normal one, Yes, I can, 0:15:07.800 --> 0:15:09.880 exactly me and I'm not. I am nowhere. I'm not 0:15:09.960 --> 0:15:12.120 laughing at anyone that needs the bigger one me. 0:15:12.520 --> 0:15:13.720 I think that should be avail. 0:15:14.080 --> 0:15:16.920 No, no, well, I completely agree. One hundred and thirty 0:15:16.920 --> 0:15:19.960 five isn't even to someone who's my height exactly like 0:15:20.040 --> 0:15:22.560 even now I'm one hundred and like ten and I's 0:15:22.600 --> 0:15:25.640 still a bigger way anyway, it is. It's one of 0:15:25.680 --> 0:15:29.440 the most embarrassing feelings. I mean, if you carry shame 0:15:29.480 --> 0:15:32.040 around your size, which I did. Maybe i'm speaking I'm 0:15:32.040 --> 0:15:34.600 speaking from my experience. But when we went to Hawaii 0:15:34.640 --> 0:15:37.160 earlier in the year for my mum sixtieth we booked 0:15:37.160 --> 0:15:41.280 in around the Jurassic World tour, the Drascic World tour 0:15:41.280 --> 0:15:43.880 of like the mountains, and we booked a little go 0:15:44.120 --> 0:15:47.640 carts mopeds and we get there and like, hello, everybody, 0:15:47.680 --> 0:15:50.960 welcome to the Waikiki Jurassic World test. We need to 0:15:51.160 --> 0:15:53.520 were you are before you get on, and we had 0:15:53.560 --> 0:15:55.760 to weigh ourselves on scales and I jumped on and 0:15:55.800 --> 0:15:57.960 he goes, sorry, buddy, you can't, you can't ride. But 0:15:58.000 --> 0:16:00.240 then that was the awkward conversation with my family, like, well, 0:16:00.240 --> 0:16:02.280 if Mitch can't do it, we're not going to do it. 0:16:02.280 --> 0:16:04.680