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Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families Podcast. It's the podcast for the

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Speaker 1: time poor parent who just wants answers. Now.

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Speaker 2: The scientific method can only answer so many questions. There

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Speaker 2: are a whole lot of things that it cannot answer.

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Speaker 2: And I'm thrilled that the kids are having these positive experiences,

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Speaker 2: as much as I don't understand it and think it's

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Speaker 2: a lot of below.

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Speaker 1: And now here's the stars of our show, my mum

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Speaker 1: and dad.

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Speaker 2: Hello, and welcome to the Happy Families Podcast. It's the

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Speaker 2: end of another week. It's justin I'm here with Kylie

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Speaker 2: and every Friday we talk I'll do Better Tomorrow. This

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Speaker 2: is the bit where we talk about our successes and failures,

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Speaker 2: the things that have been working right and the things

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Speaker 2: that have worked so well in our family. It's kind

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Speaker 2: of like news when you're at kindergarten or preschool. You

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Speaker 2: know you've got to stand up and hold up the

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Speaker 2: awesome thing that you'd done and show everybody how brilliant

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Speaker 2: you were. It's kind of like that, except sometimes we

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Speaker 2: don't share the good stuff. We share the ugly stuff. Kylie,

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Speaker 2: why don't you go first? What did you want to

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Speaker 2: talk about for I'll do Better Tomorrow? Today?

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Speaker 3: A hapful of years ago, I was introduced to one

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Speaker 3: of the most beautiful human beings I think I've ever met.

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Speaker 2: We met more than a handful of years ago. It

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Speaker 2: was a couple of decades ago.

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Speaker 3: I'm not talking about so cheeky. Her name is Pepper,

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Speaker 3: and she's actually a practicing kinesiologist.

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Speaker 2: Okay, So we're going here today.

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Speaker 3: This is a slightly controversial topic in our home.

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Speaker 2: Yes, that's one way to say it. Should I explain

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Speaker 2: why this is a provocative topic in our home, go

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Speaker 2: for it, okay, Because kinesiology is based on an energy

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Speaker 2: model of health, not a medical model of health. Okay.

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Speaker 2: And there is very very little evidence at all of

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Speaker 2: any kind of There's no scientific evidence that shows that

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Speaker 2: kinesiology works for me. It's hocus pocus, it's hogwashds well,

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Speaker 2: it's a lot of garbage. It's a load of bloney.

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Speaker 3: So what interests me in your whole mindset is that

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Speaker 3: you are an.

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Speaker 2: I'm an evidence based scientific practition now. I have a PhD.

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Speaker 2: I learned how to be a scientist. I look for

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Speaker 2: the what.

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Speaker 3: God fearing man?

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Speaker 2: Oh, come on, okay, so I have faith as well.

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Speaker 3: So over the last few years, I have had my

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Speaker 3: own experiences personally, but I've also chosen to take our

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Speaker 3: children at different times and I can't explain like I

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Speaker 3: literally I can't explain it. But every single time we go,

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Speaker 3: I come home with more clarity than I have previously had.

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Speaker 3: I'm watching it now with two of our teenagers who've

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Speaker 3: been really struggling with some big emotions lately. One of

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Speaker 3: them has actually been seeing a psychologist to help her

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Speaker 3: through the process. And You've been saying to me for

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Speaker 3: some time.

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Speaker 2: I knew you were going to say that, and I've

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Speaker 2: been saying, what have I been saying?

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Speaker 3: You've been saying to me for a long time now

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Speaker 3: that you feel like we are literally throwing money down

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Speaker 3: the drain.

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Speaker 2: We're not making the progress that we need to make.

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Speaker 2: And that's not to say anything about the psychology process.

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Speaker 2: It's just this isn't going very far, very fast.

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Speaker 3: So with one of our children, I remember taking her

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Speaker 3: to a psychologist a few years back and we literally

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Speaker 3: sat in her room and for an hour and a

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Speaker 3: half we talked about handball handball, and I was I'm

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Speaker 3: going to use the word livid.

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Speaker 2: I was pretty livid in the rage.

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Speaker 3: By the time we walked out. I thought, I've just

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Speaker 3: paid two hundred and fifty dollars so that we can

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Speaker 3: talk about handball, and I don't feel like we achieved anything,

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Speaker 3: no progress in that whole conversation. Contrast that with just recently,

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Speaker 3: and I'm sharing this with my daughter's permission, we went

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Speaker 3: to Peppa the kinesiologist, and we started talking about skin

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Speaker 3: care and makeup regimes, right, and I started going down

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Speaker 3: the same road of thoughts, why am.

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Speaker 2: I spending all this money?

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Speaker 3: What is going on?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Why are we talking about this? And then the aha

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Speaker 3: moment was just so transformational for both me and the

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Speaker 3: relationship I have with this daughter and for her to

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Speaker 3: understand herself. And the wonderful thing about kinesiology or my

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Speaker 3: experience with kinesiology, is that we talk about having emotional intelligence.

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Speaker 3: The ability to connect our emotions to the experiences that

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Speaker 3: we're having when we can't actually articulate the emotions that

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Speaker 3: we're having is really hard, like it's so hard to

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Speaker 3: do that. But through kinesiology and the use of energy,

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Speaker 3: as you would put it, if it's an energy model, yep,

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Speaker 3: Pepper was able to help one of our children, well

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Speaker 3: all of our children at different times, navigate the emotions

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Speaker 3: that they're feeling in those moments, and then help to

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Speaker 3: create the bigger picture of why things are happening, why

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Speaker 3: they do the things they do impacts other people, and

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Speaker 3: the perspective that they each bring to the table. And

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Speaker 3: I'm telling you, you can't deny it. It's been transformational.

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Speaker 2: I cannot deny it.

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Speaker 3: We have a girl who's come home.

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Speaker 2: We have two daughters who saw Pepper in the last

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Speaker 2: few weeks, and both of them have been completely different people.

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Speaker 3: They navigated one of the most challenging experiences that they've

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Speaker 3: had recently, which would have it.

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Speaker 2: Could have escalated been explosive, volcanic.

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Speaker 3: Massive yep, and with a little bit of coaching from me,

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Speaker 3: just acknowledged to each of them that they didn't need

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Speaker 3: to be each other's enemies, that they could actually be allies.

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Speaker 2: And they were aligned and they pulled it together. Now

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Speaker 2: here's what I'm going to say about kinesiology. I think

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Speaker 2: that a skilled person like Pepper is using kinesiology as

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Speaker 2: a vehicle or as a way to gain insights for

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Speaker 2: effective counseling. So what I think is, I still don't

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Speaker 2: think that the kinesiology works. I don't buy it at all,

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Speaker 2: but people do buy it more than that though, because

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Speaker 2: she's doing the muscle tests and the different fancy kinesiology

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Speaker 2: mumbo jumbo. It allows people to feel safe, they open up.

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Speaker 2: And because she is a skilled communicator and a wonderful counselor,

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Speaker 2: even though that's not the shingle on her door. It's kinesiologist,

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Speaker 2: but she's really just a very skilled counselor. I would

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Speaker 2: say she's outstanding from that point of view, and that's

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Speaker 2: why we're getting the breakthroughs. But it's through the vehicle,

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Speaker 2: the very useful, although not quite right, vehicle of kinesiology,

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Speaker 2: that we're getting where we're going. And this goes back.

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Speaker 3: I'm going to beg to differ.

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Speaker 2: Of course.

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Speaker 3: I have sat in those appointments and there is no way,

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Speaker 3: no matter how many conversations we have, there is no

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Speaker 3: way that she could come to the conclusions that she

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Speaker 3: comes to without the help of energy. Yeah, I'm just

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Speaker 3: putting it out there.

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Speaker 2: Regardless whether it's right or not, it is useful. It

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Speaker 2: is so useful.

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Speaker 3: It has been so powerful for our girls to number one,

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Speaker 3: understand who they are, understand their purpose, and understand the

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Speaker 3: way they think.

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Speaker 2: Do you reason we should get Pepper on the podcast

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Speaker 2: and I can ask her a few tough, tough questions.

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Speaker 3: I don't know if she wanted to talk to maybe

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Speaker 3: she won pretty hardcore.

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Speaker 2: I'm not cynical. I'm skeptical. I look for evidence because

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Speaker 2: that's the way I've been trained, right, That's how I've

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Speaker 2: been trained.

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Speaker 3: One of the last catch ups that we had with Pepper,

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Speaker 3: I was talking to our daughter and she said, what

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Speaker 3: do you think Dad's going to say about this session?

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Speaker 3: And I said, I'm not sure, and she said, he

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Speaker 3: just thinks this is hocus pocus, doesn't he?

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Speaker 2: But it's useful hocus pocus. And I'm supportive of it.

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Speaker 2: I'm so glad you take the kids there and we

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Speaker 2: see breakthroughs and we see transformations and we see progress, development,

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Speaker 2: learning growth. So I'm all for it, even if I

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Speaker 2: don't believe in it. Does that make sense? Can we

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Speaker 2: can we be okay? That?

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Speaker 1: Like?

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Speaker 3: I'm supportive, right, I am so grateful that, in spite

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Speaker 3: of your lack of belief in it, that you have

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Speaker 3: been You've been extremely supportive And for me as a mum,

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Speaker 3: I think one of the things that I struggle with

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Speaker 3: with psychology is that I take my child along because

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Speaker 3: she's having troubles and I'm left outside and I don't

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Speaker 3: know what's going on on the other side. And while

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Speaker 3: I respect that our children also need to have autonomy

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Speaker 3: and some space to express themselves. What I have loved

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Speaker 3: about this process, and I don't know if it's just

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Speaker 3: a Pepper thing or whether it is across the board

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Speaker 3: kinesiology thing. I'm included in that process, and my children

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Speaker 3: it's almost like they're so grateful that there's a mediation

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Speaker 3: point that they can actually open up and share this

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Speaker 3: stuff in a safe place and know that I can

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Speaker 3: hear them without the emotion of what's going on. And

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Speaker 3: it has been so powerful. It has It has really, honestly,

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Speaker 3: in the last two weeks since we've returned back to Pepper,

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Speaker 3: the kind of relationship that I'm experiencing with these two

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Speaker 3: kids that have been really struggling with emotions, it's just

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Speaker 3: been a transformation.

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Speaker 2: So that's you, that's your I'll do that it tomorrow.

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Speaker 2: It's a big win to try holistic and alternative therapies

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Speaker 2: if you don't feel like you're making progress with the

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Speaker 2: more evidence based approaches.

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Speaker 3: I think we need to be open minded to recognize

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Speaker 3: that while humans in general, we want proof, we want

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Speaker 3: to see that there is absolutely you know, this is

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Speaker 3: grounded in scientific methods. The reality is sometimes we just

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Speaker 3: can't find answers in those traditional places. And when we

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Speaker 3: find ourselves in that, where do we go? Then I'd

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Speaker 3: like to think that there are other places that we

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Speaker 3: can go to provide us with hope that things can

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Speaker 3: get better.

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Speaker 2: I think it's a really important conversation. It's a fascinating conversation,

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Speaker 2: and we don't know so much. The scientific method can

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Speaker 2: only answer so many questions. There are a whole lot

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Speaker 2: of things that it cannot answer. And I'm thrilled that

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Speaker 2: the kids are having these positive experiences, as much as

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Speaker 2: I don't understand it and think it's a lot of belone.

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Speaker 3: I hope Peppa doesn't hear this.

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Speaker 2: But I love Pepper and I would sit down and

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Speaker 2: have a session with her if I was really stuck

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Speaker 2: as well. Yeah, yeah, seriously, Okay, we need to talk

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Speaker 2: about my old do better tomorrow. Our time is almost up.

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Speaker 3: Well, what's yours?

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Speaker 2: So two things just before I share my older better tomorrow.

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Speaker 2: First off, the other night I was in Adelaide, and

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Speaker 2: I met a lady by the name of Kristin Crowhurst.

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Speaker 2: She gave me a book. People give me books often,

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Speaker 2: and I'm always grateful that people want to share what

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Speaker 2: they've done with me, and I'm usually really impressed with

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Speaker 2: what I've been handed. Kristin was no exception. She's got

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Speaker 2: a brand new children's book. Couldn't believe it. She's taken

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Speaker 2: my three favorite words, except she came up with them independently.

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Speaker 2: I didn't invent it. She came up with it without

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Speaker 2: even coming across me. No matter what, No matter what,

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Speaker 2: It's a beautiful little children's book. It's available right now

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Speaker 2: on Amazon. I read it. I've got a copy of it.

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Speaker 2: I've shared it with the kids. It's really lovely. It's

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Speaker 2: definitely for younger kids, but just gorgeous no matter what.

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Speaker 2: Available on Amazon right now, by Kristin Crowhurst. I told

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Speaker 2: them I was going to share it with people because

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Speaker 2: I thought it was gorgeous. Second quick bit of news

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Speaker 2: that I should have mentioned at the start of the podcast,

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Speaker 2: but I'm going to mention it right now. I've got

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Speaker 2: a new book out. I got a new book out.

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Speaker 2: It's called Being a Great Dad. For dummies, Being a

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Speaker 2: Great Dad for Dummies?

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Speaker 3: Are you a dummy?

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Speaker 2: Sometimes I am. I am the kind of dad who

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Speaker 2: probably needs a book like this. In fact, I think

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Speaker 2: every dad needs a book like this. It's a big book,

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Speaker 2: Being a Great Dad for Dummies.

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Speaker 3: You look at it, it looks a little bit like a textbooks.

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Speaker 2: Well it's not. But it's useful and it's kind of

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Speaker 2: a DIY guide and you go to the bit that

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Speaker 2: you need. It's not a book that you read from

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Speaker 2: cover to cover. Okay, sense, that's how dummies boks are written.

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Speaker 2: You just go to the index, find the bit you need,

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Speaker 2: read that paragraph, and get on with it. It's really about

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Speaker 2: making progress quickly. Being a Great Dad for Dummies is

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Speaker 2: out now where if you buy your books online, in

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Speaker 2: bookstores and all over the place. And I really wanted

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Speaker 2: to share that because I'm excited. That's my ninth book.

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Speaker 2: The last thing a bit there, aren't you maybe a

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Speaker 2: little bit? The last thing that I need to do

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Speaker 2: is share my I old do better tomorrow. It's a

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Speaker 2: really simple one. We went and bought a copy of

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Speaker 2: the Australian version of Monopoly a little while ago, maybe

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Speaker 2: a week and a half ago, and on the weekend,

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Speaker 2: I sat down with the kids and played Monopoly for

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Speaker 2: about two and a half hours. And I haven't played

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Speaker 2: Monopoly since I was a teenager. I hate the game.

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Speaker 2: I hate board games. But I just thought, no, I'm

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Speaker 2: going to do it. I'm going to invest in the

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Speaker 2: time with the kids. I can't wait to play again.

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Speaker 2: Ask me how I did in the game.

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Speaker 3: No, I'm not asking. You were the most ridiculously competitive person.

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Speaker 2: I was not competitive. I just played with a good strategy.

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Speaker 3: Oh my goodness, you know what. You know it's no

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Speaker 3: feat to win to a nine year old.

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Speaker 2: Oh there was a nine year old, there was a

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Speaker 2: thirteen year old, and an almost sixteen year old.

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Speaker 3: Can I just say what. I absolutely loved Your game

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Speaker 3: went for like what three hours?

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Speaker 2: About two and a half hours.

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Speaker 3: It was a long game. But Emily came in at

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Speaker 3: one point and she said I just lost. And I said, oh, Emily,

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Speaker 3: she said, it's okay, It's only a game.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we set it up beforehand. I said, some people

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Speaker 2: are going to get beaten in this game. This game

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Speaker 2: definitely has a winner and everyone else loses. When you lose,

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Speaker 2: you've got to be cool with it. You'll have another

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Speaker 2: game later. Can I just want to be really clear

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Speaker 2: about this. I bought and owned a hotel on every

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Speaker 2: single property along the first part of the board and

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Speaker 2: the second part of the board. I owned everything from

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Speaker 2: go to jail to free parking. I owned all of

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Speaker 2: easing the kids with the hotel on every single one

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Speaker 2: of them. Every time the kids got to free Parking

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Speaker 2: and moved towards Shado, They're like, oh, fantastic, I'm going

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Speaker 2: to And then they would get towards go and they

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Speaker 2: started crying. They're like, oh no, we're about to die.

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Speaker 3: Definitely tears. There was lots of laughter, demolished. There was

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Speaker 3: a lot of noisy demolished them.

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Speaker 2: It was so good.

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Speaker 3: But I did. I loved and let's be real, kinesiology

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Speaker 3: helped you get through that game. I'm telling you right

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Speaker 3: now that the kids would not have coped without her.

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Speaker 2: Our old did better tomorrow. Take home messages this, Take

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Speaker 2: the kids to wherever you need to take them to

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Speaker 2: get the help that you need, because it is worth it.

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Speaker 2: Be open minded and playboard games even though you hate them,

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Speaker 2: because it's amazing how much fun it is to destroy

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Speaker 2: your children their monopoly. We hope that you've enjoyed this

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Speaker 2: episode of Happy Families podcast, which has gone on far

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Speaker 2: too long, but thanks for persisting with us. The Happy

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Speaker 2: Families Podcast is produced by Justin Ruland from Bridge Media.

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Speaker 2: Craig Bruce is our executive producer. Oh I should just

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Speaker 2: mention as well. Coming up, we've got our brand new summit.

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Speaker 2: It's called the Smells Like Teen Spirit Summit. If you

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Speaker 2: haven't checked it out, please visit us at happy families

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Speaker 2: dot com dot you, or our Facebook or Instagram pages.

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Speaker 2: Doctor Justin Coulson's Happy Families