Speaker 1: Flex and Frooms Flex and Frooms. This is the Flex
Speaker 1: and Frooms catch up podcast.
Speaker 2: It is Flexing Rooms on Cada. We've heard the cliche
Speaker 2: chivory is not dead. I, in my personal experience would
Speaker 2: tend to agree, but if we zoom out into the macro,
Speaker 2: I would say otherwise. So I did some googling when
Speaker 2: did chivalry die. This all started because I was out
Speaker 2: with a friend on a friend date because we do
Speaker 2: go on those, and she called me handsome because we
Speaker 2: were laughing about how the endearment to women can be
Speaker 2: quite like I don't know, just yeah, kind of like that,
Speaker 2: like give me something.
Speaker 1: With some grit, you know.
Speaker 2: But then she called me handsome. We did some googling
Speaker 2: and it originally was used to endear women, so I'm like,
Speaker 2: this is right on brand, thank you. And then she
Speaker 2: called me chivalrous. Were picking her up, taking her out,
Speaker 2: paying for it, and then taking her home. I'm like,
Speaker 2: I am chivalrous. That was a chivalrous thing to do.
Speaker 2: And then in unison we said chivalry is not dead.
Speaker 2: That took me to the internet Google rabbit hole. So
Speaker 2: first I was like, wait, what is chivalry, because like
Speaker 2: I thought it was something that men do to women
Speaker 2: right do to specifically city men part take in. After
Speaker 2: some googling, I found out that chivalry is very polite, honest,
Speaker 2: and kind behavior, especially but not exclusively men towards women.
Speaker 2: It refers to an out of date standard that should
Speaker 2: or should not govern relationships between men and women, especially
Speaker 2: in a romantic context. Quite loosely good standards for male
Speaker 2: behavior towards people, specifically women. But the concept of chivalry
Speaker 2: came about when nights were around. It was a code
Speaker 2: for them as upstanding representatives over the kingdom to abide by.
Speaker 2: So it wasn't just for dating. It was how do
Speaker 2: they treat people? How do they discern who to fight with,
Speaker 2: who not to fight with, who to kill, who not to.
Speaker 1: Kill, How to court, how not to court?
Speaker 2: I said, babe, there's something here. There's fully like ten
Speaker 2: commandments of chivalry, Like it goes deep. But my point
Speaker 2: is chivalry died because of war. You say how, And
Speaker 2: don't be fooled because if you google what happened to
Speaker 2: chivalry they'll be like feminist skilled it.
Speaker 1: It's not the feminess.
Speaker 2: Bain believe us adam Ory died like a thousand years
Speaker 2: ago because of war. So basically what had happened is
Speaker 2: all of these men felt really empowered to be living
Speaker 2: this upstanding life and behaving in a way that was
Speaker 2: aligned and very admirable, and they would go to war
Speaker 2: and they'd be like, oh, my goodness, we are the
Speaker 2: big dogs, we are the people who are doing life right,
Speaker 2: and then would come back really disillusioned when they realized
Speaker 2: what they were fighting for, which is often futile, and
Speaker 2: caused them to be really quite like sad about the reality.
Speaker 2: And that's when chivalry died. When the Knights were like,
Speaker 2: this is not noble behavior. This is they said, we've
Speaker 2: we've seen it. This is treacherous. So the next time
Speaker 2: someone says chivalry is not dead. According to the Internet,
Speaker 2: it did die in one thousand CE, and we're in
Speaker 2: twenty twenty three CE, so more than a thousand years ago. However,
Speaker 2: there's room to bring it back, and we are lead
Speaker 2: by example.
Speaker 3: I'm definitely seeing it from our conversations. Truly, I will
Speaker 3: say back in the night days, you know the C word,
Speaker 3: I'm not going to say it on it. And don't
Speaker 3: worry Mickey, Mick, he's panicking. I can feel the panic.
Speaker 1: Next to me is it the word that Micky's mouth,
Speaker 1: the rude word.
Speaker 3: Yes, this is the rude word starting with tea. That
Speaker 3: actually means in the night time, like when nights are
Speaker 3: around the sheath that they put their.
Speaker 1: Sword in. People are so creative, seriously so creative.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 2: I made a threat, and I was talking about how
Speaker 2: I've started to introduce romance into my platonic relationships because
Speaker 2: it's fun, right, It's fun to go on dates with
Speaker 2: your friends.
Speaker 1: It's fun to treat them well.
Speaker 3: It's fun when you accidentally send me eighty dollars into
Speaker 3: my bank account thinking that it was for Michayla's present. Yeah,
Speaker 3: And then I said, do you want it back? And
Speaker 3: you said no, no, you just get laster onto it.
Speaker 1: I thought, whoa trust? The trust system is in full force.
Speaker 2: Hold onto it. It's fun and funny. You know, you
Speaker 2: want to be the big dog, be the big dog
Speaker 2: you want to see in the world. And I think
Speaker 2: it does wonders because I think generosity begets generosity. But
Speaker 2: I also just like the way it feels to make
Speaker 2: people's lives easier. No, take it back, not people.
Speaker 1: People I like. People.
Speaker 4: I love him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, people I love But then What had
Speaker 2: ended up coming from this thought was that if it's
Speaker 2: so easy to be chivalrous, why don't.
Speaker 1: People do it?
Speaker 3: Can I make some guesses please? Okay, first guess is
Speaker 3: pretty obvious. I think many people in order to be
Speaker 3: thinking this. It's like when men stopped opening doors because
Speaker 3: women are like, I can do it myself. Yeah, And
Speaker 3: then obviously we have a thought.
Speaker 1: And then we've had a little bit of.
Speaker 3: A residual fear factor moment with thanks to me too,
Speaker 3: as we know you.
Speaker 1: Say fear factor. Bring Joe Rogan in.
Speaker 3: Talking about that the other day, about guys like being
Speaker 3: too scared to make the first real because we really
Speaker 3: scoot up. You just have spook boys. And now I
Speaker 3: would say we're at the forefront of this. Now we
Speaker 3: lead understanding that really getting a door open, getting a
Speaker 3: meal paid for really is the spice of life. So
Speaker 3: that's one theory. My other theory is that modern day
Speaker 3: life is hard and men have other priorities at all
Speaker 3: the ones I know adding men to their Spotify, but
Speaker 3: there's other ones in the trenches.
Speaker 2: Look be the software you want to see. Because I
Speaker 2: started making playlists with people, I said, let me get
Speaker 2: in on this.
Speaker 1: When did this become the riz ps. I look, I'm
Speaker 1: not quite sure.
Speaker 2: But also here are my theories, right, I feel like
Speaker 2: it has something to do with building secular societies. So
Speaker 2: when you build or when you like curate nurture societies
Speaker 2: that are separate from religion, what also happens is that
Speaker 2: it becomes quite lawless. Right, All rules and traditions and
Speaker 2: norms get kind of pushed away or considered to be
Speaker 2: archaic or the opposite of progressive. Right, It's like so unbecoming,
Speaker 2: and so in deciding that we're going to live in
Speaker 2: these secular places, we've.
Speaker 1: Left all of the good stuff behind. And also I
Speaker 1: feel like.
Speaker 2: Bringing religion back organized religion, bring back dogma. I think
Speaker 2: that chivalry stayed dead as a consequence of cliches. I
Speaker 2: feel like people forget that cliches exist for a reason.
Speaker 2: Common phrases exist for a reason. We're all saying chivalry
Speaker 2: is not dead, and yet why is my hand touching
Speaker 2: doors as a woman. So what I will say is
Speaker 2: we can think of all the reasons why it's gone.
Speaker 1: Let's think of a couple of reasons why we should
Speaker 1: bring it back.
Speaker 3: Number one, I hate touching doors. I never touched it
Speaker 3: all with my bare hand. I also have sanitize you
Speaker 3: with me all the time, wearing a long sleep really yeah,
Speaker 3: look at me. I will never touch a door.
Speaker 1: Yeah, this is crazy. That's number one clean girl era. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: get off it.
Speaker 3: Okay. I've been coming out with a little bit of
Speaker 3: like savage.
Speaker 1: Yeah, sage, what did I say to you earlier?
Speaker 3: Mikayla, I tell you to shut there?
Speaker 1: Yeah, he said it out.
Speaker 3: So I love Michayla Floriano.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're obsessed with Mickeyana the best. Honestly, I love you.
Speaker 3: I love you too, babe.
Speaker 1: Let's want to be everything for her chevalry.
Speaker 2: I think it also died because we as a peace
Speaker 2: people aren't really good at pro social behavior. Pro social
Speaker 2: behavior is doing things for people without the incentive of
Speaker 2: something being done for you in return.
Speaker 3: And I think that goes into do you actually believe
Speaker 3: altruism exists?
Speaker 1: Does it? Philosophy?
Speaker 2: Altruism? Does altruism exist? If a tree falls and applace you?
Speaker 1: Hear it? Added belonging and.
Speaker 4: Yeah, this is twenty twelve trauma eat still so I
Speaker 4: feel like, yes, pro social behavior or the death of
Speaker 4: pro social behavior, the rise of what do we owe
Speaker 4: each other.
Speaker 1: All goes hand in hand with anti chivalry culture.
Speaker 3: Which is also, like you say about religion, every man
Speaker 3: for himself.
Speaker 1: What's that called individualism Darwinism?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, but they ate with that because that's
Speaker 3: why we're here.
Speaker 1: They literally ate too.
Speaker 2: We're not ending on a you should or you shouldn't.
Speaker 2: Just know that this is the kind of life that
Speaker 2: I'm trying to live. I was with a guy the
Speaker 2: other day, yeap.
Speaker 1: Need I stop there?
Speaker 3: No, And we were like going around the city, like
Speaker 3: to all different venues, and he would open the door
Speaker 3: for me every time, and we were walking up a
Speaker 3: lot of stairs, would always wait.
Speaker 1: For me yep. And I went to say, oh, you
Speaker 1: don't need to, and.
Speaker 3: I thought, no, don't do that, because, as we know
Speaker 3: from all of my reading, men like to feel useful.
Speaker 1: Is that what we got? It's a manipulation technique by me.
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