1 00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:04,600 Speaker 1: The Rising Conquer Podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of the 2 00:00:04,680 --> 00:00:08,320 Speaker 1: land which this episode is being recorded, the yugen Bear region. 3 00:00:08,920 --> 00:00:13,320 Speaker 1: We further acknowledge country throughout Australia and their connections to land, 4 00:00:13,520 --> 00:00:16,840 Speaker 1: sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders 5 00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:20,880 Speaker 1: past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal 6 00:00:20,960 --> 00:00:34,159 Speaker 1: and terrestrid Islander peoples Today. Hello and welcome back to 7 00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:37,360 Speaker 1: the Rise and Conquer Podcasts. This is the podcast for 8 00:00:37,560 --> 00:00:51,120 Speaker 1: ordinary people who want to do extraordinary things. I'm just 9 00:00:51,159 --> 00:00:52,800 Speaker 1: going to say it like we'll plan when we're having 10 00:00:52,880 --> 00:01:07,759 Speaker 1: sex sometimes be like her first nap. Hello and welcome 11 00:01:07,760 --> 00:01:10,399 Speaker 1: back to the Rise and Conker Podcast. It is your host, 12 00:01:10,440 --> 00:01:16,839 Speaker 1: Georgie Stevenson. Guys, today is our fun Friday episodes Geez Hotline, 13 00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:21,840 Speaker 1: where me and a tea answer your saucy questions with 14 00:01:21,920 --> 00:01:27,760 Speaker 1: our very unqualified advice. Yes, very unqualified. So guys, today's 15 00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:30,399 Speaker 1: a bit of a mom ep We like to keep 16 00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:34,880 Speaker 1: to a theme and all these questions are based around 17 00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:38,960 Speaker 1: like becoming a mom, finding your spark, your relationship after 18 00:01:38,959 --> 00:01:41,880 Speaker 1: becoming a mom, and also how to parent your child 19 00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:47,160 Speaker 1: so you don't give them limiting beliefs. Important yes, very 20 00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:50,240 Speaker 1: important stuff. Before we get into the episode, A Tia, 21 00:01:50,880 --> 00:01:53,640 Speaker 1: what's your recommendation for the week? Ooh, I love that 22 00:01:53,680 --> 00:01:56,120 Speaker 1: we're surprised. Yeah, every time we do this, even know 23 00:01:56,360 --> 00:01:57,160 Speaker 1: we know shit. 24 00:01:57,960 --> 00:02:03,920 Speaker 2: My recommendation is to find something that you can put 25 00:02:03,920 --> 00:02:08,600 Speaker 2: into your schedule once a week for you and yourself only, 26 00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,919 Speaker 2: that you genuinely enjoy and you find filled your cup. 27 00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:14,799 Speaker 2: I recently found out that when I have like a 28 00:02:14,919 --> 00:02:17,760 Speaker 2: nice bubble bath with some nice smelling oils in the 29 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:23,280 Speaker 2: water and a face mask, I feel so relaxed after that. 30 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:26,000 Speaker 2: I've now tried to do that at least like once 31 00:02:26,040 --> 00:02:28,000 Speaker 2: a week. I try and aim for a Sunday night, 32 00:02:28,040 --> 00:02:30,360 Speaker 2: so I'm like really fresh on a Monday. But it 33 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:34,400 Speaker 2: makes a big difference to like my sleep, my creativity, 34 00:02:34,520 --> 00:02:36,880 Speaker 2: I find because I just like totally relax and not 35 00:02:36,919 --> 00:02:37,840 Speaker 2: think about anything. 36 00:02:38,639 --> 00:02:40,880 Speaker 1: I love that you're listening to anything in the bath. 37 00:02:41,080 --> 00:02:43,960 Speaker 2: Sometimes I'll pop on like a trash TV kind of show, 38 00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:47,080 Speaker 2: but nothing too intense, Like it's just very much like 39 00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:48,400 Speaker 2: mind off kind of time. 40 00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:53,600 Speaker 1: Whatever. I've been watching. The new season of Dynasty just 41 00:02:53,639 --> 00:02:58,880 Speaker 1: came out on Netflix. Is it Dynasty or Dynasty? Probably Dynasty. Oh, 42 00:02:58,919 --> 00:03:00,959 Speaker 1: I don't know. Yeah, so you know, if I've just 43 00:03:01,040 --> 00:03:05,760 Speaker 1: came in, that's like my little bit of watching the background. Yeah, 44 00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:07,760 Speaker 1: that is a trash TV that I would also like. 45 00:03:08,600 --> 00:03:12,280 Speaker 1: My recommendation for the week is head to Naked Harvests 46 00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:16,200 Speaker 1: Stories tomorrow. Oh yes, we are doing the live reveal 47 00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:22,200 Speaker 1: of my seconds recommendation, my second. We're doing the live 48 00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:27,560 Speaker 1: reveal of our biggest drop collection of the year. I'm 49 00:03:27,560 --> 00:03:30,919 Speaker 1: so excited. It's been such a fun week. By fun, 50 00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:35,520 Speaker 1: I mean stressful. No, it's just it's outside. We don't 51 00:03:35,520 --> 00:03:37,200 Speaker 1: know if it's going to rain. It's a whole big 52 00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:40,840 Speaker 1: thing we have all, you know, just locking in an 53 00:03:40,880 --> 00:03:44,320 Speaker 1: event is just huge. It's just so much to think 54 00:03:44,360 --> 00:03:48,119 Speaker 1: about and so many like little moving parts. So it's 55 00:03:48,120 --> 00:03:50,000 Speaker 1: just been a lot of work. But oh my god, 56 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:52,880 Speaker 1: I'm so incredibly excited to like share it with the 57 00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:57,560 Speaker 1: NH gang. So if you're an RNC listener who's also 58 00:03:57,560 --> 00:04:00,440 Speaker 1: in the NH Gang, make sure you're on the Naked 59 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:03,880 Speaker 1: Harvest Stories and feed because we're revealing it all in 60 00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:06,360 Speaker 1: real time, so you'll feel like you're at the vent 61 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:09,240 Speaker 1: with us. That's so cool. Yeah, and I'm so excited. 62 00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:11,480 Speaker 1: It's just I hope you guys like it. Can I 63 00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:14,760 Speaker 1: give them a hint? It's like, stop, I don't want 64 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:21,120 Speaker 1: to get killed. Why no one listens to us? I 65 00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:23,279 Speaker 1: just want to give them a hint. This is just 66 00:04:23,360 --> 00:04:27,400 Speaker 1: for you a listeners, and it's this is fulfilling my 67 00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:33,360 Speaker 1: childhood dreams. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I like that. All right, 68 00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:41,479 Speaker 1: let's get into the episode. 69 00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:45,039 Speaker 2: Our first question. Hey, Georgie, I'm really needing some advice. 70 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:48,520 Speaker 2: I've recently just gone back to work part time after 71 00:04:48,560 --> 00:04:50,960 Speaker 2: having a baby, and I'm on struggle street when it 72 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:54,200 Speaker 2: comes to finding my groove again. I feel super stuck 73 00:04:54,320 --> 00:04:57,960 Speaker 2: and lost and I'm lacking motivation. I also work in 74 00:04:58,000 --> 00:05:01,280 Speaker 2: a creative role, which is even worse because my creativity 75 00:05:01,360 --> 00:05:02,680 Speaker 2: has just been sucked out. 76 00:05:02,760 --> 00:05:07,200 Speaker 1: How when you find out? Can you let me know? No? 77 00:05:07,560 --> 00:05:11,120 Speaker 1: I love this question. I know we're doing more mum questions. 78 00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:15,080 Speaker 1: This hotline a tear, but I love this question so 79 00:05:15,240 --> 00:05:20,359 Speaker 1: much because it's exactly how I felt and am feeling. 80 00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:23,600 Speaker 1: It's like, I wish I had more of a do 81 00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:25,680 Speaker 1: this and do this and do that, and you'll feel 82 00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:28,840 Speaker 1: it this way. But I'm starting to realize when you 83 00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:34,200 Speaker 1: have a child, it is literally a I used to say, 84 00:05:34,320 --> 00:05:36,880 Speaker 1: a death of your old self. But I was talking 85 00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:38,599 Speaker 1: to mel about it the other day and she's like, 86 00:05:38,640 --> 00:05:41,320 Speaker 1: stop calling it a death because it feels negative. You 87 00:05:41,440 --> 00:05:45,240 Speaker 1: need to call it a rebirth. Oh. So she's like, 88 00:05:45,279 --> 00:05:48,480 Speaker 1: don't use that language. So I'm trying to rephrase it, 89 00:05:48,560 --> 00:05:51,680 Speaker 1: and she's like, call it a rebirth. So it is 90 00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:56,520 Speaker 1: very much every birth because you are a completely new person. 91 00:05:56,960 --> 00:05:59,280 Speaker 1: And I think what we tend to do is get 92 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:03,120 Speaker 1: really stuck on I used to be this person. I 93 00:06:03,240 --> 00:06:05,599 Speaker 1: used to do this, and that's how life used to be. 94 00:06:06,240 --> 00:06:10,440 Speaker 1: But what I'm trying to do is reframe my thoughts 95 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:14,560 Speaker 1: and feelings to you know, this is completely new and 96 00:06:14,640 --> 00:06:19,840 Speaker 1: how exciting. And it's not completely clear at the moment 97 00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:23,840 Speaker 1: how I find motivation, how I do this, but I'm 98 00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:26,760 Speaker 1: on my way to finding out. If you think about it, like, 99 00:06:26,880 --> 00:06:31,720 Speaker 1: before this person had her baby, her life was a 100 00:06:31,720 --> 00:06:35,360 Speaker 1: certain way for you know, twenty odd years, maybe thirty 101 00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:37,280 Speaker 1: odd years. I don't know how she is, and so 102 00:06:37,640 --> 00:06:39,960 Speaker 1: it would have felt comfortable and she would have got 103 00:06:39,960 --> 00:06:42,000 Speaker 1: there and she would have like edged her way there. 104 00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:44,599 Speaker 1: And then you have a baby and it's like taken 105 00:06:45,040 --> 00:06:48,880 Speaker 1: not taken away, But you have to completely find yourself 106 00:06:49,320 --> 00:06:50,680 Speaker 1: and it's so hard. 107 00:06:51,720 --> 00:06:54,440 Speaker 2: Have you found other ups and downs with you feeling 108 00:06:54,440 --> 00:06:56,120 Speaker 2: yourself or is it sort of just. 109 00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:59,200 Speaker 1: Like yeah, it low no. So sometimes I'm like, oh 110 00:06:59,240 --> 00:07:02,120 Speaker 1: my god, I found my spark again. I've found my 111 00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:05,400 Speaker 1: creativity again. And I'm like having this really great week 112 00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:09,280 Speaker 1: Ivy sleeping and like things at work are just like 113 00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:13,880 Speaker 1: clicking yeah. And then the next week, oh no, I'm like, 114 00:07:14,280 --> 00:07:17,400 Speaker 1: I don't have any creativity. I feel like I don't 115 00:07:17,440 --> 00:07:21,160 Speaker 1: even know who I am. Like, really, I have not 116 00:07:21,440 --> 00:07:25,560 Speaker 1: felt stability yet. So okay, that's why I'm like, am 117 00:07:25,600 --> 00:07:29,680 Speaker 1: I qualified dance? We're not qualified to answer any of 118 00:07:29,720 --> 00:07:34,160 Speaker 1: the questions. But I just think you almost need to 119 00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:38,960 Speaker 1: get comfortable with being uncomfortable with this change. And what 120 00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:42,800 Speaker 1: I have been doing is holding on to the little moments, 121 00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:47,600 Speaker 1: So the little moments of at the moment, I've kind 122 00:07:47,640 --> 00:07:50,120 Speaker 1: of worked things in a way that Ivy goes to 123 00:07:50,160 --> 00:07:52,400 Speaker 1: sleep at seven pm, and I don't know what I 124 00:07:52,440 --> 00:07:54,000 Speaker 1: was doing beforehand, but you know, I used to go 125 00:07:54,080 --> 00:07:56,680 Speaker 1: on my phone and this and that, and as soon 126 00:07:56,720 --> 00:08:00,680 Speaker 1: as she goes to bed, I either eat or I've 127 00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:04,040 Speaker 1: already eaten dinner, and I make myself a moonmilk, and 128 00:08:04,160 --> 00:08:07,160 Speaker 1: I don't touch my phone and I read a book. 129 00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:10,920 Speaker 1: So from seven o'clock that's literally like an hour and 130 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:13,440 Speaker 1: a half of reading a book and maybe journaling. And 131 00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:16,960 Speaker 1: I'm like, this is my time for just me. Yeah, 132 00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,840 Speaker 1: and really, and I've had to be like really strict 133 00:08:19,840 --> 00:08:22,400 Speaker 1: on myself with this and be like, no, read your book. 134 00:08:22,440 --> 00:08:25,360 Speaker 1: And I've got five different books currently on my bed 135 00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:28,280 Speaker 1: because I don't want to like pigeonhole myself and be like, well, 136 00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:29,680 Speaker 1: I don't feel like reading that, so I'll just go 137 00:08:29,720 --> 00:08:30,320 Speaker 1: on my phone. 138 00:08:30,440 --> 00:08:30,800 Speaker 2: Yeah. 139 00:08:30,880 --> 00:08:34,520 Speaker 1: So I've got five different books, one self development, one's fiction, 140 00:08:35,240 --> 00:08:39,320 Speaker 1: one's How to Be a Goddess. I was telling him 141 00:08:39,320 --> 00:08:41,120 Speaker 1: a tear about this new book I'm reading, but I'll 142 00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:43,360 Speaker 1: tell you guys about it later, and then I'm really 143 00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:45,439 Speaker 1: trying to have that time something else that me and 144 00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:48,280 Speaker 1: him were talking about, because I love that she's talking 145 00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:51,120 Speaker 1: about this creativity thing, because I think I feel like 146 00:08:51,160 --> 00:08:54,440 Speaker 1: this is something no one talks about. I feel the 147 00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:56,880 Speaker 1: exact same way. I've even used the language like I 148 00:08:56,920 --> 00:09:02,480 Speaker 1: feel like Ivy has sucked out make creativity. And I 149 00:09:02,520 --> 00:09:04,720 Speaker 1: don't mean that in a bad way, like I'm not 150 00:09:04,960 --> 00:09:08,200 Speaker 1: blaming Ivy no, not at all. But I really do 151 00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:11,839 Speaker 1: think children take a lot of like I don't know. 152 00:09:12,080 --> 00:09:15,320 Speaker 2: And when you say creativity, do you mean that you 153 00:09:15,360 --> 00:09:18,120 Speaker 2: can't think of new things or you're just not I 154 00:09:18,160 --> 00:09:21,240 Speaker 2: feel sided by stuff or I feel foggy. 155 00:09:22,240 --> 00:09:26,360 Speaker 1: So and I realized this because during work, I work 156 00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:28,680 Speaker 1: and I implement things, and then what I used to 157 00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:31,400 Speaker 1: do on the weekend is I've spoken about this a lot, 158 00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:34,480 Speaker 1: like have my alone time and I would find my 159 00:09:34,840 --> 00:09:39,080 Speaker 1: creativities and my big creative ideas for like work or 160 00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:44,320 Speaker 1: my vision you know, my dreams would be after you know, 161 00:09:44,480 --> 00:09:46,760 Speaker 1: a gym session or if I'm journaling or if I'm 162 00:09:46,760 --> 00:09:50,160 Speaker 1: on the beach. It's like those times just don't happen 163 00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:54,520 Speaker 1: as often. So it's like that space and time for yourself. 164 00:09:54,559 --> 00:09:58,160 Speaker 1: And I was actually so the NHH Graphic Designer Mix. 165 00:09:58,320 --> 00:10:00,120 Speaker 1: She had a baby at the same time, and she's 166 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:03,640 Speaker 1: a graphic designer, like that is creative, and she she's 167 00:10:03,720 --> 00:10:06,520 Speaker 1: kind of saying the same thing, and she's like, yeah, 168 00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:09,880 Speaker 1: I'm feeling a girl, and she's just trying to like 169 00:10:10,040 --> 00:10:12,000 Speaker 1: work it out again and get in your group. But 170 00:10:12,040 --> 00:10:14,520 Speaker 1: I don't think I have like a great answer. I 171 00:10:14,559 --> 00:10:18,200 Speaker 1: think it's just you need to find little things, try 172 00:10:18,320 --> 00:10:21,520 Speaker 1: a whole bunch of things, and also realize that it's 173 00:10:21,600 --> 00:10:24,360 Speaker 1: like you're just had a baby, like being a bit 174 00:10:24,440 --> 00:10:26,800 Speaker 1: kinder to yourself or a human. I probably need to 175 00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:30,439 Speaker 1: be a bit kindish myself. Let's be honest. Yeah, but yeah, 176 00:10:30,559 --> 00:10:32,520 Speaker 1: that's what I'm trying to do. Also, I think a 177 00:10:32,640 --> 00:10:36,160 Speaker 1: big thing that has helped is being really strict to 178 00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:39,240 Speaker 1: my schedule, so you know, a tear. Recently, me and 179 00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:42,640 Speaker 1: Ellie sat down and every Friday we go over my 180 00:10:42,720 --> 00:10:46,040 Speaker 1: schedule for the next week, where not only do we 181 00:10:46,240 --> 00:10:48,680 Speaker 1: confirm all my meetings and we put in you know, 182 00:10:48,720 --> 00:10:51,920 Speaker 1: when I'm recording this podcast or meetings with mel, but 183 00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:55,640 Speaker 1: I'm also putting in creative time. So I'll literally put 184 00:10:55,760 --> 00:10:59,920 Speaker 1: in mourning to myself, or I'll put in a massage, 185 00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:04,200 Speaker 1: or I'll put in these things. And I'm just of 186 00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:06,679 Speaker 1: the opinion right now because I do feel a bit 187 00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:10,000 Speaker 1: in limbo, a bit foggy about everything, and I just 188 00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:14,320 Speaker 1: think I need some space rather than trying to be 189 00:11:14,440 --> 00:11:18,000 Speaker 1: creative or trying to do things. I'm like, I just 190 00:11:18,080 --> 00:11:20,600 Speaker 1: need to give myself some time and space, and I 191 00:11:20,640 --> 00:11:23,120 Speaker 1: feel like it will come. Yeah, I'll get back to 192 00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:29,160 Speaker 1: you though. Question number two. I love this question as well. 193 00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:31,640 Speaker 2: Hey, Georgy, I'm an iron c girl this round, and 194 00:11:31,679 --> 00:11:34,000 Speaker 2: I have always loved the way you talk about limiting 195 00:11:34,040 --> 00:11:37,720 Speaker 2: beliefs around what our parents have most of the time 196 00:11:37,760 --> 00:11:42,120 Speaker 2: subconsciously told us. For example, my mum has always told 197 00:11:42,120 --> 00:11:45,079 Speaker 2: me that I'm too much. I'm too driven and determined 198 00:11:45,120 --> 00:11:47,360 Speaker 2: and have been this way from the moment I was born, 199 00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:50,480 Speaker 2: and this led to me being afraid of going after 200 00:11:50,559 --> 00:11:53,240 Speaker 2: what I want in life. I now have a seven 201 00:11:53,240 --> 00:11:56,800 Speaker 2: month old daughter who is so similar to myself. How 202 00:11:56,840 --> 00:11:59,040 Speaker 2: can we break the cycle that has been passed down 203 00:11:59,080 --> 00:12:02,480 Speaker 2: in our family for so many generations to allow our 204 00:12:02,559 --> 00:12:06,400 Speaker 2: children to be exactly who they are, especially while acknowledging 205 00:12:06,440 --> 00:12:09,520 Speaker 2: who they are without talking down about it. We'd love 206 00:12:09,600 --> 00:12:12,640 Speaker 2: to even just know your own experience around this with Ivy. 207 00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:15,600 Speaker 1: Oh my god, I love this question so much. Me too. 208 00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:19,920 Speaker 1: Me and Tim actually had a conversation about this on 209 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:23,880 Speaker 1: the weekend at the beach, and we were kind of saying, 210 00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:28,520 Speaker 1: I truly believe, like my parents and like his parents, 211 00:12:28,559 --> 00:12:32,839 Speaker 1: I truly believe they did the best they could with 212 00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:35,560 Speaker 1: what they knew and what they had. Yeah, and so 213 00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:39,439 Speaker 1: even though now you know me and Tim are dealing 214 00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:42,120 Speaker 1: with I don't want to say subconscious, because they're conscious, 215 00:12:42,120 --> 00:12:45,240 Speaker 1: but we're dealing with stuff that it's like patterns or 216 00:12:45,240 --> 00:12:48,800 Speaker 1: beliefs our parents have given us that we realize are 217 00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:52,760 Speaker 1: a bit problematic or just not our truths, and we're 218 00:12:52,760 --> 00:12:55,640 Speaker 1: having to do the work to work through them and 219 00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:58,800 Speaker 1: protess it and have a new truth, etc. And I 220 00:12:58,840 --> 00:13:01,200 Speaker 1: was chadding to Tim, and I was saying, you know, 221 00:13:01,320 --> 00:13:03,959 Speaker 1: our parents did things the way they did because they 222 00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:08,960 Speaker 1: loved us, they thought they were helping us in whatever way. Yeah, 223 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:12,120 Speaker 1: And so a big thing that I think is important 224 00:13:12,559 --> 00:13:15,959 Speaker 1: is a first of all, which this person has already done, 225 00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:20,880 Speaker 1: is just being aware. So she's already aware that, oh 226 00:13:20,920 --> 00:13:24,640 Speaker 1: the way I say things, the thoughts I believe myself, 227 00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:27,680 Speaker 1: the way I treat myself. Because also children are just 228 00:13:27,720 --> 00:13:29,840 Speaker 1: always watching you. So this is going to have a 229 00:13:29,880 --> 00:13:32,520 Speaker 1: lot to do with like what you believe and how 230 00:13:32,559 --> 00:13:34,559 Speaker 1: you talk to yourself, and obviously how you talk to 231 00:13:34,640 --> 00:13:39,760 Speaker 1: your child, but like thinking how I'm you know, living 232 00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:42,320 Speaker 1: my life talking to myself and talking to my child 233 00:13:43,080 --> 00:13:46,679 Speaker 1: being aware first of all that they're going to go 234 00:13:46,800 --> 00:13:50,320 Speaker 1: into this world believing those things, whereas I don't think 235 00:13:50,360 --> 00:13:53,840 Speaker 1: this person's parent understood that. And I feel like my 236 00:13:53,960 --> 00:13:56,600 Speaker 1: parents and you know Tim's friends, the generation, they they 237 00:13:56,640 --> 00:13:57,920 Speaker 1: weren't thinking about their stuff. 238 00:13:58,080 --> 00:13:58,839 Speaker 2: No, not at all. 239 00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:01,120 Speaker 1: So she's already got the first step of oh, I've 240 00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:03,120 Speaker 1: actually got to like I'm aware that he needed to 241 00:14:03,160 --> 00:14:05,760 Speaker 1: be aware. Yeah, so I think that's such a great step. 242 00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:08,160 Speaker 1: The second thing I said to Tim is like, if 243 00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:11,840 Speaker 1: you think about it, if you need to learn something new. 244 00:14:11,920 --> 00:14:14,880 Speaker 1: For example, when I wanted to do law, I went 245 00:14:14,960 --> 00:14:17,240 Speaker 1: and got a law degree. Yeah, when I wanted to 246 00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:20,640 Speaker 1: start a podcast, I bought a podcast course. When I 247 00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:23,520 Speaker 1: you know, like when you want to do something, you 248 00:14:23,560 --> 00:14:25,560 Speaker 1: don't just go and well you can just go and 249 00:14:25,560 --> 00:14:28,320 Speaker 1: do it, but usually you're like, oh, give me some resources, 250 00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:30,960 Speaker 1: give me some like ideas, and then I'll go and 251 00:14:30,960 --> 00:14:32,920 Speaker 1: do it. So a big thing me and Tim spoke 252 00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:36,640 Speaker 1: about is we're actually going to do some like parenting courses. 253 00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:40,440 Speaker 1: That's cool. Yeah, some like online parenting courses that are 254 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:46,080 Speaker 1: very progressive, very woke, where it's like understanding how you like. 255 00:14:46,080 --> 00:14:49,000 Speaker 1: Because another thing me and Tim have literally I haven't 256 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:52,200 Speaker 1: had the full conversation, but where like I personally grew 257 00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:55,800 Speaker 1: up with my parents smacking me, and so did his parents. 258 00:14:56,320 --> 00:14:59,280 Speaker 1: And I know this is like a big debate, and like, 259 00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:02,680 Speaker 1: obviously I is not old enough to be disciplined because 260 00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:07,720 Speaker 1: she's an infant. She won't remember any ding. He's a potato, 261 00:15:08,960 --> 00:15:12,440 Speaker 1: so like it would be so he's so cute and 262 00:15:12,520 --> 00:15:15,240 Speaker 1: so like we need to have the conversation of how 263 00:15:15,280 --> 00:15:18,360 Speaker 1: we're going to you know, quote unquote discipline our children. 264 00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:21,920 Speaker 1: I love a lot of Brene Brown. I've heard her 265 00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:25,720 Speaker 1: on podcast talking about how she deals with her children 266 00:15:26,120 --> 00:15:29,880 Speaker 1: and it's so very groundbreaking and how she explains it 267 00:15:29,920 --> 00:15:33,440 Speaker 1: because obviously she's done so much research. What does she 268 00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:36,760 Speaker 1: do out of curiosity? I can't like, I don't want 269 00:15:36,760 --> 00:15:38,760 Speaker 1: to say because I'm going to butcher it. But for example, 270 00:15:38,920 --> 00:15:43,040 Speaker 1: who's that comedian. Oh, he's British. He's got the long 271 00:15:43,080 --> 00:15:47,240 Speaker 1: black hair, long black hair. He's been on Forgetting Sarah Marshall. 272 00:15:47,400 --> 00:15:49,480 Speaker 1: I love him so much. He's funny as shit. I 273 00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:50,160 Speaker 1: love that movie. 274 00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:53,840 Speaker 2: But I oh Russell Russell Brand, Yeah, the one that 275 00:15:53,960 --> 00:15:55,720 Speaker 2: was married to Katie parent Yeah. 276 00:15:55,920 --> 00:16:03,560 Speaker 1: He's funny. He's problematic but in everyone. So he's got 277 00:16:03,560 --> 00:16:07,640 Speaker 1: a podcast and Brene Brown went on his podcast. Oh 278 00:16:07,920 --> 00:16:10,560 Speaker 1: listen to that episode because she explains it right at 279 00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:13,480 Speaker 1: the end. Okay, And I remember taking this mental note. 280 00:16:13,480 --> 00:16:15,800 Speaker 1: I didn't actually have IVY then, but I remember thinking, 281 00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,240 Speaker 1: when I have children, I'm going to go research what 282 00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:20,880 Speaker 1: Brene Brown does because I love what she was talking about. 283 00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:26,400 Speaker 1: Like the concept was basically she obviously doesn't use physical force, 284 00:16:26,480 --> 00:16:29,280 Speaker 1: but she uses if you keep doing this, I will 285 00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:33,080 Speaker 1: take away your iPod and then holds to a wing. Yeah, 286 00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:35,720 Speaker 1: and doesn't you know yell, but she holds to it 287 00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:38,800 Speaker 1: and you've got to be willing to follow through because 288 00:16:38,840 --> 00:16:41,200 Speaker 1: otherwise your words mean nothing. And she goes into it. 289 00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:44,080 Speaker 1: But it was so interesting, and I remember like taking 290 00:16:44,080 --> 00:16:45,840 Speaker 1: a mental note, being like I have to do that. 291 00:16:46,280 --> 00:16:49,080 Speaker 1: But also I follow a lot of like positive parenting 292 00:16:49,320 --> 00:16:53,720 Speaker 1: I accounts on Instagram and they talk about, yeah, just 293 00:16:53,760 --> 00:16:56,800 Speaker 1: different ways to parent, and I think I'm just am 294 00:16:56,840 --> 00:17:00,560 Speaker 1: going to like do a bit of research and look 295 00:17:00,560 --> 00:17:02,320 Speaker 1: at and it's not gonna like I'm not going to 296 00:17:02,440 --> 00:17:05,879 Speaker 1: just do one. I'm going to like look into multiple 297 00:17:05,960 --> 00:17:09,399 Speaker 1: ways and then decide how we want to do it together. Yeah. 298 00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:12,160 Speaker 1: And also Tim was very open to doing that as well, 299 00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:15,439 Speaker 1: because once I explained the whole you know, our parents 300 00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:19,359 Speaker 1: did the best they could, whereas if we research and 301 00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:22,119 Speaker 1: we kind of have more information and then you know, 302 00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:25,320 Speaker 1: we parent iving in a certain way. At least we're 303 00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:27,159 Speaker 1: doing the best we can, but you know, with a 304 00:17:27,160 --> 00:17:30,680 Speaker 1: little more resources. Yeah, with resources, because it's a lot 305 00:17:30,720 --> 00:17:34,159 Speaker 1: easier today. So that's kind of how we're going to 306 00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:36,440 Speaker 1: go about it. My mom did the. 307 00:17:36,400 --> 00:17:39,640 Speaker 2: Exact same thing, did she, Yeah, Because obviously she got 308 00:17:39,640 --> 00:17:44,080 Speaker 2: parented very very traditionally, and she's a very strong person 309 00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:48,080 Speaker 2: and love her mum wasn't and even my Grandpa's like 310 00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:50,880 Speaker 2: very gentle, Like they're not very they wouldn't yell at anyone. 311 00:17:50,960 --> 00:17:53,200 Speaker 2: They'd just do whatever they could for people. Very giving, 312 00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:57,280 Speaker 2: and she obviously loves to do that too, but also 313 00:17:57,400 --> 00:18:00,520 Speaker 2: wants to hold her own when it's not okay, or like, 314 00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:04,120 Speaker 2: won't sacrifice too much for someone kind of thing. And 315 00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:06,280 Speaker 2: she just read a lot of books before she had 316 00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:09,560 Speaker 2: me and my sister, and that's how she like educated 317 00:18:09,600 --> 00:18:11,639 Speaker 2: herself for us. 318 00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:13,320 Speaker 1: I love, Yeah. 319 00:18:13,359 --> 00:18:16,439 Speaker 2: I did have another question for you too, when you 320 00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:20,119 Speaker 2: became parents, did you find a whole other set of 321 00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:22,800 Speaker 2: limiting beliefs you didn't even know you had? Kind of 322 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:27,400 Speaker 2: thing around becoming a parent, Like becoming a parent parenting Ivy, 323 00:18:27,760 --> 00:18:30,600 Speaker 2: and like, did you see things like obviously you said 324 00:18:30,600 --> 00:18:34,760 Speaker 2: you and Tim had this conversation about what your parents did. 325 00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:37,600 Speaker 2: Did that only come up after you had Ivy or 326 00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:39,480 Speaker 2: was it like just before you had Ivy while you 327 00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:40,520 Speaker 2: were pregnant. 328 00:18:40,160 --> 00:18:43,480 Speaker 1: Or yeah, I feel like definitely when we had Ivy, 329 00:18:43,560 --> 00:18:47,280 Speaker 1: a whole lot of stuff came up about we just 330 00:18:47,359 --> 00:18:49,760 Speaker 1: you think of things from a whole new perspective. And 331 00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:52,800 Speaker 1: I was actually talking to a girlfriend about this because 332 00:18:52,800 --> 00:18:56,199 Speaker 1: she's pregnant and she has a partner who isn't the 333 00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:59,360 Speaker 1: most open person, and they've recently been doing a lot 334 00:18:59,359 --> 00:19:03,520 Speaker 1: of community and I love it because it is you 335 00:19:03,520 --> 00:19:06,160 Speaker 1: don't really think about it until it's happening. But yeah, 336 00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:09,959 Speaker 1: we had I also just had a lot of limiting 337 00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:12,840 Speaker 1: beliefs around what it meant to be a parent. I 338 00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:17,040 Speaker 1: think I'm even like still dealing with is you very much? 339 00:19:17,080 --> 00:19:19,360 Speaker 1: You put it in a box of this is what 340 00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:22,199 Speaker 1: you should do, and this is what it should look like, 341 00:19:22,280 --> 00:19:24,679 Speaker 1: and if I choose to become a parent, this is 342 00:19:24,720 --> 00:19:27,239 Speaker 1: the way my life is going to be. Just like 343 00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:29,320 Speaker 1: a tear, Remember we were talking in the car. Me 344 00:19:29,359 --> 00:19:31,080 Speaker 1: and a tear were talking the car on the way 345 00:19:31,119 --> 00:19:35,399 Speaker 1: back from the path I was drawn k a Tia wasn't. 346 00:19:37,280 --> 00:19:39,680 Speaker 1: And I was expressing to a tear that I wanted 347 00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:43,439 Speaker 1: to go to Europe with Ivy, oh yes, whereas Previc 348 00:19:43,680 --> 00:19:45,720 Speaker 1: I was like, oh, I can't go to Europe with 349 00:19:45,760 --> 00:19:48,080 Speaker 1: a baby. I have to wait till she's twenty and 350 00:19:48,119 --> 00:19:50,439 Speaker 1: then I can go live my Europe dream. And then 351 00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:53,360 Speaker 1: I've seen like quite a few people on Instagram going 352 00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:55,440 Speaker 1: to Europe with our children, and I was like, wait, 353 00:19:55,480 --> 00:19:58,520 Speaker 1: is this a limiting belief? It is? And then I 354 00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:00,399 Speaker 1: was like to a Tia, it's fine, and I just 355 00:20:00,440 --> 00:20:01,680 Speaker 1: want to go to Europe and I'm just going to 356 00:20:01,720 --> 00:20:04,399 Speaker 1: bring a babysit. And then a tea was telling me 357 00:20:04,480 --> 00:20:07,560 Speaker 1: about a friend who had it an no pair, yeah, 358 00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:10,720 Speaker 1: a lot of her life and they yeah, they loved it. 359 00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:13,320 Speaker 2: They were like four kids, they're both their parents ran 360 00:20:13,359 --> 00:20:16,400 Speaker 2: this business together, and because they obviously didn't have time 361 00:20:16,440 --> 00:20:19,680 Speaker 2: to look after four kids and run their business, they 362 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:22,199 Speaker 2: just had o pairs while they were going up. I 363 00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:25,320 Speaker 2: think till the older two were over fifteen or something 364 00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:28,159 Speaker 2: like that, so quite a while. And it wasn't like 365 00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:30,639 Speaker 2: this lack of love situation. It was, oh, I have 366 00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:34,720 Speaker 2: more people that love me. Oh I love that because 367 00:20:34,720 --> 00:20:35,800 Speaker 2: which is just so much better. 368 00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:37,600 Speaker 1: I feel like a lot of stories you hear with 369 00:20:37,720 --> 00:20:40,199 Speaker 1: like O pairs or like babysitters is like, oh, the 370 00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:43,159 Speaker 1: parents were never there, the children are broken. It's like 371 00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:44,600 Speaker 1: always in the movies. 372 00:20:44,880 --> 00:20:45,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeh. 373 00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:48,679 Speaker 1: Which has a limiting belief, is such a limiting belief 374 00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:51,399 Speaker 1: And yeah, Tea was like, no, go to Europe with 375 00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:54,920 Speaker 1: your pair and live your list life. But it's I 376 00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:57,720 Speaker 1: even said that to Tim and he was like, oh, no, 377 00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:00,560 Speaker 1: we can't go to Europe. We can't go to your 378 00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:02,720 Speaker 1: other baby. We won't enjoy it. And I was like, 379 00:21:03,080 --> 00:21:07,560 Speaker 1: but what if we do? You better be going next year. 380 00:21:08,520 --> 00:21:10,560 Speaker 1: But this is what I'm talking about, Like that's a 381 00:21:10,640 --> 00:21:12,920 Speaker 1: limiting belief of being like, oh, well i'm parent now 382 00:21:12,960 --> 00:21:16,280 Speaker 1: so I can't do this, or even I'm gonna be 383 00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:20,120 Speaker 1: a bit controversial. Yeah, but even in inception, I'm gonna 384 00:21:20,119 --> 00:21:23,840 Speaker 1: be a bit like inception. But it's like me being oh, 385 00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:26,840 Speaker 1: I've just had a baby, so I'm not creative this. 386 00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:29,560 Speaker 1: Have I just broken through a limiting belief? 387 00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:37,200 Speaker 2: Yes, I know it, it's all on your head, that's 388 00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:38,040 Speaker 2: all in my head. 389 00:21:38,119 --> 00:21:40,880 Speaker 1: No, but it is I think no, like, clearly I'm 390 00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:43,480 Speaker 1: feeling this way. I don't want to discredit myself. No, 391 00:21:43,520 --> 00:21:46,480 Speaker 1: but like that's such a being like, oh, well, I've 392 00:21:46,520 --> 00:21:48,520 Speaker 1: just had a baby, so I have to feel this 393 00:21:48,560 --> 00:21:51,960 Speaker 1: way or I have to feel lost. No, I get 394 00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:54,560 Speaker 1: to this is my new self. I get to embrace it, 395 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:56,720 Speaker 1: and I'm gonna work through this in my journal tomorrow. 396 00:21:57,920 --> 00:22:01,600 Speaker 1: Time's good, All right. I feel like we got off 397 00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:04,600 Speaker 1: topic there, but I loved that question so much. What's 398 00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:07,760 Speaker 1: the next on? Letty? Last question? 399 00:22:08,440 --> 00:22:11,040 Speaker 2: Hey gee, I need some advice. I'm a new mum 400 00:22:11,119 --> 00:22:14,080 Speaker 2: to a fifteen month old. I've just gone back to 401 00:22:14,119 --> 00:22:18,000 Speaker 2: work and my hobby has always worked. We're currently struggling 402 00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:21,760 Speaker 2: with our relationship. Everything is obviously about bub and it 403 00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:25,160 Speaker 2: feels like there is almost no love left for each other. 404 00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:28,640 Speaker 2: Things are starting to feel a bit stale. I'm unsure 405 00:22:28,680 --> 00:22:31,679 Speaker 2: what to do. I haven't spoken to my partner about 406 00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:34,439 Speaker 2: this yet, but I think he is feeling the same too. 407 00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:42,239 Speaker 1: What do I do? I know? Feelia, I feel like 408 00:22:42,480 --> 00:22:44,359 Speaker 1: I love all these questions because I just feel like 409 00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:47,880 Speaker 1: anyone who has a child, you'll be like, yeah, feelua, Yeah, 410 00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:51,720 Speaker 1: I think this is such. This is actually again, me 411 00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:54,359 Speaker 1: and Tim spoke about this on the weekend. We actually 412 00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:57,640 Speaker 1: had Cooper and ashover for a family barbecue on Sunday 413 00:22:57,880 --> 00:23:02,560 Speaker 1: and we were talking about how different your relationship is 414 00:23:02,640 --> 00:23:05,080 Speaker 1: once you have children, and like Cooper and Ash they 415 00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:08,960 Speaker 1: had body when they were twenty one. Yeah, that's crazy, 416 00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:13,240 Speaker 1: so crazy, and they were just married. So they were like, yeah, 417 00:23:13,280 --> 00:23:15,280 Speaker 1: we dealt with this like, you know, seven years ago, 418 00:23:15,320 --> 00:23:19,119 Speaker 1: but welcome to the club. Yeah, well finally literally, and 419 00:23:19,160 --> 00:23:21,960 Speaker 1: you just until you have like I know everyone says this, 420 00:23:22,080 --> 00:23:24,520 Speaker 1: but until you have a child like it is, you 421 00:23:24,640 --> 00:23:28,920 Speaker 1: just don't realize. You don't realize. But since having Ivy, 422 00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:33,120 Speaker 1: like I think the biggest thing I've noticed is how 423 00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:36,040 Speaker 1: much I don't want to say, how much work a 424 00:23:36,080 --> 00:23:40,159 Speaker 1: relationship is. But before Ivy, I felt like me and 425 00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:43,359 Speaker 1: Tim in our relationship, we could probably like coast a 426 00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:46,719 Speaker 1: bit more and it would be fine. I wouldn't actually 427 00:23:46,720 --> 00:23:49,439 Speaker 1: have to put in that much effort because I don't know, 428 00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:51,399 Speaker 1: It's just like easier because I could do what I 429 00:23:51,440 --> 00:23:53,919 Speaker 1: want when I wanted, and so could he, And so 430 00:23:54,119 --> 00:23:56,400 Speaker 1: if I was ever lacking in something like I'd fill 431 00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:59,000 Speaker 1: up my own cup. Yeah, was when you have a child, 432 00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:02,080 Speaker 1: you can't just go out and leave. Yeah, like go out, 433 00:24:02,080 --> 00:24:04,399 Speaker 1: get a massage, that sort of stuff. Yeah, So you 434 00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:07,080 Speaker 1: have to be like so planned with your time, and 435 00:24:07,119 --> 00:24:08,879 Speaker 1: if someone wants to do something, you've got to organize 436 00:24:08,920 --> 00:24:10,919 Speaker 1: the other person. You've got to organize a babysitter. It 437 00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:15,600 Speaker 1: just makes it makes things difficult. So usually your time 438 00:24:15,640 --> 00:24:20,320 Speaker 1: together is the first thing to go. Whereas previously, if 439 00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:23,040 Speaker 1: I was feeling distant from Tim because you want it 440 00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:25,119 Speaker 1: like a big thing for us as quality time, I 441 00:24:25,280 --> 00:24:27,560 Speaker 1: just be like, this weekend, let's spend the day together, 442 00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:29,920 Speaker 1: and in some time with you, we would it would 443 00:24:29,920 --> 00:24:33,480 Speaker 1: be fine onto the next yea. Whereas with the Ivy, Yeah, 444 00:24:33,600 --> 00:24:36,080 Speaker 1: you just don't have any dumb together. So what I've 445 00:24:36,119 --> 00:24:39,040 Speaker 1: realized is like we've had to be very like, no, 446 00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:42,440 Speaker 1: we need to make time together. We need to book 447 00:24:42,480 --> 00:24:44,399 Speaker 1: in this or do that, or do this as a 448 00:24:44,440 --> 00:24:47,040 Speaker 1: family or when Ivy is sleeping, I'm just gonna say it, 449 00:24:47,080 --> 00:24:50,119 Speaker 1: like we'll plan when we're having sex sometimes because you 450 00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:58,679 Speaker 1: had to be like her first nap. He it's like 451 00:25:00,040 --> 00:25:06,000 Speaker 1: information TM, I T I'm just getting ready. It's not 452 00:25:06,119 --> 00:25:08,880 Speaker 1: all the honeymoon stage has gone to tea. 453 00:25:11,480 --> 00:25:14,840 Speaker 2: Do you find that even when you guys have quality 454 00:25:14,920 --> 00:25:18,960 Speaker 2: time and she's there, it's still a bit divided because you're. 455 00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:21,239 Speaker 1: Kind of having to like chake that she's okay all 456 00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:23,760 Speaker 1: the time. Yes, well, like if you go to the 457 00:25:23,760 --> 00:25:28,840 Speaker 1: beach together, correct, Yeah, you're gonna make sure she's not drowning. Yeah, 458 00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:31,720 Speaker 1: pretty much. Well, we were actually discussing this and it's 459 00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:35,320 Speaker 1: like it's getting easier because she's a bit more like 460 00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:39,520 Speaker 1: self sufficient. But for example, when she was like a newborn, Yeah, 461 00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:43,840 Speaker 1: she just needed so much attention all the time, especially 462 00:25:43,840 --> 00:25:45,280 Speaker 1: because she was a bit of a difficult new bond. 463 00:25:45,680 --> 00:25:47,879 Speaker 1: But now that she can like sit up and play 464 00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:51,240 Speaker 1: by herself, I'm not as worried, Yeah, because she can 465 00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:54,040 Speaker 1: just be to the side. Yeah, and you can kind 466 00:25:54,080 --> 00:25:57,120 Speaker 1: of keep your eye on her. But insaying that's so, yeah, 467 00:25:57,160 --> 00:25:59,680 Speaker 1: it's quite difficult. Even when you're meeting up with girlfriends 468 00:25:59,680 --> 00:26:02,080 Speaker 1: I've and you both have babies, I feel like the 469 00:26:02,119 --> 00:26:06,040 Speaker 1: conversation's really different because you're like you're not actually fully 470 00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:08,880 Speaker 1: there because you're like thinking about your baby. Yeah, what's 471 00:26:08,920 --> 00:26:12,280 Speaker 1: Ivy doing. So that's it's definitely a whole other thing. 472 00:26:12,480 --> 00:26:15,320 Speaker 1: But I kind of do think it's kind of like 473 00:26:15,600 --> 00:26:20,639 Speaker 1: this is what parenthood is. Yeah, I believe it sucks, 474 00:26:22,080 --> 00:26:23,520 Speaker 1: I know, but I don't want to say that because 475 00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:27,080 Speaker 1: it's also like the best thing ever. It's so beautiful. Bye. Yeah, 476 00:26:27,119 --> 00:26:28,760 Speaker 1: it's like all these things that you didn't really think 477 00:26:28,840 --> 00:26:30,159 Speaker 1: of and then you have a baby and you're like, 478 00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:36,480 Speaker 1: it's so hard to have a confo. Yeah. So I 479 00:26:36,520 --> 00:26:38,520 Speaker 1: guess like me and Tim even spoke about this and 480 00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:42,520 Speaker 1: we're like, we need to start doing date night. Yeah 481 00:26:42,680 --> 00:26:45,040 Speaker 1: have you started yet? No, Okay, you'll have to let 482 00:26:45,080 --> 00:26:47,520 Speaker 1: it ties like nights ten months old and we're like, oh, 483 00:26:47,520 --> 00:26:49,800 Speaker 1: we need to do Nate night. We just haven't done it, so, 484 00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:52,879 Speaker 1: you know, getting a babysitter locking it in. Cooper and 485 00:26:52,920 --> 00:26:56,400 Speaker 1: Ash are actually talking about they do a date lunch. 486 00:26:57,119 --> 00:26:59,840 Speaker 1: Oh clever, because I said, like night's like a little 487 00:26:59,840 --> 00:27:02,680 Speaker 1: bit difficult, a little bit hard, especially to get a babysitter. 488 00:27:02,760 --> 00:27:05,040 Speaker 1: So Ash will just get a babysitter and then like 489 00:27:05,160 --> 00:27:07,000 Speaker 1: come to the warehouse, they'll go to lunch and then 490 00:27:07,080 --> 00:27:09,800 Speaker 1: Coople just come back to work. That's clever. But again, 491 00:27:10,200 --> 00:27:12,920 Speaker 1: I just feel like I need all my work time. Yeah, 492 00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:16,640 Speaker 1: I know what you mean, because then it's interrupting your day. Correct, 493 00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:20,000 Speaker 1: But look which one five? Yeah, we've got to try 494 00:27:20,040 --> 00:27:21,480 Speaker 1: and find it, but we're like, we need to put 495 00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:24,080 Speaker 1: in that time. But also I think this person just 496 00:27:24,119 --> 00:27:27,199 Speaker 1: needs to have the conversation. Yeah. Sometimes I'll literally have 497 00:27:27,200 --> 00:27:30,480 Speaker 1: the conversation with Tim and be like, I feel so distant, 498 00:27:30,520 --> 00:27:32,720 Speaker 1: taught you can you give me some love and attention 499 00:27:32,960 --> 00:27:37,719 Speaker 1: And He's like, oh, you're so needy, but yes, I 500 00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:41,000 Speaker 1: love that. And it's like even since having if you 501 00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:45,080 Speaker 1: guys haven't listened, we just released a love language episode 502 00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:48,760 Speaker 1: on Tuesday, Yes, and I spoke about how me and 503 00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:51,520 Speaker 1: Tim found out each other's love languages. So something I've 504 00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:54,159 Speaker 1: been doing a tia So in the previous episode, I 505 00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:57,639 Speaker 1: was explaining that Tim's love languages are words of affirmation 506 00:27:57,840 --> 00:27:59,800 Speaker 1: and physical touch. So something we've been doing in the 507 00:27:59,840 --> 00:28:02,240 Speaker 1: more is like as soon as I wake up, I 508 00:28:02,320 --> 00:28:04,520 Speaker 1: used to like roll out of bed and like go 509 00:28:04,640 --> 00:28:09,120 Speaker 1: straight to Jim clothes, go to Jim. But I wake up, 510 00:28:09,359 --> 00:28:11,359 Speaker 1: I roll over to him and we have a little 511 00:28:11,359 --> 00:28:14,879 Speaker 1: snuggle and I'm like morning, love you, blah blah blah, 512 00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:17,639 Speaker 1: and then I hop off and do my thing. I 513 00:28:17,840 --> 00:28:19,959 Speaker 1: just like giving that. It's like a little bit extra, 514 00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:22,200 Speaker 1: a little bit extra love, and I feel like he's 515 00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:25,760 Speaker 1: been enjoying. I feel like he's been enjoying that love. 516 00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:28,919 Speaker 1: It's funny though, because I didn't really think about words 517 00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:33,040 Speaker 1: of affirmation for Tim, but he does. Like he's a 518 00:28:33,040 --> 00:28:35,080 Speaker 1: person who's always like we'll be walking, He'll be like 519 00:28:35,160 --> 00:28:38,360 Speaker 1: love you, like he always says it to me. I'm 520 00:28:38,360 --> 00:28:42,840 Speaker 1: always like, because like words are affirmation and are like 521 00:28:42,960 --> 00:28:46,360 Speaker 1: not that big for me. I'm like, prove to me, 522 00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:50,200 Speaker 1: do something for me and do an act of service, 523 00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:54,680 Speaker 1: and I'll love you. But I feel like since we 524 00:28:54,720 --> 00:28:58,080 Speaker 1: had that conversation, things have definitely like felt better. So 525 00:28:58,280 --> 00:29:01,400 Speaker 1: I'd be having that conversation and in regards to like 526 00:29:01,400 --> 00:29:04,560 Speaker 1: the relationship feeling stale. Yeah, try and put a bit 527 00:29:04,560 --> 00:29:04,920 Speaker 1: of like. 528 00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:13,400 Speaker 2: Scheduling your sex, that's what you said, scheduling yourself care, 529 00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:15,040 Speaker 2: which can be whenever you want. 530 00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:19,560 Speaker 1: I was aboud to say something so inappropriate that do 531 00:29:19,600 --> 00:29:25,280 Speaker 1: it I date you. No, I was just gonna say 532 00:29:25,440 --> 00:29:28,600 Speaker 1: the other day me and Tim woke up and had 533 00:29:28,640 --> 00:29:30,520 Speaker 1: sex before we even got add better. 534 00:29:30,520 --> 00:29:31,040 Speaker 2: And that's. 535 00:29:33,040 --> 00:29:38,720 Speaker 1: That's like I've heard. I said that to one of 536 00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:42,480 Speaker 1: my girlfriends and she was like, frez. She's like, I 537 00:29:42,560 --> 00:29:45,800 Speaker 1: was like, you're bloody dating for the best, And I 538 00:29:45,880 --> 00:29:51,760 Speaker 1: just thought, Oh, what is my life? That's good, isn't it? 539 00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:52,200 Speaker 2: Yeah? 540 00:29:52,240 --> 00:29:58,360 Speaker 1: It was great surprises. I don't know where we always 541 00:29:58,360 --> 00:29:59,680 Speaker 1: get here and we get so weird about it. I'm 542 00:29:59,680 --> 00:30:04,720 Speaker 1: getting a like on sweat. But also, yes, the date night. 543 00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:10,960 Speaker 1: Oh actually, so my good friend y Cinta, Yeah, got 544 00:30:11,000 --> 00:30:15,800 Speaker 1: me and Tim housewarming present a private chef to come 545 00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:17,880 Speaker 1: to the house to cook us dinner. Oh my god, 546 00:30:18,000 --> 00:30:20,360 Speaker 1: is that not the best gift ever? Like knowing me 547 00:30:20,400 --> 00:30:23,440 Speaker 1: as literally the best gift. I know. It's so bougie 548 00:30:23,480 --> 00:30:26,280 Speaker 1: of her. It's like she's very thoughtful. But that was 549 00:30:26,360 --> 00:30:28,800 Speaker 1: something I literally text him before and I was like, 550 00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:32,280 Speaker 1: book in the babysitter. We're doing that next Thursday. Oh, 551 00:30:32,320 --> 00:30:35,080 Speaker 1: I love that. So we need to like spicings up. 552 00:30:35,120 --> 00:30:36,960 Speaker 1: We need to not spicings up. I don't want to 553 00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:40,360 Speaker 1: use that language, but like, you know, just consistently book 554 00:30:40,440 --> 00:30:43,440 Speaker 1: things in. Oh. I feel like we went rogue again. 555 00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:47,800 Speaker 1: But guys, thank you so much for listening. I hope 556 00:30:47,800 --> 00:30:53,040 Speaker 1: you enjoyed this chaotic hotline as per usual. Yeah, thanks 557 00:30:53,080 --> 00:30:53,800 Speaker 1: so much for listening. 558 00:30:54,040 --> 00:30:59,800 Speaker 2: Amazing, Bye bye. 559 00:31:00,880 --> 00:31:04,400 Speaker 1: Thank you so much for listening to another episode of 560 00:31:04,440 --> 00:31:07,600 Speaker 1: the Rise and Conquer podcast. If you enjoyed it and 561 00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:12,000 Speaker 1: want more. Come connect with us on Instagram at Riseinconquer 562 00:31:12,240 --> 00:31:16,160 Speaker 1: dot podcast and join our Facebook discussion group, a Rise 563 00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:20,280 Speaker 1: and Concer podcast community. We're an independent podcast and we 564 00:31:20,360 --> 00:31:23,080 Speaker 1: have a small team, so we do appreciate your time 565 00:31:23,160 --> 00:31:25,920 Speaker 1: and support. If you have a spare moment, a follow 566 00:31:26,080 --> 00:31:30,000 Speaker 1: or subscribe on whatever platform you listen to would be 567 00:31:30,440 --> 00:31:34,120 Speaker 1: so amazing, And look, if you're feeling extra kind, a 568 00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:36,960 Speaker 1: review on Apple Podcasts would be great.