1 00:00:00,680 --> 00:00:04,920 Speaker 1: Hello, my name's Santasha Nabananga Bamblet. I'm a proud yr 2 00:00:04,960 --> 00:00:08,680 Speaker 1: the Order Kerni Whoalbury and a waddery woman. And before 3 00:00:08,680 --> 00:00:11,160 Speaker 1: we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I 4 00:00:11,160 --> 00:00:14,319 Speaker 1: would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land 5 00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:17,680 Speaker 1: of which this podcast is recorded on a wondery country, 6 00:00:18,120 --> 00:00:22,240 Speaker 1: acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming 7 00:00:22,320 --> 00:00:26,960 Speaker 1: through as this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing 8 00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:30,120 Speaker 1: and the storytelling of you to make a difference for 9 00:00:30,240 --> 00:00:32,640 Speaker 1: today and lasting impact for tomorrow. 10 00:00:33,320 --> 00:00:34,120 Speaker 2: Let's get into it. 11 00:00:34,800 --> 00:00:54,080 Speaker 3: She's on the Money. She's on the Money. 12 00:00:58,360 --> 00:01:01,040 Speaker 4: Hello, and welcome to She's on the the podcast for 13 00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:04,840 Speaker 4: millennials who want financial freedom. Do you ever feel like 14 00:01:04,959 --> 00:01:07,319 Speaker 4: everyone is just way ahead of you when it comes 15 00:01:07,319 --> 00:01:09,080 Speaker 4: to money? I don't know if you can relate to 16 00:01:09,120 --> 00:01:11,760 Speaker 4: this so much, but certainly, like maybe the people listening, 17 00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:14,080 Speaker 4: it kind of just feels like, no matter how far 18 00:01:14,160 --> 00:01:17,640 Speaker 4: you go, it feels like you still aren't where you 19 00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:20,240 Speaker 4: want to be, but also where everyone else is, it's 20 00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:22,720 Speaker 4: like so much further ahead. Like it just always feels 21 00:01:22,720 --> 00:01:23,840 Speaker 4: like you're running this rat race. 22 00:01:24,080 --> 00:01:24,640 Speaker 2: We all do it. 23 00:01:24,720 --> 00:01:26,720 Speaker 4: Points which is why we're talking today about the cost 24 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:30,640 Speaker 4: of comparison culture. On today's episode. My name is beck 25 00:01:30,720 --> 00:01:33,840 Speaker 4: Side and with me as always is Victoria Divine. Hello, 26 00:01:33,959 --> 00:01:34,479 Speaker 4: my friend. 27 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:37,360 Speaker 5: I'm excited to talk about this because we have talked 28 00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:40,160 Speaker 5: about comparison culture on the podcast before. It was honestly, 29 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:44,240 Speaker 5: like terrifyingly a couple of years ago. Back we've been 30 00:01:44,280 --> 00:01:47,200 Speaker 5: around a while, but you're right, like, I do go 31 00:01:47,319 --> 00:01:50,560 Speaker 5: through things and feel like I'm behind, and I think 32 00:01:50,600 --> 00:01:53,040 Speaker 5: if I had admitted that publicly to you, you'd be 33 00:01:53,080 --> 00:01:55,840 Speaker 5: like ve pull your head in, like when the pretty 34 00:01:55,840 --> 00:01:59,240 Speaker 5: girl goes, oh, I'm so ugly today, and you're like, absolutely, 35 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:01,440 Speaker 5: you are not sit down, Like what the heck? Like 36 00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:03,720 Speaker 5: you're the prettiest thing I've seen in my life. You know, 37 00:02:03,720 --> 00:02:06,760 Speaker 5: when someone says something and it feels unhinged, you're like, oh, 38 00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:09,760 Speaker 5: they can't believe that, Like, yes, absolutely not. What do 39 00:02:09,800 --> 00:02:11,239 Speaker 5: you mean you got up on the wrong side of 40 00:02:11,280 --> 00:02:14,320 Speaker 5: the bed. You're basically a supermodeled Like, yeah, that's what 41 00:02:14,360 --> 00:02:17,200 Speaker 5: it feels like when someone like me goes, oh, yeah, 42 00:02:17,240 --> 00:02:19,560 Speaker 5: the cost of comparison, like everyone's doing better than me 43 00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:22,760 Speaker 5: because it's public knowledge. They're like, I know, money and 44 00:02:22,800 --> 00:02:25,200 Speaker 5: I'm pretty good at it, and I've bought property and 45 00:02:25,280 --> 00:02:27,679 Speaker 5: you know, I'm good at investing, and I think lots 46 00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:29,720 Speaker 5: of people look at me and go just got it together. 47 00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:31,120 Speaker 5: Thank you for that. 48 00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:33,760 Speaker 2: I would like to keep that aura up that I'm 49 00:02:33,760 --> 00:02:34,560 Speaker 2: really good at money. 50 00:02:34,560 --> 00:02:37,400 Speaker 5: But there's always someone doing better, right, Like, it doesn't 51 00:02:37,440 --> 00:02:40,480 Speaker 5: matter what good position you get into, there's always going 52 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:43,440 Speaker 5: to be someone doing better, someone doing more, someone that 53 00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:46,600 Speaker 5: you can compare yourself with. So I think we need 54 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:51,519 Speaker 5: to contextualize it in that way because it's ridiculous totally. 55 00:02:51,560 --> 00:02:54,760 Speaker 5: Why aren't we just comparing ourselves to past us? Like hey, Beck, 56 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:57,720 Speaker 5: you know what twelve months ago, past you wouldn't have 57 00:02:57,760 --> 00:03:01,680 Speaker 5: even been comfortable having this conversation and you go, oh yeah, Actually, 58 00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:03,880 Speaker 5: Like if we think back to when you started on 59 00:03:03,919 --> 00:03:06,080 Speaker 5: the podcast, you were like, oh, I've never invested, and 60 00:03:06,080 --> 00:03:07,960 Speaker 5: now you're like, yeah, so my goal this year probably 61 00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:09,680 Speaker 5: going to invest, Like I've been looking at this and this, 62 00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:12,280 Speaker 5: and you know you're talking about ETFs like you know what. 63 00:03:12,280 --> 00:03:14,079 Speaker 2: They are now? Like do you know what I mean? 64 00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:17,280 Speaker 5: So like, let's compare to past us, not future us, 65 00:03:17,400 --> 00:03:19,240 Speaker 5: or you know what we could have been or the 66 00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:23,720 Speaker 5: missed opportunities, and I think you know, everybody to some 67 00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:26,720 Speaker 5: degree goes through this, and that's why we obviously have 68 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:29,520 Speaker 5: to talk about it in more depth today because to me, 69 00:03:30,240 --> 00:03:34,720 Speaker 5: the cost of comparison culture links so closely to our 70 00:03:34,760 --> 00:03:37,880 Speaker 5: mental health but also our finances, and to me, those 71 00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:39,920 Speaker 5: two things are incredibly important to talk about. 72 00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:43,400 Speaker 4: So we're here now. I completely agree that that's a 73 00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:45,960 Speaker 4: really good way to look at it. Actually, compare yourself 74 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:49,840 Speaker 4: to your past self. Unless your past self was thriving, 75 00:03:49,920 --> 00:03:52,280 Speaker 4: then compare yourself to I don't know, but. 76 00:03:52,240 --> 00:03:54,360 Speaker 5: Also look at that you did it like even if 77 00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:57,120 Speaker 5: they were thriving. Like Beck, you've done it before, you 78 00:03:57,160 --> 00:03:59,200 Speaker 5: can do it again. We can get back there, like 79 00:03:59,520 --> 00:04:02,440 Speaker 5: everyone falls off the bandwagon at some point with something 80 00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:05,520 Speaker 5: totally that's so true, but our community are gritty. It 81 00:04:05,560 --> 00:04:07,240 Speaker 5: means they get back up and try again. 82 00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:07,720 Speaker 6: Yeah. 83 00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:09,840 Speaker 4: Okay, So a little bit later in the episode, we 84 00:04:09,920 --> 00:04:13,480 Speaker 4: will give you some tips to help combat comparison culture. 85 00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:15,400 Speaker 4: But before that, let's talk about what it is and 86 00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:18,680 Speaker 4: why it holds such a power over us. Why are 87 00:04:18,720 --> 00:04:19,760 Speaker 4: we like this fee? 88 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:24,280 Speaker 5: I mean, firstly, let's talk about it from an evolutionary standpoint, 89 00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:27,800 Speaker 5: right like innately with social little creatures, but some more 90 00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:30,560 Speaker 5: than others, like you and I. But you and I 91 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:33,920 Speaker 5: and everyone alive today are basically descendants of a very 92 00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:36,400 Speaker 5: long line of people who knew how to fit in 93 00:04:36,440 --> 00:04:40,000 Speaker 5: with a pack, because that's what survival meant. And people 94 00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:42,840 Speaker 5: didn't really survive if you couldn't get into the pack 95 00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:45,640 Speaker 5: or if you were, you know, ostracized from the pack. 96 00:04:45,960 --> 00:04:47,960 Speaker 5: So I think it's really important to keep in mind 97 00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:52,599 Speaker 5: that we are a pack community at heart. And now 98 00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:55,080 Speaker 5: you look at the world and go, I don't even 99 00:04:55,080 --> 00:04:58,520 Speaker 5: know my neighbors, Like it's a very strange juxtaposition, Like 100 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:00,960 Speaker 5: there's all these quotes about you know, it takes a 101 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:03,120 Speaker 5: village to raise a child, and like you look at 102 00:05:03,160 --> 00:05:04,839 Speaker 5: it now and be like, I'm on the village talking 103 00:05:04,839 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 5: to my child, Like I'm not even gonna put them 104 00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:08,200 Speaker 5: on the internet, do you know what I mean? Like 105 00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:11,240 Speaker 5: the world is such a different place. But innately, we 106 00:05:11,279 --> 00:05:15,400 Speaker 5: are pack animals and we thrive when people around. 107 00:05:15,120 --> 00:05:15,880 Speaker 2: Us are thriving. 108 00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:18,320 Speaker 5: We kind of look to each other to get a 109 00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:20,839 Speaker 5: sense of ourselves as well and where we should be 110 00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:23,240 Speaker 5: in life. And so historically, if we're in a pack, 111 00:05:23,320 --> 00:05:25,599 Speaker 5: everything was kind of like shared. Did you get a 112 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:27,680 Speaker 5: piece of the animal that we just killed. Yep, great, 113 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:30,479 Speaker 5: did you great? Like we don't have different collections of 114 00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:32,120 Speaker 5: stuff when you live in a pack. You don't have 115 00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:34,039 Speaker 5: a house, you don't have you know, a car or 116 00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:37,279 Speaker 5: something more shiny, because the idea was always to you know, 117 00:05:37,600 --> 00:05:40,359 Speaker 5: contribute to the greater good and you know, essentially like 118 00:05:40,440 --> 00:05:43,320 Speaker 5: we only just wanted to survive and that's where we've 119 00:05:43,320 --> 00:05:46,480 Speaker 5: come from. But we're not in survival mode anymore. And 120 00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:50,520 Speaker 5: I think it's normal to compare ourselves, but it's also 121 00:05:50,680 --> 00:05:52,960 Speaker 5: something that we have to be really careful of because 122 00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:57,279 Speaker 5: I think immediately, because of this pack culture mentality, you go, well, 123 00:05:57,360 --> 00:05:59,480 Speaker 5: if their casa, I probably should have it m hm, 124 00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:04,760 Speaker 5: and immediately like, that's that pack culture overshadowing the way 125 00:06:04,760 --> 00:06:07,360 Speaker 5: that you're feeling, when in reality, we're now all our 126 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:10,120 Speaker 5: own little packs and we're running our own races and 127 00:06:10,160 --> 00:06:12,280 Speaker 5: we have different things to say. And I mean, I 128 00:06:12,320 --> 00:06:15,440 Speaker 5: don't think it's about just ignoring other people, right, but 129 00:06:15,560 --> 00:06:17,960 Speaker 5: I do think it's about checking in with our personal 130 00:06:18,040 --> 00:06:20,320 Speaker 5: values and not trying to keep up with the Joneses 131 00:06:20,360 --> 00:06:22,240 Speaker 5: next door because you don't know how much debt they're in, 132 00:06:22,600 --> 00:06:26,640 Speaker 5: and just keeping things sustainable for ourselves because yes, times 133 00:06:26,680 --> 00:06:30,320 Speaker 5: have changed, and yes you do want to compare yourself, 134 00:06:30,400 --> 00:06:32,080 Speaker 5: but like that doesn't mean it's constructive. 135 00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:33,680 Speaker 2: Even though you go, oh, well, you know. 136 00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:36,320 Speaker 5: If I compare myself to Beck, I'll become a better person, 137 00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:39,400 Speaker 5: you go, well, not really, like I'm really sorry, but 138 00:06:39,560 --> 00:06:42,400 Speaker 5: you might manifest yourself into Beck and then realize that 139 00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:45,240 Speaker 5: Beck had different values than you did, completely and you're 140 00:06:45,279 --> 00:06:48,239 Speaker 5: on a completely different life trajectory than you actually wanted 141 00:06:48,279 --> 00:06:48,839 Speaker 5: to be, right. 142 00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:50,599 Speaker 4: Yeah, because we are social creatures and it's a good 143 00:06:50,640 --> 00:06:54,520 Speaker 4: like way to figure out like oh am I tracking? 144 00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:57,880 Speaker 4: Or am I developing? Or am I where I should be? 145 00:06:58,240 --> 00:07:00,640 Speaker 4: Let me have a look at people my own a end. 146 00:07:00,560 --> 00:07:02,080 Speaker 2: Also where do you want to be? 147 00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:04,000 Speaker 5: Because like, if you look for people your own age, 148 00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:06,919 Speaker 5: like are they doing exactly what you want to do? 149 00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:08,640 Speaker 4: That's the thing. They're not doing exactly what I want 150 00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:11,080 Speaker 4: to do. The things that make me happy mean that 151 00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:13,000 Speaker 4: my life isn't going to look exactly like that. 152 00:07:13,160 --> 00:07:16,520 Speaker 5: I agree, all right, so I've gone full hippie dippy. 153 00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:18,920 Speaker 5: A couple of weeks ago, we had our team retreat 154 00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:21,600 Speaker 5: and I went away and I was like working with 155 00:07:21,680 --> 00:07:24,280 Speaker 5: our internal team, so you didn't get a guernsey. I'm 156 00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:26,440 Speaker 5: really sorry because it turns out you don't work for 157 00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:28,920 Speaker 5: me full time yet. But I will continue to rally 158 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:31,160 Speaker 5: and basically bully you into it at some point. But 159 00:07:31,800 --> 00:07:33,800 Speaker 5: I want to do a really quick exercise, and we 160 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:37,080 Speaker 5: were all about exercises on retreat, and I want us 161 00:07:37,080 --> 00:07:40,080 Speaker 5: to each share three things that we love that we 162 00:07:40,240 --> 00:07:44,600 Speaker 5: value really highly, that I guess motivates us to live 163 00:07:44,600 --> 00:07:47,400 Speaker 5: our best life or our favorite parts of our life, 164 00:07:47,440 --> 00:07:50,000 Speaker 5: and then explain, why would you prefer if I went first? 165 00:07:50,080 --> 00:07:51,160 Speaker 5: Or would you like to go first? 166 00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:54,840 Speaker 4: Maybe you go first? And shine you shy shine. 167 00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:57,960 Speaker 5: Okay, So I have three things that I've written down, 168 00:07:58,000 --> 00:07:59,360 Speaker 5: and I'm going to put you more on the spot 169 00:07:59,440 --> 00:08:00,440 Speaker 5: because I didn't prep you. 170 00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:03,720 Speaker 2: But minor like lame things, all right, So first thing. 171 00:08:03,840 --> 00:08:06,640 Speaker 5: First, we know that I adore my morning coffee with 172 00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:09,920 Speaker 5: my husband Steve and my dog. I feel like I 173 00:08:09,960 --> 00:08:12,080 Speaker 5: wake up in the morning and it's just like I'm 174 00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:14,480 Speaker 5: so happy to get out of bed at six am, like, 175 00:08:14,720 --> 00:08:17,480 Speaker 5: and on the days that my husband has to go 176 00:08:17,480 --> 00:08:21,120 Speaker 5: to work early, we literally prioritize getting up even earlier 177 00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:22,920 Speaker 5: so that we don't miss that part of our day. 178 00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:26,520 Speaker 4: To get that is very early, and I'm impressed. 179 00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:28,760 Speaker 2: But that's what's a value to me. And I'm also 180 00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:29,800 Speaker 2: mentioning it because I just. 181 00:08:29,720 --> 00:08:31,840 Speaker 5: Know I couldn't drag your sorry butt out of bed 182 00:08:32,160 --> 00:08:34,320 Speaker 5: to go on a five k walk every morning and 183 00:08:34,320 --> 00:08:35,320 Speaker 5: get a coffee with the dog. 184 00:08:35,360 --> 00:08:37,839 Speaker 2: You'd be like, have fun, guys, I'll be waiting here 185 00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:38,760 Speaker 2: for when you get back. 186 00:08:38,840 --> 00:08:41,840 Speaker 4: Right, I could think of a million things I'd feel 187 00:08:41,840 --> 00:08:42,480 Speaker 4: it to me. 188 00:08:42,880 --> 00:08:45,640 Speaker 5: That sets my day up, and like, I had to 189 00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:48,240 Speaker 5: be up at like four thirty this morning, right, a 190 00:08:48,240 --> 00:08:50,240 Speaker 5: whole heap of work to do. I had really early 191 00:08:50,320 --> 00:08:53,320 Speaker 5: interviews with the US and like, I'm so grateful for that, 192 00:08:53,760 --> 00:08:56,280 Speaker 5: but that was one thing that I missed because I'm not. 193 00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:57,920 Speaker 2: Getting up earlier than four thirty to go for a 194 00:08:57,920 --> 00:08:58,640 Speaker 2: walk with my husband. 195 00:08:58,679 --> 00:09:00,760 Speaker 5: In fact, yeah, I think if i'd that to him, 196 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:02,520 Speaker 5: he would be like, all right, that's where I draw 197 00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:03,000 Speaker 5: the line. 198 00:09:03,120 --> 00:09:04,560 Speaker 4: Yeah, may as well not go to bed. 199 00:09:04,720 --> 00:09:07,640 Speaker 5: Yeah, Like we're just not doing that, Victoria anyway. So 200 00:09:07,720 --> 00:09:10,560 Speaker 5: I think that's it. I love speaking at events and 201 00:09:10,640 --> 00:09:14,280 Speaker 5: in front of people, like I love big crowds of 202 00:09:14,360 --> 00:09:17,160 Speaker 5: people who are all on the same page, Like I 203 00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:20,120 Speaker 5: adore ow she's on the money events. I really love 204 00:09:20,559 --> 00:09:23,240 Speaker 5: connecting with such a big group of people, knowing that 205 00:09:23,320 --> 00:09:26,200 Speaker 5: the content that I'm sharing has an impact. And I 206 00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:27,920 Speaker 5: kind of know that if I said, Hey, Beck, so 207 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:30,000 Speaker 5: we're going to do an event, you'd be like, have fun, 208 00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:33,520 Speaker 5: I'm not coming. And if I said, hey, Beck, do 209 00:09:33,520 --> 00:09:35,360 Speaker 5: you want to go on stage? Like there's six hundred 210 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:37,000 Speaker 5: people at this event, Like, what would you say? 211 00:09:37,840 --> 00:09:40,200 Speaker 4: Look, it depends what we're talking about. I don't mind 212 00:09:40,240 --> 00:09:42,280 Speaker 4: a bit of I don't mind being the set of attention, 213 00:09:42,440 --> 00:09:44,600 Speaker 4: but in these kind of situations probably not. I'd probably 214 00:09:44,640 --> 00:09:46,480 Speaker 4: say I will sit in the crowd. 215 00:09:46,679 --> 00:09:49,120 Speaker 5: I'm just remembering back to when we won like the 216 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:51,760 Speaker 5: Podcast of the Year award and I was like. 217 00:09:51,920 --> 00:09:54,360 Speaker 2: Come up back, and you just stood there frozen and 218 00:09:54,400 --> 00:09:54,920 Speaker 2: you were like. 219 00:09:54,960 --> 00:09:59,640 Speaker 5: No, I got so scared, which is so fine, but 220 00:09:59,679 --> 00:10:03,440 Speaker 5: like so different. And then third, I like just hanging 221 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:06,439 Speaker 5: out on my own on the couch with my husband 222 00:10:06,520 --> 00:10:09,200 Speaker 5: sometimes if he's allowed. I always want my pets there. 223 00:10:09,240 --> 00:10:11,319 Speaker 5: Sometimes I even want my husband to bug off and 224 00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:13,600 Speaker 5: leave me alone so I can watch maths or like 225 00:10:14,240 --> 00:10:17,120 Speaker 5: the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City and not be interrupted. 226 00:10:17,559 --> 00:10:22,200 Speaker 5: And I enjoy that, but I prefer that time, sometimes 227 00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:25,480 Speaker 5: above and beyond going out and socializing with my friends. Yeah, 228 00:10:25,880 --> 00:10:28,640 Speaker 5: like I will literally say to them, sorry, I don't 229 00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:31,760 Speaker 5: have the social battery, like I don't want to come out, 230 00:10:32,080 --> 00:10:34,760 Speaker 5: and they respect it. That's fine, it's not a bad thing. 231 00:10:35,160 --> 00:10:37,199 Speaker 5: But I also know that's something you would never do. 232 00:10:37,600 --> 00:10:39,720 Speaker 5: Like if I said to you, hey, Beck, do you 233 00:10:39,720 --> 00:10:41,120 Speaker 5: want to go out? Do you want to sit home 234 00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:43,640 Speaker 5: on your own and watch a TV series? You'd be like, 235 00:10:43,679 --> 00:10:45,080 Speaker 5: why would I sit home on my own? 236 00:10:46,480 --> 00:10:47,839 Speaker 4: Exactly? You know me too well. 237 00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:49,559 Speaker 2: I've picked these strategically. 238 00:10:49,600 --> 00:10:51,240 Speaker 5: But now I want you to share three things that 239 00:10:51,280 --> 00:10:54,800 Speaker 5: you maybe thought about while I was talking about that 240 00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:57,240 Speaker 5: that you know you love and you highly value. 241 00:10:57,240 --> 00:10:58,080 Speaker 2: What do you reckon they are? 242 00:10:58,320 --> 00:11:01,120 Speaker 4: I did absorb all of that then just so happened 243 00:11:01,120 --> 00:11:02,959 Speaker 4: to think of my own three at the same time. 244 00:11:03,160 --> 00:11:04,520 Speaker 2: I promise, I was promised. 245 00:11:04,600 --> 00:11:07,719 Speaker 4: I was listening. Okay, So obviously, as you know, I 246 00:11:07,760 --> 00:11:09,480 Speaker 4: love rolling the grass. 247 00:11:09,480 --> 00:11:11,600 Speaker 2: I love being rolling in the grass. That's what you 248 00:11:11,640 --> 00:11:12,160 Speaker 2: got from. 249 00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:14,160 Speaker 4: It, Yeah, basically, And I know it's gonna sound very 250 00:11:14,160 --> 00:11:16,960 Speaker 4: different at six am, not six am ideally, but I 251 00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:20,480 Speaker 4: like rolling the grass, I like listening to I guess 252 00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:22,480 Speaker 4: it's like kind of like a meditation, being in the grass, 253 00:11:22,600 --> 00:11:25,320 Speaker 4: filling the grass, listening to the sounds around me, and 254 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:28,120 Speaker 4: just being ever present. You know, I love being present. 255 00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:30,520 Speaker 4: I've got to do that several times a week. Otherwise 256 00:11:30,960 --> 00:11:32,319 Speaker 4: Where am I? Where's my head at? 257 00:11:32,360 --> 00:11:32,560 Speaker 2: You know? 258 00:11:32,600 --> 00:11:34,960 Speaker 4: I always want to be where I am. That's one 259 00:11:35,040 --> 00:11:38,560 Speaker 4: thing that I really value. The second one is I 260 00:11:38,600 --> 00:11:40,120 Speaker 4: know this might come as a surprise, but I do 261 00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:41,760 Speaker 4: like an early morning gym session. 262 00:11:41,840 --> 00:11:44,160 Speaker 2: Oh absolutely not. That sounds terrible to me. 263 00:11:44,640 --> 00:11:47,360 Speaker 4: I mean, obviously in the moment, I hate it. 264 00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:49,080 Speaker 2: What's an early morning gan session to you? 265 00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:53,320 Speaker 5: Though? So like six thirty, No, four am, it's like seven. Oh, 266 00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:55,280 Speaker 5: that's good, but that's still early morning to a lot 267 00:11:55,320 --> 00:11:56,920 Speaker 5: of people. Still early morning to a lot of people. 268 00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:58,080 Speaker 5: But I just feel like I need to get out 269 00:11:58,120 --> 00:12:00,800 Speaker 5: of the ways so I can then enjoy joy what 270 00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:03,120 Speaker 5: is to come. And we never know what that is, 271 00:12:03,160 --> 00:12:03,640 Speaker 5: and that's. 272 00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:05,280 Speaker 2: Which gives me such anxiety. 273 00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:07,760 Speaker 5: We're talking about this the other day and I can't 274 00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:09,720 Speaker 5: remember if it was on Mike or off Mike, but 275 00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:13,240 Speaker 5: basically Beck said, oh, no, I never know what I'm 276 00:12:13,280 --> 00:12:16,319 Speaker 5: doing after work, And I was like, sorry, what, Like, 277 00:12:16,520 --> 00:12:18,640 Speaker 5: you don't know what you're doing after work and you're like, nah, 278 00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:21,080 Speaker 5: like I'll just see what my friends text me what 279 00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:23,200 Speaker 5: they're up to. And I was like, oh no, Like 280 00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:26,360 Speaker 5: after work, I know, like my plan and I will 281 00:12:26,400 --> 00:12:28,280 Speaker 5: be going home and I will be cooking dinner because 282 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:30,679 Speaker 5: I have an avocado that is going to go off 283 00:12:30,720 --> 00:12:32,600 Speaker 5: and if I don't use that that will give me anxiety. 284 00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:34,640 Speaker 2: And you're like, what, let the avo go off? 285 00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:37,439 Speaker 4: Yeah, let the avo be. She wants to go off. 286 00:12:37,520 --> 00:12:42,000 Speaker 4: Let it go off. But that is so true, and 287 00:12:42,040 --> 00:12:45,080 Speaker 4: this is where we differ. That is actually surprisingly going 288 00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:48,520 Speaker 4: to be my third one. So not making plans but 289 00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:51,840 Speaker 4: always just going with the flow and having something to 290 00:12:51,880 --> 00:12:54,520 Speaker 4: do is what brings me so much joy. 291 00:12:54,720 --> 00:12:56,160 Speaker 2: You know, I get it. 292 00:12:56,200 --> 00:12:58,920 Speaker 5: I feel like your phone is consistently going off with 293 00:12:59,000 --> 00:12:59,760 Speaker 5: like hey, Beck, what are you. 294 00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:00,760 Speaker 2: Up to you after work? 295 00:13:01,040 --> 00:13:02,680 Speaker 5: And you'd be like, oh, not much, and then you're 296 00:13:02,679 --> 00:13:05,120 Speaker 5: like at the pub straight after work with someone different 297 00:13:05,160 --> 00:13:08,040 Speaker 5: every night, or like catching up for a pizza, Like 298 00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:09,600 Speaker 5: you have the best social life. 299 00:13:09,640 --> 00:13:12,080 Speaker 2: When I sit back, I'm envious of it because I'm. 300 00:13:11,920 --> 00:13:15,439 Speaker 5: Like that's so wholesome, Like that's so nice, Like how 301 00:13:15,520 --> 00:13:18,240 Speaker 5: nice would it be to have this consistent group of 302 00:13:18,240 --> 00:13:19,199 Speaker 5: friends who just want your. 303 00:13:19,160 --> 00:13:21,080 Speaker 2: Attention, like, do you know what I mean? 304 00:13:21,440 --> 00:13:23,120 Speaker 5: I know what you mean, But then I know if 305 00:13:23,160 --> 00:13:25,160 Speaker 5: I put myself in your shoes, I'd be like, why 306 00:13:25,200 --> 00:13:26,960 Speaker 5: are you guys so obsessed with me? 307 00:13:27,120 --> 00:13:29,080 Speaker 2: Leave me alone? It's a work day. 308 00:13:29,160 --> 00:13:31,800 Speaker 4: On work days, we don't do socializing. I do want 309 00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:33,560 Speaker 4: you to know I don't have that many friends. It's 310 00:13:33,559 --> 00:13:35,959 Speaker 4: just the same few that they we're a going out 311 00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:38,760 Speaker 4: on their close friends. But you know, if a case 312 00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:41,880 Speaker 4: like I live, it's just me and live actually, but 313 00:13:42,559 --> 00:13:44,880 Speaker 4: you think like, oh, that kind of life looks fun. 314 00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:46,400 Speaker 4: But then if you were to live it, even for 315 00:13:46,440 --> 00:13:48,160 Speaker 4: a few days a few weeks, you'd be like, ah, 316 00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:50,680 Speaker 4: this actually is not bringing me any joy. And so 317 00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:54,439 Speaker 4: sometimes it is just we're kind of like gravitating toward 318 00:13:54,520 --> 00:13:56,720 Speaker 4: we actually love doing you know what I mean? 319 00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:58,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, I absolutely do. 320 00:13:58,120 --> 00:14:01,000 Speaker 5: And I feel like that's actually really cute list, which 321 00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:04,880 Speaker 5: is like completely juxtaposing my list, which is like go 322 00:14:04,920 --> 00:14:06,480 Speaker 5: on a walk in the morning with my dog and 323 00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:08,560 Speaker 5: you're like, get in the bin. I really like speaking 324 00:14:08,559 --> 00:14:10,920 Speaker 5: at events and you're like absolutely not. And then I'm like, 325 00:14:10,920 --> 00:14:12,959 Speaker 5: oh my gosh. I also really just love being by 326 00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:15,840 Speaker 5: myself and you're like ill, David, get out. I want 327 00:14:15,840 --> 00:14:18,880 Speaker 5: to ask, now, have you ever been scrolling through Instagram 328 00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:21,040 Speaker 5: and felt like a little bit jealous or a little 329 00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:23,760 Speaker 5: bit envs or even like a little bit insecure, like 330 00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:27,080 Speaker 5: you're not enough at that moment. When you see someone 331 00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:29,440 Speaker 5: that you follow showing off something, it could be like 332 00:14:29,440 --> 00:14:33,120 Speaker 5: a friend or more obviously like an influencer, So it 333 00:14:33,120 --> 00:14:34,560 Speaker 5: could be like them being on a trip or an 334 00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:35,640 Speaker 5: outfit or whatever. 335 00:14:35,680 --> 00:14:37,760 Speaker 2: It is, like, I feel like, is that a thing? 336 00:14:37,920 --> 00:14:39,960 Speaker 4: It pains me to say, but yes, absolutely, And I 337 00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:41,920 Speaker 4: think it's more so not so much influences going on 338 00:14:41,920 --> 00:14:45,360 Speaker 4: big trips, but it's like if I see friends going 339 00:14:45,400 --> 00:14:48,680 Speaker 4: out to big things like doing stuff, I'm like, I 340 00:14:48,720 --> 00:14:51,160 Speaker 4: want to be friends with you, and I feel sad 341 00:14:51,160 --> 00:14:52,960 Speaker 4: that we're not friends. How do I make this happen? Anyway? 342 00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:55,000 Speaker 5: You message them and you just go, hey, pal, want 343 00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:56,440 Speaker 5: to be friends because like you're real cool. 344 00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:58,200 Speaker 2: If you slid into my damns, I'd be like, Beg 345 00:14:58,240 --> 00:14:59,160 Speaker 2: wants to be my friend? 346 00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:02,360 Speaker 5: Yes, queen, I'll try that, all right, Well we can 347 00:15:02,400 --> 00:15:07,880 Speaker 5: be friends now, Okay? Winner sick, but I guess I 348 00:15:08,120 --> 00:15:10,960 Speaker 5: do this as well. I feel like TikTok's worse for 349 00:15:11,080 --> 00:15:13,680 Speaker 5: me because it's like video content. I feel like it's 350 00:15:13,720 --> 00:15:17,160 Speaker 5: more interactive. And also I'm really impulsive, but I see 351 00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:19,640 Speaker 5: people with things and I go, oh, I'd love that handbag, 352 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:21,560 Speaker 5: or I'd love that top, or I'd do this or 353 00:15:21,720 --> 00:15:24,280 Speaker 5: do that. And I find myself either clicking their like 354 00:15:24,360 --> 00:15:26,800 Speaker 5: link in bios and finding out where it's from and 355 00:15:26,840 --> 00:15:28,640 Speaker 5: you know, putting it on a wish list, or even 356 00:15:28,680 --> 00:15:32,360 Speaker 5: worse like actually purchasing it immediately without putting twenty four 357 00:15:32,400 --> 00:15:33,720 Speaker 5: hours between me and my spending. 358 00:15:34,480 --> 00:15:35,560 Speaker 2: Or I just get this. 359 00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:38,920 Speaker 5: Idea in my head that that's something I need, yeah, 360 00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:41,160 Speaker 5: and it's like it's not. And I just look at 361 00:15:41,160 --> 00:15:44,400 Speaker 5: it and go, even this influencer, they probably don't even 362 00:15:44,440 --> 00:15:46,280 Speaker 5: care about that product. It could have just been sent 363 00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:50,600 Speaker 5: to them. And I find myself consistently comparing but also 364 00:15:51,520 --> 00:15:55,280 Speaker 5: just feeling really overwhelmed by it and going, well, why 365 00:15:55,320 --> 00:15:55,920 Speaker 5: do I want that? 366 00:15:56,040 --> 00:15:56,120 Speaker 1: Like? 367 00:15:56,160 --> 00:15:57,920 Speaker 5: And sometimes it'll be late, late at night and I've 368 00:15:57,920 --> 00:15:59,960 Speaker 5: made this little wish list, and then the next day 369 00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:01,520 Speaker 5: I'm at work and I'm like, oh, I better open 370 00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:04,080 Speaker 5: my notes app and you know, just drop something down 371 00:16:04,120 --> 00:16:05,760 Speaker 5: really quickly, and I see something and I go, why 372 00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:07,600 Speaker 5: is that in there, like why did I have in 373 00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:09,760 Speaker 5: my head in that moment that that was something I 374 00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:13,400 Speaker 5: absolutely needed? And I think, you know, obviously we are 375 00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:16,840 Speaker 5: really different, and what motivates us and excites us and 376 00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:19,360 Speaker 5: how we get our energy is going to be really different. 377 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:21,400 Speaker 5: Let's say that you and I are both on the 378 00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:24,240 Speaker 5: journey to buying a new car, but our path to 379 00:16:24,280 --> 00:16:27,520 Speaker 5: that or what makes that look likely for us is 380 00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:29,920 Speaker 5: going to be really different. Like your values to begin 381 00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:32,720 Speaker 5: with about what car, and your savings patterns and your 382 00:16:32,760 --> 00:16:35,600 Speaker 5: plans and you know what you're going to use your 383 00:16:35,600 --> 00:16:38,600 Speaker 5: car for are going to be very very different to mine. 384 00:16:38,840 --> 00:16:42,680 Speaker 5: And I think that our obsession with social media makes 385 00:16:42,760 --> 00:16:46,000 Speaker 5: us feel this more acutely, like the danger of comparing 386 00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:49,080 Speaker 5: ourselves to others is that I guess comparisons are never fair. 387 00:16:49,120 --> 00:16:50,640 Speaker 2: You never see the full picture. 388 00:16:50,360 --> 00:16:53,920 Speaker 5: Right, Like the amount of times I have been sent 389 00:16:54,240 --> 00:16:56,600 Speaker 5: posts by my girlfriends being like, oh my god, this 390 00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,360 Speaker 5: bag is so cute that that influencer has and I 391 00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:01,520 Speaker 5: will reply and be like, yep, they probably got sent it, 392 00:17:02,040 --> 00:17:05,399 Speaker 5: or it was probably free, like there's no way that 393 00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:07,480 Speaker 5: they would pay five thousand dollars for that. They are 394 00:17:07,600 --> 00:17:10,720 Speaker 5: just promoting it, or oh this car is really cool. 395 00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:12,840 Speaker 5: I can't believe she achieved that. And I'm like, yep, 396 00:17:12,880 --> 00:17:15,040 Speaker 5: that's in brand new car with a big red bowl 397 00:17:15,040 --> 00:17:18,440 Speaker 5: on it and looks fantastic. But like, I'm pretty sure 398 00:17:18,440 --> 00:17:21,560 Speaker 5: that would be all financed, Like that's gonna be on debt. 399 00:17:21,600 --> 00:17:24,320 Speaker 5: There's no way that she's buying a sixty thousand dollar 400 00:17:24,359 --> 00:17:27,600 Speaker 5: car in cash. Like you know, you think back at 401 00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:30,240 Speaker 5: twelve months and I go, no, that doesn't make sense 402 00:17:30,280 --> 00:17:33,600 Speaker 5: for their financial situation. But we don't have that light 403 00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:36,600 Speaker 5: in those moments. You only see like the highlights reel. 404 00:17:36,720 --> 00:17:39,879 Speaker 5: I suppose, and while every single one of us is 405 00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:42,359 Speaker 5: unique and you know, things happen and it might not 406 00:17:42,480 --> 00:17:45,879 Speaker 5: be true. I think by comparing ourselves to the journey 407 00:17:45,960 --> 00:17:49,120 Speaker 5: of others, we're really negating our own road, and we're 408 00:17:49,160 --> 00:17:52,679 Speaker 5: demanding that the past be different to what it actually is. 409 00:17:52,760 --> 00:17:55,520 Speaker 5: Instead of honoring who we were and honoring past us 410 00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:57,880 Speaker 5: and you know, stepping up and being that human being 411 00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:00,920 Speaker 5: that passed us needs us to be, we're just putting 412 00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:04,159 Speaker 5: ourselves behind. And the demand we place on ourselves to 413 00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:06,560 Speaker 5: be like those people that we actually compare ourselves to 414 00:18:06,760 --> 00:18:09,760 Speaker 5: might actually be motivation for change, and that could be 415 00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:11,240 Speaker 5: a good thing, but like. 416 00:18:11,400 --> 00:18:12,520 Speaker 2: Why are you changing? 417 00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:16,000 Speaker 5: Is this actually leading to more feelings of like diminished 418 00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:19,480 Speaker 5: self worth when you're trying to be somebody else instead 419 00:18:19,480 --> 00:18:20,960 Speaker 5: of just who you were meant to be? 420 00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:21,720 Speaker 6: Yes? 421 00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:25,040 Speaker 2: So true? Like, oh it makes me very angry. 422 00:18:25,280 --> 00:18:28,200 Speaker 5: Yeah, that's fair, especially when I see people and they're 423 00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:31,439 Speaker 5: comparing themselves. It's less about me and more about like, 424 00:18:31,600 --> 00:18:33,960 Speaker 5: I hate that other people go through this because. 425 00:18:33,720 --> 00:18:34,919 Speaker 2: I know what that looks like. 426 00:18:35,200 --> 00:18:37,120 Speaker 5: Yeah, like I still do it, don't get me wrong, 427 00:18:37,160 --> 00:18:38,920 Speaker 5: but I feel like I might have stepped a little 428 00:18:38,920 --> 00:18:41,679 Speaker 5: bit beyond that. But then I can also really see 429 00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:44,680 Speaker 5: that happening to my friends, or that happening to other 430 00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:46,960 Speaker 5: people around me and or people in our community, and. 431 00:18:46,920 --> 00:18:48,960 Speaker 2: I go, stop it, Like, you're perfect the way that 432 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:49,360 Speaker 2: you are. 433 00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:53,720 Speaker 4: Yes, We're all where we're meant to be right here. 434 00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:56,360 Speaker 4: Isn't that get my phone case? 435 00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:57,199 Speaker 2: What does it say? 436 00:18:57,400 --> 00:18:59,480 Speaker 4: You're exactly where you need to be. I love that. 437 00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:02,200 Speaker 5: Yeah, And I think it's really important to consistently remind 438 00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:05,080 Speaker 5: yourself of that, because you are exactly where you need 439 00:19:05,160 --> 00:19:07,280 Speaker 5: to be, whether it feels that way or not. Like 440 00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:10,160 Speaker 5: you know how many times you felt I'm not meant 441 00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:12,240 Speaker 5: to be here like this is the worst ever, and 442 00:19:12,280 --> 00:19:14,320 Speaker 5: then something around the corner happens and you go, that 443 00:19:14,359 --> 00:19:16,080 Speaker 5: makes sense as to why I was in that position 444 00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:18,520 Speaker 5: or that mental space or whatever it was, so I 445 00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:20,200 Speaker 5: could appreciate this totally. 446 00:19:20,520 --> 00:19:22,240 Speaker 4: I do also just want to say that this is 447 00:19:22,280 --> 00:19:25,240 Speaker 4: a very privileged way to think. Sometimes we are not 448 00:19:25,600 --> 00:19:28,919 Speaker 4: always in a really good or safe or healthy place, 449 00:19:29,040 --> 00:19:31,640 Speaker 4: and to say like we are where we need to be. 450 00:19:31,800 --> 00:19:36,159 Speaker 4: It doesn't necessarily fit every single mold, but however, still 451 00:19:36,200 --> 00:19:39,600 Speaker 4: I feel like the entire message of this episode is 452 00:19:39,640 --> 00:19:41,680 Speaker 4: still relevant to those people as well, but. 453 00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:44,600 Speaker 5: I think embracing it for change is important. If you're 454 00:19:44,640 --> 00:19:47,080 Speaker 5: in a really shitty position right now, Let's be honest, 455 00:19:47,359 --> 00:19:49,080 Speaker 5: I don't want you to be there, you know. If 456 00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:50,760 Speaker 5: we can reframe it and go all right, well, we 457 00:19:50,760 --> 00:19:52,200 Speaker 5: want to get you out of that. This is going 458 00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:55,080 Speaker 5: to be a pivotal point in your life that I 459 00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:57,560 Speaker 5: know at some point you're not going to say I 460 00:19:57,600 --> 00:19:59,480 Speaker 5: really wish that that never happened. 461 00:19:59,600 --> 00:20:01,399 Speaker 2: You're going to that was really shitty. 462 00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:03,480 Speaker 5: It was never a nice time, but it's made me 463 00:20:03,520 --> 00:20:05,359 Speaker 5: who I am today like and I think that we 464 00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:09,560 Speaker 5: were to pivot our mindset as well and go you 465 00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:12,720 Speaker 5: know what people say, there's so many awful things that 466 00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:14,560 Speaker 5: happen in the world, right, and like, I would never 467 00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:17,639 Speaker 5: say that blanket about everything, but I think if you 468 00:20:17,640 --> 00:20:20,680 Speaker 5: can even change your mindset, that is going to help 469 00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:22,240 Speaker 5: you get to a better place faster. 470 00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:25,399 Speaker 4: Completely agree. V. I remember last year we're talking about 471 00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:27,600 Speaker 4: keeping up with the Joneses, and we had some stats 472 00:20:27,600 --> 00:20:30,440 Speaker 4: on what privilege looks like on a global stage. 473 00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:33,199 Speaker 2: So this is good. I know where you're going with this. 474 00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:36,760 Speaker 5: Yes, you you're just gonna You're just gonna like. 475 00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:37,520 Speaker 4: Humble us go. 476 00:20:38,040 --> 00:20:38,280 Speaker 6: Yeah. 477 00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:41,720 Speaker 4: I mean, basically, we found that if you have a 478 00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:44,399 Speaker 4: roof of your head, three meals a day, access to 479 00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:48,080 Speaker 4: running water, and you make more than forty thousand dollars 480 00:20:48,119 --> 00:20:50,320 Speaker 4: a year, you are in the top one percent of 481 00:20:50,359 --> 00:20:54,800 Speaker 4: the world in terms of the median annual household income. 482 00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:55,920 Speaker 2: Isn't that insane? 483 00:20:56,200 --> 00:20:56,720 Speaker 5: It is? 484 00:20:56,920 --> 00:20:59,600 Speaker 2: And so many times we're like, ah, I'm broke, I'm this, 485 00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:00,800 Speaker 2: I'm that. No, you're not. 486 00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:04,520 Speaker 5: I hate when people use those terms of reference when 487 00:21:04,520 --> 00:21:07,040 Speaker 5: they're not. If you're actually broke, you can talk about it. 488 00:21:07,080 --> 00:21:08,320 Speaker 5: I want to hear it. I want to help you. 489 00:21:08,359 --> 00:21:10,080 Speaker 5: I want to be on that journey. I do not 490 00:21:10,119 --> 00:21:13,160 Speaker 5: want to hear people saying I'm broke, knowing full well 491 00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:15,399 Speaker 5: they have ten thousand dollars in their savings account for 492 00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:19,199 Speaker 5: an emergency fund. Like that just makes me so frustrated 493 00:21:19,280 --> 00:21:22,679 Speaker 5: because it takes away from the gravity of that situation. Like, 494 00:21:22,760 --> 00:21:26,560 Speaker 5: if you are broke, that's really friggin' hart Like Beck, 495 00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:30,080 Speaker 5: you've been there, it's overwhelming. It must be frustrating when 496 00:21:30,160 --> 00:21:32,080 Speaker 5: other people come along and go, yeah, me too, and 497 00:21:32,080 --> 00:21:32,720 Speaker 5: you're like, hmmm. 498 00:21:32,840 --> 00:21:33,399 Speaker 2: It's a bit. 499 00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:35,480 Speaker 4: Different though in it, Like it is a bit funny 500 00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:37,600 Speaker 4: when I'm like, oh, I've got literally seven dollars to 501 00:21:37,800 --> 00:21:40,080 Speaker 4: payday and people are like, oh, same, I don't want 502 00:21:40,080 --> 00:21:43,120 Speaker 4: to dip into my savings. I'm like, ah see, see 503 00:21:43,160 --> 00:21:46,119 Speaker 4: that's where we differ my friends exactly. I want to 504 00:21:47,119 --> 00:21:48,280 Speaker 4: exactly what does that mean? 505 00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:52,560 Speaker 5: Yeah, So we found during that research that the world 506 00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:57,280 Speaker 5: median household income was nine thousand, seven hundred and thirty 507 00:21:57,320 --> 00:21:58,360 Speaker 5: three dollars. 508 00:21:58,600 --> 00:21:59,040 Speaker 2: Wow. 509 00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:02,760 Speaker 5: Okay, okay, that's I mean good and bad. But it 510 00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:05,320 Speaker 5: just puts in context as well that when we're talking 511 00:22:05,320 --> 00:22:06,920 Speaker 5: about this, Oh my god, did you see on social 512 00:22:06,920 --> 00:22:09,119 Speaker 5: media such and such got a handbag or I've been 513 00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:11,159 Speaker 5: thinking about a new car and you know, ha ha, 514 00:22:11,359 --> 00:22:13,399 Speaker 5: I'm broke. I have seven dollars in my account, but like, 515 00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:15,160 Speaker 5: I just really don't want to dip into my savings. 516 00:22:15,200 --> 00:22:18,399 Speaker 5: Like that is so privileged. And it's okay, I'm not 517 00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:20,600 Speaker 5: calling you out. Keep doing it, It's fine. But I 518 00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:23,040 Speaker 5: think we also need to step back and go, how 519 00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:25,840 Speaker 5: flipping lucky are we to live in a country where 520 00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:27,520 Speaker 5: you know, at the end of the day, Beck, if 521 00:22:27,520 --> 00:22:29,800 Speaker 5: you broke your leg, we could fix it for free. 522 00:22:29,920 --> 00:22:31,520 Speaker 2: That's not going to financially impact you. 523 00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:34,800 Speaker 5: Like you are in a world that supports you, and 524 00:22:34,840 --> 00:22:37,160 Speaker 5: that's not a privilege that is extended to the entire 525 00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:38,399 Speaker 5: population of this world. 526 00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:39,960 Speaker 2: I think we're really. 527 00:22:39,760 --> 00:22:43,080 Speaker 4: Lucky, totally grievy. We were like discussing before how different 528 00:22:43,080 --> 00:22:45,440 Speaker 4: we kind of all are. Would be fair to say too, 529 00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:47,919 Speaker 4: that we'd all have different levels of comfort when it 530 00:22:47,960 --> 00:22:50,680 Speaker 4: comes to like being in debt and one. 531 00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:52,719 Speaker 5: Hundred percent, And I think it really plays into your 532 00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:54,320 Speaker 5: education levels as well. 533 00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:55,960 Speaker 2: Right, Like you've been in debt. 534 00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:58,760 Speaker 5: I have been in debt, and at the time that 535 00:22:58,840 --> 00:23:00,800 Speaker 5: I got in debt, I hadn't no idea what that 536 00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:02,960 Speaker 5: really meant. I feel like I had some blinkers on, 537 00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:04,840 Speaker 5: and I was kind of like, well, this will be fine. 538 00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:06,520 Speaker 5: I was paid off, right, I'm sure that when you 539 00:23:06,560 --> 00:23:08,320 Speaker 5: were doing it you were like, is this fine? Like 540 00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:10,320 Speaker 5: I'll work it out later, right, Like, you just don't 541 00:23:10,320 --> 00:23:13,720 Speaker 5: go into it going this could impact my entire life, 542 00:23:13,760 --> 00:23:15,800 Speaker 5: because if I had sat you down and said at 543 00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:18,720 Speaker 5: the time, heyback, so the decisions that you're making, they're 544 00:23:18,760 --> 00:23:21,679 Speaker 5: really gonna if you up, yeah, it's going to put 545 00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:23,200 Speaker 5: you in a really shitty position. 546 00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:25,080 Speaker 2: I don't think you would have consented. 547 00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:26,560 Speaker 5: I think you would have been like, hold up, hold up, 548 00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:29,000 Speaker 5: hold up, No, I don't want whatever you're talking about. 549 00:23:29,440 --> 00:23:32,439 Speaker 2: You thank you, like, and I mean, sometimes it's. 550 00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:35,080 Speaker 5: Completely unavoidable, right, Like, I know you've shared a lot 551 00:23:35,119 --> 00:23:38,240 Speaker 5: of your debt journey on here, and it's not as 552 00:23:38,240 --> 00:23:41,280 Speaker 5: though you were just frivolous and went and spent a 553 00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:43,520 Speaker 5: whole heap of money on designer shit that you didn't need. 554 00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:47,240 Speaker 5: That wasn't your story, like yours was out of genuine need. 555 00:23:47,560 --> 00:23:50,320 Speaker 5: But even out of genuine need, you didn't have the 556 00:23:50,400 --> 00:23:53,440 Speaker 5: level of financial literacy to go, well, actually, how could 557 00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:55,560 Speaker 5: I structure this? Maybe I could X, Y and Z, 558 00:23:55,720 --> 00:23:58,080 Speaker 5: Like you just didn't have that, So I think you 559 00:23:58,160 --> 00:24:01,280 Speaker 5: never really know what's going on for so you cannot 560 00:24:01,359 --> 00:24:02,400 Speaker 5: judge their situation. 561 00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:04,840 Speaker 2: And when we say, oh, what's your risk to taking 562 00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:05,600 Speaker 2: on debt? 563 00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:10,040 Speaker 5: Like I am at current in more debt than I 564 00:24:10,119 --> 00:24:13,880 Speaker 5: have ever been in my entire life, beck, and I 565 00:24:13,920 --> 00:24:17,119 Speaker 5: am so grateful. I am because it is good debt, 566 00:24:17,440 --> 00:24:20,040 Speaker 5: Like it's for mortgages for the properties that I own, 567 00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:22,600 Speaker 5: and I am so grateful for that. But that is 568 00:24:22,640 --> 00:24:26,480 Speaker 5: a very different, very educated decision. And I remember getting 569 00:24:26,480 --> 00:24:31,240 Speaker 5: those mortgages and being so scared of getting them because 570 00:24:31,280 --> 00:24:34,720 Speaker 5: it was so much to undertake. But on the flip side, 571 00:24:34,760 --> 00:24:36,520 Speaker 5: I was not fearful at all when I took on 572 00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:39,440 Speaker 5: forty plus thousand dollars worth of personal debt, which was 573 00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:42,840 Speaker 5: actually even more detrimental to my financial wellbeing. So like 574 00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:44,480 Speaker 5: I just didn't know what I didn't know, and you 575 00:24:44,520 --> 00:24:47,320 Speaker 5: wouldn't either, Yes, And I guess you've got no idea 576 00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:51,080 Speaker 5: what somebody else's financial situation or financial literacy levels are. 577 00:24:51,760 --> 00:24:54,919 Speaker 5: Maybe they're in epic amounts of debt, but that's like 578 00:24:55,040 --> 00:24:56,879 Speaker 5: really normal to them, and they actually grew up in 579 00:24:56,920 --> 00:24:59,560 Speaker 5: a debt cycle, so they actually fear really comfy with 580 00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:02,560 Speaker 5: that I'm just happy with what's going on. Does that 581 00:25:02,640 --> 00:25:05,040 Speaker 5: mean that's going to be okay for you? Well, maybe 582 00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:07,600 Speaker 5: it is, but likely it's not. And I think that 583 00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:09,680 Speaker 5: that's where you need to go. Well, your journey is 584 00:25:09,720 --> 00:25:12,040 Speaker 5: not my jooney, and that's actually a really beautiful thing. 585 00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:14,359 Speaker 4: Yeah, I completely agree. This kind of reminds me. Do 586 00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:17,040 Speaker 4: you remember that old saying money doesn't buy happiness? 587 00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:19,720 Speaker 5: Yeah, I want to put that in the bin. I mean, yes, 588 00:25:19,840 --> 00:25:23,480 Speaker 5: I completely agree. But you know what money does do. 589 00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:26,719 Speaker 5: It brings some level of financial security, and you know what, 590 00:25:26,920 --> 00:25:29,320 Speaker 5: it also can take it away. So I guess being 591 00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:31,880 Speaker 5: in debt because you've bought too much stuff or made 592 00:25:31,880 --> 00:25:34,919 Speaker 5: a decision that compromises yourself is not great. But I 593 00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:37,960 Speaker 5: think that we need to remember that the saying money 594 00:25:37,960 --> 00:25:41,119 Speaker 5: doesn't buy happiness. I've never heard someone who's broker in 595 00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:41,800 Speaker 5: debt say. 596 00:25:41,600 --> 00:25:43,760 Speaker 4: That one hundred pece like I've. 597 00:25:43,560 --> 00:25:45,720 Speaker 5: Literally never heard it come out of the mouth of 598 00:25:45,800 --> 00:25:47,879 Speaker 5: somebody who's financially struggling. 599 00:25:48,080 --> 00:25:52,199 Speaker 2: Yes, Ve, don't worry. Money doesn't buy happiness. Can buy dinner, 600 00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:52,919 Speaker 2: do you what? 601 00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:56,000 Speaker 5: It can buy electricity, It can pay your water bill, 602 00:25:56,080 --> 00:25:57,280 Speaker 5: It can do so much. And do you know what 603 00:25:57,280 --> 00:25:59,639 Speaker 5: that does It takes stress off and people who are 604 00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:00,880 Speaker 5: less rest are happier. 605 00:26:01,200 --> 00:26:01,400 Speaker 4: Yeah. 606 00:26:01,440 --> 00:26:04,320 Speaker 5: So, like I agree the old saying money doesn't buy 607 00:26:04,359 --> 00:26:06,520 Speaker 5: happiness because it's not about the fancy things, it's about 608 00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:10,880 Speaker 5: basic needs. There's a level I reckon where we need 609 00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:13,720 Speaker 5: to all earn X and I mean this is scientifically proven. 610 00:26:13,800 --> 00:26:16,960 Speaker 5: It's a household income of about eighty five thousand dollars total. 611 00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:19,480 Speaker 5: And if you meet that more money doesn't contribute to 612 00:26:19,520 --> 00:26:22,360 Speaker 5: higher levels of happiness. That makes sense if you are 613 00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:26,000 Speaker 5: broke or in debt or financially struggling, I'd be pretty 614 00:26:26,000 --> 00:26:27,560 Speaker 5: happy to find fifty bucks on the ground. 615 00:26:27,720 --> 00:26:29,720 Speaker 4: Yeap, I completely agree. At the very least, it will 616 00:26:29,720 --> 00:26:34,399 Speaker 4: take away your anxiety, leaving space for happiness exactly. But V, 617 00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:35,679 Speaker 4: I think this is a really good time to go 618 00:26:35,720 --> 00:26:37,920 Speaker 4: to a really quick break. And on the flip side, 619 00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:40,960 Speaker 4: we're gonna give you some tips to help combat comparison culture. 620 00:26:41,119 --> 00:26:42,560 Speaker 2: I love this. Don't go anywhere. 621 00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:48,199 Speaker 4: Okay, we are back and V, what can we do 622 00:26:48,280 --> 00:26:51,119 Speaker 4: if comparison culture is breaking us and sending us broke? 623 00:26:51,440 --> 00:26:53,960 Speaker 2: There's heaps you can do. And I bet right now 624 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:56,800 Speaker 2: you're thinking, no, there's not the but there is I've 625 00:26:56,840 --> 00:26:57,680 Speaker 2: made a whole list. 626 00:26:57,880 --> 00:26:59,760 Speaker 5: We know how much I love a list, Believe it 627 00:26:59,760 --> 00:27:02,399 Speaker 5: when I see it. All right, Well, take my little 628 00:27:02,480 --> 00:27:04,000 Speaker 5: notes off me and I can have. 629 00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:05,480 Speaker 2: You read it out, all right. 630 00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:07,760 Speaker 5: So, first thing I've written down is we really need 631 00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:10,600 Speaker 5: to remind ourselves that our self worth is not based 632 00:27:10,640 --> 00:27:13,240 Speaker 5: on our behaviors or what we have or don't have. 633 00:27:13,720 --> 00:27:16,360 Speaker 5: Though it's quite all right to admire you know, your 634 00:27:16,359 --> 00:27:20,480 Speaker 5: colleagues wardrobe or like Beck's brand isshoes, or a friend's job, 635 00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:24,640 Speaker 5: our admiration should stop there, like, oh wow, they're nice, Beck, congrats, 636 00:27:24,920 --> 00:27:26,120 Speaker 5: you must love them full stop. 637 00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:26,760 Speaker 2: End of story. 638 00:27:27,080 --> 00:27:30,800 Speaker 5: Once we cross into comparing our own wardrobe or our 639 00:27:30,880 --> 00:27:33,160 Speaker 5: job to their job, we kind of enter a really 640 00:27:33,280 --> 00:27:36,080 Speaker 5: dangerous zone that might actually result in us feeling like 641 00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:37,120 Speaker 5: trash about ourselves. 642 00:27:37,200 --> 00:27:39,960 Speaker 2: Yeah, like Beck has such nice shoes. Oh my shoes 643 00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:40,920 Speaker 2: are not so good. 644 00:27:41,520 --> 00:27:43,960 Speaker 5: I'm distilling it down really simply, And you might go 645 00:27:44,040 --> 00:27:47,679 Speaker 5: via that such a stereotypical example, but I know you 646 00:27:47,760 --> 00:27:51,680 Speaker 5: know what I mean, Like it could be anything I've 647 00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:55,760 Speaker 5: then written down. We need to use those feelings of insecurity, anxiety, 648 00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:59,440 Speaker 5: or jealousy to send it into ourselves and see what 649 00:27:59,480 --> 00:28:03,400 Speaker 5: it is actually want, Like, why Beck, are you feeling 650 00:28:03,520 --> 00:28:07,439 Speaker 5: like that? Often those feelings are there as triggers that 651 00:28:07,560 --> 00:28:10,639 Speaker 5: make us want to change something in ourselves deeply. It 652 00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:13,560 Speaker 5: might be you're actually not very happy with your job 653 00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:15,320 Speaker 5: and you need to look for a new job. 654 00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:16,560 Speaker 2: It's not Beck's job that you want. 655 00:28:16,960 --> 00:28:18,919 Speaker 5: In fact, like you probably won't even like it, Like 656 00:28:18,960 --> 00:28:22,680 Speaker 5: you have such different values, Like if I am unhappy 657 00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:24,240 Speaker 5: in my job, I might look at you Beck and 658 00:28:24,280 --> 00:28:25,840 Speaker 5: go for ou do she loves her job, maybe I 659 00:28:25,840 --> 00:28:28,320 Speaker 5: should do what Beck does, Like she just looks so happy. 660 00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:30,600 Speaker 5: What you need to do is spend a little bit 661 00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:33,159 Speaker 5: more time with yourself and work out what that is. Like, 662 00:28:33,440 --> 00:28:36,399 Speaker 5: whatever it is, have a think about it. Because I 663 00:28:36,480 --> 00:28:39,600 Speaker 5: promise you spending money to get into the same position 664 00:28:39,640 --> 00:28:42,720 Speaker 5: as somebody else because you see their happiness, it's not going. 665 00:28:42,680 --> 00:28:43,520 Speaker 2: To change anything. 666 00:28:44,120 --> 00:28:47,800 Speaker 5: Sadly, next you're not going to be surprised with number 667 00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:51,560 Speaker 5: three I've written down, celebrate your achievements. I think it's 668 00:28:51,600 --> 00:28:54,880 Speaker 5: really important Beck to take time to appreciate your milestones, 669 00:28:54,920 --> 00:28:58,000 Speaker 5: like not through social media, not through like posting a 670 00:28:58,040 --> 00:29:00,920 Speaker 5: cute post or spending money, but like in a meanful 671 00:29:00,960 --> 00:29:03,600 Speaker 5: way in doing something that nourishes you and you go, wow, 672 00:29:03,680 --> 00:29:06,960 Speaker 5: I'm really proud of that. It could be as silly 673 00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:09,680 Speaker 5: as writing yourself a letter like write past you a 674 00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:12,560 Speaker 5: letter of how proud you are of how far you've gotten. 675 00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:14,920 Speaker 5: I promise when you sit down you feel like a 676 00:29:14,920 --> 00:29:16,520 Speaker 5: bit of a nufty doing it, you'll be like, this 677 00:29:16,600 --> 00:29:18,600 Speaker 5: is so lame. At the end of it, you'll be like, 678 00:29:18,680 --> 00:29:21,240 Speaker 5: I'm so proud of me. Like you don't even have 679 00:29:21,280 --> 00:29:23,160 Speaker 5: to show anyone. You could rip it up or burn it. 680 00:29:23,120 --> 00:29:23,680 Speaker 2: Like hide it. 681 00:29:24,040 --> 00:29:25,440 Speaker 4: Yeah, that's a really sweet idea. 682 00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:29,200 Speaker 5: The next is practice mindfulness. I think this is really important. 683 00:29:29,280 --> 00:29:31,560 Speaker 5: You are really good at this, so maybe you've got 684 00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:34,040 Speaker 5: some hot tips and tricks at some point for us 685 00:29:34,080 --> 00:29:34,640 Speaker 5: on how to. 686 00:29:34,520 --> 00:29:35,400 Speaker 2: Be more mindful. 687 00:29:35,680 --> 00:29:39,000 Speaker 5: I mean your version of mindfulness is literally rolling around 688 00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:41,760 Speaker 5: in grass listening to meditations. But like, I will take 689 00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:44,800 Speaker 5: your tips because you're hella happy, and then I've written 690 00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:48,800 Speaker 5: down implement healthier behaviors and boundaries around social media. I 691 00:29:48,960 --> 00:29:52,000 Speaker 5: genuinely believe that you should be unfollowing and muting things 692 00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:53,640 Speaker 5: that make you feel bad or that you see and 693 00:29:53,680 --> 00:29:56,720 Speaker 5: you just get a pang of anxiety or guilt. Yeah, hmm, 694 00:29:56,840 --> 00:29:59,000 Speaker 5: this is probably not something I want to say publicly, 695 00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:00,000 Speaker 5: but I'm gonna do it anyway. 696 00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:00,920 Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I'm scared. 697 00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:03,120 Speaker 5: I have heaps of people that I follow that I 698 00:30:03,160 --> 00:30:05,920 Speaker 5: have muted. Yeah, I don't want to unfollow you. I'm 699 00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:07,960 Speaker 5: not rude, like I like you as a human being. 700 00:30:08,280 --> 00:30:10,640 Speaker 5: Don't want to see stuff. Yeah, it just doesn't help 701 00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:13,520 Speaker 5: me live my best life. I always feel not amazing 702 00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:16,400 Speaker 5: about seeing it, or it annoys me or something. Sure, 703 00:30:16,520 --> 00:30:18,840 Speaker 5: the mute functionality is great. Don't have to tell you 704 00:30:18,880 --> 00:30:20,160 Speaker 5: I unfollowed you. No one knows. 705 00:30:20,440 --> 00:30:21,040 Speaker 4: Yeah, I love that. 706 00:30:21,080 --> 00:30:22,640 Speaker 2: Now people that I follow are going to be like, 707 00:30:22,760 --> 00:30:24,920 Speaker 2: is that me? Probably? 708 00:30:25,720 --> 00:30:29,640 Speaker 5: But people are monetizing your attention, Beck, that is worth something, 709 00:30:29,880 --> 00:30:32,000 Speaker 5: whether it's on social media or if it's on TV. 710 00:30:32,240 --> 00:30:34,400 Speaker 5: So I think that we really need to make sure 711 00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:37,320 Speaker 5: that they're working hard for your money and making you 712 00:30:37,360 --> 00:30:41,080 Speaker 5: feel good, inspired and super motivated. And then I guess 713 00:30:41,080 --> 00:30:43,160 Speaker 5: the last thing I do want to add in there, Beck, 714 00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:46,720 Speaker 5: We touched on it before is privilege. Obviously, but if 715 00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:50,560 Speaker 5: you're in financial trouble, speak to someone like, raise your 716 00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:52,920 Speaker 5: hand like it is not embarrassing. 717 00:30:52,960 --> 00:30:53,920 Speaker 2: You are not behind. 718 00:30:54,440 --> 00:30:58,760 Speaker 5: Your financial position does not dictate whether you are a 719 00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:00,400 Speaker 5: good or a bad human being. 720 00:31:00,760 --> 00:31:01,320 Speaker 2: Some of my. 721 00:31:01,440 --> 00:31:05,760 Speaker 5: Favorite people in this entire world are broke as hell, 722 00:31:06,240 --> 00:31:08,520 Speaker 5: and some of the people that I have met through 723 00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:12,480 Speaker 5: my journey as an ex financial advisor to ultra wealthy 724 00:31:12,520 --> 00:31:15,360 Speaker 5: people give me the biggest stick in the entire world. 725 00:31:15,720 --> 00:31:18,640 Speaker 5: Your personality and who you are as a human being 726 00:31:19,000 --> 00:31:20,640 Speaker 5: is not made up by money, is not made up 727 00:31:20,680 --> 00:31:23,360 Speaker 5: by how wealthy you are, how much money you've got 728 00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:25,240 Speaker 5: in the bank, or how good you are with it. 729 00:31:25,240 --> 00:31:27,520 Speaker 2: It's actually who you are as a human being. 730 00:31:27,560 --> 00:31:30,840 Speaker 5: And I think so often we tie our self worth 731 00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:33,480 Speaker 5: to our net worth, yes, and that makes no sense. 732 00:31:33,920 --> 00:31:35,560 Speaker 5: Like have you ever looked at someone and be like, 733 00:31:36,120 --> 00:31:39,200 Speaker 5: they earn fifty thousand dollars. 734 00:31:39,160 --> 00:31:41,800 Speaker 4: They look like they've got fifteen k in the bank. 735 00:31:42,040 --> 00:31:44,240 Speaker 4: I want to be their friends? Yeah, no one does that. 736 00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:46,760 Speaker 5: Right, Like, I want to be friends with you because 737 00:31:46,760 --> 00:31:48,680 Speaker 5: you're cool, and you're kind, and you're nice, you're kind 738 00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:49,120 Speaker 5: of funny. 739 00:31:49,280 --> 00:31:52,120 Speaker 2: Like totally, that's what I want to surround myself with. 740 00:31:52,280 --> 00:31:55,200 Speaker 5: And I think that if you're in financial trouble, it 741 00:31:55,280 --> 00:31:57,040 Speaker 5: is so easy to bury your head in the sands 742 00:31:57,080 --> 00:32:00,080 Speaker 5: because you feel like it's a reflection of you, and 743 00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:03,440 Speaker 5: it's not. It's just a situation you've found yourself in, Like, 744 00:32:03,520 --> 00:32:06,880 Speaker 5: you're not debt, you're just someone experiencing it and you 745 00:32:06,920 --> 00:32:10,120 Speaker 5: can get out of it. That's cool, Like, let's work 746 00:32:10,160 --> 00:32:13,160 Speaker 5: on that. So speak to your banks, consolidate your debts. 747 00:32:13,320 --> 00:32:15,920 Speaker 5: Call the National Debt Helpline, who we talk about all 748 00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:18,080 Speaker 5: the time and we adore. But I think it's just 749 00:32:18,520 --> 00:32:21,040 Speaker 5: it's so important to remember that is not a reflection 750 00:32:21,120 --> 00:32:24,120 Speaker 5: of who you are, and Beck, this has been you before. 751 00:32:24,960 --> 00:32:26,760 Speaker 5: Would you recommend reaching out for help? 752 00:32:27,360 --> 00:32:30,200 Speaker 4: Yeah, definitely, And it's like a good thing to remember 753 00:32:30,240 --> 00:32:32,560 Speaker 4: that the person you're speaking to, the people that you're 754 00:32:32,600 --> 00:32:36,200 Speaker 4: reaching out to, have probably seen this before, if not 755 00:32:36,680 --> 00:32:41,440 Speaker 4: worse situations. It's just whatever, isn't it. It's just money. 756 00:32:41,600 --> 00:32:42,960 Speaker 4: At the end of the day. It's so easy to 757 00:32:43,280 --> 00:32:45,680 Speaker 4: get into debt, so easy to get out of debt. 758 00:32:45,640 --> 00:32:47,000 Speaker 4: It's not so easy to get out of debt. But 759 00:32:47,520 --> 00:32:50,440 Speaker 4: it's easy to start making a change exactly. 760 00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:52,280 Speaker 5: And I think that you raise a really good point. 761 00:32:52,320 --> 00:32:54,440 Speaker 5: I think sometimes when we're like, oh my god, I 762 00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:56,480 Speaker 5: have to call the National Debt Helpline. No, I'm not 763 00:32:56,480 --> 00:32:59,120 Speaker 5: picking up the phone like most of those people work 764 00:32:59,120 --> 00:33:01,800 Speaker 5: at the National Debt Hopeline because they've been impacted by 765 00:33:01,800 --> 00:33:04,880 Speaker 5: that before, so they get it properly. You're not calling 766 00:33:04,880 --> 00:33:06,800 Speaker 5: a CEO of the bank and being like, Hi, you're 767 00:33:06,800 --> 00:33:10,360 Speaker 5: a millionaire, and like I just don't understand. You're calling 768 00:33:10,360 --> 00:33:12,920 Speaker 5: someone who's wildly passionate about getting people out of debt. 769 00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:15,720 Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly, let them do away, let them help you. 770 00:33:15,800 --> 00:33:18,080 Speaker 4: But any last points to end the show. 771 00:33:18,120 --> 00:33:22,040 Speaker 5: I guess something else and is the stereotypical victoria divine quota. 772 00:33:22,040 --> 00:33:23,320 Speaker 2: It's just babes. 773 00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:25,840 Speaker 5: You do you like, there is nobody quite like you, 774 00:33:26,240 --> 00:33:28,680 Speaker 5: with your background and your experience and your hopes and 775 00:33:28,720 --> 00:33:31,520 Speaker 5: your dreams. Just have a think back about our Monday episodes, 776 00:33:31,680 --> 00:33:34,280 Speaker 5: Like everyone is so different and that's what. 777 00:33:34,240 --> 00:33:35,480 Speaker 2: Makes it so beautiful. 778 00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:38,240 Speaker 5: Like if we're all cookie cutter in the same like 779 00:33:38,760 --> 00:33:41,040 Speaker 5: I'm not going to learn from your experience, Like our 780 00:33:41,080 --> 00:33:42,960 Speaker 5: Money direst section of the podcast. 781 00:33:43,040 --> 00:33:44,520 Speaker 2: I'm sorry today's episode. 782 00:33:44,680 --> 00:33:47,959 Speaker 5: That's my favorite because you get to know people on 783 00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:52,480 Speaker 5: this deep level and they share their experiences so that 784 00:33:52,520 --> 00:33:56,680 Speaker 5: we can be richer for it physically and like mentally. 785 00:33:57,560 --> 00:34:01,360 Speaker 5: But I think really understanding that your journey is uniquely yours. 786 00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:03,320 Speaker 2: And it doesn't matter what the heck anybody else is doing. 787 00:34:03,640 --> 00:34:07,080 Speaker 2: Completely agree. There's something really sexy about somebody who just 788 00:34:07,320 --> 00:34:08,120 Speaker 2: knows who they are. 789 00:34:08,400 --> 00:34:08,760 Speaker 4: Yeah. 790 00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:10,480 Speaker 2: If they're like I don't need that, you go, wow, 791 00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:11,640 Speaker 2: I wish I had that conviction. 792 00:34:12,520 --> 00:34:14,640 Speaker 4: Yeah, I completely agree. I aspire to be like that. 793 00:34:14,640 --> 00:34:16,640 Speaker 4: That's the only comparison I'll be doing today. But I 794 00:34:16,680 --> 00:34:18,000 Speaker 4: think this is a really good place to leave it 795 00:34:18,000 --> 00:34:20,040 Speaker 4: for now. Let's go have a little tea. 796 00:34:20,480 --> 00:34:21,319 Speaker 2: I love a little tea. 797 00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:23,440 Speaker 5: Sit in the grass, Sit in the grass. Teach me 798 00:34:23,480 --> 00:34:25,960 Speaker 5: how to meditate, Yes, if I can do that, but 799 00:34:26,040 --> 00:34:27,240 Speaker 5: like I'm willing to try. 800 00:34:27,520 --> 00:34:30,240 Speaker 4: Everyone can have a good week. 801 00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:32,200 Speaker 2: Guys. We will see you on Friday. 802 00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:33,839 Speaker 4: Bye, guys. 803 00:34:40,280 --> 00:34:42,800 Speaker 6: The advice shared on She's on the Money is general 804 00:34:42,880 --> 00:34:46,720 Speaker 6: in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's 805 00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:50,240 Speaker 6: on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should 806 00:34:50,239 --> 00:34:53,440 Speaker 6: not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. 807 00:34:53,800 --> 00:34:56,279 Speaker 6: If you do choose to buy a financial product, read 808 00:34:56,280 --> 00:34:59,560 Speaker 6: the PDS TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice. 809 00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:01,000 Speaker 2: Taylor towards your needs. 810 00:35:01,360 --> 00:35:05,280 Speaker 6: Victoria Divine and She's on the Money are authorized representatives 811 00:35:05,320 --> 00:35:07,799 Speaker 6: of Money sherper P T Y L T D A 812 00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:10,719 Speaker 6: B N three two one six four nine two seven 813 00:35:10,840 --> 00:35:13,680 Speaker 6: seven zero eight A F s L four five one 814 00:35:13,880 --> 00:35:17,120 Speaker 6: two eight nine