1 00:00:05,760 --> 00:00:09,320 Speaker 1: There is one day each month that can change your relationship, 2 00:00:09,440 --> 00:00:13,600 Speaker 1: change your family, change almost everything for your child. We're 3 00:00:13,640 --> 00:00:15,600 Speaker 1: going to tell you about that in just a sec. 4 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:20,680 Speaker 1: Stay with us. Hello and welcome to The Happy Family's podcast, 5 00:00:21,120 --> 00:00:25,040 Speaker 1: Real Parenting Solutions. Every day on Australia's most downloaded parenting podcast, 6 00:00:25,120 --> 00:00:28,520 Speaker 1: we are Justin and Kylie Courson and every Friday we 7 00:00:28,640 --> 00:00:30,560 Speaker 1: get I was going to say down and dirty, but 8 00:00:30,560 --> 00:00:32,639 Speaker 1: that's not really what this podcast is about. We get 9 00:00:32,640 --> 00:00:37,920 Speaker 1: it into the details, the nitty gretaya. I'm so funny 10 00:00:37,920 --> 00:00:41,520 Speaker 1: that I made you snort? Was that a snort? Maybe 11 00:00:42,920 --> 00:00:45,080 Speaker 1: we get into the detail of how our family is going, 12 00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:46,600 Speaker 1: what we're doing right, what we're doing wrong, how we 13 00:00:46,600 --> 00:00:51,640 Speaker 1: can do things better, and we introspect because we want 14 00:00:51,640 --> 00:00:54,880 Speaker 1: to be intentional parents. Today. I'm going to go first 15 00:00:55,080 --> 00:00:58,920 Speaker 1: because my one is really, really, really short. Over the 16 00:00:58,960 --> 00:01:01,240 Speaker 1: course of this past week, I've been doing a lot 17 00:01:01,240 --> 00:01:04,880 Speaker 1: of staff development seminars and sessions professional development for teachers. 18 00:01:05,280 --> 00:01:08,000 Speaker 1: This last week being away, it's reminded me of how 19 00:01:08,080 --> 00:01:10,880 Speaker 1: bad hotel pillows are, no matter what hotel you're staying at, 20 00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:13,039 Speaker 1: and it's reminded me of how much I missed my 21 00:01:13,080 --> 00:01:15,520 Speaker 1: family when I travel. It's the hardest part of my job. 22 00:01:15,600 --> 00:01:17,400 Speaker 1: The best part is making a difference in people's lives, 23 00:01:17,440 --> 00:01:19,959 Speaker 1: but the hardest part, without question, is being away from 24 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:23,520 Speaker 1: you and the kids on whatever day. It was a 25 00:01:23,600 --> 00:01:25,400 Speaker 1: couple of days ago I got back from having been 26 00:01:25,440 --> 00:01:28,840 Speaker 1: away for two nights, and when I got home, I 27 00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:33,399 Speaker 1: walked into the kitchen to find you having made a delicious, healthy, 28 00:01:34,160 --> 00:01:38,400 Speaker 1: gluten free bananaca cake, and our two teenage daughters, and 29 00:01:38,440 --> 00:01:42,240 Speaker 1: they were just delighting in one another. They were laughing, 30 00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:45,240 Speaker 1: they were telling stories, they were Do you ever remember 31 00:01:45,280 --> 00:01:48,160 Speaker 1: what they were talking about. I mean, it was just stuff, right, 32 00:01:48,600 --> 00:01:52,040 Speaker 1: just teenage girls being fun, teenage girls, two sisters having 33 00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:52,520 Speaker 1: a laugh. 34 00:01:53,120 --> 00:01:54,920 Speaker 2: Well, the fact that one of them had been away 35 00:01:54,960 --> 00:02:00,200 Speaker 2: for nearly two weeks made the reunion delightful. 36 00:02:00,080 --> 00:02:02,680 Speaker 1: Having a really great catch up. But the thing is, 37 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:04,800 Speaker 1: I had a really big headache because I hadn't slept 38 00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:06,880 Speaker 1: because of a bad pillow in a hotel room. But 39 00:02:07,520 --> 00:02:10,720 Speaker 1: walking in and hearing these two girls catching up and 40 00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:14,359 Speaker 1: spending time together and laughing their heads off, I don't 41 00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,760 Speaker 1: know what's happening to me. I guess I've kind of 42 00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:18,600 Speaker 1: always done this. We do it all the way through 43 00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:21,360 Speaker 1: but at the moment, there's something happening where I feel 44 00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:25,639 Speaker 1: like these experiences are richer than they've ever been. We're 45 00:02:25,680 --> 00:02:28,040 Speaker 1: dealing with daughters four and five in their teens now 46 00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:30,720 Speaker 1: only daughter to number six is still to hit hers, 47 00:02:31,440 --> 00:02:35,080 Speaker 1: and there's something about it. I just I want to 48 00:02:35,080 --> 00:02:37,440 Speaker 1: reach out and capture the moment. I don't want the 49 00:02:37,480 --> 00:02:40,600 Speaker 1: moment to disappear. It almost brings me to tears. As 50 00:02:40,639 --> 00:02:43,440 Speaker 1: I stood in the kitchen and spread butter, probably too 51 00:02:43,520 --> 00:02:46,160 Speaker 1: much butter on my healthy, gluten free banana cake that 52 00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:48,760 Speaker 1: you had made, and listen to the girls, I thought, 53 00:02:49,400 --> 00:02:53,080 Speaker 1: I want this moment to last forever. This is heaven. 54 00:02:54,480 --> 00:02:57,480 Speaker 1: My old do better tomorrow is how can we have 55 00:02:58,360 --> 00:03:01,440 Speaker 1: number one more of those moments then number two? How 56 00:03:01,440 --> 00:03:05,360 Speaker 1: can we be in those moments and inhaled them. How 57 00:03:05,360 --> 00:03:07,680 Speaker 1: can we absorb them? How can we emblaze them on 58 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:09,720 Speaker 1: our memories? And I think the only way that you 59 00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:14,240 Speaker 1: can do it is to be absolutely present. I wasn't 60 00:03:14,240 --> 00:03:16,200 Speaker 1: interested in checking my emails, even though I hadn't looked 61 00:03:16,200 --> 00:03:18,120 Speaker 1: at them all day. Didn't really care if I had 62 00:03:18,120 --> 00:03:19,720 Speaker 1: any social media notifications. 63 00:03:19,919 --> 00:03:23,160 Speaker 2: The fact that you had delicious banana bread in your hands, 64 00:03:23,320 --> 00:03:26,400 Speaker 2: it may have sweetened the moment it just. 65 00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:28,760 Speaker 1: Said to me. It did certainly keep me really present 66 00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:34,080 Speaker 1: and right there, but it was just this, I mean intention, mindfulness. 67 00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:35,840 Speaker 1: I want to do a quick experiment with you. You 68 00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:38,280 Speaker 1: might have done this with me before, and if you have, 69 00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:42,320 Speaker 1: then try not to try not to ruin it. I 70 00:03:42,360 --> 00:03:44,040 Speaker 1: want to do some quick maths with you. What's a 71 00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:45,480 Speaker 1: thousand plus forty. 72 00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:49,840 Speaker 2: One thousand and forty plus one thousand, two thousand and 73 00:03:49,880 --> 00:03:54,240 Speaker 2: forty plus thirty two thousand and seventy plus one thousand, 74 00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:58,880 Speaker 2: three thousand and seventy plus twenty three thousand and nineteen 75 00:03:58,960 --> 00:04:04,320 Speaker 2: plus one thousand, four thousand and ninety plus ten four 76 00:04:04,440 --> 00:04:08,120 Speaker 2: thousand and one hundred. 77 00:04:08,440 --> 00:04:09,920 Speaker 1: I think I've done this with you before. You were 78 00:04:09,920 --> 00:04:12,120 Speaker 1: paying too much attention. You knew what was coming. But 79 00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:12,760 Speaker 1: I'm going to know. 80 00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:14,480 Speaker 2: I'm not good at math so I needed to make 81 00:04:14,520 --> 00:04:16,040 Speaker 2: sure I wasn't going to make a fool of myself. 82 00:04:16,080 --> 00:04:17,640 Speaker 2: You've got the record, but none. 83 00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:20,000 Speaker 1: Well, I guess there's two things here. First, first thing, 84 00:04:20,120 --> 00:04:22,440 Speaker 1: you're saying you're not good at maths, so therefore you 85 00:04:22,520 --> 00:04:26,680 Speaker 1: had to pay attention on the same day that I 86 00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:30,080 Speaker 1: had this beautiful interaction with our daughters. I ran that 87 00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:35,880 Speaker 1: puzzle by a room of educators, probably one hundred school 88 00:04:35,920 --> 00:04:38,839 Speaker 1: teachers are sitting in the room, and the opening exercise, 89 00:04:38,920 --> 00:04:42,600 Speaker 1: the opening conversation piece for my keynote presentation for them 90 00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:45,159 Speaker 1: was let's do some simple maths and wake up your brain. 91 00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:47,400 Speaker 1: And when you get to four thousand and nine and 92 00:04:47,440 --> 00:04:50,520 Speaker 1: I say plus ten, the whole room and I've done 93 00:04:50,560 --> 00:04:53,160 Speaker 1: this with hundreds, No, I've done this with thousands of 94 00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:55,040 Speaker 1: people over the years. The whole room and maybe whoever's 95 00:04:55,040 --> 00:04:57,560 Speaker 1: listening to the podcast felt the same way. Everyone just 96 00:04:57,560 --> 00:05:01,640 Speaker 1: says five thousand. They go their mind lessly because you're 97 00:05:01,640 --> 00:05:04,200 Speaker 1: not good at maths. You are trying really hard to 98 00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 1: be in the moment. Quite often they're in the room 99 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:08,400 Speaker 1: and they're not so much in the moment, they're just 100 00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:11,920 Speaker 1: sort of on autopilot. And really, my take home messages 101 00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:15,880 Speaker 1: when it comes to our kids, we can't be on autopilot, 102 00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:17,400 Speaker 1: or maybe a better term for it would be we 103 00:05:17,440 --> 00:05:20,719 Speaker 1: can't be on auto parent. We need to be there 104 00:05:20,839 --> 00:05:23,680 Speaker 1: in the moment with them, paying attention. When we do it, 105 00:05:24,120 --> 00:05:28,920 Speaker 1: the moments are just so much richer. That's my I'll 106 00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:31,400 Speaker 1: do better tomorrow, be in the moment soak it up 107 00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:36,200 Speaker 1: because one day they're not going to be three, or seven, 108 00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:48,880 Speaker 1: or eleven or fourteen and seventeen. Again, Kylie, what's your 109 00:05:48,920 --> 00:05:51,040 Speaker 1: I'll do better tomorrow? We've teased it at the top 110 00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:55,520 Speaker 1: of the podcast. There's one day each month that will 111 00:05:55,560 --> 00:05:57,680 Speaker 1: make a bigger difference in your family's life and your 112 00:05:57,720 --> 00:05:59,120 Speaker 1: kid's life than just about anything else. 113 00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:04,000 Speaker 2: And beautifully from your message in that you have to 114 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:07,480 Speaker 2: be intentional. I would love to attribute this to. 115 00:06:08,839 --> 00:06:11,440 Speaker 1: Our genius and prowess and brilliance as parents. 116 00:06:11,360 --> 00:06:13,919 Speaker 2: But this actually has to go to one of our listeners, 117 00:06:13,920 --> 00:06:15,960 Speaker 2: and I wish that I had taken note of their 118 00:06:16,040 --> 00:06:19,440 Speaker 2: name when I read their comment because it has stuck 119 00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:23,440 Speaker 2: with me. But they suggested that one of the things 120 00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:27,559 Speaker 2: they do in their home is they have a date 121 00:06:28,000 --> 00:06:32,000 Speaker 2: night with each of their children on the birth date 122 00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:33,200 Speaker 2: of each of them. 123 00:06:33,400 --> 00:06:35,000 Speaker 1: Right, So basically, if your child is born on the 124 00:06:35,080 --> 00:06:40,680 Speaker 1: second of May, every month January through December, on the second, 125 00:06:40,880 --> 00:06:43,360 Speaker 1: you have a date night or an outing of some kind. 126 00:06:43,360 --> 00:06:45,599 Speaker 1: Maybe it's a brecky, but you go and do something 127 00:06:45,640 --> 00:06:48,799 Speaker 1: to celebrate their birth day each month. 128 00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:51,720 Speaker 2: So it's not about celebrating their birthday, it's actually about 129 00:06:51,720 --> 00:06:54,000 Speaker 2: being intentional about making time. 130 00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:55,200 Speaker 1: Together break clariticase. 131 00:06:55,360 --> 00:06:59,880 Speaker 2: So I attempted to do it last year with moderate success. 132 00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:03,599 Speaker 2: It's a little bit tricky. There's six of them, and 133 00:07:03,720 --> 00:07:06,120 Speaker 2: our lives were very, very busy last year. 134 00:07:06,200 --> 00:07:07,960 Speaker 1: That is a lot of date nights or date days, 135 00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:10,440 Speaker 1: or mornings out or whatever. It's a lot. 136 00:07:10,600 --> 00:07:12,720 Speaker 2: But at the beginning of the year I recommitted that 137 00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:15,600 Speaker 2: this was something I really wanted to try. I sat 138 00:07:15,640 --> 00:07:18,160 Speaker 2: down and looked at my calendar. I actually marked out 139 00:07:18,160 --> 00:07:21,760 Speaker 2: the days that I would be required, and then I 140 00:07:21,920 --> 00:07:26,520 Speaker 2: worked out exactly what would make a meaningful experience for 141 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:29,240 Speaker 2: each of our children. If we leave it to chance, 142 00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:31,840 Speaker 2: if we leave it to the last minute, we're going 143 00:07:31,880 --> 00:07:35,200 Speaker 2: to have a substandard experience. But if we are actually 144 00:07:35,280 --> 00:07:38,480 Speaker 2: really intentional, do you know what, this is something that 145 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,960 Speaker 2: either my child's been dying to do forever and we 146 00:07:41,040 --> 00:07:43,440 Speaker 2: just have never got around to it, or this is 147 00:07:43,440 --> 00:07:46,040 Speaker 2: something that's going to light my child up. You are 148 00:07:46,080 --> 00:07:49,920 Speaker 2: going to build memories with your children in ways that 149 00:07:49,960 --> 00:07:53,280 Speaker 2: you won't otherwise do so because you are willing to 150 00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:55,720 Speaker 2: be so in the moment with them. 151 00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:58,440 Speaker 1: There's a podcast that I really like listening to who 152 00:07:58,760 --> 00:08:02,640 Speaker 1: says something along the lines of the definition of love 153 00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:06,280 Speaker 1: is bearing witness to one another's lives, and I love 154 00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:08,880 Speaker 1: that idea. It's about to get this, you have to 155 00:08:08,920 --> 00:08:11,760 Speaker 1: be together. You have to be considered and affectionate towards 156 00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:14,760 Speaker 1: one another and watch and participate and spend time in 157 00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:17,160 Speaker 1: one another's lives. That's how you show that you love them. 158 00:08:17,480 --> 00:08:20,600 Speaker 2: So the other day I took one of our girls 159 00:08:20,640 --> 00:08:23,800 Speaker 2: out for an early morning walk. She doesn't love getting 160 00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:25,680 Speaker 2: up too early, so this was a little. 161 00:08:25,440 --> 00:08:27,520 Speaker 1: Bit of a stretch for the statement of the month. 162 00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:30,280 Speaker 2: But I did sweeten the deal with an Assaiah bowl. 163 00:08:30,880 --> 00:08:33,720 Speaker 2: I don't know whoever came up with the idea or concept, 164 00:08:33,800 --> 00:08:36,040 Speaker 2: but to me, it is sunshine in a cup and 165 00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:37,959 Speaker 2: it is the best way to start a day. 166 00:08:38,120 --> 00:08:40,160 Speaker 1: I love that. I can't stand this stuff. I don't 167 00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:41,920 Speaker 1: know how you eat it. You've you've tried to force 168 00:08:41,960 --> 00:08:43,760 Speaker 1: feed it to me, and every time it's just like wow. 169 00:08:43,800 --> 00:08:45,840 Speaker 1: That is so especially. 170 00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:48,000 Speaker 2: When you put some payin nuts in there and you've 171 00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:50,199 Speaker 2: got the crunch and the sweet. Oh, it's just a 172 00:08:50,200 --> 00:08:53,880 Speaker 2: awesome I love it, but so does she, so she 173 00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:55,920 Speaker 2: doesn't want to pay for it though. So going on 174 00:08:55,960 --> 00:08:56,880 Speaker 2: a little date, have. 175 00:08:56,880 --> 00:08:58,400 Speaker 1: You noticed that none of our kids want to pay 176 00:08:58,400 --> 00:09:00,600 Speaker 1: for anything. It's always on us all the time. I 177 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:02,320 Speaker 1: wonder if we were like that with our parents. Think so. 178 00:09:03,760 --> 00:09:06,280 Speaker 2: But part of the sunshine in a cup is being 179 00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:08,960 Speaker 2: able to sit down on the water's edge and to 180 00:09:09,320 --> 00:09:13,960 Speaker 2: just soak in the sun's rays and just that beautiful 181 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:18,080 Speaker 2: positive energy from the ocean and lap it up. And 182 00:09:18,120 --> 00:09:21,480 Speaker 2: what's beautiful about that is sitting side by side and 183 00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:26,960 Speaker 2: being in that beautiful setting. Conversations that would not happen 184 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:31,320 Speaker 2: any other way start to flow. And as I listened 185 00:09:31,320 --> 00:09:33,840 Speaker 2: to her share the things that she was really excited about, 186 00:09:33,960 --> 00:09:38,160 Speaker 2: I was blowing away how much growth has taken place, 187 00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:40,040 Speaker 2: even in the last six months. 188 00:09:40,400 --> 00:09:42,720 Speaker 1: Tangent on this, and it's a really important tangent for 189 00:09:42,760 --> 00:09:45,080 Speaker 1: any parent who has got a child who says, this 190 00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:46,120 Speaker 1: is what I want to do or this is the 191 00:09:46,160 --> 00:09:48,280 Speaker 1: path that I want to take. Some research that came 192 00:09:48,280 --> 00:09:50,760 Speaker 1: out some years ago from a researcher named Laura King. 193 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:53,360 Speaker 1: She looked at this concept known as the best Possible 194 00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:56,679 Speaker 1: Future Self. Essentially, what it is is it's a projecting 195 00:09:56,679 --> 00:09:58,959 Speaker 1: yourself into the future and imagining in five or ten 196 00:09:59,040 --> 00:10:00,800 Speaker 1: years all the things that you want to have happened 197 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:02,800 Speaker 1: having happened, so that you can see not just the 198 00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:04,400 Speaker 1: kind of life you're living, but the kind of person 199 00:10:04,400 --> 00:10:06,880 Speaker 1: you've become. It's really much more about character than career 200 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:12,360 Speaker 1: and finances and aspiration. But what's fascinating about her research 201 00:10:12,600 --> 00:10:15,360 Speaker 1: is I can't remember it was her or some career researchers. 202 00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:17,959 Speaker 1: They took on this idea and said, well, that's great 203 00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:19,640 Speaker 1: if you've got a clear idea of what you want 204 00:10:19,679 --> 00:10:23,320 Speaker 1: to do, but there's potentially a whole lot of different 205 00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:26,600 Speaker 1: best possible future selves. What they found was when they 206 00:10:26,640 --> 00:10:29,040 Speaker 1: got people to do this experiment where they would imagine 207 00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:31,199 Speaker 1: themselves doing the thing that they dreamed of, but also 208 00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:33,400 Speaker 1: doing one or two other things that they hadn't really 209 00:10:33,480 --> 00:10:35,440 Speaker 1: dreamed of, but they might really like to do or 210 00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:37,600 Speaker 1: really like to try, things that are completely different to 211 00:10:37,760 --> 00:10:42,440 Speaker 1: their dream career or dream goal. They found that people 212 00:10:42,520 --> 00:10:44,959 Speaker 1: were much more balanced and much more relaxed about the future, 213 00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:46,920 Speaker 1: and their well being was higher, and their life satisfaction 214 00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:52,320 Speaker 1: was higher because they weren't so boldly completely wedded to 215 00:10:52,440 --> 00:10:56,520 Speaker 1: this one true path. What they started to understand was, 216 00:10:56,559 --> 00:10:58,600 Speaker 1: I can take the pressure off a bit because there 217 00:10:58,600 --> 00:11:00,719 Speaker 1: are a multitude of different things that I could do 218 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:03,199 Speaker 1: that could still help me to be who I wanted 219 00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:05,679 Speaker 1: to be, develop how I wanted to develop, and make 220 00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:07,480 Speaker 1: a difference in the way that I'd like to do it. 221 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:11,160 Speaker 1: So when I hear you tell that story, that sparks 222 00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:15,800 Speaker 1: joy and satisfaction and optimism for me because it makes 223 00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:19,959 Speaker 1: me think our daughter was initially rigidly fixed to a 224 00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:23,880 Speaker 1: specific career path, and now she's going there's any number 225 00:11:23,920 --> 00:11:25,640 Speaker 1: of options that might be suitable for me. 226 00:11:26,080 --> 00:11:28,000 Speaker 2: We were also able to talk about the things that 227 00:11:28,040 --> 00:11:30,640 Speaker 2: she was anxious about, the things that were worrying her 228 00:11:30,679 --> 00:11:32,560 Speaker 2: at the moment, the things that she was fearful of, 229 00:11:33,120 --> 00:11:38,120 Speaker 2: and just being able to sit there in again, without 230 00:11:38,920 --> 00:11:42,760 Speaker 2: the agenda, without the stress of everybody else in the 231 00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:47,040 Speaker 2: house moving and getting on with things. That intentional time 232 00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:51,240 Speaker 2: that's taken away from everything else meant that we could 233 00:11:51,280 --> 00:11:55,559 Speaker 2: sit there and I could actually listen here, offer support 234 00:11:55,920 --> 00:11:58,640 Speaker 2: and we could work through those challenges. You know, the 235 00:11:58,640 --> 00:12:01,040 Speaker 2: best thing to say to you kid when they're struggling 236 00:12:01,080 --> 00:12:04,760 Speaker 2: like that, what's the worst thing that could happen if 237 00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:08,280 Speaker 2: that happens. What's going to happen if you fail that class? 238 00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:12,160 Speaker 2: What's the worst thing is someone going to die? Is 239 00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:13,720 Speaker 2: it going to you know, like, is the world going 240 00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:16,240 Speaker 2: to erupt? No, You're going to have to do another class. 241 00:12:16,280 --> 00:12:18,960 Speaker 2: It's not the end of the world. Your teacher might 242 00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:21,560 Speaker 2: be able to give you an extension assignment, or you know, 243 00:12:21,600 --> 00:12:24,360 Speaker 2: like there's so many other possibilities, but they always we 244 00:12:25,040 --> 00:12:28,199 Speaker 2: human nature, we go to the worst possible case scenario. 245 00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:31,959 Speaker 2: So it's just it was just a really lovely, lovely 246 00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:35,880 Speaker 2: opportunity to have that moment, and I want more of them. 247 00:12:36,120 --> 00:12:38,400 Speaker 1: So to take our message for your old do better tomorrow. 248 00:12:38,880 --> 00:12:42,880 Speaker 2: Be intentional about finding moments that you can spend with 249 00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:45,680 Speaker 2: your child. It might be the structure that we've been 250 00:12:45,880 --> 00:12:49,120 Speaker 2: shared by one of our wonderful listeners if you're out there, 251 00:12:49,840 --> 00:12:51,840 Speaker 2: but it might be another way. You might do it 252 00:12:51,880 --> 00:12:54,320 Speaker 2: each weekend, or it might be a Sunday thing, whatever, 253 00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:57,960 Speaker 2: whatever works for your family. It is about making time 254 00:12:58,120 --> 00:12:58,800 Speaker 2: for each of your. 255 00:12:58,720 --> 00:13:01,640 Speaker 1: Children, one on one love A spelled T. I M 256 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:04,120 Speaker 1: to our kids. We really hope that there's some helpful 257 00:13:04,160 --> 00:13:08,400 Speaker 1: take my message and inspiration from our older better tomorrow, 258 00:13:08,559 --> 00:13:11,400 Speaker 1: have a great weekend. The Happy Families podcast is produced 259 00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:14,640 Speaker 1: by Justin Roland. For more information and resources that will 260 00:13:14,640 --> 00:13:16,760 Speaker 1: make your family happier. We'd love for you to visit 261 00:13:16,800 --> 00:13:18,840 Speaker 1: us at happy families dot com dot au