WEBVTT - Ask Uncut - Got milk? Or got the ick? 0:00:00.880 --> 0:00:05.280 Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout 0:00:05.320 --> 0:00:09.080 Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We 0:00:09.160 --> 0:00:11.920 pay our respect to their elders past and present and 0:00:12.039 --> 0:00:15.360 extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander 0:00:15.360 --> 0:00:16.120 peoples today. 0:00:16.320 --> 0:00:19.599 This episode is recorded on Gadigal Land of the Aurora Nation. 0:00:39.120 --> 0:00:42.640 Hey guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. 0:00:42.680 --> 0:00:44.879 I'm Brittany and I'm Laura. 0:00:44.640 --> 0:00:48.200 And this is our Thursday episode, Ask Uncut episode where 0:00:48.240 --> 0:00:50.760 we answer, well you deep, your dark and your burning questions. 0:00:50.880 --> 0:00:54.000 Well, I want to start by giving a little update 0:00:54.080 --> 0:00:55.960 to something that's very important in my life. 0:00:56.240 --> 0:00:56.920 What's happened? 0:00:57.480 --> 0:00:59.520 Well, Delilah's got a period, still. 0:01:00.000 --> 0:01:03.480 Oldest, don't you It goes lowest, probably the same as 0:01:03.480 --> 0:01:03.880 a human. 0:01:05.080 --> 0:01:07.080 Is this really another update I've got. 0:01:07.200 --> 0:01:09.840 She's very hormonal at the moment, so she's sticking to 0:01:09.880 --> 0:01:12.119 me like glue. Anywhere I go, she goes. She has 0:01:12.160 --> 0:01:13.920 to be touching me at all times. She wants to 0:01:13.920 --> 0:01:15.959 be on me. I think she's got to saw tummy. 0:01:16.000 --> 0:01:18.600 So I did google something and you can get a 0:01:18.600 --> 0:01:20.360 heat pack for them. So I was like, I am 0:01:20.400 --> 0:01:23.160 going to give her a heat pack. Heat it up. 0:01:23.640 --> 0:01:25.040 She sat down on a bed, put it on. It, 0:01:25.280 --> 0:01:27.360 went away for two minutes, came back and it was 0:01:27.480 --> 0:01:28.520 ripped to shreds the heat. 0:01:30.880 --> 0:01:32.959 Considering the amount of headphones that we've gone through in 0:01:33.000 --> 0:01:36.160 this office, considering the amount of handbags you've gone through, 0:01:36.160 --> 0:01:38.880 shoes you've gone does any of that surprise you at all? 0:01:39.000 --> 0:01:41.640 But I guess I thought because she was feeling so poorly, 0:01:42.000 --> 0:01:42.840 I'm sure she was. 0:01:42.959 --> 0:01:44.280 Yeah, she will, I know they do. 0:01:44.319 --> 0:01:47.240 I googled it anyway, We've just googled it as we're speaking. 0:01:47.360 --> 0:01:50.880 I can last up to a month period. The dog's period, 0:01:51.040 --> 0:01:52.920 two to four weeks is what googled. 0:01:52.920 --> 0:01:55.240 Do you know what's lasted too long? Us talking about 0:01:55.280 --> 0:01:58.440 your dog's period? I hate episodes in a row. 0:01:58.600 --> 0:01:59.080 Do you know what? 0:01:59.440 --> 0:02:02.080 I had to go challenged Laura, you know what, why 0:02:02.080 --> 0:02:03.760 don't we talk about busters anal glands? 0:02:03.800 --> 0:02:05.400 That could be the next good chat for today? 0:02:05.520 --> 0:02:07.440 Well we have actually done that. I know about his 0:02:07.560 --> 0:02:09.000 You had to do anal gland? 0:02:09.160 --> 0:02:10.200 No, we are not. 0:02:10.280 --> 0:02:11.880 Okay, that's map date. We can move on. 0:02:11.960 --> 0:02:14.880 Do you know what we're going to talk about? There 0:02:15.000 --> 0:02:17.480 was a there was a little segment on the project. 0:02:17.480 --> 0:02:19.200 Now we're not just talking about the project because I've 0:02:19.200 --> 0:02:21.360 been on it. This is totally just coincidental. No, this 0:02:21.440 --> 0:02:24.120 is funny, really coincidental. There was a segment on the 0:02:24.120 --> 0:02:26.720 project and it was a woman speaking about how she 0:02:26.800 --> 0:02:28.600 got the ick. She went out on a date with 0:02:28.639 --> 0:02:32.080 a guy and on the date, the man ordered a 0:02:32.120 --> 0:02:33.239 glass of milk. 0:02:33.040 --> 0:02:35.320 With his dinner. It was a dinner date, so he 0:02:35.400 --> 0:02:36.920 ordered a glass of milk. This is a woman in 0:02:36.919 --> 0:02:39.560 the UK and she said she found it odd. She's like, 0:02:39.600 --> 0:02:42.240 I don't know why. I wish I knew why, but 0:02:42.280 --> 0:02:44.520 it gave her the ick. She can't work it out. 0:02:44.520 --> 0:02:47.359 There's something about a grown man sitting down on a 0:02:47.440 --> 0:02:50.840 romantic date ordering dinner. You've got, you've got your wine, 0:02:50.880 --> 0:02:53.480 and he orders I didn't even know if a restaurant, 0:02:53.600 --> 0:02:55.120 how do you even charge for that? I don't even 0:02:55.120 --> 0:02:55.960 think that's on the menu. 0:02:56.120 --> 0:02:57.640 Like imagine sitting there and being like, I'll get the 0:02:57.760 --> 0:02:59.600 yu steak please, and a glass of milk. 0:03:00.200 --> 0:03:01.679 What do you think about this? Oh? 0:03:01.720 --> 0:03:03.840 Like it's weird. Which is funny that it's weird because 0:03:03.960 --> 0:03:04.960 it is just a drink. 0:03:05.080 --> 0:03:08.040 Because you do I because we associate having a glass 0:03:08.040 --> 0:03:10.720 of milk with children. That's why it's a very emasculating 0:03:10.800 --> 0:03:13.160 drink for him to order it is funny. The thread 0:03:13.200 --> 0:03:13.600 was funny. 0:03:13.600 --> 0:03:15.720 So she actually, this woman actually put it out to 0:03:16.120 --> 0:03:18.120 the world and she's like, why do I think this 0:03:18.200 --> 0:03:18.600 is weird? 0:03:19.000 --> 0:03:19.560 Is this weird? 0:03:19.600 --> 0:03:19.880 Like? Am? 0:03:19.880 --> 0:03:20.360 I asked? 0:03:20.840 --> 0:03:23.000 Should I date someone that drinks milk? Some of the 0:03:23.040 --> 0:03:26.040 responses were pretty funny. But maybe he's got digestion problems, 0:03:26.080 --> 0:03:27.880 you know, maybe he's got an issue. You don't know, 0:03:27.919 --> 0:03:30.400 But I don't know if that is helping the ick 0:03:30.520 --> 0:03:33.720 situation that if you think your date has bow problems 0:03:33.720 --> 0:03:36.200 that are that extreme that he can only order milk 0:03:36.400 --> 0:03:38.040 at his dinner, do you know what? 0:03:38.120 --> 0:03:40.080 Okay, I know that we're making fun of this, but 0:03:40.160 --> 0:03:42.280 Matt loves a glass of milk. Would he order it 0:03:42.320 --> 0:03:43.760 on a date? Like would we go out for a 0:03:43.800 --> 0:03:46.080 lovely dinner to Icebergs and then him order a side 0:03:46.120 --> 0:03:48.800 of milk? No, but loves a glass of milk. And 0:03:48.840 --> 0:03:51.960 I find it a bit weird when adults drink a 0:03:52.000 --> 0:03:54.480 full glass of cold, full cream milk. The whole thing 0:03:54.560 --> 0:03:56.600 is strange to me. So, I mean I've got some 0:03:56.680 --> 0:03:58.520 reserve judgment. There is nothing. 0:03:58.960 --> 0:04:01.760 There's a few things that make me viscerally ill to 0:04:01.800 --> 0:04:02.200 look at. 0:04:02.480 --> 0:04:04.400 One of them is talking about your dogs period and 0:04:04.520 --> 0:04:04.880 love that. 0:04:05.040 --> 0:04:07.080 One of them is the smell I'm going to give 0:04:07.080 --> 0:04:08.360 you an insight into my life. One of them is 0:04:08.400 --> 0:04:13.040 a smell me using your bathroom before. Oh my god, 0:04:13.480 --> 0:04:15.240 Laura Burnerstrop the biggest bomb. 0:04:16.120 --> 0:04:17.720 We do not know to go into that. 0:04:18.120 --> 0:04:19.960 You brought it up. I was going to bypass that 0:04:20.240 --> 0:04:22.880 included Okay, I'm gonna have to tell you now we 0:04:22.920 --> 0:04:24.880 did it. I don't know how you look so attractive 0:04:24.920 --> 0:04:28.000 on the outside and your insight is rotting. Something is 0:04:28.120 --> 0:04:31.640 not right, something is the right. And then you walked 0:04:31.680 --> 0:04:33.680 in and you were like, I need to ship well. 0:04:33.720 --> 0:04:36.120 I said, sorry, I've been holding onto that for four hours. 0:04:36.120 --> 0:04:38.400 So then you came back into my room, Wakeisha and 0:04:38.440 --> 0:04:40.599 I want my bed, and this smell was on you 0:04:40.720 --> 0:04:43.359 and cave wafted into my room a Keisha and I 0:04:43.360 --> 0:04:46.000 were like, we need to get out of here. Bought mission. 0:04:46.040 --> 0:04:46.440 Do you know what? 0:04:46.480 --> 0:04:49.000 This just gives you, guys an insight into how close 0:04:49.080 --> 0:04:51.479 we are and how much we love each other. That 0:04:51.600 --> 0:04:54.200 I will reserve going to the toilet in public to 0:04:54.240 --> 0:04:55.480 do it at Britney's house. 0:04:56.080 --> 0:04:57.599 No, if you were real friends, you would do it 0:04:57.640 --> 0:04:58.440 in the public toils. 0:04:58.480 --> 0:05:00.520 So I would like to make it very clear. Your 0:05:00.600 --> 0:05:03.080 house is also where we work out it. This is 0:05:03.080 --> 0:05:05.960 my workplace. And that was on you because you wanted 0:05:05.960 --> 0:05:07.719 it to be here. I did not want this to 0:05:07.760 --> 0:05:09.679 be our work Okay, let's get back on track. 0:05:10.080 --> 0:05:12.560 What I was going to say, Besides your toilet smell, 0:05:13.440 --> 0:05:14.880 a few of the things in life that make me 0:05:14.920 --> 0:05:17.039 feel sick and I cannot be around. One of them 0:05:17.240 --> 0:05:21.400 is the smell of butter in a pan, melting or 0:05:21.720 --> 0:05:24.560 melting butter. I cannot look at it, I cannot smell it. 0:05:24.600 --> 0:05:26.240 I can't. You couldn't pay me to taste it. 0:05:26.480 --> 0:05:29.719 My children will eat the spoonful of butter like a 0:05:29.760 --> 0:05:32.080 teaspoon of butter, both of them. Every morning they are 0:05:32.080 --> 0:05:33.680 obsessed with it. They wake up in the first thing 0:05:33.720 --> 0:05:34.479 they say is butter. 0:05:34.800 --> 0:05:37.160 Oh. I would have to disown my child. I would 0:05:37.200 --> 0:05:38.920 do that. What do you do when you divorce your kid? 0:05:40.040 --> 0:05:40.919 You know what's it called? 0:05:41.480 --> 0:05:43.520 You know when you divorce your children? Yeah, well, it's 0:05:43.520 --> 0:05:47.120 when you're terrible co parents. Abandonment, which one is when 0:05:47.200 --> 0:05:50.640 children divorce their parents it's called emancipation, child emancipation, but 0:05:50.720 --> 0:05:52.080 usually it's a child that's like, I don't want you 0:05:52.120 --> 0:05:53.040 to be my parents anymore. 0:05:53.040 --> 0:05:54.080 But you know, if you. 0:05:54.000 --> 0:05:56.240 Want to emancipate yourself from your children, if they want 0:05:56.279 --> 0:05:57.600 to eat butter, is that too much? 0:05:58.080 --> 0:06:00.080 A little bit extreme, a bit extremety. 0:06:00.279 --> 0:06:02.480 Back on track. The smell of melting butter. Cannot do it. 0:06:02.520 --> 0:06:04.280 I hate that your kids just like gobble it up. 0:06:04.360 --> 0:06:06.120 I haven't eaten butter my entire life. The other one 0:06:06.160 --> 0:06:09.880 is the smell of cooking raw mince or meat. So 0:06:09.920 --> 0:06:12.039 when you put that mince that first once is cooked, 0:06:12.040 --> 0:06:13.880 it's okay, or it's got some seasoning. But when you 0:06:13.880 --> 0:06:17.039 put raw mince in like I cooked Alailah's mince in 0:06:17.120 --> 0:06:19.440 the air fryer, and I have to leave the room, 0:06:19.480 --> 0:06:22.000 I'm going to be ill. That's two of them. The 0:06:22.080 --> 0:06:26.320 third thing is watching someone or drinking myself a glass 0:06:26.320 --> 0:06:28.520 of milk. I cannot do it. I don't want to 0:06:28.520 --> 0:06:29.560 taste it. I don't want to look at it. I 0:06:29.560 --> 0:06:31.960 don't want to hear it. It's thick, it's creamy, it 0:06:32.040 --> 0:06:35.200 shouldn't be consumed on its own, and I want this 0:06:35.240 --> 0:06:36.919 is my thing, So for me, this woman. If I 0:06:36.920 --> 0:06:39.279 went on a date and he ordered a glass of milk. 0:06:39.520 --> 0:06:42.680 I know that you shouldn't be judgmental. I know that 0:06:42.680 --> 0:06:45.559 I shouldn't worry about their salmon shirt and their socks 0:06:45.640 --> 0:06:48.920 and sandals. But if they ordered a glass of milk, 0:06:48.960 --> 0:06:50.560 I think that would have to be me tapping out. 0:06:50.600 --> 0:06:52.920 Do you know what I've always wondered, who was the 0:06:52.960 --> 0:06:55.440 first person, like, who was the first person back in 0:06:55.440 --> 0:06:58.279 the date in caveman days that went, I'm gonna suck 0:06:58.320 --> 0:07:01.320 from that cow's titty. I canna sack they whatever comes 0:07:01.320 --> 0:07:03.160 out of that cow's titty, I'm going to drink it. 0:07:03.360 --> 0:07:05.800 And then over time it's just become so normal that 0:07:05.839 --> 0:07:07.080 we put it on our breakfast. 0:07:07.200 --> 0:07:10.680 You have to think, Actually, if you think about it, Laura, 0:07:10.720 --> 0:07:13.320 it's not that weird. I don't think someone was walking 0:07:13.360 --> 0:07:16.040 along saw an animal, saw the udder and thought I'm 0:07:16.040 --> 0:07:18.760 gonna suck it. They would have seen the baby calfs 0:07:18.800 --> 0:07:20.800 feeding off it. Okay, that's how they grow, and then 0:07:20.800 --> 0:07:23.200 they would have been like, Okay, it's famine. I'm hungry. 0:07:23.240 --> 0:07:26.320 I'm thirsty. That little cow's growing exponentially. I'm gonna suck 0:07:26.360 --> 0:07:26.600 on the. 0:07:26.520 --> 0:07:28.800 Ditty Okay, no, because that would make sense if it 0:07:28.840 --> 0:07:31.080 was just cows. But I'm sure all the cavemen people 0:07:31.120 --> 0:07:33.160 saw cats sucking on other cats too. There's so many 0:07:33.200 --> 0:07:35.280 other animals. Why was it just a cow? Why is 0:07:35.320 --> 0:07:37.360 it okay for us to drink cow milk and not 0:07:37.400 --> 0:07:38.560 okay to drink dog milk? 0:07:38.680 --> 0:07:40.640 Like there are scientific reasons, all right? 0:07:40.640 --> 0:07:42.440 Well, anyway, look, we wanted to take this to an 0:07:42.480 --> 0:07:44.800 even weirder place. We thought we would throw it out 0:07:44.840 --> 0:07:48.600 to our beautiful life on cut community, you lifers, and 0:07:48.680 --> 0:07:51.600 find out what is it the weirdest thing that somebody 0:07:51.600 --> 0:07:52.520 has ordered on a date. 0:07:52.640 --> 0:07:54.360 Well, I want to kick start by saying I actually 0:07:54.440 --> 0:07:56.760 dated someone that did this. I dated them for quite 0:07:56.800 --> 0:07:57.560 a long time. 0:07:57.360 --> 0:07:58.600 And they ordered milk every time. 0:07:59.080 --> 0:07:59.880 Milk shakes. 0:08:00.400 --> 0:08:01.120 Oh that's fine. 0:08:01.160 --> 0:08:03.400 The dinner though not, They didn't. It was it's the 0:08:03.440 --> 0:08:05.360 same vibe, right, you go to a really nice dinner. 0:08:05.400 --> 0:08:07.640 I would get the wine, but they would get a milkshake, 0:08:07.640 --> 0:08:10.480 a chocolate milkshake, strawbery milkshake, always milkshake. They didn't like alcohol, 0:08:10.680 --> 0:08:11.760 and I was like, why don't you just get like 0:08:11.760 --> 0:08:14.520 a lemon lm bitters or something. Always a milkshake. No, 0:08:14.520 --> 0:08:16.760 matter what time of day, no matter what meal, no 0:08:16.800 --> 0:08:19.880 matter what level of fancy restaurant. And it eventually got 0:08:19.880 --> 0:08:21.800 to the point where I was like, I don't don't 0:08:21.840 --> 0:08:22.320 know about it. 0:08:22.400 --> 0:08:23.960 It's funny you say that because the very first one 0:08:24.000 --> 0:08:25.920 I had from a life I was not that weird. 0:08:25.920 --> 0:08:27.440 But we went on a coffee date and he ordered 0:08:27.440 --> 0:08:29.160 a milkshake and it gave me the eck. 0:08:29.200 --> 0:08:31.800 Okay, that's what I reckon. That's okay. In the setting 0:08:31.840 --> 0:08:33.480 you're at a cafe, I reckon it was. 0:08:33.400 --> 0:08:34.000 The same guy. 0:08:34.679 --> 0:08:37.559 Nah, Okay. I went on a date with this one 0:08:37.600 --> 0:08:40.160 guy and he ordered klamari, but he also requested for 0:08:40.240 --> 0:08:42.280 the crumbs to be removed and then for it to 0:08:42.320 --> 0:08:43.680 be cut into small pieces. 0:08:44.240 --> 0:08:46.080 Cut your own calamaria. 0:08:46.120 --> 0:08:48.560 It was a first date, and he ordered one cocktail 0:08:48.840 --> 0:08:52.120 to share with two straws, and then he insisted that 0:08:52.160 --> 0:08:54.920 we link arms to drink it. I went on a 0:08:55.000 --> 0:08:57.559 date with a guy and he ordered Bailey's in orange 0:08:57.640 --> 0:09:00.400 juice and it curdled fun and rain. 0:09:00.520 --> 0:09:02.720 That's that is literally saying I want to mix milk 0:09:02.720 --> 0:09:04.480 and orange juice. That's what that is. That's my fancy. 0:09:04.600 --> 0:09:05.640 It's not made that up. 0:09:05.720 --> 0:09:07.160 He made that up and then I bet you he 0:09:07.200 --> 0:09:08.840 regretted it and then drank it anyway. 0:09:08.920 --> 0:09:10.839 I reckon, you just panic ordered and thought of a thing. 0:09:10.840 --> 0:09:11.040 You know. 0:09:11.040 --> 0:09:12.559 How the waitress comes and like what can I get you? 0:09:12.640 --> 0:09:16.200 And you're like, well, I'll have orange juice with Bayley's Like, 0:09:16.280 --> 0:09:17.679 he just panicked it. 0:09:17.760 --> 0:09:22.040 Okay, everything I ordered, he ordered the exact same thing, 0:09:22.480 --> 0:09:24.960 right down to my allergy requests and everything. 0:09:25.320 --> 0:09:27.280 That's a panic order too. It doesn't know, do you know? 0:09:27.440 --> 0:09:30.160 Okay, I'm going to interrupt this quickly though. What I 0:09:30.200 --> 0:09:32.760 do think on a date, how do we feel about sharing? 0:09:33.000 --> 0:09:34.640 Because I'm like, if I go on a date with 0:09:34.679 --> 0:09:37.320 a guy, perhaps not gonna happen again, but if I did, 0:09:37.480 --> 0:09:39.720 if I was to if I go for a dinner 0:09:39.800 --> 0:09:43.640 date and they don't want to share, it's an instant 0:09:43.720 --> 0:09:45.920 like whatever I'm getting, you're going to get something else 0:09:45.960 --> 0:09:47.880 different and we're gonna share it. If I go on 0:09:47.920 --> 0:09:49.640 a dinner date and I'm like, I'm going to get 0:09:49.679 --> 0:09:51.600 the fish and then they're like, oh, I'm also going 0:09:51.640 --> 0:09:53.400 to get the fish, and I'm like, so we're going 0:09:53.440 --> 0:09:54.760 to get two fishes and eat our own. 0:09:54.800 --> 0:09:57.120 That's dumb. I'm like, this is never gonna work. 0:09:57.200 --> 0:09:57.640 That's dumb. 0:09:57.760 --> 0:09:58.880 My relationship will never be. 0:09:59.080 --> 0:10:01.440 No, if I got a carbon which I always do fishing, 0:10:01.559 --> 0:10:03.880 carbarina ate chicken, if I get a carbonara and they 0:10:03.960 --> 0:10:05.320 ordered the same thing, I'd be like, that is the 0:10:05.360 --> 0:10:06.840 dumbest thing you've done today. 0:10:06.920 --> 0:10:09.360 But you just wasted the opportunity for us to eat everything. 0:10:09.400 --> 0:10:11.600 And the carbonara is a big like these are big servings. 0:10:11.640 --> 0:10:12.840 You want to share it around. 0:10:13.120 --> 0:10:15.400 Okay, all right, this one here is he asked for 0:10:15.520 --> 0:10:17.400 no onion in his meal and then said to the 0:10:17.440 --> 0:10:19.320 waitress in case I get a kiss at the end 0:10:19.360 --> 0:10:19.800 of the night. 0:10:19.960 --> 0:10:22.439 Okay, No, this isn't bad. But it's not bad that 0:10:22.480 --> 0:10:24.240 he did it. It's bad that he said it. So 0:10:24.280 --> 0:10:26.160 it's the assumption I knew that I was going on 0:10:26.200 --> 0:10:28.280 a date recently and we're getting takeaway. 0:10:28.400 --> 0:10:29.320 Put the sardines away. 0:10:29.480 --> 0:10:32.320 Yeah, I decided not to have the mackerel. No, I 0:10:32.520 --> 0:10:35.839 made a conscious decision not to get Oh, I just 0:10:35.880 --> 0:10:37.680 said it was actually I wanted the carbonara. I didn't 0:10:37.679 --> 0:10:39.079 get it because I was like garlic, and I think 0:10:39.080 --> 0:10:40.840 that's something you got to think about. You just don't 0:10:41.320 --> 0:10:42.000 voice it. 0:10:42.000 --> 0:10:43.920 It's really nice when you're in a long term relationship 0:10:43.920 --> 0:10:45.600 because you can eat anything. I can eat so much 0:10:45.640 --> 0:10:48.679 garlic that my entire body smells proper. Downsayss like garlic, 0:10:48.760 --> 0:10:50.400 and I'm like, whatever, it doesn't matter. 0:10:50.520 --> 0:10:52.439 You do it as like a blockage, like you don't 0:10:52.480 --> 0:10:54.560 come near me. I had the garlic. What about this one? 0:10:54.800 --> 0:10:57.560 A long black? He ordered a long black and said, oh, 0:10:57.720 --> 0:10:59.679 this is going to last me a week, and then 0:10:59.679 --> 0:11:01.559 took it home with him so that he could then 0:11:01.600 --> 0:11:04.360 take it to work. A long black. That's just a 0:11:04.360 --> 0:11:06.120 shot of coffee. How long is his coffee lasting? 0:11:06.160 --> 0:11:06.560 You wait? 0:11:06.600 --> 0:11:08.200 Like he's just putting like a couple of drops. He's 0:11:08.200 --> 0:11:10.080 got n drop. He's putting a couple drops of his 0:11:10.120 --> 0:11:10.839 milk every morning. 0:11:10.960 --> 0:11:12.920 No, you don't add milk he just ordered. 0:11:13.200 --> 0:11:14.719 But I mean it's lasting him a week, So I 0:11:14.720 --> 0:11:16.760 don't know what he istioning out throughout the week Monday 0:11:16.760 --> 0:11:17.240 to Friday. 0:11:17.760 --> 0:11:21.680 My partner puts mayonnaise on a steak so thick that 0:11:21.760 --> 0:11:23.480 you can't see the steak anymore. 0:11:23.640 --> 0:11:26.160 I'm fine with that one. Io is that a thing? 0:11:26.200 --> 0:11:27.640 Is that condiment for a steak? 0:11:27.720 --> 0:11:27.960 Yeah? 0:11:28.000 --> 0:11:30.280 You can put as much mayonnaise on anything, like literally, 0:11:30.280 --> 0:11:32.240 you could put mayonnaise on weep bigs and I make everything. 0:11:32.280 --> 0:11:34.560 I'm fine with that, okay this though, I'm not fine 0:11:34.559 --> 0:11:37.679 with tiramasou with a side of ketchup. Someone actually ordered 0:11:37.720 --> 0:11:40.440 tyramasu with the side of tomato sauce. And the last 0:11:40.480 --> 0:11:43.360 one that gave this lovely woman the eck was we 0:11:43.400 --> 0:11:46.640 went on a date and he ordered ice like a 0:11:46.640 --> 0:11:49.320 cup of ice because he felt sweaty, and then he 0:11:49.360 --> 0:11:51.240 sat there and sucked on ice for the entire day. 0:11:51.320 --> 0:11:53.360 Oh, no, I think that's okay. He's just hot. He's 0:11:53.360 --> 0:11:56.520 probably Mexico. No is he it's hot, he wants to 0:11:56.520 --> 0:11:58.959 cool down a bit of eyes. Nah, that one's all right. 0:11:59.000 --> 0:12:01.000 You can't just order on a date, Brittany and then 0:12:01.040 --> 0:12:03.719 suck ice like a child. What You're allowed to order 0:12:03.720 --> 0:12:06.160 a jug of milk? No, I think that's a terrible 0:12:06.160 --> 0:12:08.800 idea as well. Anyway, let's get into these questions. I'm 0:12:08.800 --> 0:12:11.199 gonna kick it off with question number one. I am 0:12:11.280 --> 0:12:12.920 in a bit of a pickle, and I'd like some 0:12:12.960 --> 0:12:15.800 perspective on this for context. At the start of the pandemic, 0:12:15.880 --> 0:12:17.760 I found out that my husband of a year was 0:12:17.840 --> 0:12:19.960 cheating on me. We tried to make it work, but 0:12:20.040 --> 0:12:23.120 ultimately we ended up getting divorced. Fast forward to now, 0:12:23.160 --> 0:12:25.760 and I've met someone who I think is truly my penguin, 0:12:25.800 --> 0:12:28.200 and it is the most fulfilling, happy relationship of my 0:12:28.240 --> 0:12:29.080 adult life. 0:12:29.520 --> 0:12:32.400 But Dun, Dun, Dun's always a butt. 0:12:32.800 --> 0:12:34.400 He really wants to get married. 0:12:34.600 --> 0:12:36.560 He talks a lot about it and says things like, oh, 0:12:36.600 --> 0:12:38.400 this could be a good wedding song, or I want 0:12:38.400 --> 0:12:40.760 to do these things for my bucks all locations that 0:12:40.800 --> 0:12:43.240 would be a nice location to propose that. But the 0:12:43.280 --> 0:12:45.280 thing is, I don't really want to get married again. 0:12:45.679 --> 0:12:49.120 Weddings ultimately are a huge cost and require so much 0:12:49.160 --> 0:12:51.079 time and energy, and I don't know if I have 0:12:51.160 --> 0:12:52.840 it in me to do it all again in what 0:12:52.960 --> 0:12:54.400 feels so soon. 0:12:54.880 --> 0:12:55.600 What should I do? 0:12:55.920 --> 0:12:58.120 Am I being unfair to deny him something that he 0:12:58.200 --> 0:13:00.840 clearly wants to do because I've already done it? Or 0:13:00.840 --> 0:13:03.160 do I say no just honestly because I want to 0:13:03.160 --> 0:13:05.560 focus on paying off my mortgage and starting a family. 0:13:07.559 --> 0:13:11.040 Okay, I think I know what I want to say here, 0:13:11.520 --> 0:13:14.960 Well go ahead, because usually you want to like chat 0:13:15.000 --> 0:13:17.080 it out and get to your answer. But I think 0:13:17.760 --> 0:13:19.680 you are completely entitled to say I don't want to 0:13:19.679 --> 0:13:21.679 do this again. I've put so much money into it. 0:13:21.720 --> 0:13:23.240 I don't want the big hoohark because I've done it 0:13:23.280 --> 0:13:25.840 once it didn't work. You've obviously got some feelings towards 0:13:25.880 --> 0:13:28.480 your last wedding and your last marriage, and that is 0:13:28.520 --> 0:13:32.439 completely okay. But your partner really wants to get married. 0:13:32.480 --> 0:13:34.200 So I think this is maybe a case of a 0:13:34.200 --> 0:13:37.080 conversation and a meet in the middle. Is there a 0:13:37.200 --> 0:13:40.960 reason that you can't get married officially, which is what 0:13:41.000 --> 0:13:42.520 he wants, because he might just want to feel like 0:13:42.559 --> 0:13:45.520 there is that commitment and you have said for the 0:13:45.520 --> 0:13:47.480 rest of your life, because there is something different about it. 0:13:47.520 --> 0:13:49.560 I'm not saying a wedding is the bill and end all, 0:13:49.760 --> 0:13:52.079 but for a lot of people, it's a comfort of like, oh, 0:13:52.160 --> 0:13:54.640 we are actually professing our love and saying we want 0:13:54.640 --> 0:13:56.640 to do this. So is there a middle ground of saying, 0:13:57.120 --> 0:13:59.000 maybe we can elope maybe we don't have to have 0:13:59.000 --> 0:14:02.000 the huge wedding and have ten friends and family so 0:14:02.040 --> 0:14:04.720 that he gets what he wants. He's getting that special 0:14:04.800 --> 0:14:06.800 moment he gets a wedding because he sounds like he 0:14:06.840 --> 0:14:09.760 hasn't been married before. And then you get what you want, 0:14:09.760 --> 0:14:12.520 which is not this whole, big, elaborate who hah. But 0:14:13.160 --> 0:14:16.120 you can't go and get married if you absolutely have 0:14:16.240 --> 0:14:19.040 an aversion to a wedding as a whole, and it's 0:14:19.040 --> 0:14:20.680 not just the idea of it being big and elaborate. 0:14:20.680 --> 0:14:22.280 But if you just don't want to do that wedding 0:14:22.280 --> 0:14:24.480 certificate again, you don't want to make it official again, 0:14:24.520 --> 0:14:26.880 then you do have to just be honest with him. 0:14:27.040 --> 0:14:28.680 I agree what you say, but I think that this 0:14:28.760 --> 0:14:31.160 is quite a tricky one because there's a very big 0:14:31.160 --> 0:14:34.080 difference between a wedding and a marriage, and that's something 0:14:34.160 --> 0:14:35.600 that only. 0:14:35.280 --> 0:14:37.120 You know what you feel comfortable with. 0:14:37.240 --> 0:14:40.480 Like, is it the fact that the wedding is expensive 0:14:40.480 --> 0:14:42.720 and hard to organize in all of that, or is 0:14:42.760 --> 0:14:44.760 it the fact that you don't want to be in 0:14:44.800 --> 0:14:47.160 a situation where you're married again and you feel like 0:14:47.200 --> 0:14:49.920 your life is completely tied to someone who could disappoint you. 0:14:50.400 --> 0:14:51.160 I agree with you. 0:14:51.360 --> 0:14:54.520 A one year out from your recent divorce and being 0:14:54.520 --> 0:14:58.000 in a your relationship is a really soon time period, 0:14:58.040 --> 0:15:00.200 and I think it is quick, yeah, really quick. And 0:15:00.240 --> 0:15:02.000 I think if you were to have that conversation with 0:15:02.080 --> 0:15:04.200 him of like, you are the person I want to 0:15:04.240 --> 0:15:07.120 be with. I see this potentially in the future. But 0:15:07.320 --> 0:15:10.120 right now, I'm not ready to get married. I don't 0:15:10.120 --> 0:15:13.560 think that that's an unreasonable expectation or thing to say, Like, 0:15:13.560 --> 0:15:15.760 I don't think you're being unreasonable by saying I'm not 0:15:15.840 --> 0:15:18.240 ready to get married again. But that doesn't mean that 0:15:18.280 --> 0:15:20.960 it changes my feelings for you. I also think that 0:15:21.000 --> 0:15:22.840 the reason why he's bringing it up and saying, oh, 0:15:22.840 --> 0:15:24.920 this is a great place to get proposal, like this 0:15:24.960 --> 0:15:27.320