1 00:00:00,440 --> 00:00:03,920 Speaker 1: Mister Wicks. Yes, how long was it into the relationship 2 00:00:04,040 --> 00:00:07,160 Speaker 1: with April that she felt pregnant? Like eight years? 3 00:00:07,560 --> 00:00:07,840 Speaker 2: Okay? 4 00:00:08,960 --> 00:00:13,119 Speaker 1: Wow, wow, Well this one's a little bit different. Ash, 5 00:00:13,240 --> 00:00:16,120 Speaker 1: we have a guest who did things a little bit differently. 6 00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:19,639 Speaker 1: I'm talking about Sam Frost. She is beautiful, down to 7 00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:21,240 Speaker 1: worth and hilarious. 8 00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:21,599 Speaker 3: Yeah. 9 00:00:21,640 --> 00:00:23,160 Speaker 1: Sam is the Bachelorette alumni. 10 00:00:23,360 --> 00:00:26,079 Speaker 4: She's gone on to build a career in radio acting 11 00:00:26,120 --> 00:00:28,760 Speaker 4: on Home and Away and now travels around Queenslane in 12 00:00:28,800 --> 00:00:30,640 Speaker 4: a caravan with her family. 13 00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:33,680 Speaker 1: She takes us through the wild ride of early pregnancy, 14 00:00:33,800 --> 00:00:37,159 Speaker 1: a late stage scare with baby Teddy and Jordie, her 15 00:00:37,240 --> 00:00:40,240 Speaker 1: partner his perfect timing while Sam was in labor. 16 00:00:40,479 --> 00:00:43,199 Speaker 4: Yes, a strange request from young Jordi while his partner's 17 00:00:43,479 --> 00:00:44,520 Speaker 4: sitting there in pain. 18 00:00:44,680 --> 00:00:46,879 Speaker 1: Well, thankfully he was in the right place in hospital. 19 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,600 Speaker 1: Who knows what could have happened, well said. 20 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:51,879 Speaker 4: She also opens up about a mental health seeing a 21 00:00:51,920 --> 00:00:54,840 Speaker 4: psych before giving birth, and learning that the most important 22 00:00:54,840 --> 00:00:58,000 Speaker 4: thing in parenting isn't getting it perfect, it's knowing how 23 00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:00,440 Speaker 4: to repair when you don't all right into it. 24 00:01:00,520 --> 00:01:13,080 Speaker 2: Let's do it. 25 00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:18,559 Speaker 1: Welcome back to two doting dads and one dorting mom. 26 00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:19,720 Speaker 1: I'm Maddie, j. 27 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:22,200 Speaker 3: I'm Ash, and I'm Sam. 28 00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:29,920 Speaker 1: Now at it. This is a podcast all about parenting. 29 00:01:29,920 --> 00:01:32,800 Speaker 1: It is the good, it is the bad and the relatable. 30 00:01:32,920 --> 00:01:36,440 Speaker 1: And we never give advice. Sam, We never do it. 31 00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:39,320 Speaker 1: We never will, We never wanted to. We have no 32 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:44,000 Speaker 1: desire but for you. If you have advice, by all means, 33 00:01:44,080 --> 00:01:45,000 Speaker 1: we will never stop you. 34 00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:48,559 Speaker 4: Yeah, there's a loophole we let guests give advice because 35 00:01:48,600 --> 00:01:49,200 Speaker 4: it's illegal. 36 00:01:49,440 --> 00:01:51,080 Speaker 1: Loophole. Every time we try. 37 00:01:50,920 --> 00:01:54,040 Speaker 4: To do it, people are like, let's stop doing it 38 00:01:54,040 --> 00:01:54,800 Speaker 4: all Sam. 39 00:01:54,840 --> 00:01:57,040 Speaker 1: There is a question that we start with every guest. 40 00:01:57,040 --> 00:02:02,160 Speaker 4: And it is do you remember the most trouble you 41 00:02:02,160 --> 00:02:03,200 Speaker 4: got in as a child. 42 00:02:03,800 --> 00:02:07,680 Speaker 1: Jeez, I feel like I put you on the spot. 43 00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:10,320 Speaker 1: You did and if you didn't get in much trouble that. 44 00:02:11,480 --> 00:02:14,040 Speaker 3: I don't think my parents particularly liked me either, rebec 45 00:02:14,280 --> 00:02:17,480 Speaker 3: so it's like my whole childhood or just a moment. No, 46 00:02:19,080 --> 00:02:21,600 Speaker 3: let me think you guys are like fuck. 47 00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:24,680 Speaker 1: Rebellious as a child. 48 00:02:24,760 --> 00:02:29,240 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I never. I Actually I really loved school, 49 00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:31,120 Speaker 3: loved it, but I got into a lot of trouble 50 00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:34,600 Speaker 3: because I was quite cheeky. It wasn't like, you know, 51 00:02:35,080 --> 00:02:38,320 Speaker 3: awfully naughty, it's just like mate, like, come on, stop 52 00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:39,880 Speaker 3: being smarter, stopping. 53 00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:43,040 Speaker 1: Like smoking in the toilets making no, I actually never smoked. 54 00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:45,720 Speaker 1: B Wow, well done. 55 00:02:46,120 --> 00:02:49,519 Speaker 3: Did you wag classes always? Like, you know, just things 56 00:02:49,560 --> 00:02:51,760 Speaker 3: like that, Like I think I ye, I would get 57 00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:57,040 Speaker 3: in trouble for just like normal school rebellion. I think, yeah, 58 00:02:57,120 --> 00:03:01,120 Speaker 3: I remember once my mum she grounded me for an 59 00:03:01,240 --> 00:03:04,160 Speaker 3: entire year. Who yeah, when I was in primary school 60 00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:06,760 Speaker 3: for what I can't remember And I bring it up 61 00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:07,440 Speaker 3: now and she goes. 62 00:03:07,360 --> 00:03:08,480 Speaker 1: Yeah, that happened. 63 00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:11,919 Speaker 3: I can't remember why I did that. And I was like, mom, 64 00:03:11,919 --> 00:03:15,679 Speaker 3: that's fucked up. I was like the worst mom ever, 65 00:03:17,919 --> 00:03:20,440 Speaker 3: something so bad. But she's like, yeah, yeah, I can't remember, 66 00:03:20,480 --> 00:03:23,600 Speaker 3: but still like defends it. And I'm like, that's really bad. 67 00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:25,960 Speaker 4: And they defended, like Matt said, They're like, well, I 68 00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:27,200 Speaker 4: guess I'm just the worst mother. 69 00:03:27,320 --> 00:03:34,080 Speaker 1: Resident I know said I didn't work in any way? 70 00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:36,280 Speaker 1: Did it? Did it help you to be who you 71 00:03:36,320 --> 00:03:36,720 Speaker 1: are now? 72 00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:41,320 Speaker 3: Now? I'm like really introverted and get awkward in social situations, 73 00:03:41,360 --> 00:03:45,320 Speaker 3: so probably yeah, I'm really grateful. 74 00:03:46,240 --> 00:03:48,680 Speaker 1: And then growing up after school, were you someone who 75 00:03:48,720 --> 00:03:50,200 Speaker 1: always wanted to have a family? 76 00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:53,480 Speaker 3: Yes, yeah, I think I always did. I love I'm 77 00:03:53,480 --> 00:03:55,280 Speaker 3: one of six. I've got four brothers and a sister, 78 00:03:55,640 --> 00:03:59,440 Speaker 3: so I love the chaos, I love the fun, I 79 00:03:59,480 --> 00:04:02,200 Speaker 3: love tea, I love your bully. 80 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:02,760 Speaker 1: Yeah. 81 00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:06,240 Speaker 3: Basically, in my family, there's always one target, and you 82 00:04:06,240 --> 00:04:07,720 Speaker 3: don't know who it's going to be. Like we all 83 00:04:07,720 --> 00:04:09,680 Speaker 3: get together and you're like, who's going to fuck up first? 84 00:04:12,160 --> 00:04:14,880 Speaker 3: And then like it's just in from there and it's fine. 85 00:04:15,120 --> 00:04:17,120 Speaker 3: My family says that I can dish it out very well, 86 00:04:17,160 --> 00:04:19,360 Speaker 3: but when it's me, I don't handle it very well. 87 00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:24,160 Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, you prefer to just dish it. 88 00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:24,760 Speaker 1: I feel it. 89 00:04:24,880 --> 00:04:25,320 Speaker 2: I feel it. 90 00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:27,520 Speaker 1: So four do you say? Four brothers? 91 00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:28,760 Speaker 3: Four brothers and a sister and. 92 00:04:28,720 --> 00:04:31,039 Speaker 4: Your sister, And where do you sit on that scale 93 00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:31,680 Speaker 4: of eldest? 94 00:04:31,960 --> 00:04:32,360 Speaker 2: Number four? 95 00:04:32,360 --> 00:04:34,320 Speaker 3: So I've got two older brothers, an older sister, me 96 00:04:34,480 --> 00:04:36,479 Speaker 3: and my two little brothers, so I'm in the middle. 97 00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:39,599 Speaker 3: So yeah, I mean I think that's a good spot. 98 00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:41,040 Speaker 1: Do you think you want to have that many kids 99 00:04:41,040 --> 00:04:41,760 Speaker 1: yourself or lot? 100 00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:45,520 Speaker 3: You know, if I was younger, I probably would, but 101 00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:47,760 Speaker 3: like I'm thirty six, and then if I go again, 102 00:04:47,760 --> 00:04:54,400 Speaker 3: I'll be like, what thirty eight? Maybe four? Yeah, I 103 00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:57,640 Speaker 3: don't know. It's funny because I during my second my 104 00:04:57,640 --> 00:05:02,400 Speaker 3: pregnancy that I just did with Bobby. I hate being pregnant. 105 00:05:02,440 --> 00:05:05,039 Speaker 3: I absolutely hate it. I mean I wish I could 106 00:05:05,080 --> 00:05:06,040 Speaker 3: be grateful about it. 107 00:05:06,360 --> 00:05:07,880 Speaker 1: For what reason do you hate it? 108 00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:11,800 Speaker 3: I was so sick and just like constantly vomiting up, 109 00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:13,040 Speaker 3: constantly sick. 110 00:05:12,880 --> 00:05:14,760 Speaker 1: For Teddy or eldest and for Bobby. 111 00:05:15,200 --> 00:05:18,520 Speaker 3: Fo Yeah, yeah, it was awful. And then I speak 112 00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:20,840 Speaker 3: to girlfriends and I'm like, oh, how's your pregnancy going. Okay, 113 00:05:20,839 --> 00:05:22,960 Speaker 3: I must be tough. They're like, yeah, I guess I'm 114 00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:24,080 Speaker 3: a bit tired. 115 00:05:23,880 --> 00:05:27,560 Speaker 1: And I'm just like, it's funny. 116 00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:30,440 Speaker 4: We had a question on our Weekly episode about what 117 00:05:30,480 --> 00:05:32,640 Speaker 4: not do stated parents. That's a good one, right, Yeah, 118 00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:35,640 Speaker 4: especially if it's like they're like, oh, yeah, I'm really 119 00:05:35,720 --> 00:05:36,640 Speaker 4: enjoying my pregnancy. 120 00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:39,880 Speaker 3: It's like I can't handle it. I just I don't 121 00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:41,560 Speaker 3: know what to say to them. I can't relate to them. 122 00:05:41,600 --> 00:05:42,960 Speaker 3: I'm just like, oh, it must be nice. 123 00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:45,679 Speaker 1: What's the worst place that you think you got sick? 124 00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:47,200 Speaker 1: Just out of the blue. 125 00:05:47,440 --> 00:05:51,279 Speaker 3: Oh, I've thrown up on a plane and that was 126 00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:54,120 Speaker 3: pretty that was pretty bad. Like I was flying in 127 00:05:54,360 --> 00:05:57,640 Speaker 3: to Sydney. I think I was in maybe like twenty 128 00:05:57,680 --> 00:05:59,640 Speaker 3: five ish, like I was in the twenty zone, so 129 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:02,160 Speaker 3: I thought I was safe because generally it's earlier on. 130 00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:04,720 Speaker 3: So I'm like, no, I'm sweet. And then there was 131 00:06:04,760 --> 00:06:06,640 Speaker 3: a bit of turbulence on the plane and I was like, 132 00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:10,200 Speaker 3: oh no, no, no, and it was like we had 133 00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:12,400 Speaker 3: to buckle in and I just like started. I got 134 00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:14,120 Speaker 3: the vomit back and I was vomiting. But I was 135 00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:19,320 Speaker 3: vomiting so much. I was like it was it was 136 00:06:19,360 --> 00:06:23,240 Speaker 3: in my hair, and I was like, stop throwing. 137 00:06:23,240 --> 00:06:25,440 Speaker 1: Did you at least have like a spare seat next 138 00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:25,720 Speaker 1: to you? 139 00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:28,760 Speaker 3: I had this beautiful elderly couple next to me and 140 00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:37,080 Speaker 3: they're like and I was like the whole plane could 141 00:06:37,240 --> 00:06:41,200 Speaker 3: smell it. It was and I'm sure there's someone else 142 00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:46,039 Speaker 3: is going horrendous. That was probably the worst. 143 00:06:46,040 --> 00:06:48,640 Speaker 1: Was it like was it an easy coming vomit or 144 00:06:48,680 --> 00:06:49,200 Speaker 1: were you going? 145 00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:53,599 Speaker 3: It was just like it was just splurging out of 146 00:06:53,600 --> 00:06:56,120 Speaker 3: my mouth. I can't even lie and once it started 147 00:06:56,200 --> 00:06:57,839 Speaker 3: just didn't stop, and then the bag was falling. It 148 00:06:57,880 --> 00:06:59,919 Speaker 3: was just, honestly, someone's going so. 149 00:07:04,160 --> 00:07:04,360 Speaker 2: Quick? 150 00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:08,880 Speaker 1: Did you find you were carrying? My wife did this April. 151 00:07:08,920 --> 00:07:12,080 Speaker 4: She carried around vomit bags for like her whole pregnancy, 152 00:07:12,120 --> 00:07:13,200 Speaker 4: because it's like she just. 153 00:07:13,040 --> 00:07:13,640 Speaker 1: Just didn't know. 154 00:07:14,040 --> 00:07:16,280 Speaker 3: Look, I wasn't that. I wasn't that forward thinking. I 155 00:07:16,280 --> 00:07:18,920 Speaker 3: thought I was a bit more optimistic all right, foolishly 156 00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:22,200 Speaker 3: of course, but yeah, it wasn't yuck. 157 00:07:22,560 --> 00:07:25,240 Speaker 1: Did you have any any cravings? I know Laura she 158 00:07:25,440 --> 00:07:29,160 Speaker 1: really likes Magie noodles and she likes cordial ginger beer 159 00:07:29,160 --> 00:07:30,920 Speaker 1: as well. It's quite helpful for her. Was there anything 160 00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:31,520 Speaker 1: that you had? 161 00:07:31,760 --> 00:07:34,600 Speaker 3: I did macas run far too regularly, and that's why 162 00:07:34,640 --> 00:07:36,960 Speaker 3: I'm like now, like, oh god, it gained a lot 163 00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:40,840 Speaker 3: of weight. And yeah, like chicken burgers, like man, I 164 00:07:40,840 --> 00:07:44,080 Speaker 3: would smash one like nearly every single day. Really you 165 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:47,200 Speaker 3: could eat and then obviously I was like, yeah it 166 00:07:47,240 --> 00:07:54,120 Speaker 3: was I hate actually thinking and even smells like I 167 00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:57,200 Speaker 3: like smells. Jeordie had this deogorant he would wear in 168 00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:59,400 Speaker 3: the first round, Master like get rid of it, like 169 00:07:59,440 --> 00:08:00,520 Speaker 3: I can't hand still. 170 00:08:00,600 --> 00:08:02,160 Speaker 4: I remember sitting on the bus with April and she 171 00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:03,880 Speaker 4: would on the way to the city and she'd get sick. 172 00:08:04,160 --> 00:08:05,880 Speaker 1: It was like, oh, I feel so sorry for you, 173 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:09,480 Speaker 1: so sorry that you had to experience that on an airport. 174 00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:12,560 Speaker 1: If it makes you feel any better, we spoke before 175 00:08:12,640 --> 00:08:18,600 Speaker 1: Laura's twenty sixty seventy eighty easy and she was vomiting 176 00:08:18,600 --> 00:08:21,239 Speaker 1: the other morning. Wow, Okay, yeah, that's brutal. 177 00:08:21,520 --> 00:08:23,239 Speaker 3: And it must be hard because this is their third 178 00:08:23,360 --> 00:08:25,400 Speaker 3: so you got two other kids that you have to 179 00:08:25,400 --> 00:08:28,200 Speaker 3: look after as well. So that's that's pretty brutal for it. 180 00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:31,280 Speaker 1: That'll be fine this st of self sufficion. Now, I 181 00:08:31,320 --> 00:08:34,520 Speaker 1: do want to talk about about Teddy, but before we 182 00:08:34,679 --> 00:08:36,920 Speaker 1: do that, was it ever a point? I know that 183 00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:39,240 Speaker 1: I always wanted to have kids, and I had a 184 00:08:39,280 --> 00:08:42,640 Speaker 1: moment kind of weirdly happened before we got pregnant. I 185 00:08:42,720 --> 00:08:45,720 Speaker 1: was with law at the time, but I remember thinking, oh, gosh, 186 00:08:45,760 --> 00:08:47,240 Speaker 1: I'm kind of getting a little bit older now I'm 187 00:08:47,240 --> 00:08:50,360 Speaker 1: in my thirties, and maybe Laura and I haven't tried 188 00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:53,520 Speaker 1: to have kids, and maybe we won't have kids, Like 189 00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:56,160 Speaker 1: there's no guarantee that you guys are going to fell 190 00:08:56,200 --> 00:09:00,000 Speaker 1: pregnant easily. And I remember it kind of happened weird coincident. 191 00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:02,120 Speaker 1: It's right before she feel pregnant. But I was like, 192 00:09:02,360 --> 00:09:05,280 Speaker 1: had the thought of, you know, it might not happen 193 00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:07,400 Speaker 1: for me even though I really wanted. Did you ever 194 00:09:07,440 --> 00:09:07,960 Speaker 1: have that thought? 195 00:09:08,320 --> 00:09:12,200 Speaker 3: Always I often thought it because I also have a 196 00:09:12,280 --> 00:09:15,320 Speaker 3: lot of girlfriends in my friendship circle that have had 197 00:09:15,679 --> 00:09:19,200 Speaker 3: so much uple falling pregnant, and it's been years and 198 00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:21,559 Speaker 3: years and I've been they'd been my best friends as well, 199 00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:24,840 Speaker 3: So I've walked with them as they grieve as they 200 00:09:25,360 --> 00:09:29,280 Speaker 3: have like even month to month, like every time they 201 00:09:29,280 --> 00:09:32,320 Speaker 3: get their period, they feel like they've failed. And I've 202 00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:35,839 Speaker 3: walked with them during that and it's been so hard, 203 00:09:35,960 --> 00:09:38,320 Speaker 3: and I hadn't tried, and so I was just like 204 00:09:38,400 --> 00:09:41,360 Speaker 3: that I could what's to say, I'm any different? So 205 00:09:41,440 --> 00:09:45,920 Speaker 3: I did. I often did think that it wasn't gonna 206 00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:48,280 Speaker 3: happen for me. I just I don't know. I just 207 00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:51,200 Speaker 3: had this feeling that I thought, it's something that I 208 00:09:51,280 --> 00:09:54,679 Speaker 3: want so badly that surely the universe isn't going to 209 00:09:54,720 --> 00:09:55,480 Speaker 3: give it to me, you. 210 00:09:55,440 --> 00:10:00,079 Speaker 1: Know, protection that you're doing to yourself. Yeah wow, it 211 00:10:00,200 --> 00:10:02,280 Speaker 1: was you with Jordie at that point. 212 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:07,040 Speaker 3: Yeah, well it wasn't. It wasn't. I had those feelings 213 00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:10,640 Speaker 3: prior to that, years before that. And it was also 214 00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:12,400 Speaker 3: not knowing if I was going to meet the right 215 00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:18,000 Speaker 3: person because I liked a lot very unsuccessfully something you 216 00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:18,839 Speaker 3: might not about. 217 00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:22,800 Speaker 1: I had on another podcast and tell me if this 218 00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:26,560 Speaker 1: is not the case. You said that other relationships, older ones, 219 00:10:26,840 --> 00:10:29,400 Speaker 1: they gave you a lot of anxiety. Yes, And I 220 00:10:29,440 --> 00:10:32,760 Speaker 1: think Laura has always spoken about her previous relationships being 221 00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:36,319 Speaker 1: ones that weren't like a safe, warm, happy place for her. 222 00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:39,400 Speaker 1: So when you got with Jordie, we were like this 223 00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:42,400 Speaker 1: is kind of boring, or we like, this is amazing. 224 00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:43,760 Speaker 1: I've been missing this my whole life. 225 00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:46,160 Speaker 3: I never thought it was boring. I did think. 226 00:10:46,559 --> 00:10:47,400 Speaker 1: Laura calls me boring. 227 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:52,400 Speaker 3: But yeah, so like all my previous relationships, I've always 228 00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:55,400 Speaker 3: felt really anxious and it was very unhealthy relationships. And 229 00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:57,600 Speaker 3: then when I met Jordie, I actually thought when I 230 00:10:57,640 --> 00:11:00,280 Speaker 3: first met him, because he's so loving and he's so 231 00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:06,000 Speaker 3: attentive and very emotionally intelligent and loves to communicate how 232 00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:10,120 Speaker 3: he's feeling emotionally, which is very rare, like a never 233 00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:12,720 Speaker 3: I've always had to be like, what is this guy thinking? 234 00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:16,240 Speaker 3: You know previously and I'm like trying to like dissect text, 235 00:11:16,280 --> 00:11:19,120 Speaker 3: going like I think he likes me, while Geordie's like 236 00:11:19,240 --> 00:11:22,160 Speaker 3: very forward with how he feels. And I remember at 237 00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:24,280 Speaker 3: the time when I first met him, I was just like, 238 00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:26,520 Speaker 3: whoa this is so weird, like. 239 00:11:27,360 --> 00:11:28,160 Speaker 1: Do I want this? 240 00:11:28,440 --> 00:11:28,600 Speaker 2: Well? 241 00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:30,920 Speaker 3: I was actually more thinking like this has to be 242 00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:40,520 Speaker 3: like a trap like this, you know, because it's you know, yes, correct, Like, yes, 243 00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:41,440 Speaker 3: it's a real term. 244 00:11:41,480 --> 00:11:42,400 Speaker 1: I've been married for too long. 245 00:11:43,640 --> 00:11:45,880 Speaker 3: That's what I thought. I honestly was like, Oh, maybe 246 00:11:45,880 --> 00:11:48,120 Speaker 3: he's just love bombing me. Maybe he's like a piece 247 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:50,079 Speaker 3: of shit, you know, I don't know, like, and then 248 00:11:50,520 --> 00:11:52,760 Speaker 3: I had to work through it and go, oh no, 249 00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:57,000 Speaker 3: he's just a genuinely loving and affectionate person. And he's 250 00:11:57,040 --> 00:11:59,640 Speaker 3: still like that, Like he's so loving. And it took 251 00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:03,880 Speaker 3: me a while while to adjust to a healthy relationship. Yeah, 252 00:12:03,920 --> 00:12:06,720 Speaker 3: And I remember my psychologist saying to me, she's like, 253 00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:12,559 Speaker 3: the hardest relationships after you've been in abusive relationships or toxic, 254 00:12:12,679 --> 00:12:16,160 Speaker 3: you know, unhealthy ones, is the healthy relationships because then 255 00:12:16,200 --> 00:12:18,280 Speaker 3: they come along and you're not used to that, and 256 00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:20,680 Speaker 3: so you have to sort of settle your nervous system 257 00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:21,559 Speaker 3: and because. 258 00:12:21,280 --> 00:12:23,640 Speaker 1: You could sabotage it right without even knowing. 259 00:12:24,040 --> 00:12:25,959 Speaker 3: I'm a massive sabotage. 260 00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:26,240 Speaker 5: Yeah. 261 00:12:26,280 --> 00:12:28,640 Speaker 1: And speaking of JORDI, where did you meet Jordy? 262 00:12:29,080 --> 00:12:30,080 Speaker 3: I met him in a pub. 263 00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:34,400 Speaker 1: I wonder if we went. 264 00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:39,880 Speaker 4: Back through all that guests and then yeah. 265 00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:41,640 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, so we met Actually yeah, we met 266 00:12:41,640 --> 00:12:43,960 Speaker 3: in a pub and he was friends with my brother. 267 00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:44,320 Speaker 2: Yeah. 268 00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:46,160 Speaker 3: At the time, I was like, oh, yeah, he's cute, 269 00:12:46,240 --> 00:12:48,920 Speaker 3: but I didn't really think too much about it. Yeah, 270 00:12:48,920 --> 00:12:52,199 Speaker 3: a few weeks later I was like, nah, I'm going 271 00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:54,760 Speaker 3: to hit him up. Oh yeah, and Jeordie always likes 272 00:12:54,760 --> 00:12:55,640 Speaker 3: to talverybody's like. 273 00:12:55,679 --> 00:12:59,920 Speaker 1: She hit on me. 274 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:02,040 Speaker 3: And I did. Yeah. Then when we obviously were in 275 00:13:02,040 --> 00:13:06,400 Speaker 3: a really good relationship, I was like, okay, TikTok, let's. 276 00:13:06,160 --> 00:13:07,880 Speaker 1: Get this show on the road. That's right. 277 00:13:07,920 --> 00:13:11,920 Speaker 4: And then yeah, and how long was it before you 278 00:13:12,040 --> 00:13:14,760 Speaker 4: met and you decided that he was the one that 279 00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:15,680 Speaker 4: you wanted to have kids with. 280 00:13:15,720 --> 00:13:17,160 Speaker 3: Oh? Mate, it was pretty early on. It was like 281 00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:20,320 Speaker 3: then three months later. I was like, all right, you're 282 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:23,360 Speaker 3: really three months Yeah it was really wow, you just 283 00:13:23,400 --> 00:13:24,640 Speaker 3: knew knew. 284 00:13:24,679 --> 00:13:26,839 Speaker 1: It sounds a bit woo woo, so bear with me, 285 00:13:26,920 --> 00:13:27,840 Speaker 1: but when you know, you know. 286 00:13:28,960 --> 00:13:31,880 Speaker 3: It was avoiding saying that because it's so cliche, but 287 00:13:31,960 --> 00:13:34,400 Speaker 3: it's true, Like when you know, you know, and I 288 00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:37,959 Speaker 3: just think, yeah, I just knew, and it's really sweet. Actually, 289 00:13:38,160 --> 00:13:39,480 Speaker 3: yeah it was. It was the best. 290 00:13:39,559 --> 00:13:42,600 Speaker 1: And after you fell pregnant, you're towards the tail end, 291 00:13:42,600 --> 00:13:46,079 Speaker 1: and this is with Teddy. You're first something happened. Was 292 00:13:46,120 --> 00:13:49,720 Speaker 1: it at nighttime that there's a lack of movement that 293 00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:51,000 Speaker 1: raised alarm bells for you? 294 00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:56,079 Speaker 3: It was around my due date. And ted had always 295 00:13:56,160 --> 00:13:59,959 Speaker 3: been a very active little kid, like in my stumf. 296 00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:03,320 Speaker 3: He never like he It's funny because like the patterns 297 00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:05,120 Speaker 3: that he would wake up he was doing once he 298 00:14:05,200 --> 00:14:07,240 Speaker 3: was born. It was very cute. But yeah, so he 299 00:14:07,320 --> 00:14:09,480 Speaker 3: was very active. He would wake up at two and 300 00:14:09,559 --> 00:14:10,679 Speaker 3: like kick around. 301 00:14:10,920 --> 00:14:14,800 Speaker 1: So really dumb here, but you can like like there's 302 00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:19,200 Speaker 1: like a rhythm to the baby, yeah behaving. Yeah I knew, 303 00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:23,120 Speaker 1: I knew about movements. Let me just preface this sentence 304 00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:24,000 Speaker 1: saying that I. 305 00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:28,040 Speaker 4: Don't say like an absolute idiot, but yeah, like a routine. 306 00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:29,560 Speaker 1: He's in there. 307 00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:32,320 Speaker 3: Yeah, do you know what you can feel? It like 308 00:14:32,360 --> 00:14:35,200 Speaker 3: you can feel like I mean, they must get their 309 00:14:35,520 --> 00:14:36,320 Speaker 3: cues from you. 310 00:14:36,440 --> 00:14:39,320 Speaker 1: I would assume, like when you're sleeping. Yeah, like I 311 00:14:39,600 --> 00:14:41,520 Speaker 1: wake you up when you're sleeping, getting you prepared for that. 312 00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:44,480 Speaker 3: Exactly, And he did. And so he would like wake 313 00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:46,360 Speaker 3: up for a few hours and you go to sleep, 314 00:14:46,440 --> 00:14:47,840 Speaker 3: and then he would wake up again and so I 315 00:14:47,880 --> 00:14:49,800 Speaker 3: could feel I sort of knew his routine, like when 316 00:14:49,800 --> 00:14:51,200 Speaker 3: he would go to sleep and when he would wake 317 00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:55,160 Speaker 3: up and be active. And so then towards the due date, 318 00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:58,920 Speaker 3: he just completely stopped moving. And it was one of 319 00:14:59,720 --> 00:15:02,960 Speaker 3: it was a time where I think mother's intuition had 320 00:15:02,960 --> 00:15:05,640 Speaker 3: to kick in and I was just like, something is 321 00:15:05,680 --> 00:15:07,960 Speaker 3: not right, and you go. And I went to a 322 00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:11,000 Speaker 3: midwife appointment and I was like, he's not moving. He's 323 00:15:11,080 --> 00:15:13,400 Speaker 3: usually very active, and they're like did their scans and 324 00:15:13,440 --> 00:15:15,960 Speaker 3: tests and they were like, look, we're happy with like 325 00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:19,760 Speaker 3: he's there, his heartbeats strong, We're okay. And I was like, okay, okay, 326 00:15:20,360 --> 00:15:22,640 Speaker 3: and they sent me home and you take. 327 00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:23,640 Speaker 1: That as gospel. 328 00:15:24,440 --> 00:15:27,400 Speaker 4: The expert, Yeah, the heartbeats fine, and like that's a 329 00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:30,200 Speaker 4: massive relief for any expecting it's. 330 00:15:30,120 --> 00:15:32,880 Speaker 1: Just my anxiety again. Yeah, he could be feeling my 331 00:15:32,960 --> 00:15:34,760 Speaker 1: anxiety and his sort of yeah. 332 00:15:34,760 --> 00:15:36,840 Speaker 3: And then I thought, oh, maybe before they come out, 333 00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:38,920 Speaker 3: maybe they just stopped moving. I don't know, Like it 334 00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:41,200 Speaker 3: was my first time, I had no idea, and every 335 00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:43,560 Speaker 3: pregnancy is different, so all my friends have different stories 336 00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:45,840 Speaker 3: as well. But then the second night I went home 337 00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:48,560 Speaker 3: and I laid awake all night just with my hand 338 00:15:48,560 --> 00:15:51,040 Speaker 3: on my stomach, and I was like, man, he's not moving, 339 00:15:51,520 --> 00:15:54,720 Speaker 3: and just that anxiety. So I went in the next 340 00:15:54,800 --> 00:15:57,360 Speaker 3: day and I was just like, you have to check this. 341 00:15:57,440 --> 00:16:00,600 Speaker 3: I'm telling you something is wrong with my baby. And 342 00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:05,040 Speaker 3: then they checked and he ended up having an irregular 343 00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:08,480 Speaker 3: heartbeat and they think that he wasn't getting nutrients from 344 00:16:08,480 --> 00:16:11,000 Speaker 3: the placenta anymore. So they're like, we're going to get 345 00:16:11,040 --> 00:16:13,720 Speaker 3: him out right now. So they I was induced and 346 00:16:13,760 --> 00:16:14,960 Speaker 3: he came out five hours later. 347 00:16:15,120 --> 00:16:15,440 Speaker 1: Holy. 348 00:16:15,800 --> 00:16:15,960 Speaker 3: Yeah. 349 00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:18,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, And you said it was around the Jude date. 350 00:16:19,320 --> 00:16:20,040 Speaker 1: Whereabouts were you? 351 00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:21,880 Speaker 3: I think it was actually a couple of days after 352 00:16:21,920 --> 00:16:23,240 Speaker 3: the Jue date, so I think I was like forty 353 00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:23,960 Speaker 3: and three or something. 354 00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, so he's ready. He was ready. He was ready, Okay. 355 00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:29,520 Speaker 3: But yeah, and it's just, you know, it's so scary 356 00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:31,760 Speaker 3: when you think, oh, what happened if I had just 357 00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:34,920 Speaker 3: let him stay there and I didn't, if I just 358 00:16:35,040 --> 00:16:36,520 Speaker 3: I don't know. I mean, you can always. 359 00:16:36,760 --> 00:16:41,200 Speaker 1: About it, but I know we have been speaking to 360 00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:46,920 Speaker 1: a lot of experts lately, Sam about childbirth and what 361 00:16:47,040 --> 00:16:50,600 Speaker 1: dads can do in that environment. Was there anything in 362 00:16:50,640 --> 00:16:55,400 Speaker 1: particular that Jeordie did that was very helpful and if 363 00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:57,920 Speaker 1: it doesn't have to be To be honest, Ash and 364 00:16:57,960 --> 00:17:00,640 Speaker 1: I were both a bit average. Yeah, we'd call it. 365 00:17:01,280 --> 00:17:03,040 Speaker 1: At the same time. Was there anything that he did 366 00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:04,960 Speaker 1: that you were like, probably wouldn't do that. 367 00:17:04,880 --> 00:17:07,320 Speaker 3: Again, Well, you know what, he was actually pretty good. 368 00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:09,120 Speaker 1: I hate to put him on the spot here, Sam, 369 00:17:09,240 --> 00:17:10,920 Speaker 1: because we love Jordy. He's a great guy. 370 00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:14,200 Speaker 4: It great sounds like a really emotional, available, mature man, 371 00:17:14,359 --> 00:17:16,080 Speaker 4: which which we love. 372 00:17:16,200 --> 00:17:19,399 Speaker 1: We stand, we love that. But I heard that he 373 00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:22,440 Speaker 1: did have a request to a nurse or a midwife. 374 00:17:22,840 --> 00:17:25,800 Speaker 1: And again, Jeordie, I love you. Yeah, look, no shame, 375 00:17:26,119 --> 00:17:29,159 Speaker 1: no shame, no, no shame. What was it? What to 376 00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:29,720 Speaker 1: ask for? 377 00:17:30,280 --> 00:17:32,880 Speaker 3: So Jordy while I. 378 00:17:32,960 --> 00:17:35,399 Speaker 1: Was and Jeordie, we love you again, asked for a 379 00:17:35,440 --> 00:17:38,439 Speaker 1: cigarette while I was in labor. 380 00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:42,320 Speaker 3: Obviously my body is going through a whole lot. Let 381 00:17:42,359 --> 00:17:43,280 Speaker 3: me just emphasize. 382 00:17:43,720 --> 00:17:46,320 Speaker 1: Also, we'll just preface that we've done a TENS machine, 383 00:17:46,359 --> 00:17:50,959 Speaker 1: so we get, we get we're brave. Okay, we are 384 00:17:51,040 --> 00:17:51,640 Speaker 1: brave man. 385 00:17:52,640 --> 00:17:53,320 Speaker 3: That is so. 386 00:17:56,240 --> 00:17:58,760 Speaker 1: We got to be like, okay, that's true. 387 00:17:58,760 --> 00:18:01,040 Speaker 4: We did do a TENS machine and like we couldn't 388 00:18:01,040 --> 00:18:02,200 Speaker 4: hack level ten. 389 00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:05,919 Speaker 3: Yeah, we got to you guys must know exactly what. 390 00:18:05,920 --> 00:18:10,280 Speaker 3: It's like, yeah, yeah, but yeah, JORDI had a headache, 391 00:18:10,359 --> 00:18:16,240 Speaker 3: so the guy and I was like, you know, obviously 392 00:18:16,400 --> 00:18:19,400 Speaker 3: in the thick of it, and I was say ten, 393 00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:22,200 Speaker 3: and Jordie was like, I hate to be that guy, 394 00:18:22,359 --> 00:18:28,480 Speaker 3: but I got a killer headache like you. 395 00:18:29,520 --> 00:18:32,840 Speaker 1: And he's like, can you what about me? 396 00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:36,560 Speaker 3: I know? And I still give him a hard time 397 00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:40,960 Speaker 3: about that and is he regret asking heard me talk 398 00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:43,600 Speaker 3: about it? And he goes, well, I didn't want the 399 00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,840 Speaker 3: moment meeting my son ruined. 400 00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:53,520 Speaker 1: By fair fair enough the squeaky wheel gets the oil. 401 00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:53,840 Speaker 4: I know. 402 00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:56,480 Speaker 1: It reminds me remember that old panle adder. It was like, 403 00:18:56,520 --> 00:18:59,399 Speaker 1: I can't play headache. Don't play with a headache. It's like, 404 00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:01,800 Speaker 1: don't meet you keep it the head quick check if 405 00:19:01,840 --> 00:19:02,520 Speaker 1: dad's okay. 406 00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:06,120 Speaker 3: First, did they give him one or they actually did? 407 00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:10,640 Speaker 3: And then she's like, here'ship panadole. Mate. She's like, I'm 408 00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:13,960 Speaker 3: not actually supposed to give you any panadle and he's like, oh, 409 00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:17,679 Speaker 3: thanks so much. And then I anyway, so I packed it. 410 00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:20,280 Speaker 3: When I was going to hospital with Bobby, I packed 411 00:19:20,320 --> 00:19:21,399 Speaker 3: him some panadol. 412 00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:23,280 Speaker 1: Just in case, good good, good good, we can't give you. 413 00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:27,280 Speaker 1: And it just give me the green whistle through this. 414 00:19:27,760 --> 00:19:31,760 Speaker 1: It's painful, and you're like, that's bad. You just keep 415 00:19:31,760 --> 00:19:32,560 Speaker 1: your mouth shut. 416 00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:35,320 Speaker 3: JORDI, I tell you what my brother did do. My 417 00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:38,240 Speaker 3: little brother actually was staying with me. I don't remember 418 00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:40,840 Speaker 3: when my brother was there, and I was talking about 419 00:19:40,840 --> 00:19:42,960 Speaker 3: my birth blah blah blah. Anyway, I was in so 420 00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:46,840 Speaker 3: much pain. Obviously, baby just came out. And my little 421 00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:49,679 Speaker 3: brother asked me, but you had an epidural, so it 422 00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:54,800 Speaker 3: doesn't really count, does it? 423 00:19:54,840 --> 00:19:55,720 Speaker 1: No longer your brother? 424 00:19:57,080 --> 00:19:59,359 Speaker 3: And I was like mate, and yeah, but you know 425 00:19:59,400 --> 00:19:59,840 Speaker 3: what I mean. 426 00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:03,359 Speaker 1: And I'm like, no, I don't know. I don't know 427 00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:05,760 Speaker 1: what you know. It's like he's had one before. 428 00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:07,600 Speaker 3: It's exactly like. 429 00:20:09,920 --> 00:20:12,800 Speaker 4: The list of things not to say to one that's 430 00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:14,560 Speaker 4: just had a baby that's a cracker. 431 00:20:16,000 --> 00:20:17,840 Speaker 1: After after the birth of. 432 00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:21,199 Speaker 4: You first, what was motherhood like in the say, the 433 00:20:21,280 --> 00:20:22,760 Speaker 4: first first. 434 00:20:22,520 --> 00:20:23,560 Speaker 1: Grasp at motherhood. 435 00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:26,520 Speaker 3: I mean, I struggled breastfeeding. I've been very open with that, 436 00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:30,560 Speaker 3: and I found that the first time around with Teddy, 437 00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:37,200 Speaker 3: I found that really difficult, just the opinions and the 438 00:20:37,240 --> 00:20:41,880 Speaker 3: pressure to do everything perfectly. I found that really really 439 00:20:41,880 --> 00:20:45,040 Speaker 3: difficult in terms of my connection with my baby. I 440 00:20:45,080 --> 00:20:48,520 Speaker 3: loved becoming a mom. I love babies. I just I 441 00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:50,760 Speaker 3: absolutely loved it. And I was like, you know, that 442 00:20:50,880 --> 00:20:54,520 Speaker 3: was worth a hallish pregnancy. Yeah, I was so grateful 443 00:20:54,560 --> 00:20:57,280 Speaker 3: to have a healthy baby, and like just the gratitude 444 00:20:57,280 --> 00:20:59,639 Speaker 3: as well to go feel he's here and he's healthy, 445 00:20:59,680 --> 00:21:02,680 Speaker 3: because I spend nine months freaking out obviously. 446 00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:06,200 Speaker 4: And then you had the like you can imagine, like 447 00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:07,960 Speaker 4: like you're saying, and I felt it when you said, 448 00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:10,320 Speaker 4: you're like, I was just so happy he came out, 449 00:21:10,320 --> 00:21:11,280 Speaker 4: he was happy and healthy. 450 00:21:11,359 --> 00:21:15,080 Speaker 3: Oh man, like that feeling. Yes, So I really really 451 00:21:15,119 --> 00:21:18,840 Speaker 3: genuinely loved it. Just overwhelming joy. But the pressure of 452 00:21:19,320 --> 00:21:22,639 Speaker 3: every and like midwife's coming to your house and being like, 453 00:21:22,680 --> 00:21:24,399 Speaker 3: oh are you doing this? So how much is and 454 00:21:24,640 --> 00:21:27,960 Speaker 3: so much noise and opinions. I found that really difficult. 455 00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:31,400 Speaker 3: And you know, as a I think I'm naturally can 456 00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:33,960 Speaker 3: be quite an anxious person, so like that just plays 457 00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:36,360 Speaker 3: on your anxiety, going oh, yeah, like I think I'm 458 00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:38,760 Speaker 3: doing a good job, but everyone's telling me i'm not, 459 00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:40,919 Speaker 3: you know, like all telling me how I can do 460 00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:43,600 Speaker 3: it better, and you just I don't know. I think 461 00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:46,480 Speaker 3: it was really different the second time round. I was 462 00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:48,800 Speaker 3: so much more relaxed because I was just like Lah 463 00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:51,240 Speaker 3: and I struggled breastfeeding again with Bobby, and I was 464 00:21:51,280 --> 00:21:53,840 Speaker 3: just like, whatever, he's a bottle, Like he's so happy 465 00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:56,560 Speaker 3: and beautiful, Like that's all you, that's all you. All 466 00:21:56,600 --> 00:21:58,600 Speaker 3: I can wish for, you know, And he's so healthy 467 00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:02,440 Speaker 3: and beautiful. And I'm like mottlsh model, like you know whatever, 468 00:22:02,960 --> 00:22:05,919 Speaker 3: I always say to mums and parents anyone. I'm just like, 469 00:22:06,080 --> 00:22:09,600 Speaker 3: do whatever you have to do to get by the. 470 00:22:10,119 --> 00:22:11,280 Speaker 1: Path of least resistance. 471 00:22:11,359 --> 00:22:13,120 Speaker 4: Yeah, and people fall into like you were saying, there's 472 00:22:13,560 --> 00:22:16,080 Speaker 4: other voices and stuff. I'm thinking back to my first 473 00:22:16,119 --> 00:22:18,479 Speaker 4: and April being like, look where we're at, like all 474 00:22:18,520 --> 00:22:20,800 Speaker 4: the time, how big he is, And then when the 475 00:22:20,800 --> 00:22:21,600 Speaker 4: second one, you're like. 476 00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:24,959 Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know how many weeks I am like 477 00:22:25,080 --> 00:22:27,840 Speaker 3: it was really And also you're looking after a toddler 478 00:22:27,840 --> 00:22:30,160 Speaker 3: as well, so you just don't have it went quite 479 00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:34,080 Speaker 3: fast considering because you're chasing after a toddler, I don't 480 00:22:34,119 --> 00:22:35,760 Speaker 3: have time to know physicized of a p or what. 481 00:22:38,080 --> 00:22:40,840 Speaker 3: But yeah, I found it so much easier the second time, 482 00:22:40,920 --> 00:22:44,120 Speaker 3: and even like dealing with two people always like how 483 00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:47,160 Speaker 3: is it and I'm like, yeah, I really like it. 484 00:22:47,160 --> 00:22:50,480 Speaker 3: It's like there's obviously challenges, for sure, but I think, 485 00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:54,240 Speaker 3: you know, I'm much more comfortable in my parenting and 486 00:22:54,280 --> 00:22:58,199 Speaker 3: who I am as a mom and things that I 487 00:22:58,240 --> 00:23:01,160 Speaker 3: don't quite get right or my bad days. I'm more 488 00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:02,639 Speaker 3: forgiving to myself. I think. 489 00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:05,480 Speaker 4: Yeah, mums, especially new mums, and we've spoken to a 490 00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:07,439 Speaker 4: lot of them, they put so much pressure on themselves 491 00:23:07,480 --> 00:23:09,480 Speaker 4: to be able to do the job perfectly straight away. 492 00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:11,040 Speaker 4: And we always say it's like the first day on 493 00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:13,280 Speaker 4: a new job, right, and then when you do, and 494 00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:15,439 Speaker 4: even as dad, it's like when we have our second 495 00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:19,480 Speaker 4: I felt more relaxed, did you Oh yeah, yeah, I 496 00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:22,119 Speaker 4: kind of feel like, you know what I'm doing, but 497 00:23:22,280 --> 00:23:23,520 Speaker 4: something there will. 498 00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:26,320 Speaker 1: Help me figure it out. Yeah, it's going to be okay. Yeah, yeah, 499 00:23:26,359 --> 00:23:28,320 Speaker 1: second time on the roller coaster, you know what the 500 00:23:28,320 --> 00:23:30,080 Speaker 1: twists and turns are going to be. To an extent, 501 00:23:31,040 --> 00:23:34,600 Speaker 1: you've always been really vocal about your struggles with anxiety 502 00:23:34,760 --> 00:23:38,679 Speaker 1: and mental health. There is no situation that is a 503 00:23:38,720 --> 00:23:42,679 Speaker 1: greater emotional roller coaster. Roller coaster analogies like Scared the 504 00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:48,480 Speaker 1: theme there is a wild ride those part of it. 505 00:23:48,480 --> 00:23:51,440 Speaker 1: It's tumultuous, for your emotions, Like it's fucking wild. Even 506 00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:55,800 Speaker 1: for people going into childbirth mum or dad that have 507 00:23:55,920 --> 00:23:58,920 Speaker 1: great mental health, it can really throw them. So how 508 00:23:58,920 --> 00:24:00,560 Speaker 1: did you make sure that you're on top of your 509 00:24:00,560 --> 00:24:01,840 Speaker 1: mental health postpartum? 510 00:24:01,880 --> 00:24:05,480 Speaker 3: I made sure that I saw a psychologist beforehand, Like 511 00:24:05,560 --> 00:24:09,000 Speaker 3: during my pregnancy, I went and saw a psychologist because 512 00:24:09,119 --> 00:24:11,840 Speaker 3: I was really nervous about that. And I was just like, 513 00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:16,480 Speaker 3: I've had depressive episodes throughout my whole life, and there's 514 00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:19,639 Speaker 3: hormones and there's all sorts of things happening change, and 515 00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:22,359 Speaker 3: so I went and saw a psychologist beforehand, and just 516 00:24:22,640 --> 00:24:25,240 Speaker 3: to make sure that I was healthiest version of myself 517 00:24:25,280 --> 00:24:28,360 Speaker 3: mentally going into this. And also she gave me lots 518 00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:32,639 Speaker 3: of tips and advice on how to navigate through motherhood. 519 00:24:33,440 --> 00:24:36,679 Speaker 3: And she said, one of the things that I always 520 00:24:36,680 --> 00:24:38,639 Speaker 3: think about, and I always remind my sister as well, 521 00:24:38,680 --> 00:24:41,080 Speaker 3: because we're always chatting about this sort of stuff. She's 522 00:24:41,080 --> 00:24:44,720 Speaker 3: got girls older eleven and seven. The most important thing 523 00:24:44,760 --> 00:24:48,959 Speaker 3: you can do as a parent, even if you make mistakes. 524 00:24:49,000 --> 00:24:51,280 Speaker 3: You can make mistakes, you can lose your temper, you 525 00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:54,840 Speaker 3: can you know, have a bad parenting day. She's like, 526 00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:58,720 Speaker 3: repair is the most important thing for healthy foundations for 527 00:24:58,760 --> 00:25:02,720 Speaker 3: your children and your relationship to create secure attachment style. 528 00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:06,560 Speaker 3: So she's like, if you be accountable, if you say 529 00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:10,480 Speaker 3: sorry and repair that, it's that's the greatest gift you 530 00:25:10,480 --> 00:25:13,120 Speaker 3: can give your child. And I thought that was really refreshing. 531 00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:16,800 Speaker 3: So days that I do have, you know, a shorter 532 00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:20,520 Speaker 3: you know, I get frustrated or I'm like snap, or 533 00:25:20,560 --> 00:25:23,679 Speaker 3: I'm just like, you know, just like ah, you know 534 00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:26,040 Speaker 3: those days when you're just like getting pulled in every direction. 535 00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:30,000 Speaker 3: I just think it was just a bad moment. I say, so, 536 00:25:30,119 --> 00:25:32,880 Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm really sorry, I you know, and I 537 00:25:32,920 --> 00:25:35,240 Speaker 3: make sure I repair that and then I think, okay, 538 00:25:35,320 --> 00:25:38,359 Speaker 3: then we just reset and we start again. And there's 539 00:25:38,359 --> 00:25:40,040 Speaker 3: always going to be days. There's going to be there's 540 00:25:40,119 --> 00:25:42,680 Speaker 3: days where I think that, you know, I'm like, man, 541 00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:49,840 Speaker 3: I really nailed it, you know, minimal screen time, healthy food, calm, fun. Yeah, 542 00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:53,399 Speaker 3: I'm like, look at me. But then other days I'm like, 543 00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:56,679 Speaker 3: there's Bluie, here's some mcdonal's chips, and like, you know, 544 00:25:57,080 --> 00:25:58,920 Speaker 3: you just you have good days and bad days, and 545 00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:00,960 Speaker 3: I think we just need to be under to ourselves 546 00:26:01,320 --> 00:26:03,760 Speaker 3: when we have those moments where we're not our best 547 00:26:03,760 --> 00:26:06,240 Speaker 3: and just be forgiving to ourselves and try. 548 00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:06,560 Speaker 1: To repair that. 549 00:26:06,680 --> 00:26:09,800 Speaker 4: Yeah, the repair things super important, and like, yeah, I 550 00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:11,639 Speaker 4: feel like sometimes when you have those bad days and 551 00:26:11,640 --> 00:26:13,640 Speaker 4: you don't address it before they go sleep, I feel 552 00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:16,320 Speaker 4: so bad, oh man, because like also as well, they're 553 00:26:16,359 --> 00:26:19,600 Speaker 4: looking at you going, okay, well, if you're not willing 554 00:26:19,640 --> 00:26:21,680 Speaker 4: to repair this with me somewhere, then I'm not willing 555 00:26:21,800 --> 00:26:24,159 Speaker 4: to repair my behavior with whoever else I'm dealing with 556 00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:24,800 Speaker 4: down the track. 557 00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:28,080 Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, I suck at saying sorry. But even sometimes 558 00:26:28,119 --> 00:26:30,280 Speaker 1: when I'm trying to get Marley, she's very defined at 559 00:26:30,280 --> 00:26:31,960 Speaker 1: the moment, so whenever I ask her to do anything, 560 00:26:31,960 --> 00:26:34,359 Speaker 1: it's always like in a moment. Sometimes getting out of 561 00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:40,080 Speaker 1: the bath, I'm like, I'm gonna fucking grab that sounds 562 00:26:42,760 --> 00:26:45,760 Speaker 1: I'm on her shoulder, but I'm like, instead of trying 563 00:26:45,800 --> 00:26:47,320 Speaker 1: to coax her out of the bath, I'm like, I'm 564 00:26:47,359 --> 00:26:48,919 Speaker 1: just going to grab her, wrap on a towel and 565 00:26:49,080 --> 00:26:51,919 Speaker 1: take your upstairs to get a change. And sometimes she's like, 566 00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:54,159 Speaker 1: oh that was like Daddy, you like you've spoken an 567 00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:58,159 Speaker 1: angry voice, and I'm like, I'm sorry, yeah, I should 568 00:26:58,160 --> 00:27:00,439 Speaker 1: have got angry. And it's wild how much of a 569 00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:03,440 Speaker 1: difference it makes, and watching them hear those words coming 570 00:27:03,440 --> 00:27:04,400 Speaker 1: from a parent. 571 00:27:04,880 --> 00:27:07,159 Speaker 4: And like telling them why you're sorry too, Like I 572 00:27:07,200 --> 00:27:09,320 Speaker 4: felt like, yeah, I feel if I don't do that, 573 00:27:09,359 --> 00:27:11,880 Speaker 4: I feel like I've loved it, and yeah, I. 574 00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:15,040 Speaker 3: Think it's so important. And even from like Ted's only two, 575 00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:18,960 Speaker 3: but I'm constantly like if I like am short with 576 00:27:19,040 --> 00:27:21,880 Speaker 3: him and I'm just like, I think it's so important, 577 00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:24,359 Speaker 3: and even with him, I'll be like, I'm so sorry, 578 00:27:24,600 --> 00:27:26,920 Speaker 3: he's actually very cute. I'm like, that was mummy's fault. 579 00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:28,800 Speaker 3: I really shouldn't have spoken to you that. I'm just 580 00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:31,640 Speaker 3: feeling I'm just really tired at the moment, really sorry, 581 00:27:31,800 --> 00:27:42,080 Speaker 3: And he will go, that's mummy's fault. It's funny, It's 582 00:27:42,119 --> 00:27:43,560 Speaker 3: really funny, and I'm like, yeah, night. 583 00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:47,760 Speaker 1: It was when you talk about the early days of 584 00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:50,880 Speaker 1: the pressure that you were feeling and like that build 585 00:27:50,960 --> 00:27:55,280 Speaker 1: up of anxiety. Is there any situations where your support network, 586 00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:57,960 Speaker 1: your friends, or your family were really helping you through 587 00:27:58,000 --> 00:27:58,600 Speaker 1: those moments? 588 00:27:58,760 --> 00:28:01,399 Speaker 3: Oh? Yeah, I mean, you know, throughout my entire life, 589 00:28:01,480 --> 00:28:05,600 Speaker 3: I have been so blessed with beautiful friends. I've got 590 00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:10,520 Speaker 3: so many great friends and family. They're my biggest supporters. 591 00:28:10,520 --> 00:28:12,960 Speaker 3: They're honestly yeah, I mean I don't think I could 592 00:28:13,000 --> 00:28:15,880 Speaker 3: do anything without their support. They're just so loving and 593 00:28:16,640 --> 00:28:19,480 Speaker 3: they're always there to listen. And I've one of my 594 00:28:19,520 --> 00:28:21,960 Speaker 3: best girlfriends she's in Melbourne, and I would just send 595 00:28:21,960 --> 00:28:24,400 Speaker 3: her a voice note being like, oh my god, I'm 596 00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:28,680 Speaker 3: going to have a mental breakdown. She's like, go outside, 597 00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:32,760 Speaker 3: and I'm like, okay, help anyway. And it's really refreshing 598 00:28:32,840 --> 00:28:36,800 Speaker 3: having friends that don't judge you, that just go mate 599 00:28:37,520 --> 00:28:38,640 Speaker 3: it's a bad day. 600 00:28:38,760 --> 00:28:41,320 Speaker 1: It might be really obvious, but if there are people 601 00:28:41,360 --> 00:28:44,160 Speaker 1: listening where they know that a mum or dad has 602 00:28:44,160 --> 00:28:46,400 Speaker 1: struggled in the past with mental health and they're finding 603 00:28:46,400 --> 00:28:50,440 Speaker 1: it tough with a newborn or their child, if they 604 00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:53,040 Speaker 1: reach out to them with their problems, like you said, 605 00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:55,120 Speaker 1: listening with no judgment. Is there any other advice you 606 00:28:55,160 --> 00:28:57,880 Speaker 1: can give of how people can better support when someone 607 00:28:57,960 --> 00:28:59,600 Speaker 1: is reaching out with their problems. 608 00:28:59,280 --> 00:29:03,200 Speaker 3: Listening with that judgment one hundred percent. Also just allowing 609 00:29:04,240 --> 00:29:08,080 Speaker 3: people to feel safe to talk, for women especially, I mean, 610 00:29:08,160 --> 00:29:11,040 Speaker 3: women work through their problems by talking about it. That's 611 00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:14,320 Speaker 3: just about how our brains work. So certainly like providing 612 00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:17,840 Speaker 3: space to be there to listen to support also if 613 00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:20,640 Speaker 3: you can, Like my sister will come over and she 614 00:29:20,720 --> 00:29:23,040 Speaker 3: will just like sit with me and just be I 615 00:29:23,120 --> 00:29:25,600 Speaker 3: just think it's the presence of people all the difference. 616 00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:29,240 Speaker 4: It's hard to like open up if there's the fear 617 00:29:29,280 --> 00:29:32,080 Speaker 4: of being judged about how you're actually feeling, and that's 618 00:29:32,360 --> 00:29:34,760 Speaker 4: probably a really big reason a lot of people don't, 619 00:29:34,760 --> 00:29:37,280 Speaker 4: so they definitely should do that. So it's pretty powerful. 620 00:29:37,520 --> 00:29:39,120 Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, especially men. 621 00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:43,360 Speaker 1: Now, I've got to say, you look fucking amazing for someone. 622 00:29:43,200 --> 00:29:53,800 Speaker 6: Who's I was just gonna ask and say that is 623 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:55,120 Speaker 6: so lovely. 624 00:29:57,080 --> 00:30:00,760 Speaker 3: I had a shower and make up on. That's the 625 00:30:00,800 --> 00:30:03,600 Speaker 3: trick that he's so lovely. It's actually been three months, so. 626 00:30:03,720 --> 00:30:04,960 Speaker 2: Oh god, I know that. 627 00:30:05,560 --> 00:30:07,440 Speaker 4: How are you going with with I mean, you've got 628 00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:09,440 Speaker 4: a toddler and a three month old? 629 00:30:09,600 --> 00:30:11,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, how's that? How's that going? 630 00:30:11,480 --> 00:30:14,120 Speaker 3: Oh man? I love it so much, I really do. 631 00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:17,080 Speaker 3: I think, like, I mean, there's obviously testing times, but 632 00:30:17,600 --> 00:30:19,720 Speaker 3: you know, I think Ted's at a really funny age. 633 00:30:19,720 --> 00:30:23,120 Speaker 3: He's too, and it is so fun. It's hilarious because 634 00:30:23,160 --> 00:30:26,400 Speaker 3: you see the good parts of yourself as well, and 635 00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:28,640 Speaker 3: you also see that not so great parts about yourself. 636 00:30:28,640 --> 00:30:31,400 Speaker 3: And you're like, oh, he's copying me. That sounds exactly 637 00:30:31,480 --> 00:30:33,680 Speaker 3: like me. Yeah, he's got this bit of attitude and 638 00:30:33,760 --> 00:30:36,320 Speaker 3: he'll go I'll be like, Ted, come on, scrabower, and 639 00:30:36,320 --> 00:30:41,200 Speaker 3: he goes, hang on, oh yeah, and I heard my 640 00:30:41,360 --> 00:30:43,640 Speaker 3: own voice echoed back, and I was like in this 641 00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:46,160 Speaker 3: small child and I was like, oh, yeah, you just 642 00:30:46,160 --> 00:30:47,520 Speaker 3: want to catch yourself going. 643 00:30:47,680 --> 00:30:50,760 Speaker 4: It's funny they pick up on like my son would 644 00:30:50,760 --> 00:30:53,960 Speaker 4: pick up how April swears and not how I swear, 645 00:30:54,000 --> 00:30:55,880 Speaker 4: and I'd be like, that's you. 646 00:30:55,880 --> 00:30:56,400 Speaker 1: You did that. 647 00:30:56,640 --> 00:31:01,680 Speaker 3: I have to tell you, my beautiful, precious head. I 648 00:31:02,480 --> 00:31:04,440 Speaker 3: couldn't talk about my son forever and ever and ever. 649 00:31:04,480 --> 00:31:06,080 Speaker 3: He's the best and I love him so much. He's 650 00:31:06,120 --> 00:31:10,280 Speaker 3: a very gentle, sweet angel. He's so sweet. It's like 651 00:31:10,720 --> 00:31:12,120 Speaker 3: he's too pure for this world. 652 00:31:11,960 --> 00:31:12,720 Speaker 1: Is what I always think. 653 00:31:13,480 --> 00:31:18,440 Speaker 3: Anyway, It's very funny when the very first time he 654 00:31:18,520 --> 00:31:20,720 Speaker 3: caught me off guard, he said to me, He's like, Mama, 655 00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:22,160 Speaker 3: come here, and I was. 656 00:31:22,200 --> 00:31:24,000 Speaker 1: Like, okay, lovely. 657 00:31:24,200 --> 00:31:26,960 Speaker 3: Yeah, So like Toddleday between me and my lent down 658 00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:28,960 Speaker 3: and he leans into me and I think he's going 659 00:31:29,040 --> 00:31:31,360 Speaker 3: to give me a kiss, and I'm like, oh honey, 660 00:31:31,840 --> 00:31:33,480 Speaker 3: and he goes, fux sake. 661 00:31:35,440 --> 00:31:39,560 Speaker 1: It's always fox sake. It's always and that's you, right. 662 00:31:39,440 --> 00:31:39,840 Speaker 3: That's. 663 00:31:41,480 --> 00:31:44,960 Speaker 5: Just like he looks straight at me, he goes, that's you, 664 00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:47,240 Speaker 5: and I'm like, I got and I was like, maybe 665 00:31:47,240 --> 00:31:49,600 Speaker 5: you didn't say that, like and then like every time 666 00:31:49,720 --> 00:31:53,240 Speaker 5: he loves cars, like and so his truck trailer it 667 00:31:53,280 --> 00:31:55,560 Speaker 5: always falls off his robes and fu sake. 668 00:31:58,360 --> 00:32:00,520 Speaker 1: At least he's using it in the right car text. 669 00:32:00,640 --> 00:32:01,680 Speaker 3: I know. I'm so proud of him. 670 00:32:01,680 --> 00:32:04,080 Speaker 1: It's a weird situation. 671 00:32:04,480 --> 00:32:06,920 Speaker 4: Boy, it's a weird situation as a parent when they're 672 00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:09,160 Speaker 4: like they do something like that that you're kind of 673 00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:11,480 Speaker 4: proud and it's funny, but you can't show those emotions 674 00:32:11,480 --> 00:32:12,240 Speaker 4: because you don't think. 675 00:32:12,080 --> 00:32:15,280 Speaker 1: It's and that Like the kid, if I've laughed. 676 00:32:14,920 --> 00:32:17,040 Speaker 4: At things my kids have said and then they thought 677 00:32:17,040 --> 00:32:19,840 Speaker 4: I'm allowed to do this, and they keep going, it's. 678 00:32:19,680 --> 00:32:23,160 Speaker 3: Like, well, yeah, we've tried. I haven't addressed it. I'm like, 679 00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:25,760 Speaker 3: don't address it. Because even little things like we say 680 00:32:26,080 --> 00:32:28,479 Speaker 3: to Ted, stop driving cars on your brother's head, like 681 00:32:28,520 --> 00:32:30,760 Speaker 3: things like that. I say that about four times a 682 00:32:30,840 --> 00:32:32,720 Speaker 3: day because he always drives his cars on his head. 683 00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:36,160 Speaker 1: And he's like, it's good. It's a perfect peal. 684 00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:40,120 Speaker 3: Right, And because I say don't do that, of course 685 00:32:40,400 --> 00:32:42,440 Speaker 3: that's all he ever does. And so I'm like, I 686 00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:43,240 Speaker 3: don't address to. 687 00:32:43,200 --> 00:32:47,360 Speaker 1: Swearing, and you're like, drive on your brother's head. You 688 00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:48,160 Speaker 1: can swear all. 689 00:32:49,320 --> 00:32:50,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like you got to do a bit of 690 00:32:50,560 --> 00:32:53,000 Speaker 3: a best psychology. It's like trying to like, do you 691 00:32:53,080 --> 00:32:55,120 Speaker 3: kung food trick them into like doing the things that 692 00:32:55,160 --> 00:32:57,080 Speaker 3: they're supposed to be doing. But yeah, anyway, I have 693 00:32:57,120 --> 00:32:59,640 Speaker 3: to be really mindful of it. 694 00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:02,040 Speaker 1: I've given up. I'm we even watching my language now. 695 00:33:02,240 --> 00:33:04,520 Speaker 1: I just like, whatever they know it's bad, they can 696 00:33:04,560 --> 00:33:07,240 Speaker 1: say it. I don't even care. Oh that's a refreshing 697 00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:10,240 Speaker 1: When I call Ash in the car and it don't speaker, 698 00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:13,600 Speaker 1: my kids are like, there's not the one. I can't. 699 00:33:13,680 --> 00:33:16,920 Speaker 1: I just honestly, I've just given up. I think at one. 700 00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:20,840 Speaker 4: Point we were like, just let's just watch it as 701 00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:22,760 Speaker 4: parents do, which is I mean, it's right or wrong 702 00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:25,680 Speaker 4: thing to do whatever. And then I'm just like, I think, April, 703 00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:27,280 Speaker 4: we really just watch I swinging, and I'm like, you 704 00:33:27,280 --> 00:33:28,240 Speaker 4: know what, I'm gonna do the opposite. 705 00:33:28,280 --> 00:33:30,280 Speaker 1: I really couldn't give a shit anymore. I'm just gonna 706 00:33:30,720 --> 00:33:34,240 Speaker 1: got three kids. Yeah, we're just all swearing each other. 707 00:33:34,960 --> 00:33:35,960 Speaker 1: She's just as bad. 708 00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:39,680 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, like I because I've got a horror 709 00:33:39,840 --> 00:33:42,480 Speaker 3: like I'm the worst that swearing, Like I'm so bad 710 00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:44,760 Speaker 3: at it. I blame my brother's the truck driver. My 711 00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:47,760 Speaker 3: dad's a truck driver. Like it's just the truck drivers. 712 00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:50,160 Speaker 3: It's the truck country. You need to watch out for that. 713 00:33:50,280 --> 00:33:52,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, Avery's the drive truck. 714 00:33:53,160 --> 00:33:55,360 Speaker 3: So that's probably why. So I'm just like that's because 715 00:33:55,400 --> 00:33:57,840 Speaker 3: of them, and that's why. But you know, it's part. 716 00:33:57,640 --> 00:34:00,360 Speaker 1: Of your personality too, right, And I think I did 717 00:34:00,400 --> 00:34:03,440 Speaker 1: get a bit of feedback on the podcast, say Matt 718 00:34:03,520 --> 00:34:05,200 Speaker 1: swears too much, but I was. 719 00:34:05,200 --> 00:34:06,480 Speaker 3: Like, you, I swear too much him. 720 00:34:07,280 --> 00:34:09,920 Speaker 1: I don't know if you feel this at all, And 721 00:34:09,960 --> 00:34:11,800 Speaker 1: if you don't, you can be like that's just you, 722 00:34:11,880 --> 00:34:14,839 Speaker 1: big guy. But I always wanted to be a dad, 723 00:34:14,920 --> 00:34:17,239 Speaker 1: Like always were so excited. When I became a dad, 724 00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:19,799 Speaker 1: it was amazing. And that wind is just fucking. 725 00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:21,080 Speaker 3: Is that wind? That how I thought it was a 726 00:34:21,080 --> 00:34:21,720 Speaker 3: truck calling. 727 00:34:25,560 --> 00:34:28,640 Speaker 1: Very good. But I always wanted to be a dad, 728 00:34:28,719 --> 00:34:31,120 Speaker 1: And when I became a dad, I was like, this 729 00:34:31,200 --> 00:34:33,080 Speaker 1: is fucking great. I know it's cliche, but I was like, 730 00:34:33,239 --> 00:34:36,440 Speaker 1: this is amazing. I love it. And now that I'm 731 00:34:36,520 --> 00:34:38,920 Speaker 1: staring down the barrel of thirty eight, I think social 732 00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:42,560 Speaker 1: circles become a lot smaller, and I'm kind of I'm 733 00:34:42,600 --> 00:34:47,120 Speaker 1: more dad than I am my Matt before kids, maybe 734 00:34:47,120 --> 00:34:49,800 Speaker 1: I think with Marley and Lola was a bit even keel, 735 00:34:50,280 --> 00:34:54,200 Speaker 1: but now I'm becoming like ninety percent dad, and I 736 00:34:54,239 --> 00:34:56,800 Speaker 1: think I'm kind of having a bit of an identity crisis, 737 00:34:56,800 --> 00:34:58,360 Speaker 1: a bit where I'm like, oh, like, I want to 738 00:34:58,400 --> 00:35:01,360 Speaker 1: retain some of my youth. Do you love who you 739 00:35:01,400 --> 00:35:03,319 Speaker 1: are now as a mom? Do you try and hold 740 00:35:03,360 --> 00:35:05,040 Speaker 1: on to parts of your youth at all? 741 00:35:05,680 --> 00:35:09,200 Speaker 3: You know? I actually I was talking to my sister 742 00:35:09,239 --> 00:35:12,720 Speaker 3: about this. I think there are parts that I miss, 743 00:35:13,040 --> 00:35:15,719 Speaker 3: but the majority of it, I think I'm a far 744 00:35:15,840 --> 00:35:19,040 Speaker 3: better person now. I think I'm I think I think 745 00:35:19,080 --> 00:35:20,440 Speaker 3: back on who I was. I was like, man, I 746 00:35:20,480 --> 00:35:25,640 Speaker 3: was so selfish and yeah, and my sister, my sister 747 00:35:25,640 --> 00:35:27,760 Speaker 3: always says, she's like, you're the best version of yourself 748 00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:30,759 Speaker 3: now than you've ever been. You're the happiest, And I 749 00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:34,080 Speaker 3: think that's because I have a different relationship with my past, 750 00:35:34,840 --> 00:35:36,960 Speaker 3: and I'm actually trying to get better at it because 751 00:35:37,040 --> 00:35:40,759 Speaker 3: you often we always think about all the horrible things 752 00:35:40,760 --> 00:35:43,160 Speaker 3: we've done, you know, all like the selfish things or 753 00:35:43,200 --> 00:35:44,440 Speaker 3: the mistakes we made. 754 00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:45,280 Speaker 1: Right before I go to sleep. 755 00:35:45,800 --> 00:35:47,040 Speaker 3: Yeah, right, what is with that? 756 00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:47,759 Speaker 1: Every night? 757 00:35:47,960 --> 00:35:50,000 Speaker 3: I'm always like, why can't I think about all the 758 00:35:50,040 --> 00:35:51,040 Speaker 3: great things I've done? 759 00:35:51,080 --> 00:35:51,400 Speaker 1: Instead? 760 00:35:51,440 --> 00:35:56,359 Speaker 3: You're like, man, you're a real piece of shit. I'm like, 761 00:35:56,680 --> 00:35:59,520 Speaker 3: oh my god, yeah, I know, but I think I'm 762 00:35:59,600 --> 00:36:01,640 Speaker 3: I think I'm the best version of myself now. But 763 00:36:01,680 --> 00:36:05,319 Speaker 3: there are parts of me that like I miss. I 764 00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:08,680 Speaker 3: don't particularly work that much at the moment I'm solely 765 00:36:08,719 --> 00:36:14,319 Speaker 3: focused on, but like, there's the creative part of my 766 00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:18,359 Speaker 3: brain really wants to be creative, so I miss that. 767 00:36:18,719 --> 00:36:22,400 Speaker 3: But in terms of like I miss dancing. Actually I 768 00:36:22,440 --> 00:36:24,880 Speaker 3: really miss dancing with my friends because I was. I mean, 769 00:36:24,880 --> 00:36:26,719 Speaker 3: I'm not very good at it, but I really love it. 770 00:36:28,320 --> 00:36:38,440 Speaker 1: Play the track people comes on. I don't know, but there's. 771 00:36:38,280 --> 00:36:45,400 Speaker 3: Wrung with it, yeah, I mean sure, but yeah, there'sdaily 772 00:36:45,480 --> 00:36:47,680 Speaker 3: parts of myself that I missed. But all around, I 773 00:36:47,680 --> 00:36:49,000 Speaker 3: think I'm a far better person now. 774 00:36:49,360 --> 00:36:49,800 Speaker 2: I agree. 775 00:36:50,160 --> 00:36:53,160 Speaker 4: Yes, you sort of become like you do look back 776 00:36:53,160 --> 00:36:54,759 Speaker 4: and you go, oh, I was so selfish but that's 777 00:36:54,800 --> 00:36:56,520 Speaker 4: because you really just have to worry about yourself right 778 00:36:56,920 --> 00:36:59,520 Speaker 4: now that you've got kid multiple. 779 00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:01,439 Speaker 3: I'll tell you what I do. Miss I always say 780 00:37:01,440 --> 00:37:04,839 Speaker 3: to Jordi all the time, I was like, man, once 781 00:37:04,880 --> 00:37:13,440 Speaker 3: these abs come back, just got away. And I'll always 782 00:37:13,520 --> 00:37:20,759 Speaker 3: get like, really, dagonshots my son, Jordy, he goes. I's like, 783 00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:22,640 Speaker 3: and he goes. I have that for like three months, 784 00:37:22,680 --> 00:37:26,759 Speaker 3: and they're like, I feel you've been pregnant for about 785 00:37:26,760 --> 00:37:29,399 Speaker 3: one hundred years. But I'm like, don't you worry, it's 786 00:37:29,440 --> 00:37:30,040 Speaker 3: coming back. 787 00:37:30,560 --> 00:37:32,560 Speaker 1: When Christmas comes around, I will send you a tube 788 00:37:32,560 --> 00:37:39,920 Speaker 1: of protein to One question we always end on is 789 00:37:40,080 --> 00:37:42,919 Speaker 1: when Bobby and Teddy they've grown up, no longer living 790 00:37:42,920 --> 00:37:44,799 Speaker 1: at home, what's the one thing you want them to 791 00:37:44,800 --> 00:37:46,359 Speaker 1: remember about the house they grew up in. 792 00:37:46,480 --> 00:37:50,080 Speaker 3: Oh wow, that's a beautiful question. Makes me want to cry. 793 00:37:50,200 --> 00:37:53,680 Speaker 3: I often, I very often think about what kind of 794 00:37:53,760 --> 00:37:56,040 Speaker 3: legacy am I leaving for my boys? And you know 795 00:37:56,080 --> 00:37:58,160 Speaker 3: what's interesting, I'm not sure if you guys have felt 796 00:37:58,160 --> 00:38:01,680 Speaker 3: the same, but since becoming a parent, I've started to 797 00:38:02,080 --> 00:38:06,320 Speaker 3: think about mortality, and you think I often think about 798 00:38:06,320 --> 00:38:08,239 Speaker 3: that and I think far out I'm going to leave 799 00:38:08,360 --> 00:38:12,880 Speaker 3: this earth one day and I'm like, yeah, and I'm like, 800 00:38:13,080 --> 00:38:15,680 Speaker 3: what am I leaving behind? What type of person? I'm 801 00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:18,200 Speaker 3: very sentimental. I always write notes for my boys, like 802 00:38:18,560 --> 00:38:20,319 Speaker 3: even if there's a photo all right on the back, 803 00:38:20,440 --> 00:38:23,040 Speaker 3: something beautiful that I remember about that day because and 804 00:38:23,080 --> 00:38:24,680 Speaker 3: I think it's also because I lost my step dad 805 00:38:24,719 --> 00:38:27,480 Speaker 3: really suddenly, so I just think quite young, so I 806 00:38:27,520 --> 00:38:30,640 Speaker 3: think to know, whether you know, I just freak out 807 00:38:30,640 --> 00:38:34,360 Speaker 3: about that some of stuff. Even when I caught the plane, 808 00:38:34,360 --> 00:38:35,640 Speaker 3: I was like, if I die, I love you guys 809 00:38:35,719 --> 00:38:39,640 Speaker 3: so much. He's like, ha, You'll be fine. We love you. 810 00:38:41,760 --> 00:38:45,759 Speaker 3: I'm so weird about it, and like anyway, So yeah, 811 00:38:45,800 --> 00:38:48,160 Speaker 3: I often think about that, and I just hope they 812 00:38:48,680 --> 00:38:53,279 Speaker 3: always feel like I created a very loving home. I 813 00:38:53,320 --> 00:38:56,600 Speaker 3: always feel like they felt safe to be themselves. I 814 00:38:56,640 --> 00:38:59,600 Speaker 3: hope that they Yeah, I hope they feel like an 815 00:38:59,600 --> 00:39:02,359 Speaker 3: abundant it's of love and joy. I really truly feel 816 00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:04,839 Speaker 3: that in my core. And I always say that I'm 817 00:39:04,840 --> 00:39:06,080 Speaker 3: going to build a house at the back of our 818 00:39:06,120 --> 00:39:11,800 Speaker 3: house so they can never leave. Like, actually, do you 819 00:39:11,880 --> 00:39:13,960 Speaker 3: know what's very will quickly say. A very cute thing 820 00:39:13,960 --> 00:39:16,680 Speaker 3: that I do at the moment is I do positive affirmations. 821 00:39:16,719 --> 00:39:18,400 Speaker 3: With Ted, and he's so cute and little, and so 822 00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:20,600 Speaker 3: every day start saying and he goes, I am so smart. 823 00:39:20,680 --> 00:39:23,520 Speaker 3: I guess I'm so beautiful and caring and kind and 824 00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:26,160 Speaker 3: his little cute voice and he's sort of and it's like, 825 00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:29,160 Speaker 3: so cute. I just hope that my boys know how 826 00:39:29,280 --> 00:39:32,040 Speaker 3: loved they are and how capable they are, and like, 827 00:39:32,120 --> 00:39:33,440 Speaker 3: I just think they're the best things in the whole 828 00:39:33,560 --> 00:39:35,480 Speaker 3: entire world, and they've made my life so much better. 829 00:39:35,719 --> 00:39:38,080 Speaker 1: Great answer. It was a beautiful answer. And this is 830 00:39:38,120 --> 00:39:40,360 Speaker 1: going to sound woo woo to bear with me, but 831 00:39:40,480 --> 00:39:43,879 Speaker 1: you are someone who like radiates warmth. I'm like, those 832 00:39:43,920 --> 00:39:45,440 Speaker 1: boys are so lucky to have you as a master, 833 00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:47,680 Speaker 1: and Jeordie is very lucky to have you as a wife, 834 00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:49,920 Speaker 1: and we'd be very lucky to have you on the podcast. 835 00:39:52,480 --> 00:39:59,120 Speaker 3: That is so good. I really appreciate it. Thank you 836 00:39:59,160 --> 00:39:59,560 Speaker 3: so much. 837 00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:02,280 Speaker 1: Good luck. By the way, with the we spot before 838 00:40:02,440 --> 00:40:04,920 Speaker 1: we started recording, you're steering down the barrel. 839 00:40:04,680 --> 00:40:08,319 Speaker 3: At six months six months, Yeah of course, yeah, yeah, 840 00:40:08,360 --> 00:40:10,040 Speaker 3: six months in the caravan. We're going to set off 841 00:40:10,280 --> 00:40:15,040 Speaker 3: in about a month. You know, fun, it'll be very fun, 842 00:40:15,080 --> 00:40:17,440 Speaker 3: but like you know, close quarters, so we'll have to. 843 00:40:18,320 --> 00:40:25,680 Speaker 1: We'll keep it close eye you travel contents on seven 844 00:40:25,800 --> 00:40:27,279 Speaker 1: Is it seven mate? Yeah, yeah you can. 845 00:40:27,520 --> 00:40:29,719 Speaker 3: We've got a tally show Jordy seven tenths event. You 846 00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:31,240 Speaker 3: can stream it on seven plus. 847 00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:34,800 Speaker 1: So yeah awesome, I love it. Thank you so much, pleasure, 848 00:40:35,080 --> 00:40:42,040 Speaker 1: thanks so much. Avin As Before we go, we have 849 00:40:42,120 --> 00:40:45,800 Speaker 1: to tell the listeners something very important. In fact, you 850 00:40:45,840 --> 00:40:49,480 Speaker 1: could argue that this isn't just a request, it is 851 00:40:49,600 --> 00:40:54,240 Speaker 1: a land I think I want to say it straight 852 00:40:54,280 --> 00:40:56,520 Speaker 1: to it. Okay, we need you, if you're listening right now, 853 00:40:56,960 --> 00:41:00,239 Speaker 1: to please give us a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify, 854 00:41:00,360 --> 00:41:03,319 Speaker 1: because these are the reviews that are the fuel that 855 00:41:03,480 --> 00:41:07,520 Speaker 1: keeps us going after two very long years. Without these reviews, 856 00:41:07,640 --> 00:41:09,440 Speaker 1: we would dry up. It would be nothing. We will 857 00:41:09,480 --> 00:41:10,520 Speaker 1: be simply dust. 858 00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:12,760 Speaker 4: We would Oh you could join us on social media. 859 00:41:12,800 --> 00:41:17,279 Speaker 4: Two Doting Dad's Instagram, TikTok Facebook. We look forward to 860 00:41:17,280 --> 00:41:20,320 Speaker 4: seeing you in all three areas of the Internet because 861 00:41:20,360 --> 00:41:22,319 Speaker 4: we're there waiting. Goodbye, join us. 862 00:41:22,600 --> 00:41:33,200 Speaker 1: Bye. Two Doting Dads Podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of 863 00:41:33,239 --> 00:41:37,360 Speaker 1: country throughout Australia and the connections to land, see and community. 864 00:41:37,600 --> 00:41:40,120 Speaker 4: We pay our respects to their elders past and present, 865 00:41:40,160 --> 00:41:43,240 Speaker 4: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Islander 866 00:41:43,280 --> 00:41:44,040 Speaker 4: people's today,