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Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast.

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Speaker 2: It's the podcast for the time poor parent who just

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Speaker 2: once answers.

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Speaker 1: Now, welcome to a new week. It's so good to

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Speaker 1: have you joining us on a Happy Families podcast. Last

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Speaker 1: week we got a bit carried away. I had six

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Speaker 1: stories lined up for this week. You're not joining me.

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Speaker 2: This week in parenting.

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Speaker 1: Ah, that is so cheesy. I can't believe we're doing

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Speaker 1: this this week and parenting it's one of my favorite

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Speaker 1: episodes of the podcast. And Kylie, I really thought we'd

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Speaker 1: get through six stories last week. You're shaking your head

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Speaker 1: as you look at me.

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Speaker 2: This is my life.

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Speaker 1: I've always had two rules for life. I mean I

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Speaker 1: was asked what my life philosophy was years and years

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Speaker 1: and years ago, and I said, you have two things.

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Speaker 1: Number one, always bought off more than you can chew,

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Speaker 1: and number two, make it up as you go along.

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Speaker 1: I think it served as reasonably well, you have less

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Speaker 1: to say on this than I do. So last week

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Speaker 1: we bid off more than we could chew, and today

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Speaker 1: we're continuing to make it up as we go along

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Speaker 1: because I bid off more than we could chew. Kylie.

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Speaker 1: The three stories that we covered off last week were

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Speaker 1: really valuable, really really curious, and I think get people talking.

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Speaker 1: We talked about robeblocks and the hellscape that it's created

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Speaker 1: for kids because it allows pedophiles in and allows them

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Speaker 1: to contact kids on mass. We also talked about how

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Speaker 1: parenting is bad for your health according to the US

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Speaker 1: Surgeon General, doctor vi VC Murphy, and meta passing the

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Speaker 1: buck when it comes to who's responsible for keeping kids

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Speaker 1: safe online. You can go back and have listened to

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Speaker 1: that episode from last Thursday. However, today we have the

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Speaker 1: other three stories and you can guide us through them

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Speaker 1: because I am going to get carried away, but I

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Speaker 1: think you'll have something to say about these ones as well.

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Speaker 1: So let's go. Where do you want to start?

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Speaker 2: There was an article recently published in the Forbes magazine

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Speaker 2: suggested that there is a correlation between smartphone news and

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Speaker 2: anxiety in our right.

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Speaker 1: But here's the fascinating thing the research. Twenty twenty research

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Speaker 1: study from Pure Research showed that sixty a percent of

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Speaker 1: American parents with a child younger than seventeen years of

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Speaker 1: age so that their smartphones routinely distract them during interactions

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Speaker 1: with their children. Here's what this new research says, And

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Speaker 1: by the way, do you want to congratulate me on

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Speaker 1: getting some doctor's desk material into this weekend parenting. Do

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Speaker 1: you like that? Yes, so sneaking it. In new research

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Speaker 1: the jamm At network open journal, researchers Sherry Madigan of

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Speaker 1: the University of Calgary and her colleagues found this in

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Speaker 1: early childhood, parental techno farans that is, when parents run devices,

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Speaker 1: not kids. When parents run devices and it's interfering, technoference

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Speaker 1: is associated with decreases in parental child engagement, which is obvious, right,

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Speaker 1: I mean, University of Durr could have told you that.

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Speaker 1: But they found that reducibility to notice intended children's needs

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Speaker 1: less frequent, lower quality joint play and conversational turns, more

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Speaker 1: negative responses to children's behavior at higher risk of child

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Speaker 1: injury all occur when parents are on their devices too much.

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Speaker 1: They also added in adolescence, adolescent perceived parental technoference is

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Speaker 1: associated with higher levels of parent child conflict and lower

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Speaker 1: levels of parental emotional support. And in other words, when

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Speaker 1: we are on our devices that's causing problems. But this

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Speaker 1: is where this story really takes on a life of

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Speaker 1: its own. I think it's really important they went deeper

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Speaker 1: they recruited thirteen hundred emerging adults sorry adolescents aged nine

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Speaker 1: to eleven, and the mums and the kids were asked

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Speaker 1: to complete a series of questionnaires. Some of the questions

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Speaker 1: that the kids answered included, I wish my parents would

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Speaker 1: spend less time on their phone and other devices, and

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Speaker 1: I get frustrated with my parent for being on their

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Speaker 1: phone or other devices when we're spending time together. And

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Speaker 1: then the kids also self reported any symptoms they're experiencing

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Speaker 1: related to anxiety and depression and attention difficulties and hyperactivity.

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Speaker 1: And what the research found was this, when the children

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Speaker 1: perceived their parents were indulging in more techno feerence, those

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Speaker 1: kids experienced higher mental health difficulties.

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Speaker 2: So in the article, did it acknowledge anything outside of

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Speaker 2: anxiety or was anxiety the main focus?

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Speaker 1: Let let me give you a direct quote. They said,

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Speaker 1: techno ference is becoming a pervasive part of parent child interactions,

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Speaker 1: and a growing literature suggests that technology based interferences have

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Speaker 1: mental health ramifications. Higher levels of perceived parental techno feerence

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Speaker 1: were associated with higher levels of emerging adolescent inattention and

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Speaker 1: hyperactivity symptoms. In other words, the more you're on your phone,

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Speaker 1: the greater the possibility that your child will either be

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Speaker 1: inattative themselves or hyperactive. There were no gender differences. And

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Speaker 1: here's the other finding that really really I guess grabbed me.

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Speaker 1: Emerging adolescence with anxiety may also be more sensitive to

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Speaker 1: their parents' techno ference than emerging adolescence with lower levels

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Speaker 1: of anxiety, which means that if your kid is a

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Speaker 1: bit anxious and you're on your device, they're probably going

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Speaker 1: to perceive that there is more techno ference than there

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Speaker 1: actually is, and that's going to drive greater anxiety. I

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Speaker 1: think this is I just think it's one of those

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Speaker 1: one of those articles, one of those news stories. I

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Speaker 1: guess it's at doctor's desk as well. I did cheat

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Speaker 1: a little bit, but it's one of those things that

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Speaker 1: is supposed to make you stop and go. Can I

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Speaker 1: be more intentional when I'm using my device?

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Speaker 2: Well? I think that the reality is that we obviously

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Speaker 2: are all doing life for the most part the best

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Speaker 2: we can. I actually had our seventeen year old pull

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Speaker 2: me up the other day because she walked into the

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Speaker 2: house while I was in the middle of doing an

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Speaker 2: email at the table, and she said, hi, Mom, and

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Speaker 2: I mumbled high back to her, but I didn't lift

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Speaker 2: my eyes.

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Speaker 1: T no ferens at his best.

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Speaker 2: She walked past me, went to the bathroom, and she

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Speaker 2: came back and she said, I just came in and

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Speaker 2: said hello to you, and you completely ignored me. And

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Speaker 2: I said I didn't. I said hello, but her perception

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Speaker 2: was I hadn't because I hadn't. I literally hadn't moved

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Speaker 2: my gaze from what I was doing.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, because communication is more than just the mumbling of

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Speaker 1: a word.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. And I guess the biggest challenge we have is

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Speaker 2: if we were to stop doing what we're doing every

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Speaker 2: time we had a child interrupt us, for many parents,

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Speaker 2: we wouldn't get through our days a task list.

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Speaker 1: I get that a lot of parents will say that,

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Speaker 1: and yet what I have found is when I stop

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Speaker 1: and give my child the attention that they are seeking,

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Speaker 1: When I meet their eyes, when I give them a hug,

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Speaker 1: when I listen to them for a minute or two

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Speaker 1: so they tell me their thing, then they're really content

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Speaker 1: to because they've felt seen and heard and valued. They're

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Speaker 1: content to walk away with a smile on their face

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Speaker 1: and go, hmm, I feel loved and now I feel secure.

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Speaker 1: And I can go and do my thing, and paradoxically,

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Speaker 1: I find that I get more time, more focus, and

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Speaker 1: more attention by being available than I would if I

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Speaker 1: was to continually fold them off and say I'll be

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Speaker 1: with you soon, I'll be with you soon, I'll be

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Speaker 1: with you soon. Different point of view, a different way

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Speaker 1: of looking at it, but certain that's been my experience.

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Speaker 1: Let's go story number two now.

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Speaker 3: A review into the future of Victoria's into school sporting

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Speaker 3: program is underway, aiming to shift the focus away from

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Speaker 3: year round team sports and competitions things like football and rowing,

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Speaker 3: and instead focus more on things like yoga and pilates.

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Speaker 2: A recent article suggests that Victorian private schools are ditching

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Speaker 2: footy for yoga.

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Speaker 1: When I read this initially, everything about me just went

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Speaker 1: what is going on with the world? But stay with

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Speaker 1: me for just a second. Okay. So this was written

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Speaker 1: by Susie Brian and the Herald soign Cus. Brian's one

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Speaker 1: of my favorite and most fun reporters at the Held

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Speaker 1: sign and she said this, Victoria's most elite schools are

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Speaker 1: moving away from year round competitive sports like football and

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Speaker 1: rowing in favor of walking, yoga and polarates. Doesn't it

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Speaker 1: make you feel so relaxed. I mean, I feel like

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Speaker 1: we need this soundtrack all the way through the rest

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Speaker 1: of the podcast. No more rowing them with football. Let's

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Speaker 1: go for a walk and stretch out bodies. Do you

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Speaker 1: know what I mean?

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Speaker 2: Do you like that? I have two thoughts around this.

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Speaker 2: I have often thought about the different sports that our

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Speaker 2: kids involve themselves in high school or in school in general.

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Speaker 2: And the biggest acknowledgment I have is they spend all

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Speaker 2: this energy and time in this space for a handful

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Speaker 2: of years, and then they leave school and they never

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Speaker 2: do it again.

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Speaker 1: Never play that sport again. And not like cycling. They

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Speaker 1: should get the kids on the velodrome, should get the

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Speaker 1: kids on the road bike, because they can ride bikes

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Speaker 1: for the rest of their lives. We can get mammals

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Speaker 1: started young. And I think you're ignoring.

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Speaker 2: Me, you said, and I think that there is obviously

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Speaker 2: so much goodness that comes from moving our bodies and

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Speaker 2: team sports and all of the things that come with it.

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Speaker 1: They should be surfing.

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Speaker 2: But I have also thought about the fact that they

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Speaker 2: spend all of this time building up a skill set

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Speaker 2: that they never use again. And so that's one train

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Speaker 2: of thoughts. So I actually love no well, I love

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Speaker 2: the idea of schools taking up this space and acknowledging

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Speaker 2: that these are practices that if we can get the

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Speaker 2: children into from an early age, they can actually practice

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Speaker 2: this style of mindfulness for their entire lives. It's not

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Speaker 2: actually higher life, the entire life.

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Speaker 1: It's not a style of mindfulness. It's a it's a

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Speaker 1: it's a fitness, it's a lifestyle. Right, it's a way

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Speaker 1: of approaching health.

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Speaker 2: But it is mindfulness because when.

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Speaker 1: Its sustainable, that's exactly right.

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Speaker 3: Right.

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Speaker 2: But but I'm going around in circles.

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Speaker 1: We're not going to get to the third one. You

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Speaker 1: realize that, don't you. This week in parenting is going

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Speaker 1: to go.

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Speaker 2: I don't think it can come at the expense and

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Speaker 2: the exclusion of team sports. When I think about the

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Speaker 2: challenges that we have in the classrooms as it is,

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Speaker 2: because children are not allowed to move their bodies enough.

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Speaker 1: And they're not learning to cooperate enough, because there's so

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Speaker 1: much solitary work, it.

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Speaker 2: Breaks my heart to think that these sports would be

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Speaker 2: excluded from curriculums, entirely.

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Speaker 1: Curricula even I'm sorry, So let me add a couple

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Speaker 1: of things here because I was thinking about it.

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Speaker 3: There.

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Speaker 1: Sun reveals that the APS schools will continue compulsory Saturday

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Speaker 1: morning sport for senior school students, but with the renewed

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Speaker 1: focus on less competitive contact team sports. And I think

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Speaker 1: this is cultural number one, there's a move away from competition, okay,

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Speaker 1: But number two they said a growing number of enrollments

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Speaker 1: from Asian and Indian families is understood to be a

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Speaker 1: factor in the move. So what we're dealing with is

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Speaker 1: it's not just culture in terms of parents are less

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Speaker 1: inclined to push their children into competitive pursuits. That culture,

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Speaker 1: but also the culture of the Australian sporting culture is

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Speaker 1: being shifted as families with alternative cultural sporting backgrounds start

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Speaker 1: to make their way into these schools and into these environments.

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Speaker 1: And you've got I guess Indian families, and you've got

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Speaker 1: Asian families who are saying, you know, we're not into AFL,

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Speaker 1: we're not into rowing, they're not our sport. We prefer swimming,

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Speaker 1: or we prefer whatever it is, and so they're starting

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Speaker 1: to shift. I think this is fascinating. But something that

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Speaker 1: really troubles me about it is this from a a

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Speaker 1: haileyb Resource, who is anonymous, saying that schools are less

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Speaker 1: and less interested in Saturday sport and more interested in

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Speaker 1: maintaining academic result.

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Speaker 2: And that's what I'm that's what I'm concerned about as well,

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Speaker 2: this idea that we're kind of almost leaning towards a

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Speaker 2: very sedentary and academic based learning at the expense of

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Speaker 2: so much. It's just so much.

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Speaker 1: You use the word expense though, and I guess it's

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Speaker 1: also worth highlighting. Melbourne Grammar principle Philip Grutsner told The

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Speaker 1: Herald Son the logistics of providing a meaningful sporting experience

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Speaker 1: for so many students on a weekly basis across three

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Speaker 1: seasons are enormous, just huge costs. When you look at

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Speaker 1: all the kids that are involved, it's over twenty six

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Speaker 1: thousand students. The costs to organize the fields, the uniforms,

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Speaker 1: the personnel, the players, the transport, the equipment, blah blah

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Speaker 1: blah blah blah. Huge costs. But I guess the tricky

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Speaker 1: thing is this stuffs so healthy for kids. They need

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Speaker 1: to be involved in moving their bodies, they need to

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Speaker 1: have healthy lifestyles. And if it's getting dropped in because

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Speaker 1: it costs a lot of money, and it's getting dropped

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Speaker 1: because kids might not have as much time to study.

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Speaker 1: I think we're heading in the wrong direction. And that's

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Speaker 1: this week in Parenting. There is one more news story.

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Speaker 1: But guess what, you.

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Speaker 2: Can't cut it there. We've got one more story list.

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Speaker 1: Okay, look, we've got this one, like in ninety seconds.

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Speaker 2: I think we care.

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Speaker 3: Okay, go Well, nearly forty five thousand Aussie kids are

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Speaker 3: registered for homeschooling, with more and more parents now choosing

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Speaker 3: the unconventional route.

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Speaker 2: An article recently suggested that homeschooling in Queensland is booming.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this one is worth talking about. And the main

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Speaker 1: reason that we should talk about it is because on Wednesday,

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Speaker 1: I'm talking with Brett Compton. Brett is the CEO of YUCA.

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Speaker 1: Yuka is a homeschool organization that provides curriculum. There's no

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Speaker 1: sponsorship here, there's no entanglement at all. But our kids

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Speaker 1: actually use Uka as their curriculum and I thought it's

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Speaker 1: the only one that I've heard of because that's what

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Speaker 1: we're using. And I've contacted him and said can we

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Speaker 1: talk about it because of this story. So here's the

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Speaker 1: story in a nutshell. In Queensland, homeschooling enrollments have reached

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Speaker 1: a record high, according to the Courier Mail, as parents

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Speaker 1: desperate to protect their children from bullying abandoned traditional education facilities.

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Speaker 1: At home learning enrollments have sorted by two hundred and

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Speaker 1: twenty nine percent over the past five years. So in

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Speaker 1: twenty nineteen point zero three percent of Queensland students homeschooled.

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Speaker 1: Today it's about one and a half percent of the

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Speaker 1: state's eight hundred and eighty thousand students. That's the equivalent

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Speaker 1: of one student missing from every third Queensland classroom, and

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Speaker 1: the numbers are only going up. We're going to be

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Speaker 1: talking about the reasons that that's happening. But this particular

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Speaker 1: Courier Mail article was basically all about the bullying. It

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Speaker 1: was the bullying, the bullying and the bullying. Our kids

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Speaker 1: are out of school for that and other reasons, and

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Speaker 1: we're homeschooling two of them. But this is something that

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Speaker 1: is getting bigger and bigger and bigger and more and

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Speaker 1: more parents that we talk to say how do you

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Speaker 1: do it? And I'm really interested in it and how

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Speaker 1: feasible is it? So that's this week in parenting we'll

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Speaker 1: talk to Brett Moore on Wednesday to get the lowdown

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Speaker 1: on what's really going on with homeschooling across Australia.

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Speaker 2: Well, it's been a big two weeks for this week

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Speaker 2: stretch it out, but we got there.

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Speaker 1: I think we should do it more often because I

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Speaker 1: get too carried away and some of these stories are fascinating,

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Speaker 1: Like we could do entire episodes on these stories. There's

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Speaker 1: so much going on for parents to wrap their heads around.

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Speaker 1: Thanks so much for listening. We hope that it's been

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Speaker 1: really useful for you. Tomorrow, we're gonna have a conversation

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Speaker 1: about whether birth order is legit or not. All that

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Speaker 1: research that says that if you're the firstborn, you're this,

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Speaker 1: and if you're the last born, you're that middle child syndrome,

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Speaker 1: all that kind of thing.

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Speaker 2: I think it's real really Oh yeah.

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Speaker 1: Okay, we'll unpack that. You can ask me all the

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Speaker 1: questions because we're going to dive into the data and

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Speaker 1: talk about what the research says about birth order. That's

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Speaker 1: tomorrow on the Happy Families podcast, which is produced by

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Speaker 1: Justin Rowland from Bridge Media. If you would like more

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Speaker 1: info about making your family happier, Love for you to

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Speaker 1: jump online at happy families dot com dot you, especially

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Speaker 1: if you're raising an autistic We have a brand new

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Speaker 1: course that is launching. It's about to happen. Actually, you

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Speaker 1: can get on the details at happy families dot com

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Speaker 1: you or on our social media platforms dot Justin Colson's

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Speaker 1: Happy Foundies