WEBVTT - FULL SHOW: Is it every okay to publicly out a cheater? 0:00:10.379 --> 0:00:14.219 Hi Heart Podcasts, hear more Kiss podcast playlist and listen 0:00:14.259 --> 0:00:16.099 live on the Free iHeart app. 0:00:19.499 --> 0:00:23.699 Good Pickup with Britt Hockley and Laura Burn. Brady your worth, 0:00:24.619 --> 0:00:28.179 our windows down. That's my worries in the dust. Only 0:00:28.339 --> 0:00:29.618 good fabs are all down. 0:00:30.659 --> 0:00:34.899 I don't much, but yeah, I'll big get and what 0:00:35.179 --> 0:00:35.659 I want. 0:00:35.939 --> 0:00:37.059 It don't matter where. 0:00:37.699 --> 0:00:41.019 This is the picker, Hi guys, it's Britt hopefully and 0:00:41.059 --> 0:00:43.499 Laura Burn and the pick up and it's hump Day. 0:00:43.819 --> 0:00:44.819 It is humped age. 0:00:44.859 --> 0:00:46.458 You know what, though, I feel like this is kind 0:00:46.459 --> 0:00:47.659 of exciting news in my life. 0:00:47.859 --> 0:00:49.579 Probably no one else cares about it. I don't care. 0:00:50.379 --> 0:00:52.619 I care, and probably four other people at least at 0:00:52.739 --> 0:00:55.259 least people in my immediate family care about this. What's 0:00:55.299 --> 0:00:55.619 going on. 0:00:55.699 --> 0:00:58.819 We've been we've been really tossing up baby names, like 0:00:58.859 --> 0:01:01.539 what we should call this new baby, and we've not 0:01:01.579 --> 0:01:02.539 been able to decide on it. 0:01:02.539 --> 0:01:04.578 We talked about it the other week, how I. 0:01:04.459 --> 0:01:07.259 Threw out some names with my friends and family and 0:01:07.539 --> 0:01:08.419 we've got a lot of knocked back. 0:01:08.739 --> 0:01:10.219 Put it that way, So have you come to terms 0:01:10.259 --> 0:01:10.619 with one? 0:01:10.819 --> 0:01:13.139 With you and Matt, we already kind of had settled 0:01:13.179 --> 0:01:16.378 on the first name. We're both pretty unanimously really like 0:01:16.499 --> 0:01:18.259 one of the names that had been in the mix. 0:01:18.699 --> 0:01:21.779 So that's the name that we've settled on. Ok where 0:01:21.779 --> 0:01:25.658 a hundred where a Hundi baby? 0:01:26.259 --> 0:01:27.859 Like what if it's born and then all of a 0:01:27.859 --> 0:01:29.699 sudden it doesn't look like the name you've locked in. 0:01:30.059 --> 0:01:32.018 Nah. I know some people talk about that, but I 0:01:32.059 --> 0:01:34.179 find that odd because all babies kind of look a 0:01:34.219 --> 0:01:36.938 bit weird, like no babies, no babies shoot out and 0:01:36.979 --> 0:01:39.099 you're like, that looks like a David, But then when 0:01:39.098 --> 0:01:40.378 they're a grown up man, they might. 0:01:40.298 --> 0:01:42.219 Look like a David. Oh yeah, I don't know. 0:01:42.259 --> 0:01:46.619 I guess I've never had a baby. 0:01:46.699 --> 0:01:47.059 I don't know. 0:01:47.098 --> 0:01:49.618 Okay, so we've picked a name, and we've always picked 0:01:49.739 --> 0:01:50.499 names before birth. 0:01:50.499 --> 0:01:53.939 I know people do it different, any clues, like mainstream different, 0:01:54.939 --> 0:01:56.459 Like where would you place it in the. 0:01:56.539 --> 0:01:58.339 I think a little bit old fashion kind of like 0:01:58.459 --> 0:02:00.539 so Marley is a bit old fashioned, Lola is a 0:02:00.539 --> 0:02:04.579 little bit old fashioned. It's kuldbig Daphne, but it's not. No, 0:02:05.139 --> 0:02:07.898 we didn't know what to do for a middle name. 0:02:07.899 --> 0:02:10.018 We haven't been out to decide because we've already used 0:02:10.019 --> 0:02:12.299 all of the sentimental family names and our other kids, 0:02:12.539 --> 0:02:14.099 so now we're at the bottom of the barrel when 0:02:14.099 --> 0:02:16.619 it comes to middle names. So we thought a nice 0:02:16.619 --> 0:02:20.459 way of getting the kids involved to be part of 0:02:20.579 --> 0:02:23.859 the process of us having a third baby would be 0:02:24.099 --> 0:02:25.939 to ask them what they would want to name the 0:02:25.978 --> 0:02:27.339 baby if they could choose a middle name. 0:02:27.619 --> 0:02:29.939 Just keep it in mind to all of those listening there. 0:02:29.978 --> 0:02:31.899 Five and four, five and four. 0:02:32.258 --> 0:02:33.779 They came up with a middle name that and I 0:02:33.779 --> 0:02:35.299 both thought it was very sweet. We liked it. 0:02:35.299 --> 0:02:37.698 It flows really nicely with the first name. But then 0:02:37.739 --> 0:02:40.899 we discovered it's actually a Disney character. Okay, so all right, 0:02:41.138 --> 0:02:42.538 interesting Disney process. 0:02:42.698 --> 0:02:46.418 Disney, there's yeah, there's your clue, don't old. 0:02:47.299 --> 0:02:48.899 I was trying to think of one, and I just 0:02:49.059 --> 0:02:50.578 the first thing came to away was black white, and 0:02:50.619 --> 0:02:51.339 I was like, that's not it. 0:02:51.579 --> 0:02:54.538 So right, yeah, but no, I don't know what. It's 0:02:54.579 --> 0:02:56.459 been a while since I've watched Disney, I must admit. 0:02:56.579 --> 0:02:58.418 Anyway, Look, we've picked a middle name, we picked a 0:02:58.499 --> 0:03:00.499 first name, and then you know, she's just gonna be 0:03:00.499 --> 0:03:02.339 a Johnson, run of the mill once again, be the 0:03:02.418 --> 0:03:03.298 only burn in the family. 0:03:03.379 --> 0:03:05.298 Okay, I can't wait to hear all about that. 0:03:06.978 --> 0:03:09.499 We had quite a big conversation our podcast this week 0:03:09.579 --> 0:03:11.059 Life on Cut podcast. 0:03:10.698 --> 0:03:11.819 And also privately. 0:03:12.019 --> 0:03:14.779 Yeah, and it's well, I mean, as two people who 0:03:14.819 --> 0:03:17.579 are not only co hosting together, like we asked such 0:03:17.579 --> 0:03:22.099 good friends and a conversation we've had to navigate recently 0:03:22.698 --> 0:03:25.419 was me telling you that I was pregnant with number 0:03:25.418 --> 0:03:28.258 three and to kind of like let you guys in 0:03:28.379 --> 0:03:30.499 on our friendship over the last six years. Like Britta 0:03:30.499 --> 0:03:32.459 and I, we've been so entwined in each other's lives 0:03:32.499 --> 0:03:34.219 for the last six years. 0:03:35.179 --> 0:03:37.019 I see britt more than I see in my husband. 0:03:37.619 --> 0:03:40.299 And evidence of that is the fact that, like for 0:03:40.379 --> 0:03:42.819 baby number one and baby number two, and also for 0:03:42.859 --> 0:03:46.379 the two miscarriages that I've had in between, Britt, as 0:03:46.539 --> 0:03:48.779 one of my best friends, was the first person I 0:03:48.819 --> 0:03:50.859 told that I was pregnant. She was also the first 0:03:50.859 --> 0:03:53.699 person I told when I was going through miscarriages, even 0:03:53.779 --> 0:03:55.738 before I told my husband. 0:03:55.419 --> 0:03:57.339 And something about it's a bit of a flex. I know, 0:03:57.499 --> 0:03:59.898 I love it, like I'm like, yeah, I'm the number one. 0:04:00.059 --> 0:04:01.458 Let me tell you, I don't think Matt loves it 0:04:01.459 --> 0:04:02.178 as much as you don't. 0:04:02.219 --> 0:04:03.899 One, No, I also get that. 0:04:04.099 --> 0:04:06.059 I get that, but you know there's been a big 0:04:06.099 --> 0:04:09.619 gap between my last baby and this pregnancy, and a 0:04:09.659 --> 0:04:11.419 lot of things have happened and changed in your life, 0:04:11.459 --> 0:04:15.539 brit You've been through your own fertility struggles. You frozen eggs, 0:04:15.539 --> 0:04:19.618 you've frozen embryos, You've had your own negative pregnancy tests 0:04:19.619 --> 0:04:21.579 at a time when I'm sure you were hopeful that 0:04:21.619 --> 0:04:24.099 they were going to be positive. And it felt like 0:04:24.139 --> 0:04:29.059 a very different conversation this time telling you and I 0:04:29.139 --> 0:04:31.259 knew you were going to be excited for it, and 0:04:31.299 --> 0:04:32.699 I knew you were going to be happy for me, 0:04:33.259 --> 0:04:36.019 but knowing that that might also cause some sadness in 0:04:36.059 --> 0:04:38.539 you at the same time. And the reason why we 0:04:38.579 --> 0:04:41.259 wanted to talk about this is because so much of 0:04:41.299 --> 0:04:44.219 what we talk about on our podcast is around female friendship, 0:04:44.419 --> 0:04:47.619 and these are the conversations that so many women have 0:04:47.699 --> 0:04:51.339 to navigate and navigate sensitively with the people they love 0:04:51.379 --> 0:04:54.779 in their life when maybe their experience in a pregnancy, 0:04:54.819 --> 0:04:57.299 knowing that their friends are not in a similar state 0:04:57.419 --> 0:05:00.859 or able to knowing that some people go through pregnancy loss, 0:05:01.339 --> 0:05:02.819 and how do you do it in a way that 0:05:02.899 --> 0:05:06.099 holds space while also allowing yourself to be happy for 0:05:06.139 --> 0:05:08.539 the news that you carry and Laura. 0:05:08.379 --> 0:05:11.339 And and I obviously had our conversations in private before 0:05:11.379 --> 0:05:12.979 we had them on the podcast Life on Card. 0:05:13.019 --> 0:05:15.419 Well, that's the thing, like we often do everything with 0:05:15.499 --> 0:05:17.859 Mike's on because it's nice to get everyone's like real 0:05:17.899 --> 0:05:18.499 reaction to. 0:05:18.499 --> 0:05:20.659 Something, but not this kind of stuff. Yeah, and I 0:05:20.699 --> 0:05:22.419 didn't know what that reaction would be. 0:05:22.699 --> 0:05:27.859 Of course, my first overwhelming feeling was happiness and excitement. 0:05:27.939 --> 0:05:30.499 Sadness didn't even end to my brain like there were 0:05:30.499 --> 0:05:31.379 tears as well. 0:05:31.419 --> 0:05:34.099 It came later, for sure, and you feel it. But 0:05:35.419 --> 0:05:36.939 this is why I say you can feel two things 0:05:36.939 --> 0:05:40.019 at once, because I would hate And this was something 0:05:40.059 --> 0:05:40.779 that we did talk about. 0:05:40.819 --> 0:05:41.019 Laura. 0:05:41.099 --> 0:05:44.259 You said that you had almost a level of anxiety 0:05:44.339 --> 0:05:46.779 about telling me because you know that is going to 0:05:46.819 --> 0:05:49.499 come with a whole bunch of feelings that are nobody's fault, 0:05:49.819 --> 0:05:51.899 not mine and not yours, but they're still going to 0:05:51.939 --> 0:05:57.019 be present. When I heard how much you would, I 0:05:57.019 --> 0:05:59.139 don't want to say struggling to. 0:05:59.179 --> 0:06:01.339 Have the conversation. That hurt me even more. 0:06:01.379 --> 0:06:03.259 And I'm not saying I'm not blaming that on you, 0:06:03.339 --> 0:06:06.739 but me thinking, oh my god, my friends don't even 0:06:06.779 --> 0:06:09.099 feel like they can tell me their most exciting I 0:06:09.139 --> 0:06:11.019 hate that, and I never want my friends to feel 0:06:11.059 --> 0:06:12.979 like anything I'm going through means that they can't have 0:06:13.059 --> 0:06:14.019 that conversation with me. 0:06:14.419 --> 0:06:15.619 It doesn't mean I'm not gonna have. 0:06:15.619 --> 0:06:19.299 All the big feelings totally, but it almost in a 0:06:19.339 --> 0:06:22.419 way can isolate that person even more, Like I don't 0:06:22.419 --> 0:06:24.219 feel like I can come to you anymore is something 0:06:24.219 --> 0:06:26.019 in a friendship that is also really hard to hear. 0:06:26.059 --> 0:06:27.499 And I know that you're not saying you don't feel 0:06:27.499 --> 0:06:29.339 like you can come to me, And it's so important 0:06:29.339 --> 0:06:31.579 that you do consider your friends feelings like you did. 0:06:31.979 --> 0:06:33.779 I definitely think you did it the right way. 0:06:34.219 --> 0:06:35.459 I guess for me as well. 0:06:35.539 --> 0:06:37.899 And it's a unique situation because obviously we work together 0:06:37.939 --> 0:06:40.619 and we are very very close friends. People do talk 0:06:40.659 --> 0:06:43.659 about third baby a bit differently to first and second. Yeah, 0:06:43.699 --> 0:06:46.379 first and second, I think is often met with excitement 0:06:46.739 --> 0:06:48.499 and third is met with a bit of like, what 0:06:48.539 --> 0:06:49.099 are you doing? 0:06:49.259 --> 0:06:50.219 And so I. 0:06:50.059 --> 0:06:53.019 Definitely felt as though I had to be more conscious 0:06:53.299 --> 0:06:56.539 around how I navigated third pregnancy conversations, even from like 0:06:56.579 --> 0:06:58.899 a work perspective, because I was like a working I 0:06:58.979 --> 0:07:00.699 think I take my job seriously when I'm just out 0:07:00.699 --> 0:07:03.139 here pumping up babies at the same time. But I 0:07:03.859 --> 0:07:06.339 agree completely with everything you said, Britt. I also think 0:07:06.339 --> 0:07:08.499 that there's another feeling that comes into play with these commons, 0:07:09.699 --> 0:07:13.099 and it's from my side or from the person who 0:07:13.179 --> 0:07:16.979 is able to have a pregnancy. There's a feeling of 0:07:17.019 --> 0:07:19.379 guilt when you know that you have friends in your 0:07:19.419 --> 0:07:23.459 life who you love deeply and endlessly and they are struggling. 0:07:23.779 --> 0:07:27.139 There's a feeling of guilt that it's come easily and 0:07:27.179 --> 0:07:29.459 that you're not able to fix that problem for your friend, 0:07:29.499 --> 0:07:31.619 and as much as you can hold space for it, 0:07:31.619 --> 0:07:35.819 it's like navigating both of those things simultaneously is also 0:07:36.139 --> 0:07:38.939 quite a complex feeling, And I know that there are 0:07:39.059 --> 0:07:42.819 women who, when they see the happy pregnancy announcement on Instagram, 0:07:42.979 --> 0:07:45.419 are in a place where it's really really hard for 0:07:45.459 --> 0:07:47.499 them and they might need to block or mute or 0:07:48.059 --> 0:07:50.939 create some space around themselves for their own protection. But 0:07:50.979 --> 0:07:53.019 that's also why I think it's always been so important 0:07:53.019 --> 0:07:55.939 to us anytime that we have had conversations around pregnancy, 0:07:56.699 --> 0:07:59.859 we've also spoken about pregnancy loss, which has been an 0:07:59.899 --> 0:08:03.619 intrinsic part of my pregnancy journey, is having multiple miscarriages. 0:08:03.699 --> 0:08:07.379 So I do think that sometimes talking about the things 0:08:07.379 --> 0:08:10.459 that are not so spoken about publicly is the antidote 0:08:10.699 --> 0:08:13.339 for both the guilt and the sadness, knowing that everyone's 0:08:14.059 --> 0:08:17.299 kind of going through their own unique fertility journey and 0:08:17.339 --> 0:08:18.819 motherhood journey at the same time. 0:08:19.019 --> 0:08:21.259 Yeah, and it's a tricky conversation to have with your friends, 0:08:21.339 --> 0:08:24.619 especially if there is someone that has been going through 0:08:24.659 --> 0:08:26.619 it for years. And we also had this a really 0:08:26.699 --> 0:08:29.419 brilliant conversation on Life un Cut podcast with Tania Hennessy, 0:08:29.779 --> 0:08:31.099 So if you guys want to listen to that, she 0:08:31.099 --> 0:08:33.379 speaks so openly about it and so beautifully about it. 0:08:33.419 --> 0:08:35.699 But navigating is really tricky. 0:08:35.739 --> 0:08:38.899 But what I will say is something being a hard 0:08:38.899 --> 0:08:41.059 conversation doesn't mean you shouldn't have it. It just means 0:08:41.099 --> 0:08:43.699 you treat it with a little bit more care. But absolutely, yeah, 0:08:43.779 --> 0:08:46.139 remember it's okay to have all these feelings all at once. 0:08:46.699 --> 0:08:48.659 If you ask someone who is struggling with this at 0:08:48.659 --> 0:08:50.019 the moment, or you're going through it in your own 0:08:50.059 --> 0:08:51.939 friendship group, you might want to go and give the 0:08:52.059 --> 0:08:54.019 episode a listen. You can just search Life on cart 0:08:54.019 --> 0:08:56.579 wherever you listen to your podcasts, because there's a bigger 0:08:56.659 --> 0:08:59.899 conversation about that right there, Laura, I. 0:08:59.819 --> 0:09:01.819 Have a question for you. We talk a. 0:09:01.739 --> 0:09:04.859 Lot about cheating here and on our podcast Life Uncut 0:09:04.899 --> 0:09:07.899 in terms of all different kinds of relationships and infidelity, 0:09:07.939 --> 0:09:10.739 and I want to know, do you think there's ever 0:09:10.779 --> 0:09:15.059 a time it's okay to publicly humiliate somebody off the 0:09:15.059 --> 0:09:19.179 back of infidelity, which I know seems like an obvious answer. 0:09:19.299 --> 0:09:20.099 Cheating is like. 0:09:20.059 --> 0:09:23.619 The one thing that, like nothing riles people up in 0:09:23.699 --> 0:09:25.819 when it comes to relationships as much as the conversation 0:09:25.819 --> 0:09:28.299 around cheating does. Do I think it's okay to publicly 0:09:28.339 --> 0:09:31.499 humiliate them? No, I think it makes you a bit petty. 0:09:31.939 --> 0:09:34.459 But I've also been in the situation where I've been 0:09:34.539 --> 0:09:37.499 cheated on and at the time really thought about publicly 0:09:37.579 --> 0:09:40.059 humiliating them because you want, you want some sort of vindication, 0:09:40.139 --> 0:09:43.179 You want people to know, you want like their friends 0:09:43.339 --> 0:09:46.019 and their family and their mum to know like what 0:09:46.059 --> 0:09:47.059 an asshole they are. 0:09:47.059 --> 0:09:49.819 Of course, but there's something for me that doesn't sit 0:09:49.899 --> 0:09:51.859 right with the idea of public humiliation. 0:09:52.019 --> 0:09:52.219 Ever. 0:09:52.379 --> 0:09:55.379 I don't know why whatever even is done, there's something 0:09:55.419 --> 0:09:57.219 that when I see it go down, I just really 0:09:57.259 --> 0:09:59.099 feel for them, even if they've done the wrong thing. 0:09:59.619 --> 0:10:02.099 This is exactly what has happened in this story online. 0:10:02.779 --> 0:10:06.139 There's a husband that found out that his wife was 0:10:06.219 --> 0:10:08.979 cheating on him, and it was his fortieth birth day party. 0:10:09.059 --> 0:10:11.459 So we had this huge party with like family and friends, 0:10:11.979 --> 0:10:13.979 and he got up to do his speech, you know, 0:10:14.059 --> 0:10:17.619 like thank you for coming blah blah blah blah. Yeah, Basically, 0:10:17.779 --> 0:10:19.979 he had known his partner was cheating on him, so 0:10:20.019 --> 0:10:21.939 he saved it for this moment. He calls her up 0:10:21.939 --> 0:10:24.699 on stage and he makes it look like he's doing 0:10:24.699 --> 0:10:26.499 this beautiful thank you and he has a gift to 0:10:26.539 --> 0:10:27.899 her and how important she is. 0:10:27.899 --> 0:10:28.699 And all this stuff. 0:10:28.979 --> 0:10:30.739 He gets her to take a wedding ring off because 0:10:30.739 --> 0:10:33.419 he alludes to the fact that, you know, she deserves 0:10:33.419 --> 0:10:36.099 an upgrade. He plans the kiss of death on her. 0:10:36.579 --> 0:10:39.379 He basically kisses her like quite firmly and strongly. But 0:10:39.419 --> 0:10:41.179 the kiss of death is this idea. It's like in 0:10:41.219 --> 0:10:44.059 the it's like a mafia thing. Whence a mafia person 0:10:44.099 --> 0:10:46.179 finds out that someone has betrayed them, they give them 0:10:46.219 --> 0:10:47.859 what they call the kiss of death, which means like, 0:10:48.459 --> 0:10:50.619 I know you've betrayed me and something's about to happen. 0:10:50.659 --> 0:10:53.539 So he does that, which is very dramatic. Now you 0:10:53.619 --> 0:10:55.219 need to listen to how crazy this is. 0:10:55.299 --> 0:10:58.539 After even though it's get her. 0:10:58.419 --> 0:11:17.099 A little song, right, yeah, I know everything, I know everybody, and. 0:11:18.859 --> 0:11:19.579 I wasn't. 0:11:22.979 --> 0:11:24.619 He sounds terrific. 0:11:25.299 --> 0:11:28.699 He goes on to say like he's seen some sexy things, 0:11:28.739 --> 0:11:30.019 he's seen some body parts. 0:11:29.819 --> 0:11:32.499 He starts to go like crazy at her. 0:11:32.499 --> 0:11:34.259 The video goes so much longer than that, but he's 0:11:34.299 --> 0:11:37.218 basically just staying in front of everyone humiliating her even 0:11:37.219 --> 0:11:39.899 though she's done the wrong thing obviously, but the fact 0:11:39.939 --> 0:11:43.619 that this was so premeditated to save it for a 0:11:43.659 --> 0:11:45.939 public moment get her up Lula. 0:11:45.739 --> 0:11:47.659 Into a false sense of security that he's gonna like 0:11:47.699 --> 0:11:52.019 say she's amazing and then go oh, he sounds nah. 0:11:52.059 --> 0:11:54.819 I think like listening to that, he sounds so aggressive 0:11:54.859 --> 0:11:59.099 and sounds truly horrible. And I guess, like I understand 0:11:59.139 --> 0:12:00.979 that if you've been cheated on, your hurt and you 0:12:01.019 --> 0:12:03.578 probably won't to have a big reaction everything, But I 0:12:03.619 --> 0:12:05.699 don't know. I think listening to that, like you almost 0:12:05.739 --> 0:12:07.059 come across as the villain yourself. 0:12:07.099 --> 0:12:08.618 You come across so petty. 0:12:09.099 --> 0:12:11.099 I mean, I've definitely heard of like people standing at 0:12:11.099 --> 0:12:12.899 the altar and waiting until it was time to do 0:12:12.899 --> 0:12:15.899 their vows. And that was the opportunity that they took 0:12:16.019 --> 0:12:18.339 to you know, tell everyone, the family, the friends, everyone 0:12:18.379 --> 0:12:20.859 who's there, to tell them that actually their partner had 0:12:20.899 --> 0:12:23.339 been cheating on them. But we actually received a message 0:12:23.339 --> 0:12:25.419 which is you know, to the pickup, which is kind 0:12:25.419 --> 0:12:28.859 of along this line of things. So this was someone 0:12:28.979 --> 0:12:31.779 who works with an Australia who works in a very 0:12:31.819 --> 0:12:34.739 prominent hospital and it said this one of the doctors 0:12:34.899 --> 0:12:38.099 and a senior executive at our hospital got caught having 0:12:38.139 --> 0:12:38.619 an affair. 0:12:39.419 --> 0:12:41.379 The senior executive was a woman, mind you. 0:12:41.699 --> 0:12:44.259 The husband of the exec used her phone to send 0:12:44.259 --> 0:12:47.339 an email to leak their affair and the email was 0:12:47.379 --> 0:12:49.299 sent to the entire hospital staff. 0:12:49.859 --> 0:12:52.939 Every single hospital staff. 0:12:53.219 --> 0:12:56.979 Thousands of people received the email from her saying this 0:12:57.059 --> 0:12:58.459 is what I've done and this is like the person 0:12:58.459 --> 0:12:59.059 I'm doing with. 0:12:59.099 --> 0:13:00.739 It was like was written by her, It was written 0:13:00.739 --> 0:13:01.259 by the husband. 0:13:01.299 --> 0:13:03.499 It was written well, actually there's a bit more detail 0:13:03.539 --> 0:13:05.659 to this. It was written by the husband and it 0:13:05.739 --> 0:13:07.339 was saying, like just letting you all know what they've 0:13:07.379 --> 0:13:07.739 been doing. 0:13:08.499 --> 0:13:12.939 They're supposed to be on working hours. How humiliating. Look, 0:13:13.139 --> 0:13:14.019 But then is that okay. 0:13:14.339 --> 0:13:16.219 No, I don't think any of it's okay. But at 0:13:16.219 --> 0:13:18.779 the same time, I also understand it. I do understand 0:13:19.179 --> 0:13:22.739 why someone could be so hurt and feel so betrayed 0:13:22.819 --> 0:13:25.859 that they act in a way that's so not congruent 0:13:25.899 --> 0:13:28.219 with how they would normally behave because they just want 0:13:28.499 --> 0:13:31.499 everyone to know what an awful person their partner's been. 0:13:31.499 --> 0:13:33.499 Do I actually think it's okay? Would I ever do it? 0:13:33.579 --> 0:13:33.659 No? 0:13:33.819 --> 0:13:37.779 I think it's totally petty, But I also understand why 0:13:37.819 --> 0:13:39.939 some people feel that's the only option to enact some 0:13:39.979 --> 0:13:40.579 sort of revenge. 0:13:40.699 --> 0:13:43.459 I remember when my ex many moons ago. Now I 0:13:43.499 --> 0:13:45.819 was living his double life and he was marrying someone 0:13:45.819 --> 0:13:48.819 else simultaneously, like complete double life. But I remember when 0:13:48.819 --> 0:13:50.819 I found out, all I wanted to do was out 0:13:50.899 --> 0:13:53.819 him to everyone I knew, like I wanted to humiliate him, 0:13:54.059 --> 0:13:55.619 but I didn't have it in me. So all I 0:13:55.659 --> 0:13:58.659 could bring myself to do was steal all his toilet 0:13:58.659 --> 0:14:00.379 paper from his house, and next time we did a poop, 0:14:00.419 --> 0:14:00.939 he didn't. 0:14:00.699 --> 0:14:02.939 Have anything to wipe his butt. Actually, I don't even 0:14:02.979 --> 0:14:05.458 think that touched the side. Literally it didn't, and that's 0:14:05.499 --> 0:14:07.779 I don't think he can. No, he didn't, he would 0:14:07.779 --> 0:14:08.419 have just had a shower. 0:14:13.579 --> 0:14:16.578 Now, Britt, I feel like I have spoken about Lola 0:14:16.819 --> 0:14:19.979 so much recently for anyone who doesn't know as new 0:14:19.979 --> 0:14:21.419 to the show, Lola is my four year old. 0:14:21.659 --> 0:14:25.259 She is also just a wild cat. She's the personality 0:14:25.339 --> 0:14:26.179 higher of the family. 0:14:26.299 --> 0:14:26.539 She is. 0:14:26.539 --> 0:14:28.099 I've gotten in trouble from saying that she is the 0:14:28.099 --> 0:14:29.179 personality higher of the family. 0:14:29.499 --> 0:14:29.779 She is. 0:14:30.019 --> 0:14:32.299 She comes out with the funniest things. She's just a 0:14:32.299 --> 0:14:35.419 little character. She's hard to maintain and control, and I 0:14:35.499 --> 0:14:36.299 love that about her. 0:14:36.539 --> 0:14:39.339 I love her little feisty spirit. If she was an animal, 0:14:39.379 --> 0:14:42.819 what joking should be like a mere cat, That's what 0:14:42.859 --> 0:14:44.939 I thought too in my head, but. 0:14:44.899 --> 0:14:46.699 One that screams. I don't know if mea cats make 0:14:46.739 --> 0:14:48.739 much noise. I feel like they just are quite meek. No, 0:14:48.859 --> 0:14:49.619 they make sounds. 0:14:49.659 --> 0:14:51.179 One of them has to stand up on the little 0:14:51.259 --> 0:14:53.379 hill and it keeps an eye out for predators, and 0:14:53.419 --> 0:14:54.099 then it makes. 0:14:53.899 --> 0:14:55.659 A sound to all the other mea cats to hide. 0:14:55.699 --> 0:14:57.619 Maybe Lola's like a cross between a mere cat and 0:14:57.659 --> 0:14:58.419 a chimpanzee. 0:14:58.659 --> 0:15:00.099 I'm pretty sure that's what she done. 0:15:00.179 --> 0:15:03.579 So Lola, recently, we've worked really hard on getting her 0:15:04.019 --> 0:15:06.259 sleeping in her own bed. This year was also like 0:15:06.299 --> 0:15:07.819 the year that we took the dummy away. Like, we've 0:15:07.859 --> 0:15:10.099 had some big progress over the last couple of months 0:15:10.099 --> 0:15:12.699 with Lola going from like giving up the things that 0:15:12.739 --> 0:15:14.739 she was so attached to as like a little kid, 0:15:15.099 --> 0:15:16.579 to really her vices. 0:15:16.659 --> 0:15:19.019 We've got her off the dummyady. She's not smoking anymore. 0:15:19.059 --> 0:15:20.939 She's not she's not doing the babe nothing like. She's 0:15:20.979 --> 0:15:21.979 come good. She's come clean. 0:15:22.059 --> 0:15:22.499 That great. 0:15:22.979 --> 0:15:25.419 So we've done leaps and bounds, so I thought we had. 0:15:25.459 --> 0:15:28.859 We've had a little small regression, small which was except 0:15:28.939 --> 0:15:29.579 kind of embarrassing. 0:15:29.579 --> 0:15:31.299 I'm trying to think which it is the dummy regress 0:15:31.339 --> 0:15:32.539 for a bit. But I think you're back on. 0:15:32.459 --> 0:15:35.699 Track, back on track, We're back on trackeeping. So you 0:15:35.739 --> 0:15:38.779 guys might remember quite a while back I talked about 0:15:38.779 --> 0:15:41.339 how Lola went through a phase she was about two 0:15:41.339 --> 0:15:43.179 and a half to three. It went on for far 0:15:43.299 --> 0:15:45.899 longer than I ever wish on anybody where she would 0:15:45.899 --> 0:15:47.139 wear underwear on her head. 0:15:47.259 --> 0:15:49.379 Oh that was my favorite Lola era. 0:15:49.699 --> 0:15:52.819 So she was convinced that underwear was a hat, underwear 0:15:52.899 --> 0:15:55.579 was made for outside wears if she wasn't wearing it 0:15:55.739 --> 0:15:57.819 a hat like on her head. She would wear it 0:15:57.979 --> 0:16:00.899 over her pants, so she'd put underwear on Superman, then 0:16:00.899 --> 0:16:02.819 she would put her leggings on, and then she would 0:16:02.859 --> 0:16:04.099 put underwear over her leggings. 0:16:04.219 --> 0:16:06.419 I that was still a vibe. That's actually very fashionable 0:16:06.499 --> 0:16:08.219 right now. But the undies on her head was my fave. 0:16:08.659 --> 0:16:12.299 We flew to Darwin, We got in the car, we 0:16:12.419 --> 0:16:15.139 drove from the car to the airport, from the airport. 0:16:14.779 --> 0:16:17.259 Through the security, we got on a flight. 0:16:17.339 --> 0:16:18.899 We flew all the way there and she had a 0:16:18.939 --> 0:16:20.939 pair of undies on her head the entire way. 0:16:20.979 --> 0:16:23.699 What happens if you take them off like screw like meltdown. 0:16:23.819 --> 0:16:25.619 She just put them back on. She's just like like, 0:16:25.659 --> 0:16:27.979 there's no taking them off her. She's absolutely not going. 0:16:27.899 --> 0:16:28.219 To have that. 0:16:28.379 --> 0:16:30.419 Or she used to pack extra ones, so like you 0:16:30.499 --> 0:16:32.179 go on a trip or a car trip, she'd have 0:16:32.179 --> 0:16:33.939 a handbag. You'd open the handbag and it'd just be 0:16:34.059 --> 0:16:34.899 seven pairs of undy. 0:16:35.259 --> 0:16:35.819 Smart girl. 0:16:35.979 --> 0:16:38.659