Speaker 1: Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout
Speaker 1: Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We
Speaker 1: pay our respect to their elders past and present and
Speaker 1: extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Island
Speaker 1: people's today.
Speaker 2: This episode is recorded on Gadigal Land of the Aurora Nation.
Speaker 2: Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut.
Speaker 2: I'm Laura, I'm Brittany, and this is our radio show.
Speaker 2: So every Saturday morning across the country, we the three
Speaker 2: of us, the three Musketeers.
Speaker 3: You know, you sung this on the phone to me
Speaker 3: the other day, Britt you went there.
Speaker 4: But Laura's like, you know, we really have the three
Speaker 4: best friends anybody ever had.
Speaker 1: I don't know if that classifies when you sing the
Speaker 1: songs to each other and I'm not there very thin.
Speaker 2: We were thinking about you, though, What does that count? Yes,
Speaker 2: we're telling you about it.
Speaker 1: Well, we do have a great show coming up today.
Speaker 1: I have mentioned before that I have had an unusual experience.
Speaker 2: In the nude at the massage. While yes, look I
Speaker 2: mean britt had she went and had a message and
Speaker 2: something happened to her that she got for free and
Speaker 2: probably should have paid extra for. I did not get paid.
Speaker 2: I did not get free.
Speaker 1: But I wonder if usually it is an added extra.
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, there was also an article which I came
Speaker 2: across today which made me feel physically sick. You were
Speaker 2: gagging all but I can't even think about it. It's
Speaker 2: something that someone found in their in flight food on
Speaker 2: a flight on their way to Dusseldorf. It's disgusting, Yeah,
Speaker 2: it was.
Speaker 3: It was awful.
Speaker 2: Also probably the most important thing. Happy birthday, Mitch Chury.
Speaker 3: Oh it's not the most important thing.
Speaker 2: Oh, I mean it's pretty important.
Speaker 3: It's an awkward age. It's like you're not really like
Speaker 3: your young adult, Like I'm.
Speaker 2: Twenty seven six. I think twenty seven is a great year.
Speaker 2: But I would say, I would say your life is
Speaker 2: starting now.
Speaker 1: Stuff's going to get so good for you the next
Speaker 1: few years, because you get to a point where I'm
Speaker 1: speaking on behalf of myself, but I feel like you
Speaker 1: really start to come into yourself at twenty seven. You're
Speaker 1: in a more stable environment. Usually you're starting to earn
Speaker 1: a bit more money me, I mean, you can do
Speaker 1: more things.
Speaker 2: Going to depend one percent agree with like I think
Speaker 2: my life, like my my favorite years of my entire
Speaker 2: life have been since I was thirty. Really if everything
Speaker 2: just got better and better.
Speaker 1: From thirty for me At twenty seven, I turned twenty seven,
Speaker 1: So your age right now, and that is when I
Speaker 1: bought a one way ticket to Brazil and I came
Speaker 1: back three years later, like I just started my adventures
Speaker 1: at twenty seven. So I look at you like I'm
Speaker 1: not that much older than you, but I look back
Speaker 1: at with like so much nostalgia, Like you're in the
Speaker 1: best part of your life right now.
Speaker 2: So have your birthday only good things that come in
Speaker 2: your life.
Speaker 3: Get me a card. Maybe there's a ticket to Brazil
Speaker 3: in there.
Speaker 2: Maybe I'm probably not. Maybe maybe lose the car fair.
Speaker 2: Maybe we're replace I like when you say, like I'm
Speaker 2: not that much older than you, Like we're closer to
Speaker 2: a decade older than Mitch than.
Speaker 1: What we are, not I mean, you're older than me
Speaker 1: only by a year two. Well no, but the way
Speaker 1: I'm speaking to him is like I've lived four decades longer.
Speaker 3: I was gonna say, guys, we get along like a
Speaker 3: house on fire is nothing, and.
Speaker 2: That I feel like I'm the same age as you.
Speaker 1: It's only when you say you're twenty seven, I'm like, wow,
Speaker 1: I was just doing that huge troop at that age.
Speaker 2: It's because Brittany likes the younger men.
Speaker 1: It's not that I like younger men, but Brittany doesn't discriminate.
Speaker 3: You're the reverse Leonardo DiCaprio.
Speaker 2: No, I am the woman. I was like, what, she
Speaker 2: likes old people under the age of sixty. This is
Speaker 2: what happens.
Speaker 1: She turned twenty seven and all of a sudden, age.
Speaker 2: Doesn't matter anymore. That's what I think.
Speaker 1: Under that it's a bit not the worst, but it's
Speaker 1: all a touch on go. But once you're twenty seven
Speaker 1: on Bob's your uncle was twenty seven, Laura, Oh, I
Speaker 1: was having the worst relationships that anybody who could ever
Speaker 1: have twenty seven.
Speaker 2: I was drunk a lot, partied a lot, and had
Speaker 2: a terrible, terrible boyfriend.
Speaker 3: At the time.
Speaker 1: Okay, so my twenty seven was better than lost awful.
Speaker 2: I look back on that and I'm just like, what
Speaker 2: an awful couple of years that was? What was I doing?
Speaker 1: Have you got anything big you want to tick off
Speaker 1: in the year of twenty seven.
Speaker 3: Mitch, No, I'm just excited to be working with you
Speaker 3: guys more. I love you guys.
Speaker 2: No, we didn't even pain to say that.
Speaker 3: He didn't, but I just opened the card. I'm going
Speaker 3: to preserve.
Speaker 2: Let's get into the show.
Speaker 4: There's life on cut radio show across the Country. Brittany
Speaker 4: Hockley and Laura Ben. I don't know why Laura burn
Speaker 4: is talking about Dusseldorf, but.
Speaker 2: I feel physically sick. Okay, I'm going to share this
Speaker 2: with you. So there was I mean, we all know
Speaker 2: that in flight food is pretty rubbish to start with.
Speaker 3: All right.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm sure the first class flyers don't have
Speaker 1: any problems, but for everyone else, all of us back
Speaker 1: in would not know what that's like.
Speaker 2: Neither would I. But I imagine it's not. Okay, but
Speaker 2: there is somebody, Oh gosh, there is somebody who's in
Speaker 2: flight food has was truly as rubbish as it comes. Okay,
Speaker 2: there was a flight on an Have you had a
Speaker 2: Sun Express?
Speaker 3: Oh no, but it sounds like a plane that would.
Speaker 1: Crash and if you if you haven't heard of it,
Speaker 1: there's a big problem.
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, there was a flight on sun Express. It
Speaker 2: was flying from Turkey to Dusseldorf. And this person was
Speaker 2: served what was already a questionable meal of ravioli and spinach.
Speaker 2: I love, yeah. Do you know what they had in
Speaker 2: their meal? Spinach?
Speaker 1: How much?
Speaker 2: And I hope for the best?
Speaker 1: Well?
Speaker 2: Amongst the spinach is this little picture. You can you
Speaker 2: make out what that is in the middle? Is that
Speaker 2: a snakehead?
Speaker 3: Can you see that that's ahead of a snake?
Speaker 2: There was a severed snakehead, a real snakehead, amongst the
Speaker 2: spinach and ravioli, and they had half eaten it, and
Speaker 2: it was hiding under the greens.
Speaker 3: Oh, they thought it was a green bean.
Speaker 2: Do you know what the thing is here?
Speaker 1: This is a vegetarian meal, This was supposed to be
Speaker 1: a vegetarian year.
Speaker 2: And now there is a part of an animal in
Speaker 2: the meal.
Speaker 3: What if they're alogic to snakes?
Speaker 2: What if it was venomous?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 3: What about a rattletail?
Speaker 2: How does a snake head? How does a snakehead get
Speaker 2: into someone's meal? I mean, oh, look, there's plenty of
Speaker 2: questionable things that ended up in people's food. Fingernails. Oh, actually,
Speaker 2: this reminds me. Once upon a time I had had
Speaker 2: a whole group of friends over they were all Matt's friends,
Speaker 2: and it was when we just started dating. And this
Speaker 2: is something I did. I was like, I'm gonna impress them.
Speaker 2: I have this one pasta dish because I'm a terrible cook,
Speaker 2: but I can cook a really good prawn pasta.
Speaker 3: You had on rotation.
Speaker 2: You always cook, always, didn't you people? So I thought
Speaker 2: I could roll out the prawn pastor again anyway, I
Speaker 2: actually well, I served it and then this one guy
Speaker 2: who I'd met for the very first time now his
Speaker 2: a lovely, dear friend, and he was sitting there and
Speaker 2: he started gagging after a few mouthfuls, and I was like, well,
Speaker 2: that's not a good sun and I mean, like choking gagging.
Speaker 2: He's having a dick fit. No, what had happened was
Speaker 2: not only had a piece of my hair and at
Speaker 2: the time I had quite long hair, ended up in
Speaker 2: his food. He had swallowed half the hair which was
Speaker 2: still connected to the food in his mouth. So he
Speaker 2: was choking literally with a piece of my hair all
Speaker 2: the way down his esophagus into his stomach. So some
Speaker 2: so hang on, let me just get this. He was
Speaker 2: trying to pull it out.
Speaker 1: There's a piece of hair in that had made it
Speaker 1: to the stomach, but the other it was attached it.
Speaker 2: It was still in his mouth and so he was
Speaker 2: choking because it was like it was and then he
Speaker 2: started pulling it out and.
Speaker 3: Like a magic treek.
Speaker 2: That makes me feel like I could vomit.
Speaker 3: True story, you know? Was it wiry and had the
Speaker 3: cuticle on the air?
Speaker 2: It tasted like the cuticle.
Speaker 3: I can't cuticle I had.
Speaker 1: I mean, like, this isn't funny. I've had hairs, but
Speaker 1: I had glass ones.
Speaker 3: That's not funny.
Speaker 2: I want to know, what is the worst thing that
Speaker 2: you've found in your food? Well, wasn't a snake's head?
Speaker 2: Not you, but everybody listening. Give us a call. Tell
Speaker 2: us what you found in your food?
Speaker 4: Thirteen one six five, give us a buzz. And if
Speaker 4: you've been to Laura's house and had that pastor, I
Speaker 4: want to know too.
Speaker 2: Do you know what he's never come back for dinner?
Speaker 2: Don't blame me?
Speaker 4: Why do I We're talking what did you find in
Speaker 4: your food? Off the back of a viral story that's
Speaker 4: it's online.
Speaker 2: Oh disgusting. There was a snakehead. There was a snakehead
Speaker 2: in an in flight meal. And it's like a snakehead
Speaker 2: and also part of the length of the body. It's
Speaker 2: a disgusting is it?
Speaker 1: Is it somewhat surprising that I wasn't surprised by that
Speaker 1: because I've never heard of the airline, so it was
Speaker 1: questionable to start with.
Speaker 2: But like, I feel like I don't get shocked as
Speaker 2: much anymore because so many crazy things. I was like, oh,
Speaker 2: sneaked food. Do you know what's still shocked? I mean
Speaker 2: a bug, fine, cockroach, I understand, a maggot, I understand
Speaker 2: that too. There a snakehead? Are you kidding?
Speaker 1: Controversially, I think I would rather a cockroach. No, I'd
Speaker 1: rather snakehead than a cockroach.
Speaker 2: I'd rather cockroach.
Speaker 4: Well, let's see what Ruby has to say. Thirteen one
Speaker 4: six five He roobs, what did you find in your food?
Speaker 5: So when I was about ten, I found I found
Speaker 5: his cigarette, but in my.
Speaker 1: K chip cooked in Sure, it wasn't just like one
Speaker 1: of those crispy little ones that makes us way too wrow.
Speaker 6: It was definitely a cigarette, but had it been bad
Speaker 6: at that secret and it was disgusting.
Speaker 2: So you didn't eat it. It didn't make it to
Speaker 2: your mouth, no, but she made it all the way
Speaker 2: to the bottom to find it. That's bad enough.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I did realize tobacco is one of the secrets seven.
Speaker 2: That's how they can't tell anyone.
Speaker 3: All right, let's go to Vivian. Hello, Vivian, you're on
Speaker 3: the air. What did you find in your food?
Speaker 6: Viv So, I was three years ago. I was getting
Speaker 6: to the bottom of my pride, right and I a pubic.
Speaker 2: Okay, here's my question, Vivian. How did you know it
Speaker 2: was a puk hare?
Speaker 6: Well, it's very easy to tell whether it because if
Speaker 6: it's straight, then you know it's like.
Speaker 1: Mitch also had one, and the reason he could differentiate
Speaker 1: it was that it had the cuticle attached a white bit.
Speaker 7: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Oh, I didn't really want to look too much further
Speaker 6: into it, but yeah, I told the waitress and she
Speaker 6: was like, oh, so sorry, Like, do you want me
Speaker 6: to get your new meal? And I was like, I've already.
Speaker 8: Eaten, like.
Speaker 2: Eating, What do you think do you think? Here's my question.
Speaker 2: Do you think someone's plucking them out and putting them
Speaker 2: in your food? Or is it an accident?
Speaker 1: I reckon they put the hand down, had a little
Speaker 1: scratch and it made its way out.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's very bad. I don't think it's like Salt Bay.
Speaker 4: How let's go to Charlotte on thirteen one six Charlotte,
Speaker 4: what did you find in your food?
Speaker 9: Hey guys, I this was many years ago when KFC
Speaker 9: crushes there still around me.
Speaker 8: So I went through the drive through and I got.
Speaker 9: My drink and I went to put my straw in
Speaker 9: as do, and I realized that like nothing was coming
Speaker 9: through this straw, Like this straw was locked, and it's
Speaker 9: like quite a sick straw because it's like a thick shake.
Speaker 8: And I opened the lid to have.
Speaker 9: A look, and I was kind of swirling around with
Speaker 9: this straw, and to my surprise, I found about i'd
Speaker 9: stay in between about ten to twenty open sealt packet
Speaker 9: inside my drink.
Speaker 2: Open just wait closed, Yeah, it's closed or open like
Speaker 2: the little ones that you get to you know, garnish.
Speaker 8: Yeah, like those little ones.
Speaker 9: They weren't open, So it didn't taste twenty like it
Speaker 9: was still like enclosed, but it was just full of
Speaker 9: salt packets.
Speaker 8: And it was incredibly perplexing.
Speaker 2: Someone's obviously been using it, you know how you just
Speaker 2: like use it to store it.
Speaker 1: Someone's obviously throwing heats of salt packets in little seven
Speaker 1: seventeen year old Frank didn't know it.
Speaker 2: He picked up the sick shake cup, whacked it straight under,
Speaker 2: and those cars four dollars an hour. I don't know any.
Speaker 1: Yeah, point, Actually that's what you've taken from this story, Laura.
Speaker 2: Well, I think is the common denominator. Here is what
Speaker 2: I'm getting.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I completely agree.
Speaker 4: We got one more Laura on thirteen one, I six five,
Speaker 4: Hello Laura? What did you find in your food?
Speaker 5: A metal nail?
Speaker 1: What was the food?
Speaker 5: A vegetarian pizza. It was like a screw that you
Speaker 5: screw into something. I actually bit down and thought it
Speaker 5: was a olive pick, and I kept biting and then
Speaker 5: I'm like, no, it's not nice, spout it out and
Speaker 5: it was a nail.
Speaker 2: I love me, Like, I'm just going to keep getting
Speaker 2: through this. Pip, this bad boy done for this. Ask
Speaker 2: So Ask and Cart is a segment. I mean, actually
Speaker 2: it's a whole show. We do it every Thursday on
Speaker 2: the podcast. It's where you all right in your deep,
Speaker 2: your dark, you're burning questions and we do our absolute
Speaker 2: best to answer them. I have one today. Oh good.
Speaker 2: I'm glad when it came for I bring in a
Speaker 2: different kind.
Speaker 1: Of question today, whe I think is pretty relatable. I
Speaker 1: am gonna summarize it because it was quite long. Yeah,
Speaker 1: one woman has hired someone on behalf of her friend.
Speaker 1: A woman owns a business. Her really good friend came
Speaker 1: to her and said, my friend's out of work. Can
Speaker 1: you help her out? She's got a family, she needs help.
Speaker 1: So the friend said, yep, I'm going to employ her.
Speaker 1: I'll do you a favor and give her a job
Speaker 1: because she came with a recommendation. Yeah, of course, three
Speaker 1: months in and this friend that she's hired is not
Speaker 1: right for the job. She's not doing a good job,
Speaker 1: she's a bit weird, doesn't fit in as well. Now
Speaker 1: she doesn't know what to do because she's like, if
Speaker 1: I hired this woman, if I just hide her off
Speaker 1: the job application, I wouldn't have her work for me
Speaker 1: because she's not right. But she doesn't feel like she
Speaker 1: can fire her or let her go because she's done
Speaker 1: a favor for a friend and she wants to know
Speaker 1: what to do.
Speaker 2: And I guess also if she's been out of work
Speaker 2: and her friends recommended her, because she's having and going
Speaker 2: through a bit of a hard time.
Speaker 1: So she's going through a hard personal time. Yes, so
Speaker 1: it's this is a super tricky situation.
Speaker 2: Business owner, Laura, I am, but I think it's it's difficult,
Speaker 2: especially when you own a small business. Ultimately, you have
Speaker 2: to do what's right for the business. And you can't
Speaker 2: employ someone and keep someone employed just out of the
Speaker 2: goodness of your own heart.
Speaker 1: Well, it's not like it's Amazon with twenty five thousand
Speaker 1: arrows around the world.
Speaker 2: No, And I think it's different. Like sometimes when you
Speaker 2: have a big company, like employees who aren't necessarily like
Speaker 2: stepping up or like doing a good job can kind
Speaker 2: of it can go unnoticed. But when you're a small company,
Speaker 2: if someone's not doing a good job, it's very very obvious.
Speaker 2: My thought first, before you fire her, before you just
Speaker 2: get rid of her, is is she trainable? Or is
Speaker 2: this person you've employed, like can you upskill them? Can
Speaker 2: you do something to make them be more proactive in
Speaker 2: the role? Are they able to you know, improve And
Speaker 2: if that's not a possibility or that seems too hard
Speaker 2: for you, or you're not able to provide them with
Speaker 2: the training, you have to let them go. I think one,
Speaker 2: you need to have a review.
Speaker 1: Now, maybe you don't do reviews at your work, but
Speaker 1: make it up. Just say it's time for your three
Speaker 1: monthly review. We do one every twelve weeks when you start.
Speaker 2: Let's we've just started weekly.
Speaker 3: And if I don't like it, you get fired. That's
Speaker 3: what happened to that.
Speaker 1: And then treat her like a normal employee. Of course
Speaker 1: she's a friend of a friend, but treat it like
Speaker 1: an employee. And then just say, hey, these are the
Speaker 1: things I think we can work on.
Speaker 2: I don't think your meeting. Do you think you can
Speaker 2: come to the table?
Speaker 1: And then you're gonna have to reevaluate, make up another
Speaker 1: of you at six months reevaluate?
Speaker 3: What is hard?
Speaker 10: Though?
Speaker 3: Like because it's a friend.
Speaker 4: What if I lost my job here at Kiss, here
Speaker 4: at the radio station Laura, and I had to be
Speaker 4: hired at Tony MA to make next?
Speaker 2: What would you do at Tony May? Tell me what
Speaker 2: you would do for a job.
Speaker 3: I'd hammer the stones into the silver.
Speaker 2: If you're not kidding, Hi, I don't know if I
Speaker 2: can upskill you to try.
Speaker 1: You would be on the street brooking that jewelry.
Speaker 2: Yeah if you yeah, Look, I mean I have seen
Speaker 2: you as the cash cock and I know that you
Speaker 2: would do well. If you could dress up in something
Speaker 2: and sell some jewelry for me, that would be fine.
Speaker 3: Tony mad mascot. It's just you meet with theek ma ife.
Speaker 1: You guys do have questions, ride them in. You can
Speaker 1: send them to Life on Cut podcasts on Instagram. Just
Speaker 1: put an ask gun card and we're going to do
Speaker 1: our best to help you out.
Speaker 2: I have something I want to ask you, and you also,
Speaker 2: I feel like you would be a firm No, you
Speaker 2: might be a maybe. Oh yeah, she's pointing aggressively. I
Speaker 2: know when you're a mate. Okay. There is a trend
Speaker 2: on TikTok at the moment another I love a tick
Speaker 2: ill a TikTok trend. I'm a TikTok over here. Okay,
Speaker 2: no one says that, by the way, I'm a TikTok.
Speaker 2: The thirty six year old mom, I'm a TikTok. The
Speaker 2: TikTok the other day and someone, yeah, I know it's disgusting,
Speaker 2: isn't it. We really need to stop. Okay. So there
Speaker 2: is a new trend and it is called peraneum sunning.
Speaker 2: Now does one know what is like what the paranem is? Yes,
Speaker 2: So I feel like I'm money, like I shouldn't say,
Speaker 2: I might need to give a biology lesson, but I
Speaker 2: didn't know what it was and I had to look
Speaker 2: it up. If you don't know what a paranem is,
Speaker 2: it's it's the bit of skin in between your legs
Speaker 2: that's not a functioning hole.
Speaker 1: It's like the gateway between the front and the back.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's the smooth passage. So basically, the TikTok trend
Speaker 2: is that you need to go out into the sun
Speaker 2: for ten minutes every day and present your backside, your
Speaker 2: backside hole to the sun. And that is like a
Speaker 2: way of increasing your vibrations. Let me go into that
Speaker 2: a little bit more in a second. The sunlight is
Speaker 2: meant to be invigorating, it's meant to help bring more joy,
Speaker 2: more happiness to your life. It's meant to be an
Speaker 2: incredible way of getting extra vitamin D. So instead of
Speaker 2: being out in the sunlight for half an hour or
Speaker 2: you just have to do ten minutes. I don't believe
Speaker 2: a word of this. So this is the thing. This
Speaker 2: has millions of views on tit.
Speaker 3: I don't get that. I don't have a mental image.
Speaker 3: Are you on your stomach?
Speaker 1: You'll get no, you'd have to be on your back
Speaker 1: and put your legs up there.
Speaker 2: That's where it is. There are so many videos this
Speaker 2: one woman is. I can show you the video image. Yes, sure,
Speaker 2: she's just just like bent over and she's just presenting
Speaker 2: herself to the sun.
Speaker 11: But here it goes, Hi, I just wanted to let
Speaker 11: those know about the ladistage comparing me on sums where
Speaker 11: you expose your bonhole to for thirty seconds se equivalent
Speaker 11: walking around with your cloison your sun all day, sucking
Speaker 11: it up.
Speaker 2: D sucking it up. The thing that's so problematic is
Speaker 2: they kids are in the background jumping into the pool. Okay,
Speaker 2: But the reason why I say, but.
Speaker 1: I think this is a load of rubbies.
Speaker 2: Well, the reason why I saw this and then I
Speaker 2: had to tell you all, it's because quite a while ago,
Speaker 2: much like obviously pre matt pre me falling in love
Speaker 2: with the beautiful Mattie Jay, I dated a guy who
Speaker 2: now lives in Bali and he talks about peraneum sunning
Speaker 2: on his Instagram account all the time and post photos
Speaker 2: of him just lying outside with his legs in the air.
Speaker 1: You know why I'm calling that this woman that you
Speaker 1: just played is just like absolutely full of it.
Speaker 2: Son I was gonna say, son, I was gonna say
Speaker 2: sahr t. But that would have been pretty funny. Do
Speaker 2: you know why? Because she's bending.
Speaker 1: Over backwards And this is just because you know, I
Speaker 1: did a degree in this, not parandem, sonning, but the body.
Speaker 1: If you've been on a backwards your parandem can't even
Speaker 1: see the sun unless the sun is just rising.
Speaker 2: Like, that's not She's like, I'm stunning my butt. That's
Speaker 2: not your paranem so you're not getting any benefit. Yeah,
Speaker 2: if you're bent right down, I think she's quite flexible.
Speaker 2: She's right down, her backside is right, she's yea.
Speaker 1: Unless she's doing a headstand and the sun is coming
Speaker 1: in horizontally.
Speaker 2: She's not hitting that parande and baby sun is rising
Speaker 2: and she's doing a downward dog. The last thing I
Speaker 2: want to say on this is, Okay, no one likes
Speaker 2: to get sunburned. I'm guessing it's an area you can't
Speaker 2: slather on the sunscreen. Imagine getting a sunburn bum hole.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, babe, can you get me out of
Speaker 3: you in the kitchen.
Speaker 2: You're absolutely right, Laura, this is something that I would
Speaker 2: not do. No Mitch, would you which I think he's
Speaker 2: a maybe.
Speaker 3: Laura, you know it too well. I'm a maybe. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I'm a solid maybe. Britnnan Hockley. Get this off your chest.
Speaker 3: There's been something Laura that she's been rabbiting on. I
Speaker 3: got a story. I got a story she hasn't told us.
Speaker 3: Now is your title?
Speaker 1: It's funny you say chested. Let me get something off
Speaker 1: my chest because it was on my chest. I recently
Speaker 1: got a massage. I love massages. There's nothing I could
Speaker 1: have one every day of my life. You know, some
Speaker 1: people don't like to be touched. They get touched out.
Speaker 1: People cannot touch me enough.
Speaker 2: I remember you one saying I'm going to get a
Speaker 2: massage because I just want someone to touch me. I
Speaker 2: was like, don't app me on the show.
Speaker 1: Sorry, that makes me sound pretty desperate to come here.
Speaker 2: I'll cut you.
Speaker 1: Yes, we can do with my love language.
Speaker 2: Guys, it's physical touch and I don't get that. That's
Speaker 2: why I'm obsessed with my dog. Anyway, we're trailing, not okay,
Speaker 2: but you went and you had a massage recently. It
Speaker 2: was amazing. Rub me down.
Speaker 3: I can take you back, hod and I have some
Speaker 3: tell us what happened, but the cowbell.
Speaker 2: And that didn't really see the scene. Am I in Switzerland,
Speaker 2: in the country scottis Land? I don't.
Speaker 1: So I'm having this beautiful message. It's quite sensual, deep
Speaker 1: tissue and feeling really good.
Speaker 2: Does the old would you flip over? Now, lay on
Speaker 2: your back, please close your eyes and relax.
Speaker 7: I flip over, and then out of nowhere, she starts
Speaker 7: to massage my breasts, very essentially big round, circular motions.
Speaker 1: Now I'm trying to you know, something starts to happen
Speaker 1: and you don't know under my little eyemask, my eyes
Speaker 1: were boulging out of my head way.
Speaker 2: I would like you to ask if she could massage
Speaker 2: your boobs.
Speaker 1: No, it just happened. Now, I want to be clear here.
Speaker 1: You could have been breastfeeding.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well my What what I.
Speaker 1: Want to say is it took me by surprise, but
Speaker 1: it felt very good. So I was having this internal
Speaker 1: monologue of like, I don't know if this is normal.
Speaker 2: I'm definitely not paying.
Speaker 3: Extra you conflicted.
Speaker 1: I was conflicted because also I was like, I'm going
Speaker 1: to roll with this right now because my breast was sore.
Speaker 1: I've been doing push ups. It felt really nice and real.
Speaker 1: It wasn't sexual at all. I guess she was just like,
Speaker 1: it's another some lumps of body here, I'm going to massage.
Speaker 3: But what did you book? Did you book the tip massage?
Speaker 3: Or what did you get? Headsholders back? Yep, there was.
Speaker 1: I didn't get headshotter back to here.
Speaker 3: I haven't seen that one.
Speaker 2: No, that was not on the menu.
Speaker 1: But I got a full body, and I guess I
Speaker 1: guess as a technicality, this is a full body.
Speaker 2: But my wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, you as somebody
Speaker 2: who goes and gets a lot of massages all the time,
Speaker 2: not stand how many times? Yes, how many times? Has
Speaker 2: this happened?
Speaker 3: Twice?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 1: And the second time it happened, I got washed down,
Speaker 1: like someone had to wash something off me. They stood
Speaker 1: me up and they threw buckets of water on me.
Speaker 2: That was a whole other experience. I feel like massages though,
Speaker 2: like you never really kind of walk in there and
Speaker 2: no exactly what's going to happen. Things always get a
Speaker 2: bit weird. I once had someone put on their gloves
Speaker 2: like they massage my whole body. That's always a worry.
Speaker 2: And then and then towards the end, she walked over
Speaker 2: to the basin and she put on plastic gloves and
Speaker 2: then she and I was like, what are we doing that?
Speaker 2: And she walked back over and then she stuck her
Speaker 2: thumb inside my mouth and massaged my cheeks from the inside.
Speaker 1: See, I've actually had that.
Speaker 3: That's good.
Speaker 2: I needn't ask. Imagine going to a massage parlor and
Speaker 2: someone not even saying can I please put my fingers
Speaker 2: in your mouth? Can I massage your breast?
Speaker 1: But that's my question, right, should this be something that's
Speaker 1: expected in a full body massage, as it is part
Speaker 1: of your body, or should it be something that's asked.
Speaker 1: Because I rolled with it and it was fine. I'm
Speaker 1: not complaining, Okay, it just took me by surprise.
Speaker 2: And I don't know if it's standard as someone who's
Speaker 2: had two kids and has very much breastfed two children.
Speaker 2: If someone just you can't just go there.
Speaker 6: No.
Speaker 4: When I was in Barley with you guys recently a
Speaker 4: couple of months ago, I had the disposable undisign you know,
Speaker 4: that massage melt away with one drop of water as
Speaker 4: she has time for a shower, and a shower were halfway.
Speaker 4: She puts me in the shower and turns on the
Speaker 4: forcets for me and stands there with her arms crossed. Well,
Speaker 4: watching your shower, Miss trench pull put me on the
Speaker 4: choky Matilda, I'm like, and she stood there.
Speaker 3: So I just went under the water and showered in
Speaker 3: front of her.
Speaker 1: So you decided to shower and dissolve your undies while
Speaker 1: she watched.
Speaker 2: You think you were going to steal the dissolvable undies?
Speaker 7: What was that?
Speaker 2: You can take them home? Or does she want to
Speaker 2: make sure you wash yourself down?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 3: I think she wanted to make sure I got the
Speaker 3: oil off. I don't know. It's very uncomfortable.
Speaker 1: Well, this is the question, right, I think a lot
Speaker 1: of stuff goes down in the massage part.
Speaker 2: Yes, so I reckon, let's put the call out. Yeah, body,
Speaker 2: every single person has had a weird message story.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I agree. What happens to you in the massage parlor?
Speaker 2: And it is it okay to just go straight for
Speaker 2: the boob kill. We don't know what the real sordid things.
Speaker 2: If you've been doing some things that some massage parlors
Speaker 2: don't cause about those ones, we want the funny story.
Speaker 2: Do that in private.
Speaker 3: We'll take your calls.
Speaker 4: Next we're talking just before Welcome to the lifelunk cut
Speaker 4: Massage Parlor.
Speaker 1: I love the background music that you've put on for
Speaker 1: these Yes, guys, I went and treated myself to a massage.
Speaker 2: I like to be touched.
Speaker 1: Physical touches my love language. Sometimes I need to get
Speaker 1: that from someone else. Sometimes I do need to pay them, Yeah,
Speaker 1: of course.
Speaker 4: And when we came to the consensus that everyone has
Speaker 4: had a crazy moment in the massage parlor.
Speaker 1: Has had a crazy moment, I had a little rubdown
Speaker 1: that I didn't know was included in the rubdown.
Speaker 2: Laura, someone put their finger in your mouth at the parlor,
Speaker 2: or Britt had they massaged her breast, is what the
Speaker 2: story was. And then I shared a story about how, yeah,
Speaker 2: somebody put gloves on and then they massaged the inside
Speaker 2: of my cheeks, which I did not know that that
Speaker 2: was a very stressed out area, but apparently so Britten.
Speaker 3: I love it. We get that all the time.
Speaker 2: Oh so we you know what, especially when we talk.
Speaker 1: For a living, I mean, I don't know what you're
Speaker 1: doing with yours mouth, well, but I talk a lot,
Speaker 1: so I think it's you don't know it's sore until
Speaker 1: someone rubs your inside your mouth.
Speaker 3: We put the call out.
Speaker 4: Thirteen one oh sixty five. What happens to here in
Speaker 4: the massage parlor? Bannadette, Hi, Welcome to the show.
Speaker 2: Hi, what happened to you?
Speaker 8: I was having a lovely relaxing message to the time
Speaker 8: message pace and she often I've seen there lots of times,
Speaker 8: and she often just you know, she uses her elbow
Speaker 8: or a little tool, and all of a sudden, when
Speaker 8: she's working in the middle of my back, I fout
Speaker 8: something really sharp and I said, oh, what's that thinking.
Speaker 8: You know, she's found some interesting tool. And she started
Speaker 8: to giggle and just said pimple And she squeezed to.
Speaker 1: I don't even know I had she popped her back
Speaker 1: pimple while a middle of a massage.
Speaker 8: She didn't ask, I don't know she used a tissue.
Speaker 3: Was so glad she giggled.
Speaker 2: She didn't know. She probably didn't use a tissue. If
Speaker 2: she's not asking, she's not getting as it was unintentional.
Speaker 8: No, I think could help deliberate.
Speaker 2: When you see a good pimple, you've just got to go.
Speaker 2: You've got to But I always always pop his pimples
Speaker 2: so much.
Speaker 1: That's okay, because you guys are getting married. This is
Speaker 1: a massage therapist. I don't know if she's like this
Speaker 1: is true.
Speaker 3: Let's go to Cassandra. Cassandra, what happened in the massage parlor?
Speaker 10: I had my eyeball.
Speaker 8: The group smil leads I'm crappy that day, and then
Speaker 8: they aeded to stick their fingers in my ear.
Speaker 2: Oh wait, sorry, they massaged your eyelids and then put
Speaker 2: their fingers into your ear. That's what I heard, right, yes, yes, correct?
Speaker 2: What what happened?
Speaker 1: Once the finger was in the early so they put
Speaker 1: it in.
Speaker 9: There, they pressed really hard, and they pulled it out
Speaker 9: really quick to make like a pop sound.
Speaker 2: It was a qualified massage therapist.
Speaker 8: I don't think so. I think they were running out
Speaker 8: of time. Well, sorry, they were running out of ideas
Speaker 8: of make up.
Speaker 4: They do do those fake cracks, if you notice, even
Speaker 4: with the fingers, they sometimes click their fingers and they go,
Speaker 4: oh good, cracks.
Speaker 2: You just clicked like it's my body. I actually know
Speaker 2: that that didn't crack.
Speaker 3: I can feel it. It didn't crack. That's so funny.
Speaker 3: Thanks Cassandra.
Speaker 4: Let's get a Gabby. I believe is Gabby and we've
Speaker 4: had a masseusee call through.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Gabby's a massuse Gabby.
Speaker 3: From Sasin Massage parlor.
Speaker 2: Hi Gabby, Hi guys, how are you well? I'm great
Speaker 2: because I had a breast massage, so I'm feeling feeling
Speaker 2: a lie.
Speaker 8: Oh my goodness.
Speaker 2: Now that you are here, you can tell us is
Speaker 2: this normal? So Britt went and had a massage done
Speaker 2: and the messus massage her breast without asking.
Speaker 10: Look, that's Kasia.
Speaker 6: No, it's not right.
Speaker 10: I believe that if we are giving this step of massage.
Speaker 6: My boss would be rich by Now I'm not conceptible.
Speaker 9: It's more acceptable.
Speaker 10: And as massage therapy is, we really need to keep
Speaker 10: a clear communication at all times and letting you know
Speaker 10: where we are massaging. So if you come to me
Speaker 10: saying that you're having some pain on your peck muscles,
Speaker 10: we are always dealing with muscles. So you're going to say,
Speaker 10: I'm going to do a proper draping around your peck
Speaker 10: muscles and then massage around it, but never on the breast,
Speaker 10: not even if they ask me.
Speaker 1: Right, So you would you would never say to someone
Speaker 1: as like an option, would you like your breast massage?
Speaker 8: No way, No, way.
Speaker 2: It is weird because that massage parlor brit went to
Speaker 2: was called Happy Ending, so.
Speaker 1: For it was absolutely I'd like to be clear everybody,
Speaker 1: I did not pay There was no Happy Ending.
Speaker 2: I did not pay extra. This was not the thing
Speaker 2: that I went to. Aut free you.
Speaker 4: Want to save message and go see Gabby Life on
Speaker 4: cut is the code discount?
Speaker 2: Thanks buying Yabby. I'm definitely going straight back to that part.
Speaker 3: It's time for a little update. Laura's Intimacy Challenge.
Speaker 2: No, okay, look, I've spoken about this a couple of
Speaker 2: times over the last few weeks. Maddie, Jay and I
Speaker 2: are doing the Intimacy Challenge. Now, if you don't know
Speaker 2: what that is, it is that you have to be
Speaker 2: intimate with your partner every day for thirty days. And
Speaker 2: it might seem that there's so many people out there
Speaker 2: who are not intimate with their partners that they had
Speaker 2: to make a whole challenge around it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but just to be clear, right for those playing
Speaker 1: at home, this does not just mean sex every day.
Speaker 1: This could be any sort of any sort of connection.
Speaker 1: So you didn't discover that until a week in, so
Speaker 1: you thought that you.
Speaker 2: Were grinding every day that was the wrong Pa. Definitely
Speaker 2: not what we're doing. We're essentially loving each other. That's
Speaker 2: too much for if my mum. Probably Okay, So every
Speaker 2: day you have to have or have done something that
Speaker 2: carves out time with your partner. That's intimate time. We
Speaker 2: are coming to the end, you know what, it's actually
Speaker 2: beat As much as I make lots of jokes, it's
Speaker 2: actually been really special because it's it's so easy, especially
Speaker 2: when you have two kids, to just get through the
Speaker 2: days or get through the weeks, and you realize, oh,
Speaker 2: I haven't really kissed my partner today. And as much
Speaker 2: as like, you know, we speak all the time, we
Speaker 2: spend so much time together, it's so easy for days
Speaker 2: to kind of just slip by and you haven't actually
Speaker 2: been intentionally intimate with.
Speaker 1: Your partner or had like any sort of a real
Speaker 1: connection other than like surviving.
Speaker 2: Surviving, or like talking about the kids or talking about work,
Speaker 2: or just like the stuff that doesn't make you feel
Speaker 2: close even though you're spending lots of time together. So
Speaker 2: we've done. We did, We've done the whole gamut. We've
Speaker 2: done everything from oh get a.
Speaker 3: Details, Wow, I didn't think we're going to go We've
Speaker 3: done it all.
Speaker 2: We've done it all, okay, but but as time progressed,
Speaker 2: let me tell you the some of the some of
Speaker 2: the sex challenges stopped and it was more around just
Speaker 2: like staring into each other's eyes and holding hands and
Speaker 2: having kisses and everything else. But the reason why we
Speaker 2: found it really hard to do every single day there
Speaker 2: many I know the reason why it's been so hard
Speaker 2: is because we have a toddler. So I guess my
Speaker 2: question is this is a genuine share a bed without
Speaker 2: our three year old comes and sleeps in our bed
Speaker 2: every night.
Speaker 1: Yes, this is really is a genuine question knowing that
Speaker 1: you have gone in with the intention for thirty days,
Speaker 1: because that is the challenge. Have even though you've been trying,
Speaker 1: Have there been days you've actually missed. Have there been
Speaker 1: days that like, even though it's on your to do list,
Speaker 1: you just haven't.
Speaker 2: Beenn hour to get there. Well, there was two days
Speaker 2: that we missed because Matt was away, so obviously that
Speaker 2: made it a little bit more challenging. But we did
Speaker 2: make time. I you know, I don't know. We did
Speaker 2: make time to have like a lovely face time and
Speaker 2: I'm not talking about a saucy face time, but we
Speaker 2: just we really like spend some time having a catch
Speaker 2: up each other. Three the screen.
Speaker 4: So is there a journal, Laura, like a like a
Speaker 4: sex book class. You're putting this on a calendar, not
Speaker 4: keeping a diary. You're in Shank redemption.
Speaker 8: Do you know what?
Speaker 2: Though, I do want to say this for anybody out
Speaker 2: there who's a couple, you know, and you feel like
Speaker 2: maybe you have lost a little bit a spark in
Speaker 2: your relationship, or you know that you haven't been as
Speaker 2: intimate with your partner as what you would like. It's
Speaker 2: such a good way of just kick starting and being
Speaker 2: really intentional with making time for your for your relationships. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and for me, I guess the biggest thing I've taken
Speaker 2: out of it so far is that when you are
Speaker 2: doing those things and when you are intimate with your partner,
Speaker 2: when you do have the fights or the crappy days
Speaker 2: or the kids are driving you crazy, it just makes
Speaker 2: everything else better.
Speaker 1: Well, I'm happy to hear you've been getting lucky and
Speaker 1: you've button place.
Speaker 3: Should we do it next? The three of us as
Speaker 3: a show couple, as a travel thropple? Should we do
Speaker 3: the intimacy?
Speaker 6: Why not?
Speaker 2: Let's do it. Let's do a pig friend version.
Speaker 10: How do we do that?
Speaker 2: Just stare into each other's eyes and old hands.
Speaker 3: We can cuddle, we can play a vigorous game.
Speaker 2: I don't know, old hands.
Speaker 3: There's nothing wrong with that.
Speaker 2: I'll come up with a list. We'll get back to you.
Speaker 2: I'm just like looking forward to not having to go
Speaker 2: and sneak off into my daughter's bed every summer. Well,
Speaker 2: she's sleeping in hour, so we have to go to hers.
Speaker 2: It's terrible because what is no it's a single bed.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh. Light's enough of the sexy time. That
Speaker 2: is it for us today.
Speaker 1: But we do have a huge announcement in our book
Speaker 1: Life on Cut. We love Love Laura and I we
Speaker 1: did write a book. It is coming out on the fifth.
Speaker 1: We are so so excited about it. This took us
Speaker 1: eighteen months of blood, sweat and tears, some really deep
Speaker 1: parts of us, some light fluffy parts, some funny parts.
Speaker 1: But it is hitting the universe in a few days time.
Speaker 7: It is.
Speaker 2: You can get your like hard copy covered book whatever
Speaker 2: everyone calls it. You don't even have to get a
Speaker 2: kindle version, or you can get the audiobook version. But
Speaker 2: it comes out on Wednesday and there's so much love
Speaker 2: that's gone into this book, and you can jump onto
Speaker 2: life on cutpodcast dot com today you and all the
Speaker 2: details are there.
Speaker 1: Don't forget Tell your mum, tell you dad, tell you dog,
Speaker 1: tell your friends, and share the love because we love love.
Speaker 4: See a Week