WEBVTT - Raygun, Babe, You Okay? 0:00:00.160 --> 0:00:03.800 Life Uncut acknowledges the traditional custodians of country whose lands 0:00:03.840 --> 0:00:06.560 were never seated. We pay our respects to their elders 0:00:06.559 --> 0:00:07.600 past and present. 0:00:07.560 --> 0:00:11.320 Always was, always will be Aboriginal Land. This episode was 0:00:11.360 --> 0:00:23.640 recorded on Cameragle Land. Hi, guys, and welcome back to 0:00:23.680 --> 0:00:26.320 another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura, I'm Brittany, and 0:00:26.360 --> 0:00:28.040 I'm sore, very sore. 0:00:28.160 --> 0:00:32.600 I'm bravo Laura. She did ask me. She goes, I 0:00:32.640 --> 0:00:33.960 don't want to bring it in myself, but can you 0:00:34.000 --> 0:00:38.599 like talk me up? Laura? Did the city serve yesterday Sunday? 0:00:38.680 --> 0:00:41.639 Which is fourteen kilometers in Sydney, a very famous run 0:00:41.680 --> 0:00:42.760 if you're not from this area. 0:00:43.000 --> 0:00:44.960 Ninety thousand people did it yesterday. 0:00:45.000 --> 0:00:47.279 It's insane how many people do it. 0:00:47.760 --> 0:00:50.440 It's no anxiety. Yeah, it was crazy. 0:00:50.479 --> 0:00:52.440 I tried to jog and then there were so many 0:00:52.440 --> 0:00:54.320 people that I couldn't actually get past them, so then 0:00:54.360 --> 0:00:54.840 I gave up. 0:00:54.880 --> 0:00:56.800 But that was only for about maybe fifty meters. 0:00:56.960 --> 0:00:59.280 No, for the first like kilometer or something, don't you 0:00:59.320 --> 0:01:02.320 just have to walk with the masses until everyone disperses 0:01:02.320 --> 0:01:04.280 and the elite athletes like go out in front. 0:01:04.360 --> 0:01:07.399 And then I was also pushing the donkey pram, which 0:01:07.520 --> 0:01:09.559 it self weighs about the amount of a child. 0:01:09.760 --> 0:01:12.560 Why is it called donkey it's the type of pram. 0:01:13.000 --> 0:01:14.640 A donkey pram is like the one that you can 0:01:14.640 --> 0:01:16.880 put two children in and then you can like take 0:01:16.920 --> 0:01:18.280 one seed off and make it smaller. 0:01:18.319 --> 0:01:21.440 You're basically pushing a sled for fourteen kilometers. Yeah, well no, 0:01:21.440 --> 0:01:23.640 because the sled doesn't have wheels. So like you, you 0:01:23.640 --> 0:01:27.000 had Lola, I had Lola. Who what does she weigh? 0:01:27.240 --> 0:01:29.000 I'm not sure on a good day, so fat shame 0:01:29.080 --> 0:01:29.400 my child. 0:01:29.480 --> 0:01:31.679 No, I'm just wanting to know what you had to 0:01:31.800 --> 0:01:32.240 run with. 0:01:32.800 --> 0:01:35.199 I don't know, like fifteen kilos maybe. Yeah, that's also 0:01:35.240 --> 0:01:36.360 like a six kilo pram. 0:01:36.840 --> 0:01:39.400 Yeah, that's insane for someone like you. It's gone from 0:01:39.520 --> 0:01:40.320 zero to one hundred. 0:01:40.360 --> 0:01:40.560 Guys. 0:01:40.600 --> 0:01:43.320 It has wheels like it moves with you, so when 0:01:43.319 --> 0:01:45.160 you push it, you're not pushing twenty kilos. 0:01:45.200 --> 0:01:47.160 I'm confused as why we're trying to set you up 0:01:47.200 --> 0:01:48.560 and you're trying to bring it back down, like we're 0:01:48.560 --> 0:01:50.200 trying to make you sound really good, and you're like, nah, 0:01:50.200 --> 0:01:51.080 I was easy. 0:01:50.880 --> 0:01:54.480 I am Look, I will take you, saying bulk, I 0:01:54.520 --> 0:01:57.480 will take the appreciation the accolades. 0:01:57.480 --> 0:02:00.200 I also took the Participation award at the end. Yeah 0:02:00.200 --> 0:02:00.920 it was great. It was a great day. 0:02:00.960 --> 0:02:02.600 But I woke up this morning and everything hurts, Like 0:02:02.640 --> 0:02:05.120 my hip flexes hurt, my knee hurts, my ass hurts, 0:02:05.160 --> 0:02:06.120 the back of my legs hurt. 0:02:06.160 --> 0:02:07.640 I was like, have I done enough now? 0:02:07.880 --> 0:02:09.200 You mean for twenty twenty four. 0:02:09.320 --> 0:02:10.919 Yeah, I mean it's the most I've done in about 0:02:10.919 --> 0:02:13.200 five years, So I feel like I've really just you know, 0:02:13.560 --> 0:02:16.120 I like to binge exercise. Some people binge drink. I 0:02:16.200 --> 0:02:18.079 binge exercise, and then I'll be done now for the 0:02:18.080 --> 0:02:18.679 next six months. 0:02:18.720 --> 0:02:20.480 You know what's funny is there are people that do 0:02:20.600 --> 0:02:23.080 this amount of exercise every single day, but you're like, 0:02:23.080 --> 0:02:25.320 that's my binge. Like people run fourteen klongs a day 0:02:25.360 --> 0:02:27.480 every day, but you're like, I'm done. I binged it, 0:02:27.560 --> 0:02:28.760 I went hard. That's me done. 0:02:28.760 --> 0:02:28.919 For me. 0:02:29.320 --> 0:02:33.200 Doing it with children was just it adds a whole 0:02:33.240 --> 0:02:33.720 other level. 0:02:33.760 --> 0:02:35.800 It's like an obstacle course when you actually have kids 0:02:35.800 --> 0:02:37.880 with you, because they need to stop, they need to pee, 0:02:37.919 --> 0:02:41.480 they want water, they want snacks. There's portaloos along the walk, 0:02:41.600 --> 0:02:44.200 and then there's like water stations along the walk. But 0:02:44.280 --> 0:02:46.440 when you have a kid and the lines I'm talking 0:02:46.480 --> 0:02:50.760 like the portoloo line was, yeah, one hundred people waiting 0:02:50.800 --> 0:02:52.079 for a portoloo, right, it's. 0:02:51.960 --> 0:02:53.040 A long, long line. 0:02:53.080 --> 0:02:53.800 Think of the COVID. 0:02:54.040 --> 0:02:55.160 Lola is three years old. 0:02:55.360 --> 0:02:58.240 She doesn't have the bladder retention of someone who can 0:02:58.280 --> 0:03:00.959 wait in one hundred person deep line. So we're walking 0:03:01.000 --> 0:03:03.480 along and I was like, Mummy, I need you do 0:03:03.520 --> 0:03:06.240 a we we. I was like, okay, we'll find somewhere, 0:03:06.840 --> 0:03:07.440 and she's. 0:03:07.240 --> 0:03:08.720 Like, but it's coming out. 0:03:08.840 --> 0:03:10.960 I was like, okay, we have no spare pants. 0:03:11.080 --> 0:03:13.400 So I picked her up and I ran her straight 0:03:13.440 --> 0:03:14.880 to the side of the road and pulled her pants 0:03:14.919 --> 0:03:17.000 down like next to a bush. And then I looked 0:03:17.040 --> 0:03:19.040 up and there's like five police officers and a police 0:03:19.040 --> 0:03:21.360 cart just right there, and she's peeing in a bush. 0:03:21.520 --> 0:03:22.880 She got arrested for public. 0:03:26.680 --> 0:03:29.160 She was peeing over a bush in front of the 0:03:29.160 --> 0:03:32.000 police officers and they all just looked at her like well, 0:03:32.080 --> 0:03:32.560 then it's. 0:03:32.520 --> 0:03:35.080 Like, what am I going to do? Arrest of the 0:03:35.080 --> 0:03:36.880 three year old or arrest me? Like who's getting a 0:03:36.880 --> 0:03:37.360 ticket for that? 0:03:37.720 --> 0:03:39.880 Can you imagine Ifla was like, man, you're gonna have 0:03:39.920 --> 0:03:40.520 to cut with us. 0:03:40.800 --> 0:03:42.760 But she was like butt facing them as well, Like 0:03:42.800 --> 0:03:45.080 it was a full bird's eye for these poor police officers. 0:03:45.120 --> 0:03:46.760 They just turned around and pretend like they didn't see. 0:03:46.920 --> 0:03:49.920 I think three year olds get a little bit of leeway. Yeah, 0:03:49.960 --> 0:03:51.920 like you were allowed if you went and pulled your 0:03:51.920 --> 0:03:54.720 pants down. This is age discrimination. 0:03:55.320 --> 0:03:58.320 Anyway, it was a really eventful day, guys, but we 0:03:58.360 --> 0:04:00.640 made it to the end. I got myself sizzle and 0:04:00.640 --> 0:04:01.360 that's all about it. 0:04:01.440 --> 0:04:03.720 I did see that. Congratulations, Very happy for you. I 0:04:03.840 --> 0:04:06.920 definitely did not do the city to surf. I look 0:04:06.960 --> 0:04:08.360 at it now and get a little bit of anxiety 0:04:08.360 --> 0:04:11.000 with how many people are in there. Maybe next year 0:04:11.000 --> 0:04:13.760 I'll think about it. But the funniest thing happened to me. 0:04:14.080 --> 0:04:18.320 So I had run into these two guys like multiple 0:04:18.360 --> 0:04:21.640 times in this one day, and they're just friends. But 0:04:22.000 --> 0:04:24.440 I know them because I see them so much around, 0:04:24.480 --> 0:04:26.839 But I don't know them, okay, Like I just you're like, 0:04:26.880 --> 0:04:30.080 oh hey. So i'd seen them at the gym, and 0:04:30.120 --> 0:04:32.280 then I had seen them later on in the sauna, 0:04:32.520 --> 0:04:34.280 and then I had seen them at a coffee shop, 0:04:34.320 --> 0:04:35.960 and then that was in the morning. Then later that 0:04:36.000 --> 0:04:39.040 afternoon I saw them at a different coffee shop, and 0:04:39.080 --> 0:04:41.479 I said as a joke as they walked past, I 0:04:41.520 --> 0:04:43.840 was like, one of us needs to get a job, 0:04:43.880 --> 0:04:46.640 don't we And they're like yeah, laughs, you know, like 0:04:46.720 --> 0:04:50.240 classic dad joke was done with it. And they're very 0:04:50.320 --> 0:04:53.320 like one is a bit smaller and skinny with like 0:04:53.920 --> 0:04:55.720 not much hair, and one is like quite a big 0:04:55.800 --> 0:04:58.280 muscling man. So they're really quite stand up. And then 0:04:58.640 --> 0:05:01.840 later on I was driving up the street and I 0:05:01.880 --> 0:05:04.320 saw them again, like on the side of the road, 0:05:04.560 --> 0:05:07.800 walking from behind. So I thought it'd be funny, and 0:05:07.800 --> 0:05:11.679 I put my window down and yelled out get a job. 0:05:12.839 --> 0:05:20.760 And I looked at them and it wasn't them. I 0:05:21.000 --> 0:05:23.160 just looked and abuse too strange as I was like, 0:05:23.240 --> 0:05:26.359 get that job, yeah, stink is wasn't them, that's not 0:05:26.600 --> 0:05:29.480 and I was it was so funny, but like in 0:05:29.520 --> 0:05:32.520 a non funny way. If something can be not funny funny, 0:05:32.600 --> 0:05:35.560 this is it. There wasn't enough time to stop and explain, 0:05:35.720 --> 0:05:42.240 so I was like, just drove off and that was it. 0:05:43.120 --> 0:05:45.200 That was what I did. I abuse someone and don't 0:05:45.240 --> 0:05:46.760 what if they just got made redundant. 0:05:46.880 --> 0:05:49.560 There's so many variables here about how that could be 0:05:49.760 --> 0:05:54.039 so inappropriate, but also imagine being the person who Brittany 0:05:54.080 --> 0:05:57.280 Hardly just wound down the window and screen like that 0:05:57.400 --> 0:05:58.599 dash a moment. 0:05:59.480 --> 0:06:03.840 So much they recognize you, I hope so much that 0:06:03.880 --> 0:06:07.280 their group chats right now are pretty abused. 0:06:07.480 --> 0:06:09.640 Do you know when you have those moments in life 0:06:10.240 --> 0:06:12.159 where like, you think back to the moment and you 0:06:12.200 --> 0:06:14.599 still die inside Every time I think about it, I 0:06:14.600 --> 0:06:17.040 am horrified at myself because there's no way for me 0:06:17.560 --> 0:06:20.080 to explain to these people. I will never find them again, 0:06:20.360 --> 0:06:22.679 and they will die thinking that I think they're lazy fucker? 0:06:22.720 --> 0:06:31.240 Is ah? That was my weekend, Oh dear, So Ben 0:06:31.279 --> 0:06:32.839 and I were just having this discussion. So I do 0:06:32.920 --> 0:06:35.720 have a question for you, both of you, Keisha and Laura. 0:06:36.160 --> 0:06:39.200 Super random has nothing to do with anything great, but 0:06:39.279 --> 0:06:41.120 I was driving to it this morning and Ben, this 0:06:41.160 --> 0:06:43.480 is when Better and I have our most profound conversations. 0:06:43.760 --> 0:06:45.840 You know how there's that conversation people always say, like, oh, 0:06:45.880 --> 0:06:47.520 if you could find out when you were going to die, 0:06:47.560 --> 0:06:51.359 would you if you could find out if there was 0:06:51.400 --> 0:06:54.160 something that said when you turn eighteen in life, you 0:06:54.200 --> 0:06:57.200 could find out exactly when you're going to meet the 0:06:57.200 --> 0:06:58.560 love of your life. Like you were going to meet 0:06:58.560 --> 0:07:00.800 your person, but you didn't have after you could tick 0:07:00.920 --> 0:07:04.039 yes or no, would you find out? Would you want 0:07:04.040 --> 0:07:09.000 to know when exactly like the year, the month you'd 0:07:09.040 --> 0:07:09.640 meet your person? 0:07:09.880 --> 0:07:12.720 No, because then you would meet some random dude and 0:07:12.760 --> 0:07:14.880 you'd be like, well, I guess you're my person because 0:07:15.040 --> 0:07:18.360 that thing when I turned eighteen told me, and you 0:07:18.480 --> 0:07:20.600 settled like one day too early, and then you ended 0:07:20.680 --> 0:07:21.920 up marrying fucking Fred. 0:07:22.360 --> 0:07:24.680 You're like, shit, it's fuck it, this is. 0:07:24.680 --> 0:07:25.280 All it is. 0:07:25.440 --> 0:07:27.240 And really you were supposed to marry David, but he 0:07:27.280 --> 0:07:29.520 was coming two days later, I don't know, or like 0:07:29.560 --> 0:07:30.200 an hour later. 0:07:30.280 --> 0:07:32.080 I don't know. I don't want to know. I also 0:07:32.160 --> 0:07:32.880 want the lessons. 0:07:32.920 --> 0:07:35.480 I think, like, as much as the heartbreak sucks, and 0:07:35.520 --> 0:07:37.320 as much as all of the things I've been through 0:07:37.360 --> 0:07:38.840 my twenties, at the time, I would have been like, 0:07:38.880 --> 0:07:40.840 would love to have skipped this, they were. 0:07:40.680 --> 0:07:44.040 All necessary learnings. As annoying as that sounds, that's. 0:07:43.840 --> 0:07:46.440 So funny because I was like, Oh, I'm going to 0:07:46.480 --> 0:07:48.040 ask the girls this, but I know what Laura's gonna say. 0:07:48.040 --> 0:07:49.760 She's a control freak. She'll be like, fuck yeah, give 0:07:49.760 --> 0:07:50.160 me a minute. 0:07:50.200 --> 0:07:52.880 I'm never you only think I'm a control freak because 0:07:52.880 --> 0:07:54.680 I like to put out a good product when it 0:07:54.680 --> 0:07:56.920 comes to the podcast, But in every other aspect of life, 0:07:56.920 --> 0:07:57.880 I am not a control forreak. 0:07:57.960 --> 0:08:00.120 No, I just I genuinely just thought if you you 0:08:00.160 --> 0:08:03.200 when your person was coming, that you'd pick it. And 0:08:03.280 --> 0:08:04.640 it's personality dependent. 0:08:04.800 --> 0:08:07.720 Like I've often said that, I don't think everyone has 0:08:07.800 --> 0:08:10.920 to have dated shit people to appreciate good, but I 0:08:10.960 --> 0:08:12.920 think Laura and I is I'm like, fuck me up. 0:08:13.560 --> 0:08:14.600 It's the only way I learned. 0:08:14.720 --> 0:08:16.880 I think that was the only way that I realized 0:08:16.880 --> 0:08:18.640 what a healthy relation that was. 0:08:22.560 --> 0:08:24.120 Fuck me in, fuck me up, I. 0:08:24.120 --> 0:08:28.600 Literally do some damage. I'm ready, I need therapy. That 0:08:28.760 --> 0:08:30.760 was my twenties. That was my whole twenties. I was like, 0:08:30.760 --> 0:08:33.320 how much can you hurt me before I learn the lessons? 0:08:34.840 --> 0:08:36.679 Here we are? I wasn't that deep. 0:08:36.760 --> 0:08:39.319 I mean a part of me wishes I didn't have 0:08:39.400 --> 0:08:43.160 to go through some of those experiences, but maybe I 0:08:43.200 --> 0:08:44.719 don't know. I am the type of person who kind 0:08:44.720 --> 0:08:47.040 of says like I think I had to so that 0:08:47.080 --> 0:08:50.720 I appreciated good because I really liked the people who 0:08:50.920 --> 0:08:52.960 let Laura says, fuck you up, like they give you 0:08:53.000 --> 0:08:55.160 the highs and the lows, and that taught me to 0:08:55.240 --> 0:08:57.000 appreciate a good relation totally. 0:08:57.000 --> 0:08:59.320 And obviously we can take this in a very serious way, 0:08:59.360 --> 0:08:59.960 like there's. 0:09:00.000 --> 0:09:02.240 It's hypothetical, guys, you can't tick a box. 0:09:02.360 --> 0:09:04.520 No, I know, but there's gonna be someone who's listening 0:09:04.600 --> 0:09:06.480 to that and is like we speak about so much 0:09:06.520 --> 0:09:09.200 around like the different kinds of relationships we talk about 0:09:09.200 --> 0:09:13.480 domestic violence. I'm not talking about that type of toxic relationship. 0:09:14.000 --> 0:09:15.560 I want to put the caveat there because I know 0:09:15.600 --> 0:09:17.080 that there would be someone who would hear that and 0:09:17.120 --> 0:09:19.800 be like, well, that doesn't make sense, Laura. I went 0:09:19.880 --> 0:09:23.840 through some very toxic relationships that I very much opted 0:09:23.880 --> 0:09:26.400 into that. I saw the red flags and I ran 0:09:26.480 --> 0:09:31.320 gleefully into those red flags and wrapped myself in them. 0:09:31.720 --> 0:09:34.480 Like, Laura, I do not want you to stop coming, 0:09:34.559 --> 0:09:35.520 and you're like, I'm taking. 0:09:35.280 --> 0:09:35.920 My clothes off. 0:09:36.160 --> 0:09:36.880 It's coming up. 0:09:37.120 --> 0:09:37.560 Literally. 0:09:37.920 --> 0:09:40.120 He was like, I will probably cheat on you. Hear 0:09:40.320 --> 0:09:42.199 all of the women that I've cheated on in the past. 0:09:42.200 --> 0:09:44.320 He's my ex wife who I cheated on ten times. 0:09:44.520 --> 0:09:47.360 And I was like, I'll be the exit change. I'll 0:09:47.480 --> 0:09:51.120 change him. Fuck me up, pretty fuck me up, Scotty Gotti, 0:09:51.280 --> 0:09:52.520 fucking whatever? Would you do? 0:09:53.360 --> 0:09:55.400 I know I would not. I said I would not. 0:09:55.600 --> 0:09:58.320 There's no way I would want to know because well, 0:09:58.320 --> 0:10:00.040 I mean for everything that you just said, But like, 0:10:00.120 --> 0:10:02.120 I think it changes your whole path. I don't think 0:10:02.160 --> 0:10:04.480 you would. You wouldn't be dating seriously. You wouldn't be 0:10:04.480 --> 0:10:07.079 wanting because you have to date seriously to learn what 0:10:07.120 --> 0:10:09.680 you want what you don't want. Ben was like, I said, 0:10:09.679 --> 0:10:12.200 would you want to know? He's like, fuck, yeah, And 0:10:12.240 --> 0:10:13.760 I was like, you'd want to know to the month 0:10:14.040 --> 0:10:15.800 And he's like yeah, And I was like why And 0:10:15.800 --> 0:10:17.600 he's like, because then you could just fuck for ten years. 0:10:17.600 --> 0:10:19.400 He's like, you could just not. Well, he's like, if 0:10:19.400 --> 0:10:21.680 you know that they're not going to be your person, 0:10:22.000 --> 0:10:24.160 I think it would take a certain element of pressure away. 0:10:24.160 --> 0:10:26.040 Though. You know, if you knew that it was going 0:10:26.080 --> 0:10:28.079 to happen at a certain time, you'd be like, oh, 0:10:28.200 --> 0:10:29.920 that's okay, I don't need to worry about like what 0:10:29.960 --> 0:10:32.880 I'm experiencing. Like if you're an anxious person, it would 0:10:32.880 --> 0:10:35.280 take away of an element of anxiety. 0:10:35.400 --> 0:10:37.839 It might do that, but it also would create Because 0:10:37.960 --> 0:10:39.839 the people that we are are based on the experiences 0:10:39.840 --> 0:10:42.040 we have, right, they're based on the decisions that we've 0:10:42.080 --> 0:10:44.320 made throughout our life that have gotten us to point 0:10:44.480 --> 0:10:46.320 X or point y or wherever you are in your life. 0:10:46.760 --> 0:10:50.480 If you could bypass that and you could treat people 0:10:50.520 --> 0:10:53.840 in a disposable way, knowing that something else was coming 0:10:53.880 --> 0:10:57.320 along in the future with absolute certainty and clarity, that 0:10:57.440 --> 0:11:00.360 would create a really fucking horrible person. I mean, that 0:11:00.400 --> 0:11:02.800 would create a person who hasn't had the responsibility of 0:11:02.840 --> 0:11:03.760 treating people kind. 0:11:04.080 --> 0:11:05.720 So I just think, as much as it's. 0:11:05.640 --> 0:11:08.520 Great hypothetical, I would say we would have a world 0:11:08.559 --> 0:11:11.920 of really, really horrible people who actually weren't very good 0:11:11.920 --> 0:11:14.840 in relationships because they had not had the practice. 0:11:15.000 --> 0:11:17.480 Okay, so the second part of that question, if you 0:11:17.520 --> 0:11:20.679 could find out now, you could go forward ten years 0:11:20.720 --> 0:11:22.320 and see if you're still with your partner. So if 0:11:22.320 --> 0:11:24.920 you're still with Matt, you're still with Toddloan, I'm still 0:11:24.920 --> 0:11:26.520 with ban Would you want to find out or not? 0:11:26.760 --> 0:11:28.760 You don't get to see why you're not or why 0:11:28.920 --> 0:11:30.400 you know if you're not, it just says you're not. 0:11:30.440 --> 0:11:31.720 You don't know what happens in the interim. 0:11:31.960 --> 0:11:34.760 I would, because I'm in reproductive years I would because 0:11:34.760 --> 0:11:37.600 I'm in a time of my life that if I 0:11:37.679 --> 0:11:39.560 was to look into a crystal ball and see ten 0:11:39.640 --> 0:11:42.600 years down the future, like my current understanding is that 0:11:42.640 --> 0:11:45.520 I do want children. If I could look ten years 0:11:45.520 --> 0:11:47.640 in the future and it not be with him, I'd 0:11:47.720 --> 0:11:50.280 rather know now because then I can make choices that 0:11:50.360 --> 0:11:53.160 are based off of you know, a very real biological clock. 0:11:53.160 --> 0:11:55.520 You could still have kids and then have a great 0:11:55.520 --> 0:11:56.880 life for a decade and then split up. 0:11:57.120 --> 0:12:00.440 True, I guess it doesn't tell you when that ten 0:12:00.559 --> 0:12:02.280 years you break up, which does make it a little 0:12:02.280 --> 0:12:02.920 bit more complex. 0:12:02.960 --> 0:12:04.360 But if I was to find out that it was, 0:12:04.520 --> 0:12:06.400 you know, not going to be with. 0:12:06.440 --> 0:12:09.960 Him, I would probably look for someone that I could 0:12:10.000 --> 0:12:11.360 create that family unit with. 0:12:12.000 --> 0:12:13.680 So it makes sense deep and you wouldn't want to know. 0:12:13.720 --> 0:12:15.880 Loran, No, I don't want to know, fuck me up, 0:12:15.880 --> 0:12:21.240 Scotty fucking up Manny, No, I don't want to know. 0:12:21.400 --> 0:12:24.440 I like the not knowing of what's happening in life. 0:12:24.480 --> 0:12:25.360 I think it's important. 0:12:25.440 --> 0:12:27.920 I think it's like what makes things exciting, It's what 0:12:27.960 --> 0:12:31.480 makes things exhilarating. And also the knowing that I guess 0:12:31.520 --> 0:12:33.400 it's truefold when you're in a bad place, in life 0:12:33.440 --> 0:12:36.240 that things can get instantly better then when things change, 0:12:36.440 --> 0:12:38.360 and I know that that also then has the flip. 0:12:38.400 --> 0:12:41.000 But I prefer not knowing about everything. You like the surprise. 0:12:41.160 --> 0:12:42.800 Yeah, Like I don't even know what my fiance looks 0:12:42.840 --> 0:12:45.320 like anymore or feels like, so that's always the fresh 0:12:45.440 --> 0:12:47.000 Every six months, I'm like, oh that's. 0:12:46.840 --> 0:12:49.320 What you look like. Oh you're tall, Brittany. 0:12:50.000 --> 0:12:52.160 The other day we were talking and Brittany said, I'm 0:12:52.200 --> 0:12:53.080 so desperate now. 0:12:53.160 --> 0:12:54.840 I just messaged Ben and told him to show me 0:12:54.880 --> 0:12:55.520 his penis. 0:12:55.640 --> 0:12:58.080 It's all I needed was just to see it on 0:12:58.160 --> 0:12:59.160 FaceTime flaccid. 0:12:59.200 --> 0:13:01.640 She's like, I didn't even and he was like, is 0:13:01.640 --> 0:13:03.360 this what you want? She was like, yeah, show me. 0:13:04.640 --> 0:13:07.280 Because the time. Okay, Ben just moved to Romania. We 0:13:07.320 --> 0:13:09.800 haven't spoken about it yet, and he's really upset. He goes, 0:13:09.960 --> 0:13:12.160 you haven't told everyone I've moved to Romania yet. So 0:13:12.200 --> 0:13:13.200 Ben's I'm. 0:13:13.080 --> 0:13:14.800 Really sorry, Ben, because I know that he listens to 0:13:14.800 --> 0:13:16.720 almost every episode. I'm really sorry that we've talked about 0:13:16.720 --> 0:13:21.040 your filacipenus before talking about Romania. You know, it's a 0:13:21.040 --> 0:13:24.120 massive transition, so people don't know obviously he's in Scotland 0:13:24.160 --> 0:13:24.680 for so long? 0:13:24.960 --> 0:13:27.719 What has happened? Why is he in Romania? Well, I'll just. 0:13:27.679 --> 0:13:30.000 Scoop past it. Not scoop past it, sorry, Ben. He 0:13:30.040 --> 0:13:32.800 moved to Romania, which is where Dracula is from. As 0:13:32.840 --> 0:13:36.680 a fun fact, dracular character not real, but the fiction 0:13:37.000 --> 0:13:40.160 where he's from is real, which is Transylvania in Romania. 0:13:40.240 --> 0:13:42.280 So he moved Romani. He's there for a couple of years, 0:13:42.320 --> 0:13:44.120 so he's been there one or two weeks. He played 0:13:44.120 --> 0:13:46.760 his first match last two nights ago, which I got 0:13:46.840 --> 0:13:48.720 up very early for. I'm very proud of him. It's 0:13:48.920 --> 0:13:51.400 a great move for him. So I'm going to Romania 0:13:51.440 --> 0:13:53.000 in a couple of weeks when we have our little break. 0:13:53.040 --> 0:13:55.640 We're having like a little one week break. But what 0:13:55.679 --> 0:13:57.760 I was saying is the time difference is different again, 0:13:58.000 --> 0:14:00.280 so we're trying to work out the time to princes 0:14:00.400 --> 0:14:03.120 now and we just haven't been able to match up. Ben. 0:14:03.160 --> 0:14:05.920 Moving countries has been wild, Like it's been such a 0:14:05.920 --> 0:14:08.000 big job because I only get three days notice to 0:14:08.000 --> 0:14:11.079 pack their entire life up, so we'd barely been speaking. 0:14:11.160 --> 0:14:13.200 So I'm prefacing that because I really want you to 0:14:13.240 --> 0:14:15.760 understand where I was in that moment and then we're 0:14:15.880 --> 0:14:19.000 in bed on FaceTime. He was laying down on the 0:14:19.040 --> 0:14:20.440 lounge like he just had a big day and I 0:14:20.480 --> 0:14:22.000 was like, babe, He's like, yeah, this is not a 0:14:22.000 --> 0:14:24.120 sexy chat. He was just watching TV. I was like, 0:14:25.120 --> 0:14:25.480 show me. 0:14:26.360 --> 0:14:26.760 He was like what. 0:14:26.880 --> 0:14:27.840 I was like, just show me, just give me a 0:14:27.840 --> 0:14:29.320 little look. He's like what. I was like, you need 0:14:29.360 --> 0:14:32.000 it here. I was like, he's like, babe, it's we're 0:14:32.000 --> 0:14:33.400 not It's not even like that. It's like and I 0:14:33.440 --> 0:14:34.640 was like, just show me. I was like, I just 0:14:34.640 --> 0:14:35.360 need a little it's. 0:14:35.320 --> 0:14:37.160 Kind of peel the sweaty thing off the fall sack 0:14:37.200 --> 0:14:38.080 and be like here it is. 0:14:38.800 --> 0:14:40.760 I was like, I said, I don't want to sexy. 0:14:40.800 --> 0:14:42.080 He's like, just need I just need to see something 0:14:42.240 --> 0:14:43.640 like what. We just like flapped it out for a 0:14:43.680 --> 0:14:44.880 second and I was like that was it. That's all 0:14:44.920 --> 0:14:48.080 I needed topped up And it was mean topped up. 0:14:48.080 --> 0:14:50.760 I feel like desperate times, cold, desperate measure. It's bad 0:14:50.840 --> 0:14:51.560 over here, babe. 0:14:51.600 --> 0:14:55.840 I'm at a real low point. Did you skip over 0:14:56.160 --> 0:14:58.200 Why Ben moved? Why did he move to? 0:14:58.280 --> 0:14:58.520 Sorry? 0:14:58.560 --> 0:15:01.760 Ben? So? I was going to the import point. Ben 0:15:01.800 --> 0:15:04.000 moved He was bought by a football team. So he 0:15:04.040 --> 0:15:06.920 plays for a football team there now, which is awesome. 0:15:06.960 --> 0:15:08.800 So he signed a contract for a couple of years. 0:15:08.840 --> 0:15:12.680 I didn't see Romania in my Bingo card, but but 0:15:12.800 --> 0:15:19.720 that's where we live now, so he wean. I am Dracula. 0:15:19.840 --> 0:15:21.680 I live in Romania. 0:15:21.760 --> 0:15:23.720 So Ben used to play for Celtics, for anyone who's 0:15:23.720 --> 0:15:26.520 not familiar, and he's been brought out of his Celtics contract. 0:15:26.680 --> 0:15:29.240 Yeah, with a Romanian football team. 0:15:29.080 --> 0:15:37.560 Yeah, called rap Niche rapid Fast. They're really fast. Yeah, 0:15:37.600 --> 0:15:40.520 so he plays for Rapid Romania, plays really fast team. 0:15:40.560 --> 0:15:43.400 Now they play at ten pm at night because it's 0:15:43.400 --> 0:15:45.800 forty degrees there. It's literally too hot for them to play. 0:15:46.600 --> 0:15:49.120 So he's gone through. He has spent fifteen years in 0:15:49.120 --> 0:15:52.040 the UK where it just rains and he's freezing and 0:15:52.080 --> 0:15:55.080 he's not coping. He's like melting. He's like, it's so odd. 0:15:55.160 --> 0:15:57.040 That's so interesting because I would have thought that Dracula 0:15:57.040 --> 0:15:58.600 lived in a cold place, not a hot place. 0:15:58.840 --> 0:15:59.440 Well, I was. 0:15:59.400 --> 0:16:01.520 Gonna you know, I know he's not real, but if 0:16:01.560 --> 0:16:05.280 I was going to unpack Dracula, the climate around him. 0:16:05.520 --> 0:16:08.680 Dracula, I think he drives in a colder environment, but 0:16:08.800 --> 0:16:11.000 it does get really cold in the winter there where 0:16:11.000 --> 0:16:12.880 he's what does he do in summer? I think he 0:16:12.920 --> 0:16:14.920 doesn't go out at night. Dracula is a night animal. 0:16:15.080 --> 0:16:16.600 Isn't that the whole point? I'm not. 0:16:17.040 --> 0:16:20.160 It's kind of like a mosquito, isn't he's mosquito. 0:16:20.160 --> 0:16:21.800 I don't know enough about Dracula. 0:16:21.960 --> 0:16:24.600 He's about my bat. I don't know how you guys 0:16:24.640 --> 0:16:27.840 don't know about Dracula. Where the fuck did you grow up? 0:16:28.520 --> 0:16:31.520 How many people Dragon have checked out so far? It's 0:16:31.560 --> 0:16:32.400 been unhinged. 0:16:33.480 --> 0:16:35.280 Are you excited to go to Romania? I first, like, 0:16:35.280 --> 0:16:36.760 have you ever been to Romania before? 0:16:37.000 --> 0:16:39.640 No? Are you excited to go? Correct? What are you 0:16:39.680 --> 0:16:41.400 gonna do when you get there? We're going to We've 0:16:41.400 --> 0:16:43.560 got a really short time, but he gets his days 0:16:43.600 --> 0:16:45.440 free because they play so late at night, Like they 0:16:45.440 --> 0:16:47.720 don't even train until they start their day at four 0:16:47.760 --> 0:16:50.840 pm because it is physically too hot. So we've only 0:16:50.880 --> 0:16:55.320 got maybe eight days. Romania is crazily beautiful from what 0:16:55.360 --> 0:16:57.240 I have seen, so I didn't know anything about it 0:16:57.280 --> 0:16:59.440 was never on the top of my tourist list, but 0:16:59.520 --> 0:17:01.120 I did some googling. When he's like, Hey, I think 0:17:01.120 --> 0:17:02.560 I'm going to move to Romania in two days. I 0:17:02.600 --> 0:17:06.119 was like, Google, Google, Google, it looks incredible. So I 0:17:06.119 --> 0:17:08.040 think I'm just going to be real tourists. Ben hasn't 0:17:08.080 --> 0:17:10.560 seen much since he's been there because it's too crazy, 0:17:10.680 --> 0:17:13.200 like he's just trying to focus on being a good footballer. 0:17:13.280 --> 0:17:14.800 When it's going to be the first time that you go, 0:17:15.119 --> 0:17:15.880 I think in a month. 0:17:17.119 --> 0:17:19.560 Yeah, yeah, in about four or five weeks. I think. 0:17:19.800 --> 0:17:21.600 Haven't booked flight jet. I'll book in a couple of days. 0:17:21.640 --> 0:17:24.080 But yeah, that's me, guys. 0:17:24.880 --> 0:17:26.800 Well, something I wanted to talk to you about that's 0:17:26.800 --> 0:17:29.720 happened recently in my life, you guys know. And the 0:17:29.720 --> 0:17:31.800 reason why I wanted to bring this up is because 0:17:31.800 --> 0:17:34.560 it came off the back of the recommendation that so 0:17:34.680 --> 0:17:37.320 many of you has sent us. So last week I 0:17:37.400 --> 0:17:40.520 was talking about Neil, about my stepdad who passed away. 0:17:40.680 --> 0:17:42.879 But one of the big, big parts of that, and 0:17:42.920 --> 0:17:43.560 something that. 0:17:43.440 --> 0:17:46.200 I had found really hard, was talking to the kids 0:17:46.240 --> 0:17:50.120 about death right because we've done it now a couple 0:17:50.160 --> 0:17:53.080 of times, but they haven't fully understood it. And then 0:17:53.440 --> 0:17:55.600 even though we have had to have that conversation, because 0:17:55.640 --> 0:17:58.040 you know, I've lost my grandfather and my nana, having 0:17:58.040 --> 0:18:03.040 it around Neil, which is their grandfather, felt way more serious, 0:18:03.080 --> 0:18:04.520 like it felt like something that was going to be 0:18:04.600 --> 0:18:06.560 like a It was a big conversation for me to 0:18:06.600 --> 0:18:08.840 work myself up to, so I was talking about it 0:18:08.840 --> 0:18:12.240 on last Tuesday's episode. So many people recommended this book 0:18:12.320 --> 0:18:15.080 called The Invisible String, produced Akisha went and bought the 0:18:15.080 --> 0:18:18.520 book and I read it and I actually prepped myself 0:18:18.600 --> 0:18:19.880 up for reading it to the girls. 0:18:20.240 --> 0:18:22.439 Is it so beautiful? 0:18:22.480 --> 0:18:25.400 So? Is it a book on guidance for like an 0:18:25.400 --> 0:18:27.440 adult to tell a child or something that a child 0:18:27.480 --> 0:18:28.600 reads to help them understand. 0:18:28.760 --> 0:18:31.000 No, And I wasn't sure what to expect either, because 0:18:31.000 --> 0:18:33.720 it came to I'm talking like hundreds of people recommended 0:18:33.760 --> 0:18:36.480 this book The Invisible String, and I thought it must 0:18:36.520 --> 0:18:39.280 have just been about death, right, That's what I thought 0:18:39.440 --> 0:18:41.879 it would have been, if that's where the recommendation was 0:18:41.880 --> 0:18:45.879 coming from. But basically, what it describes is that we're 0:18:45.920 --> 0:18:48.640 all connected. The people that you love are always connected 0:18:48.640 --> 0:18:50.680 by an invisible string of love. So when Mum goes 0:18:50.680 --> 0:18:53.200 to work, even though you can't see me, we're still 0:18:53.240 --> 0:18:56.080 connected by the invisible string. So it's actually not about 0:18:56.240 --> 0:18:59.840 death at all. It's only one page that even mentions death, 0:19:00.080 --> 0:19:01.959 but it says, you know, oh, and so you know 0:19:01.960 --> 0:19:04.080 what about Uncle Harry or whoever the uncle is in 0:19:04.119 --> 0:19:05.960 the book and he talks about him being in heaven 0:19:06.000 --> 0:19:08.119 and how we're still connected by the invisible string of 0:19:08.160 --> 0:19:10.679 love even though you can't see them anymore. It was 0:19:10.800 --> 0:19:13.360 really beautiful. So you read it to them, You read 0:19:13.359 --> 0:19:15.200 it to them. It's a story book, it's kid's book. 0:19:15.000 --> 0:19:17.320 And so do you read it to them and then, sorry, 0:19:17.359 --> 0:19:18.720 I'm so curious. Do you read it to them for 0:19:18.840 --> 0:19:21.119 like a little while so it becomes a book, and 0:19:21.160 --> 0:19:23.119 then you tell them about someone that's passed so that 0:19:23.160 --> 0:19:24.200 they can make the connection. 0:19:24.480 --> 0:19:27.480 So I picked the girls up from school that afternoon 0:19:27.720 --> 0:19:29.720 after we'd finished the podcast, and that was the day 0:19:29.720 --> 0:19:30.560 that I was going to talk to them. 0:19:30.600 --> 0:19:32.760 So it was last Monday. I picked the girls up. 0:19:32.960 --> 0:19:35.760 And I sometimes find that, like having serious conversations with 0:19:35.800 --> 0:19:38.280 them in the car works really well, because they're a 0:19:38.359 --> 0:19:42.200 captured audience. They're in their seats, well, audience, you can. 0:19:42.040 --> 0:19:44.640 Tell you're a performer. No, they can't leave. 0:19:45.960 --> 0:19:47.280 I walk the audience in there. 0:19:47.880 --> 0:19:50.359 No, because little kids are so easily distracted. And like 0:19:50.400 --> 0:19:52.800 sometimes when I try and have serious conversations with them. 0:19:53.280 --> 0:19:55.320 Lola will just walk away go pick up a block, 0:19:55.359 --> 0:19:57.600 and I'm like, this is not going well. So she's 0:19:57.600 --> 0:19:59.320 in her seat. Molly was in her seat, but I 0:19:59.400 --> 0:20:01.680 wasn't driving. I was just like in the car and 0:20:01.720 --> 0:20:03.040 that way. I could you give them a hug if 0:20:03.080 --> 0:20:05.480 they needed it? And I told them. I was like, guys, 0:20:05.480 --> 0:20:07.280 you know how we've been talking a lot about Far 0:20:07.400 --> 0:20:12.160 and how Far is really sick. And Marley said, dif 0:20:12.200 --> 0:20:12.480 I die. 0:20:12.880 --> 0:20:13.520 So she got it. 0:20:13.640 --> 0:20:16.199 She got upset straight away, and then we had a 0:20:16.200 --> 0:20:18.520 cuddle and we talked about it a little bit more 0:20:18.520 --> 0:20:19.960 and then she kind of was like, that's very sad, 0:20:20.000 --> 0:20:21.600 and then she just moved on to the next thing. 0:20:21.720 --> 0:20:24.520 So for her, it's been like lots of little conversations. 0:20:24.800 --> 0:20:28.800 But Lola, who's three, doesn't quite understand. So we had 0:20:28.800 --> 0:20:33.200 the conversation and she goes, yeah, Far's in the hospital 0:20:33.480 --> 0:20:35.600 and I was like, no, he's not in the hospital anymore. 0:20:35.640 --> 0:20:40.639 And she goes, oh, is he in India? And I 0:20:40.680 --> 0:20:40.960 was like. 0:20:42.520 --> 0:20:45.040 What, maybe you just went because I just went to 0:20:45.040 --> 0:20:47.680 India and I was like, no, sweet, it could be though, Laura. 0:20:47.920 --> 0:20:51.359 I was like, he's not in India. And then she goes, right, 0:20:52.000 --> 0:20:53.560 so he's in Melbourne. 0:20:53.400 --> 0:20:56.520 And I was like, no, off every city that she knows. 0:20:56.600 --> 0:20:58.800 She's rattled off everywhere that I've been to for a 0:20:58.840 --> 0:21:02.480 work trip and I was like no, and she goes, gotcha, 0:21:02.760 --> 0:21:03.719 So he's in Heaven. 0:21:03.840 --> 0:21:05.000 Then that's in Melbourne. 0:21:05.160 --> 0:21:08.000 And I was like, sweetheart, So right now, far is 0:21:08.000 --> 0:21:10.280 in Melbourne according to Lola, and according to Marla, he's 0:21:10.280 --> 0:21:13.080 in Heaven. So she's the process thinks in their own 0:21:13.400 --> 0:21:14.640 unique little ways. 0:21:14.400 --> 0:21:17.760 But it sounds like Lola almost has it right, like 0:21:17.840 --> 0:21:19.280 Heaven but over Melbourne. 0:21:19.400 --> 0:21:21.000 I think the problem is is that Lola thinks that 0:21:21.040 --> 0:21:23.760 people come back from it, because like I came back 0:21:23.800 --> 0:21:27.119 from Melbourne. I came back from India, Whereas like she 0:21:27.320 --> 0:21:29.280 just thinks that he's just gone somewhere and he'll come 0:21:29.280 --> 0:21:31.360 back and then and she'll see him again. 0:21:31.080 --> 0:21:33.080 Like heaven's a place like Melbourne. Yeah, like him. 0:21:33.200 --> 0:21:36.680 She can't comprehend the fact that it's like something that's intangible, 0:21:37.080 --> 0:21:38.000 Like what do you do because. 0:21:37.800 --> 0:21:40.560 She's only three, it's so young, But do you explain 0:21:40.840 --> 0:21:42.680 he's not coming back from Melbourne. 0:21:43.880 --> 0:21:47.800 I haven't gone to that extent. I think she'll start 0:21:47.800 --> 0:21:49.880 to figure it out and then she'll ask more questions. 0:21:49.920 --> 0:21:53.160 I think, I don't think. And this is from my experience. Now, 0:21:53.520 --> 0:21:56.320 it's not a one off conversation. It's a conversation that's 0:21:56.359 --> 0:21:58.600 made up of many small conversations to kind of get 0:21:58.640 --> 0:22:01.320 them to a place of understanding. So we've now talked 0:22:01.320 --> 0:22:05.280 about it lots. Lauras still doesn't understand, but Marley absolutely does. 0:22:05.480 --> 0:22:08.920 You'll probably find that out of nowhere in a couple 0:22:08.960 --> 0:22:11.119 of months or something. She'll pop up with something, you know, 0:22:11.200 --> 0:22:13.000 like something will come to her mind, and it's. 0:22:12.880 --> 0:22:14.639 Like these micro conversations that you have. 0:22:14.800 --> 0:22:18.760 But it's so hard to have it because I didn't 0:22:18.800 --> 0:22:20.680 want to and I did, of course I got upset, 0:22:20.720 --> 0:22:22.960 but I didn't want to get super upset, because then 0:22:23.000 --> 0:22:24.280 I was like, well, are they going to be more 0:22:24.320 --> 0:22:28.399 traumatized by me crying rather than their lack of comprehension 0:22:28.400 --> 0:22:30.800 around something that's quite a big thing to grass. But 0:22:30.920 --> 0:22:34.640 we had the funeral on Friday this week, and we're 0:22:34.680 --> 0:22:36.760 going to bring them to the funeral with us, which 0:22:36.840 --> 0:22:39.320 I am still unsure whether that's the right decision or not, 0:22:39.520 --> 0:22:41.800 being that they're so little. But I just remember when 0:22:41.800 --> 0:22:43.880 my great grandma passed away when I was young and 0:22:43.960 --> 0:22:46.320 being told I couldn't come, and how that I felt 0:22:46.359 --> 0:22:48.919 really like, I like I wanted to be there, If 0:22:49.000 --> 0:22:49.600 that makes sense. 0:22:50.040 --> 0:22:51.200 I don't know. I don't know. 0:22:51.600 --> 0:22:54.800 I'm trying to think right now. Where I heard this. 0:22:55.000 --> 0:22:57.240 I heard this exact thing on the weekend. Actually, I 0:22:57.240 --> 0:22:59.399 think it was a It was a podcast. It was 0:22:59.400 --> 0:23:03.080 a true crime podcast. The man in it said, when 0:23:03.520 --> 0:23:05.919 he was a child, one of his school friends unfortunately 0:23:05.920 --> 0:23:08.280 passed away, and his parents didn't let him go to 0:23:08.280 --> 0:23:10.679 the funeral because they thought it will traumatize you. And 0:23:10.720 --> 0:23:13.199 he is said as an adult, he remembers being not 0:23:13.240 --> 0:23:15.480 allowed to go allowed to go, and that that was 0:23:15.480 --> 0:23:17.560 more traumatizing. I thought that that's a weird thing that 0:23:17.600 --> 0:23:18.719 I've just heard that on the weekend. 0:23:18.720 --> 0:23:20.960 Well, that's how I felt about my great grandmother's funeral. 0:23:21.000 --> 0:23:22.639 And we were very very close, and I must have 0:23:22.720 --> 0:23:25.000 only been the same age as Maley. But I still 0:23:25.040 --> 0:23:27.800 remember not being allowed to go because collectively I remember 0:23:27.840 --> 0:23:30.080 all the adults being sad and mourning, and I remember 0:23:30.119 --> 0:23:32.760 this big thing happened, and I knew that I wasn't 0:23:32.760 --> 0:23:34.479 going to see her again, But then I felt like 0:23:34.560 --> 0:23:37.160 I was excluded from. 0:23:36.440 --> 0:23:38.000 Their feelings about it. I don't know. 0:23:38.080 --> 0:23:40.440 I just remember that and I was like, Okay, that 0:23:40.640 --> 0:23:43.000 had an impact on me, So I'll bring the kids 0:23:43.000 --> 0:23:44.760 and then maybe that will fuck them up in another way. 0:23:44.800 --> 0:23:46.640 I don't know, Like we're all doing our best here 0:23:46.680 --> 0:23:47.920 as parents, so we'll see. 0:23:48.320 --> 0:23:50.600 Also, what you just said about how you weren't sure 0:23:50.640 --> 0:23:54.200 how you wanted them to see you grieving, maybe that's 0:23:54.240 --> 0:23:56.840 a factor that your mum she expected that she wasn't 0:23:56.880 --> 0:23:58.800 going to be able to control her emotions in that time, 0:23:58.880 --> 0:24:00.200 and so that maybe that's why. 0:24:00.160 --> 0:24:01.879 She didn't bring you along to the funeral. 0:24:02.000 --> 0:24:02.560 Yeah, totally. 0:24:02.600 --> 0:24:04.399 But I don't know, And maybe it's because we are 0:24:04.440 --> 0:24:07.120 this self help generation. I don't know if it's a 0:24:07.160 --> 0:24:09.800 bad thing that kids see their parents get upset, like 0:24:10.119 --> 0:24:11.800 so long as it's not that you're going to your 0:24:11.840 --> 0:24:14.280 children for comfort to make you feel better. But I 0:24:14.320 --> 0:24:18.560 think it's okay that kids understand that parents have complex 0:24:18.600 --> 0:24:19.359 feelings as well. 0:24:19.440 --> 0:24:21.359 I think it depends on the reason. I think it 0:24:21.400 --> 0:24:24.360 depends on why you're upset, because I yeah, I think 0:24:24.359 --> 0:24:26.359 that makes a big difference. But in terms of the 0:24:26.440 --> 0:24:28.399 funeral and if you should take them or not, I 0:24:28.400 --> 0:24:30.480 think that also depends on what kind of a funeral, 0:24:31.160 --> 0:24:33.320 like is it an open casket, is it just more 0:24:33.320 --> 0:24:36.640 of a goodbye? I think the open casket, it's yeah. 0:24:36.640 --> 0:24:38.560 But for example, I think that's where you'd be like, 0:24:38.880 --> 0:24:41.119 that is not a memory they should probably have or 0:24:41.119 --> 0:24:43.399 something they should see. But I think the idea of 0:24:43.760 --> 0:24:46.040 everyone that you know, like as a five year old, 0:24:46.240 --> 0:24:49.480 like all these important people to you, saying goodbye to 0:24:49.520 --> 0:24:52.520 someone that was important to them, and it's a ceremony 0:24:52.520 --> 0:24:55.000 of love and you know, in a way happiness celebrating 0:24:55.040 --> 0:24:58.840 someone's life. Maybe that isn't the worst thing. And I'm 0:24:58.880 --> 0:25:00.680 not a child psychologist, I don't know, but maybe it's 0:25:00.680 --> 0:25:03.560 not a bad thing for them to have some closure 0:25:03.560 --> 0:25:05.879 and understand that this is us saying goodbye. You know, 0:25:05.960 --> 0:25:08.399 he's not coming back. And I don't know. 0:25:08.920 --> 0:25:11.000 Yeah, I mean, once again, I know, I've got five 0:25:11.080 --> 0:25:11.719 days to find out. 0:25:11.720 --> 0:25:13.560 The last time I was like child psychologists, there were 0:25:13.600 --> 0:25:15.200 so many of them that slimed to the DMS around 0:25:15.320 --> 0:25:17.919 how to speak to kids. And I'm so appreciated, like 0:25:18.240 --> 0:25:21.080 genuinely everyone who recommended the book or recommended how they've 0:25:21.080 --> 0:25:25.160 had these conversations with their kids. I'm so grateful, but yeah, 0:25:25.400 --> 0:25:27.280 I don't know if there is a perfect way to 0:25:27.280 --> 0:25:29.440 do this stuff. It's been a big parental learning curve 0:25:29.480 --> 0:25:33.240 this last week. We are talking about the thing that 0:25:33.320 --> 0:25:35.359 everybody is talking about at the moment, the thing that 0:25:35.440 --> 0:25:38.680 if you open Instagram and you go to explore page, 0:25:38.720 --> 0:25:41.040 you open a real you cannot escape it. 0:25:41.320 --> 0:25:43.040 Because she's gone from. 0:25:42.880 --> 0:25:46.280 Being an Olympic failure to being a social media phenomenon, 0:25:46.560 --> 0:25:50.520 and that is Rachel Gun Raygun ray Gun. She's a breaker, 0:25:50.720 --> 0:25:55.720 doctor Reagan, and not only Raygun, doctor Reygun. Okay, even 0:25:56.480 --> 0:26:02.160 even she is such a phenomenon that Adele just stopped 0:26:02.160 --> 0:26:04.840 her concert in the middle, in the middle to talk 0:26:04.880 --> 0:26:07.320 about it, to mention her by name. I'm sorry, I 0:26:07.440 --> 0:26:09.720 would do anything to have Adele's stop a concert and 0:26:09.760 --> 0:26:10.439 say my name. 0:26:10.480 --> 0:26:12.880 Even if it was kind of to the kangaroo, I'd 0:26:12.920 --> 0:26:13.320 do it. 0:26:13.320 --> 0:26:15.359 It was like, so Adele stopped her concert to like 0:26:15.480 --> 0:26:18.040 one on one hand, be like, hey, this happened. This 0:26:18.080 --> 0:26:20.359 poor woman's getting so much trolling, but also go and 0:26:20.400 --> 0:26:21.440 watch it and laugh, so. 0:26:21.880 --> 0:26:22.560 She really haven't. 0:26:22.640 --> 0:26:24.720 Yeah, she's like the best thing that's ever been at 0:26:24.760 --> 0:26:26.800 the Olympics. Like, I love it. I'm so obsessed with 0:26:26.880 --> 0:26:29.640 it's amazing. And then the backhand of that was like, also, 0:26:29.680 --> 0:26:31.280 if you haven't seen it, go google it long. 0:26:31.359 --> 0:26:33.159 So to set this up in case you are the 0:26:33.200 --> 0:26:35.720 one person in Australia who hasn't seen this yet, don't worry. 0:26:35.760 --> 0:26:37.960 We're not going to victimize you. It's okay, you can 0:26:38.040 --> 0:26:40.600 join the group. We can all giggle about this together. 0:26:41.080 --> 0:26:41.560 Raygun. 0:26:41.680 --> 0:26:45.320 She's an Australian woman. She's a PhD, a graduate, so 0:26:45.520 --> 0:26:49.320 doctor Raygun. But she also recently went to the Olympics. 0:26:49.480 --> 0:26:51.520 She competed in the breaking, which is the very first 0:26:51.520 --> 0:26:54.240 time the Olympics has ever had breaking as an Olympic 0:26:54.280 --> 0:26:55.879 sport this year in Paris. 0:26:55.520 --> 0:26:57.679 And the next Olympics have already canceled it. 0:26:58.160 --> 0:26:59.560 Yeah, it's unfortunately. 0:26:59.560 --> 0:27:02.280 It was one wonder but the thing is, and I mean, 0:27:02.560 --> 0:27:05.760 there's been so much debate as to whether it was satirical, 0:27:06.119 --> 0:27:08.800 whether she intended to perform like this, whether it was 0:27:09.000 --> 0:27:13.800 a statement around the culture of breaking. But ultimately the 0:27:13.920 --> 0:27:18.320 dance that she performed scored her zero. She came absolutely 0:27:18.600 --> 0:27:21.919 dead last. And the media sort of frenzy around this 0:27:22.040 --> 0:27:24.400 now has been because some people are saying that it's 0:27:24.400 --> 0:27:26.600 an embarrassment that she even made it to the Olympics. 0:27:26.840 --> 0:27:28.840 But at the same time there's been almost this tide 0:27:28.840 --> 0:27:30.800 shift where now people are calling her the Queen of 0:27:30.840 --> 0:27:33.240 Australia for just getting out there and giving it a 0:27:33.280 --> 0:27:36.120 red hot crack. The three of us have all very 0:27:36.119 --> 0:27:38.359 different views on this because I think it begs to 0:27:38.440 --> 0:27:41.439 question now whether she is at the bottom of a pylon, 0:27:41.440 --> 0:27:44.240 whether this is bullying, whether this is trolling, or whether 0:27:44.280 --> 0:27:47.640 this is the response one should expect for doing such 0:27:47.680 --> 0:27:51.800 a terrible performance at the absolute elite, the top of 0:27:51.840 --> 0:27:53.480 the food chain when it comes to sport, and that 0:27:53.560 --> 0:27:54.160 is the Olympics. 0:27:54.240 --> 0:27:55.880 Add a little bit of like context as to who 0:27:55.880 --> 0:27:57.880 she is and what she thought of her own performance. 0:27:57.920 --> 0:28:00.399 Earlier in the day, she was interview and she was 0:28:00.480 --> 0:28:02.640 quoted saying, don't be afraid to be different, go out 0:28:02.640 --> 0:28:03.840 there and represent yourself. 0:28:03.840 --> 0:28:06.199 You never know what's going to take you. All of 0:28:06.200 --> 0:28:07.440 my moves are original. 0:28:07.560 --> 0:28:09.680 I was never going to beat these girls on what 0:28:09.720 --> 0:28:12.000 they do best, the dynamic and the power moves. So 0:28:12.040 --> 0:28:15.280 I wanted to move differently, be artistic and creative, because 0:28:15.320 --> 0:28:18.560 how many chances do you get in a lifetime to 0:28:18.680 --> 0:28:20.760 do that on an international stage. 0:28:20.920 --> 0:28:23.639 See, she went through three rounds and she got zero points. 0:28:23.640 --> 0:28:25.240 Like so she didn't even get one point in the 0:28:25.240 --> 0:28:28.959 three rounds from like five judges EVO. So overall in 0:28:29.000 --> 0:28:31.920 the breaking community, they have said that the performance wasn't 0:28:31.960 --> 0:28:34.600 enough to scratch, which is what matters. They're at the Olympics, 0:28:34.640 --> 0:28:36.919 in your chosen sport. You have the judges that are 0:28:36.920 --> 0:28:39.280 supposed to be experts in their chosen sport. They've decided 0:28:39.280 --> 0:28:42.600 to give you zero. That's not disputable for me. Like, 0:28:42.720 --> 0:28:45.680 I don't know breaking, and I watched it, and I 0:28:45.760 --> 0:28:48.239 was like, that is not a great performance. It is 0:28:48.320 --> 0:28:49.840 not a great performance for breaking. 0:28:49.920 --> 0:28:51.880 The thing is, though, is like you don't have to 0:28:51.920 --> 0:28:53.960 be an expert on breaking to watch it and think 0:28:53.960 --> 0:28:56.760 that it was an objectively bad performance, which is a 0:28:56.800 --> 0:28:58.560 horrible thing to say. I know, and I know that 0:28:58.560 --> 0:29:00.680 that's really mean, and we will get in the conversation 0:29:00.760 --> 0:29:03.320 around the pylon and the trolling and everything else. But 0:29:03.360 --> 0:29:05.400 I think the reason why this has happened is because 0:29:05.400 --> 0:29:09.400 people who have no literacy in breaking whatsoever all watched 0:29:09.440 --> 0:29:12.240 that and everyone kind of chuckled because I were like, well, 0:29:12.480 --> 0:29:14.720 I don't think that this was meant to be entertaining 0:29:14.760 --> 0:29:16.480 for the reasons that it was entertaining. 0:29:16.520 --> 0:29:18.760 Well, the end of my statement was I love her. 0:29:18.920 --> 0:29:21.960 I love her for that. The performance I can recognize 0:29:22.000 --> 0:29:25.080 was not up to Olympic quality, but I think she 0:29:25.240 --> 0:29:27.960 was fucking awesome And I take my hat off to 0:29:28.040 --> 0:29:31.440 her as a thirty six year old woman that is 0:29:31.440 --> 0:29:35.080 in a breaking community that isn't probably a huge community anyway, 0:29:35.120 --> 0:29:37.200 and doesn't have a lot of women that went out 0:29:37.240 --> 0:29:40.760 there and owned her own creativity. For whatever reason, she 0:29:40.840 --> 0:29:42.760 knew she wasn't going to compare to the others. She 0:29:42.880 --> 0:29:45.800 said that she was like, I'm thirty six. I don't 0:29:45.840 --> 0:29:47.920 have the strength and the agility and the stamina or 0:29:47.960 --> 0:29:49.560 whatever it was. She's like, I don't have the power 0:29:49.640 --> 0:29:51.880 moves that the younger people have. So she's like, I 0:29:52.000 --> 0:29:54.200 know that, so what can I do? That is a 0:29:54.240 --> 0:29:56.880 point of difference. So she said there were all original 0:29:56.920 --> 0:30:01.640 moves which I think were evident poofs that were creative, 0:30:01.640 --> 0:30:03.920 and she called it her art, and I think I 0:30:03.960 --> 0:30:05.520 take my hat off to her. I was like, you 0:30:06.800 --> 0:30:10.160 took an opportunity and you absolutely ran with it. But 0:30:10.240 --> 0:30:16.080 I don't like personally how many people are trolling her 0:30:16.200 --> 0:30:19.080 and that's because this isn't just This isn't just like 0:30:19.120 --> 0:30:22.479 an Australian thing the entire world, and that is not 0:30:22.520 --> 0:30:25.920 an exaggeration. She is currently the most talked about person 0:30:26.000 --> 0:30:27.800 or thing in the world, and some of it's good 0:30:27.800 --> 0:30:30.960 and supportive, but most of it is really shitty. And 0:30:31.000 --> 0:30:32.920 I always just try and think, put yourself in that 0:30:32.960 --> 0:30:33.760 person's position. 0:30:34.320 --> 0:30:37.920 I have flipped around on my perspective on this performance and. 0:30:37.960 --> 0:30:40.400 Slipped around on your back. That's what we saw. I 0:30:40.440 --> 0:30:41.840 did do the v shits. 0:30:42.160 --> 0:30:45.600 I initially thought over archingly, and I am someone who. 0:30:45.440 --> 0:30:48.080 Deeply loves sport. I love going and watching it. 0:30:48.120 --> 0:30:50.680 I love the kind of the determination that it takes 0:30:50.680 --> 0:30:53.760 for athletes to become what they are. I initially thought 0:30:53.880 --> 0:30:58.320 sport is designed to be entertainment, and this is one 0:30:58.360 --> 0:31:00.720 of the most entertaining things I have and I don't 0:31:00.720 --> 0:31:02.960 think that there's anyone who could say any different. You know, 0:31:03.000 --> 0:31:05.960 the virility of this performance is there for a reason. 0:31:06.040 --> 0:31:10.160 It was very entertaining for whatever emotion that invoked in you. 0:31:10.720 --> 0:31:13.400 But the counter argument to I mean, I guess the 0:31:13.440 --> 0:31:18.120 criticism of her and her performance, and maybe criticism rather 0:31:18.200 --> 0:31:20.800 than trolling. Here are a couple of things. She was 0:31:20.840 --> 0:31:24.560 selected to represent our country. She used taxpayer money to 0:31:24.640 --> 0:31:27.440 fund the trip, and that includes her partner as well, 0:31:27.520 --> 0:31:29.720 so like all of that is paid for by the taxpayer. 0:31:29.800 --> 0:31:32.520 So that sounds but that sounds the way that you 0:31:32.560 --> 0:31:35.960 would That sounds super negative. Every athlete went is taxpayer like. 0:31:36.000 --> 0:31:37.840 You can't just say that she went and used it 0:31:37.920 --> 0:31:40.800 like she was trying to scam the citizens of the 0:31:40.840 --> 0:31:41.760 good citizenship. 0:31:41.800 --> 0:31:44.160 Yah, it is like the real scare mongering of people 0:31:44.200 --> 0:31:46.400 who are like the purity of the Olympics. 0:31:46.720 --> 0:31:49.320 She used taxpayer money to go and do the sprinkler. 0:31:49.560 --> 0:31:51.280 If she won gold, we would have been like, yeah, 0:31:51.400 --> 0:31:54.160 we got her there, we paid yeah, one hundred percent. 0:31:54.240 --> 0:31:55.840 And also they would get a payment if they want 0:31:55.840 --> 0:31:59.240 a medal. But there aren't participation awards when you go 0:31:59.280 --> 0:32:02.480 to the Olympics, Like this isn't your year five Athletics 0:32:02.520 --> 0:32:05.680 carnival where you get a participation clap and the rhetoric 0:32:05.760 --> 0:32:08.920 of well, she did our best. I personally don't think 0:32:09.080 --> 0:32:12.360 she did her best is suited to a competition of 0:32:12.400 --> 0:32:13.600 this particular level. 0:32:14.120 --> 0:32:15.360 I disagree. 0:32:16.800 --> 0:32:18.880 I mean, she did get up there and choose to 0:32:18.920 --> 0:32:23.440 do moves like the kangaroo and the Sprinkler iconic and 0:32:23.800 --> 0:32:26.920 she contributed to I mean, we may get into this. 0:32:27.360 --> 0:32:30.000 There is a lot of criticism about whether breaking should 0:32:30.000 --> 0:32:31.920 be included as an Olympic sport. 0:32:31.680 --> 0:32:35.400 To begin with, and in my opinion, you can't say 0:32:35.440 --> 0:32:38.000 that you're going to push back on that criticism of 0:32:38.040 --> 0:32:40.240 the legitimacy of a particular. 0:32:39.720 --> 0:32:42.040 Sport and then get up and do a sprinkler. Hear 0:32:42.080 --> 0:32:45.880 me out. Every single person that goes to the Olympics 0:32:46.000 --> 0:32:48.560 cannot win, they cannot place, they cannot all make it. 0:32:48.600 --> 0:32:51.600 Someone won't get through the qualifying rounds. What you have 0:32:51.680 --> 0:32:53.720 to do is be the best in your country to go. 0:32:54.200 --> 0:32:56.280 Whether you want to argue the point truth and nail 0:32:56.280 --> 0:32:58.440 and say she wasn't good enough to go, she was 0:32:58.800 --> 0:33:00.000 for us and our country. 0:33:00.120 --> 0:33:02.480 We could just say a lot about the female breaking 0:33:02.480 --> 0:33:04.920 community in Australia if she was the number one, which 0:33:05.080 --> 0:33:07.480 fine iconic. As much as I am having a dig 0:33:07.560 --> 0:33:11.080 I'm also saying like, if that is the competition, if 0:33:11.080 --> 0:33:14.680 she is number one in our country, she has every 0:33:14.760 --> 0:33:17.840 right to be there and to compete. It just means 0:33:17.880 --> 0:33:20.240 that it is a sport that we are not good 0:33:20.320 --> 0:33:22.320 enough in in comparison to the rest of the world. 0:33:22.320 --> 0:33:23.840 We are not where we need to be to be 0:33:23.880 --> 0:33:25.160 able to be at an Olympic level. 0:33:25.280 --> 0:33:27.520 Yes, now listen to this. This is my counter argument 0:33:27.600 --> 0:33:29.520 to what Keisha descerned, where she's like, should you be 0:33:29.520 --> 0:33:31.920 getting a participation award when you go there? I did 0:33:31.960 --> 0:33:34.959 some googling. What is the spirit of the Olympics? 0:33:35.160 --> 0:33:35.600 Quote? 0:33:35.680 --> 0:33:38.680 The Olympic spirit is best expressed in the Olympic creed. 0:33:39.240 --> 0:33:41.480 The most important thing in the Olympic Games is not 0:33:41.520 --> 0:33:43.800 to win, but to take part, just as the most 0:33:43.800 --> 0:33:46.800 important thing in life is not to triumph, but the struggle. 0:33:47.120 --> 0:33:49.480 The essential thing is not to have conquered, but to 0:33:49.520 --> 0:33:53.600 have fought. Well, I'm sorry, Raygun fought till the end. Yes, 0:33:53.680 --> 0:33:58.280 I okay, she fought and she tried her best, and 0:33:58.440 --> 0:34:00.560 I take my hat off to I think if she 0:34:00.640 --> 0:34:02.239 got the chance to go to the Olympics, if she 0:34:02.360 --> 0:34:04.280 was the best, she knew she wasn't gonna win. She 0:34:04.360 --> 0:34:06.320 was like, yeah, I want, I'm patriotic, I want to 0:34:06.320 --> 0:34:07.200 put the green and gold on. 0:34:07.360 --> 0:34:10.359 I want to represent I. Look, I don't disagree with you. 0:34:10.480 --> 0:34:13.200 I think that maybe that's an oversimplification of what the 0:34:13.239 --> 0:34:14.319 Olympics stands for. 0:34:14.320 --> 0:34:15.759 For the athletes themselves. 0:34:16.080 --> 0:34:18.080 I would say that the people who have gone there, 0:34:18.360 --> 0:34:21.720 this is like their lives, like this is their absolute passion, 0:34:21.760 --> 0:34:23.680 this is what has and you. 0:34:23.719 --> 0:34:25.040 Know again regn's life. 0:34:25.080 --> 0:34:26.040 This can be said for Reagun. 0:34:26.080 --> 0:34:28.480 I mean, her PhD is in breaking, like she has 0:34:28.560 --> 0:34:32.120 obviously dedicated a very big part of her life to breaking. 0:34:32.480 --> 0:34:34.920 But I think the reason why some people are getting 0:34:34.920 --> 0:34:39.200 so angry not even angry, it's so stupid. Why are 0:34:39.200 --> 0:34:41.279 we all having so angry about break dancing when like 0:34:41.320 --> 0:34:43.200 three weeks ago, no one gave a fuck about breaking, 0:34:43.239 --> 0:34:45.160 you know what I mean, majority of Australians didn't. The 0:34:45.160 --> 0:34:49.160 people who did obviously cared. But the outraged community isn't 0:34:49.200 --> 0:34:52.239 the breaking community. It's everyone else who thinks it's such 0:34:52.239 --> 0:34:54.919 an injustice that we were embarrassed. 0:34:54.320 --> 0:34:55.120 At the Olympics. 0:34:55.400 --> 0:34:57.520 And that to me is funny, Like I think, if 0:34:57.520 --> 0:35:00.319 you're that mad about it, but you didn't care about 0:35:00.320 --> 0:35:02.760 breaking three weeks ago, you need to go and touch grass. 0:35:03.000 --> 0:35:05.160 The thing that I find the funniest about this is 0:35:05.160 --> 0:35:09.360 that there were amazing breakers in this competition. So Amy Yuasa, 0:35:09.520 --> 0:35:11.959 she's from Japan, she won. The woman who came second 0:35:12.080 --> 0:35:16.440 was from Lithuania. They were incredible, but their performances have 0:35:16.520 --> 0:35:19.360 been completely outshone by the person who came last. 0:35:19.560 --> 0:35:21.439 Well, this is so disappointing for them. 0:35:21.680 --> 0:35:24.520 But this is where it gets interesting and the conversation 0:35:24.600 --> 0:35:26.720 gets a little bit deeper and a little bit more serious. 0:35:27.080 --> 0:35:29.920 It's not that if the Australian breaking community isn't a 0:35:30.040 --> 0:35:32.920 leite or isn't big. There are plenty of people that 0:35:33.040 --> 0:35:36.400 are wonderful and incredibly talented breakers in Australia. But it 0:35:36.440 --> 0:35:39.200 goes into a deeper cultural level. A lot of the 0:35:39.200 --> 0:35:43.920 breaking community didn't want breaking to be an Olympic sport. 0:35:44.120 --> 0:35:47.120 Like, yeah, interesting you say that, because last night I 0:35:47.160 --> 0:35:49.800 did a very big deep dive as you mentioned. Laura 0:35:50.080 --> 0:35:53.120 rachel Gunn Raygun is an academic. She teaches at the 0:35:53.160 --> 0:35:57.520 Maccuora University and she has published articles on this And 0:35:58.040 --> 0:35:59.919 I just want to try and make this distinction clear. 0:36:00.280 --> 0:36:02.960 When you publish a scientific article, like a peer reviewed 0:36:03.040 --> 0:36:05.920 article or a paper, those terms are kind of using interchangeably. 0:36:06.400 --> 0:36:09.279 That doesn't just mean that you write something and that 0:36:09.400 --> 0:36:11.320 you send it to an editor and it gets posted. 0:36:11.360 --> 0:36:13.439 It's not like news dot com, it's not like daily mail. 0:36:13.520 --> 0:36:16.680 These things go through other academics, they are reviewed, and 0:36:16.719 --> 0:36:19.239 they are you know, it's actually quite expensive to do 0:36:19.280 --> 0:36:24.000 this type of research. And personally, I felt as though 0:36:24.040 --> 0:36:27.960 I took a really different turn once I learned this information. 0:36:28.239 --> 0:36:30.400 I initially was like, this is so entertaining, This is 0:36:30.440 --> 0:36:35.279 so great. She got the whole world talking about this sport. Genius, 0:36:35.640 --> 0:36:39.439 this is her area of research. Incredible, She's literally done 0:36:39.480 --> 0:36:42.600 something that has achieved the purpose of getting this sport 0:36:42.600 --> 0:36:43.320 out to the world. 0:36:43.440 --> 0:36:45.200 Yeah, and saying that I don't know if people from 0:36:45.200 --> 0:36:47.839 the breaking community would love that. The reason why it's 0:36:47.840 --> 0:36:50.520 on a stage and a world platform something've spoken about 0:36:50.600 --> 0:36:51.960 is because people are laughing at it. 0:36:52.040 --> 0:36:54.799 This is where things got much more interesting to me. 0:36:55.280 --> 0:36:57.759 So two particular papers that one was published in June 0:36:57.760 --> 0:37:00.360 twenty twenty three that was called the Australian Breaking and 0:37:00.400 --> 0:37:04.480 the Olympic Games, The Possibilities and Politics of Sportification. There 0:37:04.520 --> 0:37:06.400 is another paper that she is the main author of 0:37:06.480 --> 0:37:09.320 called the Ethics of Living a Double Life, Rethinking ownership, 0:37:09.360 --> 0:37:12.520 authenticity and identity in Hip hop culture. Now she's the 0:37:12.520 --> 0:37:14.680 main author of both of those papers. So other people 0:37:14.680 --> 0:37:16.719 have contributed, but she's the main person who's put that 0:37:16.760 --> 0:37:21.719 research together. That paper specifically says, in this article we 0:37:21.800 --> 0:37:25.360 examine how Australian breakers have responded to and made sense 0:37:25.400 --> 0:37:29.160 of breaking becoming an Olympic sport. We have identified three 0:37:29.239 --> 0:37:33.759 key themes that underscore these responses. They are legitimacy, culture 0:37:34.120 --> 0:37:37.440 and agency. And the two that I'd like to focus 0:37:37.440 --> 0:37:41.440 on are legitimacy and culture. So the culture of breaking 0:37:41.520 --> 0:37:44.399 originated in the Bronx. It was predominantly by people of colour, 0:37:44.480 --> 0:37:47.480 of African American descent or Puerto Rican kids. It was 0:37:47.520 --> 0:37:51.359 bi marginalized groups to foster a sense of community and 0:37:51.440 --> 0:37:55.320 so a lot of the breaking community this underground world 0:37:55.440 --> 0:37:57.480 that's where breaking started and it was kind of a 0:37:57.520 --> 0:38:00.000 place for them to have a way to express themselves, 0:38:00.120 --> 0:38:03.600 to resolve conflict. That kind of thing they have expressed 0:38:03.800 --> 0:38:06.520 in her own research that they. 0:38:06.400 --> 0:38:08.840 Don't think that it becoming an Olympic. 0:38:08.480 --> 0:38:12.680 Sport gives respect to the cultural significance of the dance style. 0:38:12.520 --> 0:38:14.239 Well because it also commercializes it. 0:38:14.320 --> 0:38:16.480 That was the big debate around this was that by 0:38:16.480 --> 0:38:19.560 becoming an Olympic sport, it takes away the cultural essence 0:38:19.560 --> 0:38:21.880 of what of the expression and how it originated. 0:38:22.040 --> 0:38:23.040 It sanitizes it. 0:38:23.200 --> 0:38:25.759 Right if you attach a commercial element to it, you 0:38:25.840 --> 0:38:27.840 kind of take away the point of why this was 0:38:27.880 --> 0:38:30.600 created to begin with. Another thing that she said in 0:38:30.640 --> 0:38:34.080 the second paper that I mentioned was ethics of who 0:38:34.120 --> 0:38:38.440 can access and transverse hip hop's hierarchies of authority, and 0:38:38.560 --> 0:38:41.759 my opinion of that research was that she felt as 0:38:41.800 --> 0:38:45.919 though she was excluded from the higher respect levels of 0:38:46.080 --> 0:38:50.120 the breaking community, specifically because she was white, she was Australian, 0:38:50.160 --> 0:38:50.960 and she was female. 0:38:51.320 --> 0:38:54.319 I find that interesting because I have some friends that 0:38:54.440 --> 0:38:56.240 are huge in the breaking community. 0:38:56.360 --> 0:38:58.000 It's like so random to me, Britt, Like. 0:38:58.239 --> 0:38:59.680 I know a lot of people. So he was a 0:38:59.680 --> 0:39:01.960 friend at school, bit older than me, so I'm talking 0:39:01.960 --> 0:39:04.440 a long time, twenty years ago. He's been doing this. 0:39:05.080 --> 0:39:08.439 He's Australian and then he got married and had kids. 0:39:08.480 --> 0:39:10.880 He's a bit older than me now and the kids 0:39:11.000 --> 0:39:14.440 are huge in the breaking community. They traveled to competitions 0:39:14.520 --> 0:39:17.200 and they are one's a girl, one's a boy, and 0:39:17.320 --> 0:39:21.000 they are half Australian, half Hawaiian. But they have been 0:39:21.239 --> 0:39:26.680 wholeheartedly accepted and embraced by the breaking community of all ethnicities, 0:39:26.719 --> 0:39:28.480 like all around the world. So I find that I 0:39:28.480 --> 0:39:29.760 do find that an interesting point. 0:39:29.680 --> 0:39:31.440 Just of like what I have seen. Yeah, and that 0:39:31.600 --> 0:39:34.720 is my perspective of her research. She also did include 0:39:34.800 --> 0:39:38.280 the contrast of these perspectives as well, so she included 0:39:38.320 --> 0:39:40.120 the fact that a lot of the people in the 0:39:40.120 --> 0:39:42.920 breaking community were excited about it becoming a part of 0:39:42.960 --> 0:39:43.680 the Olympics. 0:39:44.160 --> 0:39:46.360 But I just don't know if you can. 0:39:46.200 --> 0:39:50.400 Be the most researched person on the planet in this field, 0:39:51.000 --> 0:39:54.920 examine people's concerns over the legitimacy and the cultural aspect 0:39:55.160 --> 0:39:59.560 of breaking, and then take those concerns and get out 0:39:59.560 --> 0:40:02.799 there do the sprinkler and the kangaroo. To me, it 0:40:02.920 --> 0:40:05.759 just isn't congruent. It doesn't seem to make sense to 0:40:05.800 --> 0:40:09.280 me that you would be respecting those people's criticisms, doing 0:40:09.360 --> 0:40:11.719 research on it, publishing the research, and. 0:40:11.680 --> 0:40:13.880 Then going out and doing that type of performance. I 0:40:13.960 --> 0:40:16.400 get that, but that's my point. She is so aware 0:40:16.440 --> 0:40:19.200 of it, so this would have been a very considered decision, 0:40:19.280 --> 0:40:21.280 and there are just as many people in the breaking 0:40:21.320 --> 0:40:24.160 community that wanted this to be included for the right 0:40:24.200 --> 0:40:26.880 reasons and for awareness as there were people that didn't 0:40:26.880 --> 0:40:29.680 want it to be included in terms of the culture. 0:40:29.719 --> 0:40:32.239 I completely agree, but I think what we saw her 0:40:32.320 --> 0:40:35.120 try to do is bring her culture into it. In 0:40:35.160 --> 0:40:36.759 a way, I think that's her trying to show the 0:40:36.800 --> 0:40:41.080 respect to like I get that this dance is layered 0:40:41.280 --> 0:40:44.080 with culture and history, and I'm thinking that she was 0:40:44.120 --> 0:40:46.600 making a really conscious effort to be patriotic and bring 0:40:46.600 --> 0:40:50.480 her culture into that. We have to take into consideration 0:40:50.560 --> 0:40:53.160 that this woman has dedicated her life to the study, 0:40:53.640 --> 0:40:56.200 so has to have made a decision based on that. 0:40:56.360 --> 0:40:58.080 Whether it was the right one or not is not 0:40:58.160 --> 0:41:00.880 for us to judge, but it's different to someone that 0:41:00.960 --> 0:41:02.400 just came off the street to do it. Like you 0:41:02.480 --> 0:41:05.840 have to consider the fact that she has dedicated years 0:41:05.880 --> 0:41:09.600 upon years of studying nothing but the breaking community. 0:41:09.840 --> 0:41:12.480 As much as there's been so many memes because we 0:41:12.520 --> 0:41:14.600 love to MEMI five things in Australia that have come 0:41:14.600 --> 0:41:17.000 off the back of this, there has been a much 0:41:17.040 --> 0:41:19.160 more serious conversation that's come to light in the last 0:41:19.200 --> 0:41:19.719 couple of days. 0:41:19.760 --> 0:41:20.759 And I also think it's the. 0:41:20.719 --> 0:41:25.680 Reason why the feelings around ray Gun have shifted, especially 0:41:25.719 --> 0:41:29.040 in Australian media. Australia's Chef de mission in Paris, her 0:41:29.120 --> 0:41:31.880 name is Adam Mears. She came out and gave a 0:41:31.920 --> 0:41:36.080 statement around the backlash that Raygun was receiving. And this 0:41:36.200 --> 0:41:38.880 really had to do with the sexism and misogyny that 0:41:39.040 --> 0:41:42.800 she sees is loaded into the criticism that Raygun is receiving. 0:41:43.000 --> 0:41:44.040 This is what she had to say. 0:41:44.800 --> 0:41:47.560 If you don't know Rachel's story in two thousand and eight, 0:41:47.640 --> 0:41:52.040 she was locked in a room crying being involved in 0:41:52.080 --> 0:41:56.080 a maldominated sport as the only woman, and it took 0:41:56.160 --> 0:42:00.279 great courage for her to continue on and fight for 0:42:00.360 --> 0:42:03.480 her opportunity to participate in a sport that she loved 0:42:04.280 --> 0:42:07.760 and that got her to winning the Olympic qualifying event 0:42:07.840 --> 0:42:11.240 to be here in Paris. She is the best breakdancer 0:42:11.440 --> 0:42:13.799 female that we have for Australia. 0:42:13.960 --> 0:42:15.880 She also went on to say, now you look at 0:42:15.880 --> 0:42:18.200 the history of what we have had as women athletes 0:42:18.280 --> 0:42:21.279 and what we have faced in terms of criticism, belittlement, 0:42:21.400 --> 0:42:24.279 judgment and simple comments like they shouldn't be here. I've 0:42:24.320 --> 0:42:25.959 really thought about this because I was like, I don't 0:42:26.000 --> 0:42:28.880 know how I feel about this statement, only because I 0:42:28.880 --> 0:42:33.759 would understand if the overall caliber of the female competitors 0:42:34.320 --> 0:42:36.479 was the same as Reagun and people were saying, Okay, 0:42:36.480 --> 0:42:39.440 well this is embarrassing, but I think it almost belittles 0:42:39.760 --> 0:42:44.200 the entire competition because there were incredible female breakers in 0:42:44.239 --> 0:42:48.520 that who were not limited by their ability or access 0:42:48.600 --> 0:42:51.640 to the sports. Maybe the culture within Australia is very 0:42:51.640 --> 0:42:53.760 different and it has been limiting for Reagun. 0:42:53.800 --> 0:42:54.440 I'm not a breaker. 0:42:54.440 --> 0:42:55.960 I do not know what it is like to be 0:42:56.000 --> 0:42:58.959 a female in that sport in this country. The only 0:42:59.040 --> 0:43:01.279 thing about this kind of was like, I don't know 0:43:01.280 --> 0:43:02.920 if I agree with it, and then it kind of 0:43:02.920 --> 0:43:06.319 sits a bit weird for me. Is this idea that 0:43:06.400 --> 0:43:09.040 feels a little bit like false victimhood. And there's been 0:43:09.080 --> 0:43:12.720 a lot of media outlets that have been comparing Raygun 0:43:13.160 --> 0:43:16.759 to Eric the Eel. Now, you guys might remember Eric 0:43:16.800 --> 0:43:20.400 the Eel who is iconic. So at the two thousand 0:43:20.400 --> 0:43:23.000 Olympics in Sydney, Eric the Eel swam the one hundred 0:43:23.040 --> 0:43:23.600 meter race. 0:43:24.360 --> 0:43:25.280 He set a time. 0:43:25.640 --> 0:43:27.440 It was a one hundred meters, but he set the 0:43:27.480 --> 0:43:30.880 slowest time on record, which was one minute and fifty 0:43:30.920 --> 0:43:34.160 two seconds. But the reason why this is iconic is 0:43:34.200 --> 0:43:37.680 because he also won his heat in that race. So 0:43:37.960 --> 0:43:39.960 the reason why I think this is very very different 0:43:40.080 --> 0:43:42.680 is because this was a special heat that was put 0:43:42.719 --> 0:43:48.319 together for athletes who were unable to access training facilities 0:43:48.400 --> 0:43:51.759 because of being impoverished or disadvantaged. So he came from 0:43:51.760 --> 0:43:55.080 the Equatorial Guinea. He had never seen a fifty meter 0:43:55.200 --> 0:43:57.879 pool prior to rocking up at the Olympics. He had 0:43:57.880 --> 0:44:00.360 trained only in the one only twins to meet a 0:44:00.400 --> 0:44:03.480 pool that existed in the country and learned. He learned 0:44:03.480 --> 0:44:06.239 to swim in a creek that also had crocodiles in it. 0:44:06.560 --> 0:44:08.680 So I don't think it's to make his quick. 0:44:10.880 --> 0:44:15.239 It's unbelievable that he even had the capacity to learn 0:44:15.280 --> 0:44:18.560 to swim, let alone. The rags to Riches's story about 0:44:18.560 --> 0:44:20.400 how he made it to the Olympics, it was and 0:44:20.719 --> 0:44:24.200 I remember watching the race. Every single person in the 0:44:24.200 --> 0:44:27.600 Aquatic Center and the Homebush Olympics was screaming. They were 0:44:27.680 --> 0:44:29.839 up cheering for him. The other two people in his 0:44:30.000 --> 0:44:32.960 race were disqualified, and that's because they both did a 0:44:32.960 --> 0:44:35.239 false start. And the other two people that were in 0:44:35.239 --> 0:44:39.280 that race were Cariimba from Nigeria and fukud Oripov who's 0:44:39.280 --> 0:44:42.719 from Tajikistan. So it was a completely different race. And 0:44:42.760 --> 0:44:45.320 that's why when I was seeing these comparisons being drawn, 0:44:45.400 --> 0:44:49.279 I was like, I think that's a really tough thing 0:44:49.680 --> 0:44:52.160 that we are doing because I don't think that she 0:44:52.320 --> 0:44:56.080 is a victim. I don't think that Regan is oppressed. 0:44:56.120 --> 0:44:59.439 I don't think that she has come from a minority beyond, yes, 0:44:59.520 --> 0:45:02.520 maybe being the small female population. But I don't think 0:45:02.560 --> 0:45:05.160 that we can draw the same parallels because one person 0:45:05.320 --> 0:45:08.959 is and has been far more severely disadvantaged, and that's 0:45:09.000 --> 0:45:11.480 why the world got behind them. I don't think it 0:45:11.520 --> 0:45:14.200 was because of sex, and that's really important. I don't 0:45:14.200 --> 0:45:16.439 think it's because one's female one's male. On the other 0:45:16.480 --> 0:45:18.319 side of that, I agree that women have had at 0:45:18.320 --> 0:45:18.960 heart in sport. 0:45:19.080 --> 0:45:20.960 We know that, like that is a fact. We have 0:45:21.000 --> 0:45:23.400 struggled and we don't get paid the same and we 0:45:23.440 --> 0:45:26.840 are ridiculed, and that is the history of women in sport. 0:45:27.239 --> 0:45:30.080 I made a comparison also to Eric the Eel, but 0:45:30.200 --> 0:45:31.799 I did in a different way. I'm not doing it 0:45:31.840 --> 0:45:33.879 in the sense of and I said it to you two. 0:45:34.000 --> 0:45:35.920 I didn't do it in the sense of victimhood, look 0:45:35.960 --> 0:45:37.680 where they've come from. I did it in the sense 0:45:37.760 --> 0:45:40.160 of I think Keisha maybe made the comment where she 0:45:40.160 --> 0:45:42.040 said she shouldn't be there, she's not good enough, and 0:45:42.080 --> 0:45:43.920 I said, well, she is good enough because she was 0:45:43.960 --> 0:45:47.200 the best in her country. Like Eric the Eel. We 0:45:47.239 --> 0:45:49.319 all know Eric the Eel was never going to go 0:45:49.360 --> 0:45:51.799 and win that race, like win the Olympics. Yeah, but 0:45:52.000 --> 0:45:54.040 you cannot deny the fact that he was the best 0:45:54.040 --> 0:45:56.080 in his country. And that's what the Olympics are. If 0:45:56.120 --> 0:45:57.960 you can compete to be the best in your country, 0:45:58.360 --> 0:46:00.000 you don't have to be the best in the world. 0:46:00.080 --> 0:46:02.359 This is what the Olympics is weeding out. But if 0:46:02.400 --> 0:46:05.360 you make the best in your country, for whatever reason, 0:46:05.400 --> 0:46:06.799 I think you should be allowed to go and have 0:46:06.840 --> 0:46:11.680 your chance. Raygun did not hurt a soul. She went 0:46:11.719 --> 0:46:14.480 out there and had the fucking time of her life. 0:46:15.000 --> 0:46:16.959 It is a dream for her. She wore the green 0:46:17.000 --> 0:46:19.680 and gold, she was patriotic, She's dedicated her life to this. 0:46:19.840 --> 0:46:21.440 She was like, why wouldn't I take the chance to 0:46:21.600 --> 0:46:24.640 present my country? And for that I just think well done. 0:46:24.800 --> 0:46:26.719 I think that's a very interesting point you said, because 0:46:26.719 --> 0:46:29.360 one of the other criticisms that people on the internet 0:46:29.400 --> 0:46:32.680 are having is that she's taken this opportunity away from 0:46:32.760 --> 0:46:34.600 someone else, right, so someone else might have had a 0:46:34.640 --> 0:46:37.080 dream of going and representing Australia in the breaking for 0:46:37.120 --> 0:46:39.080 the first time it's ever been included in the Olympics, 0:46:39.080 --> 0:46:41.359 and she took that opportunity from them. 0:46:41.560 --> 0:46:44.120 But she did it because she competed in a trial. 0:46:44.440 --> 0:46:45.920 I don't know where were they. 0:46:46.120 --> 0:46:47.600 That's kind of what I mean, Like, I think that 0:46:47.600 --> 0:46:50.880 that is not a fair criticism. But I am intrigued 0:46:50.880 --> 0:46:53.520 as to whether you think the amount of trolling, the 0:46:53.680 --> 0:46:56.400 type of trolling, and the type of commentary about it 0:46:56.520 --> 0:46:58.960 or even criticism, do you think that's gender. 0:46:59.080 --> 0:47:01.040 I think it is very, very, very challenging to put 0:47:01.040 --> 0:47:03.560 a number on it. I know that she's experienced criticism 0:47:03.560 --> 0:47:05.479 for lots of things, not just her performance, but also 0:47:05.560 --> 0:47:09.000 the choice that she made to wear the Australian tracksuit. 0:47:09.120 --> 0:47:10.880 I think Australia did her dirty, like she looked like 0:47:10.920 --> 0:47:12.520 she was wearing a lawn bowls outfit or she was 0:47:12.520 --> 0:47:15.680 going to play cricket. Like I understand why the outfit 0:47:16.120 --> 0:47:18.960 didn't fit the type of war that I think most 0:47:19.000 --> 0:47:21.160 people in the breaking community would normally wear. 0:47:21.239 --> 0:47:26.400 It didn't give cricket. It really exuded like T twenty. 0:47:26.680 --> 0:47:28.920 It really exuded cricket or lawn bowls. 0:47:29.120 --> 0:47:31.320 But the problem with that is is I also understand 0:47:31.360 --> 0:47:34.040 the patriotism of her still wanting to choose to wear it. 0:47:34.160 --> 0:47:38.239 So that is almost once again the Australian Olympic organizers 0:47:38.280 --> 0:47:41.160 not understanding the sport of which they've put athletes into. 0:47:41.280 --> 0:47:44.359 Yeah, but we had our male breaker, Jay Attack, who 0:47:44.440 --> 0:47:48.600 competed also who also wore the Olympic get up, like 0:47:48.680 --> 0:47:50.840 he chose to wear that because some of them were streetwear. 0:47:50.920 --> 0:47:54.160 But he also chose to wear it and no one 0:47:54.400 --> 0:47:55.960 trolled him, so I think different. 0:47:56.040 --> 0:47:58.640 Yeah, it doesn't have a collar, it doesn't look as 0:47:59.200 --> 0:48:00.960 I'm gonna say, I'm so sorry. I know that this 0:48:01.000 --> 0:48:03.719 sounds horrible because I pointed out a lot of the criticisms. 0:48:04.239 --> 0:48:07.279 It looks really nerdy. It doesn't look streets like she's 0:48:07.480 --> 0:48:08.720 up there fashion. 0:48:08.960 --> 0:48:11.280 I totally understand that, but I think it is important 0:48:11.280 --> 0:48:13.880 because people are gonna draw this comparison. They're gonna say 0:48:14.040 --> 0:48:16.799 he didn't receive feedback she did. The thing that I 0:48:16.880 --> 0:48:19.719 think makes that outfit look daggier is the fact that 0:48:19.760 --> 0:48:22.680 it is a collared shirt, which really does pertain to 0:48:22.760 --> 0:48:24.960 sort of like a lawn bowls or like a cricket. 0:48:25.000 --> 0:48:28.120 Like we've said, his outfit, even though it's the Australian one, 0:48:28.280 --> 0:48:30.360 it's a different type of uniform. And I think the 0:48:30.400 --> 0:48:32.719 big question is what you ask Kesh is like does 0:48:32.760 --> 0:48:35.680 the trolling come back to being gendered? And it's almost 0:48:35.680 --> 0:48:38.239 too hard to tell. I think a lot of the 0:48:38.360 --> 0:48:41.400 love and now the adoration and she's the queen is 0:48:41.480 --> 0:48:43.680 also because it's gendered. And I think of people like 0:48:43.680 --> 0:48:46.960 Stephen Bradbury. At least he made it to the final, right, 0:48:47.000 --> 0:48:49.360 he was in the final race, so he was still 0:48:49.360 --> 0:48:52.440 one of the top ten in his sport. Yes he 0:48:52.520 --> 0:48:55.000 won when he was like coming last because everyone fell over, 0:48:55.320 --> 0:48:58.000 but that's been a meme that's been running for twenty years. 0:48:58.040 --> 0:49:03.200 So I'm like he received that criticism unrelenting. People still 0:49:03.280 --> 0:49:06.000 use it as a reference for like pipping someone to 0:49:06.040 --> 0:49:08.560 the end as a win, you know. So I don't 0:49:08.719 --> 0:49:11.200 know if we can bring gender into this, and I 0:49:11.320 --> 0:49:13.680 might get absolutely flamed for that because I think a 0:49:13.680 --> 0:49:15.319 lot of media at the moment is saying that this 0:49:15.440 --> 0:49:17.879 is very, very gendered. And I would say often I'm 0:49:17.880 --> 0:49:20.360 the person in this podcast that points out the gender 0:49:20.400 --> 0:49:23.719 discrimination or the gender indifference. But I think in this instance, 0:49:24.200 --> 0:49:27.080 we are comparing females with females, We are comparing women 0:49:27.080 --> 0:49:30.560 against women. It was a woman's competition in sport, and 0:49:30.680 --> 0:49:33.759 she was at the bottom against all the other incredible 0:49:33.800 --> 0:49:37.600 female athletes, And so I don't know if in that instance, 0:49:37.680 --> 0:49:40.600 in the Olympics as a whole, we can say that 0:49:40.680 --> 0:49:43.600 the criticism that she's receiving is gendered. I think it's 0:49:43.920 --> 0:49:45.840 based on a reflection of who she's competing against. 0:49:45.920 --> 0:49:48.680 Yeah, and this is a role reversal Fee and I Laura, 0:49:48.760 --> 0:49:50.120 But I think a lot of it has to do 0:49:50.160 --> 0:49:52.319 with gender for sure, when we won't know, But I 0:49:52.560 --> 0:49:55.280 don't believe well makes you think that. I just don't 0:49:55.280 --> 0:49:58.719 believe that if a male did that, the reaction would 0:49:58.760 --> 0:50:00.200 be the same. I think it would be like what 0:50:00.280 --> 0:50:03.360 a fucking legend, like just fucking owned it, Like, you know, 0:50:03.480 --> 0:50:05.879 I like more Alarican culture. You mean, yeah, I do. 0:50:05.960 --> 0:50:10.439 I potentially think it has a lot to do with age, sex, Yeah, 0:50:10.440 --> 0:50:13.360 and very obviously her performance, like her performance was subpar, 0:50:13.520 --> 0:50:16.480 But I don't believe that ridicule in the pylon would 0:50:16.480 --> 0:50:18.319 have been as much if it was say a twenty 0:50:18.400 --> 0:50:20.520 year old male that did the performance. But I think 0:50:20.520 --> 0:50:22.000 it would be remiss of us to say it has 0:50:22.120 --> 0:50:25.840 nothing to do with agism and sexism in a smaller capacity. 0:50:26.120 --> 0:50:28.640 My favorite part of this, to be honest, is and 0:50:28.680 --> 0:50:30.160 I take my hat off to her, but it's her 0:50:30.239 --> 0:50:32.880 response because I can't be sure that I would have 0:50:32.920 --> 0:50:35.799 the same response if the world was ridiculing me and 0:50:35.840 --> 0:50:38.239 mocking me for something that I if I went out 0:50:38.280 --> 0:50:40.680 and thought I gave my best for something like I 0:50:40.719 --> 0:50:42.680 actually feel really sad for her if I thought I 0:50:42.719 --> 0:50:46.200 had performed to the best that I could and the 0:50:46.280 --> 0:50:49.520 world was mocking me the adeles of the world, like 0:50:49.800 --> 0:50:54.520 there is no one that does of the world. I 0:50:54.600 --> 0:50:55.440 know half it burns. 0:50:55.480 --> 0:50:58.279 Some of those moves were harther than I feel like 0:50:58.400 --> 0:50:58.960 I would. 0:50:58.760 --> 0:51:00.719 Go into hiding. But I I love that she just 0:51:00.800 --> 0:51:03.120 owned it and she said, guys, don't be afraid to 0:51:03.120 --> 0:51:05.879 be different. I'm me, I, you know, like I made 0:51:05.920 --> 0:51:08.040 it my own and that's what I'm doing. Like she 0:51:08.160 --> 0:51:10.040 just came out and owned it, and that kind cannot 0:51:10.040 --> 0:51:10.520 have been easy. 0:51:10.600 --> 0:51:12.560 Yeah, I agree with this, and I think that that 0:51:12.719 --> 0:51:16.200 is the reason why the conversation around her has shifted 0:51:16.280 --> 0:51:19.760 so greatly. I think it's her ability to be self 0:51:19.800 --> 0:51:24.000 deprecating doing the skit with the inspired unemployed, like leaning 0:51:24.120 --> 0:51:27.480 into that. That is what I think Australians love to see. 0:51:27.520 --> 0:51:29.080 It's like, you can make fun of yourself. 0:51:29.120 --> 0:51:29.839 You're an icon. 0:51:30.120 --> 0:51:32.560 You're not taking this too seriously. You're an icon and 0:51:32.640 --> 0:51:35.400 everything that she's done so far. As much as I 0:51:35.440 --> 0:51:38.319 think people have very much and were very harsh in 0:51:38.400 --> 0:51:42.799 ridiculing her around her performance, people in general are now 0:51:42.880 --> 0:51:45.120 rallying around her. Like I've seen everyone from Mum and 0:51:45.160 --> 0:51:48.880 Mia to pedestrian to like fashion critical. Everyone is calling 0:51:48.880 --> 0:51:51.560 her an icon now and it's because of her reaction 0:51:51.680 --> 0:51:53.800 to this criticism, and I think that that is something 0:51:53.840 --> 0:51:57.040 that's probably way more aspirational than her actual performance themselves. 0:51:57.120 --> 0:51:58.520 But I would love to see because I think that 0:51:58.640 --> 0:52:01.960 like every wedding, every twenty first, there's gonna be someone 0:52:02.040 --> 0:52:06.120 now in the fucking like kangaroo hop No, the sprinklet Well, 0:52:06.120 --> 0:52:07.640 we're already doing that, but we're gonna do it with 0:52:07.640 --> 0:52:08.520 a bit of raygunflare. 0:52:08.560 --> 0:52:12.400 Now I might go as her for Halloween. He shot 0:52:12.680 --> 0:52:13.279 to be fair. 0:52:13.360 --> 0:52:16.200 I actually do tip my hat to her because I 0:52:16.400 --> 0:52:18.800 had no idea about the history. Like you said, Laura, 0:52:19.040 --> 0:52:21.080 I had no idea about any of this stuff. I 0:52:21.080 --> 0:52:22.799 didn't know about the cultural impacts of it. 0:52:22.840 --> 0:52:23.480 And now I do. 0:52:23.840 --> 0:52:26.720 If that's something that she has created for the world, 0:52:26.960 --> 0:52:27.560 well done. 0:52:27.880 --> 0:52:29.719 That is how you know you have made it. If 0:52:29.760 --> 0:52:32.640 somebody can dress up as you for Halloween and just 0:52:32.719 --> 0:52:34.960 rock up to a party and everyone knows who you are, 0:52:35.040 --> 0:52:39.719 then you've made it. Well it's time for accidentally unfiltered. 0:52:40.239 --> 0:52:42.399 Last night, my partner and I were getting it on, 0:52:42.520 --> 0:52:44.600 and for context, he always jokes that I don't like 0:52:44.640 --> 0:52:47.440 getting on top and I never do it so long 0:52:47.440 --> 0:52:49.680 and behold, I jumped on top. I was doing my 0:52:49.760 --> 0:52:53.120 thing when he raises his hand up or kid has. 0:52:53.000 --> 0:52:55.880 A question, Yeah, like open palm, excuse me, miss, I 0:52:55.880 --> 0:52:56.400 have a question. 0:52:56.680 --> 0:52:58.600 I think he's impressed with me going on top and 0:52:58.640 --> 0:53:01.400 having a good time. He's throwing out a high five, 0:53:01.880 --> 0:53:04.160 so I give him a high five back. He looks 0:53:04.200 --> 0:53:06.520 at me confused. Turns out he was going for a 0:53:06.520 --> 0:53:08.960 little titty slap and instead I five did him and 0:53:09.000 --> 0:53:10.160 completely ruined the mood. 0:53:11.880 --> 0:53:13.160 Who slaps a titty? 0:53:13.600 --> 0:53:18.359 Heaps of people give a little titty thing slash like. 0:53:18.600 --> 0:53:20.440 You don't hold You don't hold your hand up long 0:53:20.560 --> 0:53:23.080 enough to smack your titty, Like, how could you confuse 0:53:23.120 --> 0:53:26.439 a little like grab or something? I'm sorry, that's on him. 0:53:26.760 --> 0:53:29.040 I think she was enthusiastic. I think they were both 0:53:29.080 --> 0:53:32.319 too enthusiastic in this movie. If some guy, if I 0:53:32.400 --> 0:53:36.080 was on top and he went and high fived my 0:53:36.160 --> 0:53:38.920 tit like tit punched me with an open hand, I 0:53:39.000 --> 0:53:40.919 would also be confused. 0:53:41.239 --> 0:53:44.520 I'm confused about the angle me. The high five is 0:53:44.560 --> 0:53:47.600 a much higher like shoulder, and he's laying down and 0:53:47.640 --> 0:53:49.319 she's on top, so he would have gone like this, 0:53:49.719 --> 0:53:51.719 he's on his back, he would have lifted his hand. 0:53:51.760 --> 0:53:53.120 He's not bringing up in the air. 0:53:53.280 --> 0:53:55.799 I have never ever in my life been on top 0:53:55.880 --> 0:53:58.680 and had someone open palm slap my tit. 0:53:58.880 --> 0:54:01.480 I've needed someone to hold it support. 0:54:01.160 --> 0:54:03.480 So they couldtop bouncing around, smacking you in the face. 0:54:03.600 --> 0:54:05.439 You should knock someone out so they have to hold 0:54:05.440 --> 0:54:06.440 a booon. 0:54:06.600 --> 0:54:08.920 I remember the only time that I have like vivid 0:54:08.920 --> 0:54:12.000 memories of high fiving someone after sex was Matt and 0:54:12.400 --> 0:54:14.799 I'm convinced it was when I got pregnant. I high 0:54:14.880 --> 0:54:17.719 fived him after la because I was like just a 0:54:17.760 --> 0:54:19.640 good organic, like that's how you make a baby. No, 0:54:19.680 --> 0:54:21.520 we were trying to make a baby, and then we 0:54:21.600 --> 0:54:23.520 high fived, and I'm pretty certain that that was the 0:54:23.560 --> 0:54:24.400 time that we made. 0:54:24.320 --> 0:54:26.920 Lola, that's how you make a baby. 0:54:27.080 --> 0:54:30.840 Yeah five ben Fish pumped like pumped them fist pumped 0:54:31.800 --> 0:54:33.200 over how good the sex was? Yeah? 0:54:33.280 --> 0:54:34.640 Over loll done when you did good? 0:54:34.760 --> 0:54:38.000 When you when you just nail it, like sometimes it's 0:54:38.120 --> 0:54:39.680 just like perfection. 0:54:39.800 --> 0:54:41.160 That's how I felt up to the city to surf. 0:54:41.160 --> 0:54:43.840 I high five mat after that, I was like, the 0:54:43.960 --> 0:54:47.360 job well done. Sucking sweet, what's gonna suck. 0:54:47.200 --> 0:54:47.600 For the roof? 0:54:47.920 --> 0:54:50.200 Mine suck for the week. And it is a big 0:54:50.320 --> 0:54:54.120 update that you've all been waiting for. Delilah is officially 0:54:54.239 --> 0:54:56.279 kicked out of her dog school. So it happened. The 0:54:56.360 --> 0:54:59.680 probation period is over and she did not make what happened? Wait, 0:54:59.680 --> 0:55:01.919 I need to know she doesn't know how to ride 0:55:01.960 --> 0:55:04.600 in the car. She doesn't ride in the car with 0:55:04.640 --> 0:55:07.680 other dogs very well. No, Yeah, she's a menace. That's literally. 0:55:07.719 --> 0:55:10.840 I did also see video evidence. It was not good. 0:55:11.280 --> 0:55:15.880 So she's out. She's out. It's really sad. It was 0:55:16.000 --> 0:55:19.960 I and Jody message. She was really sad. She's like, 0:55:20.000 --> 0:55:21.560 I feel like it's a breakup, and I was like, 0:55:21.600 --> 0:55:23.440 it is a breakup. I was like, you've we've all 0:55:23.480 --> 0:55:25.640 three of us have been together for like three years now. 0:55:25.719 --> 0:55:29.399 Dumb to me. Jody is britz walker dog walker, one 0:55:29.400 --> 0:55:29.719 of them. 0:55:29.880 --> 0:55:33.880 She doesn't take walks on the lead. Jody's Brits Walker. 0:55:34.360 --> 0:55:37.160 She puts the started caller on her next down the street. 0:55:37.600 --> 0:55:41.880 You were appreciate she's she's a britzkimp. No, she's been 0:55:41.920 --> 0:55:44.680 amazing And this is not on Jody at all. It's 0:55:45.200 --> 0:55:48.560 it's too much to obviously manage, and I have been 0:55:48.560 --> 0:55:50.560 trying to work on it. Now people might know this 0:55:50.600 --> 0:55:52.439 and be able to help me, but it has gotten worse. 0:55:52.440 --> 0:55:56.560 She's been with there for three years. Delilah's just turned three, 0:55:56.640 --> 0:55:58.279 so she's been with there for two or a bit years. Sorry, 0:55:58.320 --> 0:56:02.320 Delilah's just turned three, and it has gotten worse in 0:56:02.320 --> 0:56:04.319 the last six months. It's almost like Delilah's going into 0:56:04.440 --> 0:56:05.120 a regression. 0:56:05.160 --> 0:56:07.360 So Delilah's a teenager now she's Yeah. 0:56:07.160 --> 0:56:09.120 I'd love to know if this isn't actual, because they 0:56:09.160 --> 0:56:11.160 do have a regression at like one one and a half, 0:56:11.440 --> 0:56:13.839 So I'm wondering if there's another one now because it's 0:56:13.840 --> 0:56:16.000 just it's just happening out of the blue. So that's 0:56:16.000 --> 0:56:20.799 my suck. I genuinely was upset, like I felt like 0:56:21.480 --> 0:56:25.000 a parent whose child was like running out of control 0:56:25.040 --> 0:56:26.799 and that she couldn't control it. That's how I felt. 0:56:26.840 --> 0:56:28.879 And I was embarrassed. I was like, I'm so sorry 0:56:28.920 --> 0:56:29.560 for her behavior. 0:56:29.800 --> 0:56:30.360 Humiliated. 0:56:30.520 --> 0:56:34.560 I was humiliated, chore because now Brn's like west Atta. 0:56:35.239 --> 0:56:36.719 She's so naughty. She got kicked out. 0:56:36.920 --> 0:56:39.120 Yeah, so that's it was a really sad day. So 0:56:39.200 --> 0:56:40.240 it's it's hard. 0:56:40.440 --> 0:56:42.920 It's been really hard for me. Okay, what's your suite. 0:56:43.360 --> 0:56:45.040 My sweet for the week was I decided on a 0:56:45.040 --> 0:56:47.719 wedding planner. So we've officially got the wedding planner in 0:56:47.920 --> 0:56:49.680 and they have locked in some venues for us to 0:56:49.680 --> 0:56:52.000 look at, and I just feel like immediately a weight 0:56:52.160 --> 0:56:54.279 taken off my shoulder. Laura and I were having a 0:56:54.360 --> 0:56:56.120 joke the other day because you guys might remember when 0:56:56.200 --> 0:56:58.960 Laura got her initial wedding planner and they were a scammer. 0:57:00.760 --> 0:57:03.160 She's scared, she was a scamed I've forgotten about this. 0:57:03.400 --> 0:57:06.239 I probably haven't told you guys. I can't even remember 0:57:06.280 --> 0:57:07.839 if I told you the whole story or not, because 0:57:07.840 --> 0:57:09.800 I think at the time it was no it was 0:57:09.840 --> 0:57:10.440 still happening. 0:57:10.440 --> 0:57:12.160 It was like I think they were still involved with 0:57:12.239 --> 0:57:13.880 actual plans and you wanted them to. 0:57:15.239 --> 0:57:15.960 Yeah, well I couldn't. 0:57:15.960 --> 0:57:18.560 I couldn't tell what was happening because I think she 0:57:18.640 --> 0:57:19.320 was still in business. 0:57:19.360 --> 0:57:20.680 But yeah, we booked a. 0:57:20.960 --> 0:57:22.800 Let's save it, we do it on Tuesday, let's come 0:57:22.800 --> 0:57:23.040 back to. 0:57:23.000 --> 0:57:23.680 Your wedding planner. 0:57:23.680 --> 0:57:27.400 And she ended up being a scam artist on multiple levels. 0:57:28.640 --> 0:57:29.600 That's a whole nother story. 0:57:29.680 --> 0:57:32.280 Let's talk about it next week. Okay, I can update 0:57:32.280 --> 0:57:33.080 you on that anyway. 0:57:33.280 --> 0:57:35.400 My suck for the week, to be honest, I almost 0:57:35.400 --> 0:57:36.800 want to say I don't have a suck this week 0:57:36.840 --> 0:57:40.760 because in comparison to the last couple of weeks, and like, 0:57:40.800 --> 0:57:43.080 we're still there's a lot at the moment that we're 0:57:43.120 --> 0:57:45.680 working through as a family. But I think so, look, 0:57:45.680 --> 0:57:47.200 I'm not going to say a suck because it feels 0:57:47.200 --> 0:57:49.560 really insignificant to all the big things that have been happening. 0:57:49.720 --> 0:57:51.280 But I have a sweep for the week, and that 0:57:51.400 --> 0:57:54.840 is that on Saturday, my mum hasn't really been up 0:57:54.840 --> 0:57:57.439 to Sydney in a long time because she's been caring 0:57:57.440 --> 0:57:59.240 for Neil and she's been down in Wollongong, And every 0:57:59.240 --> 0:58:02.000 time we've had to see Mom, we've had to travel 0:58:02.040 --> 0:58:04.040 down there and we've been spending heaps of time in Woongong. 0:58:04.040 --> 0:58:06.800 But Saturday Mom came up. She spent some time in Sydney. 0:58:06.840 --> 0:58:09.000 We went to the farmers' markets, were doing cute things 0:58:09.040 --> 0:58:11.160 with the kids. We've organized to go on a p 0:58:11.240 --> 0:58:14.520 and O cruise together, like we're doing stuff. We're doing 0:58:14.560 --> 0:58:17.360 stuff as a family and also like to keep Mum 0:58:17.560 --> 0:58:20.080 sort of like you know, busy and her mind off it. 0:58:20.480 --> 0:58:21.640 Yeah, as much as possible. 0:58:21.680 --> 0:58:23.320 So that was a really we had a really nice 0:58:23.360 --> 0:58:25.840 day and then obviously we had the city to surf 0:58:25.840 --> 0:58:27.320 on the Sunday, which was just great. I just feel 0:58:27.360 --> 0:58:29.480 like it's been a really great little family weekend and 0:58:29.520 --> 0:58:32.680 family week. That was my highlights and I love that. Yeah, 0:58:32.720 --> 0:58:35.720 I feel like my cup is full. My cup is full. 0:58:36.080 --> 0:58:36.560 What was that? 0:58:36.840 --> 0:58:38.480 I don't know. I was like, that's all l my 0:58:38.560 --> 0:58:39.240 cup is full. 0:58:40.360 --> 0:58:42.120 Well that's it from us, guys. That was a nice 0:58:42.120 --> 0:58:43.439 finish for Laura. Thank you. 0:58:43.440 --> 0:58:45.240 You are so welcome my love. Guys. 0:58:45.280 --> 0:58:47.480 Please keep sending in your ask on cuts to our 0:58:47.520 --> 0:58:50.440 Instagram life One Cup podcast, You're accidently unfiltered, maybe your 0:58:50.480 --> 0:58:52.840 follow ups, anything you think that we need to see. 0:58:53.240 --> 0:58:55.120 We love to hear it. You'll always be anonymous. 0:58:55.560 --> 0:58:56.920 You can also jump on YouTube. 0:58:56.960 --> 0:58:59.080 You can watch all of the episodes and the ask 0:58:59.120 --> 0:59:01.760 guncut questions on YouTube and you know the to. 0:59:01.720 --> 0:59:03.720 You Mum, Tay, dadte dog te friends, and share the 0:59:03.840 --> 0:59:05.760 love because we love love 0:59:17.880 --> 0:59:17.920 M