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Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast.

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Speaker 2: It's the podcast for the time poor parent who just answers.

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Speaker 1: Now once a month we have a look at the

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Speaker 1: latest science that affects us as parents, what we can

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Speaker 1: do to be better for our kids, what we can

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Speaker 1: do to be better for ourselves. And Kylie, this month

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Speaker 1: three incredible, really fascinating, really fascinating studies to talk about.

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Speaker 1: Walk us through what we've got and let's go.

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Speaker 2: We're going to talk about the positive outcomes that come

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Speaker 2: from being connected and wellbeing. Yep, the power of touch

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Speaker 2: and how it has the capacity to ease pain, depression,

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Speaker 2: and anxiety.

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Speaker 1: Great, and we're also going to look.

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Speaker 2: At how anger is bad for our health and more

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Speaker 2: ways than we thought.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and new research coming out highlighting that anger is

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Speaker 1: literally literally killing us. So where do you want to start?

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Speaker 1: Do you want to start with internet connection and well being?

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Speaker 2: Let's start there.

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Speaker 1: Okay. One of my favorite psychology research is a guy

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Speaker 1: called Andy Shipowski. He works at the University of Oxford

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Speaker 1: at the Oxford Internet Institute, and he's the guy who

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Speaker 1: famously a few years ago said that the amount of

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Speaker 1: screen time you have is the equivalent of how many

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Speaker 1: potatoes you eat. In terms of its impact on your

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Speaker 1: mental health. I keep telling you that, but it's okay

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Speaker 1: to be on the screen. Why are we worried about?

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Speaker 1: Is that what you mean?

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Speaker 2: No, but I think that for the average person, I

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Speaker 2: think we're clever enough to work this stuff out.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. So, I mean there's a huge amount of noise

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Speaker 1: being made at the moment because there are too many

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Speaker 1: of our kids and too many adults who are literally

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Speaker 1: finding their lives being destroyed because of screens, and so

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Speaker 1: this has become a massive hot button issue. We've covered

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Speaker 1: it quite a lot here on the Happy Families podcast.

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Speaker 1: I want to tell you about this study because it

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Speaker 1: highlights the great complexity of what we're talking about. So

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Speaker 1: Andy is well, it's actually Professor Andrew Shabulski. But Andy

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Speaker 1: is a really really smart guy, incredible to talk to,

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Speaker 1: and so insightful, really looks at things in unique ways.

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Speaker 1: He's done this study with more than two million participants

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Speaker 1: measuring their psychological well being from two thousand and six

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Speaker 1: to twenty twenty one. We're talking about one hundred and

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Speaker 1: sixty eight countries and using the power of compute, he

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Speaker 1: has done thirty three thousand, seven hundred and ninety two

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Speaker 1: different statistical models and subsets of data and found in

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Speaker 1: eighty five percent of the case eighty four point nine

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Speaker 1: percent of cases positive associations statistically significant positive associations between

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Speaker 1: being connected to the Internet and well being. So, whether

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Speaker 1: it's Latin America or Asia or Africa, whether it's Australia

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Speaker 1: or the United States, doesn't matter where it is. Internet

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Speaker 1: technologies and platforms have psychological consequences. There's a lot of

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Speaker 1: debate around those psychological consequences, but he's indicating, based on

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Speaker 1: this research that in eighty five percent of cases, looking

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Speaker 1: at eight different indicators life satisfaction, daily negative and positive experiences,

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Speaker 1: social wellbeing, physical wellbeing, community wellbeing, and experience of purpose,

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Speaker 1: an overwhelming positive correlation between all those measures of well

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Speaker 1: being and being able to use the Internet. Now, there

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Speaker 1: could be any number of other things that are impacting here.

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Speaker 1: What is saying, very very clearly is, and this is

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Speaker 1: a direct quote. Overall, we found that average associations were

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Speaker 1: consistent across Internet adoption predictors and well being outcomes, with

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Speaker 1: those who had access to or actively used the Internet

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Speaker 1: reporting meaningfully greater well being than those who did not.

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Speaker 2: To me, this is all about doing things in moderation.

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Speaker 2: Whether it's I enjoy chocolate and gelado fur dessert yeah yeah,

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Speaker 2: or chocolate chip cookies and milk, or whether it's I, like,

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Speaker 2: I don't know, going surfing, Like, it doesn't matter what

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Speaker 2: it is. If I'm doing it all day, every day

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Speaker 2: to the detriment of the rest of my life, then

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Speaker 2: anything we do has the potential to be detrimental to

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Speaker 2: our wellbeing.

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Speaker 1: To me, this is a really this is a really

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Speaker 1: big challenge that Andy Schboltsky is throwing to the world

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Speaker 1: with this data set, and I believe that he's right. Now,

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Speaker 1: here's what we know. We know that our young people, children, adolescents,

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Speaker 1: and even young adults, as a result of their limited

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Speaker 1: brain development, their lack of neurological maturation, they have less

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Speaker 1: capacity to inhibit and are more likely to be compelled

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Speaker 1: and addicted. We know that no matter what unhealthy behavior

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Speaker 1: they commenced, the earlier they start it, the moreklness that

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Speaker 1: they'll have problems with it later in life and even

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Speaker 1: even at the time.

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Speaker 2: But as you're sharing this, I'm not thinking about children.

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Speaker 2: This is not a study about That's exactly right. This

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Speaker 2: is a study about adults. And so for me, who

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Speaker 2: didn't grow up with computers, who didn't grow up with screens,

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Speaker 2: I don't have a huge skill set even in them.

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Speaker 2: It's not something that draws me in the same way

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Speaker 2: as it is for the kids. But as a parent,

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Speaker 2: our job is to obviously still scaffold them and provide

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Speaker 2: them with the boundaries that they need because they don't

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Speaker 2: have the skill set.

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Speaker 1: So a couple of important things here. Number one, just

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Speaker 1: to clarify, we are not talking about teenagers. We're talking

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Speaker 1: about people overall. Two million people around the world overall,

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Speaker 1: and we are seeing an increase in well being. I've

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Speaker 1: watched you in the last month and a half adopt

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Speaker 1: Snapchat as your new favorite app, and I've literally seen

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Speaker 1: a well being boost. I've seen the joy and delight

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Speaker 1: that you've had as you've had filters going through your

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Speaker 1: life and through your screen, and just how much fun

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Speaker 1: it's been for you. I've sworn off social media, but

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Speaker 1: recently I've been playing around with read it a little

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Speaker 1: bit and I'm really enjoying it. It's delightful, but it's

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Speaker 1: got to be balanced. Overall. Andy Shipbulski's research shows that

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Speaker 1: if we can get the balance right, and we need

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Speaker 1: to be mindful that there are very real risks and concerns.

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Speaker 1: There are dangerous things out there. We're dealing with bullying,

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Speaker 1: we're dealing with races, and we're dealing with sexist and

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Speaker 1: we're dealing with homophobia. We're dealing with all of the

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Speaker 1: isms that you can think of. They're all all over

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Speaker 1: the Internet. We've got to make sure that we're safe.

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Speaker 1: But if we can do that, it seems that overall,

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Speaker 1: the vast majority of people find their lives and their

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Speaker 1: wellbeing are improved by having access to screens and the Internet.

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Speaker 1: We will link to the paper. I mean, it's a

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Speaker 1: fascinating paper. It's heavy, it's deep, there's a lot there.

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Speaker 1: It's called a Multiverse Analysis, A Multiverse Analysis of the

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Speaker 1: associations between Internet use and well being. It was published

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Speaker 1: in Technology, Mind and Behavior and written up in the

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Speaker 1: journal Nature as well by Matti Vuare and Andrew K. Shibalski,

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Speaker 1: studying number.

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Speaker 2: Two, the Power of Touch. I like this one.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this one's far less controversial.

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Speaker 2: I just like a good massage, and now I have

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Speaker 2: even more reason.

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Speaker 1: Well, this is a brand new report published recently in

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Speaker 1: Nature Human Behavior. Julian Packiser and colleagues have made a

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Speaker 1: major attempt to understand what's really going on with physical

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Speaker 1: and mental health and the benefits of touch. Two hundred

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Speaker 1: and seventeen touch studies were analyzed in what we call

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Speaker 1: a meta analysis, a systematic review of all the research

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Speaker 1: that's out there, a total of almost thirteen thousand people

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Speaker 1: looking at the impact of touch on both babies and

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Speaker 1: also adults. And the research is found essentially that there

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Speaker 1: is a really substantial impact on well being, both physical

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Speaker 1: and mental wellbeing when we get touched.

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Speaker 2: About a month ago, I attended the Resilient Kids conference

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Speaker 2: with You Yes, and we got to see Karen Young

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Speaker 2: from Hey Sigmund share her talk all about anxiety and

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Speaker 2: big feelings, and she actually talks about this, and she

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Speaker 2: just shared that little part in the middle of your back,

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Speaker 2: top of your back, if you just rub that, it

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Speaker 2: actually activates the vagus.

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Speaker 1: Nerve right and the vegas have known as the wandering nerve.

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Speaker 1: It goes right through the body from the brainstem right

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Speaker 1: through all of your organs down to just below your

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Speaker 1: waist or hips. And it is what we need so

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Speaker 1: that when that activated, our parasympathetic nervous system is activated,

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Speaker 1: which means that we're in rest into jest mode rather

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Speaker 1: than vital flight mode.

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Speaker 2: What's interesting to me about that is as a parent, Well,

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Speaker 2: it's interesting.

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Speaker 1: The whole thing's interesting.

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Speaker 2: No, But as a parent, do you instinctively go there

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Speaker 2: like that's where I would pack the babies to sleep, yeah,

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Speaker 2: or when they ask for a BackRub, that's where you

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Speaker 2: go to.

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Speaker 1: That's why when it's so intuitive. Whenever I hug you,

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Speaker 1: that's what I do. I just keep on rubbing that.

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Speaker 2: Oh is that right?

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Speaker 1: Okay, let's talk about the science for a second now

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Speaker 1: that you've shared that. And by the way, Karen Young

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Speaker 1: gives great hugs.

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Speaker 2: Well, I got the best time from guarantee.

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Speaker 1: That's what I was saying. It was with really one

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Speaker 1: of the highlights of your day. Here's what the research

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Speaker 1: has found. For newborns. They basically found medium sized effects

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Speaker 1: on well being. They found that physical touch lowers stress

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Speaker 1: hormone levels specifically cortisolt drops, liver enzymes, as well as respiration,

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Speaker 1: temperature regulation, and weight gain. Touch interventions had medium to

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Speaker 1: large effects on all of those areas in a positive direction,

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Speaker 1: so so good, and for adults, touch improvedarious measures of

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Speaker 1: both physical and mental well being, but it was especially

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Speaker 1: effective with adults at reducing pain and also reducing feelings

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Speaker 1: of depression and anxiety.

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Speaker 2: So does it matter who does the touching not.

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Speaker 1: If you're an adult. In fact, research has even found

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Speaker 1: that the robotic massage tools that you can use they

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Speaker 1: can be just as beneficial for adults as having human

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Speaker 1: to human touch. Although although the benefits of being touched

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Speaker 1: by another person were bigger for mental.

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Speaker 2: Health, did they say this is a daily thing, you

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Speaker 2: really like this?

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Speaker 1: You really like this? Study? Babies enjoy bigger benefits when

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Speaker 1: it comes from a parent, usually the mum in these

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Speaker 1: studies than for a health professional. They just like to

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Speaker 1: be touched by the person that they know and love,

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Speaker 1: So who administers the touch for babies it does matter

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Speaker 1: a little bit more, for adults a little bit less,

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Speaker 1: but there's benefits absolutely no matter what. So will link

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Speaker 1: to that study in the show notes as well as

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Speaker 1: a beautiful study, and for those of you who are

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Speaker 1: scientifically inclined, you can get a whole lot more about

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Speaker 1: the best places to be touched, the best contexts in

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Speaker 1: which to be touched, and how it affects males and

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Speaker 1: females differently and different age troups generally as well. It's

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Speaker 1: just a really delightful study.

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Speaker 2: Well, studying number three is all about the fact that

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Speaker 2: anger is bad for our health and more ways than one. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So, years and years ago I read a book called

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Speaker 1: Anger Kills. It was by I think I think it

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Speaker 1: was his name was Redford Williams. I may have that wrong,

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Speaker 1: but a guy called Williams, and he wrote this book

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Speaker 1: Anger Kills. New research is supporting what Williams wrote all

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Speaker 1: those years ago, and it's showing really clearly that anger

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Speaker 1: is affecting our brains, our heart, and our gastro intestinal

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Speaker 1: system in really significant ways. Basically, stress hormones are killing us.

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Speaker 1: High levels of stress hormones damaged nerve cells in our brain,

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Speaker 1: They create bloating, constipation, stomach pain, and other symptoms in

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Speaker 1: our gut and in our gastro intestinal system. And then

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Speaker 1: there's the impact that it has on our hearts. And

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Speaker 1: researchers examined the impact of three different emotions on the heart, anger, anxiety,

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Speaker 1: and sadness. They got participants to either do a task

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Speaker 1: that made them angry, or a task that made them anxious,

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Speaker 1: or one that was designed to induce sadness. And then

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Speaker 1: they simply tested the functioning of the blood vessels in

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Speaker 1: each participant, using a blood pressure CUF to squeeze and

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Speaker 1: release the blood flow in the arm. And the people

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Speaker 1: in the angry group had worse blood flow than those

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Speaker 1: in the others. Their blood vs.

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Speaker 2: Well your whole body tenses.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, their blood vessels didn't dilate as much. Yeah, So

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Speaker 1: over time, if you're getting these chronic insults to your

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Speaker 1: arteries because you get angry a lot, that leaves you

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Speaker 1: a greater risk of heart disease. So the research really

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Speaker 1: points strongly in the direction that anger is literally killing us.

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Speaker 2: Well, I was just thinking that our previous study all

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Speaker 2: about the power of touch was going to be helpful here.

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Speaker 1: But I know you need to touch.

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Speaker 2: When our kids are angry, the last thing they want

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Speaker 2: is somebody to touch them and especially give them a BackRub.

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Speaker 2: So what are their solutions, like, how can we help

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Speaker 2: to just lower those levels of anger? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: I think I think really we need to be self

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Speaker 1: aware enough to recognize if we're getting too angry too

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Speaker 1: often or just too much, recognize that there's this connection here.

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Speaker 1: If there is a prolonged negative emotion it's really bad

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Speaker 1: for your health. So it's normal to get angry, but

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Speaker 1: we've got to be able to repair it and fix

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Speaker 1: things up fairly quickly. We know that getting off sleep

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Speaker 1: and getting up to exercise is going to be helpful.

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Speaker 1: But the last thing that I think really matters is

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Speaker 1: and this is something that you and I have talked

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Speaker 1: about many times on the podcast, slow Down your Reactions.

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Speaker 1: Stephen Covey talked about that space between the stimulus and

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Speaker 1: the response, and if we can just pause and slow

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Speaker 1: things down and choose our reactions more carefully, we're less

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Speaker 1: likely to get angry and we're going to do more

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Speaker 1: for our mental health. So that is studying number three.

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Speaker 1: We will link to all of those studies in our

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Speaker 1: show notes. Thanks for listening. The Happy Families podcast is

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Speaker 1: produced by Justin Roland from Bridge Media. Craig Bruce is

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Speaker 1: our executive producer. If you would like more information about

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Speaker 1: making your family happier, we'd love for you to join

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Speaker 1: us at Happy Families dot com dot a uh