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Speaker 1: Jonesy and Amanda in the morning, Satham, you know what,

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Speaker 1: our next guest would be really annoying if we didn't

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Speaker 1: like him so much. He's such an overachiever. This is

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Speaker 1: his list of accomplishments. A feature film and sitcom start producer, director,

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Speaker 1: a stand up comedian, a best selling children's offer. He

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Speaker 1: graces our screens on the Project most nights, but he's

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Speaker 1: gracing us right here, right now.

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Speaker 2: Peter Hellia, Hello, Hello.

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Speaker 3: Amanda hell Jones, Hello, Peter.

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Speaker 4: And I like you probably no, I do like you

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Speaker 4: very much.

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Speaker 3: I think we formed a bond. We have we have

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Speaker 3: We're close. We're close, like right now.

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Speaker 5: Obviously the listeners can't hear it, but we we are

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Speaker 5: giving ourselves that little heart signal that people give when

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Speaker 5: they make the little heart segal next to their chest,

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Speaker 5: training at each other.

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Speaker 2: My hands don't do that easily.

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Speaker 3: A man after he can start, I really have to

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Speaker 3: think about it.

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Speaker 5: I was dubbing my oldest son after the school for

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Speaker 5: camp yesterday, early than he usually goes, and I was

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Speaker 5: joking with him.

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Speaker 3: I said, how about you get out of the car.

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Speaker 5: I was saying, okay, you go to the bus and

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Speaker 5: then I'll get that just about you, as about you

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Speaker 5: jump on the bus, I'll jump out of my car

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Speaker 5: and you yet like Liam, and then I'll do the

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Speaker 5: heart signal to you and point at you. I said,

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Speaker 5: will that'd be cool, And I couldn't actually do I

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Speaker 5: realized I couldn't do the heart.

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Speaker 3: It was more like a It was more like a

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Speaker 3: pizza of bum that I was actually.

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Speaker 2: Doing during your week at camp.

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Speaker 3: And Liam was all for that.

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Speaker 5: It was all for it, he shouted at down pretty quickly.

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Speaker 5: He did suggest I'd do it with my for my

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Speaker 5: younger brother, his younger brother. Afterwards, he said he would

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Speaker 5: enjoy it.

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Speaker 2: Yes, are you an embarrassing father?

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Speaker 5: I don't think I am. But I like the joke

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Speaker 5: about those kinds of things, you know. I used to

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Speaker 5: do a wrap when they were a bit younger, called

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Speaker 5: making bacon and every they used to always have bacon

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Speaker 5: on weekends for breakfast, and I would always come in

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Speaker 5: and go, yeah, we're making bacon. I'm not facing who's

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Speaker 5: up for the teaking like? And they just at first,

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Speaker 5: like they grinned.

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Speaker 3: At first. It was the best I got.

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Speaker 5: But then it because I knew it kind of made

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Speaker 5: them a bit uncomfortable.

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Speaker 3: I just went for it.

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Speaker 5: And then and then eventually like the rap got longer,

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Speaker 5: and then I said, I would say, listen, the principal

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Speaker 5: got into contact and he wants me to wrap at

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Speaker 5: the assembly. You guys, are you guys up for that?

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Speaker 5: And the event was okay, it's gone too far. I

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Speaker 5: need to stop. And I thought, this is going to

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Speaker 5: be the last one. This is going to be the

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Speaker 5: last one. And I went out and I did the

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Speaker 5: rap and they're like that, they're not even looking at

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Speaker 5: me anymore. And then but then my wife comes in

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Speaker 5: and she's never joined in. She starts coming in and

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Speaker 5: harmonizing with the rap, and they're like the look of

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Speaker 5: betrayal on their faces, like.

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Speaker 4: I'm not you so because they're so sensitive. My daughter,

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Speaker 4: when she was in high school, all I said to

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Speaker 4: a teacher was how you doing? And Raymony said, Dad,

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Speaker 4: just go just guys. I said, well, I can't greet

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Speaker 4: the teacher.

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Speaker 2: Just get out of here.

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Speaker 5: I into my shell a little bit, to be honest,

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Speaker 5: when their mates come over, because I think subconsciously I

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Speaker 5: am a bit embarrassed about embarrassing, you know, fearful of

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Speaker 5: embarrassing them. So I kind of like there are times

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Speaker 5: that their mates go over and I probably come off

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Speaker 5: as like quite standoffish, but I won't even go and

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Speaker 5: say hello because I'm just like, I don't want to.

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Speaker 3: I don't want to get in their way. It's my home.

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Speaker 3: My parents never felt like that. My dad would walk

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Speaker 3: around with his shoes with his test he is hanging out.

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Speaker 2: That rat was terrible.

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Speaker 1: You have a new stand up show called Loopy. What

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Speaker 1: are you looking at in Loopy?

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Speaker 3: Well, it's I do a show every two years.

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Speaker 5: That's my kind of thing because I feel like it

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Speaker 5: gives myself a chance to evolve a little bit.

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Speaker 3: It gives the world a.

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Speaker 5: Chance to change, and I can kind of I feel

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Speaker 5: like I can see it a bit clearer in my

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Speaker 5: own mind.

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Speaker 3: You know.

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Speaker 5: I'm usually trying to work things out. And what I've

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Speaker 5: noticed with this show when I've been.

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Speaker 3: Compile material is like, I feel like we're.

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Speaker 5: As confused as we've ever been, and in a way

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Speaker 5: is divided as we've ever been. And there's I was

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Speaker 5: on a train recently and a guy has said to

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Speaker 5: me out of the blue. He just said to me,

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Speaker 5: everything you believe is true and the rest is bullshit.

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Speaker 5: And I was like, cool, He obviously knows who I am,

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Speaker 5: He's watched the project, he knows my views. But then

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Speaker 5: he said and vice versa, and that twisted my little

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Speaker 5: mind into a pretzel. And I wasn't sure if this

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Speaker 5: guy was a weirdo or a genius or maybe a.

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Speaker 3: Bit of both.

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Speaker 5: So I thought a lot about that, because we are

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Speaker 5: getting really divided, like there's this outrage culture. Nobody wants

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Speaker 5: to admit that they're wrong, which I think like every

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Speaker 5: time we discuss anything of note, it becomes competitive. I

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Speaker 5: think as OSSI as we love our sport, and we've

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Speaker 5: brought sport into the idea of arguing, and it's a

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Speaker 5: really powerful thing to, I think, to admit that you

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Speaker 5: could be wrong.

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Speaker 3: I mean I've done. I was wrong about cats.

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Speaker 5: I was wrong about not not the movie, absolutely, but

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Speaker 5: I was wrong about mushrooms, you know.

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Speaker 4: And what were you wrong about mushrooms about?

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Speaker 3: I hated mushrooms. I hated mushrooms. I thought, O, Eric,

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Speaker 3: and I thought, what do they need their own bag?

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Speaker 3: You know? What's that about? You know? I hated cats.

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Speaker 3: Now I have a cat. I love my cat, you know.

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Speaker 5: And I remember being on a date in my early

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Speaker 5: twenties and I was with a girl that I quite liked,

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Speaker 5: and I think she quite liked me, and we kind

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Speaker 5: of started speaking about maybe traveling, you know, maybe even

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Speaker 5: going on a trip overseas together. And she was like

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Speaker 5: high cultured, you know, she was into like a fancy

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Speaker 5: kind of art, you know, not my dick jokes.

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Speaker 3: So I tried to impress her and I.

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Speaker 5: Said, yeah, I've always wanted to go to Italy and

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Speaker 5: I've always wanted to go see Michelangelo's sixteenth Chaplin. And

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Speaker 5: this is the mid nineteen nineties. I was a straight

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Speaker 5: white man. I had no reason to believe I was wrong.

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Speaker 5: And she said to me very kindly, she said, yeah,

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Speaker 5: I think. Yeah, I've always wanted to go to the Steen.

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Speaker 3: Chapel chapel, yeah, not the sixteenth one.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, And I said, no, I'm pretty sure it's the

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Speaker 5: sixteenth Chapel.

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Speaker 3: And then she was so good about it. She said,

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Speaker 3: do you want to visit any of these other fifteen channels?

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Speaker 4: Did you round first base?

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Speaker 3: No?

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Speaker 5: No, I excuse myself. I pretended to go to the

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Speaker 5: bathroom and I left from what you do now?

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Speaker 2: Is she she'd google it? She said, look at this,

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Speaker 2: she w idiot.

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Speaker 3: Yes, Well, exactly that.

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Speaker 5: This is pret google. At least it wasn't on our phones.

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Speaker 5: You know, I had Snake on my phone that was

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Speaker 5: about it back then. And then this is outrage culture.

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Speaker 3: This is kind of, you know, weird.

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Speaker 5: I remember tweeting, you know, about Serena Williams winning the

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Speaker 5: estray O but when she was pregnant, and I said,

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Speaker 5: you know, and she still had less mood swings than

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Speaker 5: Nick Kurios. And I got like, and I got lots

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Speaker 5: of love and lots of mainly women, to be honest,

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Speaker 5: with lots of retweets.

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Speaker 3: I thought, lots of likes. And there was one person.

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Speaker 5: One person got offended and it was a It was

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Speaker 5: a man and and you know, I didn't respond to him,

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Speaker 5: but judging by his profile, aric and single. And he said, ah, yes,

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Speaker 5: another male comedian making another sexist joke. And I thought, well,

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Speaker 5: I I I didn't really think about it. I had

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Speaker 5: to go and work my way through it. I was thinking,

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Speaker 5: am I being Is it offensive? And I thought, I'm

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Speaker 5: only really suggesting that women have mood swings when they

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Speaker 5: are pregnant. Yes, some women do. And I had to

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Speaker 5: think about my wife? Did my wife? And of course

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Speaker 5: she did my wife wake up in the middle of

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Speaker 5: the night once when she was pregnant, and she said, oh,

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Speaker 5: I've had a dream. I've had a dream.

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Speaker 3: And I said, what was a dream? Abat?

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Speaker 5: She said, well, I I was having my It was

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Speaker 5: that time of the month, you know. I tried to

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Speaker 5: keep it radio clear. It was that time of the month,

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Speaker 5: but instead of like what usually comes out, it was

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Speaker 5: maple syrup. And I couldn't find my my sanitary products

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Speaker 5: to contain the maple syrup.

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Speaker 3: And I said, it were well, because you didn't need

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Speaker 3: it your sanitary product. You needed waffles. And she I

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Speaker 3: was gonna.

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Speaker 5: Say she didn't laugh as much as I thought she would,

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Speaker 5: but she didn't say anything, and I thought she got

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Speaker 5: away with it. And then I woke up ten minutes

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Speaker 5: later after I went to sleep and my chest hair

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Speaker 5: was on fire.

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Speaker 3: I thought, yeah, I didn't. I didn't get away with that.

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Speaker 3: I didn't get away with it.

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Speaker 2: But you're right, it's the outrage culture. I think you've

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Speaker 2: got so much fodder.

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Speaker 4: You've got your you've got the material coming out the wazoo.

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Speaker 4: If you can say wazoo anymore. Peter, it's always great

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Speaker 4: to see you catch Peter Hellier in his stand up

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Speaker 4: show Loopy. Tickets available from ticketmaster dot com dot are you, Thank.

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Speaker 5: You Peter, fantastic and this weekend, Sam the wonderful Sam

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Speaker 5: Tawton is my support act.

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Speaker 2: This week is a fantastic your athletic support for the weekend.

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Speaker 3: Yes, you basically give me the rubb down. Nice go

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Speaker 3: and do the heart signal to.

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Speaker 2: Pete joined the and Amanda in the morning One

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Speaker 3: Fl