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Speaker 1: Good day guys. Yeah, you've tuned int the Will and

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Speaker 1: Woody podcast. Pleasure to have you on here. This is

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Speaker 1: the special edition that we're rolling out Woods of the

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Speaker 1: sit down that we had where I spoke to you

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Speaker 1: about what it's like to work with me as somebody

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Speaker 1: who has depression.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a pretty raw, unedited chat, Yes it is,

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Speaker 2: but I think it's something which is going to help

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Speaker 2: people listen to.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's right. We really hope that on OOKJ we

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Speaker 1: could inspire the people who aren't necessarily suffering, because they're

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Speaker 1: the ones that really make the difference. You're the guys

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Speaker 1: that initiate the conversation and you're the guys that are

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Speaker 1: going to help the most. So I hope, if anything

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Speaker 1: from this you get some inspo from the way that

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Speaker 1: Woods is with me and in terms of how he

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Speaker 1: absorbs a lot of stuff, but also how he constantly

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Speaker 1: checks in with me. And also just remember from this chat, Yes,

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Speaker 1: the makeshift things wonderful and it really helped. But I've

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Speaker 1: got really really good avenues of professional support. I've got

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Speaker 1: a psychologists I see regularly, and I've been at it

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Speaker 1: for a long time. So if you are in a

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Speaker 1: position where you feel like you're not right. Yes, continue

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Speaker 1: to have commons with your friends, but please go and

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Speaker 1: see a doctor, Go and see a psychologist, or call

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Speaker 1: Lifeline on thirteen eleven fourteen. They're always there for you,

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Speaker 1: and they do a wonderful job, and I promise they're

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Speaker 1: going to be able to help you out.

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Speaker 3: But otherwise, go some tissues.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I hope you guys get something out of it.

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Speaker 3: It was obviously pretty hard for us to.

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Speaker 1: Record, but I think it's an important message. So yeah, enjoy.

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Speaker 4: So this is the second time I've dragged you into

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Speaker 4: one of these conversations.

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Speaker 3: Ye, pleasure as always, So I wanted.

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Speaker 1: To thank you for coming in because of this session

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Speaker 1: is going to be largely focused on you. You didn't

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Speaker 1: tell me that, because today is are you Okayday? And

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Speaker 1: I've always said that I think the mental health crisis

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Speaker 1: can only be solved by the people who.

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Speaker 3: Aren't going through something.

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Speaker 1: I think to be with somebody who is suffering a

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Speaker 1: mental health condition is as bad as suffering at yourself.

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Speaker 1: I'm not in that position very often, but I know

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Speaker 1: that it sucks when you don't really know what's going on.

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Speaker 1: So that's why it's going to be about you, because

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Speaker 1: that's you're in a bit of a unique position because

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Speaker 1: you have to work with me intimately in circumstances which

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Speaker 1: other people wouldn't normally have to work with somebody who's

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Speaker 1: suffering a mental illness. So, for example, if I am

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Speaker 1: depressed and I rock up to work, I can't just

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Speaker 1: bury my head in work or like at the photocopier.

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Speaker 1: Not that I be at the photo copy, but I

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Speaker 1: have to front up and do the show, et cetera.

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Speaker 3: And it's hard for me, but it's also.

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Speaker 4: Very very hard for you, and I'm very grateful that

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Speaker 4: you that you do that. That's why I want to

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Speaker 4: focus on you, so that people that watch this or

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Speaker 4: see this can hopefully get some take on points as

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Speaker 4: to how they should be with other people who've got

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Speaker 4: mental mental illnesses or mental health conditions.

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Speaker 3: That's what I okay to all about.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, definitely focusing on the people that don't have it,

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Speaker 1: how you can help the people that do. The other

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Speaker 1: reason I want to focus on you is because you

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Speaker 1: are very much the archetypal blocky bloke, a bit of

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Speaker 1: a man's man, but you like to steer clear of emotions.

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Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, not your stereotypical man.

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Speaker 5: But one trait I do have a stereotypical macho man

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Speaker 5: is that I don't like talking.

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Speaker 3: About serious stuff.

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Speaker 5: I don't like addressing my emotions, So situations like this

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Speaker 5: do make me feel just a little bit uncomfortable.

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Speaker 1: So you do a really good job of navigating me

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Speaker 1: when I am in that sort of a zone.

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Speaker 3: Thank you. How do you go? How do you go

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Speaker 3: about it?

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Speaker 5: It's been a journey actually because I reckon Initially I

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Speaker 5: didn't get it, which we've talked about before, and that

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Speaker 5: was pretty shit when I didn't get it, because it

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Speaker 5: was just like you're seeing someone you love going through

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Speaker 5: saying really shit, and you just like naturally you just

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Speaker 5: want to like click your fingers and fix it. Yeah,

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Speaker 5: you just want to go like what can I do

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Speaker 5: to bring you back immediately? And then you sort of

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Speaker 5: feel a bit like you've let your friend down or

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Speaker 5: you love one down because you're not able to bring

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Speaker 5: them out of it, And you also can't help but

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Speaker 5: think sometimes like what have I done? Or why don't

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Speaker 5: Yeah you and I know I struggled with that early,

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Speaker 5: but then you struggle with not being able to put

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Speaker 5: me out of it. Yeah, By me being here, I

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Speaker 5: can pull you out, but it's not that simple, no,

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Speaker 5: And through conversations with you and just getting to know

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Speaker 5: it a bit more, I've come to realize that's not

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Speaker 5: what I try to do anymore. So I know that

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Speaker 5: if you are in a place where you're struggling, you're

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Speaker 5: having a bad days, it's not about what can I

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Speaker 5: do to get you out of that.

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Speaker 3: It's more it's.

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Speaker 5: More like sorry about.

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Speaker 3: It, to talk about you're doing a good job.

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Speaker 6: I thought I was doing a good job. I'm just

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Speaker 6: trying to show that it doesn't affect me anymore, but

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Speaker 6: it's absolutely killing it.

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Speaker 1: So and I think you made a really good point there,

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Speaker 1: which is there's a differ diference between trying to fix

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Speaker 1: something that somebody's going through with a mental illness versus

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Speaker 1: just being there for them.

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Speaker 5: And I don't think that'll ever be I think that's

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Speaker 5: a comfortable thing for me to watch a witness. But

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Speaker 5: we've talked about it's good to actually say like, hey,

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Speaker 5: are you feeling okay today?

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Speaker 3: And you've talked to me about that's good for you. Yep,

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Speaker 3: it's a good step.

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Speaker 1: It's good for me to notice it and go like Yep,

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Speaker 1: this is good, definitely going on.

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Speaker 5: I think from there. For me, it's just just I'm here. Yeah, great,

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Speaker 5: I'm here if you need me. I love you and

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Speaker 5: just support whatever you want to do.

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Speaker 3: And often for.

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Speaker 5: As you said before, for our work, it's pretty much

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Speaker 5: impossible because of our area of work. For you to

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Speaker 5: when the microphones turn on at four o'clock in the afternoon,

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Speaker 5: that's to try and sound like you're having a good

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Speaker 5: time or any good mood is pretty difficult.

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Speaker 4: I believe there was one day when I was feeling

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Speaker 4: very depressed, and I'm very big on trying to normalize conversations,

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Speaker 4: and I think I approached you doing a show.

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Speaker 3: Where I was where I was depressed. I'd been going

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Speaker 3: for three months.

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Speaker 4: And I said, I think I should just do the

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Speaker 4: show depressed and tell everyone depressed.

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Speaker 3: And be a glum on the airways.

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Speaker 4: Would have been the can you message, and you're like,

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Speaker 4: good idea, But.

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Speaker 3: Now might not be the time.

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Speaker 1: I have actually pushed the envelope a few times though,

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Speaker 1: which for me that's been quite foolish. Stephen Fry says

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Speaker 1: about mental illness that it's raining outside, the worst thing

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Speaker 1: you can do is go outside because it's actually raining,

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Speaker 1: so there's no point pretending that it's not. In the past,

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Speaker 1: I've got myself into to real issues before where it

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Speaker 1: has been raining outside, but I've gone like, nah, bugger.

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Speaker 1: I think that comes down to being really worried about

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Speaker 1: however the run's going to perceive me. When I do

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Speaker 1: go to work and I am depressed. How do you

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Speaker 1: look after yourself in those scenarios.

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Speaker 3: I try to, as early.

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Speaker 5: As possible make sure that I've got the mindset of

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Speaker 5: it's nothing you've done as in me, because to talk.

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Speaker 3: Really candidly when you are in.

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Speaker 5: A dark spot it can at times feel like I

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Speaker 5: think you're angry at that.

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Speaker 3: It's really it's quite abrasive.

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Speaker 5: And I know we've talked before. That's how you because

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Speaker 5: that's you've said to me before. It's like you're watching

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Speaker 5: yourself do it and you hate that you're doing it.

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Speaker 3: Well.

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Speaker 5: I try to see the depression as opposed to seeing Yeah,

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Speaker 5: I know that sounds a bit weird, but that does

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Speaker 5: help me.

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Speaker 4: I remember recently. You don't know I heard this, but

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Speaker 4: I'd always sly pissed off a rounch of people.

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Speaker 5: Sometimes it's funny you're able to take down a whole

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Speaker 5: room lines and it's like I.

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Speaker 1: Really set them off, and I was like walked out

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Speaker 1: and I could hear you in there, sort of saying

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Speaker 1: everyone that.

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Speaker 3: It wasn't.

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Speaker 4: It wasn't me, and you wanted everyone to just forgive

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Speaker 4: me for how I'd been and what I'd said. And

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Speaker 4: I know how many bosses you've talked off a ledge

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Speaker 4: because of how I've been, But thank you. That is fine,

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Speaker 4: And it's a really scary part I think of having

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Speaker 4: a mental illness is, Yeah, the way you treat people

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Speaker 4: when you like that, and you know, it's like it's

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Speaker 4: really key that you find people like you. It takes

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Speaker 4: real strength to stay with people when they're like that.

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Speaker 4: And I see it with my girlfriend Sam as well,

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Speaker 4: Like I'm home and I talk about the fact that

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Speaker 4: I felt, like, you know, thinking about killing myself that

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Speaker 4: day or whatever it is, and the fact that I've

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Speaker 4: got people around me like you that don't react and

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Speaker 4: just like absorb it.

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Speaker 3: So I want to say things It's because I love you.

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Speaker 5: I want to tell you that over and over again.

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Speaker 3: It is because I love you. Yeah, I love you too.

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Speaker 5: Anyone else who is going through that, just if they

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Speaker 5: can somehow. And I don't know how hard this must

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Speaker 5: be when you are in the throes of it, but

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Speaker 5: just to try and remind themselves of how much people

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Speaker 5: do like them.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's part of you. It is you. Yeah, love

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Speaker 3: every single part of you.

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Speaker 5: All the things you say. I hate hearing the most.

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Speaker 5: Whenever you have the feeling that you are burden.

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Speaker 3: That's it.

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Speaker 1: What would you say to people who are on the

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Speaker 1: outside who are scared of having an awkward conversation with

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Speaker 1: somebody who's got a mental illness.

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Speaker 5: So it's not about trying to fix it. It's about

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Speaker 5: take a babystip and just like start with a message,

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Speaker 5: Hey here you're.

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Speaker 4: Going Yeah, and like often you know, before our show,

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Speaker 4: I know, if I'm not doing very well, I will

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Speaker 4: go to the kitchen and I'll.

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Speaker 3: Make a cup of tea. You did it yesterday.

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Speaker 4: I've got to be two hours of the happiest person

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Speaker 4: on the planet and I'm crying out the windows, really

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Speaker 4: calling the curtain down of our show.

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Speaker 5: If you hear a sniffle in the top of air

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Speaker 5: of our shows, will's just been crying.

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Speaker 4: You will come in and you'll say, mate, how are

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Speaker 4: you going? I know that must be hard as well.

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Speaker 4: But it's great, It's really helpful, and it just starts

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Speaker 4: just chipping away it the diamond of resentment that you

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Speaker 4: know is the core of feeling depressed.

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Speaker 3: I've got more bad luck.

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Speaker 4: And this again for people out there who are unsure

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Speaker 4: about talking to someone about their mental health and mental illness.

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Speaker 4: Do you think that it's actually been beneficial towards both

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Speaker 4: our friendship and our show.

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Speaker 3: One hundred percent.

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Speaker 5: It took it to a whole new level when we

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Speaker 5: were able to be completely vulnerable and open with each other.

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Speaker 4: What would your advice be to other men who are

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Speaker 4: as you used to pay in terms of really struggling

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Speaker 4: to communicate.

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Speaker 5: Just don't be the person that regrets not doing something

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Speaker 5: really simple. Whenever I think about the days when I

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Speaker 5: say I hadn't messaged you, it dawns on me pretty

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Speaker 5: hard that there's obviously an ending there, which is a

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Speaker 5: very sad ending. And I think it's good for people

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Speaker 5: to confront that that that is actually a possibility and

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Speaker 5: just know that you never you never have the conversation

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Speaker 5: and regret having the conversation. You will never ever do that.

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Speaker 3: And if you just front up and you.

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Speaker 5: Just have it, then you're going to go a long

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Speaker 5: way and reducing people thinking that the way out the

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Speaker 5: best way to go Again.

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Speaker 1: I want to say thank you for that. I wouldn't

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Speaker 1: be able to rock up and do what I do if.

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Speaker 4: I didn't have you so attentive to that and so

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Speaker 4: willing to give. I was listening to a Counting Crows

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Speaker 4: song and the line in the song that he says

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Speaker 4: is how am I going to keep myself away from me?

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Speaker 4: I just want to say that often it's because of you,

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Speaker 4: you keep you away from me.

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Speaker 3: I'm really lucky.

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Speaker 5: I'm lucky.

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Speaker 3: Thanks much, I'm lucky.

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Speaker 6: Let me do.

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Speaker 3: Bloody hell. I told you to be hot. I didn't

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Speaker 3: know you'd ever heard me that day. Imagine if when

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Speaker 3: you walk you turned around. I've been saying it for weeks.

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Speaker 3: Bring in aid. We need the replacement.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, So you've made it to the end.

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Speaker 1: I hope you guys got something out of that. As

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Speaker 1: I've said before, I think the great paradox of this

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Speaker 1: mental health issue is that the only way out is

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Speaker 1: through talking. And I know is somebody who gets to

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Speaker 1: press that. He's often the hardest thing. So please take

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Speaker 1: him inspo from that and the way that Woods is

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Speaker 1: so often with me in terms of coercing me to

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Speaker 1: talk and checking in. And I hope you guys can

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Speaker 1: all do that with each other.

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Speaker 2: Make a small step right now and pick up your phone. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and just write a message. And it doesn't you have

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Speaker 2: to craft an intense bit. Just say hey, hey, guan, yep,

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Speaker 2: I haven't seen you for a while. Don to catch

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Speaker 2: up this weekend.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 7: It can be so simple like that. And I know

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Speaker 7: you've told me directly. Yeah. How much that helps you

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Speaker 7: even if you don't reply straight away.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, No, it's a great point.

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Speaker 2: Knowing that someone's there can seriously do a lot of

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Speaker 2: good for that person.

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Speaker 3: That's right.

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Speaker 1: It's like a bit of sunlight breaking through the clouds. Guys,

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Speaker 1: So reach out to your friends have an impact on them.

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Speaker 1: You can do it just with a conversation. I've got

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Speaker 1: to stress though, As I said at the start of

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Speaker 1: all this, I get really good professional help for depression.

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Speaker 1: If you're not getting professional help and you're feeling unsure,

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Speaker 1: please do so. Go and see a doctor or call

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Speaker 1: Lifeline thirteen eleven fourteen. They're always there to answer a

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Speaker 1: call and they'll be able to talk you through anything.

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Speaker 1: Even if you're just slightly feeling it. That's the right

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Speaker 1: decision to make. So please keep having the convos, but

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Speaker 1: make sure you're getting the right help for yourself. We're

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Speaker 1: going to get out of here, Well, you're going to

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Speaker 1: get out of here because the podcast.

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Speaker 7: Is we're all going to get out.

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Speaker 1: We're all going to get out.

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Speaker 7: If you stay here, they'll just be say.

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Speaker 3: Well, you might roll into the next shit.

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Speaker 1: Hot podcast from the boys.

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Speaker 7: Oh look out, yesterday's show WHOA, that'll be.

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Speaker 3: Later. Thanks for listening.