WEBVTT - ASK UNCUT - Where the foreplay at? 0:00:00.880 --> 0:00:05.280 Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout 0:00:05.320 --> 0:00:09.080 Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We 0:00:09.160 --> 0:00:11.920 pay our respect to their elders past and present and 0:00:12.039 --> 0:00:15.360 extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait islander 0:00:15.360 --> 0:00:16.120 peoples today. 0:00:16.320 --> 0:00:19.560 This episode is recorded on Gaddigal Land of the Aurora Nation. 0:00:39.080 --> 0:00:42.519 Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. 0:00:42.560 --> 0:00:44.040 I'm Laura and I'm Brittany. 0:00:44.320 --> 0:00:48.080 And Brittany, you have something that you're gonna tell us 0:00:48.159 --> 0:00:52.120 because on last or of Tuesday's episode I said it's 0:00:52.159 --> 0:00:53.599 time for some dating updates. 0:00:54.160 --> 0:00:58.320 Yeah, it is a funny little update. Actually it's not. 0:00:58.560 --> 0:01:01.320 I'm not going to go hard, but I is. How 0:01:01.480 --> 0:01:05.480 is the dating life currently hollow? The dating traps? 0:01:06.160 --> 0:01:09.800 It's still very very slow. I'm still just dipping my 0:01:10.080 --> 0:01:10.959 toes in the water. 0:01:11.240 --> 0:01:13.360 How many dates has one been on. 0:01:13.959 --> 0:01:15.800 With one person? Or different people? Oh? 0:01:15.920 --> 0:01:18.760 Both, look at me. 0:01:18.800 --> 0:01:19.880 I'm acting like I'm counting. 0:01:19.920 --> 0:01:24.320 It's too okay? How many dates? 0:01:24.360 --> 0:01:24.400 With? 0:01:24.640 --> 0:01:25.199 Said? Too? 0:01:25.680 --> 0:01:27.560 So? I think I told you a story. Okay, I've 0:01:27.560 --> 0:01:30.840 got two updates. I told you a story a little 0:01:30.840 --> 0:01:33.000 while ago about how produced a kish and I had 0:01:33.040 --> 0:01:35.200 matched with the same person online, and then we went 0:01:35.240 --> 0:01:38.600 out to the pub and we ran into that person. 0:01:38.640 --> 0:01:40.440 We have this really awkward moment. I said that a 0:01:40.480 --> 0:01:42.600 few weeks ago. But you never actually went on a 0:01:42.640 --> 0:01:44.080 date with his guy in real life. It was it 0:01:44.120 --> 0:01:45.600 was someone you match, you talked to a little bit, 0:01:45.600 --> 0:01:46.280 and then he. 0:01:46.200 --> 0:01:49.720 We both only met him on a dating app, but 0:01:49.800 --> 0:01:51.800 we didn't know we were both we would never do that, like, 0:01:51.800 --> 0:01:53.480 we're not going to play games. But then when we 0:01:53.560 --> 0:01:55.680 discovered we'd both talked to him, we never spoke to 0:01:55.720 --> 0:01:57.720 him again. But that was because he he sort of 0:01:57.760 --> 0:01:58.520 just like disappeared. 0:01:58.520 --> 0:02:00.920 So we disappeared into the net of the internet. 0:02:01.040 --> 0:02:03.720 Yeah, so we were like whatever, like like we're invested. 0:02:04.760 --> 0:02:08.360 We ran into him together at the pub, and I 0:02:08.360 --> 0:02:11.400 don't think he actually recognized us slash me. He might 0:02:11.400 --> 0:02:14.320 have recognized Keisha I produced Akisha, but not me. Anyway, 0:02:14.360 --> 0:02:15.800 we all had a bit of a laugh about it. 0:02:16.280 --> 0:02:20.560 He then all of his friends must have told him 0:02:20.600 --> 0:02:23.440 what happened, and then he went and found me on Instagram. 0:02:23.680 --> 0:02:26.520 Oh there was more. Yes, So he came and found 0:02:26.560 --> 0:02:29.600 me on Instagram and was like, hey, we've never spoken 0:02:29.639 --> 0:02:30.960 on Instagram. He's like, just want to let you know 0:02:31.000 --> 0:02:32.359 I didn't ghost you. 0:02:32.360 --> 0:02:34.400 You know when someone's really putting in the effort is 0:02:34.400 --> 0:02:36.400 when they change platforms, when they take it from the 0:02:36.480 --> 0:02:38.880 dating apps and they go into the Instagram, like find 0:02:38.960 --> 0:02:41.079 you on LinkedIn, send. 0:02:40.840 --> 0:02:42.840 A home in Pigeon. He's like, I want to I 0:02:42.880 --> 0:02:43.919 just want to let you know I didn't ghost you. 0:02:44.040 --> 0:02:45.839 And I wrote back and I was like, that's true. 0:02:45.919 --> 0:02:48.320 He actually did. No, I didn't. I said no. That's 0:02:48.400 --> 0:02:51.520 that's literally the definition of ghosting. We were talking and 0:02:51.560 --> 0:02:53.560 then she disappeared, and he's like, oh, well, I didn't 0:02:53.560 --> 0:02:55.760 mean it. Can I apologize? Can I make it up 0:02:55.760 --> 0:02:56.800 to you? Is it? Though? 0:02:57.040 --> 0:02:59.080 Can you actually go someone who you've never met in 0:02:59.080 --> 0:03:00.359 real life? I don't think you care? 0:03:00.520 --> 0:03:03.680 I care? No, Yeah, because if you imagine if you're 0:03:03.680 --> 0:03:05.920 talking to someone. I'm not saying this was asked as 0:03:05.919 --> 0:03:08.680 an example. Imagine if you're talking to someone non stop 0:03:08.960 --> 0:03:13.120 for like ten messages a day, for three weeks, four weeks, 0:03:13.160 --> 0:03:14.720 five weeks, and then all of a sudden nothing, that's 0:03:14.760 --> 0:03:16.359 a ghosting. You don't have to have met them, they're 0:03:16.400 --> 0:03:18.200 still they were there and then they're not. 0:03:19.040 --> 0:03:21.360 But I kind of feel like you can really only 0:03:21.360 --> 0:03:23.680 go someone once they've been a little bit of investment, 0:03:23.760 --> 0:03:24.000 i e. 0:03:24.280 --> 0:03:25.320 Once he's an investment. 0:03:25.400 --> 0:03:28.960 I don't think that who the fuck could text someone 0:03:29.000 --> 0:03:31.480 for five weeks without actually meeting them in real life 0:03:31.560 --> 0:03:34.720 unless he people. Unless when you were on dating apps 0:03:34.760 --> 0:03:38.000 you've set your profile to there are zero barriers, like 0:03:38.040 --> 0:03:39.560 as in one hundred kilometer radius. 0:03:39.600 --> 0:03:41.240 Do you know what the listeners are thinking right now? 0:03:41.320 --> 0:03:43.280 They're like, oh, bless Laura's soul. She's been out of 0:03:43.280 --> 0:03:45.600 the dating game for a while. You can one hundred 0:03:45.640 --> 0:03:49.000 percent be invested without meeting, yes, And I can be 0:03:49.120 --> 0:03:50.240 ghosted without. 0:03:50.040 --> 0:03:52.840 Meeting within a week, two weeks, maybe three weeks max 0:03:52.840 --> 0:03:55.040 I would meet someone. I have such a short plan, 0:03:55.320 --> 0:03:57.600 but I have a short attention span. I couldn't date 0:03:57.640 --> 0:04:00.240 someone online texting for five weeks. I'd be like, fuck, 0:04:00.280 --> 0:04:02.440 I'm so bored of this. Let's figure this out in 0:04:02.480 --> 0:04:04.560 real life see if we are compatible. 0:04:05.080 --> 0:04:07.040 But also think about the last couple of years in 0:04:07.120 --> 0:04:09.520 COVID and all the lock downs. So I feel like 0:04:09.520 --> 0:04:12.080 like blessed is the life that Laura has a beautiful 0:04:12.120 --> 0:04:14.760 relationship with children. All last single people out here are 0:04:14.760 --> 0:04:15.200 like Laura. 0:04:15.280 --> 0:04:17.600 You do not remember what the dating was like. I 0:04:17.640 --> 0:04:19.680 also blacked out what the pandemic was like as well. 0:04:20.120 --> 0:04:20.960 He did that happen? 0:04:21.279 --> 0:04:22.000 What are you talking about? 0:04:22.040 --> 0:04:24.440 But that wasn't even my update. I also told you 0:04:24.440 --> 0:04:25.920 guys another story recently. 0:04:25.960 --> 0:04:26.919 Wait wait, wait, don't know. 0:04:27.000 --> 0:04:28.760 So he said into your DMS and said I didn't 0:04:28.760 --> 0:04:30.640 gost you and you said you did and he said okay, 0:04:30.680 --> 0:04:31.400 and then what happened? 0:04:31.440 --> 0:04:32.719 Oh, so he wants to take me on a date. 0:04:33.200 --> 0:04:36.520 That's where's count We haven't yet. I've been actually too busy. 0:04:36.600 --> 0:04:38.719 And then I got COVID and implouenza. Everyone's hospitals, So 0:04:38.720 --> 0:04:40.280 I was like, wait, will you go on a date? 0:04:40.320 --> 0:04:42.839 We said, man, I think I probably should maybe like 0:04:42.880 --> 0:04:44.400 a coffee if he's going to put the effort in. 0:04:44.440 --> 0:04:45.599 But he's got to put the effort in. 0:04:45.760 --> 0:04:47.560 Do you have to have the conversation with produce a 0:04:47.640 --> 0:04:50.240 key shirt that you're both that he chose you? 0:04:50.240 --> 0:04:52.320 No, because then she started talking to his other friend. 0:04:54.720 --> 0:04:57.960 That's not even the update. The update was. I just said, 0:04:57.960 --> 0:05:00.479 I've actually only gone on two dates this year. Isn't 0:05:00.520 --> 0:05:02.560 that a sad thing for me? But I'm only just 0:05:02.600 --> 0:05:04.640 getting back out there. I've been on two days one 0:05:04.640 --> 0:05:06.719 of them I told you guys about recently where I 0:05:06.760 --> 0:05:10.159 said when we actually met, it wasn't really the person 0:05:10.200 --> 0:05:12.440 that I thought. It was like a semi catfish without catfish. 0:05:12.440 --> 0:05:16.400 It was that person, but maybe some older photos, filters, 0:05:16.680 --> 0:05:18.920 a few filters it's thrown in there, yeah, from ten 0:05:19.000 --> 0:05:23.359 years ago, a few filters from nineteen ninety seven, like 0:05:23.440 --> 0:05:26.599 the vintage film. It he tried to make it vintage. 0:05:26.600 --> 0:05:26.880 It wasn't. 0:05:26.920 --> 0:05:28.039 It was actually just vintage. 0:05:28.080 --> 0:05:29.800 It was. It was just an antique. 0:05:31.120 --> 0:05:34.279 It was from plenty of fish. So we had that 0:05:34.360 --> 0:05:37.839 date right and we were talking. You know. There were 0:05:37.880 --> 0:05:39.760 a few texts after it because it was really nice, 0:05:39.800 --> 0:05:42.120 like there was nothing wrong with this person, Like I 0:05:42.120 --> 0:05:43.840 want to make that clear. It just wasn't. The vibe 0:05:43.880 --> 0:05:45.880 just wasn't there. It wasn't for me. But there were 0:05:45.880 --> 0:05:48.520 a few texts after and then I just when the 0:05:48.520 --> 0:05:51.680 opportunity came for me to not respond, I didn't so 0:05:51.800 --> 0:05:53.919 like I was being nice enough. But when the texts 0:05:54.080 --> 0:05:57.440 died down and it wasn't a question anymore, you ghosted him, Well, 0:05:58.080 --> 0:05:59.760 he hasn't. He didn't write back to me either. I 0:06:00.080 --> 0:06:02.080 guess it was just sort of fading or he picked 0:06:02.160 --> 0:06:03.520 up on it, so I didn't go. So we we 0:06:03.520 --> 0:06:05.839 were back and forth until you know, a conversation dies, 0:06:05.880 --> 0:06:07.000 it just never picked back up. 0:06:07.080 --> 0:06:08.719 Yeah, it was. It's a slow fade. 0:06:08.880 --> 0:06:10.360 Yeah. So then I went on the date with the 0:06:10.400 --> 0:06:12.479 second person I've been on a date with, and we 0:06:12.520 --> 0:06:15.120 were again this is what I do, walking coffee date, 0:06:15.279 --> 0:06:18.840 you know, two birds one stone on a walking coffee date. 0:06:19.320 --> 0:06:20.880 Was standing out in the front of his coffee shop 0:06:20.880 --> 0:06:23.080 and there is a window in the coffee store. This 0:06:23.160 --> 0:06:27.039 is at my local, and I'm standing there with this person, 0:06:27.320 --> 0:06:29.880 lots of flirting, lots of whatever. And then I look 0:06:30.120 --> 0:06:34.760 up to my right and one point five meters away 0:06:34.880 --> 0:06:37.960 is the first guy, the catfish date guy that I 0:06:38.000 --> 0:06:39.800 stopped talking to, and he's standing there staring at me, 0:06:39.839 --> 0:06:41.039 and I stared at him, and then we had this. 0:06:41.520 --> 0:06:44.440 I pretended I didn't recognize him because I didn't what 0:06:44.480 --> 0:06:46.880 are you doing that situation? And I looked on my 0:06:46.920 --> 0:06:48.600 face and I looked away, and the guy was on 0:06:48.640 --> 0:06:50.360 a date with was like, is E anything all right? 0:06:50.360 --> 0:06:51.839 Because I must have just had them like I can't 0:06:51.880 --> 0:06:53.240 die have a poker face, and I just told him 0:06:53.240 --> 0:06:54.360 I was like, I went on a date with that guy. 0:06:54.400 --> 0:06:54.560 And I. 0:06:56.560 --> 0:06:58.400 Goes to and he was like, oh, this is awkward, 0:06:58.400 --> 0:07:00.400 and I was like, should we go to knock coffee shop? 0:07:00.760 --> 0:07:02.720 And that was it. So that's my dating update. That's 0:07:02.760 --> 0:07:05.920 just like nothing, nothing can ever be smooth. Two dates 0:07:06.000 --> 0:07:07.760 and then they collide. My world's collide. That's all I've 0:07:07.800 --> 0:07:10.080 done is two dates and I had an implosion. 0:07:10.600 --> 0:07:14.520 Two dates but more than one date with the second 0:07:14.560 --> 0:07:15.680 person or not? 0:07:15.840 --> 0:07:18.720 Oh hang on, you know, yes I do. 0:07:19.120 --> 0:07:20.720 Yeah, the second one I had went on a few 0:07:20.800 --> 0:07:21.800 dates with yeah, oh. 0:07:21.680 --> 0:07:23.640 Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, cool. Nice. 0:07:23.800 --> 0:07:25.600 It's good to be updated. I'm glad that all the 0:07:25.600 --> 0:07:27.320 people are now updated. I'm glad that we can all 0:07:27.360 --> 0:07:30.520 live vicariously through your dating life anytime you want to, 0:07:30.640 --> 0:07:32.080 you know, tell us the ins and outs. 0:07:32.240 --> 0:07:34.440 I've forgotten. And it's not that I've forgotten. 0:07:34.160 --> 0:07:36.560 What it's like to date. Trust me, that trauma is 0:07:36.640 --> 0:07:39.480 etched into my brain. I did some pretty terrible dating 0:07:39.520 --> 0:07:43.040 in my time. But I've forgotten about how the interactions 0:07:43.080 --> 0:07:44.920 go with online dating, Like what are the rules of 0:07:44.960 --> 0:07:46.960 engagement in terms. 0:07:46.760 --> 0:07:48.480 Of what just in terms of everything. 0:07:48.560 --> 0:07:51.080 I think, like when you start the conversation. 0:07:50.800 --> 0:07:52.080 Well, actually I have one. 0:07:52.400 --> 0:07:54.880 I think there's actually one question in here which we 0:07:54.960 --> 0:07:57.040 will get into, which I think kind of ties in 0:07:57.120 --> 0:08:00.920 a little bit, maybe loosely. Look it's a stretch, but 0:08:00.960 --> 0:08:03.120 we'll tie it in, all right. Anyways, for anyone who 0:08:03.200 --> 0:08:05.560 doesn't know what this episode is, you guys are not 0:08:05.640 --> 0:08:07.680 just about my dating I wish it was just. 0:08:07.600 --> 0:08:08.840 About Britt's dating life. 0:08:09.000 --> 0:08:11.240 You guys write in You're Deep, You're dark, You're burning 0:08:11.360 --> 0:08:14.920 questions and we do our absolute best to answer them, 0:08:14.960 --> 0:08:18.440 and we have chosen three, maybe four, depending on how 0:08:18.640 --> 0:08:22.800 much time. We have very good questions today. But before 0:08:22.800 --> 0:08:24.880 we get into answering the questions, there is something that 0:08:24.920 --> 0:08:27.800 I read in the news which is a very unrelatable 0:08:27.840 --> 0:08:30.200 news article that I came across. 0:08:29.840 --> 0:08:31.560 And that is brettany Hockley. 0:08:31.560 --> 0:08:34.800 Did you see that Ben Affleck's son had an accident? 0:08:35.120 --> 0:08:38.199 Okay, I didn't read this article. I scrolled past it 0:08:38.240 --> 0:08:40.000 and I saw it and I thought Ben Affleck had 0:08:40.000 --> 0:08:41.280 the car accident, and I just I was like, I 0:08:41.320 --> 0:08:43.560 couldn't care less if Ben Affleck accidentally dinged the cars, 0:08:43.559 --> 0:08:46.480 so I kept scrolling. It wasn't Ben, it was his son. 0:08:47.440 --> 0:08:51.560 Ben Affleck's ten year old son has run his three 0:08:51.640 --> 0:08:56.800 hundred and sixty one thousand dollar Lamborghini into a BMW. 0:08:58.280 --> 0:08:59.680 I have so many questions. 0:09:00.000 --> 0:09:02.520 Imagine you're a child not even okay, none of us 0:09:02.559 --> 0:09:04.560 can imagine this, because I'm pretty certain that not a 0:09:04.600 --> 0:09:07.720 single person who listens to this podcast owns the Lamborghini. Hey, lamee, 0:09:07.760 --> 0:09:10.040 So maybe someone does, do you think I don't think 0:09:10.040 --> 0:09:12.000 that we would be their cup of tea. I feel 0:09:12.000 --> 0:09:14.840 like there's they're probably listening to the Financial Review. But 0:09:15.360 --> 0:09:17.240 could you imagine your kid getting in your car and 0:09:17.280 --> 0:09:18.959 driving your car for a starter as a ten year 0:09:18.960 --> 0:09:21.960 old let alone. I mean, at least a Lamborghini would 0:09:21.960 --> 0:09:23.839 be easier for them to enter because it's so low lying. 0:09:24.400 --> 0:09:25.720 Yeah, you don't even have a step up into it. 0:09:25.720 --> 0:09:26.600 You roll on into it. 0:09:26.800 --> 0:09:29.280 The part of this story that's even wilder is that 0:09:29.360 --> 0:09:31.800 this wasn't their car. They didn't own this car. He 0:09:31.840 --> 0:09:33.679 got into the car at a dealership. 0:09:33.960 --> 0:09:37.640 Oh my god, Well they own it now and did 0:09:37.640 --> 0:09:38.080 it break? 0:09:38.080 --> 0:09:40.280 And you bought it? And did it at a dealership? 0:09:40.360 --> 0:09:41.360 I can't even They. 0:09:41.240 --> 0:09:43.240 Probably just had to buy two cars. They probably had 0:09:43.280 --> 0:09:45.200 to buy the car, the Lamborghini and the car that 0:09:45.240 --> 0:09:45.679 they just hear. 0:09:45.760 --> 0:09:48.160 Could you imagine or does it do you okay. Do 0:09:48.160 --> 0:09:49.760 you think that in that sort of situation you would 0:09:49.760 --> 0:09:51.560 have to pay to repair it or would the insurance 0:09:51.600 --> 0:09:53.920 come under you just have to pay the access sure 0:09:54.120 --> 0:09:55.000 six hundred. 0:09:54.679 --> 0:09:58.439 Bucks and fat Chancelord, there is no way that ben 0:09:58.480 --> 0:10:01.559 Netflix ten year old sign just smash two cars of 0:10:01.600 --> 0:10:03.200 dealership and they're going to be like six hundred dollars 0:10:03.240 --> 0:10:05.520 thank you. I'd be like, you're purchasing those two cars? 0:10:05.520 --> 0:10:07.120 I know your net worth? I can google it. 0:10:07.160 --> 0:10:09.320 I would love to know. And maybe this is something 0:10:09.360 --> 0:10:10.960 we can do in a radio segment. What is your 0:10:11.080 --> 0:10:14.280 child ruined? What's something that you own that your child 0:10:14.520 --> 0:10:16.680 has just monumentally fucked up for you? 0:10:16.960 --> 0:10:17.760 I'll go first. 0:10:18.000 --> 0:10:19.839 We bought a brand new couch when we moved into 0:10:19.880 --> 0:10:22.480 our new apartment or a new house, and it's. 0:10:22.360 --> 0:10:23.679 A Koala couch. I love it. 0:10:23.880 --> 0:10:25.720 And I walked out one day and Molly was there 0:10:25.720 --> 0:10:27.959 with a black pen just drawing down the side of it, 0:10:28.240 --> 0:10:31.480 just casually looking me dead into the eyes, like fuck you, mummy, 0:10:31.679 --> 0:10:32.560 drawing down the side of. 0:10:32.559 --> 0:10:34.760 The couch, kind of textile like permit market, just in 0:10:34.760 --> 0:10:37.480 a black barrow, all down the side, all down the side. 0:10:38.120 --> 0:10:40.000 She'd been sitting there doing it for a while. Is 0:10:40.000 --> 0:10:41.240 it still on there because you get off. 0:10:42.679 --> 0:10:45.080 I picked a very good color couch. I picked a 0:10:45.080 --> 0:10:48.280 gray couch so it covered it remotely. But if you 0:10:48.320 --> 0:10:49.720 look closely, yeah, of course you can. 0:10:49.640 --> 0:10:50.120 Still see it. 0:10:50.160 --> 0:10:53.000 Well, I mean, my child has do not get me 0:10:53.040 --> 0:10:54.160 started on your child. 0:10:54.320 --> 0:10:58.240 Oh my child dlah fast four legs and she has 0:10:58.440 --> 0:11:01.960 ruined a lot of things. I don't even know where 0:11:02.000 --> 0:11:02.760 I would start. 0:11:02.880 --> 0:11:04.680 Okay, I'll sign on one of them. We have a 0:11:04.800 --> 0:11:07.360 very big announcement that we're making tomorrow. It's something that 0:11:07.360 --> 0:11:09.000 we've been working on for a long time, something that 0:11:09.040 --> 0:11:12.640 we're really excited about, something that we honestly cannot wait. 0:11:12.480 --> 0:11:16.280 To share with you. And we got given it. 0:11:16.840 --> 0:11:18.640 I like, this is giving it away. 0:11:18.679 --> 0:11:21.480 No one knows reave it under line, people, we got 0:11:21.480 --> 0:11:23.480 given it here it is, here's one for the two 0:11:23.520 --> 0:11:26.679 of you to have together. And I got here today 0:11:27.000 --> 0:11:29.199 and I was like, I can't wait to take a. 0:11:29.160 --> 0:11:30.800 Photo of it. 0:11:30.800 --> 0:11:34.560 It doesn't exist anymore because Delilah ate it. 0:11:34.840 --> 0:11:36.400 And I wish that this was a joke. 0:11:36.480 --> 0:11:39.280 I wish that when somebody went to school and said, 0:11:39.320 --> 0:11:40.400 my dog ate my homework. 0:11:40.520 --> 0:11:42.800 This is literally that situation Britney's dog ate. 0:11:42.800 --> 0:11:48.559 My homework, his most prized possession, something that was very 0:11:48.600 --> 0:11:50.920 meaningful to both of us, and something that we don't 0:11:50.960 --> 0:11:53.240 have the very first one. Yeah, we can't get it 0:11:53.400 --> 0:11:56.439 back right now, so I'm not gonna lie. Do you 0:11:56.520 --> 0:11:58.720 know what I felt like when I saw it? I 0:11:58.800 --> 0:12:01.680 felt like I was the child and I didn't know 0:12:01.679 --> 0:12:04.680 how to tell my parents what had happened you. I 0:12:04.800 --> 0:12:06.280 was like, what am I gonna do that? It's gonna 0:12:06.280 --> 0:12:07.280 be so upset to be I was like, well, am 0:12:07.280 --> 0:12:08.240 I actually gonna do? I was like, I don't know 0:12:08.280 --> 0:12:09.559 how to tell us. I just pretended it was like 0:12:09.600 --> 0:12:13.160 really nonchalant. I was just like, hey, loll so this happened. 0:12:13.559 --> 0:12:16.000 So what we're actually saying on this podcast episode is 0:12:16.040 --> 0:12:20.280 that there is an Australian shepherd dog. It's up upper sale. 0:12:20.280 --> 0:12:21.719 If anyone would like it, you can come pick it 0:12:21.760 --> 0:12:22.400 up from bod Guy. 0:12:22.559 --> 0:12:25.559 I can never I will never leave Delilah in your 0:12:25.600 --> 0:12:27.720 care babysitting, because I'll come She'll be gone. I love 0:12:27.760 --> 0:12:29.440 that and be like, hey, gave her away. I swapped 0:12:29.440 --> 0:12:30.960 her for a plant on the corner of the street. 0:12:31.040 --> 0:12:34.360 I thought it would be easier, but anyway, Okay, let's 0:12:34.360 --> 0:12:36.360 get into all of the questions that you guys have 0:12:36.440 --> 0:12:38.560 written in. I won't give Delilah away. 0:12:38.559 --> 0:12:40.880 I'm not that mean. But also, man, puppies are hard. 0:12:40.960 --> 0:12:45.360 I mean, she didn't choose clothes, everything, announcements, very expensive handbag. Dude, 0:12:45.440 --> 0:12:48.839 she ate my muffin off the bench. She's she's she's 0:12:48.840 --> 0:12:50.720 been running road. Yeah, but she's so cute. 0:12:51.160 --> 0:12:54.600 Yeah, but I think I would rather kids, no way. 0:12:55.040 --> 0:12:59.200 Dog for dogs are very polarizing in that people like, 0:12:59.280 --> 0:13:02.440 if you verbalize that you're not very much of a 0:13:02.440 --> 0:13:03.880 dog person, people get really angry. 0:13:04.040 --> 0:13:06.000 I wouldn't date it. If that's a deal breaker. Yeah, 0:13:06.000 --> 0:13:06.680 you don't like a dog. 0:13:07.160 --> 0:13:09.040 People think you're a psychopath. I have a dog. I 0:13:09.080 --> 0:13:10.959 am a dog person. I'm just not a puppy perpose. 0:13:11.120 --> 0:13:14.000 She's only her birthday in a couple of days. Oh yeah, well, 0:13:14.080 --> 0:13:17.359 good things she's celebrated. She said, that's her celebrating. 0:13:17.720 --> 0:13:22.480 All right, let's get into the questions. Help. I'm in 0:13:22.720 --> 0:13:23.439 a situation. 0:13:24.559 --> 0:13:27.160 I've been with my partner for two years, and recently 0:13:27.240 --> 0:13:31.120 I spent a couple of days away doing house inspections. Now, 0:13:31.280 --> 0:13:33.400 while I was away, I took my partner's laptop with 0:13:33.480 --> 0:13:35.199 me so that I could watch some movies, and because 0:13:35.240 --> 0:13:36.720 I was using it to do a bit of work, 0:13:37.080 --> 0:13:39.920 I was also very bored. Of course you were, so 0:13:40.000 --> 0:13:43.040 I decided to look at his photos. Of course you did, 0:13:43.360 --> 0:13:46.000 and look at his messages. You should stop on his 0:13:46.120 --> 0:13:49.360 laptop I bought. Now, I know I shouldn't have done this, 0:13:49.559 --> 0:13:52.840 but I did it, And anyway, of course I found 0:13:52.840 --> 0:13:55.880 something that has made me feel sick. Now I have 0:13:55.960 --> 0:14:00.240 found two separate videos. They were very sexual video of 0:14:00.360 --> 0:14:03.240 him and other girls in the past. Now, one of 0:14:03.240 --> 0:14:05.440 the videos I have questions about and I want to 0:14:05.480 --> 0:14:08.400 ask him about it. He will obviously know then that 0:14:08.440 --> 0:14:11.400 I went through his stuff. In addition to the videos, 0:14:11.440 --> 0:14:13.960 there was also a message that I found in She 0:14:14.040 --> 0:14:16.280 Went Deep Guys. There was also a message that I 0:14:16.360 --> 0:14:19.400 found of him texting a random number asking if they 0:14:19.400 --> 0:14:22.520 were free, and also asking them how much. This has 0:14:22.560 --> 0:14:25.040 also left me feeling really sick because I never thought 0:14:25.080 --> 0:14:27.320 my partner was like this. What the hell do I 0:14:27.360 --> 0:14:29.960 do do I have to just ignore this whole situation, 0:14:30.160 --> 0:14:33.160 ignore the text messages, ignore the videos, and go on 0:14:33.400 --> 0:14:35.400 and continue to do life as though I don't know 0:14:35.440 --> 0:14:37.560 about this, or can I bring it up with him, 0:14:37.880 --> 0:14:38.560 dun't dun't duh? 0:14:38.680 --> 0:14:39.360 What should I do? 0:14:39.680 --> 0:14:42.360 Was the does it say? Laura? Was the message that 0:14:42.440 --> 0:14:45.960 she found where he said how much an you around 0:14:46.000 --> 0:14:48.040 kind of thing? Was that a message from before the 0:14:48.080 --> 0:14:49.120 relationship as well? 0:14:49.320 --> 0:14:51.280 I get the impression in the way that this is 0:14:51.320 --> 0:14:54.520 worded that maybe there is some loose overlap in from 0:14:54.560 --> 0:14:56.280 the beginning. I feel like they're from quite a long 0:14:56.320 --> 0:14:58.640 time ago. Maybe there is, Like when she says there's 0:14:58.680 --> 0:15:01.040 one of them in particular, I have questions about maybe 0:15:01.040 --> 0:15:03.400 there is some overlap or there's something there that makes 0:15:03.400 --> 0:15:07.680 her feel insecure. But the videos specifically from the question 0:15:07.760 --> 0:15:10.400 are from the past, so previously to her relationship. 0:15:10.440 --> 0:15:12.480 All right, well, you got yourself into a real pickulducle 0:15:12.520 --> 0:15:15.840 here because you did the wrong thing by going through 0:15:15.880 --> 0:15:18.200 his laptop, for sure. Like, I think there needs to 0:15:18.200 --> 0:15:20.600 be a level of privacy in a relationship, and I 0:15:20.640 --> 0:15:23.040 don't mean I think in a relationship you should have 0:15:23.120 --> 0:15:25.040 access to each other's stuff. Like I don't think you 0:15:25.080 --> 0:15:26.720 have to be hiding anything. I think you can know 0:15:26.760 --> 0:15:29.160 each other's passwords, but I think you need to know 0:15:29.280 --> 0:15:33.120 someone's passwords but still have that respect of not diving deep. 0:15:33.160 --> 0:15:35.920 Now I'm not saying that this is your fault, and 0:15:35.960 --> 0:15:39.000 I'm not saying you can't approach him anymore. I'm just 0:15:39.160 --> 0:15:41.880 this is from me in a relationship. I would hate 0:15:42.400 --> 0:15:44.720 if I knew my partner was going through every single 0:15:44.720 --> 0:15:46.720 thing on my computer and I've got nothing to hide. 0:15:46.840 --> 0:15:48.320 I just it just doesn't sit. 0:15:48.200 --> 0:15:48.600 Right with me. 0:15:48.760 --> 0:15:50.640 Yeah, And I think that there's a big difference between 0:15:50.680 --> 0:15:54.320 having like an open phone or open like laptop policy 0:15:54.320 --> 0:15:56.120 in terms of like you know each other's passwords, and 0:15:56.120 --> 0:15:58.400 there's this real level of just like, yeah, sure, what's 0:15:58.400 --> 0:16:04.320 mineus yours verse going really deep and trying to find 0:16:04.360 --> 0:16:07.480 something like I think that they're very different things. And 0:16:07.760 --> 0:16:09.440 you know what, I know what happens to a lot 0:16:09.440 --> 0:16:12.280 of people that the curiosity becomes overwhelming and that you 0:16:12.360 --> 0:16:15.280 do kind of find yourself down a rabbit hole. I 0:16:15.280 --> 0:16:17.640 guess the biggest problem is, though, is then when you 0:16:17.680 --> 0:16:20.560 do come across something, trying to explain how you got 0:16:20.600 --> 0:16:23.760 into that rabbit hole in the first place can be 0:16:23.840 --> 0:16:24.720 a bit of a situation. 0:16:25.080 --> 0:16:27.000 Yeah, And if you want to approach him now and 0:16:27.040 --> 0:16:29.040 talk about it, which I think you're going to have to, 0:16:29.240 --> 0:16:32.320 because it sounds like now that you've got this knowledge, 0:16:32.360 --> 0:16:34.040