Speaker 1: Flex and Frooms, Flex and Frooms. This is the Flex
Speaker 1: and Frooms catch up podcast.
Speaker 2: It is Flex and Frooms on Cata. We got a
Speaker 2: fantastic DM. What was actually directly to my Instagram, not
Speaker 2: the Flex and Frooms page.
Speaker 1: Really do either. Mickey's in the Flex and Rooms insta.
Speaker 2: You know, I dip in and out of the dms,
Speaker 2: So depending where you want to go, will we will
Speaker 2: see it.
Speaker 1: I got this DM.
Speaker 2: I won't say their name, but they wrote, Hi, Frooms
Speaker 2: and flex pleasant, smiley face. I'm wondering how you guys
Speaker 2: maintain a lust for life. I've been going through a
Speaker 2: depression and feeling unable to snap out of it and
Speaker 2: really feel brain dead, fatigued, et cetera. Can you guys
Speaker 2: talk about any mental health experiences you've had and how
Speaker 2: you got through them. Thank you so much if you
Speaker 2: choose to read this message. You guys are so wonderful
Speaker 2: and funny and a huge pleasure to listen to.
Speaker 1: Heartheart.
Speaker 2: When I got this message, obviously I sent it directly
Speaker 2: to FLEXI and I wrote cute. She obviously got the
Speaker 2: memo about being polite because there was quite a few
Speaker 2: thank you. Yeah, it was a little bit of a compliment.
Speaker 2: There was some smiling. It's really great, and you know,
Speaker 2: I'm wondering. I love that kind of language rather than
Speaker 2: tell us how to tell us you're not depressed, yeah.
Speaker 1: And wanting to eat for me, The number.
Speaker 2: One tip that I'll have, just that's the surface level one,
Speaker 2: is that you always need something to look forward to.
Speaker 2: This is quite, yes, I guess antithetical to what depression
Speaker 2: feels like, but I feel like for some people when
Speaker 2: they're depressed, they don't look forward to anything, even if
Speaker 2: it's cool, things like you're numb, you're not feeling anything. However,
Speaker 2: for some types of depression, I think they can be
Speaker 2: somewhat rectified by having something to look forward to.
Speaker 1: So in the school holidays, I used to get.
Speaker 2: Really down, really sad, like low mood, melancholy vibes, and
Speaker 2: it was because I didn't have structure. I didn't have
Speaker 2: school to look forward to, I didn't have any like
Speaker 2: And I get it now because I'm freelance, like I
Speaker 2: can go a week without putting work off or you know,
Speaker 2: because you just work on your own hours and then
Speaker 2: you think overthink things and you feel depressed. So for
Speaker 2: me it would be try to book in things that
Speaker 2: you are looking forward to, and then hope that in
Speaker 2: the interim your excitement gathers, because yes, sometimes you have
Speaker 2: to put yourself out there to create plans when you
Speaker 2: can't be bothered. But it's like the whole get out
Speaker 2: of the house, go for a walk, like that is
Speaker 2: actually the hardest step. So if you think about that
Speaker 2: as the hardest step, maybe that will help your brain.
Speaker 2: Maybe the most obvious for me, like illustration of a
Speaker 2: depression or guess that was like obvious to me and
Speaker 2: other people is when I had an eating disorder. So
Speaker 2: when I had an eating disorder and I was trigger
Speaker 2: wanting anorexic, I didn't allow myself to feel anything. If
Speaker 2: I felt sad, I would never attribute that to the
Speaker 2: eating disorder.
Speaker 1: I thought it was something else.
Speaker 2: Now that I'm out of it, it was a few
Speaker 2: years ago I realized that it was a self fulfilling prophecy.
Speaker 2: So me being hungry all the time, me denying myself things,
Speaker 2: I was denying my feelings. I was denying that I
Speaker 2: was a human being. I kind of treated myself like
Speaker 2: I was a machine. And that meant that it was
Speaker 2: very hard to enjoy things that are enjoyable. I've been
Speaker 2: doing quite a bit of research about it. So for example,
Speaker 2: this won't apply to everyone, of course, but for some
Speaker 2: people who say, have anorexia, your dopemine, serotonin, and cortisol
Speaker 2: levels can be out of whack. It's inconclusive whether or
Speaker 2: not this is like people are more predisposed to developing
Speaker 2: anerexcir because they already have an imbalance, or if they're
Speaker 2: not eating encourages it. But essentially like and this is
Speaker 2: how I feel now, I get dope maine from eating McDonald's.
Speaker 2: I get dope mean from having a delicious meal with
Speaker 2: friends when I was the opposite of that. I will
Speaker 2: get dope mean from not eating, so me going hours
Speaker 2: that eating it actually makes.
Speaker 1: You feel bad eating. It's not even because you feel
Speaker 1: bad because like this is gonna make me fat. You
Speaker 1: feel bad because you don't get rewhite.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you get fully rewired to be the inverse like
Speaker 2: the colors go inverse, which I think is a good
Speaker 2: thing to learn. If you have anyone in your life
Speaker 2: who's struggling with an eating disorder and you're like, how
Speaker 2: are they not eating? Like eat, eat eat, you tell
Speaker 2: them to eat a sandwich like that's actually going against
Speaker 2: their chemical balance. So my first little tip is to
Speaker 2: figure out what your goal is. So when I was
Speaker 2: at my lowest, I got to the point where I
Speaker 2: was like, I.
Speaker 1: Will trade anything.
Speaker 2: I will trade my body that I felt I had perfected.
Speaker 2: I'll trade my work. I'll trade any goal that I
Speaker 2: had with work. I've always been quite sure of what
Speaker 2: I wanted, and I had real big dreams and goals
Speaker 2: and I felt like I was definitely on track to
Speaker 2: hit them. I thought, I'll give that away. I give
Speaker 2: my body, I'll give my work, I'll give everything away
Speaker 2: just to feel enjoyment, just to be able to enjoy
Speaker 2: these things that I enjoyed when I was a kid.
Speaker 2: And the first little bits of that were really hard,
Speaker 2: but I would just keep that in the back of
Speaker 2: my head. I want to feel enjoyment. I want to
Speaker 2: feel enjoyment. And then it did come at the cost
Speaker 2: of that body. It came at the cost of certain
Speaker 2: work opportunities. I didn't feel as sharp as I was
Speaker 2: before because I was very sharp when I was anorexic,
Speaker 2: Like your brain can become very hyper focused on things,
Speaker 2: which is helpful with work, I think. But I got
Speaker 2: what I wished for I enjoy things, and so the
Speaker 2: hardest step was, like I need to do this hardest thing,
Speaker 2: knowing that this is the only way forward because I
Speaker 2: can't go down this road.
Speaker 1: So maybe if you're at.
Speaker 2: The point with your depression where you kind of feel
Speaker 2: like you're at the end bit of your options, sit
Speaker 2: down with yourself and think, what do I actually what
Speaker 2: do I want if I could feel feelings again, what
Speaker 2: is the feeling that I want to feel?
Speaker 1: And start from there. That's what I would do.
Speaker 2: Start in a higher way, rather than beating yourself up
Speaker 2: about like knocketting out of bed or not doing this
Speaker 2: or that. Start with a desire that is both like ephemeral,
Speaker 2: something like enjoyment is quite ephemeral. It's not based on
Speaker 2: any achievement, and then explore it. I wish you, honestly,
Speaker 2: nothing but the best I wrote at the end of this,
Speaker 2: I love you and you can do it. Let's try together,
Speaker 2: love heart, Thank you.
Speaker 1: I saw you like, why did we not end there?
Speaker 1: That's perfect? Thanks Queen. You've been listening to The Flex
Speaker 1: and Froom's daily podcast.
Speaker 2: For more, Tune Indicator on DAB or stream it on iHeartRadio.