WEBVTT - Is This Rude Behaviour Or Are We All Doing It? 🥴 0:00:01.520 --> 0:00:03.360 Flex and Frooms, Flex and Frooms. 0:00:03.560 --> 0:00:07.600 This is the Flex and Frooms catch up podcast, Happy Lines. 0:00:08.680 --> 0:00:11.879 A little listener question, is this rude now on the 0:00:11.920 --> 0:00:15.760 sheet that I have here? Yeah? Is this rude? That's 0:00:15.760 --> 0:00:17.680 all that's written. So we're just going to get into it. 0:00:17.960 --> 0:00:20.320 And also, where is our cult located. 0:00:21.960 --> 0:00:26.880 Rooms is working today? Everyone? She's clocked on? Award winning 0:00:26.880 --> 0:00:28.840 podcaster always always Let's go. 0:00:29.080 --> 0:00:32.040 This is Flex and Frooms on kit in. 0:00:32.040 --> 0:00:35.080 Good news potentially bad news, depending on how you're geared 0:00:35.200 --> 0:00:38.280 positively or negatively. I did come across a bit of 0:00:38.280 --> 0:00:40.479 a viral video. I feel like a Facebook mom. It's 0:00:40.479 --> 0:00:43.720 every day viral video. Viral video. Read a book, cite 0:00:43.800 --> 0:00:48.720 the encyclopedia anyway, computer in the seventies, nineteen seventy three 0:00:48.840 --> 0:00:52.040 in particular, predicted the end of the world using a 0:00:52.159 --> 0:00:54.280 very simple line graph, and that's what hurts me the most. 0:00:54.320 --> 0:00:59.880 This wasn't any complex technology. It was simple maths, protractor, ruler, 0:01:00.040 --> 0:01:04.839 are a few lines and it's pretty sad. It's the source, 0:01:04.880 --> 0:01:07.640 the reference. The use name is viral history. Not sure 0:01:07.640 --> 0:01:10.360 you'll find it. Who's the guy speaking? I don't know 0:01:11.160 --> 0:01:14.040 as a robot. No, it's a real man, but I'll 0:01:14.080 --> 0:01:15.280 play it for you right now. 0:01:15.560 --> 0:01:18.240 Very simple graphs which project what's going to happen to 0:01:18.280 --> 0:01:20.800 the planet over the next one hundred and fifty years 0:01:20.920 --> 0:01:23.240 if we don't do something drastic to stop it. From 0:01:23.319 --> 0:01:27.920 nineteen forty on, the quality of life diminishes. Here we 0:01:27.959 --> 0:01:29.360 are about the turn of the century, and we come 0:01:29.440 --> 0:01:32.800 up to the twenty twenty and it's really come right 0:01:32.840 --> 0:01:36.760 back while people, of course, means that you start to 0:01:36.840 --> 0:01:39.280 chew up your supply of natural resources. And this is 0:01:39.319 --> 0:01:43.080 this curve here, being curve that shows that slowly but 0:01:43.160 --> 0:01:47.520 steadily the pool of natural wealth in the world, natural resources, minerals, oil, 0:01:47.560 --> 0:01:50.480 and so on, is slowly but steadily diminishing. So this 0:01:50.520 --> 0:01:54.520 is the situation. As population increases, the quality of life decreases, 0:01:54.760 --> 0:01:57.840 and the supply of natural resources decreases. But haven't looked 0:01:57.840 --> 0:02:00.640 at this curve here. This is called the Z curve, 0:02:00.680 --> 0:02:04.880 and it represents poplar pollution. Now predictably enough, as the 0:02:04.920 --> 0:02:09.799 population increases. Up to nineteen eighty, pollution increases is more rubbish. 0:02:10.200 --> 0:02:12.960 But from nineteen eighty to the year twenty twenty, pollution 0:02:13.240 --> 0:02:15.360 really takes off. This is assuming of course, that we 0:02:15.400 --> 0:02:18.239 don't do anything about it. So the year twenty twenty, 0:02:18.480 --> 0:02:21.519 the condition of the planet starts to become highly critical, 0:02:21.639 --> 0:02:23.440 and if we don't do anything about it, this is 0:02:23.440 --> 0:02:26.400 what's going to happen. The quality of life is going 0:02:26.440 --> 0:02:30.200 to go right back to practically zero. Pollution is going 0:02:30.240 --> 0:02:33.919 to become so serious right out here that it will 0:02:33.919 --> 0:02:39.200 start to kill people. So the population will diminish right 0:02:39.240 --> 0:02:41.320 back here less than it was in the year nineteen hundred, 0:02:41.960 --> 0:02:44.919 and at this stage round about the year twenty forty 0:02:44.919 --> 0:02:47.840 two and fifty, civilized life as we know on this 0:02:47.880 --> 0:02:52.000 planet will cease to exist. Well hopefully, of course it 0:02:52.040 --> 0:02:54.400 won't be allowed to happen, but it's taken this kind 0:02:54.440 --> 0:02:57.160 of shock treatment to nudge governments into doing something, and 0:02:57.200 --> 0:02:59.720 slowly we are. We're starting to clean up our atmosphere, 0:02:59.760 --> 0:03:02.800 where starting to recycle out rubbish. We're doing something positive 0:03:02.840 --> 0:03:04.040 about population control. 0:03:04.360 --> 0:03:08.079 Sir, First, you got laugh. 0:03:08.440 --> 0:03:11.760 Yeah, the first thing I love to hear in Australian accent. 0:03:11.840 --> 0:03:15.359 Oh I know, And plainly speaking, he said pollution going 0:03:15.480 --> 0:03:19.040 right up, quality of life going right down, and we 0:03:19.120 --> 0:03:24.040 know that was nineteen seventy and he'd imply that, you know, 0:03:24.240 --> 0:03:28.200 a push had been happening at that time. It's not beforehand, 0:03:28.240 --> 0:03:32.120 just fifty years ago exactly. Yes, that felt like it'selt 0:03:32.120 --> 0:03:33.480 like he was kind of like, this is where our 0:03:33.480 --> 0:03:36.320 wits end now, so let's start making changes. And now 0:03:36.360 --> 0:03:38.160 I'm coming to you in twenty twenty three to say, sir, 0:03:38.480 --> 0:03:41.119 a few things didn't get done half a century later, 0:03:41.480 --> 0:03:43.600 didn't really get to it. But what I will say 0:03:43.600 --> 0:03:45.560 is that if we are on track for a late 0:03:45.640 --> 0:03:47.440 twenty fifty oblivion, what are we going to do with 0:03:47.480 --> 0:03:48.080 the rest of our time? 0:03:48.160 --> 0:03:51.120 Everyone, I mean at least was to be like, we've 0:03:51.120 --> 0:03:51.880 got good years left. 0:03:51.920 --> 0:03:55.040 Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's like the natural resolution of that 0:03:55.200 --> 0:03:55.800 time here. 0:03:56.040 --> 0:03:57.920 Going back to yeah, like in the old days when 0:03:57.920 --> 0:03:59.400 people died when they were fifty. 0:04:00.840 --> 0:04:06.080 Embracing tradition. Wow, all that to say, a few things 0:04:06.120 --> 0:04:10.920 remain true. Society does not respect academics, women in academics. 0:04:12.440 --> 0:04:14.000 It just it's makes sense. 0:04:14.080 --> 0:04:19.680 How many times can we hear the same kind of 0:04:19.839 --> 0:04:23.400 information told in a thousand different ways, with a thousand 0:04:23.480 --> 0:04:27.479 different bits of evidence, and just nothing happens. That is 0:04:27.480 --> 0:04:30.560 the bit I'm confused by, And the sinister part of 0:04:30.560 --> 0:04:33.880 me is like the people who have the resources to 0:04:33.960 --> 0:04:39.120 not be affected will be unaffected, regardless, regardless what they say. 0:04:39.240 --> 0:04:43.400 So they're not trying to busy themselves with what's your word? 0:04:43.839 --> 0:04:46.440 Common folk? Common with common folk work, it's not on 0:04:46.520 --> 0:04:51.960 their agenda. And unfortunately, I fear I understand that time 0:04:52.000 --> 0:04:54.000 we talked about some dating content, I did make a 0:04:54.080 --> 0:04:56.160 vow that anytime we'd discuss it, though, it would need 0:04:56.200 --> 0:05:00.880 to be from a fresh new angle. Actually, because by 0:05:00.960 --> 0:05:05.080 the time this reaches you, people have plagiarized us already. 0:05:05.080 --> 0:05:07.040 I'm talking in the mere minutes, it's gone from our 0:05:07.120 --> 0:05:10.560 mouth to this microphone and uploaded into the airwaves. Some 0:05:10.680 --> 0:05:13.560 other podcasts like this is good information, and they plagiarize it. 0:05:13.720 --> 0:05:17.880 So in coming to you with information that only we could, 0:05:18.720 --> 0:05:24.080 We've got tiktoks, we've got treachery, We've also got a podcast. 0:05:25.960 --> 0:05:30.800 What do you say, wait for it, wait for it. 0:05:31.360 --> 0:05:33.919 What do you think is the ultimate indicator of a 0:05:33.920 --> 0:05:37.000 successful relationship. I'm talking at the early stages when you 0:05:37.400 --> 0:05:40.800 just like first touched fingers with someone, when you first 0:05:40.839 --> 0:05:43.400 even looked at them. What is the ultimate indicator? Is 0:05:43.400 --> 0:05:44.839 it the level of attraction you share? 0:05:45.320 --> 0:05:45.520 Is it? 0:05:45.560 --> 0:05:51.480 Your financial status is it? Is it the clothes you're wearing? 0:05:51.880 --> 0:06:03.839 Is it the pheromones. According to research research, it is inconclusive, inconclusive. 0:06:04.800 --> 0:06:09.320 At this point, it's just vibes. Listen to this TikTok 0:06:09.480 --> 0:06:13.600 by Ben Spalos. He'll do a much better job at 0:06:13.600 --> 0:06:17.359 explaining the nonsense that is happening when it comes to 0:06:17.440 --> 0:06:19.920 picking a partner and picking a mate. And I'm sure 0:06:19.960 --> 0:06:22.840 he'll make you feel ashamed for how much effort, how 0:06:22.920 --> 0:06:26.680 much specificity and strategy you put into it up until 0:06:26.680 --> 0:06:31.000 this point, because it was all for no reason, for nothing, 0:06:31.520 --> 0:06:32.080 for nothing. 0:06:32.760 --> 0:06:35.080 And is this guy like a scientist. 0:06:36.200 --> 0:06:38.080 I've thought about this recently, so but no one saw this. 0:06:38.200 --> 0:06:39.960 Let me just say this again so you can understand this. 0:06:40.160 --> 0:06:43.640 I read a study recently called is Romantic Desire Predictable? 0:06:43.839 --> 0:06:46.560 And they found no bro stick around. They found if 0:06:46.560 --> 0:06:49.039 they use machine learning to try and create models to 0:06:49.080 --> 0:06:51.640 try and predict if people would like each other when 0:06:51.640 --> 0:06:54.119 they met, they can predict how relatively they could predict 0:06:54.120 --> 0:06:58.640 people's tastes. Kind of, they can predict how relatively attractive 0:06:58.640 --> 0:07:02.000 people are generally other people, but the effect was really small. 0:07:02.120 --> 0:07:07.080 But dude, when two people came together, they couldn't predict anything. 0:07:07.880 --> 0:07:09.680 It's completely there dark How they. 0:07:09.640 --> 0:07:12.520 Started this article and the introduction, they talked about how 0:07:12.520 --> 0:07:15.200 speed dating apps make these claims that they can do this, 0:07:16.360 --> 0:07:19.720 but that these claims aren't scientifically vetted. The article is 0:07:19.760 --> 0:07:23.040 called is Romantic Desire Predictable? The primary author Samantha Jowel. 0:07:23.040 --> 0:07:24.360 You can literally read this if you look this up 0:07:24.400 --> 0:07:25.480 on the internet to please. 0:07:25.160 --> 0:07:27.720 Do excuse me, but saw this. 0:07:27.840 --> 0:07:30.320 Let me just joker origin story. 0:07:30.880 --> 0:07:33.200 So what we're hearing now, what we're going to discuss 0:07:33.240 --> 0:07:36.560 in our podcast is a lot of people, ourselves included, 0:07:36.640 --> 0:07:40.320 have convinced ourselves that dating and finding a partner is 0:07:40.320 --> 0:07:44.400 a series of strategic moves, right, especially in that early 0:07:44.440 --> 0:07:48.760 stage before you even met someone. The way you're presenting yourself, 0:07:49.000 --> 0:07:51.680 the social circles you hang out with, the energy that 0:07:52.160 --> 0:07:55.800 permeates the room, all of this feels so intentional. So 0:07:55.840 --> 0:07:59.040 it's to tract the right partner to have the right relationship. 0:07:59.080 --> 0:08:02.200 But what we're finding is, yes, you can dress yourself 0:08:02.200 --> 0:08:04.520 in a certain way that will make yourself look more appealing, 0:08:04.960 --> 0:08:07.760 you can go to certain places, you can interact with 0:08:07.800 --> 0:08:10.520 certain kinds of people, But whether or not there will 0:08:10.560 --> 0:08:13.920 be romantic compatibility is totally up to chance. 0:08:14.720 --> 0:08:17.920 Whoa chance vibes is this one. 0:08:17.880 --> 0:08:22.520 Study University of Pennsylvania Rooms is like, unfortunately, I'm going 0:08:22.600 --> 0:08:25.840 to debunk the science and even there's more to discuss. 0:08:25.880 --> 0:08:29.560 Let's debate this because something about the way that relationships 0:08:29.600 --> 0:08:34.040 are the fifty percent at minimum divorce rate, the amount 0:08:34.080 --> 0:08:38.199 of dating just conjecture and squabble and discussion there is 0:08:38.880 --> 0:08:42.600 it's not really getting people to this end goal they 0:08:42.600 --> 0:08:45.240 think it is. Alas, our podcast is Flex and Rooms. 0:08:45.240 --> 0:08:47.400 You can listen to it anywhere you get good podcasts. 0:08:47.480 --> 0:08:51.520 We recommend it four point nine stars, thousands of reviews, 0:08:51.840 --> 0:08:54.719 and it has won awards. 0:08:54.559 --> 0:08:59.040 Why would you laugh just a way like you're talking 0:08:59.080 --> 0:09:00.720 in this bay funny to me? 0:09:00.880 --> 0:09:02.840 Like it's a comedian. 0:09:02.920 --> 0:09:04.320 Yeah, you're a comedian. Comedian. 0:09:04.440 --> 0:09:07.160 If you're you've been shooting in for the last couple 0:09:07.200 --> 0:09:09.240 of weeks, you would have known that we are building 0:09:09.360 --> 0:09:12.160 conceptually a cult or a utopia. We talk a lot 0:09:12.240 --> 0:09:15.840 about the way the world is going to shoot. Yeah, 0:09:16.640 --> 0:09:19.960 and you know, it's a practical conversation to have, but 0:09:20.040 --> 0:09:23.040 I also think we can invite some whimsy to it. 0:09:23.120 --> 0:09:25.319 You know, let's have a little fun with it. A 0:09:25.360 --> 0:09:27.480 few minutes ago, I told you that a computer predicted 0:09:27.600 --> 0:09:31.120 the end of the world in the seventies. Twenty fifty 0:09:31.280 --> 0:09:33.440 was the date that was given. But not to stress, 0:09:33.440 --> 0:09:35.640 because in the meantime we can still have fun. Do 0:09:35.720 --> 0:09:38.760 you want to join our cult? By listening, you're already 0:09:39.240 --> 0:09:43.040 the admission is there implicated entry fees free. We figured 0:09:43.040 --> 0:09:46.000 out that I am the leader. Yes, the cult name 0:09:46.160 --> 0:09:47.880 is Ah. 0:09:48.240 --> 0:09:52.680 The third space yep. And then the byeline is getting 0:09:52.720 --> 0:09:53.600 near it getting near? 0:09:53.640 --> 0:09:55.920 It was that? Actually what I something like that? I 0:09:55.920 --> 0:09:58.280 mean it's a work in progress. Everyone in the details, 0:09:58.360 --> 0:09:59.880 they don't really matter. It's about the feeling and the 0:10:00.240 --> 0:10:04.320 and the unity, belonging to community, et cetera. Now, geographically, 0:10:07.920 --> 0:10:10.280 oh no, here, no, I gotta I got everyone, no 0:10:10.360 --> 0:10:13.400 stress sits here right here. Our cult is called redacted. 0:10:13.640 --> 0:10:17.040 The byline, the third space. We prioritize getting near and 0:10:17.040 --> 0:10:17.800 bonding with each other. 0:10:17.840 --> 0:10:18.320 There we go. 0:10:18.400 --> 0:10:20.520 Last week we determined what roles people want to play. 0:10:20.640 --> 0:10:23.680 This week, where we're gonna build the place. I mean, 0:10:24.160 --> 0:10:26.920 there's this one house on domain I've been wanting on 0:10:27.000 --> 0:10:29.280 real estate dot com. Actually they're probably owned by the 0:10:29.280 --> 0:10:33.160 same people these days. You know, this is one house 0:10:33.160 --> 0:10:37.000 I've wanted to buy for a Jerz it. 0:10:36.800 --> 0:10:39.120 Is in another one. 0:10:39.120 --> 0:10:43.000 It's the like Palace, so the Greek not that one, no, no, no, 0:10:43.160 --> 0:10:45.160 but I know the one you're talking about. No, this 0:10:45.200 --> 0:10:50.280 one is in Queensland, Incily. If you're time in the 0:10:50.280 --> 0:10:52.600 bubble house real estate dot com, it'll be there. It's 0:10:52.640 --> 0:10:55.960 been taken off sale, okay. And it was a really 0:10:56.040 --> 0:10:57.839 great price for a cult house. I think it was 0:10:57.880 --> 0:11:00.720 about under two million. If we're put our money together, 0:11:00.760 --> 0:11:03.760 I'll definitely get the mortgage out. Don't stress. If we 0:11:03.800 --> 0:11:06.640 all put our money together, we can really get something done. 0:11:06.880 --> 0:11:09.520 It is an architectural marvel. The person selling is the 0:11:09.600 --> 0:11:11.880 architect who actually built the space. It looks like a 0:11:11.920 --> 0:11:16.480 ton of bubbles, like smashed together to build. Yeah, this 0:11:16.640 --> 0:11:19.359 dome sque house. It looks like a spaceship. It's incredible. 0:11:21.080 --> 0:11:22.400 I tried to look for it the other day. I'm 0:11:22.440 --> 0:11:24.319 not sure if it's still available to buy, but if 0:11:24.360 --> 0:11:26.800 we're interested, I can reach out directly. In start of 0:11:26.760 --> 0:11:29.000 fear those conversations, I'd be more than happy to. This 0:11:29.080 --> 0:11:30.920 is the coolest thing ever Now in terms of be 0:11:30.920 --> 0:11:34.120 living there permanently, that is just me. But I will 0:11:34.240 --> 0:11:37.920 hold cult sessions on the lawn plea. The back because 0:11:37.920 --> 0:11:41.080 we will have some land and we will be growing 0:11:41.160 --> 0:11:42.640 various things on the land. 0:11:42.800 --> 0:11:44.280 It's not the craziest thing I've ever seen. 0:11:44.640 --> 0:11:49.440 It's beautiful. Wow, don't worry, I will buy that house 0:11:49.440 --> 0:11:53.880 one day. Cult. Oh no, cult, I'm not stressed. I 0:11:53.920 --> 0:11:57.000 would say, though, if we're talking about a modern day 0:11:57.040 --> 0:11:59.199 cult and the way to do it, well, if we're 0:11:59.200 --> 0:12:02.120 talking about how to do anything in the best way possible, 0:12:02.120 --> 0:12:04.760 we have to look at what's not worked previously. And 0:12:04.960 --> 0:12:07.280 part of the key theme about a lot of cults 0:12:07.360 --> 0:12:10.600 is this isolation that happens from your regular life and 0:12:10.640 --> 0:12:13.480 your family into this shared space. I don't want to 0:12:13.520 --> 0:12:16.360 share a space. I live alone for a reason, So 0:12:16.440 --> 0:12:18.360 I don't think we should live together in this cult. 0:12:18.360 --> 0:12:21.640 Should we live in the same suburb, Yeah, that'd be sick, Collingwood, 0:12:22.320 --> 0:12:26.720 it's the same country. Sure, that'd be sick. But the 0:12:26.760 --> 0:12:30.559 same exact like home. Not necessary. We're adults, you don't 0:12:30.600 --> 0:12:33.360 think so. I don't think it's necessary. I think it's 0:12:33.360 --> 0:12:36.960 like a cool little like added package. You reach the 0:12:37.000 --> 0:12:42.160 top level, sure, but as a starting we're we're trying 0:12:42.200 --> 0:12:44.840 to reach the world here. I think eight billion people 0:12:44.880 --> 0:12:46.240 live on one plot of land. 0:12:46.120 --> 0:12:48.880 Oh, definitely. It's a virtual place. It's like giving the 0:12:48.960 --> 0:12:50.120 meta virtual. 0:12:50.040 --> 0:12:52.559 You have a hotel, everyone, just have a hotel. We'll 0:12:52.600 --> 0:12:52.920 see that. 0:12:53.640 --> 0:12:56.560 We have a love line. Please, Caitlyn play the tape. 0:13:00.240 --> 0:13:03.880 Hello Lovely. This is my favorite segment because it's when 0:13:03.920 --> 0:13:07.520 a listener sends in h an issue. 0:13:07.679 --> 0:13:09.240 Yeah, relationship dilemma. 0:13:09.679 --> 0:13:11.520 We need to get to the bottom of this is 0:13:11.520 --> 0:13:15.560 from a real life listener. Her name is redacted. I'm 0:13:15.600 --> 0:13:16.040 going to. 0:13:17.120 --> 0:13:19.240 You said a couple minutes ago. So maybe it was 0:13:19.280 --> 0:13:23.080 yesterday that you don't know. So you said earlier that 0:13:23.240 --> 0:13:25.960 you spoke to a listener who didn't know what the 0:13:26.000 --> 0:13:28.720 word redacted was and then proceeded not to explain what 0:13:28.800 --> 0:13:30.640 it was and then proceed to use it further. 0:13:30.840 --> 0:13:32.960 Yeah, yeah, but that's what it is. He wouln google 0:13:33.000 --> 0:13:35.000 it if they want. Okay, okay, So I'm going to 0:13:35.040 --> 0:13:36.360 read this out. Then we're going to take a break, 0:13:36.360 --> 0:13:39.280 and we'll come back with our opinion. So everybody please listening. 0:13:39.320 --> 0:13:43.040 Hats on, let's go. I'm seeing a guy who I 0:13:43.080 --> 0:13:45.160 was in the talking stage with for three months while 0:13:45.160 --> 0:13:48.679 he traveled well in Brackets. We met the week before 0:13:48.679 --> 0:13:50.720 he left, but was super good at keeping in touch 0:13:50.760 --> 0:13:53.760 while he was away cute. We got on so well 0:13:53.840 --> 0:13:56.120 during that stage that I assumed it would be fireworks 0:13:56.160 --> 0:13:58.720 when he finally got back. That wasn't the case for me. 0:13:59.120 --> 0:14:01.680 But he seems feel all the sparks in the world, 0:14:02.000 --> 0:14:04.360 as he is voiced many times that I'm perfect, and 0:14:04.400 --> 0:14:07.000 it feels like we've known each other before. Now that 0:14:07.040 --> 0:14:09.440 we've had sex and been intimate a handful of times, 0:14:09.679 --> 0:14:11.880 I know for certain that there's no massive spark and 0:14:11.920 --> 0:14:14.360 I won't be able to be exclusive with him. I've 0:14:14.400 --> 0:14:16.120 voiced this to him and he said he agrees and 0:14:16.160 --> 0:14:18.400 also wants something low commitment, but then he continues to 0:14:18.440 --> 0:14:21.800 do very big commitment things like hosting family dinners. Well, 0:14:21.800 --> 0:14:24.680 I'm over suggesting data activities involve a lot of more, 0:14:24.800 --> 0:14:27.360 a lot more than casual sex, and just generally being 0:14:27.400 --> 0:14:29.880 head over heels for me. Lol. What I'm wondering is 0:14:29.880 --> 0:14:31.640 why it's so hard for me to confront the fact 0:14:31.680 --> 0:14:33.560 that I'm just not that into him. In brackets to 0:14:33.640 --> 0:14:39.000 tie in through his favor audio experience xx Ah finished brackets, Lol. 0:14:39.720 --> 0:14:41.720 It seems I'm so conditioned to expect a man to 0:14:41.720 --> 0:14:44.240 reject me that I can't comprehend what to do when 0:14:44.240 --> 0:14:46.920 the cards are reversed and I'm the one wanting less 0:14:46.960 --> 0:14:50.320 exclusivity from a seemingly perfect man. Oh my god, Can 0:14:50.360 --> 0:14:52.960 you gos relate to this confusion when it comes with 0:14:53.040 --> 0:14:55.040 a man who can't get enough of you? Or am 0:14:55.040 --> 0:14:57.920 I sabotaging an otherwise amazing thing? I just want to 0:14:57.960 --> 0:14:59.680 keep a casual and see other people, but I feel 0:14:59.720 --> 0:15:03.000 it would be disrespectful, considering he's only showing me respect 0:15:03.000 --> 0:15:06.560 and affection, things most girls would kill for. I'm so 0:15:06.600 --> 0:15:08.680 sure you have some juicy thoughts. Love you both, and 0:15:08.800 --> 0:15:11.080 Mickey more than life itself. You're the best. 0:15:11.440 --> 0:15:12.360 Well I love this. 0:15:13.560 --> 0:15:18.000 Oh my god, babes. So this one's titled You're the 0:15:18.040 --> 0:15:21.880 Problem actually part one the problem. That's just part of 0:15:21.880 --> 0:15:26.160 my notes. Yeah please, there's some residual feelings. 0:15:26.240 --> 0:15:26.520 Yeah ye. 0:15:27.240 --> 0:15:30.280 So this woman was in the talking stage with the 0:15:30.280 --> 0:15:32.600 guy for three weeks. They met a week before months 0:15:32.840 --> 0:15:35.360 three months, they met a week before he went overseas, 0:15:35.400 --> 0:15:38.600 and they were dearly dealing while he was os. That's 0:15:38.600 --> 0:15:39.280 the first problem. 0:15:39.680 --> 0:15:42.480 Have great conversations. She did say they were. They were 0:15:43.240 --> 0:15:45.480 Oh no, no, no, continue, you look like you were frowning. 0:15:45.720 --> 0:15:47.320 She did say they were able to keep up some 0:15:47.360 --> 0:15:49.840 really good conversations, which was a good sign. And assume 0:15:49.880 --> 0:15:52.520 that when he get back, sparks would be a flying. 0:15:53.080 --> 0:15:56.840 The sparks were not flying. They went on dates, participated 0:15:56.880 --> 0:15:59.720 in intimate activities. The vibes are just not there for her. 0:16:00.200 --> 0:16:03.280 For him, he's thinking, oh my god, I found we've 0:16:03.320 --> 0:16:04.880 known each other in the life. When they hit you 0:16:04.880 --> 0:16:08.360 with that that he's done this from sort of magic. Okay, 0:16:08.400 --> 0:16:11.440 So my opinion on this is that he is whipped 0:16:11.840 --> 0:16:15.840 because a like, while he's traveling, he was putting his 0:16:15.920 --> 0:16:18.640 eggs in your basket. So he's around gallivanting the world. 0:16:18.720 --> 0:16:20.640 In his mind, he's seeing the best of the best. 0:16:20.960 --> 0:16:22.680 He's on holidays. Do you know what I'm saying? Like 0:16:22.760 --> 0:16:27.200 he's gallivanting and he's still putting his eggs into your basket, 0:16:27.240 --> 0:16:35.960 so he has like an invested interest. Meanwhile it's giving. 0:16:37.760 --> 0:16:39.680 It's giving, Like this is why you need to spend 0:16:39.680 --> 0:16:42.440 a lot of time together and not talk on the internet. 0:16:45.440 --> 0:16:49.360 You runner rooms is correct. That's not where I thought 0:16:49.400 --> 0:16:51.280 this was going. And I didn't even think of that, 0:16:51.320 --> 0:16:56.000 But you know what, you are so right? People don't ask. 0:16:55.840 --> 0:16:59.000 Surprise, No, it's a nice feeling to be like. 0:16:59.040 --> 0:17:03.320 You are so right, people will shame you for being 0:17:03.440 --> 0:17:05.919 what I refer to as a turbo data someone. In 0:17:05.960 --> 0:17:08.000 the early stages of dating, you spend a lot of 0:17:08.040 --> 0:17:11.120 consecutive time together. You might go on three dates a week. 0:17:11.320 --> 0:17:14.440 You know, asleep over, you're talking consistently. People say, slow 0:17:14.480 --> 0:17:15.919 it down, get to know each other, just thro your 0:17:15.920 --> 0:17:20.360 phone calls. Don't integrate and immerse yourself in each other 0:17:20.400 --> 0:17:22.960 so soon, because what if it doesn't work out, then 0:17:23.000 --> 0:17:25.840 you have the adverse. And obviously in this instance, there 0:17:25.880 --> 0:17:27.679 was nothing to do. You had to speak virtually the 0:17:27.680 --> 0:17:30.399 whole time. But a lot of us can relate to 0:17:30.520 --> 0:17:35.200 maintaining virtual dynamics so just pale in comparison to physical dynamics. 0:17:35.320 --> 0:17:38.439 And I think that's because we're all trained in the 0:17:38.640 --> 0:17:42.280 language and the art of interacting online. When I say 0:17:42.320 --> 0:17:45.080 we all, I'm talking about a certain demographic of internet user, 0:17:45.160 --> 0:17:48.320 dating app user. You know what to say and how 0:17:48.359 --> 0:17:52.520 to appear. And there's something so enticing and addictive and 0:17:52.680 --> 0:17:57.280 don't mean related about text messaging and online interactions. And 0:17:57.320 --> 0:18:00.840 in real life you get the best of the best 0:18:00.840 --> 0:18:02.880 and the worst of the worst. So all the good 0:18:02.880 --> 0:18:07.000 things seeing the way somebody laughs what their voice actually 0:18:07.040 --> 0:18:11.439 sounds like. Holding them going places, it's really exciting. They 0:18:11.480 --> 0:18:13.800 get the worst, the worst. You're like, oh, well, they 0:18:13.880 --> 0:18:16.120 never blow their nose and they're always just sniffling. 0:18:16.480 --> 0:18:18.119 Yuh yeah, that's a bit of me. 0:18:18.280 --> 0:18:22.160 I no oh okay, oh wow, I start a strong lome. 0:18:23.240 --> 0:18:26.919 Or they are always just like touching things when you 0:18:27.000 --> 0:18:31.359 go to shopping centers, and they have no sense of 0:18:31.440 --> 0:18:34.160 spatial awareness, and they're always running into people, and they're 0:18:34.320 --> 0:18:37.679 so loud in restaurants, and you don't catch this online 0:18:37.760 --> 0:18:40.080 and suddenly you're creating a much more clear picture and 0:18:40.119 --> 0:18:42.280 you don't really like what you see in this instance, 0:18:42.320 --> 0:18:45.480 I commend you for recognizing that what you're experiencing now 0:18:45.520 --> 0:18:48.119 is a reverse situation of what other people experience, where 0:18:48.280 --> 0:18:50.080 you know, you're usually the person who's waiting to be 0:18:50.200 --> 0:18:52.919 rejected and this time you've got quote unquote the power. 0:18:53.359 --> 0:18:58.680 But also, like, I think that entertaining someone who's not 0:18:58.800 --> 0:19:02.639 right for you for or impartial reasons, it's just as 0:19:02.640 --> 0:19:04.840 bad as entertaining someone who's not right for you for 0:19:04.880 --> 0:19:07.719 the wrong, wrong reasons. They're taking up space. You need 0:19:07.760 --> 0:19:10.959 to clear up your roster, clear cash clear cookies and 0:19:11.000 --> 0:19:13.560 make space for the real deal. I would I would 0:19:13.640 --> 0:19:15.880 imagine this person would hate to know that the only 0:19:15.880 --> 0:19:18.320 reason why you're keeping them around is because they're not 0:19:18.440 --> 0:19:20.840 quite good enough for you to leave them. 0:19:21.040 --> 0:19:24.119 Oh and I will say as well, maybe like relish 0:19:24.160 --> 0:19:26.920 in the feeling of being on the you're like shoes 0:19:26.960 --> 0:19:29.320 on You're like the shoes on the other foot. I've 0:19:29.359 --> 0:19:31.800 never experienced this. I would take this as a learning 0:19:31.800 --> 0:19:34.359 opportunity to be like all the times that I've been 0:19:34.359 --> 0:19:37.200 on the receiving end, it hasn't really been personal. It's 0:19:37.200 --> 0:19:40.160 been something a third thing that's a secret third thing. 0:19:41.800 --> 0:19:44.480 We got a listeners submission. Wanted to know if they are. 0:19:44.400 --> 0:19:50.080 Rude not the right person to ask. My parameter is 0:19:50.160 --> 0:19:55.880 so off sometimes I feel like I'm being rude, no polite, 0:19:56.480 --> 0:19:59.439 or like there have been moments where I've tried to 0:19:59.480 --> 0:20:02.080 like be the bigger person and not said something because 0:20:02.080 --> 0:20:03.720 I knew I was gonna say something shady. And it's 0:20:03.760 --> 0:20:10.760 come across this me listening intently to you. I see 0:20:10.800 --> 0:20:22.280 the videos, Babe, in my head. I'm like, sometimes Fruits 0:20:22.280 --> 0:20:25.359 will stop talking like is everything occurrent? Like yeah, why? 0:20:25.960 --> 0:20:27.120 And then I see the playback. 0:20:28.160 --> 0:20:31.720 Please continue a flex and frooms. I love your podcast. 0:20:32.400 --> 0:20:34.600 Isn't it considered rude? And they've just gone straight into it? 0:20:34.640 --> 0:20:37.360 I love this. Isn't it considered rude for your date 0:20:37.480 --> 0:20:40.120 or friend or person you're hanging out with to not 0:20:40.320 --> 0:20:43.480 introduce you to whoever they run into. I was just 0:20:43.480 --> 0:20:45.800 starting to date a guy and whenever we run into 0:20:45.800 --> 0:20:48.720 people he knew, he would literally ignore me. Even the 0:20:48.720 --> 0:20:50.520 person he would run into would look me in the 0:20:50.520 --> 0:20:57.360 eyes and not say anything. This was a huge turn 0:20:57.440 --> 0:20:59.880 off for me, and in my opinion, a sign of disrespect. 0:21:00.400 --> 0:21:02.280 He can call me a friend or just say something 0:21:02.320 --> 0:21:06.879 like this is insert name here instead nothing. We're no 0:21:06.920 --> 0:21:12.680 longer dating a upset devil face nice. I'm gonna say 0:21:13.000 --> 0:21:14.639