WEBVTT - FULL SHOW: Gigantic Spiders & Healthy Gossiping?

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<v Speaker 1>A good pickup with Britt Hogley and Laura ben Rady.

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<v Speaker 2>Your worth, our windows done, my world reason the dust

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<v Speaker 2>only good, bab I don't much, but yeah, our.

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<v Speaker 3>Big get and what I want It don't matter where.

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<v Speaker 3>This is the pick up.

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<v Speaker 2>Hi, guys, it's the pick up with Bread Halfley and

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<v Speaker 2>Laura Ben.

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<v Speaker 3>Happy Thursday, one day away from the big V day.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah? Do you know what else?

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<v Speaker 3>It's one day closer towards your husband returning.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm Joe.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel like all I have done for the last

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<v Speaker 1>four weeks is talk about my husband, Matthew Johnson. If

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<v Speaker 1>you're not aware, he's currently in the I'm Celebrity Jungle.

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<v Speaker 2>What is he?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>Did you not know? Go vote on ten play everyone

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<v Speaker 2>to vote.

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<v Speaker 1>He's been away for so long. But also, so I

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<v Speaker 1>live with Matt's mum. Well, actually that's not that you.

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<v Speaker 1>Matt's mum moved in with us about a year ago,

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<v Speaker 1>and so I lived with my mother in law and

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<v Speaker 1>we have had four weeks of just hanging out, the

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<v Speaker 1>two of us with the kids. And recently we were

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<v Speaker 1>chatting and I was like, do you feel like you miss.

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<v Speaker 2>Matt at all?

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<v Speaker 1>And she was like, oh, I don't really miss him.

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<v Speaker 1>She's like, we're having a great time. We have everything

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<v Speaker 1>under control. And I thought that was really cute. I

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<v Speaker 1>thought it was cute that now like Matt's mum and

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<v Speaker 1>I are really we're like bessies.

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<v Speaker 2>We brow down.

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<v Speaker 3>So you've like knuckled him out, nudged you out.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't need him. I'm just raising children alongside my

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<v Speaker 2>mother in law. My husband's gone, he's never coming back.

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<v Speaker 3>You're tried wifing now with his mom.

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<v Speaker 1>No, I'm not tad wife. Actually, to be fair, Ellie

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<v Speaker 1>does the trad wifing. She's she was an angel. I

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<v Speaker 1>come home and dinner is cooked and the cow's been

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<v Speaker 1>milked out.

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<v Speaker 2>I just sit on the couch and I'm like, when's

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<v Speaker 2>it ready?

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<v Speaker 3>Now that's not true. Hey, we have a really big

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<v Speaker 3>show for you coming up. We haven't asked guncut today.

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<v Speaker 3>That I think is very relatable. What do you do

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<v Speaker 3>when you're in the honeymoon phase, like where it's all

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<v Speaker 3>sexy and steamy, you need to go away together on

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<v Speaker 3>a holiday for a couple of weeks and you've only

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<v Speaker 3>got one toilet mate.

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<v Speaker 2>I have a story about that. Oh, I can't wait.

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<v Speaker 2>Something happened to me.

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<v Speaker 1>Funnily enough, we were in Africa, but it was horrifying, horrifying.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, it is time for my favorite segment. This is

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<v Speaker 3>ask gun Cut. We do it every single week on

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<v Speaker 3>our podcast Life on Cup podcast. Were you guys riding?

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<v Speaker 3>Or you call up with your deepest, darkest burning questions

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<v Speaker 3>and we do our best to answer them. Now, in

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<v Speaker 3>the spirit of it being Valentine's Day tomorrow, we thought

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<v Speaker 3>we would do a relationship based question, maybe not so

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<v Speaker 3>romantic because it's about travel and poop. Amy, Beautiful, Amy,

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<v Speaker 3>Welcome to the pickup.

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<v Speaker 4>Thank you guys.

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<v Speaker 2>What's your hia.

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<v Speaker 4>I've been with my partner for fifteen months. We don't

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<v Speaker 4>live together, but we're going to New York next month.

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<v Speaker 4>We're going to be together for almost two weeks, and

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<v Speaker 4>I've never pooed while he's been with me, farted in

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<v Speaker 4>front of him. So I've started to get really anxious

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<v Speaker 4>because the time's coming around really quick, and I don't

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<v Speaker 4>know what to do.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you know what they say, Amy, holidays are all

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<v Speaker 1>about discovering new experiences together, and you guys are going

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<v Speaker 1>to discover that's for sure.

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<v Speaker 3>If seen months is a long time to have been

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<v Speaker 3>holding a poo in I'm actually.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm sure she's been to the toilet in that time.

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<v Speaker 3>Britt No, I'm actually more impressed with the control that

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<v Speaker 3>she's got of her bowels. Like if you're saying, oh,

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<v Speaker 3>I'm just not going to do it while I'm with him,

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<v Speaker 3>I don't have that control, like when it comes for me,

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<v Speaker 3>I just need to go. So that's pretty impressive.

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<v Speaker 2>Amy.

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<v Speaker 1>Have you looked at the accommodation that you guys are

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<v Speaker 1>staying in while you're away, like you know how sometimes

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<v Speaker 1>you can go and it's like a glassroom or a

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<v Speaker 1>glass door, or have you looked at like the circumstances

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<v Speaker 1>of the toilet bathroom area I have.

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<v Speaker 4>It's right outside the bedroom and it's a tiny, tiny apartment.

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<v Speaker 2>Horrify.

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<v Speaker 3>No, I know what to do here. I know what

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<v Speaker 3>to do. I had to travel for many months with

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<v Speaker 3>a partner and it was we weren't together that long.

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<v Speaker 3>You just have to own the fact that everyone poops.

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<v Speaker 3>But this is what you say, Hey, I've got to

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<v Speaker 3>go to the bathroom. Can you put on some music?

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<v Speaker 3>He puts his headphones in, puts his music on. You

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<v Speaker 3>go do your business, because you're only human. He knows

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<v Speaker 3>you've got a poop, or you ask him to leave,

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<v Speaker 3>to leave the apartment. However, many minutes and days.

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<v Speaker 1>Amy, can I tell you a horrifying story which is

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<v Speaker 1>just absolutely not going to make you feel any better,

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<v Speaker 1>but it is relevant. When I had just started dating mad,

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<v Speaker 1>we'd only been together for six months, we traveled over

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<v Speaker 1>to South Africa together for a holiday and we were

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<v Speaker 1>staying in a hotel. And do not ask me why

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<v Speaker 1>they thought that this was a good design concept. But

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<v Speaker 1>the bathroom, the toilet was a glass frosted box.

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<v Speaker 2>Like the whole thing was a glass box.

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<v Speaker 1>Common I had the worst food poisoning I have ever

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<v Speaker 1>had in my entire life. And it hit me at midnight,

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<v Speaker 1>and I was pantless and topless and it was coming

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<v Speaker 1>out both ends, and the poor man had to sit

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<v Speaker 1>in bed and he could just see the outline of

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<v Speaker 1>me in a non contained glass box.

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<v Speaker 2>It was horrifying. And look at us now only upwards

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<v Speaker 2>from there.

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<v Speaker 4>And remember you do love me.

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<v Speaker 2>I was no, do you know what happened?

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, get out, and the poor thing had

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<v Speaker 1>to sit outside in the.

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<v Speaker 2>Dark, in the middle of the mind. It's so funny.

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<v Speaker 3>You just reminded me when I went to the Valdis

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<v Speaker 3>with my fiance Ben. Oh god, instead of being in

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<v Speaker 3>a instead of being in a glass box. The whole

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<v Speaker 3>floor is glass. So if one's on the toilet and

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<v Speaker 3>one just swims underneath the bungalow because it's an over

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<v Speaker 3>one a bungalow, you just look straight up. I'm on

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<v Speaker 3>the toilet benchously scooting pass with snorkel on.

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<v Speaker 1>Who's just signing these holiday houses? Amy, trust us, You're

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<v Speaker 1>going to be fine. And you know what's even better

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<v Speaker 1>than that, it's that you have just won one thousand

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<v Speaker 1>dollars to spend with Jetstar Holidays.

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<v Speaker 4>Oh really, you're so.

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<v Speaker 2>Welcome to upgrade your hotel.

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<v Speaker 3>You hopefully can get one.

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<v Speaker 4>I have to get over the poofia this trip then,

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<v Speaker 4>because yeah, you definitely have to go to be coming

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<v Speaker 4>with me next time.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you know we did.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm sorry, we didn't actually even give you any advice.

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<v Speaker 3>Just own it, everyone, poobs, it's just put some headphones in,

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<v Speaker 3>ask him to go out, but own the fact. Just

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<v Speaker 3>be like, hey, I gotta go the toilet. You me, fine,

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<v Speaker 3>got two options, leave the room or put your headphones in.

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<v Speaker 1>You're gonna be fine, it's gonna make either make or

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<v Speaker 1>break the relationship.

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<v Speaker 2>And I think it's going to be a good thing

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<v Speaker 2>for you guys.

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<v Speaker 4>Oh I hope. So like, yeah, I just have to

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<v Speaker 4>get over it. It's a normal thing, and just yeah,

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<v Speaker 4>remind myself that, Yeah, it's more prins in. That's going

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<v Speaker 4>to be, yeah, the easiest way.

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<v Speaker 3>And a little perfume to spray around after.

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<v Speaker 4>Oh yes, we'll get that some of that beauty.

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<v Speaker 3>Free saying Samy, Okay, I need to give you an

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<v Speaker 3>update on the spider infestation in my house. To cut

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<v Speaker 3>a very complicated long story short, I moved into Laura's

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<v Speaker 3>old apartment now Laura while she was living there, had

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<v Speaker 3>when I say infestation of Huntsman's that's using the term lightly.

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<v Speaker 3>There was one day where like fifty of them crawled

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<v Speaker 3>out from behind your TV, didn't they It.

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<v Speaker 1>Was horrifying, and at that point I was like, I

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<v Speaker 1>will burn this apartment down. No, actually, in fact, I

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<v Speaker 1>will move out, And for.

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<v Speaker 2>Some reason, you were like, I will come and live here.

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<v Speaker 2>This looks great. I'll get a discount.

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<v Speaker 3>So I've been seeing them everywhere I can horrify. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 3>I cannot get rid of them. They've been having sex

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<v Speaker 3>next to my face in bed. No that we talked

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<v Speaker 3>about that on radio a couple of weeks ago.

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<v Speaker 2>Thank you.

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<v Speaker 1>I know it's still burned to my retinas. I don't

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<v Speaker 1>need to revisit it.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, actually we don't know if they were fornicating or

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<v Speaker 3>eating each other. I can't be sure. So anyway, moving forward,

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<v Speaker 3>they've been They're scary when you see them. Last night,

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<v Speaker 3>I was like, went to my bedroom cupboard, was on

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<v Speaker 3>FaceTime to Ben. Opened the door of my cupboard to

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<v Speaker 3>get something out of my clothes really fast. Wasn't paying

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<v Speaker 3>attention to put my hand in there is the biggest

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<v Speaker 3>thing you've ever seen. Look at the size of this.

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<v Speaker 3>It's the size of a dinner plate.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, do you think that's a huntsman?

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<v Speaker 2>Or is that something that'll kill you?

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<v Speaker 3>I'm going to die. It's the biggest thing I've ever seen.

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<v Speaker 3>It doesn't look like any huntsman I've seen. It looks

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<v Speaker 3>like it could be a funnel web. I think it's

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<v Speaker 3>a bird eating spider.

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<v Speaker 2>It's not a burning spider. That's what it is.

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<v Speaker 3>I've absolutely lost the plot. Ben's gone into panic mode now, Ben,

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<v Speaker 3>my fiancee, He's Swiss and he's petrified.

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<v Speaker 2>How did he even know he's on the other side

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<v Speaker 2>of the world.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm on FaceTime to him happy in live. So I

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<v Speaker 3>started screaming and he thought I was being attacked. He's like,

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<v Speaker 3>do I need to call the police? And I'm like,

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<v Speaker 3>maybe maybe we need to burn his house down. Anyway,

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<v Speaker 3>they are going to be people that don't like this.

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<v Speaker 3>But I did kill the spider.

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<v Speaker 2>I can't kill the spider, Brittany or right.

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<v Speaker 3>If that it gets on my face, I'm dead. Look,

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<v Speaker 3>oh okay, next time, I'll call you over to save it.

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<v Speaker 3>How about that?

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<v Speaker 2>I will. I'm very big on getting like a plastic container.

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<v Speaker 1>In your case, it would have had to have been

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<v Speaker 1>a top topwear container big.

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<v Speaker 2>Enough to fit a lamb roast.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm like, I'm very big on like getting a TopWare

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<v Speaker 1>container and sliding the paper underneath and then letting it

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<v Speaker 1>out into the guard.

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<v Speaker 3>Is that what you did with your fifty huntsmen infestation.

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<v Speaker 2>And then they all came back.

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<v Speaker 1>The thing I'm more worried about for you, though, is because,

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<v Speaker 1>like so to set the context, Ben lives overseas.

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<v Speaker 2>He's from a place where the only thing that you

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<v Speaker 2>have his cows like.

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<v Speaker 1>He's not used to being around any type of insects

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<v Speaker 1>or spiders or anything, and understandably so he has a

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<v Speaker 1>deep phobia of it. And so anytime he comes to

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<v Speaker 1>Australia to visit you, Britt, it's his one thing. It's

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<v Speaker 1>his one reason why he says he's not going to

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<v Speaker 1>move here.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh he's petrified anyway. So I woke up this morning

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<v Speaker 3>and bless his soul, my fiancee Ben, He's like, morning, babe,

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<v Speaker 3>I didn't sleep last night and I've spent some time

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<v Speaker 3>doing some research and I was like, what he's like,

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<v Speaker 3>it could be a trapdoor, but I'm not convinced. The

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<v Speaker 3>shape of the body is the same.

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<v Speaker 1>It's not a trap door. It's just a huntsman. So anyway,

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<v Speaker 1>really big one that eats people. He's the one that

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<v Speaker 1>has lost sleep.

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<v Speaker 2>I went to bed. I was fine.

0:09:19.480 --> 0:09:22.120
<v Speaker 3>He's like, I've contacted a wildlife specialist and I was like,

0:09:22.200 --> 0:09:26.080
<v Speaker 3>surely this is a joke. So two years ago Ben

0:09:26.160 --> 0:09:30.000
<v Speaker 3>in Australia met out a friend of the pickup. He's

0:09:30.040 --> 0:09:33.040
<v Speaker 3>a wildlife specialist from a sanctuary. His name is also Ben.

0:09:33.440 --> 0:09:35.600
<v Speaker 3>Fiance Ben met wildlife.

0:09:35.040 --> 0:09:37.840
<v Speaker 1>Ben and they became best Ben's and they're best friends.

0:09:38.360 --> 0:09:40.760
<v Speaker 3>Now they're Ben and Ben are best friends, and so

0:09:41.520 --> 0:09:44.199
<v Speaker 3>my fiancee Ben contacted in the middle of the night

0:09:44.320 --> 0:09:48.120
<v Speaker 3>contacted Wildlife Ben. He sent him the photo and I

0:09:48.200 --> 0:09:50.520
<v Speaker 3>was like, what do you mean you've contacted wildlife Ben.

0:09:50.600 --> 0:09:52.960
<v Speaker 3>I was so embarrassed, and he goes, Hi, Ben, I

0:09:53.000 --> 0:09:55.839
<v Speaker 3>hope you've been well. Quick question what the hell is this?

0:09:56.040 --> 0:09:59.720
<v Speaker 3>He sends him the photo. Wildlife Ben says, ha ha,

0:10:00.000 --> 0:10:01.840
<v Speaker 3>oh my god, don't worry. I think it's just a

0:10:01.880 --> 0:10:05.280
<v Speaker 3>massive huntsman. Not dangerous, but not something you want in

0:10:05.280 --> 0:10:07.880
<v Speaker 3>your closet. My fiance Ben said, I don't want to

0:10:07.960 --> 0:10:10.640
<v Speaker 3>question your expertise. I believe you, believe you are very

0:10:10.640 --> 0:10:12.800
<v Speaker 3>well trained, but that is bigger than anything I have

0:10:12.880 --> 0:10:15.559
<v Speaker 3>ever seen. I don't think that's a huntsman. So now

0:10:15.760 --> 0:10:18.520
<v Speaker 3>my Ben is questioning wildlife Ben's specialty.

0:10:18.600 --> 0:10:20.960
<v Speaker 2>I think he should just yeah give up at this point.

0:10:21.080 --> 0:10:24.320
<v Speaker 3>Well, Wildlife Ben has said that it is so big,

0:10:25.240 --> 0:10:27.280
<v Speaker 3>like the biggest thing you've ever seen, that he's pretty

0:10:27.280 --> 0:10:29.280
<v Speaker 3>sure it's been living in there with a family and

0:10:29.360 --> 0:10:32.520
<v Speaker 3>now it has had babies. What do I do? My

0:10:32.559 --> 0:10:34.600
<v Speaker 3>whole wardrobe has baby huntsmens through it.

0:10:34.600 --> 0:10:36.160
<v Speaker 2>It's time to burn it down and move now.

0:10:36.240 --> 0:10:37.320
<v Speaker 3>I'm serious.

0:10:37.440 --> 0:10:43.000
<v Speaker 1>Sorry, it's only options. I have burned my homeless everyone.

0:10:43.080 --> 0:10:44.520
<v Speaker 1>That's gonna be the next Daily Mail headline.

0:10:44.559 --> 0:10:47.559
<v Speaker 3>Because do you know how spiders have babies? They don't

0:10:47.559 --> 0:10:50.720
<v Speaker 3>have one baby. They hatch like a hundred eggs, and

0:10:50.760 --> 0:10:53.280
<v Speaker 3>then all the babies grow on their back and then

0:10:53.320 --> 0:10:54.880
<v Speaker 3>they climb out into the wardrobe.

0:10:54.920 --> 0:10:55.880
<v Speaker 2>They grow on their back.

0:10:56.080 --> 0:10:58.360
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, yeah, they run off their back. They live on

0:10:58.400 --> 0:11:00.800
<v Speaker 3>their back. I think I think that's true.

0:11:00.800 --> 0:11:02.839
<v Speaker 2>This sounds horrifying. Also this, do you know what?

0:11:02.840 --> 0:11:04.560
<v Speaker 1>We need to make a new segment of all of

0:11:04.559 --> 0:11:07.440
<v Speaker 1>the absolutely made up facts that Brittany comes up with.

0:11:08.240 --> 0:11:09.119
<v Speaker 2>So it's truth.

0:11:09.000 --> 0:11:12.040
<v Speaker 3>Grace produce to Grace. Spiders carry their babies on their backs.

0:11:12.520 --> 0:11:14.680
<v Speaker 2>They don't. They absolutely don't.

0:11:14.760 --> 0:11:16.520
<v Speaker 3>Brute no, they do. I'm googling it.

0:11:16.600 --> 0:11:20.199
<v Speaker 2>Now, that's like a dark you're thinking of darks. So, bro,

0:11:20.800 --> 0:11:21.440
<v Speaker 2>look at this.

0:11:21.679 --> 0:11:26.959
<v Speaker 3>That's a wolf spider. That's not sorry, there is a

0:11:27.160 --> 0:11:29.040
<v Speaker 3>hundred spiders on this spider's back.

0:11:29.120 --> 0:11:31.400
<v Speaker 1>Please stop showing everyone in the studio trying to solicit

0:11:31.440 --> 0:11:32.000
<v Speaker 1>support for this.

0:11:32.600 --> 0:11:33.880
<v Speaker 3>That's making me feel on well all.

0:11:33.840 --> 0:11:35.720
<v Speaker 1>Right, well, look, it's currently homeless if you have a

0:11:35.720 --> 0:11:37.880
<v Speaker 1>place for her to live, she would really appreciate.

0:11:37.920 --> 0:11:39.080
<v Speaker 2>You can send it into the pick up.

0:11:40.800 --> 0:11:43.199
<v Speaker 1>Now, there was a research study that came out recently

0:11:43.200 --> 0:11:44.920
<v Speaker 1>and an article which I read on The Guardian. I

0:11:44.920 --> 0:11:49.559
<v Speaker 1>found this so interesting. So it turns out that on average,

0:11:49.960 --> 0:11:55.120
<v Speaker 1>everybody spends one hour a day gossiping. And apparently everyone

0:11:55.240 --> 0:11:57.600
<v Speaker 1>does it because I believe that, yeah, I do too,

0:11:57.679 --> 0:12:00.280
<v Speaker 1>but also that whole adage that like gossip thing is

0:12:00.320 --> 0:12:02.760
<v Speaker 1>only for small minds, which I would love to believe

0:12:02.760 --> 0:12:04.240
<v Speaker 1>that we're all above it, but I think we all

0:12:04.240 --> 0:12:05.240
<v Speaker 1>do it in different ways.

0:12:06.280 --> 0:12:07.600
<v Speaker 3>I think the thing is I do not know one

0:12:07.640 --> 0:12:09.360
<v Speaker 3>person that doesn't gossip. But I think the thing is

0:12:09.400 --> 0:12:12.839
<v Speaker 3>people don't think that they gossip, and they cover it

0:12:12.880 --> 0:12:15.520
<v Speaker 3>as like their fane. It's concerned. They're like, I'm just

0:12:15.640 --> 0:12:18.080
<v Speaker 3>telling you this because I'm so concerned about this person.

0:12:18.200 --> 0:12:21.920
<v Speaker 3>Like people put this cape over gossip because it's got

0:12:21.920 --> 0:12:25.240
<v Speaker 3>such a negative connotation. But everyone does it. It's just

0:12:25.280 --> 0:12:27.640
<v Speaker 3>how you deliver it, and different people do it in

0:12:27.640 --> 0:12:30.640
<v Speaker 3>different ways. Like they can be like high end, top notch.

0:12:30.679 --> 0:12:33.160
<v Speaker 2>Positive end gossip, positive gossip, or there.

0:12:33.080 --> 0:12:35.000
<v Speaker 3>Can be you just being like an absolute mole.

0:12:35.440 --> 0:12:38.360
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but also I mean, I find this interesting because

0:12:38.360 --> 0:12:41.000
<v Speaker 1>it's something that is very very gendered, and I think

0:12:41.080 --> 0:12:44.440
<v Speaker 1>women we have kind of bore the brunt of being

0:12:44.679 --> 0:12:47.480
<v Speaker 1>the gender that does the gossiping. But I would debate

0:12:47.640 --> 0:12:50.440
<v Speaker 1>that just as much as like maybe we talk about friends,

0:12:50.559 --> 0:12:52.480
<v Speaker 1>or we talk about families, or we talk about dating,

0:12:52.559 --> 0:12:55.439
<v Speaker 1>like we're probably more social gossipers in that way. Sometimes,

0:12:55.720 --> 0:12:58.000
<v Speaker 1>like I would say that men do it equally as much.

0:12:58.240 --> 0:13:01.360
<v Speaker 1>Maybe it's not about the same things necessarily, but they

0:13:01.400 --> 0:13:04.440
<v Speaker 1>do it within their groups, around the girls that they're dating,

0:13:04.679 --> 0:13:07.360
<v Speaker 1>or around what's happening at work, or what's happening with

0:13:07.400 --> 0:13:09.720
<v Speaker 1>their bosses or their employers, like we all do it

0:13:09.760 --> 0:13:12.200
<v Speaker 1>to some extent. The thing that was interesting about this

0:13:12.320 --> 0:13:14.840
<v Speaker 1>article was that it is like how you do it

0:13:14.880 --> 0:13:16.920
<v Speaker 1>as to whether it can be a positive thing or

0:13:16.920 --> 0:13:19.600
<v Speaker 1>a negative thing, because it actually is something that can

0:13:19.679 --> 0:13:24.160
<v Speaker 1>bind relationships, it's something that can create connectedness, but you

0:13:24.240 --> 0:13:25.560
<v Speaker 1>have to do it in a way where you're not

0:13:25.679 --> 0:13:27.559
<v Speaker 1>just like going out there and using it like a

0:13:27.600 --> 0:13:30.760
<v Speaker 1>spattergarten to absolutely derail and put down the people that

0:13:30.800 --> 0:13:31.520
<v Speaker 1>you're talking about.

0:13:31.640 --> 0:13:33.840
<v Speaker 3>It's so funny that you say that, like men gossip

0:13:33.840 --> 0:13:36.719
<v Speaker 3>as well. I have in the last years since I've

0:13:36.760 --> 0:13:38.720
<v Speaker 3>been on my health journey and I'm really on the

0:13:38.760 --> 0:13:42.240
<v Speaker 3>sauna train. I cannot tell you the gossip that goes

0:13:42.280 --> 0:13:45.079
<v Speaker 3>on in those saunas by men. So I'll sometimes sit

0:13:45.120 --> 0:13:47.120
<v Speaker 3>in the corner, because it's like a unisex sauna, right,

0:13:47.320 --> 0:13:49.240
<v Speaker 3>I'll go in with my headphones in and I'll sit

0:13:49.280 --> 0:13:52.560
<v Speaker 3>in the corner. Men will come in like friends. I mean,

0:13:52.600 --> 0:13:54.160
<v Speaker 3>they think that I've got my headphones in. I do,

0:13:54.360 --> 0:13:57.080
<v Speaker 3>but sometimes I press pause on what I'm playing and

0:13:57.120 --> 0:13:59.640
<v Speaker 3>I just listen to their gossip. Their version is like

0:14:00.559 --> 0:14:02.920
<v Speaker 3>talking about someone that didn't do the workout properly, or

0:14:02.920 --> 0:14:05.440
<v Speaker 3>like do you see he definitely like he definitely skipped

0:14:05.440 --> 0:14:07.360
<v Speaker 3>his reps, or like he said he was going to

0:14:07.400 --> 0:14:09.160
<v Speaker 3>this competition. I was like, he's never gonna do well there.

0:14:09.200 --> 0:14:11.280
<v Speaker 3>He shouldn't be like things like that. They're talking about

0:14:11.280 --> 0:14:14.440
<v Speaker 3>girls they're dating, they're talking about like it's wild. But

0:14:14.520 --> 0:14:16.840
<v Speaker 3>one hundred percent men gossip just as much, but I

0:14:16.840 --> 0:14:18.280
<v Speaker 3>think they deliver it differently.

0:14:18.960 --> 0:14:20.520
<v Speaker 1>Maybe it's not even the way that deliver it's also

0:14:20.640 --> 0:14:22.880
<v Speaker 1>just like the perception around it, like it's not seen.

0:14:23.160 --> 0:14:25.280
<v Speaker 1>Maybe it's because we don't label it that way. One

0:14:25.320 --> 0:14:27.320
<v Speaker 1>of the things that was raised, which I thought was

0:14:27.360 --> 0:14:30.400
<v Speaker 1>really fascinating, is that gossip has a greater currency for women,

0:14:30.480 --> 0:14:33.600
<v Speaker 1>so like in the past and like historically it has

0:14:33.680 --> 0:14:36.200
<v Speaker 1>been a useful tool to help to protect us. Maybe

0:14:36.240 --> 0:14:38.560
<v Speaker 1>we talk about the men that are not, you know,

0:14:38.880 --> 0:14:41.720
<v Speaker 1>trustworthy or right to be dating, or talk about different

0:14:41.760 --> 0:14:44.080
<v Speaker 1>things that are happening that are relationship based. I think

0:14:44.120 --> 0:14:47.080
<v Speaker 1>that that's kind of what we do as women, where

0:14:47.120 --> 0:14:50.080
<v Speaker 1>we really sort of focus on relationship talk and how

0:14:50.160 --> 0:14:53.000
<v Speaker 1>like we're connected to the people around us. I don't know,

0:14:53.080 --> 0:14:55.720
<v Speaker 1>I find it fascinating because I'm like, we always give

0:14:55.760 --> 0:14:58.080
<v Speaker 1>it a very bad rap, and we all know that

0:14:58.120 --> 0:15:01.160
<v Speaker 1>one person who's like the office gossip the gossip friend

0:15:01.560 --> 0:15:04.760
<v Speaker 1>who kind of just shares their business with everyone, like

0:15:04.840 --> 0:15:07.000
<v Speaker 1>they don't have any filter when it comes to who

0:15:07.000 --> 0:15:08.680
<v Speaker 1>they share it with. They'll share it with anyone, and

0:15:08.720 --> 0:15:12.280
<v Speaker 1>they will speak badly about people without really considering the consequences.

0:15:12.600 --> 0:15:14.320
<v Speaker 1>And the flip side of this is that they're saying,

0:15:14.560 --> 0:15:17.000
<v Speaker 1>if you're going to talk and you're gonna gossip, also

0:15:17.040 --> 0:15:20.880
<v Speaker 1>be very mindful about doing the opposite of that, which

0:15:20.920 --> 0:15:23.120
<v Speaker 1>is like sharing the good things about people too. So

0:15:23.200 --> 0:15:26.240
<v Speaker 1>even though gossiping can be a negative aspect, making sure

0:15:26.240 --> 0:15:28.320
<v Speaker 1>that when you're doing it, you're also gossiping about the

0:15:28.320 --> 0:15:29.680
<v Speaker 1>good and the people as well well.

0:15:29.720 --> 0:15:34.200
<v Speaker 3>A professor at Durham University, Maria Kakaka She says that

0:15:34.320 --> 0:15:37.520
<v Speaker 3>you yes, she did, Yes she did, Kakaika, she knows

0:15:37.520 --> 0:15:39.440
<v Speaker 3>what's up. She said that you need to start practicing

0:15:39.560 --> 0:15:42.640
<v Speaker 3>positive gossip, which I think is amazing, but I think

0:15:42.640 --> 0:15:46.080
<v Speaker 3>it's way harder to do. Positive gossip is complementing people

0:15:46.160 --> 0:15:49.040
<v Speaker 3>behind their backs or recounting their good deeds to someone else,

0:15:49.240 --> 0:15:52.840
<v Speaker 3>which I think is really important. But as humans, we're

0:15:52.880 --> 0:15:55.360
<v Speaker 3>more trained to negatively gear well, we're more trained to

0:15:55.360 --> 0:15:57.840
<v Speaker 3>want to vent and get something off our chest. It's

0:15:57.880 --> 0:15:59.960
<v Speaker 3>like the same as you leave a review for a restaurant.

0:16:00.120 --> 0:16:01.880
<v Speaker 3>You want to go and leave the negative review, but

0:16:01.920 --> 0:16:03.680
<v Speaker 3>you don't leave and think I'm going to go and

0:16:03.720 --> 0:16:06.040
<v Speaker 3>write like that pastor was the best pastor I've eaten.

0:16:06.120 --> 0:16:09.360
<v Speaker 1>I think that complaining really connects people as well, because

0:16:09.400 --> 0:16:11.440
<v Speaker 1>you have like a common enemy to bondover.

0:16:11.640 --> 0:16:13.680
<v Speaker 3>It's the same thing in relationships. Right when you want

0:16:13.680 --> 0:16:16.440
<v Speaker 3>to go invent to your friends, you'll talk about the argument.

0:16:17.000 --> 0:16:18.360
<v Speaker 2>But he or bet he's not he's great.

0:16:18.440 --> 0:16:21.000
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and you don't often say such and such did

0:16:21.040 --> 0:16:22.920
<v Speaker 3>this for me last night? Isn't he the best? Because

0:16:22.960 --> 0:16:24.120
<v Speaker 3>you like people don't want to hear that.

0:16:24.320 --> 0:16:26.320
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, totally agree. Well, fascinated.

0:16:26.320 --> 0:16:28.800
<v Speaker 1>Anyway, you're all going to gossip anyway statistically, so why

0:16:28.800 --> 0:16:30.280
<v Speaker 1>don't you try and do some good gossip as well.

0:16:30.280 --> 0:16:31.960
<v Speaker 3>So if you're going to talk about us right now

0:16:32.120 --> 0:16:34.600
<v Speaker 3>on this, please make it great. Well, that's it from us,

0:16:34.680 --> 0:16:35.200
<v Speaker 3>Should we go.

0:16:35.360 --> 0:16:36.320
<v Speaker 2>That's the end of the show.

0:16:36.360 --> 0:16:36.720
<v Speaker 3>Guys,