Speaker 1: If you close your eyes and visualize what you want
Speaker 1: your life to look like, what does it look like
Speaker 1: once you've achieved your highest goals. Maybe you're pioneering women's
Speaker 1: sport or perhaps center boxing match with Nick cumm as
Speaker 1: the Honey Badger o case. So maybe they're not your goals,
Speaker 1: but there is someone who has achieved all of this
Speaker 1: after mastering the art of visualization. She joins us next
Speaker 1: to help you not only visualize your goals, but achieve them.
Speaker 1: And after that we're tackling temptations.
Speaker 2: I'm in a situation where I'm trying to make healthy
Speaker 2: eating choices. However, I live in a household with the
Speaker 2: family member that is John food addict and one who
Speaker 2: just loves to beat a variety of goodies every day.
Speaker 2: How do I go about living in an environment with
Speaker 2: so many time patients.
Speaker 1: I'll get to that question just a little later on
Speaker 1: the show. I'm Sam Wood. This is the Wood Life,
Speaker 1: real people, real questions, real life. Now it's time to
Speaker 1: get in to visualization.
Speaker 3: Now.
Speaker 1: Usually when I have a guest in the studio, I
Speaker 1: know exactly what we're going to talk about. But my
Speaker 1: next guest, we could honestly have an enthralling conversation about
Speaker 1: a number of topics. I want to ask this person
Speaker 1: about being a role model to so many young girls
Speaker 1: and AFLW superstar sas Superstar Now podcast host Welcome to
Speaker 1: the wood Life, Sabrina Frederick. How are you?
Speaker 4: I'm very well And what an intro?
Speaker 1: What an intro?
Speaker 2: That's true?
Speaker 1: I mean even you know, I'm not a huge guy
Speaker 1: for prep. I'll be really honest with.
Speaker 4: Has been hours and hours prepping at Joe.
Speaker 1: But I mean that you've done so much and to
Speaker 1: be honest, it really feels like you're just getting started.
Speaker 1: I mean, at the peak of your AFLW career, absolute
Speaker 1: superstar of the game, such a recognizable figure. And you know,
Speaker 1: I'm a father of soon to be four daughters. And
Speaker 1: something we have in common is your wife is pregnant
Speaker 1: as well.
Speaker 3: Yes, there's a lot of this, a lot going on
Speaker 3: in my world at the moment. Wouldn't I wouldn't change it.
Speaker 3: And I think that all those things they encompass who
Speaker 3: you are, and they challenge you, and they push you
Speaker 3: in a direction where you probably never would have thought
Speaker 3: you would have ended up. And even just the few
Speaker 3: things you've said there, you know, ten years ago, I
Speaker 3: would have said, who knows where I would have been
Speaker 3: so be able to reflect like that and see what
Speaker 3: I've been able to manage to do. And I'm so
Speaker 3: excited for the future and to become a parent, something
Speaker 3: I've always wanted to do. And they say that being
Speaker 3: a parent it changes you. So I really can't wait
Speaker 3: for that next chapter of life. And I can't complain.
Speaker 3: It's been a few crazy years, but I've learned so much.
Speaker 1: You're obviously a big mindset person, and I also know
Speaker 1: you're a big visualization person, and I wanted to just
Speaker 1: go there for a little minute because you're a big,
Speaker 1: big believer in it. Can you talk us through a
Speaker 1: little bit what you do from a visualization perspective, first
Speaker 1: of all, from an AFLW standpoint, and then I'd love
Speaker 1: to know does it transition into other areas of your life.
Speaker 1: There's a two prong question for you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean it is a big one. I think
Speaker 3: more and more people are getting into it and realizing
Speaker 3: the power of it. I think visualization for me personally,
Speaker 3: is more about seeing yourself somewhere, which then instills belief
Speaker 3: that you can actually be in that environment. I don't
Speaker 3: necessarily think that it's painting an exact picture of what
Speaker 3: you want to happen, because things change all the time.
Speaker 3: For me, it's more about what am I feeling, what
Speaker 3: am I doing when I'm my best. So in terms
Speaker 3: of a football game, it's being around my teammates and
Speaker 3: if I can envision getting around them and goals being
Speaker 3: scored and me being in the middle of it and
Speaker 3: them being around me. It's that feeling that I get
Speaker 3: from the sport that I visualize and the passages of
Speaker 3: play that sort of get me there. I think sometimes
Speaker 3: people mistake visualization for playing out a game in your
Speaker 3: head a thousand times over in different scenarios. That's completely different,
Speaker 3: and to be honest, that would probably really exhaust me.
Speaker 3: Pay out a game a thousand times before I've even
Speaker 3: played it. It's more just visualizing those moments. I guess
Speaker 3: going back to you why of why you do things
Speaker 3: is for me, the reason why I play football is
Speaker 3: the love of the sport, but also the connection to
Speaker 3: my teammates. So me playing at my best is me
Speaker 3: in those environments, and when I go out onto the
Speaker 3: ground before games, I really do try and envision myself
Speaker 3: in certain parts of the ground in those moments, and
Speaker 3: then it's crazy when it unfolds in some circumstances and
Speaker 3: you just think, wow, Like a couple hours ag I
Speaker 3: was really thinking that, and that really unfolded and instills
Speaker 3: that belief that it's in you to get to that point.
Speaker 3: In terms of translating that out of football into the
Speaker 3: rest of my life, I'm a huge believer in visualizing
Speaker 3: what you want for your life. I think that football
Speaker 3: is just a part of me. It doesn't define me.
Speaker 3: It's just something that I do and it makes me
Speaker 3: a better person. But even coming back to, you know,
Speaker 3: being a parent. More recently, I've been visualizing my first
Speaker 3: moments with her when she's born, or my first moments
Speaker 3: of when she can run around? What am I going
Speaker 3: to be doing? Am I gonna be out there and
Speaker 3: full of energy and sort of living out those moments
Speaker 3: as well? So I think it can. It definitely can
Speaker 3: translate into different parts of your life. And I know
Speaker 3: a lot of people are sort of like, is this magical.
Speaker 4: Oh yes, spooky, spiritual, whatever you want to call it.
Speaker 3: But I think it's more just that stuff that makes
Speaker 3: you feel good. Why would you not want to feel
Speaker 3: that before it's happened. So I think it's more just
Speaker 3: living out those moments that make you feel good, instilling
Speaker 3: belief that you can achieve those things, and then you know,
Speaker 3: if it happens, it happens.
Speaker 4: But for me, it's worked.
Speaker 1: So it's similar to what is happening to the contemporary
Speaker 1: version of meditation, Like people who have now worked out
Speaker 1: you can meditate in a myriad of ways. You've got
Speaker 1: to find the right form of meditation to you. And
Speaker 1: you know, you see visualization and it absolutely works, but
Speaker 1: it'd be different for every person. Yeah, everyone has their
Speaker 1: own interpretation of it and it has to feel right.
Speaker 1: If you're cynical about it or you're skeptical about it,
Speaker 1: it's never going to break through.
Speaker 3: Well no, because then it becomes it's becoming a force thing,
Speaker 3: and you never want it to be forced, especially visualization,
Speaker 3: because that whole process is filled with emotion and I
Speaker 3: guess passion and that feeling of what success means for you,
Speaker 3: And I think if it becomes a chore, then you're
Speaker 3: almost doing the complete opposite of what that feeling trying
Speaker 3: to achieve. So, yeah, like you said, is it is
Speaker 3: basically a form of meditation because you're taking time away
Speaker 3: from reality and giving time to yourself. And I think
Speaker 3: every single person has a right to mess with it
Speaker 3: and sort of figure out what is the best for them,
Speaker 3: because in the end the day, that's the person that
Speaker 3: you want it to work for. So no everyone can
Speaker 3: sit cross legged for twenty minutes and meditate, no noise
Speaker 3: or whatever.
Speaker 4: You know, I don't even think I could do that.
Speaker 3: I think for me, I've tried different practices and over time,
Speaker 3: and trying is the big key thing here is you
Speaker 3: don't know until you try. So even for you, like
Speaker 3: you said, you've never really gotten into visualization, but.
Speaker 1: You know what I have, I just haven't realized it
Speaker 1: hasn't been a conscious practice. Yeah it's been. I do
Speaker 1: it with business, and I do it with family, yeah,
Speaker 1: and perhaps not. You know, we don't have a game everything.
Speaker 4: It's your life.
Speaker 1: I don't have a game with my family, Yeah, game
Speaker 1: every weekend. Perhaps don't do it on those sides like that.
Speaker 1: When you do it for footy, is it the same
Speaker 1: amount of time? Is it? Do you have a particular
Speaker 1: like do you have to give yourself in a particular state?
Speaker 1: Do you do it just pregame? Do you do it
Speaker 1: the night before?
Speaker 3: In terms of pregame, I do do it normally when
Speaker 3: I walk out onto the ground because we will get
Speaker 3: there a couple of hours before the game. So my
Speaker 3: initial period of walking out into a ground, I will
Speaker 3: always have a moment to myself. So I do that
Speaker 3: every single game. But then it's sort of free flowing.
Speaker 3: Like the night before. There's sometimes where I really can't
Speaker 3: sleep or whatever, and I'll just tap into that. I'll
Speaker 3: just sit there, eyes closed and just visualize something. Or
Speaker 3: you know, there might just be something that triggers you,
Speaker 3: and like I might be watching a game and a
Speaker 3: moment might happen and I'm thinking, I just want.
Speaker 1: To another game.
Speaker 3: Yeah no, no, no, that was last week. I'll be
Speaker 3: watching a game and I will see something happen in
Speaker 3: the game and I'll think, like it's triggered me in
Speaker 3: the feeling of playing, and I just think, I just
Speaker 3: want to harness that for a moment. I just want
Speaker 3: to take that moment how I'm feeling watching that and
Speaker 3: translate that into how I'm playing. To be honest, if
Speaker 3: I'd turn up to a game and I didn't feel
Speaker 3: like doing it, I wouldn't do it like coming back
Speaker 3: to that chore thing. I'd never want it to feel
Speaker 3: like I have to do something to achieve something, because
Speaker 3: for me, that's the whole point.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that. I mean, the WOODLOFE would like
Speaker 1: to sort of bring things back to how can we
Speaker 1: help every day people that perhaps not playing sport at
Speaker 1: the rest delete level. And I think from a weight
Speaker 1: loss perspective, you know, so many people that I work with,
Speaker 1: I can't even remember the last time they're in good
Speaker 1: shape because perhaps been on this weight loss roller coaster
Speaker 1: for two or three decades, and every time they lose
Speaker 1: a little bit of self belief and it gets a
Speaker 1: little bit tougher, a little bit tougher, and it would
Speaker 1: be very hard for them to even picture what a
Speaker 1: healthier or fit or lean or whatever it might be
Speaker 1: versus themself might be. So I think visualization could be
Speaker 1: a really powerful tool for them to sort of say,
Speaker 1: this is the happiness that it brings, or a feeling
Speaker 1: of satisfaction and pride that it brings when I achieve
Speaker 1: certain goals. This is how it feels when I feel good,
Speaker 1: And you know, I've got a bit of spring in
Speaker 1: my step and a bit of body, confidence back and
Speaker 1: all that kind of stuff. So I think that could
Speaker 1: be really like you say, just try it.
Speaker 3: What you said there is massive that feeling of living
Speaker 3: the healthy life style. I think that when you're on
Speaker 3: that weight loss journey, and some people might not remember
Speaker 3: what they were like at the fittest or whatever they
Speaker 3: may be, it's sort of visualizing why you're doing it.
Speaker 3: You know, say it's because you want to be more
Speaker 3: active with your kids, right, visualizing you being outside with
Speaker 3: the kids in that moment, what that weight loss is
Speaker 3: going to bring to your life.
Speaker 4: That's where the visualization comes in.
Speaker 3: Because if you have moments where you're having a bad
Speaker 3: day or you can't be bother getting out of bed,
Speaker 3: that is a prime example where you think about and
Speaker 3: you fast forward to why you're actually on this process
Speaker 3: and feel it, feel the emotion of how amazing that
Speaker 3: scenario would be running around with your kids, like that's
Speaker 3: the driving force.
Speaker 4: So that's just one example.
Speaker 1: We're on the same page. Find you why, and then
Speaker 1: if you can visualize what that why brings to the
Speaker 1: forefront of your mind, so that every time you're having
Speaker 1: you know you've got that fork in the road moment.
Speaker 1: Can I be bothered doing this work. I do it
Speaker 1: to sit on the couch, or do I eat that
Speaker 1: or do I eat this? You find it, it's there.
Speaker 1: You can feel like you can reach out and touch
Speaker 1: it when you need it the most. You also meditate, Yes,
Speaker 1: I'd love to hear how an elite athlete like you
Speaker 1: us as meditation to use it for relaxation. Do you
Speaker 1: use it for as part of your visualization? Do you
Speaker 1: use it for recovery?
Speaker 3: In terms of the sports specific side, there are so
Speaker 3: many times as an athlete where coming back to playing
Speaker 3: out a game a thousand times in your head, you
Speaker 3: do get that before games, You'll be lying in bed
Speaker 3: when you have a big game the next day and
Speaker 3: you just can't sleep because you are replaying moment after
Speaker 3: moment what I'm going to do here and here and
Speaker 3: in that instance when I just want to quiet my
Speaker 3: mind and try and get some sleep, I use meditation
Speaker 3: a lot because when my brain is just going crazy,
Speaker 3: I just need a moment to just silence everything, calm
Speaker 3: down and relax. So that's one instance where I use
Speaker 3: it a lot if I can't get to sleep before
Speaker 3: a game, and it almost always works. In terms of
Speaker 3: everyday life. I used to do it every single day,
Speaker 3: but I realized like I was really doing it as
Speaker 3: like a chore thing. And now for me, it's a
Speaker 3: couple of times a week when I feel like I
Speaker 3: just have to have some me time, and that's worked
Speaker 3: way better for me personally. But I also have friends
Speaker 3: that do do it every single day and that works
Speaker 3: for them too. So it's coming back to what is
Speaker 3: the best fit for you. But it's just time where
Speaker 3: your mind's not going crazy, because unless you're sleeping, your
Speaker 3: mind's always working, you know what I mean. So meditations
Speaker 3: are only time where you can really focus on quieting
Speaker 3: your mind, just giving it a break. And it's crazy
Speaker 3: what a couple of minutes can actually do to freshen
Speaker 3: you up.
Speaker 1: Love it all right, So let's change tact a little bit.
Speaker 1: You know, pioneer in a very fast growing sport, but
Speaker 1: it's got a long way to go before it gets
Speaker 1: to anywhere near the profile of the male AFL game
Speaker 1: is what is your thoughts on how far it's come
Speaker 1: in the short time that's been around. Where do you
Speaker 1: hope that it gets to? What part of that do
Speaker 1: you want to play and what do you say to
Speaker 1: those people out there that say, perhaps AFLW doesn't it.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm not one of those people, by the way,
Speaker 1: but I'm sure, sure, I'm sure, I'm sure you do
Speaker 1: still here?
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, all the time. And in terms of the game,
Speaker 4: seven years.
Speaker 3: Ago, I never thought that I would be playing elite football,
Speaker 3: you know, as a woman. And here we are six
Speaker 3: years later and the game has grown ridiculously. And the
Speaker 3: reason why I'm so proud is because we've done that
Speaker 3: off the back of not much resourcing. And I know
Speaker 3: a lot of people will say the AFL put a
Speaker 3: lot of money in, which they did, but in terms
Speaker 3: of getting the amount of clubs off the ground and
Speaker 3: players playing at this elite level, we managed to do
Speaker 3: that with in my eyes, not much, which is amazing
Speaker 3: to think because I can't wait to see what the
Speaker 3: future brings, knowing that the backing is going.
Speaker 4: To get more and more and more.
Speaker 3: When I started playing, when I was really, really young,
Speaker 3: I was the only girl in my football team, the
Speaker 3: only girl in my football club, the whole club. To
Speaker 3: now there's kids playing, there's a whole pathway from Ozki
Speaker 3: all the way through. Now that is community changing, and
Speaker 3: to know that it's managed to grow in the space
Speaker 3: of six years, Like six years isn't that long. We're
Speaker 3: competing at such a level that I'm proud to say,
Speaker 3: you know, there are people that come down to the
Speaker 3: games and they're just in awe and seeing young girls
Speaker 3: on the sideline and knowing that that's in their future
Speaker 3: is so amazing, and now also going to be a
Speaker 3: mum soon, knowing that that's going to be an option
Speaker 3: of her if she wants to go down that path.
Speaker 4: I'm so proud to be a part.
Speaker 3: Of that because it comes with the ups and downs
Speaker 3: of being the first and a lot of growing pains,
Speaker 3: and a lot of people thinking that we don't deserve
Speaker 3: to play, which I find is crazy because if any sport,
Speaker 3: this is Australia's code, And how can you have Australia's
Speaker 3: code with only fifty percent of the population playing it.
Speaker 3: I just find that insane. I've always felt that crazy
Speaker 3: because I wasn't born here. I was born in the UK,
Speaker 3: and over there I played soccer and women have always
Speaker 3: been able to play. And moving over to this country
Speaker 3: where it's Australia's code, but then fifty percent of the
Speaker 3: population is it represented. Was always the craziest thing.
Speaker 1: So what do you think the biggest mental hurdle for
Speaker 1: people to get their head around is? Do you think
Speaker 1: it's people don't like change and it's never been that way,
Speaker 1: so it's just too hard for them to get their
Speaker 1: head around and accepted.
Speaker 2: Do you think.
Speaker 3: Yeah, Honestly, even though people have opinions that irk me.
Speaker 3: I think everyone has the right to have their opinion.
Speaker 3: But my issue is when I question those and I say,
Speaker 3: but why do you feel that way? A lot of
Speaker 3: those people actually don't have answers, and that comes back
Speaker 3: to just they don't like change. I think at the start,
Speaker 3: when I first got into the league, I was so
Speaker 3: interested in just changing everyone's minds and no, we deserve
Speaker 3: to be here and plant the flag in the ground.
Speaker 3: And I realized, like, there's no point putting the energy
Speaker 3: into those people because they're on their own journey. I'd
Speaker 3: rather put energy into the people that need to be inspired.
Speaker 3: That are you know, the young girls or even the
Speaker 3: young boys that are coming through and they're already a
Speaker 3: part of this community that they respect it and they
Speaker 3: understand it. That's where the energy needs to be put in.
Speaker 3: So in the end of the day, there's always going
Speaker 3: to be one person. You know this twenty fast forward
Speaker 3: twenty years from now, you know, professional Women's League, There'll
Speaker 3: still be some people that don't believe we be there.
Speaker 3: So but what I hope is in the next few
Speaker 3: years is it'll be full time and all those girls
Speaker 3: will have the opportunity to solely focus on the sport
Speaker 3: because once that transition is made.
Speaker 1: I mean from a pay perspective, a part time job pay. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And I don't know what the average AFLWAH is. It's
Speaker 1: forty dollars or something, it's four is that right?
Speaker 3: I think the average is probably around about twelve thousand
Speaker 3: dollars probably, Yeah, that much for you know, a six
Speaker 3: months commitment. Well, this is the thing. It's six months commitment,
Speaker 3: but it's not.
Speaker 1: But the season is about to go to double the games.
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah.
Speaker 3: And you know, once you're an athlete, you're an athlete,
Speaker 3: So it's not like it's you can an.
Speaker 4: On and off.
Speaker 3: Some of my teammates are paramedics, doctors, teachers, like laborers,
Speaker 3: and they're still managing to do that, and do that
Speaker 3: at a high level. Might add and then come to
Speaker 3: training after all of that and execute what they're doing,
Speaker 3: so it's only going to get better and the more
Speaker 3: support we get, and that includes viewerships, people actually coming
Speaker 3: to the games, people watching the games. All those things
Speaker 3: add to us fast tracking that and hopefully that will
Speaker 3: happen in a few more years.
Speaker 1: When I hear you talk, you know what I love,
Speaker 1: you never say I it's we, And you're not just
Speaker 1: talking about your team. You're talking about your sport now
Speaker 1: and your future sport. You did say you didn't want
Speaker 1: to just bang the flag in the ground, but you
Speaker 1: clearly take so much pride. I mean, you won't respectfully
Speaker 1: you get the financial rewards that you deserve because you
Speaker 1: probably won't be being paid enough by the time you retire. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and not to retire to it, but even if you're.
Speaker 4: Tiring six or seven years.
Speaker 1: I mean, there will be the next generation of AFLW
Speaker 1: stars running around getting paid half a million dollars a
Speaker 1: year and you'll be an integral part of that, and
Speaker 1: that's something to be super proud of.
Speaker 4: Thanks.
Speaker 3: Honestly that it means a lot. I think that sometimes.
Speaker 3: I mean I can't speak on behalf of all the
Speaker 3: players because some might feel different, but for me personally,
Speaker 3: I fell in love with this game for the sport,
Speaker 3: and still to this day, I play for the sport itself.
Speaker 4: And it's much bigger than me.
Speaker 3: And every time I go out there, as much as
Speaker 3: I am, I'm very competitive and I want to win
Speaker 3: and all that. I always in the back of my mind,
Speaker 3: I know that, like you said, there's going to be
Speaker 3: so much that comes after me, and I have to
Speaker 3: I have to have that in my mind because it's
Speaker 3: a responsibility. It is a responsibility because there's so many
Speaker 3: people watching, and so many people are critiquing every moment,
Speaker 3: every single there's someone waiting for us to fail, and
Speaker 3: they're waiting to cut our legs off. So it is
Speaker 3: really really important to me that we put the work
Speaker 3: in now because I want my daughter to grow up
Speaker 3: in a world where she doesn't know any different.
Speaker 4: That's so important to me.
Speaker 1: What are you? Powerful, passionate, refreshing perspective. Thank you so
Speaker 1: much for coming on the wood Life. I know we
Speaker 1: spoke about a few different topics and going to win here, there,
Speaker 1: and everywhere.
Speaker 4: We probably might need to do a part too.
Speaker 2: I think that's right.
Speaker 1: We could. We could do a part two for sure,
Speaker 1: and off here I'm going to get some sas tips
Speaker 1: off you because I've asked me a couple of times
Speaker 1: to go on the show, and I haven't because I
Speaker 1: didn't want to leave my baby shit, I wonder thank
Speaker 1: you so much for coming on the woodlfe.
Speaker 4: No, thank you for having me.
Speaker 3: Honestly, an absolute pleasure, and I'm so grateful to be here.
Speaker 1: Although the negative feedbacks of Bruina gets might be different
Speaker 1: from yours, we all have that internal monologue telling us
Speaker 1: that we can't, or we shouldn't, or we shouldn't even
Speaker 1: try in some cases. And I think the point here
Speaker 1: is we can do things that perhaps our internal monologue
Speaker 1: sometimes tell us that we can't. And of course there
Speaker 1: are many tools that we can use to help us
Speaker 1: break through these fears and doubts. I'd love to hear
Speaker 1: from you. What have you been doing, whether it's visualization
Speaker 1: or something else, to help you break through those personal
Speaker 1: fears and doubts in your life. And you can do
Speaker 1: that by sending us a little voice note in the
Speaker 1: link in the show notes. Next on the WOODLFE, we're
Speaker 1: tackling temptations. A few weeks ago, I released an episode
Speaker 1: around getting on top of your snacking. But cleaning out
Speaker 1: that fridge or hiding the unhealthy snacks perhaps from yourself,
Speaker 1: and putting healthy snacks in very easy to reach places. Now,
Speaker 1: for some of you, this has been a really easy
Speaker 1: change to make, and it's been fantastic to hear that
Speaker 1: many of you are already having success with it. But
Speaker 1: for others, I know there's a whole new array of
Speaker 1: challenges and temptations that come within the household, which brings
Speaker 1: me to this question.
Speaker 2: My name's Chloe. I'm from Queensland, Brisbane. My question for
Speaker 2: you today is a mental nutritional one. I'm in this
Speaker 2: situation where I'm trying to make healthy eating choices. However,
Speaker 2: I live in a household with the family member that
Speaker 2: is a junk food addict and one who just loves
Speaker 2: to be a variety of goodies every day, healthy and
Speaker 2: unhealthy types. So, as you imagine, our pantry bridge is
Speaker 2: filled with all kinds of goodies, and as much as
Speaker 2: I love them, I seem to find myself always falling
Speaker 2: into the temptations of eating their gouty history and then
Speaker 2: beating myself up over it. I've previously brought up the
Speaker 2: conversation about the situation, but the outcome is uncomfortable her
Speaker 2: feelings and the blame I means you to a lack
Speaker 2: of self control. I've tried different ways to compromise, but
Speaker 2: it's not easy and sustainable, and listening to your previous
Speaker 2: episode about clearing out the pantry isn't quite the option
Speaker 2: for me. So my question for you today is how
Speaker 2: do I go about living? And with so many patients?
Speaker 2: Hey bye wow.
Speaker 1: First of all, what a great question, Klaye. There's a
Speaker 1: lot of things to unpack there. First and foremost. I
Speaker 1: always say to people that you need to control your environment.
Speaker 1: You don't want your environment to control you. Now, I
Speaker 1: completely understand and appreciate that when you're in a sharehouse
Speaker 1: or more often, I see this with partners, particularly male partners.
Speaker 1: To be honest, so females with male partners and the
Speaker 1: male partners are very reluctant to get on the let's
Speaker 1: get ourselves fitter and healthier wagon, and it's almost easier
Speaker 1: for them to try and drag someone down rather than
Speaker 1: for them to try and lift themselves up. And when
Speaker 1: this is someone that you have been married to for
Speaker 1: a long time and you're in love with, that can
Speaker 1: be a very very tricky subject matter to bring up
Speaker 1: that you have to and listening to you, Chloe, and
Speaker 1: listening to the fact that you've tried to bring this
Speaker 1: up to your housemates, so I haven't say to people
Speaker 1: with their partners, and I think it is relevant to
Speaker 1: you too. It needs to be a really, really serious
Speaker 1: chat because it's often one of these things that we
Speaker 1: bring up flippantly, or it's just one of those things
Speaker 1: that just naturally comes up in conversation. Hey guys, be
Speaker 1: great if you didn't cook those snack can you remember
Speaker 1: I'm trying to really take care of myself right now.
Speaker 1: And everyone's a bit sort of sarcastic or facetious or
Speaker 1: self deprecating, and it doesn't necessarily get taken seriously. And
Speaker 1: where I've seen the greatest success is when people sit
Speaker 1: down their housemates or they loved one and say, look,
Speaker 1: I don't mind at all whether you do or don't
Speaker 1: join me on this journey. That's entirely your decision, which
Speaker 1: it is, but this is the most important thing to
Speaker 1: me right now. And if you care about me, which
Speaker 1: I know you do, I need your support on this.
Speaker 1: So it's not about you not eating these things, but
Speaker 1: I want you to help me with my willpower, help
Speaker 1: me with my support, and where possible, please not eat
Speaker 1: these things in front of me. Now, ultimately, of course,
Speaker 1: they are not controlling what goes into your mouth. They
Speaker 1: are controlling the temptation. But they don't feed you. We
Speaker 1: feed ourselves. So ultimately we need to take responsibility for ourselves.
Speaker 1: But they are a piece of the puzzle and they
Speaker 1: can help or hinder that challenge. So have that serious, deep, meaningful,
Speaker 1: important conversation. And if they still don't take you seriously, well,
Speaker 1: I think you need to question. And I know this
Speaker 1: sounds hush, you're free or perhaps even your relationship, which
Speaker 1: I don't think will happen. I think if it's brought
Speaker 1: up appropriately, with the right level of seriousness and no distractions,
Speaker 1: and you're really eyeballing this person and they can see
Speaker 1: how important it is to you, should have a breakthrough.
Speaker 1: So the conversation, of course is an integral and important part,
Speaker 1: but ultimately it's up to us. The buck stops with us.
Speaker 1: You have to own these things. You can't play the
Speaker 1: blame game. You have to say, no matter what external circumstances, challenges, temptations,
Speaker 1: I am faced with, I am going to own what
Speaker 1: ultimately goes into my mouth when it comes to food
Speaker 1: or drink, and the buck stops with you. So I
Speaker 1: hope that helps Chloe. An absolutely brilliant question, and I
Speaker 1: am sure that many many of our wood Life listeners
Speaker 1: have similar challenges and I hope that helps them too.
Speaker 1: If this type of advice is helping you, we'd love
Speaker 1: to hear from you. I'd love not just to hear
Speaker 1: future questions coming through, but I'd love our wood Life
Speaker 1: listeners to call in. Remember you can call in the
Speaker 1: links in the show notes. I'd love to hear that
Speaker 1: the advice that we have given is helping you make progress,
Speaker 1: helping you get breakthroughs. You know, maybe there's some penny
Speaker 1: drop moments going off as things are really resonating with you,
Speaker 1: and please please please share your success stories with us.
Speaker 1: As always, thanks so much for listening and being a
Speaker 1: part of the wood Life. Another motivational moment coming up
Speaker 1: this Monday. We'll see you soon.