WEBVTT - Not a Black Man's Best Friend (with Brian Simpson) 0:00:02.400 --> 0:00:04.880 That's why I would you hear you hear something mostly 0:00:04.960 --> 0:00:07.040 right when you go like I like I like dogs 0:00:07.120 --> 0:00:12.720 more than people. That that's crazy, that's crazy. Yes, I 0:00:12.720 --> 0:00:15.760 think when they say that, they're saying I like animals 0:00:15.840 --> 0:00:19.480 more than black people, right, that's what it feels like. 0:00:19.520 --> 0:00:23.440 That's like, I like animals more than people who don't 0:00:23.480 --> 0:00:26.599 look like me. Everybody else I'm pretty cool with, and 0:00:26.640 --> 0:00:29.840 I rank above in him. Like if you have Spider 0:00:29.840 --> 0:00:32.519 Man's delima when he could say, Barry Jane, what the 0:00:32.600 --> 0:00:35.680 train call? But accept it's a dog and a bus 0:00:35.680 --> 0:00:56.840 for the black people. Chips and yours are racists money stuff. 0:00:58.000 --> 0:01:03.920 I can't tell me. Yep, yep, yep, there it is. 0:01:04.000 --> 0:01:08.040 There it is. Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to another phenomenal 0:01:08.160 --> 0:01:11.880 episode of My Mama Told Me, the podcast where we 0:01:12.000 --> 0:01:15.800 dive deep deep into the pockets of black conspiracy theories 0:01:15.840 --> 0:01:19.440 and we finally worked to prove that Chuck Berry had 0:01:19.520 --> 0:01:23.080 to have invented rocking roll, because what's more rocking rod 0:01:23.440 --> 0:01:27.480 then secretly filming hundreds of women while they ship. You 0:01:27.520 --> 0:01:31.000 think Elvis Presley had that kind of commitment to the art. No, 0:01:31.200 --> 0:01:34.200 he did not. Elvis may have died on the toilet, 0:01:34.440 --> 0:01:38.080 but Chuck Berry lived on that toilet. He lived with 0:01:38.120 --> 0:01:41.680 a terrible, terrible conscience from all of the terrible things 0:01:41.760 --> 0:01:44.399 he did to the women he hurt. That's that's my 0:01:44.680 --> 0:01:47.119 that's the theory I'm spreading this week. I think i'm 0:01:47.160 --> 0:01:50.760 your host, lengths Thon Kerman. I'm happy to be here. 0:01:51.040 --> 0:01:54.320 I'm talking about crimes of Chuck Berry. I guess that's 0:01:54.400 --> 0:01:56.760 that's the energy. I'm coming in with, a little hot, 0:01:56.800 --> 0:02:00.080 a little weird. Did y'all know Chuck Berry watch Women? It? 0:02:00.320 --> 0:02:02.200 I did. I've known it for quite a while, and 0:02:02.280 --> 0:02:04.640 I'm happy to share with you the listeners at own. 0:02:05.520 --> 0:02:09.079 My guest today, he's shaking his head no, as if 0:02:09.520 --> 0:02:12.480 to say he didn't know that Chuck Berry filmed Women Shitty. 0:02:12.600 --> 0:02:17.160 But it's an exciting revelation for everybody. He's a wonderful 0:02:17.680 --> 0:02:21.600 stand up comedian, fucking hilarious. He's been on on Comedy Central. 0:02:22.000 --> 0:02:26.040 He most recently and most importantly as a killer fucking 0:02:26.160 --> 0:02:30.080 set on the stand Ups on Netflix season three. Y'all 0:02:30.080 --> 0:02:32.680 need to go watch the ship so funny. Please give 0:02:32.720 --> 0:02:41.240 it up for my guests. Mr Bryan Simpson, Hell yeah, damn. 0:02:41.240 --> 0:02:44.840 I didn't know that Chuck Berry watched people's ship. Yeah, well, women, 0:02:45.040 --> 0:02:49.280 he's not a sick Oh what how did how did 0:02:49.280 --> 0:02:53.480 it win? How? How? Apparently and this is like, you know, 0:02:53.560 --> 0:02:56.320 he had to have really invested because this was back 0:02:56.360 --> 0:03:01.440 when cameras were big and challenging to mount. But apparently 0:03:01.880 --> 0:03:05.200 he like would set up cameras in bathrooms and in 0:03:05.320 --> 0:03:08.000 his home so that he could he could have that footage, 0:03:08.280 --> 0:03:12.280 and then he he edited together to like basically have 0:03:12.440 --> 0:03:15.800 like a super cut of just ladies taking dumps. And 0:03:15.840 --> 0:03:19.000 so when he got arrested, FBI found all of that. 0:03:20.200 --> 0:03:22.560 I didn't know any of this about Chuck Berry. I 0:03:22.560 --> 0:03:25.200 just thought he was like a forgotten hero that had 0:03:25.200 --> 0:03:28.000 been robbed by the white man. I mean it's that too. 0:03:30.919 --> 0:03:33.840 Both can be true. You can be robbed by the 0:03:33.840 --> 0:03:37.320 white man and a real fucking sick oh you know. Yeah. 0:03:37.360 --> 0:03:40.520 The last time heard was like they don't give a 0:03:40.600 --> 0:03:47.080 chuck about no Berry. Yeah, wow, he was feeling people shitty. Man, 0:03:48.480 --> 0:03:52.120 they all got that thing. I guess I don't know. Yeah, 0:03:53.160 --> 0:03:55.120 So it's like he would throw away the urine ones. 0:03:55.200 --> 0:04:02.240 He would he didn't want to see baby alright, I 0:04:02.240 --> 0:04:04.120 mean I guess that's how you think of something like 0:04:04.240 --> 0:04:07.200 rock and roll. Look, you think you could have written 0:04:07.280 --> 0:04:10.160 Run Run Rudolph if you didn't see somebody's ship, you 0:04:10.200 --> 0:04:12.600 know what I mean? Like, you gotta see somebody ship 0:04:12.720 --> 0:04:15.120 to feel inspired in that. We've got to be operating 0:04:15.120 --> 0:04:19.280 on your own frequency exactly. That that ship that had 0:04:19.320 --> 0:04:21.960 to come from something real dark and real heavy. And 0:04:22.080 --> 0:04:26.400 they also invent the poop fetish. I don't know. And 0:04:26.440 --> 0:04:29.520 that's a great question that that maybe we need to 0:04:29.560 --> 0:04:32.920 explore in an episode, is that that Chuck Berry also 0:04:33.080 --> 0:04:36.680 is not getting credit for a different invention that he 0:04:36.839 --> 0:04:39.160 very much should be getting credit for it, because maybe 0:04:39.279 --> 0:04:42.560 Rock and Roll activated that fetish in in you know humans, 0:04:42.920 --> 0:04:46.000 m hm, you know maybe before there's no prior cases 0:04:46.040 --> 0:04:48.800 of people having a poop fetish before that. Yeah, and 0:04:48.839 --> 0:04:50.919 in a in an odd way, I do think that 0:04:50.960 --> 0:04:54.919 the poop fetish has has similarly been made to be 0:04:55.160 --> 0:04:58.159 a white sensation, right that that we sort of poke 0:04:58.200 --> 0:05:01.080 at these odd fetishes and we, oh, well, that's white 0:05:01.120 --> 0:05:03.440 people do that nasty ship. Black people wouldn't do that, 0:05:03.480 --> 0:05:07.120 and that's wrong. Chuck Berry invented that ship, and we 0:05:07.320 --> 0:05:11.640 got to take back our poop fetish you know. Yeah, 0:05:13.200 --> 0:05:15.240 I don't think we were getting me a pushback there either. 0:05:16.160 --> 0:05:18.760 I don't think white people are gonna be like, no, 0:05:18.880 --> 0:05:23.440 get no, you've gone too far. Well, well, who knows, man, 0:05:23.440 --> 0:05:27.360 that's an organization for everything that may be. That may 0:05:27.400 --> 0:05:29.560 be like a sub reddit for poop fetish people in 0:05:29.640 --> 0:05:34.039 preserving the history of Maybe there's one a a poop 0:05:34.080 --> 0:05:37.760 reddit Redding. Yeah, No, there's gotta be. If there's a 0:05:37.880 --> 0:05:40.440 boy Lovers of America or whatever, there's gotta be a 0:05:40.760 --> 0:05:43.680 fetish Yeah. I like to think that there's It's it's 0:05:43.760 --> 0:05:46.880 less of like the entire reddit dedicated to the history 0:05:46.880 --> 0:05:49.800 of it and more just there's a poop reddit, and 0:05:49.960 --> 0:05:53.560 some historians are a part of the poop reddit, you 0:05:53.600 --> 0:05:55.040 know what I mean, Like they come in and they 0:05:55.120 --> 0:05:58.880 hit the group with facts. Yeah, that seems more likely. Yeah, 0:05:59.760 --> 0:06:02.240 we keep talking about Chuck Berry and Poopy or Brian 0:06:02.320 --> 0:06:06.279 because you came to me with a conspiracy theory that 0:06:06.400 --> 0:06:08.880 I think this is gonna be a good one. It's 0:06:09.000 --> 0:06:12.680 one that I feel we've we've sort of covered on 0:06:12.920 --> 0:06:15.360 many episodes of the show, but never in the way 0:06:15.360 --> 0:06:18.520 that you're presenting it, and certainly not to the death 0:06:18.680 --> 0:06:20.960 that we need to go today. But you said, my 0:06:21.000 --> 0:06:31.400 mama told me Black people don't like dogs. Yeah, yeah, 0:06:33.800 --> 0:06:38.880 oh yeah, like my mom because I think, honestly, man, 0:06:39.000 --> 0:06:45.640 I think it comes from the old, old, old black 0:06:46.400 --> 0:06:51.480 need to present us as clean as like an encounters 0:06:51.560 --> 0:06:54.520 like almost like a subconscious counter argument to that we 0:06:54.520 --> 0:06:57.839 were dirty. It was like it was like the animals 0:06:57.839 --> 0:07:01.360 aren't in the house, damn, all up on the bed, 0:07:01.640 --> 0:07:04.200 all up in the counter, none of that. And so 0:07:04.360 --> 0:07:07.200 like my mom is, she is adamant about it, Like 0:07:07.240 --> 0:07:09.039 the animals. She won't come to my house because I 0:07:09.040 --> 0:07:12.840 have a cat. So she won't even visit you because 0:07:13.040 --> 0:07:16.480 you you have gone into this quote unquote dirtny space 0:07:16.720 --> 0:07:19.720 by hallowing an animal into you. Now, now she may 0:07:19.880 --> 0:07:24.880 come in, but she definitely won't eat. I feel like 0:07:25.520 --> 0:07:28.080 I can sit on your couch, but I'm not. I'm 0:07:28.080 --> 0:07:32.920 not eating your food. Yeah, damn. She's serious about it too. 0:07:33.480 --> 0:07:36.680 Do you so? I I assume based on that, so 0:07:36.800 --> 0:07:42.400 your mother was the person who introduced this idea to you? Then? Yeah? 0:07:42.480 --> 0:07:45.880 And so with that, do you did you believe it 0:07:45.960 --> 0:07:47.960 when you first heard it? Because now you have a cat, 0:07:48.000 --> 0:07:51.240 you obviously are I would hope an animal lover was 0:07:51.360 --> 0:07:54.720 the holerable. I've never I've never heard it from her. 0:07:55.200 --> 0:07:59.480 She just behaved that way. Oh but yeah, you I 0:07:59.640 --> 0:08:03.040 rarely saw any black people growing up with dogs that 0:08:03.120 --> 0:08:08.640 weren't like for protection purposes. Right, everybody's dog had a function, 0:08:08.880 --> 0:08:12.400 not friend. It wasn't none of these little dogs, these 0:08:12.440 --> 0:08:16.200 little cute dogs. You know. It was a German shepherd, 0:08:16.200 --> 0:08:17.960 it was a pit bull, it was a rot wallet. 0:08:18.040 --> 0:08:21.920 It wasn't a you know, a ship suit or none 0:08:21.920 --> 0:08:25.800 of that. But the truth is, I think I don't 0:08:25.800 --> 0:08:29.080 think this is a conspiracy theory. I think this is true. 0:08:29.200 --> 0:08:33.720 I think whoa, I think Black people don't like dogs 0:08:33.720 --> 0:08:38.240 because dogs don't like us. Oh. Like that was our 0:08:38.400 --> 0:08:42.080 general experience because having a dog is it's privileged, right. 0:08:42.120 --> 0:08:45.760 So it's like whenever you encounter your white friend's dog, 0:08:45.880 --> 0:08:47.920 it would be like right right, right, right, right right. 0:08:48.120 --> 0:08:51.080 They'd be like, oh, he doesn't usually act like this, 0:08:51.840 --> 0:08:56.200 right No, So so that that was always my experience. 0:08:56.240 --> 0:08:59.000 Whenever I would always just assume, oh, you don't have 0:08:59.120 --> 0:09:06.240 enough black people around your dog, right. You know. I 0:09:06.320 --> 0:09:08.920 talked about this a little bit earlier, but we did 0:09:09.040 --> 0:09:13.319 do a mini episode where someone suggested that exact theory 0:09:13.320 --> 0:09:17.040 that dogs are racist, that there there are some dogs 0:09:17.200 --> 0:09:19.560 and not some dogs. But the argument that I think 0:09:19.600 --> 0:09:24.079 that you're making is that animals have an inherent racism. 0:09:24.120 --> 0:09:26.160 And one of the things that we sort of found 0:09:26.760 --> 0:09:30.559 in that episode is that a lot of studies are 0:09:30.679 --> 0:09:33.720 arguing that they don't have inherent racism, and in fact, 0:09:33.840 --> 0:09:37.440 it is the lack of interaction that the owners have 0:09:38.240 --> 0:09:42.359 with these other groups that makes them react that way 0:09:42.480 --> 0:09:46.480 to black and brown people who they don't recognize. That like, 0:09:46.600 --> 0:09:50.280 dogs funk with people who look like their owners, and 0:09:50.280 --> 0:09:52.960 if you don't introduce them to people who don't look 0:09:53.000 --> 0:09:56.360 like you, they're gonna act weird when they finally see 0:09:56.400 --> 0:09:59.800 somebody else. Yeah. But if that's an excuse for dogs 0:10:00.000 --> 0:10:05.000 and wise and that excuse for people, I mean, look, 0:10:05.200 --> 0:10:10.600 you know, you know what, Horses ain't racists. Okay, they 0:10:10.600 --> 0:10:12.960 don't need to be socialized. Every time I met a horse, 0:10:12.960 --> 0:10:19.640 they were cooler ship. But so now dogs need to 0:10:19.679 --> 0:10:22.480 be socialized to like black people that than you racist? 0:10:22.520 --> 0:10:28.120 Then that's inherent balious. Okay. Now I'm I'm I'm enjoying 0:10:28.160 --> 0:10:31.120 going down this train because you are pointing out that 0:10:31.120 --> 0:10:33.720 that there are no other animals, not like you go 0:10:33.800 --> 0:10:35.840 to your friend's house and they have a bearded dragon 0:10:35.880 --> 0:10:41.360 and you gotta be like chill bro real racist right now. 0:10:41.960 --> 0:10:45.080 That said, I think the argument some people would make 0:10:45.559 --> 0:10:49.920 is that dogs are smarter animals than than the others 0:10:50.520 --> 0:10:54.040 by comparison, but not smart enough to be like cats, 0:10:54.040 --> 0:10:57.559 who are just like I'll kill the entire human race equally. 0:10:58.280 --> 0:11:03.040 I hate all of y'all. No one's special here. What 0:11:03.160 --> 0:11:07.640 about dolphins? Okay, dolphins don't gotta be there. They I 0:11:07.679 --> 0:11:12.520 think they're arguably the smartest creature other than us. Yeah, yeah, 0:11:12.480 --> 0:11:14.480 and they and they don't they don't well, I mean, 0:11:14.520 --> 0:11:18.040 they do sometimes kill humans, but they ain't never kill 0:11:18.120 --> 0:11:24.640 no black people. Yeah, what a bold statement. Can you 0:11:24.760 --> 0:11:27.160 prove that? I doubt it, But I love this the 0:11:27.320 --> 0:11:30.880 confidence that you went into that sentence with. I think 0:11:30.920 --> 0:11:32.280 it will be all over. It will be all over 0:11:32.280 --> 0:11:36.839 the news dolphin kills black man because we would add 0:11:36.880 --> 0:11:39.160 that every time a creature kills a black person, we 0:11:39.240 --> 0:11:43.320 added to the list. Sure, we don't. You know, we 0:11:43.400 --> 0:11:47.440 have an odd relationship with sort of like violence and animals. 0:11:47.600 --> 0:11:50.080 I think because I remember and I'm sure you remember 0:11:50.120 --> 0:11:54.400 this as well. Those uh, those when animals attack videos, 0:11:54.480 --> 0:11:57.520 And they used to do like specials on Fox when 0:11:57.600 --> 0:12:00.280 I was a kid, of like just showing you hours 0:12:00.320 --> 0:12:04.240 and hours of people getting fucking mauled by tigers and 0:12:04.600 --> 0:12:08.400 bears and ship And I remember my mother having like 0:12:08.559 --> 0:12:12.320 great pride in the fact that there were rarely, if ever, 0:12:12.480 --> 0:12:15.800 any black people in those videos. That she would be 0:12:15.880 --> 0:12:18.560 she'd be like, see, that's why, that's what's wrong with 0:12:18.600 --> 0:12:22.040 white people. They shouldn't be up in these fucking animals faces. 0:12:22.080 --> 0:12:24.080 And she would she'd go to bed all warm and 0:12:24.120 --> 0:12:26.880 cuddly knowing that there were no black men and women 0:12:26.920 --> 0:12:31.000 in those videos. And I wonder if that was just 0:12:31.120 --> 0:12:33.680 because we didn't get footage of it, or if they 0:12:33.760 --> 0:12:38.080 truly don't attack us, you know. And and here's the 0:12:38.080 --> 0:12:41.200 other side of that corn is when did you see 0:12:41.200 --> 0:12:45.120 black people getting attacked my animals? Uh? In civil rights 0:12:45.120 --> 0:12:48.920 footage and police was sicking dogs on us. Yes, so 0:12:49.000 --> 0:12:51.400 we a long time ago we added dogs as a 0:12:51.480 --> 0:12:54.360 list of animals we don't. I gotta know a dog 0:12:54.440 --> 0:12:59.920 friendly before I sure so, And most other animals I'm 0:13:00.040 --> 0:13:01.640 I'm willing to get in the benefit of the doubt, 0:13:02.200 --> 0:13:04.120 and and in a lot in a nice way, we 0:13:04.200 --> 0:13:08.199 already know what our relationship is with like gorillas and 0:13:08.320 --> 0:13:11.920 fucking tigers and ship, you know, going into that they 0:13:11.960 --> 0:13:15.040 don't like you, and so you can just objectively go, 0:13:15.400 --> 0:13:18.599 I there's no reason for me to even create this interaction. 0:13:18.960 --> 0:13:24.720 Whereas dogs, it's a much more complicated relationship because people people, 0:13:24.840 --> 0:13:29.840 White people have presented them as as friends, as partners 0:13:30.400 --> 0:13:35.120 for humanity, and then subsequently black people have not always 0:13:35.160 --> 0:13:40.200 gotten that same feedback from the animals. Right, they're like 0:13:40.280 --> 0:13:44.800 man's best friends. Yeah, it's like na not not every man. 0:13:45.000 --> 0:13:50.040 They don't really want to be friends with. Yeah, you know, 0:13:50.080 --> 0:13:53.040 and maybe we've been because I'm you know, like you said, 0:13:53.080 --> 0:13:57.440 we inherently know not to fun with any animals that 0:13:57.480 --> 0:14:03.079 could take you out in wance, white tigers, guerrillas of things, 0:14:03.200 --> 0:14:05.520 anything I could just rip you apart. You shouldn't be 0:14:05.520 --> 0:14:09.560 messing around with. But uh, you know, dogs of a 0:14:09.600 --> 0:14:13.480 certain size. You know, I've learned all the techniques. I 0:14:13.559 --> 0:14:18.120 let them sliff my hand. You know, I play like 0:14:18.200 --> 0:14:21.760 this as I as I got closer to the West Coast, 0:14:23.040 --> 0:14:28.320 I've encountered less hostile dogs as I'm one of them, 0:14:28.320 --> 0:14:33.200 as I'm in more diverse areas I've encountered less of 0:14:33.640 --> 0:14:37.120 less hostility from people's animals. I will say that in 0:14:37.400 --> 0:14:41.760 l A feels very singular in its behavior this way. 0:14:41.800 --> 0:14:45.880 But l A people treat their dogs like people to 0:14:45.960 --> 0:14:49.880 the point that they like bring them everywhere into restaurants. 0:14:49.960 --> 0:14:53.280 If you invite someone with a dog to your home 0:14:53.360 --> 0:14:56.440 in l A, they presume they can just bring the 0:14:56.600 --> 0:15:01.040 dog as that it's another guest. It drives me crazy 0:15:01.080 --> 0:15:04.840 as well, leave your fucking dog at home. But that said, 0:15:04.880 --> 0:15:08.320 I do think that also creates more of a a 0:15:08.520 --> 0:15:12.760 constant relationship with all races and communities for the animal 0:15:13.080 --> 0:15:15.120 in a way that if it's just trapped in a 0:15:15.120 --> 0:15:17.520 cage or in the you know, the walls of your home, 0:15:18.000 --> 0:15:20.200 it just looks at you and then doesn't know what 0:15:20.280 --> 0:15:24.640 to do. With everybody else, well that's not worth it. 0:15:25.360 --> 0:15:27.520 Look this, this, this recently just happened to me. I 0:15:27.560 --> 0:15:31.640 was so excited. I hit my cold medallion on Delta 0:15:32.120 --> 0:15:37.040 mm hmm, and I got upgraded the first class. It's like, oh, 0:15:37.080 --> 0:15:41.800 that never happens. I got so I'm sitting in the 0:15:41.800 --> 0:15:44.960 first class for you know, and this big in this 0:15:45.080 --> 0:15:48.960 big giant like he'll billy looking motherfucker sat down beside me, 0:15:49.560 --> 0:15:52.800 and maybe like eight or nine times during the flight, 0:15:52.840 --> 0:15:55.080 this is a five hour flight from New York to 0:15:55.320 --> 0:15:59.240 l A. He would he was he would fart, and 0:15:59.280 --> 0:16:03.240 I'm talking wicked, just nasty to the point where, you know, 0:16:03.280 --> 0:16:06.000 I kept looking at him and here here act like 0:16:06.040 --> 0:16:08.200 he was trying to act like he was sleeping, you know, 0:16:08.320 --> 0:16:10.080 And and I, you know, and I get up and 0:16:10.120 --> 0:16:11.760 walk down the other than the plane or go to 0:16:11.800 --> 0:16:13.840 the restroom or something just like like the tamn man, 0:16:13.880 --> 0:16:16.320 like hassle control yourself. And I'm sitting there a pistol 0:16:16.360 --> 0:16:19.080 this man the whole flight in the plane lands and 0:16:19.120 --> 0:16:21.440 we get up and I realized the lady in front 0:16:21.440 --> 0:16:23.880 of me had the damn dog in her lap and 0:16:23.880 --> 0:16:26.560 it was the dog farting the whole time. Oh so 0:16:26.720 --> 0:16:29.640 you're blaming it on this man and it wasn't the 0:16:29.680 --> 0:16:32.160 man at all. Yeah, I'm sitting it a whole time, 0:16:32.280 --> 0:16:34.640 like one smoke like younger me would have wanted all 0:16:34.680 --> 0:16:38.840 the smoke. Yeah, but yeah, I said, the whole time, 0:16:38.880 --> 0:16:42.480 blaming this nasty dog farts on this man and this 0:16:42.560 --> 0:16:46.640 lady just no shame, just shameless letting the dog. Yeah, 0:16:46.760 --> 0:16:48.680 and you could tell it it wasn't like a service 0:16:48.680 --> 0:16:52.280 dog or nothing, because because of the way it was, 0:16:52.400 --> 0:16:54.840 the way it was behaving. You know, Oh, I thought 0:16:54.880 --> 0:16:58.160 you were gonna say because of the size and breed 0:16:58.280 --> 0:17:01.000 of it that you know, service dogs got to be 0:17:01.040 --> 0:17:02.920 like a sturdy dog. I feel like a lot of 0:17:02.920 --> 0:17:05.480 people are bringing like lap dogs on and being like yeah, 0:17:06.160 --> 0:17:08.560 an it's like, yeah, that's alp dog. This is alp dog. 0:17:08.920 --> 0:17:13.720 And and you know, and she didn't even apologized or 0:17:13.760 --> 0:17:18.560 she didn't look ashamed or I mean, here's here's what 0:17:18.680 --> 0:17:23.080 I'll ask you. What could she have done because it's 0:17:23.119 --> 0:17:27.040 a fucking dog, like she can't be like, cut it out, Maurice. 0:17:27.440 --> 0:17:30.560 Quit quit farting on this guy. Damn plane. You're embarrassing 0:17:30.600 --> 0:17:36.480 me in first class. And that's because because you know, listen, 0:17:36.560 --> 0:17:38.960 if you're dog, because I get it dogs and dogs 0:17:39.040 --> 0:17:42.000 dogs gonna fire. Yeah, but if your dog got a 0:17:42.080 --> 0:17:46.320 problem with gas to deployment, like he's farting you know 0:17:46.680 --> 0:17:51.119 too three times an hour? Right, you're aware and you 0:17:51.280 --> 0:17:53.280 know what you're about to subject people to in this 0:17:53.440 --> 0:17:55.399 dag on tin can in the sky. You know, but 0:17:55.480 --> 0:17:59.159 we are a captive audience. Put a little mask on 0:17:59.240 --> 0:18:03.600 your dogs, but hole and and help us help ourselves 0:18:03.720 --> 0:18:07.200 through this experience. Yeah, and I think she may have 0:18:07.359 --> 0:18:11.000 hasn't kind of deodoriser or something, but she gets she 0:18:11.080 --> 0:18:16.840 only used it twice, like she gave up. Uh damn. Well, 0:18:17.400 --> 0:18:20.040 let's let's circle back, because I do think that that 0:18:20.280 --> 0:18:22.560 you started a bit of a train that I don't 0:18:22.600 --> 0:18:25.440 want us to completely jump off of. Yet you said 0:18:25.520 --> 0:18:29.119 there was for your mom it was a question of cleanliness. 0:18:29.680 --> 0:18:33.640 And now, as a pet owner, do you at all 0:18:34.600 --> 0:18:38.920 a line or at least understand your mom's position in 0:18:39.119 --> 0:18:42.399 terms of not wanting to be around unclean animals. Do 0:18:42.480 --> 0:18:45.600 you feel like you're a cat make sure place dirtier. 0:18:45.920 --> 0:18:49.440 Are you worried about that at all? Yeah, definitely. I 0:18:49.560 --> 0:18:55.280 mean it's a it's a constant fight to get her 0:18:55.320 --> 0:19:00.600 hair out of things. They need they need everything to 0:19:00.680 --> 0:19:04.359 smell like them, so they're constantly rubbing their face and 0:19:04.480 --> 0:19:08.040 pause on things because they need their scent everywhere. Yeah, 0:19:08.240 --> 0:19:12.320 and it's a constant fighting, you know, uh, running behind 0:19:12.440 --> 0:19:16.240 and recovering up her scent and her marking it back again. 0:19:16.359 --> 0:19:20.080 And yeah, yeah, I can understand completely. So you think 0:19:20.280 --> 0:19:23.280 your mom's not bugging when she goes like, nah, I'm 0:19:23.320 --> 0:19:26.879 not gonna eat here, we gotta go elsewhere. Well, I 0:19:27.000 --> 0:19:30.600 think she's being a little unreasonable and how far she'd 0:19:30.640 --> 0:19:34.840 take it, But but her base reasoning is sound. I mean, 0:19:34.880 --> 0:19:38.800 animals are are gross. Sure they're they're not they're not 0:19:39.080 --> 0:19:42.440 up to human standards of cleanliness. If not, no, I 0:19:42.440 --> 0:19:46.480 mean because children are gross too. Oh oh, buddy, hell 0:19:47.440 --> 0:19:49.639 you know. So it's you know, I don't know if 0:19:49.680 --> 0:19:51.399 you I mean, it's like like unless you want to 0:19:51.480 --> 0:19:54.280 live in a clean room with the white suits on 0:19:54.480 --> 0:19:56.800 and the you know, the air being pool to the 0:19:56.840 --> 0:19:59.240 ground and all. I mean, it's gonna be something in 0:19:59.320 --> 0:20:01.879 your house. Know for sure. The amount of times that 0:20:02.000 --> 0:20:04.520 my baby has thrown up on my chest and then 0:20:04.600 --> 0:20:08.000 I just had to finish a meal is countless at 0:20:08.040 --> 0:20:10.080 this point. And that's just part of the deal. If 0:20:10.119 --> 0:20:12.880 you love something, you kind of have to to let 0:20:12.960 --> 0:20:15.280 them do whatever it is that they know how to do. 0:20:15.440 --> 0:20:17.080 And right now, all she knows how to do is 0:20:17.119 --> 0:20:20.040 ship and throw up. So here we are right right right. 0:20:20.160 --> 0:20:23.240 But having an animal is a hard choice, and it's 0:20:23.280 --> 0:20:27.280 also something you can undo after the fact. You can't, 0:20:27.480 --> 0:20:29.879 it's well, I guess you can do that with with 0:20:30.040 --> 0:20:32.680 kids too. But it's kind of frowned. Not legally, it's 0:20:32.800 --> 0:20:36.160 a it's a well, it's a messier legal situation when 0:20:36.200 --> 0:20:38.920 you when you just decide to undo it, you gotta 0:20:38.960 --> 0:20:42.320 kind of have a reason for it a little more. Yeah, well, 0:20:42.560 --> 0:20:44.280 nothin you can just say give it up, I think, 0:20:47.160 --> 0:20:49.320 I mean, yeah, you can do it, but but you 0:20:49.440 --> 0:20:52.439 gotta you gotta really prove this is worth it, because 0:20:53.440 --> 0:20:56.080 the court and just letting you like leave the house 0:20:56.160 --> 0:20:58.560 and never come back kind of vibes. Yeah. I think 0:20:58.560 --> 0:21:02.480 that's definitely illegal. Yeah, let me ask you this before 0:21:02.520 --> 0:21:04.880 we before we go to break, because I do think 0:21:04.920 --> 0:21:07.280 that this is an important one. You said you do 0:21:07.600 --> 0:21:12.120 believe that black people don't like animals, and yet here 0:21:12.200 --> 0:21:15.920 you are a pet owner speaking to me. Do you 0:21:16.160 --> 0:21:20.800 think that like or or is there a rephrasing of 0:21:20.920 --> 0:21:23.000 this that you would want us to consider. Do you 0:21:23.119 --> 0:21:29.320 think you're just an exception to the rule for black people? No, Yeah, 0:21:29.359 --> 0:21:30.920 I would I would rephrase it. I would, I would. 0:21:30.920 --> 0:21:33.640 I would just say I think black people in general, 0:21:35.600 --> 0:21:40.640 we like animals from a distance, you know, it's more 0:21:40.680 --> 0:21:44.200 of an up close relationship that becomes challenging. Yeah, yeah, 0:21:44.240 --> 0:21:47.040 we have a different relationship with animals. I think you would. 0:21:47.119 --> 0:21:49.600 You would be hard pressed to find a lot of 0:21:49.640 --> 0:21:52.280 Black people that say they like animals more than people. 0:21:52.880 --> 0:21:57.080 H they out there, but generally speaking, black people are 0:21:57.119 --> 0:22:01.240 like no animals and animals I pro black, first time 0:22:02.840 --> 0:22:06.640 pro animal like probably right, like black people, Black people 0:22:06.720 --> 0:22:10.680 have outside dogs generally Yeah, yeah, I mean Instagram is 0:22:10.720 --> 0:22:12.639 kind of changing that way, like black women now have 0:22:12.800 --> 0:22:15.680 lap dogs, but that thing used to be the case. Yeah, 0:22:15.720 --> 0:22:18.240 I do think to that point, some of this feels 0:22:18.320 --> 0:22:22.480 like a version of of like media, right, like the 0:22:23.080 --> 0:22:27.240 our relationship with media, where it's like yo, for years, 0:22:27.440 --> 0:22:30.159 we were told over and over again that our dogs 0:22:30.240 --> 0:22:33.639 were just meant to be attack dogs and movies and television, 0:22:34.080 --> 0:22:36.440 and so subsequently a bunch of people were like, yeah, 0:22:36.840 --> 0:22:38.840 I've got to get the attack dog. I'm not about 0:22:38.880 --> 0:22:43.400 to kiss it in the mouth like a psychopath everybody else, 0:22:44.720 --> 0:22:47.000 But like you know what you know. Two, we started 0:22:47.000 --> 0:22:49.520 to with mel Gibson. I don't know remember lead the 0:22:49.560 --> 0:22:51.760 weapon with mel Gibson shared the ice cream cone with 0:22:51.840 --> 0:22:55.280 his dog, absolutely man, And that was a whole different 0:22:55.320 --> 0:23:00.560 reaction in the black theaters. Nasty, what do you now? 0:23:01.160 --> 0:23:03.520 And it turns out the black theaters were more right 0:23:03.560 --> 0:23:08.000 about mel Gibson. Right, we should have booed him for 0:23:08.119 --> 0:23:11.399 a lot of his behavior this whole time. All Right, 0:23:11.480 --> 0:23:13.239 we're gonna take a break. We'll be back with more 0:23:13.320 --> 0:23:43.680 Brian Simpson and more, my mama told me, and we all, yeah, 0:23:44.040 --> 0:23:46.000 we're back here with more Brian Simes and more. My 0:23:46.119 --> 0:23:48.359 mama told me. We're still talking about the possibility that 0:23:48.480 --> 0:23:52.840 black people do not like dogs specifically, we don't like 0:23:53.040 --> 0:23:56.240 them up close. We're more of a keep your distance 0:23:56.440 --> 0:23:58.720 kind of relationship, or rather, we have more of a 0:23:58.920 --> 0:24:03.320 keep your distance kind of relationship with animals. Do you think, Brian, 0:24:03.800 --> 0:24:07.760 that that is specific to the breeds? Are we like, Yell, 0:24:07.920 --> 0:24:12.200 I funk with Schnauzers, but I don't funk with pit 0:24:12.320 --> 0:24:14.560 bulls or whatever it is. Or is it just the 0:24:14.720 --> 0:24:19.879 animals in general? Mm hmmm. I don't know, because because 0:24:19.960 --> 0:24:22.159 again too, I think I think this theory is a 0:24:22.240 --> 0:24:27.240 little antiquated, because like I said, because now it's sort 0:24:27.280 --> 0:24:30.159 of it's sort of just now started becoming acceptable for 0:24:30.320 --> 0:24:34.879 us to be more gentle, right and open with our 0:24:34.960 --> 0:24:39.080 mental health. Yeah, that sort of thing. And so you know, 0:24:39.240 --> 0:24:42.359 now you now and nowadays, in the last decade, you 0:24:42.600 --> 0:24:45.520 see more Black people with lap dogs and more Black 0:24:45.560 --> 0:24:49.159 people with other breeds. But seriously, when I grew up, 0:24:49.160 --> 0:24:51.920 I ain't see nothing but rock Wallace and pit bulls 0:24:51.960 --> 0:24:55.720 and German shepherds. Yeah, in a in a odd way, 0:24:55.760 --> 0:24:58.800 it's sort of like Black people couldn't learn to love 0:24:58.920 --> 0:25:08.520 dogs until they learn to love themselves. You know, I'm 0:25:08.560 --> 0:25:10.680