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Speaker 1: And I invited you here.

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Speaker 2: Thought I made myself perfectly clear. When you're a guest

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Speaker 2: to my home, you gotta come to me empty. And

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Speaker 2: I said, no guests, your presences presents enough. I already

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Speaker 2: had too much stuff.

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Speaker 1: So how do you dare to surbey me?

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Speaker 3: Welcome to I said, no gifts? I of course am

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Speaker 3: bridge or Wineger. And I'm so happy you're here. It's

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Speaker 3: a very special, very special episode today. One year. One year,

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Speaker 3: we've been doing this podcast one full year. Here we

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Speaker 3: all are. You know, we've been through a lot. It's

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Speaker 3: been a very interesting time and we're so thrilled to

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Speaker 3: you know that we're able to do this. And I'm

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Speaker 3: thrilled that you've been here. And maybe this is your

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Speaker 3: first episode, and that case you, God help you, because

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Speaker 3: there's a lot of backstory and you're you might as

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Speaker 3: well be learning Mandarin. I don't know what to tell you.

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Speaker 3: You're going to want to go back and listen to

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Speaker 3: the other episodes in order to contextualize what's happening here.

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Speaker 3: This is not a beginner's podcast. This is the sort

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Speaker 3: of podcast that you need the lore. I've been building

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Speaker 3: a world here, and so go back and listen to

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Speaker 3: those episodes. If you've been here since the beginning, God

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Speaker 3: bless here we are. Let's get into it. I can't

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Speaker 3: tell you how excited I am happy birthday to the

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Speaker 3: podcast because we're here with my dear friend, none other

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Speaker 3: than Jen Spira. Jen, Welcome to I said, no gifts, Bridger.

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Speaker 4: I am so honored to be here. I can't I

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Speaker 4: can't even. I can't even. Jen.

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Speaker 3: You know, when we booked you on the show, we

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Speaker 3: you know, we I put very little thought into anything

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Speaker 3: I do, so you know, I of course was thrilled

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Speaker 3: to have you, but I didn't realize it was going

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Speaker 3: to line up with the one year anniversary of the podcast.

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Speaker 3: I mean, let's be honest, who who whatever, I guess

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Speaker 3: the podcast would make it to a year. So that alone,

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Speaker 3: that alone is really a But now it's lined up

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Speaker 3: with you here.

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Speaker 4: I love that it's lining up. I almost wish you

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Speaker 4: and told me that because I almost thought for a

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Speaker 4: second that maybe you chose me for the special occasion.

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Speaker 4: I realized it was just the winds of chaos and

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Speaker 4: not your love for me. But that's okay, that's fine, Jim.

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Speaker 4: I'm going to counter maybe it was the winds of fate. Yes,

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Speaker 4: I've been looking at this in very different ways exactly.

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Speaker 4: And Richard, I'm going to have to remind myself that

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Speaker 4: we're not just talking on the phone as we do,

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Speaker 4: and I'm going to have to remind myself not to

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Speaker 4: complain and mention all the names and things and numbers

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Speaker 4: that I normally would bring up with you.

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Speaker 3: Right by now, we would have we would have just

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Speaker 3: destroyed four different people. We would have.

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Speaker 4: Buried four of our closest those closest. No, we would

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Speaker 4: have destroyed various luminaries and none of that, none of that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you have to really there's a different set of

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Speaker 3: rules to a podcast, and it our relationship is so

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Speaker 3: deeply intimate that now we're now on this podcast and

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Speaker 3: we're there's going to be a distance that the listener

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Speaker 3: is going to feel, We're going to feel a coldness.

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Speaker 3: They're going to halfway through they're going to say, I

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Speaker 3: can't take it. It was too frigid. I had to

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Speaker 3: turn off the podcast. And I understand that. Yeah, sounds

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Speaker 3: like a divorced couple, you know, meeting for the first

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Speaker 3: time in years. Jen that said, how have you.

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Speaker 4: Been pretty sure? Well, I've been I've been good. I

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Speaker 4: mean I'm freshly back and squeaky clean from my tennis lesson.

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Speaker 3: Oh that's that's where I've literally just been tennis lesson.

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Speaker 4: Yes, I have taken up tennis, and I get lessons

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Speaker 4: from a my my husband and I. Perhaps you've heard

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Speaker 4: of them, Tommy.

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Speaker 1: Thomas.

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Speaker 4: Yes, Thomas and I Judy's lessons once a week on

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Speaker 4: Friday afternoons with this guy who looks like he's one

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Speaker 4: of those Civil War guys where they look straight out

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Speaker 4: like their face. You know, it's like, well, I guess

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Speaker 4: there's something almost you're right. I I mean it in

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Speaker 4: the way where there's a timeless it's actually not even timeless.

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Speaker 4: It's a specific time. He looks like someone you'd see.

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Speaker 4: He looks like a racist war documentary. I mean, listen,

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Speaker 4: Bridge or he might listen to this, because everyone does.

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Speaker 4: I know, I'm not gonna, I'm not eve gonna say

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Speaker 4: his first name, but it rhymes with rash, but I

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Speaker 4: won't say it.

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Speaker 3: You're getting lessons from Tosh point zero. What's his name,

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Speaker 3: Daniel Tosh?

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Speaker 4: Oh my god, how.

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Speaker 3: Long have you been taking tennis lessons?

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Speaker 4: This is my second lesson?

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Speaker 3: You're sorry?

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Speaker 4: Well, no, this is my second with Rush and then

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Speaker 4: and then two years ago maybe we got a lesson

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Speaker 4: on vacation, so this is really technically my third.

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Speaker 3: Okay, And are you now is it's going to be

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Speaker 3: a weekly lesson or is this just.

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Speaker 4: That's the hope that I'm in. I'm currently in a

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Speaker 4: tropical climate. Well, I'd actually don't know what you'd call Savannah, Georgia,

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Speaker 4: where I'm weirdly living just as I hide up from

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Speaker 4: New York City right now. But there's a lot of

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Speaker 4: rain and it's it's like it's so there have been

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Speaker 4: rain cancelations.

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Speaker 3: Oh okay, yeah, Now prior to these lessons, did you

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Speaker 3: play tennis at all?

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Speaker 4: I only breathed. I did have lessons when I was

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Speaker 4: like in sixth grade, but they were indoors and so

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Speaker 4: there was none of the glamour that you find on

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Speaker 4: the outdoor court. And I also had none of the

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Speaker 4: glamorous associations that I now have with tennis when I

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Speaker 4: was learning as a child. So I just my heart

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Speaker 4: wasn't in it. But because of my growing interest in

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Speaker 4: a few luminaries like Federer, like Serena, I now and

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Speaker 4: and visits to England randomly during Wimbledon. I never went,

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Speaker 4: but it's like a party. When when Wimbledon's happening in London,

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Speaker 4: it's like it's like a party, and I just it

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Speaker 4: feels very It feels really rich and fancy, and I

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Speaker 4: like that.

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Speaker 3: It feels like the tennis walls are closing in on you.

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Speaker 3: I mean, do you do strike me as a tennis player?

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Speaker 3: You look like someone who plays tennis. I feel like

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Speaker 3: I've seen you an advisor at some point.

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Speaker 4: Oh that's so sweet.

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Speaker 3: You know, you've just got it. You have a tennis

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Speaker 3: aura around you.

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Speaker 4: Thank you so much. I want to cultivate that. I mean,

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Speaker 4: and that's why I just want. I just want to

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Speaker 4: be able to serve and have it look good. But

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Speaker 4: there's no power in my serve right now.

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Speaker 3: So we're gonna have to now back to this tennis coach. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: between you and Thomas, which one of you is more

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Speaker 3: likely to have an affair with the coach?

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Speaker 4: We were discussing this today. We were discussing this because

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Speaker 4: I was like, we paid him more this time because

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Speaker 4: we think he's under charging and we were and I

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Speaker 4: was like, you know what, let's just pay him more

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Speaker 4: because he's so good. And then I was like, oh, no,

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Speaker 4: he's definitely going to think we're trying to have sex

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Speaker 4: with him, and that we're trying to like, you know,

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Speaker 4: who is more likely. Well, we have discussed. Now it's

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Speaker 4: out in the open. It wasn't really out in the

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Speaker 4: open box us, and now after this lesson, we did

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Speaker 4: talk about it because this guy, you know, I mean,

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Speaker 4: when he a few times I look, look, might moderate

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Speaker 4: a couple of times, he like does the serve and

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Speaker 4: it's like there's so much power and he's so agile,

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Speaker 4: and he's so seemingly effortlessly athletic, and he's also pretty

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Speaker 4: like built in stuff. So look, hey, all right with

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Speaker 4: the third degree bridge. Tommy and I did talk about it,

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Speaker 4: but I mean, you know, he gets it, so I'm

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Speaker 4: not even gonna say me. I mean me, but probably

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Speaker 4: three would come before even just one of us.

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Speaker 3: I do feel like, you know, you get into the

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Speaker 3: tennis lessons, that's just a given someone will be having

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Speaker 3: an affair with the tennis coach. You just do that

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Speaker 3: before even sign the sign up for you just say,

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Speaker 3: you know, this is going to ruin our marriage, but

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Speaker 3: we will be better tennis players at the end of it.

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Speaker 4: I know, From the first five minutes of working with

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Speaker 4: this person, I did understand the cliche. I was like,

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Speaker 4: oh this, I get that.

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Speaker 3: Now you're out in the sun, you're swinging your bodies around,

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Speaker 3: you're all wearing mini skirts.

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Speaker 4: I don't know exactly exactly, but yeah, there's only maybe

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Speaker 4: a forty nine percent chance that it ruins my marriage

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Speaker 4: in my life.

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Speaker 3: Those odds are fine, exactly. You've we bridge a hold on,

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Speaker 3: hold on.

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Speaker 4: Who in your engine's life is most likely to crash

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Speaker 4: your home and lure one of you into an affair.

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Speaker 3: Like what sort of person?

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Speaker 4: No, I mean a person in your life currently like

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Speaker 4: you've encountered together. I mean, or I guess you could

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Speaker 4: go with a what sort of a person? But I

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Speaker 4: was thinking, is there's I guess the way I phrased

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Speaker 4: it is actually a little bit harder for you to just.

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Speaker 3: Like, who is our current who is our let's just

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Speaker 3: say it, I mean, who's our Daniel Tosh? Who's going

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Speaker 3: to swing? Who who currently is floating around ready to

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Speaker 3: destroy our relationship? You know, that's that's a hard one

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Speaker 3: because we are in the middle of a pandemic and

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Speaker 3: we haven't introduced a lot of new people to our

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Speaker 3: lives recently, but I do feel like, who am I

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Speaker 3: seeing who? Who occasionally is around that could even possibly

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Speaker 3: like a rail carrier, I mean, the male. We do

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Speaker 3: have the male carrier coming by. You can't see his face,

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Speaker 3: so that's a hard one. I mean, but you know,

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Speaker 3: maybe he takes that off and suddenly he's just the

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Speaker 3: hottest person on the planet and he's irresistible. We did

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Speaker 3: move into this house a little while ago, and we've

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Speaker 3: had like a handyman come by that feels like an

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Speaker 3: odd race. Carlos comes by, seduces one of us. He's,

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Speaker 3: you know, a sweet guy. But other than that, we

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Speaker 3: truly see no one. There's a guy across the street

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Speaker 3: who washes his car every single day. Oh my god,

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Speaker 3: that could be he's, you know, in his late sixties,

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Speaker 3: early seventies. I don't know that he's really in this

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Speaker 3: seduction game anymore, but he is out there washing his

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Speaker 3: car constantly. Maybe he's trying to catch our eye. There's

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Speaker 3: another guy up the street, an angry man who's constantly

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Speaker 3: working on his like muscle cars. Maybe he bullies one

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Speaker 3: of us into having an affair with him. Although I'm

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Speaker 3: almost feeling a homophobic air from him, which I don't

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Speaker 3: think he wants anything to do with us.

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Speaker 4: Oh Jesus, I'm in your own backyard, in.

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Speaker 3: Our own backyard, homophobes in your own in my own yard,

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Speaker 3: the homophobe next door roaring around in his Mustang. But

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Speaker 3: you know those I mean, those are options. I'm not

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Speaker 3: ruling any of those people out. And it is the

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Speaker 3: person you least expect, although in your situation, it's this

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Speaker 3: person you most expect. So it's it's essentially the person

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Speaker 3: who will ruin your relationship is anyone. It really could

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Speaker 3: be anyone, And you have to keep your eyes open.

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Speaker 3: You've got especially if you're looking to cheat, You've got

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Speaker 3: to keep your eyes open. You've got to be looking

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Speaker 3: for those new candidates that you might be. You know,

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Speaker 3: I'm out having I'm out on a walk for an

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Speaker 3: hour a day. There are people all over I could

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Speaker 3: be cheating non.

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Speaker 4: Stop, Jesus Bridge.

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Speaker 3: So you know, suddenly, if somebody.

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Speaker 4: Is going to beat you, he's going to be standing

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Speaker 4: outside with his belt when you walk out of the room,

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Speaker 4: He's going to beat the shit out of you.

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Speaker 3: It could happen, but you know this is the rules

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Speaker 3: are have been thrown out we have been living in

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Speaker 3: very close quarters for a full year. I mean that

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Speaker 3: this podcast coincidentally is also kind of the year anniversary

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Speaker 3: of Lockdown, which was a whole other situation.

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Speaker 4: You know.

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Speaker 3: I do feel I'm a conduit for evil forces, or

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Speaker 3: for the some, or for bad things to enter the planet.

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Speaker 3: Last year, last February, I posted the first thing advertising

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Speaker 3: this podcast, and it said, get ready for this podcast

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Speaker 3: March twelfth, when all hell breaks loose. That was I said,

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Speaker 3: get ready for when all hell breaks loose. Right March

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Speaker 3: twelfth comes, the podcast is released literally the first day

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Speaker 3: of the massive lockdowns.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god.

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Speaker 3: I've predicted all sorts of things in the year the

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Speaker 3: past year, you know. Most recently we talked about daft Punk.

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Speaker 3: Four days later, daft Punk breaks up.

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Speaker 4: Bridger. You you're a Mormon witch. Okay, you we know

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Speaker 4: that you're a Mormon witch. Joseph Smith was reborn. You

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Speaker 4: are the second coming of Joseph Smith, and you're a witch.

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Speaker 3: Wait, okay, so we need to get back to I

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Speaker 3: also love what You're just rank out of a giant

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Speaker 3: Seinfeld mug.

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Speaker 4: It's a kooky no soup for you, mug. Yep, that's right.

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Speaker 3: Did that come with the place you're renting.

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Speaker 4: You know what it does seem it's that's that's really

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Speaker 4: does seem like a rental munk. But no, Thomas bought

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Speaker 4: this for his dad, and the idea was that we

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Speaker 4: were going to give it to his dad as a

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Speaker 4: president because his dad loves you know, the no soup

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Speaker 4: for you sure souper Nazi. But that never panned out.

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Speaker 4: I don't know why we didn't give it to his dad,

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Speaker 4: but I mean, I don't think that's going to happen anymore.

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Speaker 3: No, I mean, how long have you had it? I

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Speaker 3: mean you're drinking out of it.

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Speaker 4: I know, I know. Yeah, Thomas was excited. I think, oh,

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Speaker 4: I think you definitely go. Oh he got it at

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Speaker 4: TJ's or Marshalls one time recently when we've gone for

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Speaker 4: one of our very sad errands.

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Speaker 3: Are the tjs and Marshall's and Georgia just open for biz?

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Speaker 3: Oh they're wide open, honey, I guess they're open here now, Yeah,

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Speaker 3: they're they're open.

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Speaker 4: And we've gone just for like very random things where

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Speaker 4: Tom Thomas is and I'm not interested in finding a deal,

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Speaker 4: and so Thomas will like try to find a deal.

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Speaker 4: Deals me nothing to me. Money means nothing to me.

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Speaker 4: I live as though I have all the money I need.

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Speaker 4: It's not true, but I just I just don't. I

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Speaker 4: don't think well for one second about it. I'm just

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Speaker 4: like and I don't know what things cost, and I

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Speaker 4: just I want to keep living in my way.

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Speaker 3: I feel like that that lines up for you. You

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Speaker 3: make choices that are you know, like when we go

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Speaker 3: out to eat, I mean we there was maybe the

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Speaker 3: most memorable time we had brunch. We were in New

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Speaker 3: York and it was probably eleven am. And let me

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Speaker 3: see if I can recall what you ordered. You. I

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Speaker 3: think you started out with fish tacos. You also got

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Speaker 3: a hot chocolate, You had a raspberry lemonade, and then

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Speaker 3: I think, did you order chicken hingers? Breakfast orient Today?

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Speaker 4: I asked Jim for one of his chicken fingers, and

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Speaker 4: I ordered something else of my own. What it was

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Speaker 4: the other I had another savory thing and I didn't

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Speaker 4: like any of it, And that's why I asked Jim

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Speaker 4: if I could have some of his.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you order You're you're an interesting person because on

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Speaker 3: a lot of levels you are extremely classy. And then yeah,

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Speaker 3: in like the realm of food you order like it's

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Speaker 3: your eleventh birthday party.

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Speaker 4: I one thousand percent, And I think it's like almost

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Speaker 4: reminds me a little bit of this guy Nick Napier,

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Speaker 4: who's so funny that I don't know if you know him,

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Speaker 4: like that Chicago, like legend dude, he started the Annoyance Theater.

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Speaker 4: He's so funny. And he said that like as an adult,

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Speaker 4: he likes to go I don't know if he still

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Speaker 4: does this, but he likes to go to toy stores

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Speaker 4: and he thinks back to being a kid and being

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Speaker 4: a toy store and how he couldn't he couldn't get anything.

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Speaker 4: But now if he is forty dollars, he's like a

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Speaker 4: rich kid in a toy store. And I guess I

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Speaker 4: just I really love the like the extreme sense of

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Speaker 4: bounty that you have when you order everything you want

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Speaker 4: in a restaurant. It's not that much money to pay

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Speaker 4: for a feeling that to me is like a really abundant,

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Speaker 4: amazing feeling.

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Speaker 3: I wish I could bring that into my own mind.

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Speaker 3: As you know, I order bare minimum. My life is

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Speaker 3: just constantly scraping by you and I share so many things,

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Speaker 3: but in other ways that is just beyond. That's like

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Speaker 3: another lifetime, Like I would have to be born in

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Speaker 3: a new body in order to to behave that way.

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Speaker 4: I know, I know, but I'm so inspired by your

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Speaker 4: clarity of purpose, your abstemiousness, your focus. I like that,

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Speaker 4: the essentialness You're so Yeah, I don't. Sometimes I discuss myself.

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Speaker 4: I do sometimes because yeah, I overdo it left and right.

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Speaker 3: Can you think of something recently you've overdone?

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Speaker 4: Oh Jesus, I mean sure, I definitely yeah, well, actually

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Speaker 4: overdone because the thing is it normally on the weekends

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Speaker 4: my habit, but this was my this is when I'm

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Speaker 4: normally when I'm in New York. I would most recently,

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Speaker 4: but this is right before the lockdown. I was going

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Speaker 4: to the Plaza cafeteria, which is in the basement of

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Speaker 4: the Plaza, and it's not a cafeteria. It's all these

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Speaker 4: fancy food stalls. It's it's fucking awesome. And I would

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Speaker 4: easily get, you know, seventy dollars worth of like various

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Speaker 4: moose cakes, tarts, and basically throw myself a party like

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Speaker 4: when I went back to the apartment, and then pretty

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Speaker 4: much and then I would try to force Thomas to

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Speaker 4: eat it over the rest of the weekend if I

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Speaker 4: didn't finish it, and then I'd throw it away, like

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Speaker 4: on Monday, I just throw it all away. But a

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Speaker 4: recent overboard is probably a thing that I do a

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Speaker 4: lot now where we go to this one outdoor seafood

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Speaker 4: restaurant that has you it's like you're right by the

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Speaker 4: water and it's really spaced out and it's ideal and

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Speaker 4: order everything. It's so annoying, like I have to almost

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Speaker 4: acknowledge it to the waiter or else. It's like, you know,

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Speaker 4: it's weird because it's like it's it's way more for

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Speaker 4: two than two people. But I like to have bites

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Speaker 4: of like many different things.

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Speaker 3: So what are you like at this restaurant? What are

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Speaker 3: you worrying all right here?

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Speaker 4: Because when my parents came, who by the way, had COVID,

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Speaker 4: so I had to not see them for I ended

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Speaker 4: up seeing at the tail end of their visit when

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Speaker 4: they when they were COVID free. Yes, but I didn't

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Speaker 4: even order my full order because I was too shamed

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Speaker 4: to do it even in front of my own parents.

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Speaker 4: But my full order would be first of all, the

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Speaker 4: hush puppies flow freely. You don't have to pay for those.

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Speaker 4: They just keep coming. So they give you a huge

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Speaker 4: wooden bowl hush puppies, and we start with them then,

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Speaker 4: and I'll do this quickly. This is I get the

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Speaker 4: coconut shrimp. I get the bling bling shrimp. Okay, the

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Speaker 4: coconut shrimp comes with marmalade. The bling bling is in

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Speaker 4: this sample aoli sauce. It's a spicy man amazing. I

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Speaker 4: get fried green tomatoes. I get a sided cheese grits.

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Speaker 4: I get sweetea, but I pretty much eat it all.

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Speaker 4: And the thing is, Thomas is so large, and he's

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Speaker 4: one of those guys where it's like, you know, he'll

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Speaker 4: make sure it's all gone, so I never feel guilty.

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Speaker 3: It's actually wild to me that you and I can

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Speaker 3: be friends because you sitting there telling me about this order.

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Speaker 3: If we were sitting at a table together, I would

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Speaker 3: be sweating. I would be thinking, this is going to

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Speaker 3: be an enormous bill.

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Speaker 4: I know, but so it is. It's always an enormous,

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Speaker 4: shockingly large bill. But I don't know that it's not

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Speaker 4: that bad.

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Speaker 3: Well, speaking of shameful things, I mean, I don't you know.

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Speaker 3: I don't bring people on this podcast to embarrass them

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Speaker 3: or to to. It's not a gotcha podcast, you know,

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Speaker 3: it's not a oh I tricked you sort of thing.

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Speaker 3: It's you know, it's a respectful venue where two adults

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Speaker 3: come together and respect each other's wishes and just treat

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Speaker 3: each other as equals. It is called I said No Gifts,

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Speaker 3: which you know, you've known that for a long time.

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Speaker 3: The podcast is out there on you know, every service

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Speaker 3: to listen to to kind of familiarize yourself with, and

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Speaker 3: the title. Even if you don't listen to the podcast,

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Speaker 3: it's fairly clear I said no gifts. So, of course

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Speaker 3: we've talked about this. I was excited to have you

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Speaker 3: on the show. We booked you a few weeks ago,

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Speaker 3: and I was so thrilled. You know, Jen's got a

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Speaker 3: new book which we'll talk about, and I was excited

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Speaker 3: to talk about that and just to see your face.

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Speaker 3: And so it was a little I don't even know

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Speaker 3: what the word was. I don't even know how to

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Speaker 3: describe the feeling at this point, but unsettling. When I

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Speaker 3: opened the door recently to find a package which was

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Speaker 3: not something I had ordered, it was not something Jim

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Speaker 3: had ordered. You know, I went through my little black

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00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:59,560
Speaker 3: book nobody I knew had sent me a package. I realized,

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00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:02,200
Speaker 3: you know, I had Jim open up because you never

397
00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:04,520
Speaker 3: know when a mysterious package comes, whether it's going to

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Speaker 3: be full of white powder or some other dangerous object.

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Speaker 3: He said, I think it might be a gift from

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00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:17,880
Speaker 3: Jen And I, of course, you know, took a few

401
00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:22,560
Speaker 3: days just to cool down, reset, And I have to

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Speaker 3: ask you, Jenna, is this a gift for me?

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Speaker 4: I understand why you're asking, because there was no note,

404
00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:34,840
Speaker 4: no card, which is slightly unusual in the bestowing of

405
00:22:34,880 --> 00:22:39,240
Speaker 4: a gift. Yeah, I want to say it is for you,

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Speaker 4: and it's a gift for you, and I gave it

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00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:47,160
Speaker 4: with a I gave it to you because I want

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Speaker 4: to teach you a lesson about respect respecting me.

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Speaker 3: So I broke you, okay, I mean you did break me.

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Speaker 2: You know.

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Speaker 3: There was the the sweating, the stress, the you know

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00:23:03,320 --> 00:23:05,480
Speaker 3: bursts that over those courts of the course of those

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Speaker 3: few days.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, well, this is this is what I wanted to do.

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00:23:09,640 --> 00:23:13,080
Speaker 4: And so I did not take you into account. I

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00:23:13,080 --> 00:23:15,320
Speaker 4: didn't take you into account. I mean, while we're here,

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00:23:15,440 --> 00:23:17,879
Speaker 4: you know, yeah, we're clearing the air here. I just

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00:23:18,080 --> 00:23:20,120
Speaker 4: do you want me to open the I do want

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Speaker 4: you to open the gift, and I wonder if I can.

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Speaker 4: I'm bummed because there was a part one and a

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00:23:25,240 --> 00:23:29,919
Speaker 4: Part two unrelated gifts I and we only have one gift,

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Speaker 4: and I wonder even if it's worth it to tell

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Speaker 4: you what Part two is.

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Speaker 3: You would tell me Part two prior to me opening

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Speaker 3: Part one.

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Speaker 4: No, let's open part one, right, they are unrelated. I

427
00:23:42,520 --> 00:23:46,120
Speaker 4: simply couldn't. I simply had two ideas and I went

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Speaker 4: with two gifts.

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Speaker 3: It's the uh, okay, you know, I'm not going to

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Speaker 3: say anymore. I will say it's in this beautiful packaging.

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00:23:56,040 --> 00:23:59,240
Speaker 3: It says happy Birthday. There's a big one on it

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00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:05,359
Speaker 3: with a tissue paper. It's impossible to say who could

433
00:24:05,359 --> 00:24:09,960
Speaker 3: have possibly done this at this it's hard to say.

434
00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:14,359
Speaker 3: What matters is that it's in the packaging and which

435
00:24:14,880 --> 00:24:21,919
Speaker 3: it needs to be opened. So I'm going to go

436
00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:22,760
Speaker 3: ahead and dive in.

437
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:24,639
Speaker 4: Please please diving.

438
00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:30,200
Speaker 3: Oh, get the tissue here, and just you know, this

439
00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:34,479
Speaker 3: is the one year anniversary. Let's really crinkle it up.

440
00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:40,040
Speaker 3: It's just okay, we're reaching into the box, into the

441
00:24:40,040 --> 00:24:41,520
Speaker 3: bag here. Now there's a box.

442
00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:44,439
Speaker 4: Oh my god, Oh maybe it is the.

443
00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:47,159
Speaker 3: So I'm going to open this up. We're going to

444
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:52,640
Speaker 3: be careful, see what's happening. And I'm going in the line.

445
00:24:53,840 --> 00:25:00,960
Speaker 4: Oh boy, this.

446
00:25:02,359 --> 00:25:06,080
Speaker 3: There's so much to say here. I'm looking at Martha

447
00:25:06,160 --> 00:25:12,240
Speaker 3: Stewart's Cookie Perfection cookie Book. This is something one hundred

448
00:25:12,359 --> 00:25:16,560
Speaker 3: plus recipes to take your sweet treats to the next level.

449
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:21,520
Speaker 3: This speaks to me in so many ways. I don't

450
00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:23,000
Speaker 3: even know where to begin.

451
00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:26,560
Speaker 4: Is one of them, because you what are your feelings

452
00:25:26,560 --> 00:25:27,320
Speaker 4: about Martha.

453
00:25:28,480 --> 00:25:32,240
Speaker 3: Let's just get into Martha Stewart. Thank God, thank God

454
00:25:32,680 --> 00:25:35,320
Speaker 3: this podcast. You know, we've and we will. We will

455
00:25:35,320 --> 00:25:38,040
Speaker 3: talk more about cookies in a moment. This podcast. Almost

456
00:25:38,040 --> 00:25:41,040
Speaker 3: every episode I can avoid talking about cookies. It's one

457
00:25:41,080 --> 00:25:43,920
Speaker 3: of the subjects that I just lose my mind over.

458
00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:47,240
Speaker 3: But let's get into Martha Stewart, because that's another subject. Yeah,

459
00:25:47,280 --> 00:25:50,080
Speaker 3: Martha Stewart, And I don't know, Martha Stewart's been part

460
00:25:50,119 --> 00:25:53,359
Speaker 3: of my life since probably the early nineties because my

461
00:25:53,440 --> 00:25:59,240
Speaker 3: mom loved Martha Stewart. Oh god, So I'll just say

462
00:25:59,240 --> 00:26:02,960
Speaker 3: that I am obsessed with Martha Stewart. I want to

463
00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:04,720
Speaker 3: but I do want to hear how you feel about

464
00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:05,560
Speaker 3: Martha Stewart.

465
00:26:05,760 --> 00:26:10,879
Speaker 4: Okay, well, I we've never discussed Martha Stewart. Nevertheless, I

466
00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:14,880
Speaker 4: associate you with Martha. I assumed you would absolutely love

467
00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:16,479
Speaker 4: Martha's coiled rage.

468
00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:18,720
Speaker 3: Of course, now.

469
00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:20,760
Speaker 4: That's something I would. So I knew that you'd love

470
00:26:20,840 --> 00:26:26,080
Speaker 4: that and the strained you know, perfectionism. There's a detail

471
00:26:26,520 --> 00:26:29,199
Speaker 4: that I'm recalling now that if you love Martha, I

472
00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:33,000
Speaker 4: think you'll love At a Christmas party at the Late

473
00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:35,800
Speaker 4: Show where I used to work as a writer, one

474
00:26:35,800 --> 00:26:38,200
Speaker 4: of the camera guys for one of Martha's TV shows.

475
00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:40,080
Speaker 4: He was one of the camera guys for the TV show,

476
00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:42,159
Speaker 4: and he said, somehow he knew this, How did he

477
00:26:42,240 --> 00:26:45,720
Speaker 4: know this? That in I don't know which her Hampton's house.

478
00:26:45,720 --> 00:26:49,600
Speaker 4: I think when she would have the driveway powerwashed the

479
00:26:49,680 --> 00:26:52,119
Speaker 4: flag it was a flagstone driveway where she would have

480
00:26:52,200 --> 00:26:56,960
Speaker 4: each flagstone removed and washed separately. Yeah, I need you

481
00:26:57,000 --> 00:26:59,720
Speaker 4: to know that. And then you know, you know the

482
00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:02,720
Speaker 4: Woo Town thing, the shoe thing with her lubue tak oh,

483
00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:04,560
Speaker 4: so she you know lubut Town's which are the red

484
00:27:04,560 --> 00:27:10,320
Speaker 4: soul right heels. She would have an assistant sharpie them in.

485
00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:12,600
Speaker 3: Really she didn't want the red soul.

486
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:15,840
Speaker 4: Didn't want the red soule, but she just loved the lubouotwn.

487
00:27:16,040 --> 00:27:19,080
Speaker 3: Wow. She loved the shape of the shoes, she loved

488
00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:22,000
Speaker 3: the feel, but she wanted it to be cheaply covered

489
00:27:22,040 --> 00:27:22,639
Speaker 3: with marker.

490
00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:25,320
Speaker 4: Well, exactly what's on is there's no way to love

491
00:27:25,320 --> 00:27:28,400
Speaker 4: the field. It's one of the most most comfortable. Insane

492
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:31,159
Speaker 4: But no, the flagstaff thing is much more like something

493
00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:33,160
Speaker 4: that you could never have you know. That of course

494
00:27:33,160 --> 00:27:34,680
Speaker 4: fits with Martha, but is insane.

495
00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:40,000
Speaker 3: So she had every stone removed. I'm picturing a giant

496
00:27:40,119 --> 00:27:42,720
Speaker 3: rock tumblr that she's having them run through or putting

497
00:27:42,720 --> 00:27:46,680
Speaker 3: each one in the dishwasher. Ow long does that take?

498
00:27:46,800 --> 00:27:49,240
Speaker 3: And that can't possibly be true?

499
00:27:49,640 --> 00:27:51,800
Speaker 4: You're right, it doesn't. Yeah, because it's like, I know

500
00:27:51,840 --> 00:27:54,240
Speaker 4: what flagstone looks like, how do you take it out?

501
00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:56,879
Speaker 4: I don't. I don't know. It was such a weird

502
00:27:57,520 --> 00:27:58,280
Speaker 4: thing to tell her.

503
00:27:58,280 --> 00:28:01,399
Speaker 3: It's also such a boring thing. Yeah, it's not like

504
00:28:01,440 --> 00:28:06,120
Speaker 3: the sort of myth that's like, Wow, what an exquisite,

505
00:28:07,119 --> 00:28:09,760
Speaker 3: larger than life thing. It's like she was cleaning rocks,

506
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:13,360
Speaker 3: but just in the most wild way you could possibly

507
00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:16,439
Speaker 3: think of. Exactly, But that's what we love about Martha

508
00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:21,960
Speaker 3: Stewart is Martha will not stop. She goes to every

509
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:24,880
Speaker 3: extreme to make her life exquisite.

510
00:28:25,119 --> 00:28:27,600
Speaker 4: Did you love her when your mom loved her as

511
00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:28,320
Speaker 4: a kid.

512
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:31,680
Speaker 3: When my mom loved her? I think, you know, there

513
00:28:31,720 --> 00:28:36,840
Speaker 3: was among my siblings and I we all kind of

514
00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:39,840
Speaker 3: resented Martha Stewart because we had to watch the show.

515
00:28:39,880 --> 00:28:41,520
Speaker 3: I think it was on every Sunday. But then there

516
00:28:41,560 --> 00:28:44,320
Speaker 3: was also the element of loving the show. You got

517
00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:48,560
Speaker 3: to watch this woman make perfect cookies and improve her home,

518
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:51,760
Speaker 3: and she's a calumning presence, despite the fact that clearly

519
00:28:51,800 --> 00:28:55,480
Speaker 3: she's ready to strangle everyone around her at all times. Yes,

520
00:28:56,480 --> 00:28:59,920
Speaker 3: but there was never a time that I genuinely disliked

521
00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:00,800
Speaker 3: Martha Stewart.

522
00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:01,520
Speaker 4: Oh no.

523
00:29:01,920 --> 00:29:04,680
Speaker 3: And she was also like providing recipes that you know,

524
00:29:04,680 --> 00:29:07,160
Speaker 3: our mom would make for dinner and this kind of thing.

525
00:29:07,280 --> 00:29:12,640
Speaker 3: So and she's always has been kind of inherently ridiculous too,

526
00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:16,800
Speaker 3: which is just fun to watch. I mean, Martha, I

527
00:29:16,840 --> 00:29:20,120
Speaker 3: know you're listening, Come on the podcast. You're not ridiculous,

528
00:29:20,160 --> 00:29:26,200
Speaker 3: You're fantastic. I genuinely love Martha Stewart because she's such

529
00:29:26,280 --> 00:29:30,880
Speaker 3: a bizarrely layered person. There's that weird sheen the perfection.

530
00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:35,480
Speaker 3: There's the anger that's constantly simmering and threatening to boil over,

531
00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:39,600
Speaker 3: and then there's the criminal element. There's also in the

532
00:29:39,680 --> 00:29:43,640
Speaker 3: last year, she's gone feral. You're not on Instagram, are you?

533
00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:44,640
Speaker 4: I lurk.

534
00:29:45,360 --> 00:29:47,920
Speaker 3: Martha Stewart's Instagram is top five.

535
00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:48,680
Speaker 4: I don't know it.

536
00:29:48,760 --> 00:29:49,280
Speaker 3: Oh my god.

537
00:29:49,320 --> 00:29:50,800
Speaker 4: I can't believe it's not in there for me. Oh

538
00:29:50,840 --> 00:29:51,120
Speaker 4: my god.

539
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:55,320
Speaker 3: I mean there's like there's kind of an almost sinister

540
00:29:55,480 --> 00:29:56,400
Speaker 3: element to it.

541
00:29:57,000 --> 00:29:57,280
Speaker 4: Wow.

542
00:29:58,120 --> 00:30:01,720
Speaker 3: Like I feel like there's occasionally references to things dying

543
00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:05,440
Speaker 3: or death, and then she'll post photos where it's just

544
00:30:05,480 --> 00:30:10,240
Speaker 3: like this is a little evil whoa. And then I

545
00:30:10,280 --> 00:30:12,760
Speaker 3: also feel like she's fun. I feel like she's also

546
00:30:12,960 --> 00:30:15,600
Speaker 3: just like she enjoys herself on some level.

547
00:30:16,120 --> 00:30:19,240
Speaker 4: Yep, you do feel like she actually has fun and

548
00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:20,120
Speaker 4: enjoys her thing.

549
00:30:20,600 --> 00:30:22,520
Speaker 3: Right, this is a you know, this is a woman

550
00:30:22,560 --> 00:30:25,720
Speaker 3: who has been to prison, who has also knows how

551
00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:29,720
Speaker 3: to perfectly decorate a sugar cookie. I mean, the things

552
00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:33,440
Speaker 3: that Martha Stewart contains is so beyond. She's friends with

553
00:30:33,520 --> 00:30:37,840
Speaker 3: Snoop Dogg. It feels like a genuine friendship at this point. Right,

554
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:41,200
Speaker 3: did you grow up with Martha Stewart, not.

555
00:30:41,400 --> 00:30:43,760
Speaker 4: Really, because my mom is so much more sort of

556
00:30:44,640 --> 00:30:47,680
Speaker 4: My mom didn't wasn't interested in any homemaker related kind

557
00:30:47,720 --> 00:30:51,480
Speaker 4: of like icons, that just isn't her thing. She was

558
00:30:51,560 --> 00:30:53,680
Speaker 4: much more interested. I mean it was much more like

559
00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:58,120
Speaker 4: the I mean, like in terms of magazines Veranda, Architectural Digest.

560
00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:03,280
Speaker 4: She loves interior design, and it's a little bit basically

561
00:31:03,320 --> 00:31:06,640
Speaker 4: of a more She's just she probably really likes Martha,

562
00:31:06,880 --> 00:31:10,800
Speaker 4: but my mom is so elitist that Martha's world. I

563
00:31:10,800 --> 00:31:13,400
Speaker 4: think she likes it, but she isn't gonna She just

564
00:31:13,520 --> 00:31:14,680
Speaker 4: was never a follower.

565
00:31:15,120 --> 00:31:19,440
Speaker 3: Interesting, So when did Martha really I mean, what's your

566
00:31:19,480 --> 00:31:20,720
Speaker 3: exposure to Martha? Then?

567
00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:25,160
Speaker 4: Probably an early exposure was simply when I started at

568
00:31:25,280 --> 00:31:28,200
Speaker 4: college at Barnard, which is a women's college in Manhattan.

569
00:31:28,280 --> 00:31:29,880
Speaker 3: Martha went, oh, I didn't know Martha.

570
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:33,400
Speaker 4: She's in Alum. She's in Alum. Yeah, So you learn

571
00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:36,800
Speaker 4: very quickly that Martha's Ornelhurst and Joan Rivers and one

572
00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:39,760
Speaker 4: of the girls from like there was a reality show

573
00:31:39,800 --> 00:31:42,000
Speaker 4: what the fuck it was with? It was with Ralph,

574
00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:44,160
Speaker 4: it was with Tommy Hill, Figure's daughter. There was a

575
00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:46,200
Speaker 4: reality show I think on MTV in like two thousand

576
00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:48,520
Speaker 4: and three was Tommy hill Figure's daughter and Tommy hill

577
00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:52,160
Speaker 4: Figure's daughter's best friend and the best friend went to

578
00:31:52,200 --> 00:31:54,480
Speaker 4: Barnard and she was my year and so like it

579
00:31:54,520 --> 00:31:56,800
Speaker 4: was this big deal that she was there. I don't

580
00:31:56,840 --> 00:31:58,720
Speaker 4: remember the name of the show or her name.

581
00:31:59,040 --> 00:32:02,640
Speaker 3: And wait, were they filming the show like while she

582
00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:03,600
Speaker 3: was in college?

583
00:32:04,000 --> 00:32:06,560
Speaker 4: Yes, little bit, they were there. I remember Justin's Hoffman's

584
00:32:06,600 --> 00:32:09,800
Speaker 4: daughter was there, so called Dustin Hoffan moving her in. Yeah,

585
00:32:10,640 --> 00:32:13,200
Speaker 4: I mean it's not Brown okay, where there really are

586
00:32:13,200 --> 00:32:16,000
Speaker 4: a lot of slub kids, but Barnard has some sleb kids.

587
00:32:16,240 --> 00:32:19,719
Speaker 3: Wow. And I mean, let's be honest with Jen Spyra,

588
00:32:20,520 --> 00:32:24,440
Speaker 3: Oh my god, Jen Spier's I mean, what an incredible.

589
00:32:24,600 --> 00:32:28,280
Speaker 4: My daughter is, right, my daughter does go to Barnard.

590
00:32:28,720 --> 00:32:31,960
Speaker 3: Well, listen, Martha Stewart wasn't Martha Sewart. Was just Martha

591
00:32:32,000 --> 00:32:33,840
Speaker 3: when she was there. She wasn't the icon.

592
00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:36,480
Speaker 4: You're so right. She was just Martha and she was

593
00:32:36,520 --> 00:32:38,680
Speaker 4: I think she was probably modeling as well when she

594
00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:41,720
Speaker 4: was there. I learned that she was a model. But yeah,

595
00:32:41,720 --> 00:32:43,200
Speaker 4: that's I think I was aware that she went to

596
00:32:43,240 --> 00:32:46,400
Speaker 4: Barnard and then she just always she always just seemed

597
00:32:46,440 --> 00:32:49,080
Speaker 4: like almost like a Comedia del Arte character of like

598
00:32:49,520 --> 00:32:52,560
Speaker 4: the perfect woman. But the thing is the coldness was

599
00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:56,960
Speaker 4: always there's that, But that's what I'm attracted to her.

600
00:32:57,000 --> 00:33:01,000
Speaker 4: I'm attracted of course, how there's yeah that she seems

601
00:33:01,040 --> 00:33:01,719
Speaker 4: really cold.

602
00:33:02,120 --> 00:33:05,080
Speaker 3: Anyone can be friendly and do recipes on TV. But

603
00:33:05,120 --> 00:33:07,320
Speaker 3: when there's like an aspect of like, oh I don't

604
00:33:07,320 --> 00:33:09,400
Speaker 3: think she would be friends with me, or I think

605
00:33:09,520 --> 00:33:12,960
Speaker 3: she would like order my hit, you know, have me killed,

606
00:33:13,520 --> 00:33:18,080
Speaker 3: then I'm in. I've exactly person encompasses everything.

607
00:33:19,520 --> 00:33:24,280
Speaker 4: Totally because actually the strategy I also associate with you

608
00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:29,360
Speaker 4: a master tactician who's thinking for d chess, you are

609
00:33:29,520 --> 00:33:35,600
Speaker 4: forty steps ahead and like the complicated, diabolical strategizing. I

610
00:33:35,960 --> 00:33:38,680
Speaker 4: do also see you guys in that way.

611
00:33:40,120 --> 00:33:42,640
Speaker 3: And then she's got one hundred and one cookie recipes.

612
00:33:42,800 --> 00:33:47,240
Speaker 3: You know, it's exactly. It's really Did you ever see

613
00:33:48,080 --> 00:33:52,840
Speaker 3: the TV movie Martha inc? Oh no, now this was

614
00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:57,920
Speaker 3: starring Sybil Shepherd was I believe it was made shortly

615
00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:04,000
Speaker 3: after Martha went to prison, but Sybil plays Martha Stewart.

616
00:34:04,240 --> 00:34:08,800
Speaker 3: It's absolutely horrible, but I own it on DVD. It's

617
00:34:08,840 --> 00:34:10,200
Speaker 3: such an enjoyable watch.

618
00:34:10,640 --> 00:34:11,600
Speaker 4: Oh I can't wait.

619
00:34:11,920 --> 00:34:15,399
Speaker 3: You know, Sybil's out there throwing a copper pot at

620
00:34:16,520 --> 00:34:19,680
Speaker 3: somebody at some point. You know, there are a lot

621
00:34:19,719 --> 00:34:23,120
Speaker 3: of real breakdowns. I don't know how true to life

622
00:34:23,160 --> 00:34:27,359
Speaker 3: it is, but I pray that it's close. I never

623
00:34:27,400 --> 00:34:31,080
Speaker 3: saw the sequel there was Martha behind Bars. That one

624
00:34:31,160 --> 00:34:33,799
Speaker 3: was never released on DVD, and I've tried to track

625
00:34:33,840 --> 00:34:36,840
Speaker 3: it down. I've tried to pirate it. I don't know

626
00:34:36,880 --> 00:34:40,000
Speaker 3: where to get Martha behind Bars. So if anyone out

627
00:34:40,000 --> 00:34:43,280
Speaker 3: there knows how to get Martha behind Bars, Sybil Shepherd,

628
00:34:43,960 --> 00:34:47,399
Speaker 3: I assume the whole thing is in prison. What does

629
00:34:47,440 --> 00:34:49,360
Speaker 3: that even look like as a TV movie?

630
00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:52,359
Speaker 4: Yeah, I can't believe. I've never even heard of it,

631
00:34:52,480 --> 00:34:55,680
Speaker 4: But that sounds so fun, just a great evening.

632
00:34:55,880 --> 00:34:59,400
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, it's just bad television at its best.

633
00:35:00,560 --> 00:35:05,560
Speaker 4: Yes, I'm watching it now. I'm not even paying attention.

634
00:35:05,760 --> 00:35:07,920
Speaker 4: I'm just I'm thinking about it, and i'm watching it.

635
00:35:07,960 --> 00:35:08,560
Speaker 4: I'm loving it.

636
00:35:09,080 --> 00:35:14,000
Speaker 3: I loved it so much that, you know, probably fourteen

637
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:17,920
Speaker 3: years ago or so, I made a compilation of clips

638
00:35:17,960 --> 00:35:20,720
Speaker 3: from Martha Inc. And put them on YouTube early YouTube.

639
00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:26,000
Speaker 3: Days and months later, I got an email from none

640
00:35:26,040 --> 00:35:31,520
Speaker 3: other than Sybil Shepherd's assistant saying they loved the montage,

641
00:35:31,840 --> 00:35:35,239
Speaker 3: could they get their own copy on DVD? So, of

642
00:35:35,280 --> 00:35:36,920
Speaker 3: course was thrilled out of my mind. I sent it

643
00:35:36,960 --> 00:35:42,839
Speaker 3: to them. Sybyl sent me a signed head shot and

644
00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:48,040
Speaker 3: a Sibyl Shepherd mousepad, which now I think I only

645
00:35:48,160 --> 00:35:50,440
Speaker 3: recently had to throw away because it kind of just

646
00:35:51,360 --> 00:35:54,120
Speaker 3: turned to crumbs, which was weird. I don't know what

647
00:35:54,160 --> 00:35:56,200
Speaker 3: it was made of, probably something radioactive.

648
00:35:57,160 --> 00:36:01,760
Speaker 4: That's pritchard. That's that's the most That's the most insane

649
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:05,399
Speaker 4: thing I've ever heard. Is that something that celebrities have

650
00:36:05,520 --> 00:36:09,920
Speaker 4: or do. That's the equivalent of the Derek Jeter you know,

651
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:12,360
Speaker 4: gift basket when a woman would like, you know, he'd

652
00:36:12,400 --> 00:36:14,359
Speaker 4: like have someone and they'd eat his ass and then

653
00:36:14,360 --> 00:36:16,080
Speaker 4: he would send them that gift basket. It was like

654
00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:18,959
Speaker 4: the Derek Jeter. This is like a known thing where

655
00:36:18,960 --> 00:36:21,920
Speaker 4: like you'd go to Derek Jeter's penthouse, you eat his ass,

656
00:36:21,960 --> 00:36:24,640
Speaker 4: and then he would send you this gift basket with

657
00:36:24,760 --> 00:36:25,239
Speaker 4: all of this.

658
00:36:25,400 --> 00:36:28,359
Speaker 3: Swag like like what like a Derek Jeeter.

659
00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:30,880
Speaker 4: TA think it was way. It was a lot of

660
00:36:30,920 --> 00:36:33,040
Speaker 4: good stuff. I think there must have been Yankee stuff,

661
00:36:33,040 --> 00:36:35,720
Speaker 4: but like I guess, like even when you're really fancy

662
00:36:35,719 --> 00:36:38,000
Speaker 4: important that the swag bags that you get on the

663
00:36:38,040 --> 00:36:40,200
Speaker 4: late night shows, I don't think they're that. I think

664
00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:41,759
Speaker 4: it's like when you're an Oscar nominee and you get

665
00:36:41,760 --> 00:36:44,759
Speaker 4: those crazy swag things, probably like a tooth whitening kit,

666
00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:51,719
Speaker 4: you know, like get exactly and some weird piece of

667
00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:55,120
Speaker 4: jewelry from David Yerman and just like random.

668
00:36:54,719 --> 00:37:01,000
Speaker 3: Shit, right like a mini disc player TV this kind

669
00:37:01,000 --> 00:37:04,239
Speaker 3: of case, exactly. And I just can't believe that you

670
00:37:04,400 --> 00:37:06,360
Speaker 3: got that from Sybil And it was a mouse It

671
00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:11,200
Speaker 3: was a mousepad that said Sybil Disobedience, Oh my god.

672
00:37:11,600 --> 00:37:13,960
Speaker 3: And it was kind of like the uh, like the

673
00:37:14,239 --> 00:37:18,719
Speaker 3: Warhol pop effect of four of her faces in different colors.

674
00:37:18,800 --> 00:37:22,719
Speaker 3: I don't I have to imagine Sybil designed this thing.

675
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:25,680
Speaker 3: Who else is out there designing Sybil Shepherd mousepads?

676
00:37:26,760 --> 00:37:28,799
Speaker 4: But I hope that that still is going on because

677
00:37:28,840 --> 00:37:32,239
Speaker 4: that almost feels like a frivolous early aughts thing. Oh

678
00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:34,640
Speaker 4: and I really hope that we get back to that

679
00:37:35,239 --> 00:37:39,520
Speaker 4: late Roman thing and where we can have frivolity and

680
00:37:39,640 --> 00:37:40,879
Speaker 4: access like that, right.

681
00:37:41,000 --> 00:37:44,759
Speaker 3: Where every celebrity has a mousepad. Uh, you know, it's

682
00:37:44,880 --> 00:37:48,640
Speaker 3: just absolute nonsense that does not just the gravy, the

683
00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:50,439
Speaker 3: gravy of society.

684
00:37:50,640 --> 00:37:54,480
Speaker 4: That's amazing. Bridger, that's like such a great that's crazy.

685
00:37:54,719 --> 00:37:57,600
Speaker 3: It was, you know I that's still to this day

686
00:37:57,719 --> 00:38:01,960
Speaker 3: is probably the uh it wasn't quite an encounter, but

687
00:38:02,640 --> 00:38:06,279
Speaker 3: we'll call it a celebrity encounter. The fact that I

688
00:38:06,320 --> 00:38:10,480
Speaker 3: have there's like a burnt DVD of mine floating around

689
00:38:10,480 --> 00:38:15,000
Speaker 3: Sybil Shepherd's house and I had to throw away her mousepad. Sybil,

690
00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:18,919
Speaker 3: if you have any left again, reach out, reach out

691
00:38:18,920 --> 00:38:22,279
Speaker 3: to Martha, maybe to reconcile. I'm sure there's still some

692
00:38:22,600 --> 00:38:25,560
Speaker 3: but that's all water under the bridge. The movie came

693
00:38:25,600 --> 00:38:30,640
Speaker 3: out years ago. Back to the podcast, I'm literally just

694
00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:37,560
Speaker 3: talking to Okay, Martha Stewart. We I mean, I could

695
00:38:37,600 --> 00:38:40,319
Speaker 3: I could just launch a whole other podcast. Maybe that's

696
00:38:40,320 --> 00:38:43,839
Speaker 3: my next move, is the Martha Cast. But let's talk

697
00:38:43,840 --> 00:38:46,480
Speaker 3: about cookies, because this is another subject that I love

698
00:38:46,560 --> 00:38:49,439
Speaker 3: to talk about. Jen, do you like cookies? I feel

699
00:38:49,440 --> 00:38:51,680
Speaker 3: like there really must be a thing you like to eat.

700
00:38:52,239 --> 00:38:56,200
Speaker 4: I do. I love cookies. Actually, it's funny. I recently

701
00:38:56,280 --> 00:38:59,440
Speaker 4: had and I'm writing a story, and I think might

702
00:38:59,680 --> 00:39:02,680
Speaker 4: be an essay about a humiliating experience I had with

703
00:39:02,719 --> 00:39:04,359
Speaker 4: a Girl Scout just a few days ago.

704
00:39:04,719 --> 00:39:06,520
Speaker 3: What can you talk about it?

705
00:39:06,800 --> 00:39:08,880
Speaker 4: I can, actually it will be the first time that

706
00:39:08,920 --> 00:39:13,760
Speaker 4: I talk about it publicly. I so here in Savannah,

707
00:39:13,840 --> 00:39:19,279
Speaker 4: which coincidentally is the birth of the Girl Scouts. Julie. Yes,

708
00:39:19,600 --> 00:39:23,840
Speaker 4: the Girl Scout founder Juliette Gordon Lowe is from here,

709
00:39:24,360 --> 00:39:28,040
Speaker 4: and horrible, amazing detail about her. I mean she on

710
00:39:28,080 --> 00:39:31,239
Speaker 4: her wedding day, a grain of rice that people were

711
00:39:31,280 --> 00:39:34,200
Speaker 4: throwing in celebration at her in the groom as they

712
00:39:34,200 --> 00:39:37,640
Speaker 4: walked to like a carriage lodged in her ear drum

713
00:39:38,200 --> 00:39:42,359
Speaker 4: and completely like basically she immediately like she it never

714
00:39:42,719 --> 00:39:45,640
Speaker 4: they couldn't get it out. It basically took away her hearing.

715
00:39:45,719 --> 00:39:49,560
Speaker 4: She was like then mostly deaf and it set you

716
00:39:49,640 --> 00:39:51,840
Speaker 4: to and it was like a horrible marriage. But anyway,

717
00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:54,319
Speaker 4: Girl Scouts are from here. Whatever I thought there would

718
00:39:54,320 --> 00:39:57,000
Speaker 4: actually be a lot more Girl Scout visibility there is not. Okay,

719
00:39:57,080 --> 00:39:59,560
Speaker 4: It's like a normal city, which I find disappointing. But

720
00:40:00,640 --> 00:40:03,359
Speaker 4: I was on a jog, I you know, around Forsyth Park,

721
00:40:03,360 --> 00:40:06,160
Speaker 4: which is like their central park, Saturday morning. I see

722
00:40:06,160 --> 00:40:08,320
Speaker 4: a sign in the ground and says Girl Scouts Cookies

723
00:40:08,360 --> 00:40:12,120
Speaker 4: that way okay. So then I follow it and I

724
00:40:12,160 --> 00:40:15,040
Speaker 4: see that there's a little stand and you know, with

725
00:40:15,080 --> 00:40:17,440
Speaker 4: a with a little girl scalp, and she's wearing like

726
00:40:17,480 --> 00:40:21,000
Speaker 4: a huge sash and she's It's like, I've never bought

727
00:40:21,040 --> 00:40:24,520
Speaker 4: cookies from a girl scout. I've only had these like interactions,

728
00:40:24,560 --> 00:40:28,759
Speaker 4: these very like adult joyless interactions where a need is

729
00:40:28,800 --> 00:40:33,239
Speaker 4: being met and there's no like even conversation and an office.

730
00:40:32,960 --> 00:40:35,560
Speaker 3: Like a coworker pressure.

731
00:40:35,680 --> 00:40:37,840
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, I mean not really, they don't have to.

732
00:40:38,000 --> 00:40:44,160
Speaker 4: They all twist my own door. It's more like me

733
00:40:44,280 --> 00:40:47,200
Speaker 4: really being like where can they get them in the building,

734
00:40:47,200 --> 00:40:50,200
Speaker 4: and like try and figure it out. But so I've

735
00:40:50,200 --> 00:40:52,399
Speaker 4: never actually done a live buy, so I was kind

736
00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:54,480
Speaker 4: of excited about like doing it from a girl scout.

737
00:40:54,719 --> 00:40:57,640
Speaker 4: So I had to jog home, get cash, come back,

738
00:40:58,120 --> 00:41:02,840
Speaker 4: get in line. Finally I'm back. And first my mask

739
00:41:02,960 --> 00:41:05,680
Speaker 4: is a little bit of skew, Like my mask is

740
00:41:05,719 --> 00:41:09,319
Speaker 4: a little bit hanging off one here, it's dangling from

741
00:41:09,320 --> 00:41:12,400
Speaker 4: my ear. Fine, and so the girl scout points at

742
00:41:12,440 --> 00:41:14,520
Speaker 4: it and like is giggles and it's like your mask.

743
00:41:15,080 --> 00:41:17,640
Speaker 4: So I was like, okay, this is I hate you

744
00:41:17,719 --> 00:41:19,600
Speaker 4: and this is starting badly. So I fix it, and

745
00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:22,640
Speaker 4: I'm like, on my order is a Samoa's. So I'm like,

746
00:41:22,640 --> 00:41:24,960
Speaker 4: can I get a Samoa's. She gets it for me,

747
00:41:25,120 --> 00:41:28,600
Speaker 4: and then at a certain point she's really she's really cute.

748
00:41:28,640 --> 00:41:31,840
Speaker 4: She's blonde, she's little, she's probably eight. She's a lisp.

749
00:41:32,080 --> 00:41:33,560
Speaker 4: So when I hear that she's a lisp, I'm like,

750
00:41:33,560 --> 00:41:36,160
Speaker 4: oh my god, I can't believe talking to like a

751
00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:38,560
Speaker 4: little girl scout with a lisp. This is like so fun,

752
00:41:38,560 --> 00:41:40,480
Speaker 4: Like I want to hear more. So I just ask

753
00:41:40,520 --> 00:41:43,520
Speaker 4: her what's your favorite flavor? So then she like skips

754
00:41:43,560 --> 00:41:47,160
Speaker 4: around and comes there's like a sneeze guard. She comes

755
00:41:47,160 --> 00:41:49,360
Speaker 4: around to the front next to me. She shows me

756
00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:53,120
Speaker 4: they've got some new s'mores or there's one called toast

757
00:41:53,239 --> 00:41:55,720
Speaker 4: ya that's the new flavor. But her favorite, her favorite

758
00:41:55,760 --> 00:41:57,799
Speaker 4: is smores. And she's like, oh, they're so good, and

759
00:41:57,960 --> 00:42:00,319
Speaker 4: if you just put it in the mic, you might

760
00:42:00,360 --> 00:42:03,840
Speaker 4: get for two seconds that it's all good, like straight

761
00:42:03,920 --> 00:42:05,560
Speaker 4: up like a cartoon darandar. And I was like, oh,

762
00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:08,720
Speaker 4: that's so great. And I thought I was just mimicking

763
00:42:08,760 --> 00:42:12,160
Speaker 4: her enthusiasm in a sort of normal way. I didn't

764
00:42:12,200 --> 00:42:16,440
Speaker 4: think I seemed overly enthusiastic or overly zealous. So then

765
00:42:16,480 --> 00:42:18,040
Speaker 4: I give her the cash and she's like, you want

766
00:42:18,080 --> 00:42:20,080
Speaker 4: to make a donation. I'm like sure, it's a dollar.

767
00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:23,279
Speaker 4: Then she's not giving me the cookies. I think she

768
00:42:23,360 --> 00:42:27,239
Speaker 4: like forgot So I'm like, okay, the cookies. Then I

769
00:42:27,280 --> 00:42:29,360
Speaker 4: think there might have been no affect in my voice

770
00:42:29,400 --> 00:42:32,239
Speaker 4: when I said in a way that I think betrayed

771
00:42:34,400 --> 00:42:38,560
Speaker 4: the urgencies that I felt to get home with the box.

772
00:42:39,160 --> 00:42:43,120
Speaker 4: So then she's like oh. So then she gives me

773
00:42:43,120 --> 00:42:44,879
Speaker 4: the cookies and I'm like thanks, I'm walking away. She's

774
00:42:44,920 --> 00:42:47,560
Speaker 4: like wait. Then I come back, and she comes back

775
00:42:47,560 --> 00:42:51,239
Speaker 4: and she hands me a card and she's like, this

776
00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:53,600
Speaker 4: is my cookie website you can buy you can order

777
00:42:53,640 --> 00:42:55,160
Speaker 4: more for me. And I'm like oh thanks, and she's

778
00:42:55,200 --> 00:42:57,120
Speaker 4: like you look like a perthon who might want more.

779
00:42:59,040 --> 00:43:02,399
Speaker 4: And I was like okay. And then there's a there's

780
00:43:02,440 --> 00:43:04,600
Speaker 4: a middle aged woman behind me who then hears that

781
00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:08,759
Speaker 4: and like starts like goffying, And as the little girl

782
00:43:08,880 --> 00:43:10,719
Speaker 4: Scout is laughing at me and the woman is laughing

783
00:43:10,719 --> 00:43:14,880
Speaker 4: at me, I just turn and leave and and and

784
00:43:14,920 --> 00:43:16,560
Speaker 4: the problem is I have to fucking look her in

785
00:43:16,600 --> 00:43:19,160
Speaker 4: the face tomorrow because I have to go back tomorrow.

786
00:43:19,920 --> 00:43:24,520
Speaker 3: This is incredible, just being harassed by this little devil.

787
00:43:25,239 --> 00:43:27,319
Speaker 4: She knew that it was sort of shaming she she

788
00:43:27,400 --> 00:43:29,879
Speaker 4: totally was old enough to understand. She started to laugh

789
00:43:29,920 --> 00:43:30,680
Speaker 4: as she said it to me.

790
00:43:31,480 --> 00:43:34,200
Speaker 3: I was like, Okay, who is this person?

791
00:43:34,760 --> 00:43:37,920
Speaker 4: I don't know. I wish I could find another location.

792
00:43:38,120 --> 00:43:41,080
Speaker 4: But now I got the taste, So I now.

793
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:42,320
Speaker 3: Did you just get one box?

794
00:43:43,080 --> 00:43:45,160
Speaker 4: I do, because it's like for me, it's like a

795
00:43:45,160 --> 00:43:45,960
Speaker 4: loaded gun in.

796
00:43:45,920 --> 00:43:49,560
Speaker 3: The apart, you know, a bunch. I mean, now pull

797
00:43:49,640 --> 00:43:50,560
Speaker 3: the trigger.

798
00:43:50,400 --> 00:43:54,920
Speaker 4: And exactly exactly. But but no, love them, love those

799
00:43:55,080 --> 00:43:59,080
Speaker 4: and also recently have had have really been there's this

800
00:43:59,120 --> 00:44:00,960
Speaker 4: one that Alison Roman has.

801
00:44:01,080 --> 00:44:02,200
Speaker 3: Oh and I don't know.

802
00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:04,960
Speaker 4: Yes, Allison, I don't know if you know. Alison?

803
00:44:08,120 --> 00:44:10,560
Speaker 3: Wait, what what is which recipe of hers?

804
00:44:10,920 --> 00:44:14,120
Speaker 4: It's actually her It's ginger chocolate molasses.

805
00:44:14,239 --> 00:44:15,960
Speaker 3: Oh. Interesting, it's a.

806
00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:21,080
Speaker 4: Very adult, sophisticated profile. It's it's very intense and almost

807
00:44:21,320 --> 00:44:24,200
Speaker 4: it's like salty and intense. But then I have to

808
00:44:24,200 --> 00:44:26,800
Speaker 4: get my Betty Crocker, my icing tub. I have to

809
00:44:26,920 --> 00:44:33,080
Speaker 4: keep I am going through these so fast it's scary,

810
00:44:33,280 --> 00:44:34,759
Speaker 4: so I choose to ice it.

811
00:44:35,040 --> 00:44:38,680
Speaker 3: So wait, wait, you're icing the Alison Roman cookie.

812
00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:40,200
Speaker 4: I am icing that cookie. Yeah.

813
00:44:40,480 --> 00:44:42,439
Speaker 3: What type of icing are you putting on there?

814
00:44:42,760 --> 00:44:44,160
Speaker 4: Betty Crocker Vanilla?

815
00:44:44,880 --> 00:44:48,600
Speaker 3: Oh oh, I love Yeah, I can't love it. I'm

816
00:44:48,600 --> 00:44:50,279
Speaker 3: going to just quickly look this up so I can

817
00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:52,880
Speaker 3: at least visualize what in the hell is Listen, I

818
00:44:52,960 --> 00:44:53,480
Speaker 3: have the.

819
00:44:53,400 --> 00:44:55,960
Speaker 4: First time that I really got down in dirty with

820
00:44:56,080 --> 00:44:58,759
Speaker 4: this specific icing. It was actually the Ronald McDonald house

821
00:44:58,760 --> 00:45:01,200
Speaker 4: in Pittsburgh. Okay, so I it was voluntary when I

822
00:45:01,480 --> 00:45:03,120
Speaker 4: was there with my friend Sammy. I think it was

823
00:45:03,160 --> 00:45:07,399
Speaker 4: related to my synagogue and we were doing some thing,

824
00:45:07,640 --> 00:45:09,560
Speaker 4: a volunteer thing. But Sammy and I just went in

825
00:45:09,600 --> 00:45:12,200
Speaker 4: the basement and we found a tub of this icing

826
00:45:12,239 --> 00:45:15,719
Speaker 4: and we just ate it. And that was our contribution to.

827
00:45:15,680 --> 00:45:20,040
Speaker 3: Ronald McDonald's, just stealing their frosted, like their.

828
00:45:19,920 --> 00:45:22,360
Speaker 4: Frosting from the children.

829
00:45:24,080 --> 00:45:25,440
Speaker 3: So that's my first time I was.

830
00:45:25,360 --> 00:45:28,640
Speaker 4: Like, this is so fucking good. So Ever since that

831
00:45:28,800 --> 00:45:31,879
Speaker 4: afternoon of the Ronald McDonald house, I craved it and

832
00:45:32,120 --> 00:45:33,799
Speaker 4: oh yeah, Brodjurd, it's it's so.

833
00:45:34,120 --> 00:45:37,839
Speaker 3: Like, Okay, I've now seen the cookie and it makes

834
00:45:37,840 --> 00:45:40,000
Speaker 3: a little more sense to me. I thought you were

835
00:45:40,160 --> 00:45:42,080
Speaker 3: I thought this was some sort of chocolate chip cookie

836
00:45:42,120 --> 00:45:44,640
Speaker 3: that you were dumping frosting, Oliver, It's like a it's

837
00:45:44,640 --> 00:45:46,280
Speaker 3: a one flavor cookie.

838
00:45:46,360 --> 00:45:49,880
Speaker 4: It's a one flavor cookie. And indeed, iced molasses cookies

839
00:45:50,080 --> 00:45:51,800
Speaker 4: are a thing, right, those are.

840
00:45:51,680 --> 00:45:55,440
Speaker 3: A respectable sense. Yeah, sunning level. It's not. You know,

841
00:45:55,920 --> 00:45:59,920
Speaker 3: the thing I was picturing was truly chaotic, and I was.

842
00:46:00,480 --> 00:46:03,080
Speaker 4: Somewhat less chic when I ic it. But then I

843
00:46:03,160 --> 00:46:05,239
Speaker 4: also bring the tub and a knife with me, and

844
00:46:05,280 --> 00:46:10,239
Speaker 4: I sit there and re ic it as I got.

845
00:46:09,239 --> 00:46:11,840
Speaker 3: That frosting is very good. Like if you get I

846
00:46:11,920 --> 00:46:15,120
Speaker 3: like that chocolate, you put that on a gram cracker. Forget,

847
00:46:15,160 --> 00:46:17,480
Speaker 3: that's nice. I love a frosted gram cracker.

848
00:46:17,960 --> 00:46:21,040
Speaker 4: Oh good, Okay, that feels very That feels mormon.

849
00:46:21,120 --> 00:46:24,600
Speaker 3: Actually that does feel very mormon. I mean I think

850
00:46:24,640 --> 00:46:28,480
Speaker 3: any dessert, any sweet that can serve the whole family

851
00:46:28,560 --> 00:46:29,319
Speaker 3: is very more.

852
00:46:29,480 --> 00:46:32,000
Speaker 4: Yes, can serve the whole family. Yes.

853
00:46:33,560 --> 00:46:37,680
Speaker 3: Wait, so you're making you're you're actually baking these cookies, though, I.

854
00:46:37,560 --> 00:46:41,040
Speaker 4: Am, and I keep a lot of the dough frozen.

855
00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:44,640
Speaker 4: And then because I basically am on this schedule where

856
00:46:44,640 --> 00:46:46,960
Speaker 4: it's like I gain probably six pounds every weekend, and

857
00:46:46,960 --> 00:46:49,480
Speaker 4: then I try like hell to lose it during the week,

858
00:46:49,560 --> 00:46:52,839
Speaker 4: and then I do it again, and I'm definitely gonna

859
00:46:52,880 --> 00:46:56,439
Speaker 4: do that until it's over right, right.

860
00:46:56,719 --> 00:47:01,040
Speaker 3: I do want to circle back to Scouts for a minute,

861
00:47:01,120 --> 00:47:03,360
Speaker 3: because I'd like to know if you have like a

862
00:47:03,400 --> 00:47:05,680
Speaker 3: top three or top five of Girl Scout cookies.

863
00:47:05,960 --> 00:47:08,200
Speaker 4: Oh sure, I just have a top two. I mean

864
00:47:08,239 --> 00:47:10,200
Speaker 4: my tippy top is Samoa.

865
00:47:09,920 --> 00:47:11,600
Speaker 3: Okay, and then I really.

866
00:47:11,280 --> 00:47:14,359
Speaker 4: Really really like thin Mints too, and that's where it ends.

867
00:47:14,400 --> 00:47:16,319
Speaker 4: And I have no interest in the other ones. What

868
00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:17,120
Speaker 4: about you?

869
00:47:17,400 --> 00:47:19,839
Speaker 3: I mean, I was gonna say, first of all, this

870
00:47:20,040 --> 00:47:23,200
Speaker 3: awful little girl with this s'more thing, I feel like

871
00:47:23,239 --> 00:47:26,160
Speaker 3: I've had one of those more unless they've unless they've

872
00:47:26,239 --> 00:47:30,240
Speaker 3: changed the recipe. I remember them being garbage. Yeah, okay,

873
00:47:30,280 --> 00:47:33,600
Speaker 3: And again let's let's say, you know, Girl Scouts wonderful.

874
00:47:34,520 --> 00:47:37,160
Speaker 3: What as far as I know, what they're doing is wonderful.

875
00:47:37,920 --> 00:47:39,439
Speaker 3: I haven't looked into it. I don't know if there's

876
00:47:39,440 --> 00:47:40,080
Speaker 3: any darkness.

877
00:47:40,080 --> 00:47:42,960
Speaker 4: I probably like one of those orthodox cars for kid scams,

878
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:45,560
Speaker 4: and it is about and blown. It's got to be

879
00:47:45,600 --> 00:47:48,600
Speaker 4: a scam because it says all on the box, like

880
00:47:48,719 --> 00:47:52,440
Speaker 4: all the things, they're so nebulous, like what the organization

881
00:47:52,680 --> 00:47:55,919
Speaker 4: does it's it's an I think it's orthodox Jewish men

882
00:47:56,640 --> 00:47:59,919
Speaker 4: are well. I just think it's probably similar to cars

883
00:47:59,920 --> 00:48:01,120
Speaker 4: for and we're going to find out.

884
00:48:02,960 --> 00:48:05,320
Speaker 3: All that said, as far as we know, girl Scouts

885
00:48:05,360 --> 00:48:08,600
Speaker 3: are doing wonderful things. That said, I'm not that crazy

886
00:48:08,600 --> 00:48:11,000
Speaker 3: about most of the cookies. I like a thin mint.

887
00:48:11,320 --> 00:48:13,640
Speaker 3: I really eat a frozen thin mint. I don't know

888
00:48:13,640 --> 00:48:15,959
Speaker 3: anyone who doesn't like a thin mint. If you don't

889
00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:18,960
Speaker 3: like it, I don't know what to tell you. And

890
00:48:19,000 --> 00:48:22,640
Speaker 3: then after that, I would probably say I don't think

891
00:48:22,680 --> 00:48:24,400
Speaker 3: I like any of the other ones. To be honest,

892
00:48:24,480 --> 00:48:26,360
Speaker 3: I would love to love a tag along, but I

893
00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:30,640
Speaker 3: feel like they really just fall flat on their face.

894
00:48:30,680 --> 00:48:35,520
Speaker 3: They just taste like four different types of wax. Of

895
00:48:35,640 --> 00:48:37,600
Speaker 3: what other ones are available, there's like the ones.

896
00:48:37,440 --> 00:48:39,400
Speaker 4: That don't like Samoa. That's the one.

897
00:48:39,400 --> 00:48:42,960
Speaker 3: Samoa again is something where I'm like, yes, every element

898
00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:46,520
Speaker 3: here is something I should like. Okay, what is it? Coconut,

899
00:48:46,520 --> 00:48:48,040
Speaker 3: caramel and chocolate?

900
00:48:48,400 --> 00:48:48,840
Speaker 4: Yeah?

901
00:48:48,920 --> 00:48:50,000
Speaker 3: Is there anything else there?

902
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:51,560
Speaker 4: Just a little short bread part.

903
00:48:51,840 --> 00:48:54,320
Speaker 3: All I'm asking is I want to taste these flavors

904
00:48:54,320 --> 00:48:56,520
Speaker 3: more strongly, and I don't feel like I feel like

905
00:48:56,520 --> 00:48:57,640
Speaker 3: I'm just getting sweet.

906
00:48:58,080 --> 00:48:59,560
Speaker 4: What is your number one, my.

907
00:48:59,560 --> 00:49:01,200
Speaker 3: Number one on cookie.

908
00:49:01,320 --> 00:49:04,279
Speaker 4: It over to make, make to make.

909
00:49:04,320 --> 00:49:07,200
Speaker 3: It's a chocolate chip cookie. And now that, of course,

910
00:49:07,840 --> 00:49:11,080
Speaker 3: there are so many different types, you know. I've recently

911
00:49:11,120 --> 00:49:15,200
Speaker 3: been making these ones called their pan banged chocolate chip cookies.

912
00:49:15,280 --> 00:49:18,200
Speaker 3: I read about that the crinkle thing, right, and I

913
00:49:18,239 --> 00:49:21,040
Speaker 3: wish I could remember the baker who kind of made

914
00:49:21,040 --> 00:49:25,879
Speaker 3: them famous. I think Sarah something. I do like making those,

915
00:49:25,920 --> 00:49:29,359
Speaker 3: although they make Jim mad because you know, I'm over

916
00:49:29,400 --> 00:49:35,040
Speaker 3: in the oven slamming this the cookie sheet every two minutes,

917
00:49:35,040 --> 00:49:36,440
Speaker 3: and it's very loud and annoying.

918
00:49:37,520 --> 00:49:42,359
Speaker 4: But how many do you allow yourself at a sitting two?

919
00:49:42,760 --> 00:49:45,080
Speaker 3: I'm making two cookies for myself.

920
00:49:44,760 --> 00:49:47,400
Speaker 4: Each day, lovely, And what's your drink?

921
00:49:47,760 --> 00:49:50,920
Speaker 3: My drink is milk, skim milk.

922
00:49:51,600 --> 00:49:54,719
Speaker 4: Okay, so there we go.

923
00:49:54,920 --> 00:49:55,840
Speaker 3: What is your drink?

924
00:49:56,680 --> 00:50:02,440
Speaker 4: Well, listen, I fucking love whole milk. I my job, Okay,

925
00:50:02,440 --> 00:50:04,560
Speaker 4: So I don't let myself have whole milk all the time,

926
00:50:04,600 --> 00:50:08,080
Speaker 4: because I mean, that is like if I could I

927
00:50:08,160 --> 00:50:10,440
Speaker 4: drink a gallon a day, it's all, it's all I

928
00:50:10,440 --> 00:50:12,799
Speaker 4: want to drink obsessed. I mean, when I have my

929
00:50:13,400 --> 00:50:16,560
Speaker 4: when I am my cookies. Unfortunately, I'm drinking it with

930
00:50:16,640 --> 00:50:19,759
Speaker 4: almond milk because I don't let myself. I can't have

931
00:50:19,920 --> 00:50:22,759
Speaker 4: real milk around. Honestly, a treat for me is on

932
00:50:22,800 --> 00:50:24,839
Speaker 4: the weekends, I will maybe buy a quart of whole

933
00:50:24,840 --> 00:50:28,200
Speaker 4: milk and I'll let myself have it, and it's just.

934
00:50:29,000 --> 00:50:34,080
Speaker 3: Oh god, see the same almond milk. I've tried almond

935
00:50:34,120 --> 00:50:36,480
Speaker 3: milk with a cookie before, and there's like a weird

936
00:50:36,960 --> 00:50:41,319
Speaker 3: almost acidity or something that comes with it, like it

937
00:50:41,320 --> 00:50:43,759
Speaker 3: doesn't pair the way you want it to pare.

938
00:50:44,320 --> 00:50:47,400
Speaker 4: I've just trained myself. It's really not ideal, but I

939
00:50:47,880 --> 00:50:51,800
Speaker 4: drink so much milk until I went until I switched

940
00:50:51,800 --> 00:50:54,600
Speaker 4: to almond milk. You know, I would drink. I would definitely.

941
00:50:54,640 --> 00:50:56,840
Speaker 4: I probably drink a quarter a day of milk. And

942
00:50:56,880 --> 00:50:59,719
Speaker 4: it's not that good for you, you know. So I went

943
00:50:59,760 --> 00:51:04,040
Speaker 4: to and it's not ideal, but I feel less less anxious.

944
00:51:04,200 --> 00:51:06,480
Speaker 3: Okay, maybe it's time for me to make the switch.

945
00:51:06,480 --> 00:51:08,560
Speaker 3: I mean, I had to obviously train myself to like

946
00:51:08,800 --> 00:51:11,560
Speaker 3: skim milk. I mean, we're I think we're the last

947
00:51:11,600 --> 00:51:16,960
Speaker 3: two adults in America ever drinking milk completely.

948
00:51:17,000 --> 00:51:18,960
Speaker 4: And also as a Jewish person, people don't even know

949
00:51:18,960 --> 00:51:20,960
Speaker 4: what I'm talking about I'm like, my dinner that I

950
00:51:20,960 --> 00:51:23,319
Speaker 4: would love is like a glass of milk and like

951
00:51:23,360 --> 00:51:25,879
Speaker 4: a roast beef and cheddar cheese sandwich slathered in mayo.

952
00:51:26,560 --> 00:51:28,399
Speaker 4: And I'm like, I don't know. I well, my dad

953
00:51:28,480 --> 00:51:30,239
Speaker 4: is my dad is Polish Catholic. So I think this

954
00:51:30,360 --> 00:51:33,960
Speaker 4: is a blood because I love mayo and I love

955
00:51:34,000 --> 00:51:39,120
Speaker 4: whole milk. Bloody, just dripping bloody roast beef with cheddared

956
00:51:39,200 --> 00:51:43,400
Speaker 4: cheese and so much mayo, just flushing around with the

957
00:51:43,440 --> 00:51:44,200
Speaker 4: whole milk.

958
00:51:46,760 --> 00:51:50,279
Speaker 3: Sorry, I cannot drink milk with a meal. I can

959
00:51:50,360 --> 00:51:56,720
Speaker 3: drink it with a dessert. I draw the line. Okay, Jenna,

960
00:51:56,880 --> 00:51:57,960
Speaker 3: do you like Arbi's.

961
00:51:58,440 --> 00:52:00,960
Speaker 4: You know it's funny. I I've never had Arbies, and

962
00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:04,439
Speaker 4: I've always had this high you know, this like nose

963
00:52:04,440 --> 00:52:07,040
Speaker 4: in the air attitude about it, just to despite liking

964
00:52:07,080 --> 00:52:10,000
Speaker 4: things that are shitty. So what, I love Arby's.

965
00:52:10,160 --> 00:52:17,719
Speaker 3: I listen. I think Arby's has been so completely unfairly

966
00:52:17,800 --> 00:52:21,080
Speaker 3: maligned over the years. As Yeah, I think this restaurant

967
00:52:21,120 --> 00:52:24,360
Speaker 3: is wonderful. I mean, of course, it's garbage food. It's fast.

968
00:52:24,719 --> 00:52:28,080
Speaker 3: You know you're eating trash, right. I love Arby's. I

969
00:52:28,120 --> 00:52:31,640
Speaker 3: love a roast beef sandwich. I love a curly fry. Oh,

970
00:52:32,600 --> 00:52:33,720
Speaker 3: I don't know what to tell people.

971
00:52:33,800 --> 00:52:36,439
Speaker 4: Okay, everything you just said is amazing. And I don't

972
00:52:36,440 --> 00:52:38,680
Speaker 4: know why I've always turned my nose about Arby's because

973
00:52:38,680 --> 00:52:40,600
Speaker 4: I I like other things that are shitty. I mean

974
00:52:40,800 --> 00:52:43,000
Speaker 4: when I lived when I lived in Chicago, I learned

975
00:52:43,000 --> 00:52:43,840
Speaker 4: about Culver's.

976
00:52:44,400 --> 00:52:49,320
Speaker 3: Okay, now coversusd I've been to Culver's once years and

977
00:52:49,400 --> 00:52:56,400
Speaker 3: years ago, and I came away feeling very sad. I

978
00:52:57,239 --> 00:53:00,200
Speaker 3: ate in the restaurant with a friend and there was

979
00:53:00,200 --> 00:53:04,760
Speaker 3: a weirdness to it. There was something that felt extremely off,

980
00:53:05,440 --> 00:53:07,680
Speaker 3: and I feel like even on the menu there was

981
00:53:07,719 --> 00:53:11,000
Speaker 3: like a quote that said I'm feeling blue, which because

982
00:53:11,040 --> 00:53:13,120
Speaker 3: I think their color is blue or something, but you

983
00:53:13,120 --> 00:53:16,000
Speaker 3: don't want to put that on a fast food restaurant menu.

984
00:53:16,640 --> 00:53:19,919
Speaker 3: People are coming in probably borderline depressed, and they don't

985
00:53:19,920 --> 00:53:23,160
Speaker 3: want to be reminded while they're eating, you know, their

986
00:53:23,160 --> 00:53:24,080
Speaker 3: butter hamburger.

987
00:53:24,360 --> 00:53:25,239
Speaker 4: What city was it is?

988
00:53:25,239 --> 00:53:27,040
Speaker 3: This was in Utah? This was I think the first

989
00:53:27,040 --> 00:53:28,440
Speaker 3: Culver's in Utah.

990
00:53:28,600 --> 00:53:31,320
Speaker 4: WHOA Okay, and what I said something weird, But I

991
00:53:31,400 --> 00:53:32,680
Speaker 4: wonder if it was what you sensed?

992
00:53:32,719 --> 00:53:34,960
Speaker 3: What was weird about it to you. First things first,

993
00:53:34,960 --> 00:53:37,319
Speaker 3: it was brand new, and this was probably two thousand and.

994
00:53:37,239 --> 00:53:40,520
Speaker 4: Six, sparkling, spanky new.

995
00:53:41,120 --> 00:53:45,560
Speaker 3: Yes, brand new, but everything about it, if other than

996
00:53:45,560 --> 00:53:48,000
Speaker 3: the fact that it was extremely clean and new, it

997
00:53:48,040 --> 00:53:50,960
Speaker 3: looked like it could have been nineteen eighty seven.

998
00:53:51,719 --> 00:53:51,959
Speaker 4: Yeah.

999
00:53:52,440 --> 00:53:55,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, like the decor, everything about it. It felt very

1000
00:53:56,160 --> 00:54:01,800
Speaker 3: cluttered and I felt like it closed in and claustrophobic.

1001
00:54:02,360 --> 00:54:05,560
Speaker 3: That lighting was weird, uh, as.

1002
00:54:05,440 --> 00:54:09,319
Speaker 4: Opposed to the Glasston age room at arby What the

1003
00:54:09,360 --> 00:54:13,360
Speaker 4: fuck it's the same, I mean, Bridger, I.

1004
00:54:13,560 --> 00:54:19,400
Speaker 3: Like the beautiful, the flower arrangements of your typical Arby's. Uh,

1005
00:54:19,800 --> 00:54:25,279
Speaker 3: just kind of the open air feel of your Arby's. No,

1006
00:54:25,440 --> 00:54:28,480
Speaker 3: there was something about it that did not sit right

1007
00:54:28,520 --> 00:54:31,040
Speaker 3: with me. Uh, and I think that affected the way

1008
00:54:31,120 --> 00:54:33,000
Speaker 3: I felt about the food.

1009
00:54:33,200 --> 00:54:36,160
Speaker 4: Okay, that that makes sense. I mean mine was weird too.

1010
00:54:36,239 --> 00:54:39,520
Speaker 4: It reminded me of what what used to weird me

1011
00:54:39,520 --> 00:54:41,640
Speaker 4: out about Chick fil A, which I really, of course

1012
00:54:41,880 --> 00:54:45,200
Speaker 4: do try to never patronize. Thank you sometimes, Yes, I

1013
00:54:45,239 --> 00:54:50,799
Speaker 4: mean my you know, for my friends in the community. No,

1014
00:54:50,840 --> 00:54:53,120
Speaker 4: it's it's it's it's so wrong. It's such a bad place.

1015
00:54:53,160 --> 00:54:55,239
Speaker 4: But the teens are so happy there, and it was

1016
00:54:55,280 --> 00:54:57,840
Speaker 4: the same one with my Culvers. It was like it

1017
00:54:57,920 --> 00:55:00,560
Speaker 4: was just it was like these teens and it seemed

1018
00:55:00,600 --> 00:55:02,840
Speaker 4: a little bit like Twilight Zone with like how happy

1019
00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:04,800
Speaker 4: they were and just as they were about the work.

1020
00:55:05,320 --> 00:55:09,399
Speaker 3: Right. Yeah, they're I think Culver's Chick fil A not

1021
00:55:09,440 --> 00:55:12,040
Speaker 3: a not a friend of the podcast, not a friend

1022
00:55:12,080 --> 00:55:14,680
Speaker 3: of any of us, and In and Out are all

1023
00:55:14,719 --> 00:55:17,960
Speaker 3: they all have kind of an extremely chipper employee. Although

1024
00:55:18,000 --> 00:55:22,640
Speaker 3: I will say at an in and Out it feels authentic.

1025
00:55:22,960 --> 00:55:25,680
Speaker 3: I feel like whoever they're I think because in and

1026
00:55:25,719 --> 00:55:28,719
Speaker 3: Out pays Okay, yeah, not incredible, but I feel like

1027
00:55:28,760 --> 00:55:31,000
Speaker 3: they get people who are kind of happy to be working.

1028
00:55:31,680 --> 00:55:34,160
Speaker 4: Sure. Yeah, And I guess as long as like once

1029
00:55:34,520 --> 00:55:36,880
Speaker 4: once like it catches on, like it's the cool place

1030
00:55:36,920 --> 00:55:39,400
Speaker 4: to work. The kids actually want to work there. I

1031
00:55:39,400 --> 00:55:42,479
Speaker 4: mean if they're kids, yeah, and it's sort of fun.

1032
00:55:42,520 --> 00:55:44,239
Speaker 4: But when you're not a kid, it's not.

1033
00:55:44,880 --> 00:55:50,080
Speaker 3: You're feeling blue. You're feeling blue, Jenny, you have a book.

1034
00:55:50,200 --> 00:55:52,480
Speaker 3: I mean, you know this is this podcast is not

1035
00:55:52,600 --> 00:55:55,040
Speaker 3: a late night show. And it feels weird to just

1036
00:55:55,080 --> 00:55:57,360
Speaker 3: bring up a thing that people need to hear about.

1037
00:55:57,400 --> 00:55:59,120
Speaker 3: But I want to talk about your book.

1038
00:55:59,440 --> 00:56:00,560
Speaker 4: Oh my god, it's called.

1039
00:56:00,360 --> 00:56:04,920
Speaker 3: Big Time and it's tremendously funny. Oh sair, it was

1040
00:56:04,920 --> 00:56:10,360
Speaker 3: it a nightmare to write to me, the self control

1041
00:56:10,480 --> 00:56:13,600
Speaker 3: and the work ethic required to write a book, I

1042
00:56:13,640 --> 00:56:15,120
Speaker 3: don't understand how that even works.

1043
00:56:15,840 --> 00:56:19,200
Speaker 4: That is such a great question, because I mean, yes,

1044
00:56:19,480 --> 00:56:23,000
Speaker 4: it was. I mean a lot of writers when they're

1045
00:56:23,000 --> 00:56:25,200
Speaker 4: writing a book. I mean, and this is a short

1046
00:56:25,239 --> 00:56:27,759
Speaker 4: story collection, it's not a novel. But a lot of

1047
00:56:27,760 --> 00:56:30,680
Speaker 4: people will say that they cannot read while they're writing,

1048
00:56:30,760 --> 00:56:32,600
Speaker 4: because you know, they don't want their ready to be influenced.

1049
00:56:33,040 --> 00:56:35,440
Speaker 4: I'm not like that at all. I mean, I am

1050
00:56:35,480 --> 00:56:38,040
Speaker 4: reading things to inspire me. I'm also reading things that

1051
00:56:38,080 --> 00:56:40,680
Speaker 4: are adjacent to If I'm playing with a genre, I'm

1052
00:56:40,680 --> 00:56:42,680
Speaker 4: going to steep myself in that genre and read that

1053
00:56:42,760 --> 00:56:45,640
Speaker 4: kind of shit. But I also, just on a very

1054
00:56:45,880 --> 00:56:48,760
Speaker 4: bare bones level, needed to be reading books to remind

1055
00:56:48,760 --> 00:56:51,440
Speaker 4: myself that it was even possible to write a book,

1056
00:56:51,719 --> 00:56:54,600
Speaker 4: because as I was doing it, it felt so impossible

1057
00:56:54,600 --> 00:56:57,080
Speaker 4: that I had to literally hold a book in my

1058
00:56:57,160 --> 00:57:00,600
Speaker 4: hands and be like someone else did it, Like it

1059
00:57:00,760 --> 00:57:04,239
Speaker 4: can happen. I mean, the challenge, especially for me, was

1060
00:57:04,320 --> 00:57:06,560
Speaker 4: I was coming off of seven years of being in

1061
00:57:06,560 --> 00:57:09,319
Speaker 4: a writer's room, either at The Onion for three years,

1062
00:57:09,520 --> 00:57:13,279
Speaker 4: at Colbert for over four years, and that's like, you know,

1063
00:57:13,640 --> 00:57:15,960
Speaker 4: you're on a staff, you're on the clock, you write

1064
00:57:15,960 --> 00:57:19,280
Speaker 4: with other people. You know, it's so supervised, and you're

1065
00:57:19,280 --> 00:57:23,640
Speaker 4: also of course serving a pre established editorial voice, right,

1066
00:57:23,720 --> 00:57:28,680
Speaker 4: And this was like being unleashed and no rules. And

1067
00:57:28,720 --> 00:57:31,360
Speaker 4: also at both of my old jobs, I kind of

1068
00:57:31,360 --> 00:57:34,280
Speaker 4: had this reputation of oh, don't ask jen if that's

1069
00:57:34,320 --> 00:57:36,880
Speaker 4: too dark, don't ask that her, like if that is

1070
00:57:36,920 --> 00:57:42,520
Speaker 4: actually funny, because my sensibility is so specific and sometimes

1071
00:57:42,560 --> 00:57:47,360
Speaker 4: weird and sometimes dark. And so it was heavy and

1072
00:57:47,480 --> 00:57:52,880
Speaker 4: exciting but also scary to be the boss. And yeah,

1073
00:57:52,920 --> 00:57:55,080
Speaker 4: because no one was telling me no, I couldn't blame

1074
00:57:55,120 --> 00:57:56,120
Speaker 4: it on anybody else.

1075
00:57:56,320 --> 00:57:58,680
Speaker 3: That's the best part about working on a TV show.

1076
00:57:58,800 --> 00:58:00,800
Speaker 3: I mean, if it turns out bad, you just point

1077
00:58:00,800 --> 00:58:03,800
Speaker 3: a finger at someone else or say it was a mess. Look,

1078
00:58:03,840 --> 00:58:04,840
Speaker 3: I did everything.

1079
00:58:04,520 --> 00:58:08,400
Speaker 4: I could, exactly. There's so many people to blame, I mean,

1080
00:58:08,840 --> 00:58:13,880
Speaker 4: all around you and all above you. Absolutely, no, it never,

1081
00:58:14,160 --> 00:58:16,880
Speaker 4: it never has to reflect on you. Yeah, you can

1082
00:58:16,960 --> 00:58:18,000
Speaker 4: just wash your hands of the whole thing.

1083
00:58:18,080 --> 00:58:21,000
Speaker 3: And then if it's a success, you can. As you see,

1084
00:58:21,040 --> 00:58:23,360
Speaker 3: if you watch the Emmys, one person can take all

1085
00:58:23,400 --> 00:58:26,200
Speaker 3: of the credit and you can. You know, there you

1086
00:58:26,240 --> 00:58:29,080
Speaker 3: can either blame everyone or take all of the credit

1087
00:58:29,080 --> 00:58:30,800
Speaker 3: for yourself. It's really a wonderful game.

1088
00:58:31,120 --> 00:58:32,640
Speaker 4: And what are you talking about with the Emmys? What

1089
00:58:32,640 --> 00:58:33,360
Speaker 4: am I forgetting?

1090
00:58:33,480 --> 00:58:35,720
Speaker 3: I'm just talking about in general when someone wins an.

1091
00:58:36,000 --> 00:58:39,640
Speaker 4: Oh exactly, oh my, oh wins Amy. Oh, for some reason,

1092
00:58:39,680 --> 00:58:41,480
Speaker 4: my mind went to writing the Emmys.

1093
00:58:41,160 --> 00:58:44,160
Speaker 3: Only because she took all the credit.

1094
00:58:44,520 --> 00:58:47,280
Speaker 4: Yeh, No, well, I mean I know you guys must have.

1095
00:58:47,440 --> 00:58:49,720
Speaker 4: Jimmy must have posted, you must have written the Emmy's

1096
00:58:49,720 --> 00:58:50,120
Speaker 4: one year.

1097
00:58:50,720 --> 00:58:54,920
Speaker 3: I never while Jimmy while I was at Kimmel. I

1098
00:58:55,000 --> 00:59:00,960
Speaker 3: don't think he hosted anything. Okay, I could be wrong.

1099
00:59:01,200 --> 00:59:06,439
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, but yeah. It's uh, when you're writing a book,

1100
00:59:06,480 --> 00:59:08,960
Speaker 3: your name's just there on the front, exactly.

1101
00:59:09,200 --> 00:59:11,240
Speaker 4: It's I mean, it's what stand ups say where it's

1102
00:59:11,320 --> 00:59:14,880
Speaker 4: like it's all the glory. But then I mean the

1103
00:59:15,560 --> 00:59:20,880
Speaker 4: if it's bad, then that failure is so exquisitely yours, right,

1104
00:59:20,880 --> 00:59:23,920
Speaker 4: and that is then that's bad.

1105
00:59:24,360 --> 00:59:26,200
Speaker 3: Have we even said the name of the book it's

1106
00:59:26,200 --> 00:59:27,200
Speaker 3: called Have I said big time?

1107
00:59:28,560 --> 00:59:31,040
Speaker 4: Yes, you said it honey, it's called Big Time. You

1108
00:59:31,080 --> 00:59:32,200
Speaker 4: said it, You said it again.

1109
00:59:32,440 --> 00:59:34,680
Speaker 3: I feel like it would almost be more difficult to

1110
00:59:34,800 --> 00:59:38,480
Speaker 3: write a short stories collection because you get to the

1111
00:59:38,520 --> 00:59:41,400
Speaker 3: end of one short story, you're not building on it.

1112
00:59:41,440 --> 00:59:44,360
Speaker 3: You know, you're writing a novel. You know, there's a

1113
00:59:44,360 --> 00:59:46,560
Speaker 3: beginning and an end you have to think of. I mean,

1114
00:59:46,560 --> 00:59:50,760
Speaker 3: how many stories are in your book? Fifteen fourteen four? Oh,

1115
00:59:50,800 --> 00:59:53,840
Speaker 3: I'm very I'm excellent. Yes there, yeah, yeah, there are

1116
00:59:54,120 --> 00:59:57,360
Speaker 3: fourteen beginnings and ends. That's and two at least two

1117
00:59:57,400 --> 01:00:02,240
Speaker 3: of them are long novella well almost length stories.

1118
01:00:02,600 --> 01:00:04,960
Speaker 4: Yes, you know what. The title story, big Time, I

1119
01:00:04,960 --> 01:00:08,000
Speaker 4: think actually is a novella. It's definitely over one hundred pages.

1120
01:00:08,480 --> 01:00:11,160
Speaker 4: One of the longer stories, which is called The Boyfriend

1121
01:00:11,200 --> 01:00:13,040
Speaker 4: Identity is actually, I don't think I've told you this.

1122
01:00:13,080 --> 01:00:14,880
Speaker 4: It's going to be The New Yorker is going to

1123
01:00:14,920 --> 01:00:17,560
Speaker 4: run it in parts there I don't know. Yeah, they're

1124
01:00:17,560 --> 01:00:19,440
Speaker 4: doing an exit and they're serializing it. I know.

1125
01:00:19,600 --> 01:00:20,160
Speaker 3: That's great.

1126
01:00:20,560 --> 01:00:22,200
Speaker 4: I know, so that'll be neat. So that's going to

1127
01:00:22,240 --> 01:00:24,760
Speaker 4: be online. But yeah, I mean, you're I mean, I

1128
01:00:24,800 --> 01:00:27,760
Speaker 4: think it's it's funny because now I'm starting to sketch

1129
01:00:27,800 --> 01:00:32,320
Speaker 4: out a novel, and my impulse is to just I mean,

1130
01:00:32,560 --> 01:00:35,040
Speaker 4: the beauty of the short stories is that like you

1131
01:00:35,080 --> 01:00:37,439
Speaker 4: get to play in different worlds, you get to put

1132
01:00:37,480 --> 01:00:41,000
Speaker 4: it down and then you get to try something completely new,

1133
01:00:41,080 --> 01:00:44,240
Speaker 4: and so like there's just like extreme freedom there. But

1134
01:00:44,760 --> 01:00:47,680
Speaker 4: I think that then the trade off is whatever. I mean,

1135
01:00:47,760 --> 01:00:50,560
Speaker 4: not that like novels should have fat, not that they

1136
01:00:50,600 --> 01:00:54,480
Speaker 4: should have pointless digressions, you know, but it seems like

1137
01:00:54,520 --> 01:00:56,720
Speaker 4: a lot of them, do you know, And it seems

1138
01:00:56,760 --> 01:00:59,520
Speaker 4: like there's like that's actually almost like the pace is

1139
01:00:59,520 --> 01:01:01,920
Speaker 4: so much slower, it's such a slower burn.

1140
01:01:01,840 --> 01:01:05,840
Speaker 5: That it almost allows for fat all over the place, right,

1141
01:01:05,880 --> 01:01:08,120
Speaker 5: I mean, the novel is like the last medium where

1142
01:01:08,160 --> 01:01:10,760
Speaker 5: you can just kind of do whatever you want, not

1143
01:01:10,800 --> 01:01:12,600
Speaker 5: worry about can we produce this?

1144
01:01:13,000 --> 01:01:15,560
Speaker 3: Will this? Yes, you can go in any direction. I

1145
01:01:15,600 --> 01:01:20,160
Speaker 3: mean it might fail, but you can go in any

1146
01:01:20,160 --> 01:01:21,720
Speaker 3: direction you want for as long as you want and

1147
01:01:21,720 --> 01:01:24,560
Speaker 3: then head back to the story. It's and that's what's

1148
01:01:24,600 --> 01:01:26,560
Speaker 3: beautiful or terrible about a novel.

1149
01:01:27,040 --> 01:01:31,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, I mean I agree, you can do whatever

1150
01:01:31,400 --> 01:01:34,840
Speaker 4: you want. It seems like there's more leeway for having

1151
01:01:34,840 --> 01:01:38,200
Speaker 4: a novel not work, you know, I mean, I do

1152
01:01:38,280 --> 01:01:41,640
Speaker 4: read so many contemporary things, and sometimes I'm like, gee,

1153
01:01:41,680 --> 01:01:45,000
Speaker 4: like this just isn't working for me, but I guess,

1154
01:01:45,200 --> 01:01:48,920
Speaker 4: but it's considered to be something that's incredibly successful. But

1155
01:01:49,040 --> 01:01:51,920
Speaker 4: with a short story, you just don't have the leeway.

1156
01:01:52,120 --> 01:01:57,560
Speaker 4: I mean, there can't be these pointless digressions or you know,

1157
01:01:57,680 --> 01:02:00,520
Speaker 4: so in that way, it does kind of you to

1158
01:02:00,520 --> 01:02:01,840
Speaker 4: like figure out what you're doing.

1159
01:02:01,880 --> 01:02:05,120
Speaker 3: And I mean, well, the book's wonderful. It's so funny.

1160
01:02:05,280 --> 01:02:08,160
Speaker 3: I mean, it's everybody needs to read this book. It's

1161
01:02:08,520 --> 01:02:12,720
Speaker 3: my feeling on especially in humor, short stories frequently can

1162
01:02:12,760 --> 01:02:16,440
Speaker 3: be clever and not funny. Jen Spiro writes a short

1163
01:02:16,440 --> 01:02:20,200
Speaker 3: story that is both clever and just like on a

1164
01:02:20,320 --> 01:02:24,480
Speaker 3: very deep physical level funny, the sort of thing that

1165
01:02:24,520 --> 01:02:27,680
Speaker 3: makes you laugh out loud rather than smirk. And I

1166
01:02:27,800 --> 01:02:30,640
Speaker 3: need comedy that makes me laugh. So it's uh, I

1167
01:02:30,640 --> 01:02:34,760
Speaker 3: can't recommend it enough. It's also just wild, a wild

1168
01:02:34,800 --> 01:02:35,840
Speaker 3: collection of stories.

1169
01:02:35,960 --> 01:02:39,840
Speaker 4: It is wild. Albridger, I'm so glad. I mean, though

1170
01:02:39,920 --> 01:02:42,000
Speaker 4: laughing out loud is so special because I also do

1171
01:02:42,040 --> 01:02:45,880
Speaker 4: it so unfrequently. But when you texted me one of

1172
01:02:45,920 --> 01:02:49,720
Speaker 4: the lines from one of the Wilder stories, shockingly, that

1173
01:02:49,800 --> 01:02:52,760
Speaker 4: story is one of the wildest. It's called The Birthday Girl,

1174
01:02:52,760 --> 01:02:56,600
Speaker 4: and it's about oh thank you. I mean, it's just

1175
01:02:56,640 --> 01:02:59,800
Speaker 4: about a crazy birthday weekend. I like making fun of

1176
01:02:59,800 --> 01:03:03,120
Speaker 4: them because I am actually a crazy birthday girl and I.

1177
01:03:03,440 --> 01:03:04,960
Speaker 3: Didn't know sad about you.

1178
01:03:04,960 --> 01:03:09,000
Speaker 4: You know, It's more I don't actually rope people into

1179
01:03:09,040 --> 01:03:13,680
Speaker 4: some crazy party. But invariably it's never enough. No one

1180
01:03:13,720 --> 01:03:18,400
Speaker 4: did enough. I'm mad at everyone. No one celebrated me enough,

1181
01:03:18,720 --> 01:03:21,800
Speaker 4: and I'm disgusted that I'm like that. So it was

1182
01:03:22,120 --> 01:03:25,280
Speaker 4: it's a very wild birth thirty fourth birthday celebration that

1183
01:03:25,320 --> 01:03:28,800
Speaker 4: happens on an island the story. But amazingly Richard, even

1184
01:03:28,800 --> 01:03:30,320
Speaker 4: though that one's fucking insane, that was one of the

1185
01:03:30,360 --> 01:03:32,080
Speaker 4: stories I was really scared to show to my editor

1186
01:03:32,080 --> 01:03:34,160
Speaker 4: because I was like, this is crazy. I think he's

1187
01:03:34,200 --> 01:03:36,520
Speaker 4: gonna I think he's gonna like rethink this with me.

1188
01:03:36,880 --> 01:03:38,720
Speaker 4: But then that is the one that people like, and

1189
01:03:38,720 --> 01:03:41,280
Speaker 4: they don't even have to be weird, like normal people

1190
01:03:41,760 --> 01:03:44,640
Speaker 4: who I don't even think would like something so fucking

1191
01:03:44,720 --> 01:03:47,920
Speaker 4: crazy and dark, they're into it.

1192
01:03:47,640 --> 01:03:51,440
Speaker 3: It really goes like from the first page of that

1193
01:03:51,520 --> 01:03:54,440
Speaker 3: story just goes at one thousand miles an hour and

1194
01:03:54,560 --> 01:03:58,080
Speaker 3: just escalates like, it doesn't feel like I could escalate

1195
01:03:58,120 --> 01:04:00,760
Speaker 3: any further than it does. And it's incredible.

1196
01:04:00,880 --> 01:04:04,080
Speaker 4: I do try to keep the steaks just ratcheting up.

1197
01:04:05,120 --> 01:04:08,560
Speaker 4: That's that is fun. I mean, like the writers I

1198
01:04:08,560 --> 01:04:11,240
Speaker 4: love the most do that, and that's a good thing

1199
01:04:11,280 --> 01:04:11,520
Speaker 4: to do.

1200
01:04:11,760 --> 01:04:14,240
Speaker 3: Now, Jen, I don't want to you know, I've calmed

1201
01:04:14,240 --> 01:04:16,200
Speaker 3: down from the other gift. I just want to know

1202
01:04:16,240 --> 01:04:17,800
Speaker 3: what the second thing was that.

1203
01:04:18,320 --> 01:04:20,640
Speaker 4: Okay, I'm so glad you asked the thing is I

1204
01:04:20,640 --> 01:04:22,680
Speaker 4: I really was starting to as soon as I sent

1205
01:04:22,760 --> 01:04:23,880
Speaker 4: it to you, I was like, oh my god, is

1206
01:04:23,880 --> 01:04:25,800
Speaker 4: this going to be so weird. I took the gift

1207
01:04:25,840 --> 01:04:28,240
Speaker 4: too seriously because obviously it's lame to give you a

1208
01:04:28,280 --> 01:04:31,640
Speaker 4: real gift, and that is that is what I did. Lame. No,

1209
01:04:31,800 --> 01:04:33,520
Speaker 4: it is you've got to give you like an aspar

1210
01:04:33,800 --> 01:04:36,720
Speaker 4: You've got to give you like three sprigs of asparagus

1211
01:04:36,720 --> 01:04:38,240
Speaker 4: that like I grew in my backyard. And then we

1212
01:04:38,240 --> 01:04:41,919
Speaker 4: talked about theseparagus. Okay, So what this actually was. It's

1213
01:04:41,920 --> 01:04:45,640
Speaker 4: so ridgard. It's a it's a it's a money clip

1214
01:04:45,720 --> 01:04:49,320
Speaker 4: that's engraved Okay, okay, And it's a money clip that's

1215
01:04:49,360 --> 01:04:52,720
Speaker 4: engraved with I think that it's just Bridger, baby, I

1216
01:04:52,880 --> 01:04:54,080
Speaker 4: need you, love Jen.

1217
01:04:57,640 --> 01:05:00,240
Speaker 3: That's beautiful, but that's just lost in the may.

1218
01:05:00,000 --> 01:05:01,360
Speaker 1: No, it can't be.

1219
01:05:01,640 --> 01:05:03,800
Speaker 4: I bet it's coming to you. I mean, like I will.

1220
01:05:04,120 --> 01:05:07,040
Speaker 4: I will obviously track it now. I I because it

1221
01:05:07,080 --> 01:05:09,680
Speaker 4: was definitely supposed to get there. But I mean, don't worry.

1222
01:05:09,720 --> 01:05:11,880
Speaker 4: It's not like silver or something, you know it's from.

1223
01:05:12,000 --> 01:05:12,920
Speaker 4: It's from some website.

1224
01:05:13,680 --> 01:05:14,080
Speaker 3: Dollars.

1225
01:05:15,480 --> 01:05:21,240
Speaker 4: Oh my god. No, But I just I thought, I've

1226
01:05:21,280 --> 01:05:23,280
Speaker 4: never bought a money clip for a man before, but

1227
01:05:23,400 --> 01:05:26,840
Speaker 4: I just was like, I could see you almost having

1228
01:05:26,840 --> 01:05:27,560
Speaker 4: a money clip.

1229
01:05:27,760 --> 01:05:30,080
Speaker 3: I would I mean, if that came into my life,

1230
01:05:30,280 --> 01:05:33,880
Speaker 3: I would drain my savings account into cash and have

1231
01:05:34,000 --> 01:05:36,080
Speaker 3: it all in that money clip.

1232
01:05:36,440 --> 01:05:39,560
Speaker 4: No, no, it's coming to you, honey. I'm getting you there. Okay,

1233
01:05:39,600 --> 01:05:43,040
Speaker 4: it's it's bought bag for go.

1234
01:05:44,600 --> 01:05:47,920
Speaker 3: Oh that's incredible. That's really true. But this, this cookie

1235
01:05:47,920 --> 01:05:50,080
Speaker 3: book is fantastic. I'm so excited.

1236
01:05:50,120 --> 01:05:53,480
Speaker 4: I'm so glad. There were other ones that were hipper

1237
01:05:53,520 --> 01:05:55,760
Speaker 4: and a little more interesting. But then I thought, I

1238
01:05:55,800 --> 01:05:57,800
Speaker 4: cannot I cannot get you Martha.

1239
01:05:58,000 --> 01:06:02,120
Speaker 3: But I mean, Martha, Martha is such a solid pick.

1240
01:06:02,160 --> 01:06:05,720
Speaker 3: You can count on Martha. She's not going to you know,

1241
01:06:05,960 --> 01:06:10,120
Speaker 3: let you down with her recipes. She's not a trend chaser.

1242
01:06:10,400 --> 01:06:14,320
Speaker 3: She's Martha. She knows what she's doing. She assembles the

1243
01:06:14,360 --> 01:06:17,200
Speaker 3: team and gets the recipes. Jen, it's time to play

1244
01:06:17,200 --> 01:06:21,720
Speaker 3: a game. Do you want to play? Do you want

1245
01:06:21,760 --> 01:06:24,560
Speaker 3: to play a game called Gift or a Curse or

1246
01:06:24,560 --> 01:06:26,000
Speaker 3: a game called Gift Master?

1247
01:06:27,280 --> 01:06:28,960
Speaker 4: Wait? I know Gift or a Curse, but I don't

1248
01:06:29,080 --> 01:06:32,560
Speaker 4: know Gift Master. I'm scared. Can I know what Gift

1249
01:06:32,560 --> 01:06:34,000
Speaker 4: Master is and then make my choice?

1250
01:06:34,120 --> 01:06:37,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, of course Gift Master, which, by the way, is

1251
01:06:37,040 --> 01:06:39,200
Speaker 3: now a home there's a home version. It was sold

1252
01:06:39,200 --> 01:06:41,360
Speaker 3: out at some point. Hopefully it'll be back in stock soon.

1253
01:06:41,840 --> 01:06:45,040
Speaker 3: But uh, it's a game where I name three celebrities,

1254
01:06:45,640 --> 01:06:48,720
Speaker 3: three famous people, and then three gifts that you can

1255
01:06:48,760 --> 01:06:50,400
Speaker 3: give them, and you have to tell me which gift

1256
01:06:50,440 --> 01:06:51,480
Speaker 3: you'll give which celebrity.

1257
01:06:51,640 --> 01:06:55,800
Speaker 4: Oh that's good shit, Okay, I'll do gift Master.

1258
01:06:55,960 --> 01:06:58,080
Speaker 3: Okay, we're playing Gift Master. I need a number between

1259
01:06:58,120 --> 01:06:59,000
Speaker 3: one and ten from you.

1260
01:06:59,440 --> 01:06:59,760
Speaker 4: Seven.

1261
01:07:00,080 --> 01:07:02,600
Speaker 3: Okay, seven is the number. I have to do some calculating.

1262
01:07:02,920 --> 01:07:05,120
Speaker 3: This is the time. We've already talked about the book.

1263
01:07:05,160 --> 01:07:06,560
Speaker 3: But if you want to promote it more, you can

1264
01:07:06,560 --> 01:07:09,600
Speaker 3: do that. You can promote something else. You can just

1265
01:07:09,800 --> 01:07:14,800
Speaker 3: rip into somebody, you can spread a rumor. You can

1266
01:07:14,880 --> 01:07:16,600
Speaker 3: do whatever you want. I'll be right back.

1267
01:07:16,840 --> 01:07:19,440
Speaker 4: Okay, well, I guess I actually can. What I can

1268
01:07:19,480 --> 01:07:23,360
Speaker 4: plug is my audio book. The audiobook version of Big

1269
01:07:23,400 --> 01:07:26,720
Speaker 4: Time is going to be sick. I got some same

1270
01:07:26,760 --> 01:07:30,720
Speaker 4: people to read stories. The actor Dan Stevens. Yes, that

1271
01:07:30,880 --> 01:07:36,320
Speaker 4: Dan Stevens. He's absolutely unbelievable, unreal. He's in legion. He

1272
01:07:36,400 --> 01:07:40,200
Speaker 4: was cousin Matthew and Downton Abbey. Also Lauren Lapkis and

1273
01:07:40,320 --> 01:07:45,240
Speaker 4: Matt Rogers and me and Thomas Whittington. We're all reading stories.

1274
01:07:45,320 --> 01:07:49,720
Speaker 4: So I am really psyched about the audio book. And

1275
01:07:49,880 --> 01:07:54,320
Speaker 4: that's pretty much it. Just this book Big Time, Wait

1276
01:07:54,360 --> 01:07:55,800
Speaker 4: for sure. I'm sorry. I thought I actually ended in

1277
01:07:55,800 --> 01:07:57,440
Speaker 4: a full time, but I realized I didn't.

1278
01:07:57,800 --> 01:08:02,000
Speaker 3: You can do whatever you want. I'm still calculating.

1279
01:08:02,760 --> 01:08:07,560
Speaker 4: I'm not dum look like a thirsty money grobbing little.

1280
01:08:10,680 --> 01:08:13,960
Speaker 3: Leave me alone. I'm calculating here. I've got to get

1281
01:08:14,000 --> 01:08:19,400
Speaker 3: the results. Okay, I'm closing in. I've got the gifts now,

1282
01:08:19,400 --> 01:08:21,280
Speaker 3: I've just got to get the celebrities. So just give

1283
01:08:21,320 --> 01:08:25,640
Speaker 3: me who knows how much longer? Oh God, what have

1284
01:08:25,680 --> 01:08:28,000
Speaker 3: I done? This is the longest it's ever taken.

1285
01:08:29,640 --> 01:08:32,080
Speaker 4: I love that you're really figuring out now.

1286
01:08:32,520 --> 01:08:35,880
Speaker 3: I just I accidentally posted a picture into the document,

1287
01:08:36,080 --> 01:08:39,440
Speaker 3: which is not what I'm.

1288
01:08:39,120 --> 01:08:42,599
Speaker 4: I want all of your listeners to know that Bridger

1289
01:08:42,760 --> 01:08:47,320
Speaker 4: is wearing a cool sort of little geometric patterned blouse

1290
01:08:47,360 --> 01:08:51,479
Speaker 4: today and his eyes perfectly match is. I realized that

1291
01:08:51,520 --> 01:08:53,599
Speaker 4: it sort of sounds homophobic that I said blouse. It's

1292
01:08:53,600 --> 01:08:59,000
Speaker 4: just a shirt. He's not wearing like stuffed brawl with

1293
01:08:59,080 --> 01:09:02,559
Speaker 4: it or something. It's just his shirt. His eyes are

1294
01:09:02,640 --> 01:09:03,280
Speaker 4: so blue.

1295
01:09:03,720 --> 01:09:07,519
Speaker 3: Okay, I have I have done the calculating. Are you

1296
01:09:07,600 --> 01:09:08,719
Speaker 3: ready for the game?

1297
01:09:09,200 --> 01:09:09,760
Speaker 4: Yes? I am.

1298
01:09:09,920 --> 01:09:12,400
Speaker 3: I cannot believe how long that took. I'm not going

1299
01:09:12,439 --> 01:09:13,400
Speaker 3: to apologize.

1300
01:09:13,439 --> 01:09:15,160
Speaker 4: Wait, Bridgard, your eyes are blue?

1301
01:09:15,240 --> 01:09:15,439
Speaker 1: Right what?

1302
01:09:15,680 --> 01:09:17,920
Speaker 4: I never knew how blue they were? But are they not?

1303
01:09:18,120 --> 01:09:21,760
Speaker 3: My eyes are blue? And here you are saying I'm

1304
01:09:21,800 --> 01:09:24,840
Speaker 3: wearing blouse a flowy top.

1305
01:09:25,680 --> 01:09:26,679
Speaker 4: It's not flowy.

1306
01:09:27,479 --> 01:09:30,360
Speaker 3: Jen comes on the podcast to say I'm wearing a dress.

1307
01:09:30,080 --> 01:09:34,400
Speaker 3: She hates the gay community. That's the only thing we've

1308
01:09:34,439 --> 01:09:35,200
Speaker 3: been able to figure out.

1309
01:09:35,400 --> 01:09:40,600
Speaker 4: Got chick flay in my left hand, chicklad.

1310
01:09:39,800 --> 01:09:42,439
Speaker 3: Okay, this is the game. Gift master, I'm going to

1311
01:09:42,479 --> 01:09:44,760
Speaker 3: tell you the three gifts. The three gifts you'll be

1312
01:09:44,760 --> 01:09:48,320
Speaker 3: playing with today are number one, the power of flight.

1313
01:09:49,080 --> 01:09:52,519
Speaker 3: Number two, here we go a vending machine. Now, that

1314
01:09:52,520 --> 01:09:54,639
Speaker 3: could be a vending machine, any type of vending machine

1315
01:09:54,680 --> 01:09:59,120
Speaker 3: you want, cigarettes, candy, soda, pop. And finally, the other

1316
01:09:59,200 --> 01:10:03,840
Speaker 3: gift is a bag of chicken breasts. So those are

1317
01:10:03,880 --> 01:10:05,760
Speaker 3: the three gifts you're going to be giving to the

1318
01:10:05,840 --> 01:10:07,240
Speaker 3: following celebrities.

1319
01:10:07,320 --> 01:10:08,559
Speaker 4: Wait, what's the power of flight?

1320
01:10:09,000 --> 01:10:11,719
Speaker 3: The power of flight is the person will be able

1321
01:10:11,760 --> 01:10:13,840
Speaker 3: to fly through the air whenever they want.

1322
01:10:14,160 --> 01:10:15,880
Speaker 4: Oh, the actual power. I thought that was like maybe

1323
01:10:15,920 --> 01:10:17,120
Speaker 4: like a book by Brene Brown.

1324
01:10:23,200 --> 01:10:30,080
Speaker 3: Place. Okay, the celebrities you're giving them too are none

1325
01:10:30,160 --> 01:10:37,760
Speaker 3: other than Neil Young. Okay, now Timbaland, super super producer, Timbaland,

1326
01:10:38,240 --> 01:10:40,080
Speaker 3: and Bristol Palin.

1327
01:10:40,920 --> 01:10:45,439
Speaker 4: Oh thank god, you said Bristol. Thank god I was worried. Okay, So,

1328
01:10:45,880 --> 01:10:48,000
Speaker 4: first of all, Neil Young absolutely must have the bag

1329
01:10:48,040 --> 01:10:52,360
Speaker 4: of chicken breasts because he is older and he's beginning

1330
01:10:52,400 --> 01:10:55,760
Speaker 4: to atrophy. So we need to keep him upright and

1331
01:10:55,800 --> 01:10:58,519
Speaker 4: we need to keep him filled out. So I would

1332
01:10:58,720 --> 01:11:03,080
Speaker 4: I would fed X one night in those those chickens.

1333
01:11:03,520 --> 01:11:07,400
Speaker 4: So then I've got the power the actual power flight and'

1334
01:11:07,520 --> 01:11:12,559
Speaker 4: wait what's the Oh that's really good. Okay, let's see

1335
01:11:13,080 --> 01:11:16,439
Speaker 4: that's hard. Okay, let's go for what do I want

1336
01:11:16,479 --> 01:11:19,680
Speaker 4: to give Bristol. I'm going to give Bristol. I'll give

1337
01:11:19,720 --> 01:11:24,000
Speaker 4: Bristol the power of flight because I think she needs

1338
01:11:24,120 --> 01:11:28,320
Speaker 4: a break, okay, And I think that would be an

1339
01:11:28,400 --> 01:11:31,400
Speaker 4: awesome break. And I think that it's like, you know,

1340
01:11:32,000 --> 01:11:35,800
Speaker 4: you've taken your Knox and then hopefully you get some windfalls,

1341
01:11:35,880 --> 01:11:38,320
Speaker 4: and so I think I think she'd have fun. I

1342
01:11:38,360 --> 01:11:42,160
Speaker 4: think the power flight, I mean could be cool because wait,

1343
01:11:42,280 --> 01:11:44,400
Speaker 4: what was his name? What was the ex husband's name?

1344
01:11:44,960 --> 01:11:47,800
Speaker 3: Levi Johnston? Levi Johnston?

1345
01:11:47,840 --> 01:11:50,160
Speaker 4: We all knew that. Yeah, I mean I want her

1346
01:11:50,200 --> 01:11:53,559
Speaker 4: to be able to I see Levi as being someone

1347
01:11:53,600 --> 01:11:58,080
Speaker 4: who could be a threat, and I want her to

1348
01:11:58,120 --> 01:12:01,280
Speaker 4: be able to fly, fly away, fly away from her,

1349
01:12:01,360 --> 01:12:04,680
Speaker 4: fly away from her crazy mom. And I just I

1350
01:12:04,680 --> 01:12:06,800
Speaker 4: think she has a lot to fly from. So I

1351
01:12:06,840 --> 01:12:08,680
Speaker 4: think that that could work for her. And then so

1352
01:12:08,720 --> 01:12:11,360
Speaker 4: I guess, so Timberlan just gets the venting machine and

1353
01:12:11,600 --> 01:12:15,400
Speaker 4: I see him enjoying snacks and portable food.

1354
01:12:15,640 --> 01:12:18,479
Speaker 3: Oh, I feel like Timberland has absolutely loves a.

1355
01:12:18,439 --> 01:12:20,840
Speaker 4: Snack totally, and I guess I see Timberland in the

1356
01:12:20,840 --> 01:12:23,000
Speaker 4: studio and so I to It's so normal to see

1357
01:12:23,080 --> 01:12:25,479
Speaker 4: him with like a bag of pretzels, right, and a

1358
01:12:25,520 --> 01:12:28,000
Speaker 4: can of something, and that feels natural for him.

1359
01:12:28,040 --> 01:12:31,639
Speaker 3: He wants to pop out and get some free does

1360
01:12:31,800 --> 01:12:35,000
Speaker 3: he wants? You know, Fifth Avenue? Do they still make

1361
01:12:35,040 --> 01:12:37,280
Speaker 3: Fifth Avenues? It's hard to say.

1362
01:12:37,680 --> 01:12:38,960
Speaker 4: Er did you love those?

1363
01:12:39,000 --> 01:12:41,320
Speaker 3: That's so you Fifth Avenue?

1364
01:12:41,479 --> 01:12:42,360
Speaker 4: Fifth Avenue?

1365
01:12:42,840 --> 01:12:47,479
Speaker 3: God, So, I've always been a fifth Fifth Avenue person.

1366
01:12:47,600 --> 01:12:49,800
Speaker 3: I didn't like it, don't I'm not crazy about a butterfinger,

1367
01:12:49,840 --> 01:12:52,519
Speaker 3: but you know, the Fifth Avenue worked for me.

1368
01:12:52,920 --> 01:12:54,960
Speaker 4: Yeah? Were they exactly the same?

1369
01:12:55,080 --> 01:12:57,080
Speaker 3: I think that they were like competing bars. It was

1370
01:12:57,160 --> 01:13:00,640
Speaker 3: kind of a coke pepsi situation. I think that the

1371
01:13:00,680 --> 01:13:03,879
Speaker 3: Fifth Avenue had more of a peanut butter flavor. Okay,

1372
01:13:04,120 --> 01:13:07,480
Speaker 3: I could be wrong. This was probably thirty years ago.

1373
01:13:07,680 --> 01:13:10,120
Speaker 3: But yeah, Timbaland gets the vending machine. I think you

1374
01:13:10,160 --> 01:13:12,800
Speaker 3: did a very good job there. I feel like there's

1375
01:13:12,800 --> 01:13:15,640
Speaker 3: a lot of compassion behind that gift giving, and I

1376
01:13:15,680 --> 01:13:19,599
Speaker 3: think that that is a real key. When you've got Bristol,

1377
01:13:19,640 --> 01:13:23,880
Speaker 3: you've got Timbaland, and you've got Neil. Neil has always

1378
01:13:23,880 --> 01:13:27,599
Speaker 3: looked like he could use a few extra chicken breasts. He's,

1379
01:13:27,800 --> 01:13:30,439
Speaker 3: you know, God blessed. But the man looks gaunt. He

1380
01:13:30,479 --> 01:13:33,679
Speaker 3: looks like he's got a nutritional imbalance or something.

1381
01:13:33,960 --> 01:13:35,920
Speaker 4: I mean, buy a new body, dude, you got the

1382
01:13:35,960 --> 01:13:37,599
Speaker 4: money raft.

1383
01:13:37,760 --> 01:13:42,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, Jen, Okay, we've got to move on. This is

1384
01:13:42,840 --> 01:13:45,400
Speaker 3: the final segment of the podcast. This is called I

1385
01:13:45,479 --> 01:13:48,640
Speaker 3: Said No Emails. People are writing into I Said No

1386
01:13:48,760 --> 01:13:51,120
Speaker 3: Gifts at gmail dot com is where they're writing to.

1387
01:13:51,640 --> 01:13:55,360
Speaker 3: Let's answer some questions. This first one says, this person

1388
01:13:55,479 --> 01:13:59,439
Speaker 3: is just off the bat, just really you know, kissing

1389
01:13:59,479 --> 01:14:05,080
Speaker 3: assow Bridger and equally talented and wonderful guest. They're talking

1390
01:14:05,080 --> 01:14:08,840
Speaker 3: about you, Jen. I own and ride horses, despite having

1391
01:14:08,880 --> 01:14:11,479
Speaker 3: no facility to do so. So I have taken up

1392
01:14:11,520 --> 01:14:14,519
Speaker 3: going to a neighboring property that does with the okay,

1393
01:14:14,680 --> 01:14:16,600
Speaker 3: with the permission of the tenants, so this person is

1394
01:14:16,600 --> 01:14:20,640
Speaker 3: not illegally riding horses. Recently, the tenants moved out and

1395
01:14:20,680 --> 01:14:24,080
Speaker 3: I struck up a great relationship with the landowner e.

1396
01:14:24,200 --> 01:14:26,280
Speaker 3: I text her once every two months and she gave

1397
01:14:26,280 --> 01:14:28,920
Speaker 3: me a horse tour once. Okay, this past week I

1398
01:14:28,960 --> 01:14:31,320
Speaker 3: texted her to ensure I had permission to ride this

1399
01:14:31,400 --> 01:14:35,080
Speaker 3: year again and asked about payment. This is quite a tale.

1400
01:14:35,800 --> 01:14:38,640
Speaker 3: The woman told me that she didn't expect payment or

1401
01:14:38,680 --> 01:14:43,000
Speaker 3: even physical labor or yardwork, and even gave me permission

1402
01:14:43,000 --> 01:14:46,919
Speaker 3: to use the pasture without payment. I struggled to realize

1403
01:14:46,920 --> 01:14:49,760
Speaker 3: my value and was already planning on giving some type

1404
01:14:49,760 --> 01:14:53,400
Speaker 3: of payment, but she refuses to accept it. I now

1405
01:14:53,439 --> 01:14:55,360
Speaker 3: need a gift for her to show how much I

1406
01:14:55,479 --> 01:15:03,040
Speaker 3: value her selflessness. Any recommendations. That's from Evy, Evy heavy Evie. Uh, okay,

1407
01:15:03,080 --> 01:15:05,040
Speaker 3: we don't know where ev is, but I will say

1408
01:15:05,080 --> 01:15:07,920
Speaker 3: that she's spelling like neighbor and labor with a U,

1409
01:15:08,160 --> 01:15:10,760
Speaker 3: So she's, as far as I can tell, not within

1410
01:15:10,800 --> 01:15:11,839
Speaker 3: the United States.

1411
01:15:12,479 --> 01:15:15,280
Speaker 4: Oh oh, well, then that changes things.

1412
01:15:15,320 --> 01:15:17,320
Speaker 3: I think that shifts everything.

1413
01:15:17,760 --> 01:15:19,559
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's now I'm thinking of it in a totally

1414
01:15:19,560 --> 01:15:22,360
Speaker 4: different way because I was thinking of these like, you know,

1415
01:15:23,240 --> 01:15:26,080
Speaker 4: these ranch people. But now I'm thinking of it in

1416
01:15:26,120 --> 01:15:26,720
Speaker 4: a different way.

1417
01:15:26,920 --> 01:15:31,640
Speaker 3: We're thinking down to Nabby, We're thinking I don't know,

1418
01:15:31,760 --> 01:15:36,559
Speaker 3: we're thinking truly anything outside of the wild West. This person, Evie,

1419
01:15:36,920 --> 01:15:40,400
Speaker 3: wants to give this horse property owner a gift. First

1420
01:15:40,400 --> 01:15:43,520
Speaker 3: thing that comes to mind yeah, give a horse a haircut,

1421
01:15:43,880 --> 01:15:47,360
Speaker 3: surprise haircut. The owner steps into the barn, all of

1422
01:15:47,360 --> 01:15:50,720
Speaker 3: their horses hair has been shorn. I think they're going

1423
01:15:50,760 --> 01:15:51,360
Speaker 3: to be thrilled.

1424
01:15:51,720 --> 01:15:54,920
Speaker 4: That's an amazing idea that that wouldn't have occurred to me.

1425
01:15:55,000 --> 01:15:58,120
Speaker 4: I was thinking of jams or something. But I really

1426
01:15:59,160 --> 01:16:01,719
Speaker 4: this is so much better. Okay, oh, I think that's

1427
01:16:01,880 --> 01:16:04,160
Speaker 4: really good. I mean, the only thing is though, is

1428
01:16:04,200 --> 01:16:06,439
Speaker 4: that about giving the horse haircut, is that the the

1429
01:16:06,640 --> 01:16:11,000
Speaker 4: owner has said they don't. It seems like they're insisting

1430
01:16:11,040 --> 01:16:14,240
Speaker 4: that it's free. It seems almost like you don't want

1431
01:16:14,280 --> 01:16:16,559
Speaker 4: to do some perform, some sort of labor. Like it

1432
01:16:16,600 --> 01:16:20,880
Speaker 4: seems like whoever owns this pasture, it's like it would

1433
01:16:20,880 --> 01:16:24,759
Speaker 4: almost maybe make them uncomfortable that that evy or ivy

1434
01:16:24,760 --> 01:16:25,679
Speaker 4: that you went out.

1435
01:16:25,520 --> 01:16:28,800
Speaker 3: And like now you're saying it would make the person

1436
01:16:28,840 --> 01:16:32,120
Speaker 3: uncomfortable if you broke into their barn in the night

1437
01:16:32,920 --> 01:16:35,960
Speaker 3: and cut off all of the horse's hair. That feels

1438
01:16:35,960 --> 01:16:37,520
Speaker 3: like it would lead to discomfort.

1439
01:16:38,320 --> 01:16:40,200
Speaker 4: Well, it's funny you even said to give a horse

1440
01:16:40,200 --> 01:16:42,920
Speaker 4: a haircut. I forgot. I mean, they don't get haircuts, right,

1441
01:16:43,760 --> 01:16:44,240
Speaker 4: I don't.

1442
01:16:44,040 --> 01:16:46,120
Speaker 3: Know that a horse ever gets a haircut, although you

1443
01:16:46,160 --> 01:16:48,919
Speaker 3: know that man must have to get cut at some point, right.

1444
01:16:49,080 --> 01:16:51,240
Speaker 4: Right, I'm going to go with gift certificate to a

1445
01:16:51,280 --> 01:16:56,599
Speaker 4: melting pot near you.

1446
01:16:57,200 --> 01:17:01,040
Speaker 3: Okay, how about you know, let's let's swing back into

1447
01:17:01,040 --> 01:17:03,559
Speaker 3: the realm of things that could be given. How about

1448
01:17:03,560 --> 01:17:07,040
Speaker 3: a picture of the horse? How about a picture on

1449
01:17:07,240 --> 01:17:10,880
Speaker 3: the horse? Oh my god, maybe it's like a beautiful

1450
01:17:11,240 --> 01:17:15,800
Speaker 3: painting of ev riding the horse through the prop that's amazing.

1451
01:17:15,920 --> 01:17:18,040
Speaker 4: And Evie, if you don't even feel up to that,

1452
01:17:19,160 --> 01:17:23,080
Speaker 4: maybe getting like because I do remember one time one

1453
01:17:23,120 --> 01:17:25,120
Speaker 4: of my gift that my husband gave to his mom

1454
01:17:25,200 --> 01:17:26,960
Speaker 4: was a chart something. He got an artist to do

1455
01:17:27,000 --> 01:17:31,120
Speaker 4: a charcoal drawing of her dogs. This this has never

1456
01:17:31,400 --> 01:17:36,479
Speaker 4: stopped making her really happy. Unfortunately he's standing right there.

1457
01:17:36,479 --> 01:17:38,600
Speaker 4: Else probably I would have said something I'm seeing I'm sorry,

1458
01:17:38,880 --> 01:17:42,320
Speaker 4: but no he yeah, that was no. But because you

1459
01:17:42,360 --> 01:17:44,040
Speaker 4: could draw it or you.

1460
01:17:43,960 --> 01:17:48,360
Speaker 3: Could pay, right, So what else do you easy? Anytime

1461
01:17:48,400 --> 01:17:52,240
Speaker 3: an animal is involved, you head over to atsy. Yeah,

1462
01:17:52,320 --> 01:17:55,080
Speaker 3: find an artist that wants a picture, wants to draw

1463
01:17:55,080 --> 01:17:58,040
Speaker 3: a picture, paint a picture, and you got it.

1464
01:17:58,640 --> 01:18:02,000
Speaker 4: Exactly and with that heartfelt note, and then maybe you

1465
01:18:02,120 --> 01:18:06,080
Speaker 4: frame it. But that is that's a really great idea, Bridger,

1466
01:18:06,240 --> 01:18:06,600
Speaker 4: you need a.

1467
01:18:06,600 --> 01:18:09,360
Speaker 3: Bag of oats. I'm thinking, how about you leave a

1468
01:18:09,360 --> 01:18:12,360
Speaker 3: big bag of oats on their doorstep.

1469
01:18:12,640 --> 01:18:16,720
Speaker 4: That seems hostile, incredibly hostile. I think that's a very

1470
01:18:16,840 --> 01:18:18,040
Speaker 4: bad idea.

1471
01:18:18,840 --> 01:18:23,200
Speaker 3: Big bag of oats. And no, you scrawl a message

1472
01:18:23,240 --> 01:18:24,560
Speaker 3: on a piece of paper.

1473
01:18:26,160 --> 01:18:30,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, or you break it? You again, I do like

1474
01:18:30,560 --> 01:18:32,080
Speaker 4: in the middle of the night, you go to the

1475
01:18:32,120 --> 01:18:35,240
Speaker 4: past your owner's home. You put her in a harness,

1476
01:18:35,640 --> 01:18:37,240
Speaker 4: stuff an apple in her mouth.

1477
01:18:37,439 --> 01:18:43,080
Speaker 3: You say you're my horse a horsey. Giddy up gal.

1478
01:18:43,560 --> 01:18:46,559
Speaker 3: That's a gift. That's an experience. That's people love it

1479
01:18:46,600 --> 01:18:49,080
Speaker 3: and experience as a gift. So there, you guess even

1480
01:18:49,439 --> 01:18:51,559
Speaker 3: any of those things will work just as well as

1481
01:18:51,600 --> 01:18:54,719
Speaker 3: the other. Take what you need. We've got to answer

1482
01:18:54,720 --> 01:18:58,160
Speaker 3: one more question. This is another. That one's too long,

1483
01:18:58,240 --> 01:18:59,800
Speaker 3: and we've already read a long one, so I'm gonna

1484
01:18:59,800 --> 01:19:02,360
Speaker 3: sit to the next one. This one says, hello, Bridger,

1485
01:19:02,400 --> 01:19:06,400
Speaker 3: an esteemed guest. My parents recently purchased a new home.

1486
01:19:07,320 --> 01:19:08,720
Speaker 3: Why did I say it like that? I don't know

1487
01:19:09,000 --> 01:19:11,719
Speaker 3: in Florida, and I need to get them a housewarming gift.

1488
01:19:11,760 --> 01:19:15,560
Speaker 3: My mom is in her seventies, loves mystery novels, gardening,

1489
01:19:15,840 --> 01:19:19,679
Speaker 3: and HGTV. My dad is in his eighties and likes

1490
01:19:19,720 --> 01:19:23,880
Speaker 3: history books, suits, and cable news. Let's hope not the

1491
01:19:23,920 --> 01:19:27,960
Speaker 3: cable news I'm thinking of. That's from Kathleen in Oregon,

1492
01:19:28,080 --> 01:19:28,839
Speaker 3: so her parents.

1493
01:19:29,880 --> 01:19:33,599
Speaker 4: It's in bad cable news. What can it possibly be bridge,

1494
01:19:33,920 --> 01:19:35,439
Speaker 4: I mean, like, dnt.

1495
01:19:38,760 --> 01:19:41,360
Speaker 3: You know, let's just say, you know, let's think more

1496
01:19:41,439 --> 01:19:47,439
Speaker 3: within the realm of mystery novels, HGTV and sweets Kathleen needs.

1497
01:19:47,680 --> 01:19:50,280
Speaker 3: These parents are now in Florida. They've retired.

1498
01:19:50,880 --> 01:19:55,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, Unfortunately, a real idea popped into my mind.

1499
01:19:55,320 --> 01:19:56,880
Speaker 4: It's not funny. I'm just gonna say we can get

1500
01:19:56,920 --> 01:19:59,440
Speaker 4: something funny. A subscription to Masterclass.

1501
01:20:00,200 --> 01:20:02,440
Speaker 3: That's a great thing for a couple of retirees.

1502
01:20:02,560 --> 01:20:04,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, they sound retired, And actually I got that from

1503
01:20:04,960 --> 01:20:07,960
Speaker 4: my mom when she retired, and she's so Kathleen, I

1504
01:20:08,000 --> 01:20:09,800
Speaker 4: would just caution you that if you were to go

1505
01:20:09,800 --> 01:20:11,320
Speaker 4: to the Master cross route. I did this for my

1506
01:20:11,360 --> 01:20:14,439
Speaker 4: mom and my mom our relationship is almost broken down

1507
01:20:14,479 --> 01:20:17,200
Speaker 4: because I haven't yet watched the Shonda Rhymes one and

1508
01:20:17,280 --> 01:20:20,360
Speaker 4: she is so upset that I haven't seen it. And

1509
01:20:20,400 --> 01:20:23,040
Speaker 4: it's pretty much all she'll talk about, and so you

1510
01:20:23,040 --> 01:20:24,760
Speaker 4: could open up cans of worms and it could be

1511
01:20:24,760 --> 01:20:27,360
Speaker 4: a problem. But that is that's an actual, real gift

1512
01:20:27,360 --> 01:20:28,640
Speaker 4: for retirees. It's not.

1513
01:20:29,200 --> 01:20:32,439
Speaker 3: Wait, so watch the Shonda Rhymes one, which I assume

1514
01:20:32,520 --> 01:20:33,200
Speaker 3: is like how to.

1515
01:20:33,080 --> 01:20:36,560
Speaker 4: Create a TV show? Yes, is your mom going to

1516
01:20:36,600 --> 01:20:38,800
Speaker 4: create a TV show? She's not going to create a

1517
01:20:38,840 --> 01:20:42,960
Speaker 4: TV show. She watches sometimes she watches things. She does

1518
01:20:43,040 --> 01:20:46,200
Speaker 4: watch all different ones unrelated.

1519
01:20:45,640 --> 01:20:46,800
Speaker 3: To her own right.

1520
01:20:47,360 --> 01:20:49,559
Speaker 4: She used to be a lawyer, so she watches all

1521
01:20:49,560 --> 01:20:52,439
Speaker 4: this different stuff. She's definitely interested because I'm in that world.

1522
01:20:52,920 --> 01:20:57,160
Speaker 4: She likes to know the logo and sometimes find things

1523
01:20:57,160 --> 01:20:59,040
Speaker 4: that she thinks that I will like.

1524
01:20:59,360 --> 01:21:03,240
Speaker 3: That's sweet. Also might be secretly trying to get staffed

1525
01:21:03,240 --> 01:21:04,559
Speaker 3: on Bridgerton or something.

1526
01:21:05,000 --> 01:21:07,000
Speaker 4: You know, I would be really fucking pissed if she,

1527
01:21:07,240 --> 01:21:11,720
Speaker 4: if she, under my nose, got some job like that.

1528
01:21:11,840 --> 01:21:13,920
Speaker 4: Note that would be really funny if she wrote for Britishon.

1529
01:21:14,120 --> 01:21:16,599
Speaker 4: That's another thing that we almost came to blows over

1530
01:21:16,600 --> 01:21:21,960
Speaker 4: because I haven't watched Bridgeston yet and I'm I mean sorry,

1531
01:21:22,120 --> 01:21:28,760
Speaker 4: I have eyes, Sorry, but okay, but it's funny. The

1532
01:21:28,800 --> 01:21:32,559
Speaker 4: Florida part, Yeah, how apart you know, yeah, what are

1533
01:21:32,560 --> 01:21:33,679
Speaker 4: you thinking? How swarming?

1534
01:21:34,040 --> 01:21:38,040
Speaker 3: How swarming? Now we're just on the sincere gift path,

1535
01:21:39,600 --> 01:21:41,680
Speaker 3: which I feel like, you know, you also wonder like

1536
01:21:41,720 --> 01:21:43,799
Speaker 3: what if they moved into is it a big empty house?

1537
01:21:43,840 --> 01:21:46,000
Speaker 3: In that case, maybe they would use like a nice

1538
01:21:46,040 --> 01:21:49,679
Speaker 3: bookshelf for the mom and her mystery novels. Yeah, something

1539
01:21:49,720 --> 01:21:51,280
Speaker 3: I like to get as a housewarming gift. As a

1540
01:21:51,320 --> 01:21:53,840
Speaker 3: plant because I know that, you know, I'm so good

1541
01:21:53,880 --> 01:21:56,200
Speaker 3: at killing them. It's nice to have somebody kind of

1542
01:21:56,320 --> 01:22:01,720
Speaker 3: restocking the vegetation in my home. Yes, they're in Florida.

1543
01:22:03,320 --> 01:22:06,439
Speaker 3: Let's see. Is it a dehumidifier a thing?

1544
01:22:06,840 --> 01:22:09,240
Speaker 4: Oh, that's we I've never had one in my life

1545
01:22:09,240 --> 01:22:11,000
Speaker 4: and they just had one in the Savanna apartment that

1546
01:22:11,040 --> 01:22:14,240
Speaker 4: I'm in. And yes, a dehumidfier. That's a great idea.

1547
01:22:14,760 --> 01:22:17,320
Speaker 4: These are incredibly practical gifts, right.

1548
01:22:19,160 --> 01:22:21,679
Speaker 3: I feel like with the cable news, let's get dad

1549
01:22:21,720 --> 01:22:26,280
Speaker 3: a new subscription to something he has to read, something

1550
01:22:26,320 --> 01:22:30,280
Speaker 3: I love a little bit more balanced, take something. Oh,

1551
01:22:31,880 --> 01:22:32,439
Speaker 3: let's hear it.

1552
01:22:33,400 --> 01:22:36,920
Speaker 4: Well, we didn't see we said the dad's into mystery stuff.

1553
01:22:36,920 --> 01:22:39,080
Speaker 4: He's not into history. Do they say history?

1554
01:22:39,200 --> 01:22:43,679
Speaker 3: Interesting? Interestingly, Mom's into mystery Dad's into history.

1555
01:22:44,160 --> 01:22:47,360
Speaker 4: Sweet, Okay, So I I mean, if you turn on

1556
01:22:47,920 --> 01:22:50,680
Speaker 4: there are these new hardcore histories with Dan Carlin that

1557
01:22:50,720 --> 01:22:53,400
Speaker 4: you have to pay for. Oh, and I'm listening to

1558
01:22:53,439 --> 01:22:55,800
Speaker 4: the one about the Fall of Rome and it is

1559
01:22:55,920 --> 01:22:59,599
Speaker 4: dad approved. So oh, your dad might not know, so

1560
01:22:59,640 --> 01:23:04,720
Speaker 4: that could be good. And then I mean the mystery. Yeah,

1561
01:23:04,840 --> 01:23:07,519
Speaker 4: I love the adjacent gift. I love the bookshelf idea.

1562
01:23:08,240 --> 01:23:10,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that that all adds up. Maybe get

1563
01:23:10,840 --> 01:23:13,120
Speaker 3: Mama like a magnifying glass.

1564
01:23:13,880 --> 01:23:14,080
Speaker 4: Oh.

1565
01:23:14,160 --> 01:23:19,280
Speaker 3: Yes, I feel like we've given you know, an abundance

1566
01:23:19,320 --> 01:23:20,160
Speaker 3: of ideas here.

1567
01:23:20,320 --> 01:23:22,560
Speaker 4: I think we've given out too much. I think we

1568
01:23:22,800 --> 01:23:24,280
Speaker 4: should have kept some of these doors sounds.

1569
01:23:24,280 --> 01:23:27,360
Speaker 3: We should take the heart mystery element, I mean tech

1570
01:23:27,520 --> 01:23:30,760
Speaker 3: now and start charging. But you know this is all free.

1571
01:23:30,840 --> 01:23:33,120
Speaker 3: That's the promise of an I said, no gifts. You're

1572
01:23:33,160 --> 01:23:38,280
Speaker 3: going to get world class advice, and you're gonna get

1573
01:23:38,280 --> 01:23:38,799
Speaker 3: it for free.

1574
01:23:39,200 --> 01:23:39,479
Speaker 4: Wow.

1575
01:23:39,640 --> 01:23:43,120
Speaker 3: Jen, we're done answering questions. We've come to the end

1576
01:23:43,120 --> 01:23:46,000
Speaker 3: of the podcast, and I'm not surprised. I had a

1577
01:23:46,040 --> 01:23:48,680
Speaker 3: wonderful time with you. I mean, if you did it

1578
01:23:48,720 --> 01:23:50,360
Speaker 3: when we were texting about this a few weeks here,

1579
01:23:50,400 --> 01:23:52,080
Speaker 3: you did promise you were going to develop a new

1580
01:23:52,080 --> 01:23:56,400
Speaker 3: personality to debut on the podcast, which would have been

1581
01:23:56,680 --> 01:23:58,599
Speaker 3: I would have loved to come in here and suddenly

1582
01:23:58,600 --> 01:23:59,839
Speaker 3: you're just a new person.

1583
01:24:00,080 --> 01:24:03,320
Speaker 4: That would have been so great. I should have done that.

1584
01:24:03,960 --> 01:24:08,480
Speaker 3: But I mean, what in this time, when it's impossible

1585
01:24:08,479 --> 01:24:12,400
Speaker 3: to see you otherwise? What I mean? This alone was

1586
01:24:12,600 --> 01:24:14,599
Speaker 3: just the most powerful gift of all.

1587
01:24:15,080 --> 01:24:16,760
Speaker 4: It was such a powerful gift. And it was also

1588
01:24:16,840 --> 01:24:21,559
Speaker 4: wonderful to know that we can have fun, good old

1589
01:24:21,560 --> 01:24:27,800
Speaker 4: fashioned fun, without tearing others down, without discussing money very vulgarly.

1590
01:24:28,680 --> 01:24:30,599
Speaker 4: I loved that we were able to do that.

1591
01:24:30,760 --> 01:24:33,200
Speaker 3: This was this may have been the biggest test of

1592
01:24:33,200 --> 01:24:36,200
Speaker 3: our friendship. Yeah, will they be able to talk about

1593
01:24:36,240 --> 01:24:39,120
Speaker 3: anything else other than people in entertainment they don't like.

1594
01:24:41,240 --> 01:24:45,599
Speaker 4: Exactly? I feel so great, Bridgard like a fresh flow. Yeah,

1595
01:24:45,840 --> 01:24:48,920
Speaker 4: I just don't feel dirty. I'm not. Yeah, I don't feel.

1596
01:24:49,040 --> 01:24:51,559
Speaker 3: Neither of us has to take a shower. We could

1597
01:24:51,600 --> 01:24:53,840
Speaker 3: just move on with our lives. The listener got to

1598
01:24:54,720 --> 01:24:57,280
Speaker 3: get a little peekin, and I think we've all had

1599
01:24:57,320 --> 01:24:59,640
Speaker 3: a good time here. And I mean, happy birthday to

1600
01:24:59,680 --> 01:25:05,800
Speaker 3: the pow, Happy birthday baby. This is in some ways

1601
01:25:05,800 --> 01:25:08,200
Speaker 3: the end of season one. I feel like it's too

1602
01:25:08,240 --> 01:25:10,240
Speaker 3: bad we don't have some some sort of cliffhanger to

1603
01:25:10,360 --> 01:25:14,080
Speaker 3: leave the audience with, will they won't they? Who done it?

1604
01:25:14,560 --> 01:25:17,519
Speaker 3: I do think? I mean, the hope here is that

1605
01:25:17,960 --> 01:25:23,080
Speaker 3: this episode is not the beginning of another disaster for humanity.

1606
01:25:23,400 --> 01:25:27,720
Speaker 3: Hopefully this is you know, second chapter end of pandemic

1607
01:25:27,920 --> 01:25:30,960
Speaker 3: rather than like you know, giant monster attacks the city

1608
01:25:31,280 --> 01:25:36,560
Speaker 3: or invaders or you know, giant volcano erupts and Yellowstone.

1609
01:25:36,600 --> 01:25:40,639
Speaker 3: There are all these things that could happen Ridger which

1610
01:25:40,640 --> 01:25:42,920
Speaker 3: I've now named on the podcast, which may will them

1611
01:25:42,920 --> 01:25:47,439
Speaker 3: into reality, which right, but that's the simulation, that's how

1612
01:25:47,439 --> 01:25:47,880
Speaker 3: it works.

1613
01:25:48,040 --> 01:25:50,439
Speaker 4: Those would be fine. Actually, I just ran the numbers.

1614
01:25:50,439 --> 01:25:51,360
Speaker 4: Those aren't that bad.

1615
01:25:53,439 --> 01:25:57,320
Speaker 3: Okay, Well, listener, thank you for being here, Jen, thank

1616
01:25:57,320 --> 01:26:00,000
Speaker 3: you for being here. I just had a terrific time.

1617
01:26:00,040 --> 01:26:02,360
Speaker 4: I'm delighted that you had me.

1618
01:26:04,560 --> 01:26:06,599
Speaker 3: I'm gonna go bake some cookies. I hope we can

1619
01:26:06,640 --> 01:26:09,559
Speaker 3: all have a wonderful day and we'll head off into

1620
01:26:09,600 --> 01:26:14,200
Speaker 3: the future and again end of the podcast. This is

1621
01:26:14,240 --> 01:26:19,680
Speaker 3: where we part ways. I said, No Gifts is an

1622
01:26:19,720 --> 01:26:23,720
Speaker 3: exactly right production. It's engineered by our dear friend Annalise

1623
01:26:23,800 --> 01:26:27,160
Speaker 3: Nelson and the theme song is by miracle worker Amy Mann.

1624
01:26:27,520 --> 01:26:31,080
Speaker 3: You must follow the show on Instagram at I said

1625
01:26:31,160 --> 01:26:33,680
Speaker 3: no gifts, that's where you're going to see pictures of

1626
01:26:33,720 --> 01:26:36,760
Speaker 3: all these wonderful gifts I'm getting. Listen and subscribe on

1627
01:26:36,840 --> 01:26:40,599
Speaker 3: Apple Podcasts, Stitcher or wherever you found me, and why

1628
01:26:40,640 --> 01:26:42,680
Speaker 3: not leave a review while you're there. It's really the

1629
01:26:42,760 --> 01:26:46,120
Speaker 3: least you could do. And if you're interested in advertising

1630
01:26:46,120 --> 01:26:49,759
Speaker 3: on the show, go to midroll dot com slash ads.

1631
01:26:51,160 --> 01:26:53,080
Speaker 1: Well, I invited you, hear.

1632
01:26:55,520 --> 01:27:01,280
Speaker 2: Funna Man myself perfectly clear, I guess to my home.

1633
01:27:03,600 --> 01:27:06,519
Speaker 1: You gotta come to me empty, and.

1634
01:27:07,960 --> 01:27:13,840
Speaker 2: I said, no guests, your own presences presents enough. I

1635
01:27:14,360 --> 01:27:18,080
Speaker 2: already had too much stuff, So how do

1636
01:27:18,280 --> 01:27:20,680
Speaker 1: You dare to surbey me