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Speaker 1: I don't care if my sister in law is pregnant.

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Speaker 1: I'm cutting her out of my life. Am I the

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Speaker 1: a hole?

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Speaker 2: How are you cutting her out of your life?

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Speaker 1: Are we talking Fisher Price scissors? Are we talking hack.

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Speaker 3: Saw, talking Samurai s or samurais, or we're talking Charles

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Speaker 3: Manson literally ripping the fetus out of the belly.

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Speaker 2: Oh, good god, that's an actual thing in Charles Manson.

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Speaker 4: Wow, thank you for that history Lesson.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Well, come and you know this, this story sam is

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Speaker 1: actually from our slash okop, our very own subreddit. Oh.

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Speaker 3: We love when you guys submit to our slash okop,

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Speaker 3: so please keep doing it and we'll keep reading them.

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Speaker 3: We select the top stories each week, so uh, slide

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Speaker 3: on in there.

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Speaker 2: Maybe we'll give you a chance.

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Speaker 4: Oh yeah, and this one comes from Ace Queen O.

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Speaker 2: Seven, Ace Queen, Thank you, Ace Queen, Yes Queen.

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Speaker 1: Yes, all right, we'll see what you got, Ace Queen.

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Speaker 1: I female twenty am engaged to a male twenty one.

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Speaker 3: Congrats, congratulations. Hey you know that always ends well.

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Speaker 1: Exactly, Come on now, not to one of our It's okay,

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Speaker 1: it's all gonna be, it is okay.

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Speaker 3: Oh I'm kidding your marriage is is gonna be great

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Speaker 3: to okay, I feel so shitty. Way, you have a

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Speaker 3: fifty percent chance of your marriage being amazing. Congratulations statistically statistically,

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Speaker 3: but because you're part of the Okay gang, it's one hundred.

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Speaker 4: It's one hundred and ten percent.

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Speaker 3: Okay, okay, especially if you let us solve all your relationships.

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Speaker 1: Exactly, just every issue you have submitted to the subreddit,

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Speaker 1: get them up voted, and then we'll read themorrow.

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Speaker 3: It could be a fun couples like wine down thing.

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Speaker 3: It's like, okay, hey, like like, uh, both John and

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Speaker 3: I have like relationship talks, like like we clean or

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Speaker 3: monthly or whatever, and so it's like you establish relationship

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Speaker 3: talk where you type out your gripes on okop show

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Speaker 3: and we read those gripes literally.

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Speaker 4: We will we will solve your marriage.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we will.

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Speaker 1: Are licensed marriage professionals exactly the license of me, say license.

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Speaker 2: I actually gave John his license and.

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Speaker 4: NSE I got that Sam certified.

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Speaker 1: Okay, well let's let's drop some Sam and John certified knowledge.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, some big ass some knowledge. Yep, steam and

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Speaker 3: thumbs right on this post. Delicious.

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Speaker 1: Now, my fiance and I have been engaged for two

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Speaker 1: years and we have a one year old son together.

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Speaker 4: Way, so we got a whole family U.

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Speaker 3: This is a lot of congrats and order engagements, son everything,

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Speaker 3: that's the biggest one.

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Speaker 1: That's and my fiance has an older sister, Janet, and

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Speaker 1: she has a husband Mark, obviously fake names for some context.

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Speaker 1: My fiance and his siblings have this really close bond.

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Speaker 1: This was formed by childhood trauma, so growing up all

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Speaker 1: they had was each other. Well, when Janet and Mark

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Speaker 1: first got their place, they took my fiance with them.

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Speaker 1: A couple months afterwards, they moved in and that's when

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Speaker 1: me and my fiance met each other. As normal love

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Speaker 1: stories go, we dated and we moved in with each other.

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Speaker 1: Very cute, ooh adorable. Janet and Mark never liked that

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Speaker 1: I was in the picture. They were very close with

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Speaker 1: my fiance and were upset that my fiance was spending.

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Speaker 4: More time with me.

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Speaker 3: Interesting the brother away from his siblings.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's it, don't You want to be happy for

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Speaker 1: your brother to have.

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Speaker 3: A power and we must travel upon continue.

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Speaker 1: All the problems started when our son was nine months old.

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Speaker 1: My fiance got a call that Janet was pregnant. Wow,

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Speaker 1: we were both very happy because we knew Janet was

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Speaker 1: trying and our son would have a cousin.

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Speaker 3: And also having cousins in the same age range is

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Speaker 3: incredibly op like it's it's sick. Highly recommend.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, for a second out your OP. I was like,

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Speaker 1: oh wait, like too many op's in the building over here. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: my cousins are all like literally, I have a cousin

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Speaker 1: in his early forties, I believe, and then, like everyone,

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Speaker 1: most of my first cousins had children around the between

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Speaker 1: like ten and fifteen, when I was ten and fifteen. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I think, I think, I think if I'm remembering correctly,

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Speaker 1: actually like between like that cousin his forties had his

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Speaker 1: first child when I was like close to ten, like

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Speaker 1: before I was ten something like that.

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Speaker 2: So so you were you were alone and a bit of.

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Speaker 1: An I'm closer to his daughter in age than I

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Speaker 1: am to him.

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Speaker 2: That's insane.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so are you heard uncle no cousin. I'm also

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Speaker 1: once removed. Yeah, yeah, I think that's what it is.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I was gonna say, like uncle ones removed, but that

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Speaker 3: doesn't make sense.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it gets complicated.

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Speaker 1: And my parents had some extra baby stuff that they

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Speaker 1: used to take care of my son, so I decided

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Speaker 1: to give it to them very nice. Yeah, I stepped

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Speaker 1: in to throw a baby shower for her and gave

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Speaker 1: her all my supports. OHP, you sound like a great person, honestly,

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Speaker 1: shout out to YOUP. But then, well, Janet and Mark

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Speaker 1: decided to move into a bigger home and take on

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Speaker 1: payments that they could barely.

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Speaker 4: Afford to move.

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Speaker 2: Janet, come on.

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Speaker 1: They were struggling to get by, so me and my

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Speaker 1: fiance offered to borrow their car. That way they could

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Speaker 1: save a little money. Oh, I guess like pay them

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Speaker 1: their car. Ye.

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Speaker 3: We offered to take their car on there and said,

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Speaker 3: I didn't make a profit for ourselves, genius.

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Speaker 1: We needed a second vehicle at the time. So it

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Speaker 1: just seemed like it worked. Honestly, once again, a great Like, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: the day we pay about six hundred dollars a month

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Speaker 1: for us to have that car, that is a pretty penny.

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Speaker 2: Is that expensive for a car? That's pretty expensive?

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Speaker 1: Right, yeah, Because I mean, like, if you get a

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Speaker 1: payment on a car, it's probably like two hundred to

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Speaker 1: four hundred bucks six hundred car and they're they're I

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Speaker 1: don't know what I mean, maybe they're overpaying just to

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Speaker 1: be nice or maybe it's like a big work truck

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Speaker 1: or I don't know something, but yeah, six six hundred

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Speaker 1: to me, I am. I am a basic bish uh

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Speaker 1: and my car payments were like one thirty or two

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Speaker 1: hundred or something, but yeah, six hundred is like a lot.

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Speaker 1: I mean, you were paying six hundred dollars a month

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Speaker 1: for rent in Santa Monica at one point.

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Speaker 2: Exactly.

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Speaker 4: There's some perspective for you.

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Speaker 1: And I took a management position at my job so

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Speaker 1: we could afford the car. Also, like again, OP is

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Speaker 1: like twenty, twenty years old, twenty, Yes.

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Speaker 3: Six hundred dollars on a car, and you're a month

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Speaker 3: on a car literally twenty.

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Speaker 1: And Op's like like has a child has? Like uh

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Speaker 1: is getting married?

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Speaker 2: Like?

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Speaker 4: Oh, these are sure mature twenty and.

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Speaker 1: Twenty one year olds over here, Okay, the okay gang

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Speaker 1: is way too mature for all you guys. Yeah, which

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Speaker 1: is hilarious because they listen to us, those immature assholes.

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Speaker 4: Exactly.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I threw a party for my fiance for his

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Speaker 1: twenty first birthday because they're twenty and twenty one. Again,

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Speaker 1: I asked them if I could throw it at their place,

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Speaker 1: but I paid for everything since they had a bigger house.

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Speaker 1: Before my fiance's friends arrived, they invited friends without consulting me,

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Speaker 1: and they didn't save any food for one of the

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Speaker 1: couples that had yet to show up.

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Speaker 4: So they literally were.

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Speaker 1: Like, hey, let's bring all our friends, eat all the food.

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Speaker 1: So Opea's guests don't have anything. I don't know if

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Speaker 1: they intentionally did that, but that's seems like what happened.

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Speaker 1: A couple of weeks ago, Janet reached out to me

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Speaker 1: telling me that I am no longer throwing her baby shower.

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Speaker 2: What why are you foot flopping?

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Speaker 1: She wanted it the weekend of my birthday, and she

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Speaker 1: wanted Mark's mom to throw it instead of me. She

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Speaker 1: told me it's because they have more money. Of course

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Speaker 1: I was okay with it, because they'll need everything they

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Speaker 1: can get. They are barely making it by as it is.

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Speaker 2: It's so poor.

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Speaker 1: It's okay, ear, poor sweetie, you need all the help

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Speaker 1: you can get.

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Speaker 4: Boom.

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Speaker 1: They're barely making it as it is. How are they

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Speaker 1: gonna afford a baby otherwise? So we set aside some

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Speaker 1: money so we can buy a couple of things off

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Speaker 1: of their registry. So I'm guessing it's like, hey, let

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Speaker 1: the rich people throw your baby showers so you can

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Speaker 1: get like all of the gifts and stuff. Don't care

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Speaker 1: for your baby, which is smart, I guess. The past

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Speaker 1: two weeks, Janet and Mark have been babysitting our kid.

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Speaker 1: Our main babysitter was out of town, and Janet was

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Speaker 1: thrilled to watch him. Mark did nothing but moan and

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Speaker 1: complain that he came over Mark Mark. Every time I

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Speaker 1: dropped him off or picked him up, he would ignore

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Speaker 1: me and continue playing his video games. He kept saying

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Speaker 1: things like, oh, I should be getting paid for doing

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Speaker 1: stuff like this when like you've been getting all this

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Speaker 1: help and support from them.

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Speaker 3: It's like, exactly, dude, calm down, why are you asking

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Speaker 3: for more?

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Speaker 1: Also, it's perfect because they can like babysit each other's kids.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, like with the others on it. Like it's a

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Speaker 3: perfect You don't have to actually like tit for tat too.

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Speaker 4: No, not at all, not at all. Well maybe they do. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: they're so, they're so entitled.

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Speaker 1: This past weekend, my fiance's little brother, Jason wanted to

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Speaker 1: come over and watch the baby for us and play

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Speaker 1: video games with my fiance Janet and Mark caught wind

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Speaker 1: of this and decided to call my fiance. Okay, They

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Speaker 1: asked him if Jason can go with him to the

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Speaker 1: anime convention. My fiance just asked them how much it

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Speaker 1: was to get in because I was interested in going.

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Speaker 1: Mark snapped back and immediately told him that I wasn't

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Speaker 1: welcome to join them and I was not welcome with them.

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Speaker 2: That seems like a step up in aggravation.

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Speaker 1: A little bit, dude, for real, this really upset me,

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Speaker 1: I can imagine.

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Speaker 4: I can imagine. So I snapped.

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Speaker 1: I arranged babysitting with other people for the rest of

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Speaker 1: the week, and told Janet that they are no longer

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Speaker 1: welcome in me and my son's life. That we will

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Speaker 1: return their car to them within the next couple of months,

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Speaker 1: so that way we can fix up the wear and

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Speaker 1: tear in the car and they're not completely screwed. My

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Speaker 1: fiance stands by me and my decision. He has hated

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Speaker 1: how they both have treated me. They are begging us

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Speaker 1: to use it for a couple of months after the

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Speaker 1: baby's born so that way they can get financially stable.

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Speaker 1: I feel so disrespected and I feel like they've been

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Speaker 1: using me and my fiance. I've already canceled my wedding

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Speaker 1: over this. I don't want to have a wedding where

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Speaker 1: my fiance's family can't attend.

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Speaker 4: Am I the A hole?

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Speaker 3: I feel like this devolved like those last couple of paragraphs.

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Speaker 3: It was like the like the other family snapped and

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Speaker 3: then they're like, I'm gonna give back the car. They're

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Speaker 3: like no, we're not gonna have enough money, and then

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Speaker 3: canceling the wedding.

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Speaker 4: That kind of blows my mind. I do. I want

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Speaker 4: to hear what all of you think? Is Obi the

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Speaker 4: a hole? The angel?

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Speaker 1: Are?

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Speaker 4: Is the other couple the a hold the angel? Let

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Speaker 4: us know? And why?

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Speaker 1: In the comments? Sam, can you can you give us

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Speaker 1: the verdicts? Is is Obi the A whole?

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Speaker 3: I mean, I don't think OP is the A hole?

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Speaker 3: But I feel like there was some like rash decision

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Speaker 3: is made me the way you're canceling the wedding, I

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Speaker 3: don't really I don't really get.

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Speaker 2: Giving back the car.

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Speaker 3: I guess I get, but it seems like, you know,

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Speaker 3: like it's like a more of like a you know,

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Speaker 3: tip for dat petty, Like, hey, like see how you

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Speaker 3: like us not supporting you anymore. Yeah, so like not

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Speaker 3: necessarily like super a holy, but a little bit like

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Speaker 3: you're like you're definitely not the angel for doing that,

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Speaker 3: being like a little bit vengeful. I just don't get

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Speaker 3: the canceling the wedding, like why would you do that? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: I mean I think her words verbatim were like, uh,

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Speaker 1: I don't want to have a wedding where my fiance's

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Speaker 1: family can't attend, so.

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Speaker 3: So basically like because they're they're they have beef with this, this, the,

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Speaker 3: the the.

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Speaker 1: And she doesn't want a wedding where it's like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I can't invite some family members because there's some drama.

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Speaker 1: But honestly, like I feel like that's pretty normal. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: honestly yeah, and again it's close family. But you know,

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Speaker 1: don't don't.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I guess like Op wants the the drama

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Speaker 3: to be resolved, I really before the wedding. So but like,

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Speaker 3: have you already put money into the wedding?

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Speaker 1: Like yeah, I like literally there was only one sentence

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Speaker 1: addressing honestly, Op, maybe you could share another story and

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Speaker 1: give us some more details, but yeah, I'm yeah, I.

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Speaker 2: Feel like the car makes sense.

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Speaker 3: You know, you don't want to support people that are

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Speaker 3: being like rude, actively rude to you. I just don't

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Speaker 3: I don't really understand the wedding part. So maybe you

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Speaker 3: can clarify that I don't. I personally, I don't think

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Speaker 3: you should cancel the wedding.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, is yeah, I don't. I don't think so either.

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Speaker 1: And maybe there's some details we're missing. But do you think, uh,

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Speaker 1: the other couple are the a holes?

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Speaker 3: Oh, the other couple is for sure the a hole. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: opis a little bit of the a hold for taking

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Speaker 3: the car back, just because it's like not the most

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Speaker 3: like it's not like the nicest thing to do. Totally

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Speaker 3: understand why you're doing it, but it's like it's not

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Speaker 3: like it's like a little bit of vindictive.

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Speaker 1: Honestly, I think they need a little bit of a

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Speaker 1: spanking because it's like if if like, like let's say

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Speaker 1: Opie continued doing it, like, would they continue to treat

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Speaker 1: her like complete garbage even though like op is like

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Speaker 1: going out of her way to help and support during

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Speaker 1: the baby shower. So it's like it's it's a little

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Speaker 1: bit of a mean yeah, And that's that's what it is.

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Speaker 1: I think is like repercussions to your.

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Speaker 3: I think it actually maybe is not the a hole.

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Speaker 3: It's just it's like, it's okay, your actions have consequences. Yeah, exactly,

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Speaker 3: And it might even be helpful to them for them

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Speaker 3: to realize, oh shit, we're being like not great people.

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Speaker 1: And op totally like they probably don't have any contract

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Speaker 1: or anything, right, so Opie could probably just like, here's

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Speaker 1: the keys. It's you know, beat up from us using it.

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Speaker 4: We're done.

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Speaker 1: We're not sting your name and it's under your name.

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Speaker 1: So now they have a beat up car. That and

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Speaker 1: they lose six hundred dollars a month in income. I

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Speaker 1: mean that's you know, that's serious. That's that's probably in

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Speaker 1: the state they're in, Like that could potentially make or

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Speaker 1: break them, having more income than expenses every month.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but they're in their stage for sure.

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Speaker 2: For sure.

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Speaker 3: My girl, my friend says she will terminate every pregnancy

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Speaker 3: that's a girl.

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Speaker 4: But what if I want a little baby? Girl? Updates?

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Speaker 3: I really needed that last thread because her opinion disoriented me.

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Speaker 3: I was shocked and it came out of left field.

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Speaker 3: It wasn't something that I ever expected her to say. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 3: I know, you do what expect someone to be like

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Speaker 3: I'm going to determinate every baby that's a girl. It

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Speaker 3: took me some time to really find a sensitive way

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Speaker 3: to talk about it, and I was struggling because I

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Speaker 3: wanted to have an honest conversation about it, and I

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Speaker 3: didn't want to put her on the defensive. She actually

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Speaker 3: brought it up herself. She said that she had been

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Speaker 3: half joking but was also half or mostly serious. You

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Speaker 3: can't just say you're half joking. I really like you.

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Speaker 3: It's a joke, but maybe it's not. If you like me,

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Speaker 3: clear words, Yeah, just tell me what you think. She

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Speaker 3: said that she'd been half joking, was half serious. She

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Speaker 3: told me that she had thought that she was over

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Speaker 3: her childhood, but the idea of having a daughter terrified her.

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Speaker 3: She said she didn't want to be her mother. She

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Speaker 3: didn't want to put her daughter through it. We're not

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Speaker 3: planning to have children right now, but she said she

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Speaker 3: was not sure about having children anymore, and she needed

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Speaker 3: a lot more time to sort herself out, and she

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Speaker 3: didn't know how long it would take. But she said

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Speaker 3: she was not going to have children until she could

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Speaker 3: raise them.

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Speaker 4: Well, that is.

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Speaker 1: A ten trillion times more reasonable take than I was.

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Speaker 3: She has started therapy again and she has talked about

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Speaker 3: some of the things her mom did to her. It

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Speaker 3: is hard to listen to my girlfriend talk about her past,

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Speaker 3: but I know she needs to say it out loud.

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Speaker 3: Makes me cry. Even thinking about what her mom put

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Speaker 3: her through. We are going through a rough time, but

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Speaker 3: I know it is important for her to work through

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Speaker 3: her trauma. I want to help her with that because

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Speaker 3: she is an amazing woman and partner, and I am

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Speaker 3: so grateful that we were together.

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Speaker 4: Quick story.

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Speaker 1: Before I was building a podcast business, my little entrepreneurial

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Speaker 1: booty was selling stuff online in middle school and high school.

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Speaker 4: It was me and my mommy.

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Speaker 1: We'd be in the garage selling all kinds of stuff

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Speaker 1: and I hated shipping.

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Speaker 2: The show is sponsored by Betterhelp.

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Speaker 3: Okay, John, So, we've read tons of stories that people

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I mean we've seen literally hundreds of these stories and

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Speaker 3: I think we give some great advice, but if you

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Speaker 1: That's a great, fantastic ending from a crazy.

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Speaker 3: Just crazy Edward. Wow, Like, I guess it all it

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00:19:00,440 --> 00:19:01,359
Speaker 3: all worked out in the end.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, like the fact that Op's girlfriend kind of came

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Speaker 1: around and now that both of them are like willing

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Speaker 1: to put in the work to like, Okay, we need

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Speaker 1: to figure out this situation. It clearly sounds like so

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00:19:11,600 --> 00:19:15,520
Speaker 1: much happened. It seems like to Ope's girlfriend through her childhood, there's.

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Speaker 3: And I mean I think it's like, like you talked

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Speaker 3: about putting in the work, and I think it's really

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Speaker 3: important to put in the work, put in the hours. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: and uh and take what's ours.

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Speaker 4: Such a sentimental moment. Ruined not ruined.