WEBVTT - An Indecent Proposal with Chelsea + Catherine 0:00:00.960 --> 0:00:06.480 Hello, Catherine, it's chilly Chelsea. Hi, yye hi Hi, what's happening? 0:00:07.280 --> 0:00:10.039 Oh man, just got back from a weekend in Phoenix 0:00:10.119 --> 0:00:13.720 with all of my in laws and my folks and 0:00:14.320 --> 0:00:15.080 it was really fun. 0:00:15.200 --> 0:00:15.960 Oh well good. 0:00:16.000 --> 0:00:18.680 It was also peaceful because I like gave myself time away. 0:00:18.760 --> 0:00:21.640 I like let Brad and his family have their time, 0:00:21.720 --> 0:00:24.880 and I gave you know, myself some decompression time and 0:00:24.920 --> 0:00:25.720 it was peaceful. 0:00:25.800 --> 0:00:28.600 Love. Well, good for you for going to Phoenix. I'm 0:00:28.880 --> 0:00:30.440 yeah for congratulations. 0:00:31.040 --> 0:00:33.040 It was actually the weather was incredible. 0:00:33.040 --> 0:00:36.200 It was like Sally Sonny beautiful, like not a hot 0:00:36.280 --> 0:00:36.800 day in sight. 0:00:36.920 --> 0:00:37.639 It was perfection. 0:00:38.040 --> 0:00:41.680 I have a show in Maracopa, Arizona, so oh yeah yeah, 0:00:41.720 --> 0:00:44.120 so I will be in Arizona at some point. 0:00:43.960 --> 0:00:47.200 Soon, hopefully before the hot weather comes. 0:00:47.240 --> 0:00:49.839 You could buy those tickets at Chelseahandler dot com. 0:00:50.040 --> 0:00:52.560 This isn't exactly an update, but this is just a 0:00:52.600 --> 0:00:54.800 sweet letter that we got from a listener that I 0:00:54.800 --> 0:00:57.280 thought was really great because we've been getting a lot 0:00:57.320 --> 0:01:00.400 of emails about book lists and book recommendations and all 0:01:00.400 --> 0:01:04.240 that good stuff. So Crystal says to your Chelsea, not 0:01:04.280 --> 0:01:06.680 needing advice today, but just wanted to write and say 0:01:06.680 --> 0:01:09.320 that you inspired me to start reading. I've never been 0:01:09.360 --> 0:01:11.880 a big reader, but because I knew it was important, 0:01:12.040 --> 0:01:14.480 I've always read to my children every day from the 0:01:14.560 --> 0:01:17.360 day they were born. My daughter is now nine and 0:01:17.400 --> 0:01:20.240 reads books on her own before bed each night. I 0:01:20.280 --> 0:01:22.800 always wanted them to love reading, because I always wished 0:01:22.840 --> 0:01:23.360 that I did. 0:01:23.760 --> 0:01:24.440 But you and. 0:01:24.360 --> 0:01:27.120 Catherine are always talking about different books and how wonderful 0:01:27.120 --> 0:01:29.520 they are, and how people aren't doing it as much anymore. 0:01:30.080 --> 0:01:32.080 All of that, coupled with the fact that I basically 0:01:32.080 --> 0:01:34.840 trained my daughter to love reading, inspired me to try again. 0:01:35.680 --> 0:01:37.839 One of my first books was one of Chelsea's, about 0:01:37.840 --> 0:01:39.360 a year ago, and from there I. 0:01:39.480 --> 0:01:40.400 Just haven't stopped. 0:01:40.800 --> 0:01:44.520 Ah I know, I'm really enjoying it and actually feeling 0:01:44.560 --> 0:01:47.120 that it has enriched my life in ways I wasn't expecting. 0:01:47.520 --> 0:01:49.800 I get so much joy out of such little effort. 0:01:49.960 --> 0:01:51.840 I must stay at home mom of ten years, and 0:01:51.880 --> 0:01:54.560 these four walls get so small after a while. It's 0:01:54.600 --> 0:01:56.920 a gift to be able to escape in a healthy way. 0:01:57.360 --> 0:01:59.440 So all this is to say thank you, thank you 0:01:59.480 --> 0:02:02.280 for sharing books you're reading, sharing your passionate about it, 0:02:02.640 --> 0:02:05.040 and reminding us just how important it is with. 0:02:05.120 --> 0:02:05.960 Love a crystal. 0:02:06.400 --> 0:02:07.279 Well, that's great. 0:02:07.400 --> 0:02:10.960 I love I love it. I love it. Reading is 0:02:11.000 --> 0:02:13.600 a gift. We're so lucky to be able to like 0:02:13.600 --> 0:02:16.040 get free entertainment. I mean, they're not free books, but 0:02:16.560 --> 0:02:20.200 it's cheap entertainment the library, they are, yeah, right, yeah, 0:02:20.240 --> 0:02:21.520 you can check them out at the library. 0:02:21.520 --> 0:02:23.000 I used to check out books at the library with 0:02:23.040 --> 0:02:23.280 my mom. 0:02:23.360 --> 0:02:25.480 We'd go to the library and Martha's Vineyard and I 0:02:25.480 --> 0:02:27.440 would get six books and she would get six books. 0:02:27.600 --> 0:02:29.280 And we would just always like I would read six 0:02:29.320 --> 0:02:30.760 books at a time and she would and they were 0:02:30.760 --> 0:02:32.799 all like choose your own adventures, you know, like stupid 0:02:32.840 --> 0:02:35.239 shit when I was young, but I just loved the 0:02:35.639 --> 0:02:37.840 putting down a book, going to the next one. And 0:02:37.880 --> 0:02:40.280 now the girls, Katie and Jesse, my two sixteen year 0:02:40.320 --> 0:02:43.880 old popsy twins, they are reading like crazy. Like Katie 0:02:43.919 --> 0:02:45.960 spent the weekend and she was up to like two 0:02:46.080 --> 0:02:48.320 in the morning reading her book, and I'm like yes. 0:02:48.520 --> 0:02:50.919 And when I met them, they didn't even read books. 0:02:50.919 --> 0:02:53.960 They were like, what we're not reading? And then yeah, 0:02:54.000 --> 0:02:54.919 so it's so cute. 0:02:54.960 --> 0:02:58.639 I love that. Yeah, it's so. It makes your vocabulary bigger, 0:02:58.720 --> 0:03:00.640 it makes you smarter. It helps you're spelling. 0:03:01.240 --> 0:03:03.960 Speaking of staying up late reading, I once was watching 0:03:03.960 --> 0:03:06.919 my nieces and my one niece was probably like eleven 0:03:07.040 --> 0:03:09.640 or twelve, and she had gotten into the Harry Potter 0:03:09.680 --> 0:03:12.160 books and it was just me with my two nieces. 0:03:12.520 --> 0:03:14.919 My knew this is a school day, and my niece 0:03:15.120 --> 0:03:16.200 now is that I love reading? 0:03:16.360 --> 0:03:16.840 She goes. 0:03:17.280 --> 0:03:20.080 I woke up at one in the morning and started 0:03:20.080 --> 0:03:21.880 reading my book and I never stopped. 0:03:22.120 --> 0:03:24.320 I've been awake since one of the morning reading And 0:03:24.400 --> 0:03:24.720 I was. 0:03:24.680 --> 0:03:26.840 Like, oh, oh, how cute? 0:03:26.960 --> 0:03:28.280 Is that so cute? 0:03:28.280 --> 0:03:29.880 But I was like, you're about to have the most 0:03:29.919 --> 0:03:32.520 miserable day ever because you're gonna fall asleep in class. 0:03:33.360 --> 0:03:35.240 So she was pretty crabby and we had a little 0:03:35.240 --> 0:03:38.480 early bedtime that night. But I was like, that's very sweet, 0:03:38.560 --> 0:03:41.000 but maybe maybe we don't do that again. 0:03:42.000 --> 0:03:42.880 That's cute. 0:03:43.360 --> 0:03:44.520 Was there a specific book. 0:03:44.560 --> 0:03:46.640 I know you said she's your own adventure books, but 0:03:46.720 --> 0:03:48.520 was there a specific book that you really. 0:03:48.280 --> 0:03:49.800 Like got you into reading as a kid. 0:03:51.280 --> 0:03:53.240 No, all the books. I read everything. 0:03:53.440 --> 0:03:55.320 I mean, I read serious books when I was little, 0:03:55.640 --> 0:03:57.360 my dad forced me. And then when I had my own, 0:03:57.520 --> 0:04:01.040 like you know, I could read what I wanted Beverly 0:04:01.080 --> 0:04:03.560 Cleary and like you know, Judy Bloom and all that, 0:04:03.720 --> 0:04:04.880 and then Sweet Valley High. 0:04:04.920 --> 0:04:06.840 Yeah, I love amazing. 0:04:06.960 --> 0:04:08.880 That was my favorite, and then a lot to choose 0:04:08.920 --> 0:04:09.600 your own adventures. 0:04:09.600 --> 0:04:11.240 I would just go through them like any kid and 0:04:11.320 --> 0:04:13.720 go to the War the first, go to page twenty eight. 0:04:13.720 --> 0:04:15.400 Then I would go back and go to page thirty five, 0:04:15.440 --> 0:04:17.000 and you know, I just love that. 0:04:17.160 --> 0:04:18.760 There is nothing more fun than those. 0:04:18.920 --> 0:04:22.040 I know, I know, I guess they have them for adults, 0:04:22.080 --> 0:04:24.039 but they I think they do. 0:04:24.120 --> 0:04:26.520 But I don't think that that I'm that interested in 0:04:26.560 --> 0:04:27.919 that anymore. 0:04:29.120 --> 0:04:31.080 Should we jump into some questions, Chelsea. 0:04:30.960 --> 0:04:33.240 Absolutely, let's do it. We have a one on one 0:04:33.240 --> 0:04:34.080 episode today. 0:04:34.240 --> 0:04:34.800 We sure do. 0:04:35.640 --> 0:04:39.359 Okay, So this one is a little bit of a 0:04:39.400 --> 0:04:44.479 complicated one, Sarah says, Dear Chelsea, My family and I 0:04:44.520 --> 0:04:47.640 moved to a new neighborhood about six months ago. It's quiet, 0:04:47.720 --> 0:04:50.880 clean and has lots of families with young children, including 0:04:50.920 --> 0:04:54.000 my own. Shortly after moving in, we discovered that our 0:04:54.040 --> 0:04:56.479 next door neighbor has an adult daughter who does not 0:04:56.520 --> 0:04:58.320 live at the house, but is likely living out of 0:04:58.320 --> 0:05:00.320 her beat up car, which she likes to part in 0:05:00.320 --> 0:05:02.960 front of her mom's house. She shows up for a 0:05:03.000 --> 0:05:05.080 few days at a time, leaves for a few days, 0:05:05.080 --> 0:05:07.720 and then comes back. She often gets loaded and then 0:05:07.800 --> 0:05:10.280 passes out in her car for hours in broad daylight. 0:05:10.800 --> 0:05:13.640 Sometimes she's just in her car by herself or with others, 0:05:13.760 --> 0:05:16.040 doing tweaker things like looking for things on the ground. 0:05:16.839 --> 0:05:19.520 Whenever her daughter is brought up in conversation, the neighbor 0:05:19.680 --> 0:05:22.200 dismisses it and says she just comes around from time 0:05:22.240 --> 0:05:24.200 to time to use my swimming pool, and the neighbor 0:05:24.240 --> 0:05:26.680 doesn't really seem interested in talking about what's going on. 0:05:27.839 --> 0:05:30.039 My neighbor's boyfriend shared a little more once and said 0:05:30.040 --> 0:05:32.040 the daughter is cut off and not allowed to enter 0:05:32.080 --> 0:05:34.760 their home. However, it's apparent that they aren't doing anything 0:05:34.800 --> 0:05:36.840 about their doing drugs and passing out in the car 0:05:36.880 --> 0:05:37.640 in front of their house. 0:05:38.279 --> 0:05:40.279 I feel for my neighbor mother to mother. 0:05:40.320 --> 0:05:42.240 It makes me wonder if she feels more comfortable knowing 0:05:42.279 --> 0:05:44.440 where her daughter is and having her parked out front 0:05:44.480 --> 0:05:45.920 rather than quote on the streets. 0:05:46.640 --> 0:05:48.480 Here's my dilemma. I couldn't care. 0:05:48.360 --> 0:05:50.080 Less what her daughter does with her life or her 0:05:50.080 --> 0:05:52.240 relationship with her mother, But I don't want my children 0:05:52.279 --> 0:05:54.360 seeing her doing drugs or being passed out in her 0:05:54.360 --> 0:05:56.479 car for hours while they play in the front yard. 0:05:57.120 --> 0:05:58.640 It's also quite a nice or to have a. 0:05:58.560 --> 0:06:01.279 Tweaker hanging out in her beat up with broken windows 0:06:01.320 --> 0:06:04.239 every time I look out while doing my dishes. Should 0:06:04.279 --> 0:06:06.880 I try and have another conversation with her mom? How 0:06:06.880 --> 0:06:09.400 do I approach this with her? Deep down, I really 0:06:09.480 --> 0:06:11.400 want to just call the cops or knock on her 0:06:11.400 --> 0:06:14.240 car window and tell her to leave, but she's technically 0:06:14.320 --> 0:06:16.640 not on my property and I don't want to negatively 0:06:16.680 --> 0:06:19.640 impact my relationship with my neighbor. Your advice on how 0:06:19.680 --> 0:06:24.080 to handle this would be greatly appreciated, Sarah. 0:06:23.040 --> 0:06:25.600 Well, I mean, honestly, it's none of your fucking business, 0:06:26.120 --> 0:06:29.360 Like it's not she's not on your property. I mean 0:06:29.640 --> 0:06:33.039 as a parent, obviously her mother isn't psyched about that either, 0:06:33.880 --> 0:06:36.320 and I think you can relate that you would rather 0:06:36.360 --> 0:06:38.839 have your daughter in front of your house doing drugs 0:06:38.839 --> 0:06:41.960 than god knows where, and it's not your property, so 0:06:42.000 --> 0:06:45.159 you have nothing to say about the matter. And sorry 0:06:45.240 --> 0:06:48.480 that it's an eyesore, but there's nothing for you to do. 0:06:48.920 --> 0:06:50.200 That's not your business. 0:06:51.040 --> 0:06:54.800 And I honestly think like your kids are small. So 0:06:55.440 --> 0:06:57.239 you know, if you tell them like, oh, she's taking 0:06:57.279 --> 0:06:59.480 a nap, Like, I think that's probably all the explanation 0:06:59.560 --> 0:07:01.680 that they need at this time. And like when they're 0:07:01.680 --> 0:07:04.120 twenty five, they'll, you know, remember this lady and figure 0:07:04.160 --> 0:07:04.960 out what was going on. 0:07:05.040 --> 0:07:07.320 Or they won't remember anything about it, you know, right, 0:07:07.720 --> 0:07:10.480 or they won't and it's not Yeah, and your kids 0:07:10.480 --> 0:07:12.760 aren't gonna like that's like saying, oh, I don't want 0:07:12.760 --> 0:07:15.560 my children exposed to transgender kids because they're going to 0:07:15.640 --> 0:07:18.480 become trans just because there's some woman tweaking out in 0:07:18.520 --> 0:07:20.480 a car. At least she's not on your property, she's 0:07:20.520 --> 0:07:23.920 not talking to your children. Yeah, you're really reaching to 0:07:24.000 --> 0:07:25.200 think that you have a say in it. 0:07:25.840 --> 0:07:27.560 Yeah, And I know people get really bent out of 0:07:27.560 --> 0:07:30.000 shape about like, oh, someone's parked in from my house. Whatever, 0:07:30.040 --> 0:07:31.960 I can see it from my house. But I think 0:07:32.000 --> 0:07:33.840 this is a family across the street that has a 0:07:33.880 --> 0:07:37.160 really complicated thing going on, and I think this is 0:07:37.200 --> 0:07:39.080 a moment where you need to dig deep and reach 0:07:39.120 --> 0:07:42.880 out with kindness. Yes, you know, maybe it's even like 0:07:43.640 --> 0:07:46.280 make a sandwich and like if she's asleep, leave it 0:07:46.320 --> 0:07:48.720 on her car, or like knock on the window. If 0:07:48.720 --> 0:07:50.760 she's awake and like hand her a sandwich or bring 0:07:50.800 --> 0:07:52.800 her lunch, like when you see her out there, because 0:07:53.040 --> 0:07:55.520 she's obviously going through a really tough time. You know, 0:07:55.640 --> 0:07:58.480 calling the cops is not a solution for drug addiction. 0:07:58.840 --> 0:07:59.440 No, it's not. 0:08:00.040 --> 0:08:02.240 That is actually nice. It's like take your contempt and 0:08:02.520 --> 0:08:04.280 turn it upside down into kindness. 0:08:04.680 --> 0:08:06.680 Yeah, I think try and find ways where you can 0:08:06.720 --> 0:08:10.240 meet this with kindness and giving and understand that like 0:08:10.320 --> 0:08:12.640 this is more complicated. They're just like having a shitty 0:08:12.720 --> 0:08:16.080 view at your window. So and also, like things do 0:08:16.160 --> 0:08:18.360 come to an end, so this will this will go 0:08:18.400 --> 0:08:19.320 one way or another. 0:08:19.560 --> 0:08:22.800 And obviously we hope that she gets help, but you know, 0:08:22.840 --> 0:08:24.600 the family is doing the best they can, it sounds 0:08:24.600 --> 0:08:25.239 like right now. 0:08:25.400 --> 0:08:29.240 And also, calling the police is definitely going to fracture 0:08:29.240 --> 0:08:30.520 your relationship with your neighbor. 0:08:30.640 --> 0:08:34.160 So you can say goodbye to that if you do that, and. 0:08:34.120 --> 0:08:35.880 It will also probably not be a solution. 0:08:36.360 --> 0:08:38.760 I grew up, well, this isn't this isn't exactly the same, 0:08:38.800 --> 0:08:41.000 but it's slightly analogous. Where I grew up with my 0:08:41.120 --> 0:08:44.079 dad had all these used cars in our driveway all 0:08:44.120 --> 0:08:46.199 the time, and it looked like you know, the parking lot. 0:08:46.360 --> 0:08:48.240 It looked like Sandford and Son in our neighborhood. And 0:08:48.280 --> 0:08:50.720 we were like in a nice middle class, upper middle 0:08:50.720 --> 0:08:54.760 class neighborhood in New Jersey, and our neighbors always called 0:08:54.760 --> 0:08:55.280 the police on. 0:08:55.280 --> 0:08:56.400 My dad because of the cars. 0:08:56.840 --> 0:09:01.120 And it just made me, even to this day, not 0:09:01.320 --> 0:09:04.959 like my neighbors, you know, because we became like the 0:09:05.160 --> 0:09:08.520 eyesore of the neighborhood. And I didn't like my house either. 0:09:08.600 --> 0:09:10.880 I wasn't happy about it either, but seeing my father, 0:09:11.120 --> 0:09:14.040 like seeing us kind of like my father attacked and 0:09:14.120 --> 0:09:17.160 people call, it's just embarrassing, and it's like, it's that's 0:09:17.200 --> 0:09:19.840 not we're putting out love. That's just putting out disdain, 0:09:20.360 --> 0:09:22.800 especially because you don't like something in your view and 0:09:23.000 --> 0:09:23.800 like your eyeline. 0:09:23.840 --> 0:09:25.600 It's just it's silly. 0:09:26.360 --> 0:09:29.160 Yeah. Yeah, So I think let's try and meet this with. 0:09:29.120 --> 0:09:31.560 A little love and a little understanding and give us 0:09:31.559 --> 0:09:33.240 an update if there is a change or if you 0:09:33.280 --> 0:09:35.880 do decide to try that, and let us know kind 0:09:35.880 --> 0:09:36.440 of how that goes. 0:09:36.880 --> 0:09:38.559 Okay, we're gonna take a quick break and we'll be 0:09:38.640 --> 0:09:39.000 right back. 0:09:43.120 --> 0:09:46.480 And we're back, so let's talk to our first caller. 0:09:46.559 --> 0:09:47.839 We've got some cuties today. 0:09:48.080 --> 0:09:49.199 Okay, let's go. 0:09:49.640 --> 0:09:51.880 Vicky is calling in and she's got a bit of 0:09:51.880 --> 0:09:56.760 a doozy here. So Vicky says, dear Chelsea, it's one am. 0:09:56.920 --> 0:09:58.840 I have to get up for work in five hours. 0:09:58.920 --> 0:10:01.720 I can't sleep so angry, and I need your advice. 0:10:02.440 --> 0:10:04.520 A couple days ago, one of the owners of my 0:10:04.600 --> 0:10:07.840 company offered to pay me two thousand dollars to have 0:10:07.920 --> 0:10:11.880 sex with him. I worked for a roofing company doing admin. 0:10:12.080 --> 0:10:14.440 I've been there for seven months. I was determined to 0:10:14.440 --> 0:10:17.079 show this new group of blue collar guys just how organized, 0:10:17.200 --> 0:10:19.480 detail oriented and smart a girl like me could be. 0:10:20.040 --> 0:10:20.640 And I did. 0:10:20.920 --> 0:10:23.120 I got two raises in the first six months and 0:10:23.160 --> 0:10:27.160 a Christmas bonus. I attended the company Christmas party alone. 0:10:27.240 --> 0:10:29.520 I rented a dress and felt like a million bucks. 0:10:29.640 --> 0:10:30.199 It was fun. 0:10:30.559 --> 0:10:32.440 That night, I noticed one of the owners sent me 0:10:32.480 --> 0:10:35.800 a message on LinkedIn at one forty that seemed like 0:10:35.840 --> 0:10:39.520 a typo. Then he started testing the waters. Maybe I 0:10:39.640 --> 0:10:41.960 was flattered that my boss was paying attention to me. 0:10:42.120 --> 0:10:42.679 Who knows. 0:10:43.280 --> 0:10:45.520 Anyway, he said he wanted to ask me something and 0:10:45.559 --> 0:10:47.560 wanted to switch to text, so I gave. 0:10:47.480 --> 0:10:48.520 Him my cell number. 0:10:49.320 --> 0:10:51.640 He started by saying how good I looked at the party, 0:10:51.679 --> 0:10:54.400 but pretty quickly explained that he was interested in paying 0:10:54.440 --> 0:10:57.079 me two thousand dollars a pop to bang me. I 0:10:57.120 --> 0:11:00.160 told him thanks, eye roll. My first reaction was to 0:11:00.200 --> 0:11:03.959 be grateful, ugh, but no thanks. He then offered to 0:11:04.000 --> 0:11:06.920 pay me for my silence. I assured him I would 0:11:06.920 --> 0:11:09.760 never tell and didn't want any money. He asked me 0:11:09.800 --> 0:11:12.640 to delete the text, but I kept them. I was 0:11:12.640 --> 0:11:15.240 scared there would be retaliation because I turned him down. 0:11:15.679 --> 0:11:18.320 Nothing has happened since then. Now that I've had time 0:11:18.320 --> 0:11:20.840 to process the severity of what happened, I'm just mad. 0:11:21.280 --> 0:11:22.880 I want to make a scene in front of everyone 0:11:22.880 --> 0:11:24.960 at the company and call this bastard out and leave. 0:11:25.160 --> 0:11:27.200 What should I do? My heart is broken. I thought 0:11:27.200 --> 0:11:29.760 I'd found a new family and a new job. Sincerely, 0:11:30.040 --> 0:11:33.080 Vicky and Vicky, I know some stuff has sort of 0:11:33.160 --> 0:11:35.360 like come out a little bit since you wrote in 0:11:35.440 --> 0:11:37.160 as well, right with like other. 0:11:37.120 --> 0:11:40.040 Cares, I've got some updates, Hi, Vicky. 0:11:41.000 --> 0:11:44.800 Hi, So I did go forward with my information to 0:11:45.720 --> 0:11:50.040 the COO, and they the disciplinary action that happened was 0:11:50.080 --> 0:11:53.040 that this man was told that he can only work remotely. Now, 0:11:53.679 --> 0:11:56.679 you know, everything was documented they said they were shocked, 0:11:56.679 --> 0:12:00.640 they couldn't believe it, which I don't believe that they're 0:12:00.640 --> 0:12:04.000 shocked at all. Anyway, they I thought, you know, maybe 0:12:04.000 --> 0:12:06.200 this had happened to somebody else, But they made me 0:12:06.240 --> 0:12:08.480 sign this paper that said that I wouldn't talk about 0:12:08.480 --> 0:12:11.559 it to preserve the culture, which is obviously amazing at 0:12:11.559 --> 0:12:14.360 the company I work for. So I'm not supposed to 0:12:14.360 --> 0:12:16.880 talk about it with other people or the disciplinary action 0:12:17.080 --> 0:12:19.559 or why this guy doesn't come into the office anymore. 0:12:20.120 --> 0:12:21.920 So I did talk to somebody and I asked them, 0:12:21.960 --> 0:12:24.959 I thought maybe she had a similar experience, and she had. 0:12:25.600 --> 0:12:28.800 She's twenty four, she was young, and he actually grabbed 0:12:28.840 --> 0:12:31.280 her butt and told her he would pay her twice 0:12:31.320 --> 0:12:33.439 as much as she was making to be his becking 0:12:33.520 --> 0:12:36.520 call girl, you know, and like meet him wherever for sex. 0:12:37.880 --> 0:12:38.560 And she said no. 0:12:38.720 --> 0:12:39.559 She still worked for the. 0:12:39.520 --> 0:12:41.800 Company, and she was crying when she told me. And 0:12:41.880 --> 0:12:45.400 I was just like furious, because you know, I think 0:12:45.400 --> 0:12:47.760 it's probably a lot of women that have dealt with 0:12:47.800 --> 0:12:51.000 this and stayed silent because she was scared she wouldn't, 0:12:51.120 --> 0:12:53.679 you know, they wouldn't believe her, and you know, who 0:12:53.760 --> 0:12:57.120 is she to make these accusations, so she never came forward. 0:12:57.800 --> 0:12:59.439 And would she be willing to come forward? 0:12:59.520 --> 0:13:02.320 Now I didn't ask her, but she did thank me 0:13:02.440 --> 0:13:05.960 for coming forward. And that's kind of where we left at. 0:13:06.240 --> 0:13:08.640 But I think she would Listen, you signed something. 0:13:09.600 --> 0:13:12.000 I don't really know how binding all of that shit is, 0:13:12.040 --> 0:13:14.360 because also there's new information. Now you're not just talking 0:13:14.440 --> 0:13:16.800 about yourself, you're talking about that it's happened to other women. 0:13:17.240 --> 0:13:19.400 And he's an owner of this company. What kind of 0:13:19.440 --> 0:13:20.959 company is it. 0:13:20.960 --> 0:13:25.040 It's a construction company, so there's two original owners, but 0:13:25.040 --> 0:13:27.480 they've been bought out by a private equity group, so 0:13:28.320 --> 0:13:29.880 they have some ownership still. 0:13:30.440 --> 0:13:32.520 And it's like a mid size company, so like not 0:13:32.600 --> 0:13:35.000 something tiny, not something some giant corporation. 0:13:35.200 --> 0:13:38.880 So yeah, and so your human resources department that's part 0:13:38.880 --> 0:13:40.679 of the private equity human resources. 0:13:40.760 --> 0:13:43.600 Right, we don't have a human resource department that I'm 0:13:43.640 --> 0:13:44.080 aware of. 0:13:44.520 --> 0:13:46.320 Okay, Well that's the first problem. 0:13:46.679 --> 0:13:49.360 Yeah, I would, I would go back and go I'm sorry, 0:13:49.360 --> 0:13:51.480 but I've learned that there are more than one person 0:13:51.520 --> 0:13:55.280 without mentioning anyone's names without their permission, but that there's 0:13:55.320 --> 0:13:58.400 more than one person that this happened to. And now 0:13:58.440 --> 0:14:00.680 this is a different set of circumstances. So I want 0:14:00.679 --> 0:14:02.600 to know what you're going to do because being working 0:14:02.720 --> 0:14:06.200 him working remotely is inacceptable. Like this is now a 0:14:06.240 --> 0:14:10.120 pattern of behavior, and these women are we're talking about 0:14:10.120 --> 0:14:12.160 all coming forward. So what are you going to do 0:14:12.200 --> 0:14:14.960 to prevent this from happening? Because he needs to be removed. 0:14:15.320 --> 0:14:18.360 This is not something that you work around. And I 0:14:18.440 --> 0:14:21.360 just don't think you could ever sit around. And I mean, 0:14:21.400 --> 0:14:23.640 he's just going to do it again to someone else. 0:14:23.760 --> 0:14:25.320 Right, and it definitely has been. 0:14:25.960 --> 0:14:28.480 If you are worried at all, you could say, like 0:14:28.520 --> 0:14:30.960 she came to me, That's how I found out about this. 0:14:31.120 --> 0:14:32.200 I'm not going to reveal who. 0:14:32.080 --> 0:14:35.760 It is, but like this seems to me like something 0:14:35.960 --> 0:14:38.600 they know is happening and is a pattern of behavior, 0:14:38.640 --> 0:14:42.120 like they already I would imagine knew about this before you, 0:14:42.200 --> 0:14:45.680 because this doesn't sound like his first if he immediately 0:14:45.720 --> 0:14:47.400 was like, oh, can I pay you to be silent? 0:14:47.760 --> 0:14:49.240 Like he he. 0:14:49.280 --> 0:14:52.120 Knows how this goes, he knows what is going to 0:14:52.160 --> 0:14:56.120 happen next, And I know you need the job and everything, 0:14:56.320 --> 0:14:59.240 but the fact that they didn't even offer you anything 0:14:59.320 --> 0:15:01.400 for your silence, They just were like, hey, sign this 0:15:01.560 --> 0:15:03.560 that honestly makes me kind of pissed. 0:15:04.080 --> 0:15:09.440 Yeah, I don't think it's that legally binding, Like no, yeah. 0:15:08.920 --> 0:15:12.120 And it's just about not talking to coworkers, right, it's 0:15:12.160 --> 0:15:12.840 not you know. 0:15:13.360 --> 0:15:15.800 They also had told me in a verbal conversation that 0:15:15.840 --> 0:15:17.840 I was getting a fat raise this year, and then 0:15:18.080 --> 0:15:20.800 after that was before this happened, and then after it happened, 0:15:21.160 --> 0:15:24.000 my fat raise was three thousand dollars, so it came 0:15:24.040 --> 0:15:27.280 out to ten dollars a week on a paycheck after 0:15:27.560 --> 0:15:28.400 my taxes. 0:15:28.440 --> 0:15:29.160 So not that bad. 0:15:29.680 --> 0:15:31.360 I mean, that's not what I don't think they would 0:15:31.400 --> 0:15:32.160 consider it fat. 0:15:32.800 --> 0:15:32.880 No. 0:15:33.880 --> 0:15:36.720 I will also say I talked to an attorney and 0:15:37.000 --> 0:15:39.280 they said she needs to talk to a lawyer. So 0:15:39.640 --> 0:15:43.160 keep documents of everything, keep records of everything. But you 0:15:43.160 --> 0:15:45.200 should probably go see it an attorney as well. 0:15:45.720 --> 0:15:48.240 Yeah, I'm definitely going to. I think it's just I 0:15:48.240 --> 0:15:51.680 think it's my responsibility as a woman raised by Chelsea, 0:15:52.120 --> 0:15:55.120 to you know, to speak up for other women. And 0:15:55.160 --> 0:15:57.280 I think, you know, we've all had it, Like it's enough. 0:15:57.960 --> 0:16:01.720 I mean they've been getting away with this behavior and enough. 0:16:01.960 --> 0:16:03.560 I'm not gonna just I'm not going to live in 0:16:03.560 --> 0:16:05.320 a world where I don't have a voice, you know, 0:16:05.560 --> 0:16:07.800 and I have a lot to offer and I want 0:16:07.840 --> 0:16:10.480 to be rewarded for that in the workplace, and I 0:16:10.600 --> 0:16:12.600 want to have a safe work environment for myself and 0:16:12.640 --> 0:16:13.240 for everybody. 0:16:13.680 --> 0:16:14.800 Good for you, Good for you. 0:16:14.880 --> 0:16:17.000 I love everything you're saying, and you're right, you know, 0:16:17.080 --> 0:16:19.400 some people are not as strong as you, and sometimes, 0:16:19.440 --> 0:16:23.080 like I feel very responsible for being a strong, strong 0:16:23.120 --> 0:16:25.160 woman for all the other women that aren't going to 0:16:25.200 --> 0:16:26.840 be strong, like I'm standing up for them. 0:16:26.920 --> 0:16:28.560 So and I think you're the same. 0:16:28.640 --> 0:16:30.560 So I think that you just take that with you 0:16:31.000 --> 0:16:33.440 in every step you take in this arena, because they 0:16:33.480 --> 0:16:35.040 need to get rid of him. He doesn't get to 0:16:35.040 --> 0:16:36.800 be an owner and offer people two thousand first of all, 0:16:36.800 --> 0:16:41.520 two thousand dollars for sex is insulting, Like, I know, excuse. 0:16:41.120 --> 0:16:45.200 Me, I know, Demi Moore got a million and Robert Redford, 0:16:45.240 --> 0:16:45.480 you know. 0:16:45.800 --> 0:16:46.840 Right, right right? 0:16:46.880 --> 0:16:48.400