1
00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:02,240
Speaker 1: Buckle up, hold on tight, we gotta fall you here.

2
00:00:02,279 --> 00:00:06,400
Speaker 1: It is the Strawberry Letter subject. Is she delusional? Or

3
00:00:06,480 --> 00:00:11,680
Speaker 1: am I a hater? Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm writing you

4
00:00:11,840 --> 00:00:15,160
Speaker 1: for advice on how to deal with a female family member.

5
00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:19,319
Speaker 1: I believe that all women should be confident, regardless of

6
00:00:19,360 --> 00:00:23,400
Speaker 1: their looks or size. But my cousin is an exception

7
00:00:23,480 --> 00:00:26,640
Speaker 1: to this rule. She has crossed the line of confidence

8
00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:30,760
Speaker 1: and now she's downright delusional. She's over forty years old,

9
00:00:31,160 --> 00:00:34,560
Speaker 1: yet she lives on social media all day, every day,

10
00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:39,240
Speaker 1: constantly posting about how fine she is and how successful

11
00:00:39,320 --> 00:00:43,360
Speaker 1: she is. Neither of these is true. Every man wants

12
00:00:43,360 --> 00:00:46,440
Speaker 1: her and every woman is jealous of her. It is

13
00:00:46,479 --> 00:00:50,120
Speaker 1: embarrassing the way she dresses and acts just to get

14
00:00:50,159 --> 00:00:53,280
Speaker 1: attention and public. When people look at her crazy for

15
00:00:53,360 --> 00:00:56,800
Speaker 1: being half dressed, she quickly checks them, and she has

16
00:00:56,800 --> 00:00:59,720
Speaker 1: gotten into a fight for flirting with some woman's man.

17
00:01:00,240 --> 00:01:03,640
Speaker 1: She wears weaves and wigs, which is fine, but they

18
00:01:03,640 --> 00:01:07,920
Speaker 1: are never put on right or they're ratty and tattered.

19
00:01:08,680 --> 00:01:11,920
Speaker 1: She always gives beauty and financial advice on her social

20
00:01:11,959 --> 00:01:15,160
Speaker 1: media posts while she lives in an apartment works in

21
00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:17,679
Speaker 1: a coffee shop and has to borrow money from me

22
00:01:17,760 --> 00:01:21,080
Speaker 1: and other family members at times to pay her monthly bills.

23
00:01:22,080 --> 00:01:24,480
Speaker 1: I have tried to talk to her about how she

24
00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:28,320
Speaker 1: is acting and looking, but she always says I'm jealous

25
00:01:28,319 --> 00:01:31,240
Speaker 1: of her, and she tells other family members that I

26
00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:34,720
Speaker 1: am a hater. I think she needs mental health because

27
00:01:34,760 --> 00:01:37,160
Speaker 1: I know deep down this is not how she wants

28
00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:40,840
Speaker 1: to portray herself and she has to be covering up something.

29
00:01:41,200 --> 00:01:44,280
Speaker 1: The family thinks that as long as she's happy, they're happy.

30
00:01:44,720 --> 00:01:48,480
Speaker 1: So now I'm starting to think they've turned against me too,

31
00:01:48,600 --> 00:01:52,640
Speaker 1: and I'm the only one that's concerned or I'm being

32
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:55,480
Speaker 1: a hater. What do you think? Can you offer me

33
00:01:55,560 --> 00:02:01,040
Speaker 1: any advice on how to deal with her? Wow? Well, honestly,

34
00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:03,200
Speaker 1: I don't think you're a hater. I think you're just

35
00:02:03,240 --> 00:02:06,320
Speaker 1: calling it like you see it, and apparently like it is.

36
00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:08,400
Speaker 1: I mean, I think she is too much based on

37
00:02:08,480 --> 00:02:11,200
Speaker 1: what you said in this letter, with all the posting

38
00:02:11,280 --> 00:02:15,480
Speaker 1: and the way she dresses and flirting with other women's

39
00:02:15,560 --> 00:02:18,640
Speaker 1: men and getting into fights and all of that. And

40
00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:21,120
Speaker 1: I'm with you. I do believe that all women should

41
00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:24,360
Speaker 1: be confident and feel empowered and all of that, But

42
00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:27,400
Speaker 1: there is such a thing as way way too much

43
00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:30,040
Speaker 1: and over the top, and I think that's your cousin's

44
00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:33,000
Speaker 1: I agree with you again. I think she is acting

45
00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:37,560
Speaker 1: out something. I think she is covering up something. Maybe

46
00:02:37,560 --> 00:02:40,000
Speaker 1: she does have low self esteem and she's doing this

47
00:02:40,280 --> 00:02:44,560
Speaker 1: to overcompensate for how she really feels about herself. That

48
00:02:45,040 --> 00:02:48,480
Speaker 1: could happen. I think she does try to seek out attention,

49
00:02:48,560 --> 00:02:51,160
Speaker 1: and she needs attention. I think she needs it desperately

50
00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:54,120
Speaker 1: because you say she's half dressed and all that. But

51
00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:56,280
Speaker 1: if you're a family member and if you really want

52
00:02:56,280 --> 00:02:58,880
Speaker 1: to be a friend and help her, I think you

53
00:02:59,040 --> 00:03:01,800
Speaker 1: just need to stay out of her way. Stop criticizing her,

54
00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:06,600
Speaker 1: you know, just be her, ear her shoulder to cry on,

55
00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:10,040
Speaker 1: be there for her when she needs you. Don't criticize her,

56
00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:13,680
Speaker 1: don't do any of those things. Just be her friend, okay,

57
00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:16,040
Speaker 1: because it sounds like she really needs a friend right

58
00:03:16,040 --> 00:03:19,880
Speaker 1: now because she doesn't like herself very much. Steve, it's

59
00:03:19,960 --> 00:03:26,079
Speaker 1: hard to be a crazy person if you ain't crazy, Yo,

60
00:03:26,240 --> 00:03:31,080
Speaker 1: damn Si. Let's just be real. If you got good

61
00:03:31,080 --> 00:03:33,240
Speaker 1: sense and you had a crazy friend, let me ask

62
00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:36,920
Speaker 1: yourself how long that friendship last? Last? Long? Because you

63
00:03:37,320 --> 00:03:40,480
Speaker 1: can't put up with it, especially if you got six

64
00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:44,400
Speaker 1: Is she delusional? Am I a hater? That's how to

65
00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:47,600
Speaker 1: let us starts. Well, let's get to it. I need

66
00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:50,000
Speaker 1: advice on how to deal with female friend. I believe

67
00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:54,640
Speaker 1: that all women should be confident, regardless of their looks

68
00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:58,800
Speaker 1: or size. I could not agree with you more. But

69
00:03:58,880 --> 00:04:06,000
Speaker 1: my cousin is an exception to this hero. See he

70
00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:10,920
Speaker 1: or she has singled out her cub My cousin is

71
00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:15,720
Speaker 1: exception to this hero. She across the line of confidence

72
00:04:16,200 --> 00:04:20,640
Speaker 1: and now she's downright delusion. Now why is she delusion?

73
00:04:21,640 --> 00:04:26,039
Speaker 1: The latter states she over forty years old, but she

74
00:04:26,160 --> 00:04:32,719
Speaker 1: lived on social media all day. Every day. She's constantly posting.

75
00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:36,960
Speaker 1: Now listen to this, y'all, how fine she is and

76
00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:44,159
Speaker 1: how successful she is? Neither one of these. Now this

77
00:04:44,440 --> 00:04:48,839
Speaker 1: is a come to Jesus moment. Come on, if you're

78
00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:53,040
Speaker 1: instagram steady posting about how fine you are and how

79
00:04:53,080 --> 00:04:58,080
Speaker 1: successful you are, and am family member goes neither one

80
00:04:58,120 --> 00:05:01,760
Speaker 1: of these things. It's true, matter of fact, not a

81
00:05:01,960 --> 00:05:06,320
Speaker 1: damn thing she's saying. It's true, then we have to

82
00:05:06,520 --> 00:05:11,920
Speaker 1: wonder what's wrong. Every man wants huh and every woman

83
00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:15,520
Speaker 1: is jealous, some bass and how she dressed in that.

84
00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:20,239
Speaker 1: She dressed like that to get attention in public. People

85
00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:24,200
Speaker 1: look at her crazy for being half dressed. It ain't

86
00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:27,719
Speaker 1: dressed as she half dressed. What it's what she looked

87
00:05:27,720 --> 00:05:31,880
Speaker 1: like as a half dressed person. See, if you finding

88
00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:36,240
Speaker 1: half dressing, that ain't a bad looks. Don't nobody look

89
00:05:36,279 --> 00:05:40,880
Speaker 1: at you crazy when you finding half dressed? Yeah, but

90
00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:46,520
Speaker 1: when it's just fine going on in your mind? People

91
00:05:46,640 --> 00:05:49,280
Speaker 1: looking at her crazy, she quickly tell what the hell

92
00:05:49,279 --> 00:05:54,040
Speaker 1: are you looking at? They're looking at you? See as

93
00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:57,520
Speaker 1: she knows she looked crazy because these ain't no man

94
00:05:57,640 --> 00:06:01,400
Speaker 1: look at her? She getting looked at like, good man,

95
00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:06,599
Speaker 1: what the hell do she have on? What you think

96
00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:09,839
Speaker 1: I got on? She didn't got into fights flirting with

97
00:06:09,839 --> 00:06:14,039
Speaker 1: a woman's men. Here's all the part. She wears weaves

98
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:16,120
Speaker 1: and wigs, which is fine. Ain't nothing wrong with that,

99
00:06:16,240 --> 00:06:22,039
Speaker 1: I agree, But they are never put on right. Now

100
00:06:23,080 --> 00:06:26,839
Speaker 1: somebody doing her head, don't She probably doing it herself?

101
00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:30,000
Speaker 1: Now when your wig ain't put on right? Let's go

102
00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:32,360
Speaker 1: over what this means. That reminds me of this woman

103
00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:39,160
Speaker 1: that our church name, sister Sister Patly. Sister Patly used

104
00:06:39,160 --> 00:06:42,640
Speaker 1: to just set her wig on her head. And sometimes

105
00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:48,520
Speaker 1: the side burns would be in the front. Now he's

106
00:06:48,560 --> 00:06:51,000
Speaker 1: sitting up in here and the side burn in the

107
00:06:51,160 --> 00:06:54,480
Speaker 1: front and the side burned in the back. How can

108
00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:58,120
Speaker 1: you see? So you got acutely Carol coming down the front,

109
00:06:58,240 --> 00:07:00,880
Speaker 1: and you got a little pony tail in the back.

110
00:07:00,960 --> 00:07:03,719
Speaker 1: But it's just a side burning pun the tail. So

111
00:07:03,880 --> 00:07:07,120
Speaker 1: you look crazy. That's when you're don't put the wig

112
00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:09,320
Speaker 1: on wrong. When we come back, I'll tell you how

113
00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:11,680
Speaker 1: she didn't put this wig up in this weave in

114
00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:16,160
Speaker 1: that the wig. Sister Patley put the wig on wrong.

115
00:07:16,200 --> 00:07:17,880
Speaker 1: I'm gonna show you when we come back. For what

116
00:07:17,960 --> 00:07:21,600
Speaker 1: else this later got a cousin this. She believes that

117
00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:25,560
Speaker 1: all women should be confident, no matter your how you

118
00:07:25,560 --> 00:07:31,880
Speaker 1: your size, or your looks looks, but they got a cousin.

119
00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:35,600
Speaker 1: That's an exception to this movie. It's time for you

120
00:07:35,640 --> 00:07:37,960
Speaker 1: to lose some of your confidence and go sit your head.

121
00:07:37,960 --> 00:07:44,080
Speaker 1: At times she over forty. She posts every day on

122
00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:47,000
Speaker 1: how fine she is and how successful she is, and

123
00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:52,600
Speaker 1: neither one of these. It is true. Every man wanna

124
00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:56,080
Speaker 1: every woman jealous of She got it put up in

125
00:07:56,160 --> 00:07:59,640
Speaker 1: her She dressed crazy people look at her. She checked

126
00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:03,840
Speaker 1: them there you looking at and looking at you. She

127
00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:06,520
Speaker 1: wears weaves and wigs, which is fine, but they ain't

128
00:08:06,520 --> 00:08:10,880
Speaker 1: never put on right. Never, she don't ever put them

129
00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:13,600
Speaker 1: on right. Like I told you, Sister Pattley used to

130
00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:16,400
Speaker 1: wear her wigs sometimes with the side burn in the

131
00:08:16,520 --> 00:08:19,840
Speaker 1: front and the other side learned being the back. So

132
00:08:19,960 --> 00:08:22,200
Speaker 1: she had a little curl coming down in front like

133
00:08:22,240 --> 00:08:25,200
Speaker 1: Michael Jackson. And then she had a little shard, little

134
00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:27,720
Speaker 1: punt thetail in the back that's the other side burn,

135
00:08:28,040 --> 00:08:30,280
Speaker 1: and the big crown in the top. Looked like she

136
00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:32,560
Speaker 1: had a tall head. You got to hear one eye

137
00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:36,680
Speaker 1: cover with that wig. But the front was on the

138
00:08:36,800 --> 00:08:41,360
Speaker 1: right side and it just looked crazy. But it set

139
00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:43,640
Speaker 1: on the head kind of loose. So sometimes like if

140
00:08:43,640 --> 00:08:45,480
Speaker 1: you was to her left and call, and she would

141
00:08:45,480 --> 00:08:53,120
Speaker 1: turn and fit right up under the way. If you called,

142
00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:56,760
Speaker 1: she would turn her head left and be right perfectly

143
00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:59,240
Speaker 1: up under that we then she go back straight. The

144
00:08:59,320 --> 00:09:03,520
Speaker 1: wig just kind the set there. It ain't moved now.

145
00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:08,360
Speaker 1: Her weaves they are ratty and tattered. Yeah yeah, now

146
00:09:08,440 --> 00:09:10,400
Speaker 1: let me tell you what how you they say they

147
00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:12,880
Speaker 1: ain't ever on right. Her wigs and weaving. Let me

148
00:09:12,880 --> 00:09:16,040
Speaker 1: tell you how she's putting this weave on. She's still

149
00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:20,280
Speaker 1: using blue. So what she doing is she pick out

150
00:09:20,320 --> 00:09:24,400
Speaker 1: the hash she want. She glue the strip herself and

151
00:09:24,600 --> 00:09:26,480
Speaker 1: set it on top of the rest of her hair.

152
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:29,520
Speaker 1: I love how you know about weaves and wigs and stuff.

153
00:09:29,520 --> 00:09:32,520
Speaker 1: She got this black glue and she squirted a little

154
00:09:32,520 --> 00:09:34,920
Speaker 1: bit on there. Then she just set it on her head.

155
00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:40,000
Speaker 1: She don't hide the track. Just look at the hall.

156
00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:42,360
Speaker 1: Don't worry about the track. She don't part it and

157
00:09:42,480 --> 00:09:46,160
Speaker 1: do the comb over. She sets it with the glue

158
00:09:46,240 --> 00:09:48,960
Speaker 1: on it on top of her head. You can see

159
00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:51,719
Speaker 1: the whole damn track. But you're on post to look

160
00:09:51,760 --> 00:09:55,040
Speaker 1: at the track. You just look at the hal Yeah, yeah,

161
00:09:55,240 --> 00:09:57,839
Speaker 1: Donna go deep look at me, look at the back

162
00:09:57,840 --> 00:10:05,280
Speaker 1: of it. She gives out beauty and financial advice. She

163
00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:11,439
Speaker 1: worked at a coffee shop and she staying. She tired

164
00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:15,200
Speaker 1: of her talking mother. She needs help paying her bill.

165
00:10:16,120 --> 00:10:18,560
Speaker 1: I've tried to talk to her about acting and looking,

166
00:10:19,200 --> 00:10:22,600
Speaker 1: but she say I'm jealous of her, and she tells

167
00:10:22,640 --> 00:10:25,800
Speaker 1: other family members I'm gonna hate her. I think she

168
00:10:25,880 --> 00:10:30,040
Speaker 1: needs mental health because I know, deep down this is

169
00:10:30,120 --> 00:10:32,400
Speaker 1: not how she wants to portray herself. Oh yes it is.

170
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,080
Speaker 1: And she has to be covering up something. Well it

171
00:10:36,120 --> 00:10:44,960
Speaker 1: ain't then track not covering up, that's what she not coverings.

172
00:10:45,720 --> 00:10:48,040
Speaker 1: And the family thinks as long as she's happy, they

173
00:10:48,160 --> 00:10:51,480
Speaker 1: happy she they have had enough for her. Yeah, so

174
00:10:51,679 --> 00:10:53,800
Speaker 1: she happy to just leave her loan over there with

175
00:10:53,880 --> 00:11:00,439
Speaker 1: her nuttis. She's nutty. This is nuttings she can be. Ye. Now,

176
00:11:00,440 --> 00:11:02,600
Speaker 1: I'm starting to think they've turned against me too, And

177
00:11:02,640 --> 00:11:05,600
Speaker 1: I'm the only one that's concerned or am I being

178
00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:10,040
Speaker 1: a hater? Stop being concerned? She ain't concerned, family ain't concerned.

179
00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:13,000
Speaker 1: Sometimes you just gotta let people do them, let it

180
00:11:13,040 --> 00:11:18,080
Speaker 1: all happen. Can you offer me an advice on how

181
00:11:18,080 --> 00:11:20,280
Speaker 1: to deal with her? Just let it happen, stay out

182
00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:23,559
Speaker 1: her life, let her do hard. She thinks she fine,

183
00:11:23,640 --> 00:11:26,080
Speaker 1: She ain't let her. Ain't nobody gonna tell us you fine?

184
00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:31,760
Speaker 1: Just let her go ahead on it works out? Justifying

185
00:11:31,880 --> 00:11:38,920
Speaker 1: this way now what she is? Delusion? Oh yeah, the

186
00:11:39,679 --> 00:11:43,120
Speaker 1: one she's writing about, the forty year old. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

187
00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:47,400
Speaker 1: And you got to tell her to at least push

188
00:11:47,480 --> 00:11:51,720
Speaker 1: that we've under something and turn it though, And that

189
00:11:51,840 --> 00:11:54,600
Speaker 1: week you got to turn it and tape it down

190
00:11:54,640 --> 00:11:58,560
Speaker 1: so we can stop shifting. You can't do it. Just

191
00:11:58,640 --> 00:12:00,600
Speaker 1: had your week just sitting on your Here you turn

192
00:12:00,760 --> 00:12:08,440
Speaker 1: right or left and it don't move. Yeah. Aint kind

193
00:12:08,440 --> 00:12:13,840
Speaker 1: of got that sweet poly pure brewd hair cut. Yeah yeah,

194
00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:18,400
Speaker 1: and just let it go. We don't have no relatives

195
00:12:18,400 --> 00:12:20,760
Speaker 1: in our family like that. My family talks to you

196
00:12:20,880 --> 00:12:26,280
Speaker 1: and about you, to your face, to your faith. Sweetie,

197
00:12:26,280 --> 00:12:29,240
Speaker 1: where you're going? My answer to sweetie, sweetie, where you're going?

198
00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:34,199
Speaker 1: That dress don't fit you nowhere. You got everything the

199
00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:36,280
Speaker 1: law gave you. Ain't no party posts. See, we're looking

200
00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:39,959
Speaker 1: at everything. We looking at everything. And you need a

201
00:12:40,040 --> 00:12:44,040
Speaker 1: sports braw sweetie. You're a sports braul. You don't need

202
00:12:44,080 --> 00:12:48,040
Speaker 1: the regular one. You need some pulling in shaping to yourself.

203
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:51,280
Speaker 1: You've been running around just being slapped in your face

204
00:12:51,320 --> 00:12:56,040
Speaker 1: like you're running tracks, and you need some spanks. You're

205
00:12:56,040 --> 00:13:00,439
Speaker 1: not familiar with spanks, You too lumpy, old school right there, lumpy,

206
00:13:00,559 --> 00:13:07,840
Speaker 1: You need some spinks. You really need a girden. What

207
00:13:07,920 --> 00:13:10,320
Speaker 1: about that wig? Though they say anything about there, You

208
00:13:10,360 --> 00:13:15,559
Speaker 1: guys to take that off in your head. It's heavy too. There.

209
00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:19,360
Speaker 1: You be better off letting Steve do your hair. He

210
00:13:19,440 --> 00:13:21,800
Speaker 1: don't no damn thing about doing he he ain't got none.

211
00:13:21,840 --> 00:13:24,120
Speaker 1: Look at him sitting over that big little ball head basket.

212
00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:27,439
Speaker 1: I never liked it when it cut his hair. I

213
00:13:27,480 --> 00:13:32,440
Speaker 1: thought it was stupid. Then cut your damn half stupid.

214
00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:34,880
Speaker 1: I don't know how will Margery let him do that?

215
00:13:35,679 --> 00:13:38,719
Speaker 1: What about every man wanting her and every woman being

216
00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:41,280
Speaker 1: jealous to her? She buy herself every time you say,

217
00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:45,480
Speaker 1: I don't know who wanna? We ain't bother to tell

218
00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:49,800
Speaker 1: her sitting over there with her delusional ass like she

219
00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:58,120
Speaker 1: find and ass wide as a cubicle, sitting up in here,

220
00:13:58,200 --> 00:14:02,079
Speaker 1: ass all out to Cuba, and tell me mar she

221
00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:04,360
Speaker 1: gonna went by one of them tread meals where you

222
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:08,640
Speaker 1: can stand up and walk while you work. We put

223
00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:14,040
Speaker 1: the tatsides off of that thing. You can email us

224
00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:16,880
Speaker 1: your Instagram as your thoughts on today's Strawberry letter at

225
00:14:16,920 --> 00:14:20,520
Speaker 1: Steve Harvey f M. You're listening to the Steve Harvey

226
00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:21,160
Speaker 1: Morning Show