Speaker 1: Kutbooms.
Speaker 2: If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
Speaker 2: a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
Speaker 2: of the Old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He
Speaker 2: treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
Speaker 2: rich pill poppers in the penthouse.
Speaker 3: Wow.
Speaker 2: The Clearinghouse of Hot takes break free for something special.
Speaker 2: The Fifth Hour with Ben Mallard starts right now in.
Speaker 1: The air everywhere.
Speaker 4: The Fifth Hour with Me, Ben Mallor and Danny g
Speaker 4: Radio A Happy Friday to you.
Speaker 1: Although you can listen to this oneever.
Speaker 4: This is more of an evergreen pod than what we
Speaker 4: normally do on the Fifth Hour. But it is the
Speaker 4: summer of twenty twenty five. We're in July, and come one,
Speaker 4: come all, gather around the magic pod box. You won't
Speaker 4: believe your ears. Be ready to smile. I'm talking cheshire
Speaker 4: Cat smile from ear to ear. It is time to
Speaker 4: pour one out for our homie. A Bonus Malard monologue
Speaker 4: in honor of the late great former Cub manager Lee
Speaker 4: Ilia and Phillies manager who left this mortal coil. And
Speaker 4: he left this world with a legendary microphone meltdown for
Speaker 4: the ages, the Michael Angelo of the coaching Rant. People
Speaker 4: talk about the greatest of all time. They did a
Speaker 4: rant on my overnight show last night. You might have
Speaker 4: heard it on the Ben Maler Show, and I mentioned
Speaker 4: that people talk about who's the greatest quarterback in the NFL,
Speaker 4: and some people will say Back in the day, they'd
Speaker 4: say Joe Montana. Now everyone says, well, it's Tom Brady.
Speaker 4: Tom Brady's the greatest of all time. They say who's
Speaker 4: the greatest baseball player? Most people say, Babe Ruth is
Speaker 4: the greatest baseball player. Oh, there's a name Willie Mays
Speaker 4: or someone like that, but most people say Babe Ruth.
Speaker 4: They say, who's the greatest basketball player of all time?
Speaker 1: The real ones know it's Michael Jordan. The real ones
Speaker 1: know it's Michael Jordan.
Speaker 4: You say, who's the person that gave us the greatest
Speaker 4: rant of all time into a news conference?
Speaker 1: And that's Lee Ilia.
Speaker 4: So that is the one that stands out, the Michelangelo
Speaker 4: of the coaching Rant. So in his memory, in his honor,
Speaker 4: we are cracking open the vault on the Fifth Hour podcast.
Speaker 4: Here it's Benny's big board, not a list, not a
Speaker 4: list to Terry in England. Now I was thinking of
Speaker 4: doing this anyway, and then my senior advisor, a platinum
Speaker 4: artist who is back in the mallor Palooza this year,
Speaker 4: our friend Jayscoop, and he had messaged me. He works
Speaker 4: in collaboration with just Josh, and he's like, this would
Speaker 4: be a great idea. So the again, not a list.
Speaker 4: I want to make sure that's on the record.
Speaker 1: Not a list.
Speaker 4: But this is Benny's big board, the five greatest microphone
Speaker 4: meltdowns in US sports history. Now this is the coaching,
Speaker 4: and I left a lot of the basketball. In fact,
Speaker 4: there's no basketball in this. I can do a separate
Speaker 4: subcategory in basketball. Lee Ilia was a baseball manager, of course,
Speaker 4: and so this is almost all baseball and mostly football.
Speaker 4: Because it's not an ordinary big board, it's a full on,
Speaker 4: off the cuff, top of my dome compilation. These are
Speaker 4: the most epic, unhinged rants to ever grace a presser,
Speaker 4: at least that I remember today that I cobbled this together.
Speaker 4: So if we missed any of your favorites, and we did,
Speaker 4: you know we only have limited time here.
Speaker 1: Hit us up. Let us know.
Speaker 4: You can email me real fifth hour at gmail dot com,
Speaker 4: Real fifth Hour at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: We'll try to accommodate you.
Speaker 4: Now, before we get to the five at the very
Speaker 4: top of Big Ben's Big board, we have the honorable
Speaker 4: mention category because we got to give props before we
Speaker 4: get to the big dogs, the big dogs. We're going
Speaker 4: to start out in Cincinnati, home of legendary show contributors
Speaker 4: like just Josh, who we already mentioned, and Justin and Cincinnati.
Speaker 4: So the Reds have been a glorified dumpster fire for years,
Speaker 4: but one of the great rants, and it reached honorable
Speaker 4: mentioned status, was a number of years back the Red
Speaker 4: set of manager named Brian Price. Let's just say the
Speaker 4: price was not right. As Price was upset, the Reds
Speaker 4: beat writers had led out a secret about a roster
Speaker 4: move the Reds were going to make before the team
Speaker 4: announced it, and that led to a record setting seventy
Speaker 4: seven f bombs in a tirade that while it didn't
Speaker 4: make the top five, it did make honorable mention. Let's
Speaker 4: give you a little taste of this. This is Brian
Speaker 4: Price years ago the res and you're probably about ten
Speaker 4: years ago or so. Listen to him, and he starts
Speaker 4: out rather come and next thing you know, it's F this,
Speaker 4: F that, F you blah blah blah.
Speaker 1: Take a listen.
Speaker 5: You know, look, I don't need you guys to be
Speaker 5: fans of the Reds.
Speaker 6: I just need to know that if there's something that
Speaker 6: we want to keep here, that it stays here. We
Speaker 6: don't need to know that Tucker Barnhart's in the airport
Speaker 6: when we haven't spoken to Kyle Skipworth. I think we
Speaker 6: owe them and that kid the right to be called
Speaker 6: and told that he's going to be sent down, as
Speaker 6: opposed to reading that Tucker Barnhart's on his way and
Speaker 6: from Louisville. I just I don't get it. I don't
Speaker 6: get why it's got to be this way. Has it
Speaker 6: always been this way? Where we just tell everybody everything?
Speaker 6: So every opponent that we have has to know exactly
Speaker 6: what we have, relievers are available, which guys are here,
Speaker 6: and which guys aren't here when they can play what
Speaker 6: they can do. It's nobody's in business. It's certainly not
Speaker 6: the opponent's business. We've got to deal with this. I
Speaker 6: like to talk, and I have spoken as candidly as
Speaker 6: I can with you people. If if that's not good enough.
Speaker 6: I won't say a thing. I'll go yes, sir, no certain,
Speaker 6: and I can do that. But I've been as candid
Speaker 6: as I can be about this team and our players,
Speaker 6: and we got to deal with this. Every team that
Speaker 6: we play has to know everything guy that's here and
Speaker 6: what they can and can do.
Speaker 5: Me so in disgrace and sick of it.
Speaker 6: It's hard enough to win here to have every opponent
Speaker 6: know exactly what we bring to the table every day.
Speaker 5: I don't like it.
Speaker 6: That's what I'm saying, to make it very clear. I
Speaker 6: don't like the way that this is going at all.
Speaker 5: I don't like it.
Speaker 6: I don't think you guys need to know everything, and
Speaker 6: I certainly don't think that you need to see something
Speaker 6: and tweet it out there and make it in world event.
Speaker 6: How do we benefit from them knowing that we don't
Speaker 6: have Devin Mesarako?
Speaker 5: How do we benefit from that they benefit from it?
Speaker 6: I just want to know how we benefit from these
Speaker 6: people knowing that we don't have a player here. Can
Speaker 6: you answer that? How is that good for the Reds to? Yeah, well,
Speaker 6: it's making my job harder, Sure it is, well, thank you.
Speaker 6: I don't just don't know if that's what we're supposed
Speaker 6: to do, or we supposed to open up everything here
Speaker 6: for everybody to know all the time. So it's all
Speaker 6: I want to know what your expectations are, because me,
Speaker 6: if I got to tell these guys we got to
Speaker 6: go out there and they know we don't have Devin Mesuraka,
Speaker 6: what benefit is that to me as a manager and our.
Speaker 5: Team to win a game?
Speaker 1: All right?
Speaker 4: So that Devin Mesurako or whatever the guy's name was,
Speaker 4: and that was Brian pie seventy seven f bomps. That's
Speaker 4: just a little taste of it.
Speaker 1: Got kind of boring. He kept saying the F word,
Speaker 1: but it got kind of boring. That was the meaty
Speaker 1: part of it.
Speaker 4: And this is the honorable mention on Big Ben's big board.
Speaker 4: These are some of the great tie raids in honor
Speaker 4: of Lee Ilia. Now he tried to find the top
Speaker 4: audio on John McKay.
Speaker 1: This is way back.
Speaker 4: We're going back to the nineteen seventies, so this is
Speaker 4: way over fifty years ago. John McKay was one of
Speaker 4: the great college football coaches of all time. At the
Speaker 4: University of Southern California. He wasn't getting paid a lot
Speaker 4: of money. They didn't pay a lot of money back
Speaker 4: in those days. He was getting low balled and near
Speaker 4: the end of his career he's like, gos, screw it.
Speaker 4: The Tampa Bay Buccaneers were an expansion team and this
Speaker 4: renegade owner, Hugh Culverhouse, who was despised, he actually was
Speaker 4: like the godfather of the La Rams.
Speaker 1: That's a whole different story.
Speaker 4: Yeah, the guy that owned the Bucks offered John McKay
Speaker 4: to more than double his salary. They made him like
Speaker 4: the highest paid coach in football at the time. So
Speaker 4: John McKay left the University of Southern California and he
Speaker 4: went all the way to Tampa to coach the Buccaneers.
Speaker 4: And they were an expansion team. They were terrible, and
Speaker 4: John McKay was a quote machine. Now one of the
Speaker 4: great quotes of all time. I tried to find the auto,
Speaker 4: I couldn't find it. It was when he was asked
Speaker 4: about his team's execution and he famously said, I'm in
Speaker 4: favor of it. Now, they give you an idea how
Speaker 4: crazy times have changed. A few years back. I forget
Speaker 4: who the coach was, but a coach used that line
Speaker 4: like I think it was an NFL coach used that
Speaker 4: line might have been a college coach, but they just
Speaker 4: repeated it and the wokesters on social media.
Speaker 1: I can't believe the coach said that.
Speaker 4: So I didn't find that sound bite, but I did
Speaker 4: go to the archive from This is a clip, old clip.
Speaker 1: From NFL films. I think this came from.
Speaker 4: This is some of the highlights of John McKay. He
Speaker 4: was coaching the Buccaneers. He's on the sidelines and listen,
Speaker 4: I'll give you a little taste of this. It's honorable
Speaker 4: mention John McKay. We're going back over fifty years and
Speaker 4: here's John McKay on the sidelines, miked up for NFL films,
Speaker 4: and listen to him critique his Tampa Bay Buccaneers in
Speaker 4: real time.
Speaker 1: Take a listen, don't hit him, don't hit him.
Speaker 7: Well, let's say, oh, jeezus, gentlemen, who can't stop a
Speaker 7: pass or a run.
Speaker 5: We're in great shape.
Speaker 7: I have a lot of careers going in Monday.
Speaker 5: Yeah, let's play everybody. We're just hard.
Speaker 8: We're not proving one thing here.
Speaker 5: We we prove we can't play.
Speaker 7: That's not it's just he was a football Another damn chicken.
Speaker 5: We got out here.
Speaker 7: That's what I say, we got some many fucks and
Speaker 7: no sour. Yeah, yeah, I would figure that you would
Speaker 7: stagger around. What's wrong with playing mont in the game?
Speaker 7: He tackles, He's only got one chass Megas football team.
Speaker 7: He asks like he's got it made. He ain't got
Speaker 7: nothing made.
Speaker 1: All right?
Speaker 4: So that was that was John McKay, Uh chicken.
Speaker 1: That was pretty good. I like that.
Speaker 4: So that's that's back in the nineteen seventies. Another honorable mention, Uh,
Speaker 4: the greatest of all time Bobby Knight college basketball. So
Speaker 4: I said there were no coaches from basketball liede bad
Speaker 4: job by me.
Speaker 1: There's no NBA coaches. But this is Bobby Knight.
Speaker 4: And going back many years, he was still at Indiana
Speaker 4: Legendary Indiana Who's yours college basketball coach? Also coached at
Speaker 4: Texas Tech. And here is Bobby Knight giving out advice
Speaker 4: on what he wanted to happen when he finally died.
Speaker 4: Now Bobby's dead, but listen to this wisdom from the
Speaker 4: late great Bobby Knight.
Speaker 5: When my time.
Speaker 9: On Earth is gone and my activities here are past,
Speaker 9: I want they bury me upside down and my critics
Speaker 9: can kiss my and.
Speaker 1: The crowd goes wild.
Speaker 4: The crowd goes wild as Bobby Knight walks away. All right,
Speaker 4: Another honorable mention on this fifth hour honoring Lee Ilia.
Speaker 4: We go to New Jersey and a man who got
Speaker 4: a television career because of a roughly thirty second rant
Speaker 4: to the media. We are talking going back twenty five years.
Speaker 4: I believe this soundbite's from This is HERM Edwards and
Speaker 4: it is an infamous SoundBite. Did not make the top
Speaker 4: five on Big Ben's Big Board. But here's HERM Edwards
Speaker 4: coaching the Jets. Things were not going well, because things
Speaker 4: never go well when you're coaching the Jets. But here's
Speaker 4: HERM Edwards on what it is all about.
Speaker 1: Take a listen.
Speaker 10: This was great about sports. This is what the greatest
Speaker 10: thing about sports is. You play to win the game. Hello,
Speaker 10: You play to win the game. You don't play to
Speaker 10: just play it. That's a great thing about sports. You
Speaker 10: play to win, and I don't care if you don't
Speaker 10: have any wins. You go play to win. When you start.
Speaker 5: Telling me it doesn't matter to retire.
Speaker 1: Get out, get out.
Speaker 4: That was HERM Edwards giving a sermon that is still
Speaker 4: gospel to this day. People that are young that never
Speaker 4: even knew who horm Edwards were or was.
Speaker 1: Rather like, oh herm Edwards.
Speaker 4: The last honorable mention before we get in to the
Speaker 4: top five on Big Ben's Big Board. This is not
Speaker 4: on the top five. It is my personal favorite and
Speaker 4: I love this. Back when we used to have sound
Speaker 4: on the show and drops on the show, and back
Speaker 4: in the old days, we played a lot of drops
Speaker 4: from this particular guy. It's a college football coach at
Speaker 4: Coastal Carolina. The Shanta Clears, I believe, is what their
Speaker 4: mascot is. Here is David Bennett, the only college coach
Speaker 4: to sneak into Big Ben's Big Board in terms of
Speaker 4: honorable mention. He was at Coastal Carolina and for some
Speaker 4: reason he started talking about well, he started talking about
Speaker 4: cats and dogs and it well, just listen.
Speaker 3: Trying to get our two boys ready to gear him
Speaker 3: a goff ternment foot prints right, twelve cats live across
Speaker 3: the road.
Speaker 5: Our door's open.
Speaker 1: Screens broke. We need to get a new screen door.
Speaker 3: But the screens broke, so you can come in through
Speaker 3: the screen, but you can't get back out of I
Speaker 3: turned to look, there's a little kitty cat in our kitchen,
Speaker 3: so I.
Speaker 1: Said, what are you doing in here? A little kitty cat.
Speaker 1: By that time, the cat turns, tries to get back out,
Speaker 1: that scream won't go that way.
Speaker 3: Cat starts going all crazy, and I told our players
Speaker 3: we need more dogs. Bows barging in the back after
Speaker 3: go shut bow up, mels like, what's going on? It
Speaker 3: says the cat and house cat in the house. I said,
Speaker 3: it is a cat in the house. So I told
Speaker 3: our players, I try to let it out the front door.
Speaker 3: The cat's still going crazy in there, and I told
Speaker 3: our players.
Speaker 1: You needy bit more like a dog. We don't need
Speaker 1: a bunch of cats in here. Looking in the mirror,
Speaker 1: I look good.
Speaker 3: I got my extra bands on, I got my other shoes.
Speaker 1: Be a dog.
Speaker 3: We don't need no mowns. We don't need no cats.
Speaker 3: We need more dogs.
Speaker 4: We all need more dogs. We all need more dogs.
Speaker 4: That was great, David Bennett. I don't know what happened
Speaker 4: to him. I looked it up a couple of years back.
Speaker 4: I don't know what he's doing. He's probably retired at
Speaker 4: this point. That was a years ago rant from the
Speaker 4: coach at Coastal Carolina. And as you may remember, my
Speaker 4: father in law my in laws have a house in
Speaker 4: North Carolina, and I was down there a couple years
Speaker 4: back with the wife. We went to visit him, and
Speaker 4: we drove by Coastal Carolina. And when we were driving
Speaker 4: by Coastal Carolina, I was like, this is a big deal.
Speaker 4: In fact, they had an ad up in the airport
Speaker 4: we flew into. I think it was in Myrtle Beach,
Speaker 4: I believe any I don't remember where. It's been a
Speaker 4: little while, but.
Speaker 1: They had a sign up for the school. I was like,
Speaker 1: that's the school.
Speaker 4: The Cats and Dogs guy went to. That's the guy
Speaker 4: right there. That was huge, huge, all right, Now turning
Speaker 4: the page, Let's go to the main event. Now, Benny's
Speaker 4: big board. Not a list, not a list. Five microphone
Speaker 4: meltdowns in US sports history, the Coaching edition, And we
Speaker 4: go to number five.
Speaker 1: Numbber five, Numbber five, an underrated rant old school.
Speaker 4: We go now to Minnesota. He was the head coach
Speaker 4: of the Old Minnesota Vikings. Jerry Burns. Jerry Burns, and
Speaker 4: he came out swinging, defending his offensive coordinator with a
Speaker 4: profanity laced outburst that was equal parts loyalty in lunacy
Speaker 4: as Jerry Burns worked himself up burnsy into an absolute tizzy,
Speaker 4: spitting fire at the football media who was questioning the
Speaker 4: Minnesota Vikings play calling. And he was a poet, a
Speaker 4: poet of rage. Let's go in the hot tub time
Speaker 4: machine back. I think this is in the late eighties,
Speaker 4: early nineth these. Here is Jerry Burns, the Minnesota Vikings
Speaker 4: head coach, passionately, passionately defending his offensive coordinator. And listen
Speaker 4: to Jerry Burns. Let's go to the audio tape.
Speaker 11: Let me say something. As long as I'm in his
Speaker 11: fucking job, Schnelker will be the offensive coach.
Speaker 1: I mean, no, no question fucking about that.
Speaker 5: Fucking question about that.
Speaker 11: We I don't like the name names after a fucking
Speaker 11: after a fucking game, but we we can't. We can't
Speaker 11: be responsible for the block, and we can't be responsible
Speaker 11: for the guys jumping off side. We can't be responsible
Speaker 11: for the fun we get down there and and uh
Speaker 11: and it was a dumb play by by Anderson.
Speaker 1: I love I love Anderson, but it was a numb
Speaker 1: fucking play.
Speaker 11: When he had with his foot was shoe was coming
Speaker 11: off up the line, screat we were hard to take
Speaker 11: time out we had a fucking trap play called and
Speaker 11: and his fucking shoe comes off.
Speaker 1: That ain't that ain't bought Schneker's fall.
Speaker 11: We have another fucking trap play and then he picks
Speaker 11: up his fucking feet, he walks in.
Speaker 1: We got the fucking the pass.
Speaker 11: Who ac out there in the flat is the boss
Speaker 11: throwing in low?
Speaker 1: That is a Sneker's fault.
Speaker 11: We got right down there, we got we got the
Speaker 11: second down and then what the hell two years ago
Speaker 11: out of what fifteen forty, whatever the hell it was,
Speaker 11: and Irwin, she jumps off side. These are things that
Speaker 11: have been hurting us all along, the little things. We're
Speaker 11: working at him to stop them. We goog the ball
Speaker 11: good today. We went down there and we didn't get
Speaker 11: the bone hands on him.
Speaker 1: He wouldn't stin.
Speaker 5: I think we did.
Speaker 1: Yeah, all right.
Speaker 4: So that was Jerry Burns after a win, ranting and
Speaker 4: defending somebody named Bob Snelker, who was the offensive coordinator
Speaker 4: of the Vikings back in I think this was nineteen
Speaker 4: eighty nine, So that was number five on Big Ben's
Speaker 4: big board.
Speaker 1: Jerry Burns defending Bob Schnelker.
Speaker 4: Now the number four, number four a oldie, but a
Speaker 4: goodie an NFL coach undressing one of his players. Mike
Speaker 4: Singletary was the baddest man on the planet when he
Speaker 4: played linebacker for Mike Ditka, and Dicka almost made this list.
Speaker 4: We were trying to find there were a couple of
Speaker 4: Mike Dicka rants we didn't. We weren't able to find
Speaker 4: the audio. So we're going with Mike Singletary here at
Speaker 4: number four. He was very briefly the forty nine ers
Speaker 4: head coach, and they had a first round pick who
Speaker 4: was a athletic gift from the gods. Fact, we had
Speaker 4: this guy on this podcast a while back, Vernon Davis,
Speaker 4: and things were not going well early in Vernon Davis's
Speaker 4: career built like a Donnas. He wasn't playing up to
Speaker 4: Mike Singletary's standard as the forty nine er coach, and
Speaker 4: so Mike Singletary, in front of the media on national
Speaker 4: television in a postgame news conference, pantched Vernon Davis. In fact,
Speaker 4: it got to the point where Mike Singletary on Mike,
Speaker 4: you'll hear it here. Mike Singletary not just called out
Speaker 4: Vernon Davis, it was a public execution where he essentially
Speaker 4: said they would be better off playing a man short.
Speaker 1: Let's go to the audio tape.
Speaker 4: Here is Mike Singletary whose number four.
Speaker 1: Take a listen, Vernon, Vernon.
Speaker 12: Just was something that I told everybody at the very
Speaker 12: beginning of the week. I will not tolerate players that
Speaker 12: think it's about them when it's about the team and
Speaker 12: we cannot make we cannot make decisions that costs the
Speaker 12: team and then come off the sideline and it's nonchalant, No,
Speaker 12: you know what. This is how I believe. Okay, I'm
Speaker 12: from the old school.
Speaker 1: I believe this. I would rather play with ten people.
Speaker 12: And just get penalized all the way until we got
Speaker 12: to do something else, rather than play with eleven when
Speaker 12: I know that right now that person has not sold
Speaker 12: out to be a part of this team. It is
Speaker 12: more about them than it is about the team. Cannot
Speaker 12: play with him, cannot win with him, cannot coach with him,
Speaker 12: can't do it.
Speaker 4: So good, so good. I was really pulling for Mike Singletary.
Speaker 4: I remember being on the air at Fox Sports Radio.
Speaker 4: It was like, I want this. I need Mike Singletary
Speaker 4: to be a good head coach, just because of stuff
Speaker 4: like that. Unfortunately, he sucked as a head coach. It
Speaker 4: didn't work out, but we will always have that, and
Speaker 4: that is Mike Singletary, number four, number four on the
Speaker 4: big Board.
Speaker 1: Not a list.
Speaker 4: Cannot play with him, cannot win with him, cannot coach
Speaker 4: with him, can't do it, can't do it. And I
Speaker 4: realize we're on an audio only thing here on the podcast.
Speaker 4: But Mike Singletary's eyes, it's like he's a superpower. He
Speaker 4: can literally burn you up with his eyes and just
Speaker 4: apps great. Not at number three, number three on Big
Speaker 4: Ben's Big Board.
Speaker 1: These are the greatest rants in honor of the late
Speaker 1: greatly Aelia who left us.
Speaker 4: This week we pour out this big board in honor
Speaker 4: of Lee Ilia. So now we get to the Fox
Speaker 4: Sports Radio Alumni edition and someone that we had on
Speaker 4: this podcast as well. I got to do some radio
Speaker 4: shows with him. Very exciting for me. I was a
Speaker 4: fan of him. I knew who he was. I'd watched
Speaker 4: him when I was younger. I got to do some
Speaker 4: shows with him at Fox Sports Radio. The great Jim Mora.
Speaker 4: Now for many people Playoffs is the greatest rant of
Speaker 4: all time, but not for us, Not for us, and
Speaker 4: not my big board.
Speaker 1: It's not your big board, it's my big board.
Speaker 4: So for me, we're going to go back to Jim Mora,
Speaker 4: who was coaching the Saints nineteen ninety six.
Speaker 1: This comes from it was.
Speaker 4: Week eight, all right, this is the eighth game of
Speaker 4: the nineteen ninety six season. And the Saints came out
Speaker 4: and they were terrible, and Jim Mora calmly walked out
Speaker 4: wearing his Saints gear, his coaching gear. After the Saints
Speaker 4: had lost the game, he got to kind of a
Speaker 4: makeshift podium and he unleashed an absolute masterpiece.
Speaker 1: This is masterpiece theater.
Speaker 4: Frustrated, and he gave us one of the all time
Speaker 4: great phrases in this exasperated meltdown.
Speaker 1: Take a listen to.
Speaker 4: Jim Mora as he gave his state of the New
Speaker 4: Orleans Saints address, as only coach Mora could do.
Speaker 1: Take a listen.
Speaker 13: Well, what happened was that second game we got our
Speaker 13: ass kicked, or the second half we just got our
Speaker 13: ass totally kicked. We couldn't do Diddley Pooh offensively. We
Speaker 13: couldn't make a first down. We couldn't run the ball.
Speaker 13: We didn't try to run the ball. We couldn't complete
Speaker 13: a pass, We sucked the second half. We sucked. We
Speaker 13: couldn't stop the run. Every time they got the ball
Speaker 13: and went down and got points. We got our ass
Speaker 13: totally kicked in the second half. That's what it boiled
Speaker 13: down to. It was a horse performance in the second half.
Speaker 14: Four.
Speaker 13: I'm totally embarrassed and totally ashamed coaching art were our
Speaker 13: coaching did a horrible job. The players did a horrible job.
Speaker 13: We got our ass kick in that second half. It sucked,
Speaker 13: it stuck.
Speaker 4: How do you really feel, coach more, how do you
Speaker 4: really feel? All that was so good, so great, loved, loved.
Speaker 4: Jim Mora one of the greatest people.
Speaker 7: Know.
Speaker 4: There's a lot of athletes and coaches or whatever that
Speaker 4: have passed through the building in Sherman Oaks over the years,
Speaker 4: but Jim Mora just great, just absolutely wonderful. The stories
Speaker 4: he told some that we can't repeat, wonderful. But that
Speaker 4: line we couldn't do Diddley Pooh offensively. That is the
Speaker 4: line that made this number three on Big Ben's Big
Speaker 4: Board on this special edition of the Fifth Hour Podcast.
Speaker 4: Now we move up to Bert Dude, number two and
Speaker 4: number two, another member of the Fox Sports Radio alumni Association.
Speaker 4: I I got a couple of stories about this guy.
Speaker 4: But let's get right into it. We're going way back.
Speaker 4: The Arizona Cardinals.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I had to go there, right.
Speaker 4: The Arizona Cardinals had just lost a game against the
Speaker 4: Chicago Bears. I believe this game was on a Monday night,
Speaker 4: and Dennis Green got up to the dais. The Bears
Speaker 4: had come back in the game against the Cardinals. The
Speaker 4: Arizona thought they were going to win the game, and
Speaker 4: Dennis Green eyes wide voice cracking, he had a nuclear
Speaker 4: meltdown at the podium and take a listen to the
Speaker 4: great late Dennis Green.
Speaker 15: Wait, the Bears are what we thought they were. What
Speaker 15: we thought they were. We played them in preseason. Who
Speaker 15: the hell takes a third game in a preseason like
Speaker 15: a s boop? We played them the third game, everybody
Speaker 15: played three quarters or who we thought they were.
Speaker 16: Now, that's why we took the damn field. Now, if
Speaker 16: you want to crown him, they crown their ass. But
Speaker 16: they are who we thought they were. And we got
Speaker 16: about the hook all.
Speaker 1: Right, Thank you? Kay was so good.
Speaker 4: So when I was doing college radio at Saddleback College,
Speaker 4: it was a it was a DJ at the college
Speaker 4: radio station was a jazz format, and the program director,
Speaker 4: who was my professor, not really a program director, he's like, hey,
Speaker 4: there's this guy.
Speaker 1: He knew I liked sports.
Speaker 4: He said, this guy that's a coach in the NFL
Speaker 4: and he's a jazz musician and he wants to come
Speaker 4: by and promote his music and we want you to
Speaker 4: talk to him.
Speaker 1: Because I was like the only DJ that liked sports.
Speaker 1: So I was like, sure, I'd love to do it.
Speaker 4: And he said, he's the guy that coaches the Minnesota Vikings.
Speaker 1: I said really.
Speaker 4: I was like, oh, I think I know he used
Speaker 4: to coach at Stanford, and yeah, yeah, that's the guy.
Speaker 1: And so it was.
Speaker 4: It was Dennis Green, and we had him in and
Speaker 4: we played his music and we talked to him and
Speaker 4: he was great and wonderful. He was so kind to me.
Speaker 4: He handed me his business card. He said, listen, Ben,
Speaker 4: anytime that we are in As you know, the Vikings
Speaker 4: were in southern California at that time, The Raiders and
Speaker 4: the Rams were in LA. The Chargers were in San Diego,
Speaker 4: and Saddleback is in Orange County, but south Orange County,
Speaker 4: so it's kind of in between LA and San Diego
Speaker 4: and Coach Green was like, hey, listen, anytime the Vikings
Speaker 4: are in the area and you want tickets, here's my
Speaker 4: personal card. He gave me the card. He gave the
Speaker 4: extension to his secretary. He says, you call her up
Speaker 4: and this is the card. I'll get you tickets. No,
Speaker 4: I never did it, but it was just really cool.
Speaker 4: It was like the coolest thing at Dennis Green. Like, I'm,
Speaker 4: you know, fresh out of high school. I'm barely in
Speaker 4: college and Dennis Green is NFL head coach, the coach
Speaker 4: of the Minnesota Vikings is like, hey, now we'll hook
Speaker 4: you up. And then I got to work. Very briefly,
Speaker 4: I say I got to work with him. I don't
Speaker 4: know if that's the right way to say it, but
Speaker 4: Dennis Green was hired at Fox Sports Radio after he
Speaker 4: left the Cardinals.
Speaker 1: Very briefly, I say, very briefly.
Speaker 4: I'm trying to do this off memory as I remember it.
Speaker 4: Dennis Green worked at Fox Sports Radio for approximately two weeks.
Speaker 4: His agent got him the job at FSR, so he's
Speaker 4: working at Fox Sports Radio.
Speaker 1: Fine. Well.
Speaker 4: After taking the job, ESPN, which pays a little bit
Speaker 4: more money than Fox Sports Radio offered Dennis Green a
Speaker 4: TV job, so he was there about two weeks.
Speaker 1: It might have been a little longer than that, but
Speaker 1: it wasn't much longer than that. And Dennis Green.
Speaker 4: Left and skidaddled off to television, and that was the
Speaker 4: last we saw of the late great Dennis Green. Now
Speaker 4: do number one on Big Ben's Big Board. And here
Speaker 4: we are the very top of the mountain, the peak
Speaker 4: of the Mountain, paying tribute to the King of all meltdowns.
Speaker 1: Lee Elia.
Speaker 4: Yeah, the man, the myth, the microphone murderer set this up.
Speaker 4: We played it on the Overnight Show. But I'm gonna
Speaker 4: play the extended dance remix. And I don't think this
Speaker 4: is edited as far as like the bad words, you'll
Speaker 4: hear all the bad words.
Speaker 1: So it's the early nineteen eighties.
Speaker 4: It's April twenty ninth of nineteen eighty three. I am
Speaker 4: a child. I didn't know about this at the time,
Speaker 4: but it happened on my birthday. So the Cubs had
Speaker 4: just gotten their ass kicked by the Dodgers, and the
Speaker 4: Cub fans were booing it Wrigley. The players in those
Speaker 4: days had to go out to the outfield. The clubhouse
Speaker 4: was in center field, so they had to go out
Speaker 4: to the outfield. The Chicago Cup fans were throwing all
Speaker 4: over the players, and lee Ilia found out about this,
Speaker 4: and he did not appreciate it. It is the gold standard.
Speaker 4: There are some lines in here that can never be matched.
Speaker 4: They're the all time greatest. He went on and on
Speaker 4: and on. It was drill sergeant like, So let's go
Speaker 4: back in the hot, tough time machine the week that
Speaker 4: we lost Lee Ilia.
Speaker 1: He passed away a couple of days ago.
Speaker 4: Here is Lee Elia, then, the Chicago Cup manager, nineteen
Speaker 4: eighty three, with the single greatest rant of all time.
Speaker 4: This is why Lee Ilia is the goat of the
Speaker 4: media meltdown.
Speaker 8: I'll tell you one fucking thing. I hope we get
Speaker 8: fucking hotter and shit, just to stuff it up them
Speaker 8: three thousand fucking people that show up every fucking day,
Speaker 8: because if they're the real Chicago fucking fans, they can
Speaker 8: kiss my fucking ass right downtown and try it. They're
Speaker 8: really really behind you around here, my fucking head, What
Speaker 8: am I supposed to do? Go out there and let
Speaker 8: my fucking players get destroyed every day and be quiet
Speaker 8: about it. For the fucking nickel dyin people to show up.
Speaker 8: The motherfuckers don't even work. That's why they're out at
Speaker 8: the fucking game. They only go out and get a
Speaker 8: fucking job and find out what it's like to go
Speaker 8: out there and are fucking living. Eighty five percent of
Speaker 8: the fucking world work it. The other fifteen come out
Speaker 8: here the fucking playground for the cocksuckers. Motherfuckers, cocksuckers like
Speaker 8: the fucking players. God guys bussing their fucking hands, and
Speaker 8: these fucking people do. And that's the come my fucking ad.
Speaker 8: They talk about the great fucking support that the players
Speaker 8: get around here. I haven't seen it this fucking hair.
Speaker 8: The name of the game is hit the ball, catch
Speaker 8: the ball, and get the fucking job done. Right now, Well,
Speaker 8: we have more laws than we have wins. The fucking
Speaker 8: changes that have happened in the Cup organization are multipoles,
Speaker 8: all right. They don't show because we're five and fourteen,
Speaker 8: And unfortunately that's the criteria of them. Some fifteen motherfucking
Speaker 8: percent that come out to day baseball. The other eighty
Speaker 8: five percent are earning a living. It'll take more than
Speaker 8: a five and thirteen or five and fourteen to destroy
Speaker 8: the makeup of this club. I guarantee you that there's
Speaker 8: some fucking pros out there that want to fucking play
Speaker 8: this game, but you're stuck in a fucking stigma. The
Speaker 8: fucking Dodgers and the Phillies and the Cardinals and all
Speaker 8: that sheep shit. These mother fucking editorials about say and
Speaker 8: fucking the phillyitis and all that shit. That's sickening. It's unbelievable,
Speaker 8: it really is. It's a disheartening fucking situation we're in
Speaker 8: right now. Five and fourteen doesn't gate all that work.
Speaker 8: Put me three fucking games left. I'm trying to say it.
Speaker 8: Don't rip them fucking guys out there, rip me. Do
Speaker 8: you want to rip somebody, rip my fucking ad, But
Speaker 8: don't rip them fucking guys because they're killing everything they
Speaker 8: can give. Once we hit that fucking groove, it'll flow,
Speaker 8: and it will flow. The talent's there. I don't know
Speaker 8: how to make it any clearancey. I'm frustrated. I'll guarantee
Speaker 8: I'm frustrated. It'd be different if I walked in this
Speaker 8: room every day at eight thirty and saw a bunch
Speaker 8: of guys they didn't give a shit. They give a
Speaker 8: shit and It's a tough natural ad a tough National
Speaker 8: League period.
Speaker 1: All right.
Speaker 4: So there it is Lee Ilia, the classic meltdown. Poh
Speaker 4: rest in peace, Lee Ilia. A couple of notes on that.
Speaker 4: I actually ran into Lee Ilia years ago. The Dodgers
Speaker 4: hired him as a advisor consultant. Ned Kaletti was the
Speaker 4: general manager of the Dodgers, and I saw Lee he lived.
Speaker 4: I think he lived in Atlanta at the time. He
Speaker 4: lived on the East Coast somewhere. However, he occasionally would
Speaker 4: show up to Dodger Stadium, and many people who are
Speaker 4: my buddies in the media knew that I love that sound.
Speaker 4: That's the greatest sund You're not liked that, and they
Speaker 4: would say, hey, there's Lee Ilia. So I saw him
Speaker 4: in the immediate dining room there at Dodger Stadium. I
Speaker 4: also met the Les Grobstein, he also lost Less, Les Grobstein,
Speaker 4: who was the Chicago radio man that recorded that I
Speaker 4: ran into Less. Actually in Indianapolis. I was there for
Speaker 4: a basketball game. Les was there as well, and he
Speaker 4: told me the story. I was introduced to him.
Speaker 1: And I was introduced to him as.
Speaker 4: The guy that got the audio recorded the audio. There's
Speaker 4: two radio legends that recorded Meltdown's Paul Olden, who's now
Speaker 4: the voice of Yankee Stadium, the public address announcer. He
Speaker 4: recorded Losorta, Kingson's performance and all that, and so that
Speaker 4: was that was one of the greats. And I was
Speaker 4: gonna include Tommy in this, and I was like, there's
Speaker 4: like a different sub category for Tommy. My favorite Losorta
Speaker 4: rant is Kurt Bavoqua. That is to me the great
Speaker 4: in fact, you know what, I know we're talking about, Leah,
Speaker 4: I want to why don't we.
Speaker 1: Play that right here?
Speaker 4: The Dodgers had a picture named Tom Needenfeer who had
Speaker 4: been fined for throwing at one of the San Diego
Speaker 4: Padres players. That led to Kurt Bavoqua tell the media.
Speaker 4: He told the sports writers that the person that should
Speaker 4: have been fined was the manager, the fat little Italian, well,
Speaker 4: Tommy Lesorta, who was the apparently the fat little Italian
Speaker 4: that Kurt Levaka was talking about. He was asked about
Speaker 4: that the following day, and that led to what is
Speaker 4: the greatest rant by Tommy desaur is not the Kingman.
Speaker 4: It's Tommy reacting and getting worked up into a ladder
Speaker 4: because Kurt Bovaqua, who was a player for the Padres
Speaker 4: at the time, called him a fat little Italian and
Speaker 4: the writer said, what do you think about that? And
Speaker 4: that led to this, let's take a listen.
Speaker 14: I have never, ever since I had managed, ever told
Speaker 14: the picture to throw it anybody, nor will I ever
Speaker 14: And if I ever did, I certainly wouldn't make him
Speaker 14: throw at a fucking one hundred and thirty hitter like
Speaker 14: Lefe or fucking Bovaqua, who could hit water if he
Speaker 14: fell out of a fucking boat.
Speaker 5: And I guarant fucking te you this.
Speaker 14: When I pitched and I was going to pitch against
Speaker 14: a fucking team that had guys on it like the Baqua,
Speaker 14: I sent a fucking limousine to get the cocksucker to
Speaker 14: make sure he was in the motherfucking lineup because I
Speaker 14: kicked that cocksucker's add any fucking day a week is
Speaker 14: a fucking motherfucking big mouth. I'll tell you that.
Speaker 4: Uh alright, there's Tommy Lasorda the SORTA late edition, but
Speaker 4: lee Ilia is still number one.
Speaker 1: You can put the Sorta number two if you want.
Speaker 4: Bad job by me, But there's a different subcategory with
Speaker 4: the Sorda ants So there it is, Big Ben's Big Board,
Speaker 4: the greatest coaching meltdowns in US sports history. And again,
Speaker 4: if we missed one, hit me up, let me hear
Speaker 4: you until next time and we'll have new podcasts all weekend.
Speaker 4: Enjoy the rest of your day today and we got
Speaker 4: you covered with Danny G and Me all weekend long later.
Speaker 1: Skater, kiss my asta pasta, got a murder.
Speaker 8: I gotta go.