WEBVTT - Who Should Get Spanked? 0:00:05.200 --> 0:00:07.560 What's up. It's a sauce on the side, and we 0:00:07.680 --> 0:00:09.440 just have to start this podcast over because there have 0:00:09.440 --> 0:00:12.080 been too many distractions. We have people walking in and 0:00:12.080 --> 0:00:14.600 out of the studio, we have people waving outside the door. 0:00:16.680 --> 0:00:18.920 It's stressful. I will say this a million times. I 0:00:19.000 --> 0:00:22.560 understand why they have signs at the zoo that say 0:00:22.600 --> 0:00:24.720 do not tap on glass. They should have signs at 0:00:24.720 --> 0:00:26.840 the zoo that say don't stare too long, you creep, 0:00:27.080 --> 0:00:28.840 because you know how weird it feels to just get 0:00:28.840 --> 0:00:30.320 stared out from outside this glass. 0:00:30.520 --> 0:00:31.360 It is very weird. 0:00:31.440 --> 0:00:33.720 It's strange. I get why those gorillas are like flinging 0:00:33.760 --> 0:00:36.040 poop and stuff at people. Oh absolutely. 0:00:36.240 --> 0:00:38.360 I just hate the fact that it's always the kids 0:00:38.360 --> 0:00:41.120 that they fling poop at and they slam on the windows, 0:00:41.120 --> 0:00:42.760 and I'm like, poor kid, get the parent. 0:00:44.159 --> 0:00:47.919 This parent is atrocious. Yeah, anyway, we're breaking up the episodes. 0:00:47.920 --> 0:00:49.479 We've had a lot of guests lately and I love it. 0:00:49.479 --> 0:00:51.120 We're gonna have a guest probably next week in the 0:00:51.120 --> 0:00:55.080 week after. But people demand you and Andrew on the show, 0:00:55.160 --> 0:00:58.160 and I love that. So I've left Andrew out good 0:00:58.200 --> 0:01:01.520 and brought you because a lot to discuss. I love 0:01:01.560 --> 0:01:05.920 it you brought up something earlier, because today is the day. 0:01:05.959 --> 0:01:07.560 By the time you hear this, we'll have an answer. 0:01:07.640 --> 0:01:10.720 If you don't hear this, we have an answer that 0:01:10.800 --> 0:01:13.959 three I Atlas. Media is supposed to have made its past, 0:01:14.080 --> 0:01:16.360 and it's billions of years old. They're saying the way 0:01:16.360 --> 0:01:18.400 that it moves the tail, all kinds of stuff. It 0:01:18.480 --> 0:01:23.000 is not natural. It is something with a life that 0:01:23.080 --> 0:01:27.200 we don't understand. And I say, please, please take me. 0:01:27.760 --> 0:01:31.560 You say no, no, And I don't believe it. I 0:01:31.600 --> 0:01:35.440 think that we're doing ourselves a disservice by thinking that 0:01:35.520 --> 0:01:38.759 aliens that we're smart enough to keep up with aliens. 0:01:38.920 --> 0:01:40.319 Now I know we're not. That's why I'm like, please 0:01:40.319 --> 0:01:41.200 take me. I'm tired of this. 0:01:41.360 --> 0:01:44.560 So as ghetto, I think that if they do decide 0:01:44.560 --> 0:01:47.920 to come to the ghetto, it's gonna be the like, 0:01:47.960 --> 0:01:50.160 we're never gonna see it coming. We're not gonna know 0:01:50.240 --> 0:01:52.520 anything about it. No one is going to be able 0:01:52.520 --> 0:01:55.800 to put clues together and like have us anticipating something 0:01:56.160 --> 0:01:57.520 done nothing I. 0:01:57.440 --> 0:02:01.600 Get, I guarantee, she says, having zero knowledge whatsoever. But 0:02:01.880 --> 0:02:04.880 I believe that whatever is out there is so much 0:02:04.880 --> 0:02:08.560 smarter and stronger and more technologically advanced than us. If 0:02:08.560 --> 0:02:10.760 they have gotten to us and we've never gotten to them, 0:02:11.080 --> 0:02:13.560 they're already running laps around us. 0:02:13.639 --> 0:02:14.320 Yeah, for sure. 0:02:14.600 --> 0:02:18.400 I like to think that kindness and empathy are signs 0:02:18.400 --> 0:02:20.520 of intelligence. When you have an open mind, you say, hey, 0:02:20.600 --> 0:02:22.480 let me take a look at this, and not just 0:02:22.760 --> 0:02:25.280 stomp on the ant hill. You know, Like I think 0:02:25.280 --> 0:02:27.560 a smarter, more enlightened person is going to say, hey, 0:02:27.760 --> 0:02:30.640 there's a whole society over there. I Am not going 0:02:30.680 --> 0:02:32.320 to just stomp on it, but like you know, a 0:02:32.320 --> 0:02:34.200 little kid's gonna go over and do all kinds of 0:02:34.200 --> 0:02:36.560 crazy stuff to an ant hill. I think if the 0:02:36.560 --> 0:02:39.080 aliens make it to us, they're not of that mindset 0:02:39.600 --> 0:02:42.440 unless we are what I think we are, which is 0:02:42.440 --> 0:02:45.680 a virus that's just spreading and killing the earth. And 0:02:45.720 --> 0:02:48.400 then they're like, you know what, enough of you, you 0:02:48.520 --> 0:02:50.320 people have done bad things. You're out. 0:02:50.680 --> 0:02:52.919 I've never thought of us would being a virus? 0:02:53.280 --> 0:02:55.680 Have you seen what we do the planet? Well? Yeah, 0:02:55.760 --> 0:02:58.639 but like also kill it and multiply. 0:03:00.000 --> 0:03:02.440 So that means that there are some good viruses out there, 0:03:02.480 --> 0:03:05.160 because there are some good people a part of a society. 0:03:05.600 --> 0:03:08.680 I mean, I don't know about that, and like humans 0:03:08.720 --> 0:03:11.280 spread like a virus and act like a virus, which 0:03:11.320 --> 0:03:14.639 I think most people don't want to have a virus. Sure, 0:03:14.720 --> 0:03:16.440 I mean there are some good cells out there, but 0:03:16.480 --> 0:03:18.280 I'm not talking about it that way. I think that 0:03:18.840 --> 0:03:21.200 we are a virus on this earth. I mean, we've 0:03:21.200 --> 0:03:22.800 talked about this before, but if you ever watched the 0:03:22.800 --> 0:03:27.280 show called After Humans everything regenerates. The one thing that 0:03:27.360 --> 0:03:30.320 keeps the earth in bad positions, in a bad place 0:03:30.480 --> 0:03:34.680 and climate change happening all the time is us human 0:03:34.720 --> 0:03:36.640 beings and the things that we've created and how we 0:03:37.040 --> 0:03:39.960 then implement them. It's pretty terrible. I mean we saw 0:03:40.040 --> 0:03:42.040 during COVID when you take humans out of the mix, 0:03:42.240 --> 0:03:45.480 the animals started coming back. The waterways of Venice were 0:03:45.480 --> 0:03:47.360 clear enough and clean enough to have dolphins. 0:03:47.440 --> 0:03:49.080 Like, yeah, WHOA, all. 0:03:49.000 --> 0:03:50.160 You to do is take us out of the mix. 0:03:50.160 --> 0:03:53.760 I'm just saying, I want to see those aliens come 0:03:53.760 --> 0:03:57.760 here and to your point, spank people. Yeah, so I 0:03:57.880 --> 0:04:01.000 ask you, Diamond, you actually asked me, but I'm gonna 0:04:01.000 --> 0:04:03.160 throw it back at you. Who in the building would 0:04:03.160 --> 0:04:05.120 you like to get spanked by aliens? 0:04:06.200 --> 0:04:10.600 Well, okay, I have two answers. Okay, Andrew for sure. 0:04:10.600 --> 0:04:11.920 Because like the noise he would make. 0:04:12.240 --> 0:04:14.480 Yeah, And I just would love to see him in pain, 0:04:14.680 --> 0:04:22.640 you know. And now that I'm thinking, I kind of 0:04:22.680 --> 0:04:29.200 want to see Eric Wellman get spanked. Why just because 0:04:29.279 --> 0:04:31.320 he's like a big guy and I would love to 0:04:31.320 --> 0:04:34.320 see him being dominated. Okay, you know all right? 0:04:34.360 --> 0:04:36.479 And it would be funny, you know what I would 0:04:36.520 --> 0:04:39.240 like to do. What I would like to take our 0:04:39.720 --> 0:04:45.000 lovely like maintenance staff, Karen and Kiki and Hector, and 0:04:45.040 --> 0:04:47.039 I would love to put the paddle in their hands 0:04:47.360 --> 0:04:50.000 and be like, you've seen what goes around here, and 0:04:50.120 --> 0:04:53.640 you guys understand who is and isn't respectful and just 0:04:53.640 --> 0:04:57.440 like a decent human rain terror Oh, I would love 0:04:57.520 --> 0:04:58.040 to see that. 0:04:58.400 --> 0:05:00.920 Well, if that's the case, I you know one person, 0:05:01.680 --> 0:05:03.520 the person who blows the bathroom up every. 0:05:03.400 --> 0:05:05.200 Day, and you've identified who that I know. 0:05:05.200 --> 0:05:07.840 Exactly who you are, you little torp. 0:05:08.839 --> 0:05:10.280 Would you like to see that person get spanks? 0:05:10.360 --> 0:05:13.040 Or I'm back there and I want the spank where 0:05:13.080 --> 0:05:17.000 it's like you know you did. I want that. I 0:05:17.000 --> 0:05:18.520 want that absolutely. 0:05:19.279 --> 0:05:21.359 I've never met someone who wants to have kids just 0:05:21.400 --> 0:05:22.680 to discipline them like you. 0:05:22.839 --> 0:05:25.080 You know just a little, and I can't wait to say, 0:05:25.320 --> 0:05:28.039 you know, what used to happen to me? This is 0:05:28.200 --> 0:05:30.800 light and I didn't even really get spank so like 0:05:30.880 --> 0:05:33.119 to talk about this what happened to you? It's okay? 0:05:34.080 --> 0:05:36.440 Could you know you could parents lie to their kids 0:05:36.480 --> 0:05:38.800 all the time. I'd love to do that. Back in 0:05:38.880 --> 0:05:42.240 my day, I used to walk up hills both ways. 0:05:42.880 --> 0:05:45.279 That's crazy, let me tell you. I never thought hills 0:05:45.279 --> 0:05:47.120 both ways was a thing until I went to Portugal 0:05:47.160 --> 0:05:49.040 and I was like, shit, there are hills everywhere. Really, 0:05:49.240 --> 0:05:51.640 Oh my god, house is even possible. Every turn I 0:05:51.680 --> 0:05:53.880 take there's another hill and they all go up. I 0:05:53.880 --> 0:05:56.520 don't understand the kiddings of it. It was a great place. 0:05:56.560 --> 0:05:58.560 I'd love to live there, and everyone's probably really healthy. 0:05:58.880 --> 0:06:03.359 Really we walked. Everybody is awesome. So another thing that 0:06:03.400 --> 0:06:06.200 I wanted to mention real quickly. The podcast team has 0:06:06.240 --> 0:06:08.520 been on it and done some really cool stuff. So 0:06:08.560 --> 0:06:10.800 now we're gonna have promos running that you haven't heard before. 0:06:10.800 --> 0:06:14.120 If you listen to the Big Show. The Instagram page 0:06:14.160 --> 0:06:17.240 that is now up God Sauce on the side, come 0:06:17.240 --> 0:06:20.039 and follow. I don't know how we got that handle 0:06:20.080 --> 0:06:21.960 because I'm pretty sure we looked it up before and 0:06:22.000 --> 0:06:24.000 it was not available, but now it is and we 0:06:24.080 --> 0:06:27.400 have it, so that's exciting. So come follow We're gonna 0:06:27.400 --> 0:06:30.320 post little clips from the show, longer clips from the show. 0:06:30.440 --> 0:06:32.440 Anything you want. You can communicate with us over there, 0:06:32.800 --> 0:06:34.000 ask us questions. 0:06:33.720 --> 0:06:34.640 Tell us topics. 0:06:34.839 --> 0:06:37.600 Yeah, like anything you want. We're gonna handle all that 0:06:37.640 --> 0:06:39.560 at the Instagram page at sauce on the side. So 0:06:39.600 --> 0:06:40.960 thank you to everyone who helps set it up, and 0:06:40.960 --> 0:06:41.839 thank you for following. 0:06:42.480 --> 0:06:45.919 Please follow up, Yeah I do. 0:06:46.279 --> 0:06:50.560 I'm like, I am going to beg please. But Diamond 0:06:50.640 --> 0:06:52.200 has some things on her mind. We need to talk 0:06:52.240 --> 0:06:57.200 about you at the Sabrina Carpenter concerts. You have a 0:06:57.279 --> 0:06:58.080 lot of big thoughts. 0:06:58.320 --> 0:07:00.800 I had a lot of thoughts. But also let me 0:07:00.839 --> 0:07:03.159 preface this by saying that I had to tell the 0:07:03.200 --> 0:07:06.520 person that I was with, I will embarrass you tonight. Why. 0:07:06.640 --> 0:07:12.280 Like I looked at Kara, our music director. Yeah, she 0:07:14.240 --> 0:07:17.800 is not easily embarrassed. But when I'm like flying off 0:07:17.840 --> 0:07:20.160 the handles and doing something outrageous, She's like one of 0:07:20.160 --> 0:07:22.440 the first people that's like, calm it down, were you. 0:07:22.400 --> 0:07:23.560 Doing your jitterbug dance? 0:07:23.640 --> 0:07:25.840 Because that wasn't all right, and you see how we 0:07:25.880 --> 0:07:30.360 get there. But kind of on theme, kind of on theme, Okay, 0:07:30.880 --> 0:07:33.360 I felt like I was at a taping of I 0:07:33.480 --> 0:07:38.080 Love Lucy, Like yeah, no, literally, her Serena Carpenter's stage 0:07:38.080 --> 0:07:43.280 setup is like a house where she's filming a show, okay, 0:07:43.280 --> 0:07:45.440 and so in the morning it's a daytime show and 0:07:45.480 --> 0:07:47.680 she's like not ready for it, so she's running around 0:07:47.920 --> 0:07:49.760 and then she comes back at night and it's like 0:07:49.800 --> 0:07:54.600 the after dark version and it's so good. Like I 0:07:54.640 --> 0:07:57.240 love Beyonce, but Beyonce just goes on the stage and 0:07:57.280 --> 0:07:59.760 perform songs the way that she wants to write. 0:08:00.080 --> 0:08:01.840 Oh what are you about to say? 0:08:01.960 --> 0:08:04.920 No? But Sabrina, it's an experience. It's a different type 0:08:04.920 --> 0:08:07.120 of experience where like I felt like I was in 0:08:07.160 --> 0:08:08.640 an audience for a show, and I. 0:08:08.600 --> 0:08:11.600 Love that that's exciting, like a theme. I love that 0:08:11.680 --> 0:08:13.840 a lot of little kids go to see Sabrina. 0:08:13.520 --> 0:08:16.680 Right like they love her and they shouldn't their parents 0:08:16.720 --> 0:08:20.160 soon spank them. If you took your kid to the 0:08:20.200 --> 0:08:26.120 Sabrina Carpenter concert, knowing what her lyrics say and you've 0:08:26.160 --> 0:08:30.600 seen her music videos, you deserve to get spanked, Like 0:08:31.320 --> 0:08:33.840 paddle to ask, what do people say belt to ask? 0:08:33.920 --> 0:08:37.560 You deserve it? This woman is like the amount of 0:08:37.960 --> 0:08:42.719 sexual references that I don't think are like undercover. It's 0:08:43.000 --> 0:08:44.640 like she's very blunt about everything. 0:08:44.679 --> 0:08:48.840 We bleep. Her song on the Air Tears, Oh yes, 0:08:48.920 --> 0:08:51.079 it's I mean, the lyric is something like you make 0:08:51.120 --> 0:08:52.520 me wet, tears run. 0:08:52.360 --> 0:08:55.800 Down down my guy, excuse me, ma'am, Like what, I 0:08:55.840 --> 0:08:56.720 don't think that's in nuendo. 0:08:56.760 --> 0:08:58.680 I'm pretty sure that's a right over the head. 0:08:58.800 --> 0:09:01.000 Then there's a song called good Graces, which is one 0:09:01.040 --> 0:09:03.960 of my favorites, but like, I'm an adult, so I 0:09:03.960 --> 0:09:05.920 don't think about it. But the lyrics are I don't 0:09:05.920 --> 0:09:08.360 give a fuck about you. I don't give a fuck, 0:09:08.480 --> 0:09:11.360 and like the kids, they're right next to me and 0:09:11.360 --> 0:09:13.439 I'm screaming it and I shouldn't feel bad. 0:09:13.559 --> 0:09:15.400 You shouldn't know you went to an adult thing. 0:09:15.640 --> 0:09:19.480 Like then she's doing sex positions everywhere. I mean, it's 0:09:19.480 --> 0:09:22.719 a very interesting show, but not for a kid. These 0:09:22.760 --> 0:09:25.480 little girls with cowboy hats. I'm like, okay, So. 0:09:25.480 --> 0:09:27.720 I get very torn about that. For a lot of reasons. 0:09:27.720 --> 0:09:30.120 My parents we've talked about this before, but they did 0:09:30.200 --> 0:09:31.800 not let me watch TV until I was like fifteen 0:09:31.880 --> 0:09:33.640 years old. If I want to watch things, I was 0:09:33.679 --> 0:09:35.400 like sneaking it at a friend's house or if they 0:09:35.400 --> 0:09:37.280 weren't home. I was trying to watch some stuff. But 0:09:37.320 --> 0:09:40.360 outside of that, they didn't let me watch anything. However, 0:09:41.520 --> 0:09:44.400 they never stopped me from listening to any type of music, 0:09:44.480 --> 0:09:46.319 and I mean any type of music. My mom heard 0:09:46.360 --> 0:09:50.440 me listening to Eminem's first album and was astounding. She said, 0:09:50.480 --> 0:09:51.240 what is happening? 0:09:51.880 --> 0:09:53.160 Is he killing someone? 0:09:53.520 --> 0:09:56.000 There's a child involved? What is this? And then she 0:09:56.080 --> 0:09:58.760 just walked right out like she was like okay, whatever. 0:09:58.800 --> 0:10:01.160 They didn't really we had in the way of music. 0:10:01.240 --> 0:10:04.240 I don't know why they didn't, and movies, Like I 0:10:04.320 --> 0:10:06.480 went to rated our movies with them all the time. 0:10:06.520 --> 0:10:08.200 They were the parents who probably would have taken me 0:10:08.440 --> 0:10:10.640 to Sabrina Carpenter's show. And then when I asked a 0:10:10.720 --> 0:10:13.880 question they would explain it. Oh oh yeah, I mean 0:10:13.960 --> 0:10:16.040 you asked my parents anything. They did not sugarcoat. They 0:10:16.080 --> 0:10:17.520 were like we talked about this on the air once, 0:10:17.840 --> 0:10:21.160 but they were like, hey, your fish is dead. What 0:10:21.400 --> 0:10:25.120 what happened? Yeah, your fish died. I was like okay, yeah. 0:10:25.160 --> 0:10:27.440 Other parents are like, oh, we're gonna sugarcoat this, not mine. 0:10:27.720 --> 0:10:31.600 They believe sugarcoating gives you cavities. They just tell you things. 0:10:31.640 --> 0:10:33.200 And then I got in trouble for telling other kids 0:10:33.280 --> 0:10:33.880 those things. 0:10:34.040 --> 0:10:35.120 Oh you were one of those. 0:10:36.040 --> 0:10:39.160 Uh, First of all, do you know what it's like 0:10:40.200 --> 0:10:43.560 knowing about Santa? Do you know what it's like knowing 0:10:43.600 --> 0:10:47.640 about Santa and being surrounded by people that's who don't 0:10:48.920 --> 0:10:50.080 what are you talking about? 0:10:50.120 --> 0:10:54.800 You know what? The gandhis jail probably six months federal penitentiary. 0:10:55.120 --> 0:10:57.040 Wait no, yeah, no, okay, wait. 0:10:56.960 --> 0:10:59.720 Let's back this up for one second. Lying to your 0:10:59.760 --> 0:11:03.200 kids about Santa is diabolical. It's crazy because you are 0:11:03.240 --> 0:11:06.480 setting them up for the biggest disappointment when they figure 0:11:06.520 --> 0:11:08.880 out that that thing is not real. Why would you 0:11:08.960 --> 0:11:10.760 just light to them right off the bat instead of 0:11:10.800 --> 0:11:13.080 and this is where my parents came at it, from 0:11:13.120 --> 0:11:15.640 telling them the truth about Santa, because you're going to 0:11:15.679 --> 0:11:18.000 behave for this mythological thing that's going to vanish when 0:11:18.000 --> 0:11:19.480 you're like eight. I don't know how old are kids 0:11:19.480 --> 0:11:22.040 when they find out, Oh my god, how old are they? 0:11:22.360 --> 0:11:23.080 I was ten? 0:11:23.920 --> 0:11:24.000 What? 0:11:24.400 --> 0:11:25.080 Yeah? I was ten? 0:11:25.280 --> 0:11:28.359 You were ten years old believing in Santa? Yeah, that's embarrassing. 0:11:28.520 --> 0:11:31.520 No, yes, I think that it lets your kid be 0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:33.920 a kid, like, okay, a kid. 0:11:33.679 --> 0:11:34.920 Without believing in Santa. 0:11:35.120 --> 0:11:37.760 And then when I realized that it was my parents' dad. 0:11:37.679 --> 0:11:40.360 Tell you the story about how I realized I'm fascinated. 0:11:40.720 --> 0:11:44.600 Asked for a drum kit or a drum set, and 0:11:44.880 --> 0:11:47.440 in the middle of the night on Christmas Eve, my 0:11:47.559 --> 0:11:49.880 dad was putting it together and he knocked the whole 0:11:49.880 --> 0:11:56.200 thing over. So it was just like, so I got 0:11:56.320 --> 0:11:58.880 up and I like snuck to the staircase and I 0:11:58.920 --> 0:12:01.360 could see him in mom like trying to put it together, 0:12:01.559 --> 0:12:03.600 and I just was I appreciated it. I was like, 0:12:03.679 --> 0:12:06.320 oh wow, but I had been asking for like a 0:12:06.400 --> 0:12:09.240 year or two before that, like is Santah really real? 0:12:09.280 --> 0:12:10.719 And my mom was like, well, do you believe that 0:12:10.760 --> 0:12:12.680 he's real. If you believe that, then he's real. 0:12:12.920 --> 0:12:16.640 Like I mean, is that not the case for really everything? Yeah, 0:12:16.679 --> 0:12:19.000 But like, I think it's weird that parents just set 0:12:19.000 --> 0:12:20.960 their kids up with this life for no reason. My 0:12:21.000 --> 0:12:24.040 mom was like, everyone's gonna do this whole like, you 0:12:24.080 --> 0:12:26.719 better be good because Sanna's watching. No, I want you 0:12:26.800 --> 0:12:28.160 to be good because I'm watching. 0:12:28.640 --> 0:12:30.960 And oh when it gives you. 0:12:30.400 --> 0:12:33.480 A Christmas gifts. Also, if you're gonna behave, behave for 0:12:33.559 --> 0:12:36.000 your father and me, not Santa. Please. 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:39.600 Santa was bringing me gifts regardless. I learned that very early. Okay, 0:12:39.920 --> 0:12:41.800 my teacher tried to tell on me. We went to 0:12:41.800 --> 0:12:44.560 see Santa when I was like in pre k, and 0:12:44.640 --> 0:12:48.040 the teacher was like, Diamond has not like Diamond is talkative, 0:12:48.080 --> 0:12:50.040 she's not quiet in class when I need her to 0:12:50.080 --> 0:12:55.079 be quiet. And the white Santa said, well, it looks 0:12:55.080 --> 0:12:58.600 like you're gonna get coal. And then I went to 0:12:58.600 --> 0:13:01.040 see the black Santa, and the teacher tried to do 0:13:01.080 --> 0:13:03.720 the same damn thing. You know what. He said, It's okay, 0:13:03.760 --> 0:13:06.280 you're gonna get it, don't worry about it. And I said, hey, 0:13:06.600 --> 0:13:10.760 I'm gonting regardless. I'm a yapper by nature. Babes, this isn't. 0:13:10.559 --> 0:13:13.959 Gonna stop distrust. The white men began, uh oh, I 0:13:13.960 --> 0:13:18.960 don't know. Maybe it goes back to Santa. My sister. Apparently, 0:13:18.960 --> 0:13:21.120 my parents did try with my sister, but she figured 0:13:21.160 --> 0:13:23.280 it out like very young. What they said, she was 0:13:23.320 --> 0:13:26.520 like a baby baby, like barely talking. And she made 0:13:26.559 --> 0:13:28.920 a comment that my mom used the same wrapping paper 0:13:28.920 --> 0:13:31.400 as Santa and that was weird. Oh and my mom 0:13:31.480 --> 0:13:32.280 was like, ah shit. 0:13:32.559 --> 0:13:35.920 Oh stop, but that's so cute. See, okay, you can't 0:13:36.000 --> 0:13:39.480 like if your kid asks or figures it out, then 0:13:39.520 --> 0:13:43.000 it's like okay whatever. But like I know a parent 0:13:43.040 --> 0:13:46.160 who shut it down and was like, no, there is 0:13:46.160 --> 0:13:46.720 no Santa. 0:13:46.880 --> 0:13:49.719 I'm like, come on, don't do that. I wouldn't at 0:13:49.720 --> 0:13:51.360 this at this age. I would not do that to 0:13:51.400 --> 0:13:54.040 someone else's kid. But when you're a kid and you're like. 0:13:54.000 --> 0:13:55.839 I know something that's messed up. 0:13:55.960 --> 0:13:58.480 I know this thing and I can prove it, and 0:13:58.640 --> 0:14:02.160 you're all your dumb little friends running around talking about Santa. 0:14:01.559 --> 0:14:03.800 My idiots ridiculous. 0:14:03.840 --> 0:14:07.760 You know what, kids like you deserve to get tripped somebody. 0:14:09.520 --> 0:14:13.280 You were the tripper. You're ruining Santa dreams and you're 0:14:13.320 --> 0:14:15.839 tripping these damn kids jail. 0:14:15.920 --> 0:14:17.480 Let me tell you this, when you're a little person, 0:14:17.720 --> 0:14:19.600 you have to be resourceful. You think I can like 0:14:19.920 --> 0:14:23.200 take people hand to hand combat. No, most people are 0:14:23.200 --> 0:14:26.720 ten times my size. That was dramatic. Three times my 0:14:26.800 --> 0:14:29.800 size not gonna work for me ANYW. 0:14:31.680 --> 0:14:34.680 I digress trying to figure out where your villain story 0:14:34.760 --> 0:14:35.640 actually starts. 0:14:35.720 --> 0:14:36.400 I'm not a villain. 0:14:37.280 --> 0:14:39.640 What is it your origin story? Where did it start? 0:14:40.120 --> 0:14:43.080 Because if you were people when you were a kid, exactly, 0:14:43.600 --> 0:14:44.200 you're unwell. 0:14:44.840 --> 0:14:46.880 My dad told this story when he was on the podcast. 0:14:47.040 --> 0:14:48.280 There's a kid that used to pick on me in 0:14:48.280 --> 0:14:50.800 our old neighborhood and I threw banana peels at him 0:14:51.400 --> 0:14:53.480 and he fell and hurt himself. And guess what, he 0:14:53.480 --> 0:14:54.800 did not pick on me anymore after that. 0:14:54.960 --> 0:14:56.400 But it started before that. 0:14:56.560 --> 0:15:00.600 It had to it might have my origin story. So 0:15:01.200 --> 0:15:03.240 I wanted to mention something that I think is the 0:15:03.320 --> 0:15:06.080 funniest story that we'll probably never talk about on the air. 0:15:06.120 --> 0:15:08.680 Like fully, I sort of alluded to it, but I 0:15:08.720 --> 0:15:16.040 did this speaking panel. On the speaking panel were four people. 0:15:16.200 --> 0:15:19.080 It was me, funk Master Flex, who is like a 0:15:19.160 --> 0:15:21.160 very popular DJ here in New York. If you don't know. 0:15:21.120 --> 0:15:24.680 Who he is, he terrorized New Yorkers for thirty years. 0:15:24.800 --> 0:15:27.240 Okay, that in Diamond is a New Yorker for thirty years, 0:15:27.280 --> 0:15:29.920 so she has full awareness of this. A guy named 0:15:29.920 --> 0:15:33.680 Noah Eagle who is a sports commentator, and a guy 0:15:33.760 --> 0:15:37.720 named Chavoy from The Chaboys. The Cha Boys Show, I 0:15:37.760 --> 0:15:40.120 believe is what it's called. And the four of us 0:15:40.120 --> 0:15:42.600 are up there in front of all these people at 0:15:42.640 --> 0:15:46.160 this advertising agency and we are talking about serious business, 0:15:47.160 --> 0:15:49.480 not that serious, but they were, you know, talking about 0:15:49.480 --> 0:15:52.040 like influencer culture and how does this impact you guys, 0:15:52.080 --> 0:15:54.560 and how do you pick clients and blah blah. It 0:15:54.600 --> 0:15:57.440 was great, everything was going fine. But our man flex 0:15:57.840 --> 0:16:02.680 not once, but twice, possibly three times, needed them to 0:16:02.720 --> 0:16:06.440 repeat the question and then blamed me for him not 0:16:06.920 --> 0:16:08.040 knowing what the question was. 0:16:08.200 --> 0:16:09.840 Yeah, why did? Why would I blame you? 0:16:10.000 --> 0:16:12.840 I'm sorry, she's distracting me. I was like, from what 0:16:12.840 --> 0:16:15.480 what is happening right here? And I couldn't tell if 0:16:15.480 --> 0:16:17.400 it was like him trying to be like cute and flirty, like, oh, 0:16:17.440 --> 0:16:19.840 I'm distracted, or if he was genuinely like this bitch 0:16:19.880 --> 0:16:22.160 is talking too much. I don't know. My answers were short, 0:16:23.160 --> 0:16:25.720 they were short and sweet, you know me. I don't 0:16:25.720 --> 0:16:27.560 want to overtalk it on these things. I just want 0:16:27.600 --> 0:16:29.840 to deliver the information. So I get blamed twice for 0:16:29.920 --> 0:16:31.920 him not knowing what the question is. Now fast forward 0:16:32.000 --> 0:16:34.080 to the end. We know the order in which we're 0:16:34.080 --> 0:16:36.560 answering the questions, So they ask a question, I answer. 0:16:36.640 --> 0:16:39.120 He's up next. He answers. Then he's done, right, he 0:16:39.160 --> 0:16:41.280 doesn't have to pay attention to the rest because he's done. 0:16:41.520 --> 0:16:41.840 Yeah. 0:16:42.360 --> 0:16:48.120 This man pulled out his phone, opened up Instagram. I 0:16:48.160 --> 0:16:52.320 am not joking. Started watching reels with the volume on 0:16:52.600 --> 0:16:56.600 that's sick, the volume on Diamond. He was on the panel. 0:16:57.480 --> 0:16:59.440 What were the reels? Could you make out what was 0:16:59.480 --> 0:16:59.880 being said? 0:17:00.320 --> 0:17:02.640 No, because I look, I know it was like a 0:17:02.720 --> 0:17:04.960 light skinned guy talking, maybe a white guy, maybe a 0:17:04.960 --> 0:17:07.040 spinna guy. I don't know. But I looked at him 0:17:07.040 --> 0:17:09.760 and I was like, for real, are you serious right now? 0:17:09.760 --> 0:17:11.919 And he goes oh and put it away and then 0:17:11.960 --> 0:17:14.600 did it immediately after again. He did it twice. I 0:17:14.800 --> 0:17:18.040 was dying inside because I thought it was so funny 0:17:18.680 --> 0:17:20.960 and insane all at the same time that I was like, 0:17:20.960 --> 0:17:24.159 I just I can't wrap my head around what the 0:17:24.280 --> 0:17:26.320 necessity would be, like if it was a text message 0:17:26.359 --> 0:17:28.119 or something that had been going off repeatedly and you 0:17:28.160 --> 0:17:30.680 were like, oh, my phone has been going off non stop, 0:17:30.760 --> 0:17:35.080 let me check. That's one thing. But reels with the volume. 0:17:34.720 --> 0:17:37.720 On the man is unwell twice the man is unwell, 0:17:37.960 --> 0:17:38.640 And like, I. 0:17:38.560 --> 0:17:41.320 Loved everything about it. It's crazy, but I loved it. 0:17:41.320 --> 0:17:42.720 It could be in a good way or it could 0:17:42.720 --> 0:17:46.480 be in a bad way, like he would premiere songs 0:17:47.480 --> 0:17:49.880 but talk over the songs and so. 0:17:50.119 --> 0:17:52.720 Like, okay, so this is like lifelong yes. 0:17:53.280 --> 0:17:56.280 And you know, like we what back in quote unquote 0:17:56.359 --> 0:17:59.240 back in my day, we couldn't like download this something. 0:17:59.280 --> 0:18:01.879 We had to literally listen to them premiere on the 0:18:02.000 --> 0:18:07.920 radio and he would start the song, drop bombs and 0:18:08.080 --> 0:18:11.080 talk over it, start it over. I don't know how 0:18:11.080 --> 0:18:14.040 many times do you remember when jay Z and Kanye 0:18:14.160 --> 0:18:19.320 dropped otis Yes, And there's like viral footage, not even footage, 0:18:19.320 --> 0:18:22.760 because it's just audio of him playing the song for 0:18:22.800 --> 0:18:25.000 the first time, and he kept starting it over and 0:18:25.040 --> 0:18:28.719 he goes, I want you to go into your local 0:18:28.800 --> 0:18:32.840 corner store right now, stick your hand behind the cash register. 0:18:33.400 --> 0:18:37.320 And it's just like, what, why can we just hear 0:18:37.359 --> 0:18:37.800 the song? 0:18:38.440 --> 0:18:41.960 Yeah, as the song's premiering, he's encouraging you to rob. 0:18:41.920 --> 0:18:43.880