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Speaker 1: Are you leave in I you wanna way back home?

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Speaker 2: Either way, we want to be there.

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Speaker 3: Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim and give us

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Speaker 3: time and a termino and gaye ad.

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Speaker 2: We want to.

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Speaker 4: Send you off in style.

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Speaker 1: You wanna welcome you back home?

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Speaker 2: Tell us all about it.

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Speaker 4: We scared her?

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Speaker 1: Was it fine?

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Speaker 4: Malborn? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

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Speaker 4: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

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Speaker 3: Do you need to ride?

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Speaker 4: Do you need do you ride to ride?

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Speaker 1: Do you need with Karen and Chris you're listening to

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Speaker 1: do you need a ride? This is Chris Fairbanks.

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Speaker 4: Chris, you did the ending speech at the beginning.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah. A lot of times we are at our

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Speaker 1: peak performance wise at the end of a podcast, so

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Speaker 1: I thought I would.

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Speaker 4: Just start it in the end.

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Speaker 1: Yes and no. This is another example of me not

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Speaker 1: admitting my mistakes. It is embarrassing.

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Speaker 4: I'm so sorry I embarrassed you and call.

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Speaker 1: How often do I say welcome to Do you need

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Speaker 1: to ride? This is Chris Fairbanks. It's been twelve years,

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Speaker 1: I believe, and they still don't know who you are. See.

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Speaker 1: I take the mirror when it's on me, and then

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Speaker 1: I shine it in someone else's face.

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Speaker 4: That's right.

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Speaker 1: Guess what, you're also a vampire.

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Speaker 4: Guess what, it's not just my mirror.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, two can look into this mirror, Dracula. But I

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Speaker 1: do welcome you all. We are in the car driving

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Speaker 1: on what most people would describe as a gloomy day.

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Speaker 1: I would disagree. This kind of weather puts a pep

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Speaker 1: in my step.

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Speaker 2: It is strange for it being middle of May to

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Speaker 2: have this San Francisco weather here in Los Angeles.

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Speaker 4: Yes, but I don't mind it.

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Speaker 2: I just started with an air conditioner on yesterday and

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Speaker 2: had to turn it off and then turn the heater

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Speaker 2: on today.

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Speaker 4: That's a bit of a Yeah, that's a lot.

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Speaker 1: I love the fickle weather, and I love knowing the

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Speaker 1: sun is not damaging my skin, which I've thanks to

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Speaker 1: you and focused on.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, not to mention my eyeballs because you're wearing sunglasses.

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Speaker 1: I never wear sunglasses, and now that I have prescription glasses,

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Speaker 1: I wear them even less than never. What that's the.

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Speaker 2: Prescription makes me wear my sunglasses all the indoors.

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Speaker 1: I gotta get some. I gotta get yet another pair

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Speaker 1: with tint. And I do not mean transitions good. The

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Speaker 1: moment in between a clear transistor transition lens and a

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Speaker 1: tinted one is a moment where you will scare me

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Speaker 1: if you walk in the room with your hazy purple tint.

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Speaker 2: It is that moment where Gary Ridgeway became the Green

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Speaker 2: River Killer. It is in that moment.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, on either end of the literal lens spectrum, he

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Speaker 5: would have been an upstanding citizen.

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Speaker 1: I did just watch about Larry. He is a scary,

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Speaker 1: scary person who Gary garynn Larry his brother. He had

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Speaker 1: two brothers named Larry. And the fact that all those

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Speaker 1: years he was on New Art, I mean killing.

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Speaker 4: People right in front of America.

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Speaker 1: It's two brothers named Darryl. I'm bad at improv, but

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Speaker 1: limprov is not not Yeah, started by Limpress lamp Limpressed.

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Speaker 1: I am just gonna get out here, goodbye.

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Speaker 4: I don't want to be.

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Speaker 1: Embarrassed in front of our guests. But today we're doing

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Speaker 1: two episodes. This first one is a solo. Even though

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Speaker 1: Karen and I are two different people, we do share

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Speaker 1: a mirror.

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Speaker 2: We're both looking at the same vampire mirror. Yes, we

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Speaker 2: have for quite some time.

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Speaker 1: And we never There's not a lot of visuals with

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Speaker 1: this podcast, but We always record in a two neck

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Speaker 1: hold sweater that we both wear.

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Speaker 2: Yep, we record cheek to cheek like many of the

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Speaker 2: famous can join twins.

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Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, sometimes only one of those twins will have

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Speaker 1: a music career and the other is just along for

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Speaker 1: the ride. I saw it on.

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Speaker 4: TV Matt Damon and Greg Canaar.

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Speaker 6: Uh.

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Speaker 1: Yes, it's Farelli Brothers or fairly if I want to

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Speaker 1: say it correctly. I New Year's Eve last year, my

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Speaker 1: buddy Doug and I did at the club in Austin.

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Speaker 2: And what's Doug's last name Mellard?

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Speaker 1: Close to the duck but not quite the same Doug

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Speaker 1: Mellard and I At the end of the show. Our

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Speaker 1: plan for New Year's Eve after the countdown was to

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Speaker 1: wear this two headed sweater together. That was the only

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Speaker 1: plan we really had. And the putting on of the

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Speaker 1: sweater made me lose track of time, and we started

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Speaker 1: the countdown a good one and a half minutes after midnight,

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Speaker 1: and the crowd really took it personally. Yeah, it ruined

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Speaker 1: everyone's So I'd like to apologize to that room full

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Speaker 1: of fiscal conservatives.

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Speaker 4: They don't accept your bullege.

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Speaker 1: They not. They want me to pull myself up by

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Speaker 1: my bootstraps.

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Speaker 4: They want to remind you that you had two jobs. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: and you didn't do one of them.

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Speaker 1: And it's okay to not have a job. But I

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Speaker 1: also didn't have the wherewithal to publicly become part owner

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Speaker 1: of Dell Computers, which is why their children were driving

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Speaker 1: Lamborghinis to the show. It the comedy club. I love

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Speaker 1: Cap City, It's my home club. I love everyone involved.

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Speaker 1: And it's just when I went there, I thought I

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Speaker 1: was going to Austin, and it is a outside portion

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Speaker 1: of Austin known as the Domain, which is very scary,

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Speaker 1: scary name, and that just it was a bunch. It

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Speaker 1: was a mall, an outdoor mall, like a giant grove

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Speaker 1: situation with parks in it, very expensive stores, surrounded by residents,

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Speaker 1: super nice condos and nightlife. There was like a strip

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Speaker 1: that was like you know New Orleans at night and

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Speaker 1: fancy cars with doors that go up the James Bondway,

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Speaker 1: and they were just partying and I was like, where

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Speaker 1: are all these people getting their money? And someone said

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Speaker 1: Dell Computers, and I didn't ask any questions.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, that's a full answer.

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Speaker 1: They were not employees. I do know that part of

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Speaker 1: the answer.

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Speaker 4: They were early stockholders.

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Speaker 1: I guess so, kind of like Tesla and these other

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Speaker 1: companies in the beginning they were publicly you could like

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Speaker 1: become part owner or the Green Bay Packers. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Can you imagine just being having a license franchise, just.

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Speaker 1: And being a part of the community, getting that cheese

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Speaker 1: right into your head, knowing that as you watch a game,

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Speaker 1: you're also one of the players. Oh, I wish I

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Speaker 1: could have sunk my teeth into one of those early investments.

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Speaker 2: My dad had early Apple stock, which I think was

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Speaker 2: the thing that kept him in a good mood throughout

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Speaker 2: the late eighties and nineties.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 4: But then in the market crash of two thousand and

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Speaker 4: was it six or seven?

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Speaker 1: I think eight and if they were talking housing, but.

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Speaker 2: Then everything else went, his stock crashed, And then I said,

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Speaker 2: oh my god, are you so upset?

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Speaker 4: And he goes, no, that's how it works.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And I said, thank god I got you for

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Speaker 2: a dad, and not some fucking psycho.

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Speaker 1: Right. My dad was real casual about his loss of many, many,

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Speaker 1: many many dollars. Dad's just it was that era.

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Speaker 3: Well, and if you have a good dad, they're smart

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Speaker 3: enough by that age to know that yes, we all

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Speaker 3: want security, but if you have it, if you have

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Speaker 3: enough financial security already, you don't need that extra shit.

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Speaker 2: You can lose it, and you can lose it, and

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Speaker 2: that's a chance for you to.

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Speaker 4: To be exactly like that. In that moment.

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Speaker 2: They may have been furious privately, right, but they demonstrated

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Speaker 2: like a leadership quality to us, which is, we're already fine.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I do not possess that I would lose it.

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Speaker 4: The gyms have it covered for us. We can do

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Speaker 4: what we want.

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Speaker 1: You would think I would have a piece of that,

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Speaker 1: with my mental name being James.

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Speaker 2: Well, you did already admit that you were wrong, and

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Speaker 2: you know take the hit on that.

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Speaker 4: That's a great Oh on our last viral clip, could.

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Speaker 1: We post it?

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Speaker 4: No, you just did it on this episode.

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Speaker 1: Our last viral clip. It went viral. As far as

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Speaker 1: I know, I was admitting how I was wrong in

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Speaker 1: that moment. Krit It was very fun I re listened

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Speaker 1: to it several times.

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Speaker 2: It's very funny. It sounded a little like Jimminy glick.

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Speaker 1: Yeah any time.

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Speaker 2: But I think it's so rare these days that a

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Speaker 2: straight white man can just say, oh, I'm sorry, I

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Speaker 2: did that wrong.

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Speaker 1: I'm learning, you're doing great. I'm learning. I don't know

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Speaker 1: that I was that way even a handful of years ago.

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Speaker 4: We didn't have to be right, But now I didn't.

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Speaker 1: Have to be right. I went and saw because it

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Speaker 1: was free ticket time. The One Netflix is a joke

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Speaker 1: festival event at the Hollywood Bowl. I watched Sebastian Maniscalco Seinfeld,

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Speaker 1: who didn't talk about politics.

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Speaker 4: And.

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Speaker 1: Jim Gaffigan and Nate Bergatzi went up first. They pulled

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Speaker 1: straws and Nate destroyed was got a standing ovation and

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Speaker 1: he is a comic that does not try at any

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Speaker 1: point to be funny, whereas everyone else. You could tell.

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Speaker 1: It's not the best. It's an outdoor venue. It was

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Speaker 1: a ton of people. You can't hear the laughs, I'm

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Speaker 1: sure because it's the sky. Is there one thing I

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Speaker 1: know about the sky being their laughs get sucked into

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Speaker 1: the clouds.

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Speaker 4: It doesn't like your material.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, And so they all were pushing it a little harder,

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Speaker 1: which is what I would have done. You know, you

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Speaker 1: cross your teeth, your eyes and cross your legs. You

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Speaker 1: cross your eyes and dot your legs, and I h Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Nate was so good, and I realized he does a

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Speaker 1: relatable admitting its flaws, but not in a I'm down

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Speaker 1: on myself way that I tend to lean into. He

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Speaker 1: does it a perfect balance, which makes him relatable to all. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Also, he was such a wild success hosting Saturday Night Live,

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Speaker 2: and I think that's probably one of the hardest things

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Speaker 2: people can do. And if you do it and you

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Speaker 2: kill it, I think there's very there are very few

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Speaker 2: gigs after that that are going to put that same

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Speaker 2: kind of nervousness into you. Right, and you have just

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Speaker 2: really way bigger muscles from more recent times.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Yeah, you can tell he's just got the juice.

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Speaker 2: He's just so good though. I mean, and he always

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Speaker 2: has been. It's like, that's the coolest thing. His comedy

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Speaker 2: is always Sorry, what if I started crying because I

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Speaker 2: loved Nate.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I just realized and I look and see

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Speaker 1: all these pictures of him on your dash.

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Speaker 2: And here in the glovebox there's a little shrine.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I did. I could tell, And it also was

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Speaker 1: inspiring for me, like I'm going to try that. He

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Speaker 1: did stand up in that venue and on SNL. Is

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Speaker 1: if it was just fifty people at a comedy club

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Speaker 1: in the beginning of his career. Yep, casual, no nervousness.

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Speaker 4: Yep, it's great, He's great.

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Speaker 1: That is my report on one of the more notable

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Speaker 1: things I've done in the time we've been apart.

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Speaker 4: Cool.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, congratulations.

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Speaker 1: It seems like I'm bragging. I went to a big,

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Speaker 1: fancy comedy.

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Speaker 2: Should I say, Well, let's see. Oh well, I went

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Speaker 2: and saw. I went to New York for my birthday.

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Speaker 2: Really I did. And I saw Cola Scola's play Oh Mary,

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Speaker 2: which is off Broadway now, but just recently it was

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Speaker 2: announced that it's moving to Broadway and it was really hilarious,

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Speaker 2: And we went there for the five o'clock show and

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Speaker 2: Jeff Tweety was in the audience, and a girl from

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Speaker 2: TikTok who is so funny, who does an impression of

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Speaker 2: her German mother, and her name is Laura, and I

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Speaker 2: can't remember her last name right now, but I spotted

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Speaker 2: her first and I was like, I need to say

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Speaker 2: hello to her, but then it was too nerdy and

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Speaker 2: so we just left there.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I always do that. Yeah, I'm a big fan.

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Speaker 1: You know what. People always appreciate it. I sure do

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Speaker 1: on the streets say hey, I like your stuff but

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Speaker 1: then leave, but go.

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Speaker 2: But also this felt it was very New York theater people,

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Speaker 2: so I was like, well.

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Speaker 1: How do you say Cole's last name esla at Scola.

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Speaker 1: I guess I've never said that out loud. But they

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Speaker 1: make me laugh very much.

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Speaker 2: They are the funniest but it's such an interesting, funny thing.

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Speaker 2: And I was so excited because no spoiler alerts. But

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Speaker 2: if you want to see this play and you don't

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Speaker 2: want to know anything about it, and don't listen for

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Speaker 2: the next ten seconds, I'm just going to say at

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Speaker 2: the end, they sing, and it is so they're such

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Speaker 2: a good singer and I believe have worked on Broadway

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Speaker 2: themselves a lot, from what I can tell, And it

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Speaker 2: just made me so happy because the rest of it

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Speaker 2: was just a regular play play right, So it was

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Speaker 2: a real tease till the very end.

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Speaker 4: God damn, they're a good singer.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, having that in your back pocket trained, Oh, I've

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Speaker 1: had an entire other life where I did this. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's a nice surprise.

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Speaker 2: It's a real because at the end of the day,

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Speaker 2: everybody loves it. Makes me think of when I was

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Speaker 2: in high school and we had a like a school

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Speaker 2: assembly and the people from the San Francisco Opera came

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Speaker 2: up to Petaluma to give us like a demonstration of

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Speaker 2: what they could do. And of course I was stoked

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Speaker 2: because I love all performing and I was like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: let's see this shit. But I was so scared because

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Speaker 2: it was like a school full of bullies and assholes,

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Speaker 2: and I.

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Speaker 4: Was like, they're not going to appreciate this.

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Speaker 2: And these fucking people rang that auditorium like a bell,

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Speaker 2: like it was mind blowing how loud they can sing

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Speaker 2: and how good it was, and just how inarguably talented

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Speaker 2: they were.

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Speaker 4: And everybody was like standing ovasion.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, all the bullies stopped arm wrestling to go.

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Speaker 4: I love the arts. I also need the.

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Speaker 1: Arts in my life. Right. It's so funny that we

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Speaker 1: had such different high school experiences because the only thing

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Speaker 1: I can compare that, to compare to that is the

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Speaker 1: Power Team coming to my They would flex their muscles

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Speaker 1: kind of for Christ, for God, and they would remind

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Speaker 1: you often and then they would rip apart. Was it

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Speaker 1: the Bible that doesn't seem the telephone book and just

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Speaker 1: do feats of strength while drunk for the Lord. And

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Speaker 1: they're still active today, are they? They just do tours

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Speaker 1: of high schools. I don't think you even have to

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Speaker 1: ask them to show up. There's no scheduling. They just arrive.

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Speaker 2: They hang around in high school parking lots and wait

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Speaker 2: for the call.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and so the same kind of crowd. Most of

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Speaker 1: the guys in my class, you know, used to fight

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Speaker 1: on the weekends, and so that just got them riled

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Speaker 1: up in a different way. They'd fight each other or

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Speaker 1: fight like oh strangers. It was a weird I just

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Speaker 1: was thinking about this last night. The nineties were a

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Speaker 1: very violent time, yes, but in a old timey. Hey,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna punch you because it's the weekend, and what

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Speaker 1: else are we're going to do. We're all driving around downtown.

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Speaker 4: Yes, we'll settle this outside energy with everything.

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Speaker 1: And it was, you know, it was just everyone had

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Speaker 1: rifles in their gun racks, but nothing nothing. No one

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Speaker 1: ever thought about that. It was just a different type

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Speaker 1: of violence.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, mono a mono.

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Speaker 1: Yes. See. I most fights I saw growing up, I

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Speaker 1: would be the only one crying in the audience. Sometimes

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Speaker 1: cars would be fanned out in the middle of the road,

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Speaker 1: ksey lamps and lights turned on, and I would watch

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Speaker 1: my friend punch someone in their twenties and get just

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Speaker 1: many scary memories and I would get emotional, but there

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Speaker 1: was always a handshake at the end, that old timey,

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Speaker 1: good decent, good game. It is something I appreciate now

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Speaker 1: but was just confused about. Then they're shaking hands.

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Speaker 4: Now, good game. Call nine one one. I agree. My

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Speaker 4: esophagus has collapsed.

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Speaker 1: Yes, it's it was just that that's not happening now,

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Speaker 1: and I suppose that's a good I.

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Speaker 4: Think it's for the better.

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Speaker 2: The same thing used to happen in both high school

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Speaker 2: with the people I went to high school with, and

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Speaker 2: of course in college. But by the time we were

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Speaker 2: all in college, we were really used to it. But

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Speaker 2: so the guys my sister hung out with, we'll get

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Speaker 2: in fights every weekend, like every night of the weekend.

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Speaker 2: And the girls that the the girlfriends of the guys

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Speaker 2: they were fighting, would stand next to like my sister

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Speaker 2: and be like stop Cody and like scream and shit,

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Speaker 2: and she'd be like, hey, sit down, this is gonna

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Speaker 2: take like four minutes. Relax, like I also need a

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Speaker 2: ride home.

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Speaker 1: Just calm down, and they if and four minutes is long,

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Speaker 1: yes it is.

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Speaker 4: With that with hands to the face wireless.

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Speaker 1: It was four minutes of constant back and forth. That

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Speaker 1: is two exhausted people. Yeah, there's a reason a round

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Speaker 1: of boxing is only three. Don't quote me on that,

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Speaker 1: but it's funny. I'm remembering now one of the early

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Speaker 1: when I recorded a few episodes in Montana on my

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Speaker 1: own a decade ago. I kind of drove around those

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Speaker 1: roads and I'm like, describe the scary fights and just

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Speaker 1: submitted it. And you probably never even.

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Speaker 4: No, I don't listen to this podcast.

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Speaker 1: I do. I've started to. I think it's pretty good,

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Speaker 1: is it. Yeah, we're good. We have a thing, certainly

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Speaker 1: a rapport, and you can tell we do our research that.

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Speaker 4: We really care.

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Speaker 1: At the end, I always say a non truth.

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Speaker 4: Just to throw it out there as a test.

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Speaker 1: Two truths and a lie. My favorite party game.

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Speaker 2: Here's what I don't like about me No, no, oh, sorry

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00:20:02,920 --> 00:20:07,479
Speaker 2: about drive time traffic. Yes, is the fucking stop and

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Speaker 2: go of those two right lanes. Like if you're over there,

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Speaker 2: this lane could be going full tilt. That lane can

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Speaker 2: be starting to go full tilt and then come to

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Speaker 2: a complete stop and the people behind you don't know right,

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Speaker 2: And then when you go to get out of that lane.

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Speaker 4: You're donning it toward a stopped car.

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Speaker 1: Yep.

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Speaker 4: Just want to remind everybody this is a real car ride.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and we will give you the details and hopefully

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Speaker 1: you pick up on some of the advice. If you're

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Speaker 1: in the far left lane, it is for the people

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Speaker 1: going fastest. If you aren't planning on going fast, get

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Speaker 1: out of it, get over, get over to the right.

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Speaker 4: Please get over yourself.

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Speaker 1: And speed up.

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Speaker 4: Ate Bargatzi, get over yourself.

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Speaker 1: Let me scoot up to your career.

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Speaker 4: Nate.

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Speaker 1: Remember that time in a van and we chewed kodiak together,

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Speaker 1: bonding over the fact that we didn't care about the

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Speaker 1: health of our lips. That's a true story.

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Speaker 4: It doesn't sound true, yeah, I.

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Speaker 1: Know, because it's so landish. It's like you can't even

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Speaker 1: write stuff like that because it's boring to talk about.

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Speaker 4: It's like a real la story.

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Speaker 1: I came here with nothing but some hopes and dreams

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Speaker 1: and a can of tobacco.

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Speaker 2: Making friends with chewing tobacco.

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Speaker 1: And I've quit that. I've quit making friends with that stuff.

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Speaker 4: Smart.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, what we're experiencing now is I believe in inversion.

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Speaker 1: We don't have to worry about weather today, which would

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Speaker 1: cause sound problems. I think how many podcasts have we

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Speaker 1: done in the rain.

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Speaker 4: It's only a handful.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well, those are the episodes you can fall asleep to,

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Speaker 1: really any of them? Look those up? I think there

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Speaker 1: are no Rain episodes.

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Speaker 2: Try to like do a crossover with like a sleep

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Speaker 2: app Oh yeah, fifty more. I don't know what the

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Speaker 2: fuck's going on. Yeah, yeah, calm would have been good. Okay,

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00:22:10,920 --> 00:22:12,960
Speaker 2: hold on, that's why I'm here. Take two mm hmm.

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Speaker 2: Those episodes you can find on the call map.

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00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:17,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, o, colab, we did.

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Speaker 4: Let me finish.

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Speaker 1: Sorry, those rain episodes we did?

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, those are available over on the call map

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Speaker 2: for three ninety nine apiece.

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Speaker 4: We have figured out how to monetize those.

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00:22:31,280 --> 00:22:33,240
Speaker 1: Oh you just wanted to brag about how we were

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Speaker 1: making money.

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Speaker 4: It wasn't even funny. Okay, take forth, I'll take it out.

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Speaker 1: And if you enjoy that's the pitter patter of rain.

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Speaker 4: Go over onto the call map.

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00:22:43,480 --> 00:22:45,760
Speaker 1: Yeah aggressively, yello screaming it.

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Speaker 4: Go to the comap.

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Speaker 1: Jug hold your breath for the punchline.

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Speaker 4: Did that's ah? The anti Bargazzi delivery system right.

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Speaker 2: There, blurting, unpredictable panic, clench it, shove it out of

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Speaker 2: your mouth.

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Speaker 4: When you first well not even just first started. I did.

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Speaker 2: This was me for a long time when I was

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Speaker 2: doing comedy is I would get nervous, and I would be.

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Speaker 4: Frustrated to be nervous because I.

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Speaker 2: Was like, I know, I just want to do good,

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Speaker 2: and I know being nervous is going to make me

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Speaker 2: not too good, right, And then I would just become

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Speaker 2: very short of breath, so it kind of run out

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Speaker 2: of air, and the audience knows you're doing it and

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Speaker 2: knows why it's happening, so they can't be comfortable, right,

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Speaker 2: and then you just kind of like a like a

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Speaker 2: balloon losing its air slowly in the corner. You just

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Speaker 2: kind of eat it quietly until you're done with your set.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I think that when you meet people that actually say,

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Speaker 1: I do not enjoy stand up comedy. I've met people,

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Speaker 1: even people that have a sense of humor, they can't

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Speaker 1: handle how makes them feel to see a comedian not fail, yeah,

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00:24:04,760 --> 00:24:08,080
Speaker 1: or just being nervous, or they put themselves in their

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Speaker 1: shoes and then they can't enjoy it. Yeah, And I'm

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Speaker 1: starting to understand that, right, well.

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00:24:16,320 --> 00:24:20,320
Speaker 2: Because you can't you as the stand up comedian can't

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Speaker 2: afford to entertain that mindset.

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Speaker 4: So you've taught yourself how not to even address it.

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Speaker 1: Right, But I just pretend it's not happening.

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Speaker 4: It's not that's not real. Don't worry about it.

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Speaker 1: I'm afraid, I very much. I've always done that. But

445
00:24:37,440 --> 00:24:41,120
Speaker 1: I'm trying to take my time, take my breaths, and

446
00:24:41,359 --> 00:24:47,280
Speaker 1: take my beta blockers, and then that takes your nervousness.

447
00:24:48,160 --> 00:24:51,560
Speaker 1: It doesn't take it away, but it doesn't make you

448
00:24:52,560 --> 00:24:55,720
Speaker 1: react in a shorter breath, handshaking type of way.

449
00:24:55,880 --> 00:24:58,399
Speaker 4: Oh does it make your give you dry mouth?

450
00:24:59,160 --> 00:24:59,240
Speaker 2: It?

451
00:24:59,359 --> 00:25:04,000
Speaker 1: Certainly yes, and leg spasms. But but I'm worth it.

452
00:25:04,119 --> 00:25:06,560
Speaker 1: I have a little one like if it's a big

453
00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:09,919
Speaker 1: scary audition and you blow it because you show your nerves,

454
00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:11,400
Speaker 1: which I have done countless time.

455
00:25:11,480 --> 00:25:12,280
Speaker 4: That's all I've ever done.

456
00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:15,480
Speaker 1: I only wish it's a it's a it's a the

457
00:25:15,600 --> 00:25:20,040
Speaker 1: stars use them. It's not something you should take rigor regularly.

458
00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:24,720
Speaker 1: Mm hm. Always had trouble with that word and Steph, Yes,

459
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:27,719
Speaker 1: but I am. I'm going to take a little bit

460
00:25:27,760 --> 00:25:31,320
Speaker 1: of a beta blocker for this. An upcoming golf tournament

461
00:25:31,359 --> 00:25:35,760
Speaker 1: that isn't celebrity comedian. It's just pros and ams. Oh,

462
00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:38,439
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be one of the ams. Yeah, it's a

463
00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:42,680
Speaker 1: big one and I'm nervous already. But if I take

464
00:25:42,720 --> 00:25:45,560
Speaker 1: that little blocker, it shuts out some of the voices.

465
00:25:46,080 --> 00:25:49,840
Speaker 2: No, does that affect performance?

466
00:25:50,440 --> 00:25:54,320
Speaker 4: If you are not tapped in authentically, you're.

467
00:25:54,440 --> 00:25:57,600
Speaker 1: That's the thing. And I'm I'm speaking about this this

468
00:25:57,800 --> 00:26:03,120
Speaker 1: drug without knowing much about it or having ever taken it. Oh,

469
00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:08,439
Speaker 1: it's just been prescribed to me by passers by that

470
00:26:08,520 --> 00:26:09,080
Speaker 1: don't know me.

471
00:26:10,640 --> 00:26:12,920
Speaker 4: The unsafest way to take drugs.

472
00:26:12,600 --> 00:26:17,040
Speaker 1: Actors and people that get voices. I self sabotage in

473
00:26:17,119 --> 00:26:22,199
Speaker 1: the moment with everything, especially physical things skateboarding and golf, Like,

474
00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:25,359
Speaker 1: I know I can do something, and then there's a

475
00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:29,120
Speaker 1: voice and with stand up. This voice in my head says,

476
00:26:28,680 --> 00:26:30,880
Speaker 1: let's let's see what it would feel like to blow

477
00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:33,159
Speaker 1: it right now, or just have your mind go blank,

478
00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:36,879
Speaker 1: or do something weird with your elbow as you bring

479
00:26:36,920 --> 00:26:39,600
Speaker 1: the club face up, or maybe let's just see what

480
00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:42,720
Speaker 1: it feels like to have the skateboard blast into your

481
00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:46,400
Speaker 1: taint area. These are all things I know I can control,

482
00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:50,440
Speaker 1: and when they happen, I'm so frustrated that I let

483
00:26:50,560 --> 00:26:54,280
Speaker 1: my brain tell my body to do that. That's a

484
00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:55,680
Speaker 1: famous rock. It has to be.

485
00:26:56,160 --> 00:26:57,200
Speaker 4: I think it's Eagle Rock.

486
00:26:57,680 --> 00:26:59,640
Speaker 1: That is the great Eagle Rock.

487
00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:00,720
Speaker 4: Because look, it looks like an eagle.

488
00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:04,439
Speaker 1: It sure does, wow, doesn't it. It looks like the

489
00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:06,119
Speaker 1: muppet eagle that does the news.

490
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:09,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, there he is the eagle.

491
00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:16,080
Speaker 1: Yes, Samuel Eagle, the h Peabody Award winning you're analist.

492
00:27:16,920 --> 00:27:18,400
Speaker 1: People climb on that rock.

493
00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:23,879
Speaker 2: I also love self sabotage myself, and one of my

494
00:27:23,920 --> 00:27:27,080
Speaker 2: favorite ways to do it is to actually look into

495
00:27:27,080 --> 00:27:30,040
Speaker 2: the audience and see who you can see, and see

496
00:27:30,080 --> 00:27:33,639
Speaker 2: who you can immediately tell a story about all the

497
00:27:33,680 --> 00:27:36,760
Speaker 2: ways they hate you, and get so lost in that

498
00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:39,439
Speaker 2: story that you can't even focus on what you're supposed

499
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:39,880
Speaker 2: to be saying.

500
00:27:40,000 --> 00:27:42,159
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you're not saying this story out loud to

501
00:27:42,200 --> 00:27:43,400
Speaker 1: the people. You're keeping it.

502
00:27:43,280 --> 00:27:45,760
Speaker 2: To yourself while you do your dumb jokes that you've

503
00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:48,600
Speaker 2: done twenty nine times. So then you're just like, man,

504
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:50,720
Speaker 2: this guy fucking hates me because he's blonde.

505
00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:52,520
Speaker 1: I better focus on him.

506
00:27:52,680 --> 00:27:57,280
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, just because of the way his arms are

507
00:27:57,280 --> 00:28:00,439
Speaker 5: crossed and his shirt pattern, I know he does like me.

508
00:28:00,640 --> 00:28:01,640
Speaker 4: Andy's a Nazi.

509
00:28:01,960 --> 00:28:06,840
Speaker 1: Yes, usually usually, Yeah, it's amazing this thing that I

510
00:28:06,880 --> 00:28:10,880
Speaker 1: have in my pocket that i'm saving, Well apparently lessens

511
00:28:10,920 --> 00:28:13,680
Speaker 1: that voice. And you know I'm not a big drug dealer.

512
00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:18,480
Speaker 4: Not But if you want some, say the word.

513
00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:21,160
Speaker 1: Say the word. I've got a whole bag of them.

514
00:28:21,359 --> 00:28:23,760
Speaker 4: How about now that we've made it to Pasadena? Can

515
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:24,639
Speaker 4: you smell my shirt?

516
00:28:27,160 --> 00:28:29,320
Speaker 1: No? It smells Grayton here.

517
00:28:29,520 --> 00:28:35,560
Speaker 2: I have a concern a sour shirt smell concern almost

518
00:28:35,680 --> 00:28:36,280
Speaker 2: all the time.

519
00:28:36,400 --> 00:28:40,360
Speaker 1: And you mentioned it happens after a shirt has maybe

520
00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:42,920
Speaker 1: stayed damp too long, and not the driver. When I

521
00:28:43,040 --> 00:28:44,800
Speaker 1: brought up mildew, you said no.

522
00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:48,680
Speaker 4: Never I shouted no when I slapped you on the knuckles.

523
00:28:48,880 --> 00:28:52,120
Speaker 1: But if I were to describe the smell of mildew,

524
00:28:52,280 --> 00:28:54,040
Speaker 1: the word sour would be the first on the.

525
00:28:54,000 --> 00:28:58,280
Speaker 2: List, would it, really? I don't. I think mine is

526
00:28:58,320 --> 00:29:03,320
Speaker 2: more of a there's always something going on with my

527
00:29:03,560 --> 00:29:06,640
Speaker 2: washing machine, and so it just feels like it should

528
00:29:06,640 --> 00:29:09,160
Speaker 2: have run in the washing machine longer with more soap,

529
00:29:09,560 --> 00:29:13,080
Speaker 2: but it didn't, so because it didn't didn't get fully clean.

530
00:29:14,440 --> 00:29:15,320
Speaker 4: The way it was supposed to.

531
00:29:15,320 --> 00:29:19,000
Speaker 1: Do, right, I always use plenty of soap sometimes it's

532
00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:19,600
Speaker 1: a bad thing.

533
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:20,200
Speaker 4: Yeah.

534
00:29:20,960 --> 00:29:24,400
Speaker 1: The first time I worked a comedy club in Dayton, Ohio,

535
00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:28,680
Speaker 1: I was featuring for the great Eddie Gosling, oh and

536
00:29:29,880 --> 00:29:34,440
Speaker 1: Ryan Singer was emcing. This was two thousand and one

537
00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:41,040
Speaker 1: or two. I The condo was a like twelfth floor apartment,

538
00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:45,240
Speaker 1: and I went to do the dishes, trying to be responsible.

539
00:29:45,320 --> 00:29:49,200
Speaker 1: I didn't grow up with a dishwasher. You put the

540
00:29:49,240 --> 00:29:52,720
Speaker 1: powder detergent in a dishwasher. Yeah, I put like liquid

541
00:29:53,560 --> 00:29:58,320
Speaker 1: soap in the dishwasher, and the entire apartment turned to

542
00:29:58,400 --> 00:30:07,240
Speaker 1: a nineteen nineties eternity foam party, like all wall to wall, four.

543
00:30:07,080 --> 00:30:13,880
Speaker 6: Feet of phone and I did damp it tripped it

544
00:30:13,920 --> 00:30:17,880
Speaker 6: then turned to soapy water that damaged I don't even

545
00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:19,760
Speaker 6: know about the damage because I left town.

546
00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:25,040
Speaker 1: Yeah. Smart, Yeah, it's uh oh, that was such a

547
00:30:25,080 --> 00:30:26,000
Speaker 1: memorable weekend.

548
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:28,320
Speaker 2: You know what's funny too, is because that is a

549
00:30:28,440 --> 00:30:33,120
Speaker 2: very understandable mistake, So like the idea that that mistake

550
00:30:33,280 --> 00:30:37,360
Speaker 2: is so wildly out of control when it must happen

551
00:30:38,120 --> 00:30:40,200
Speaker 2: often right on.

552
00:30:40,760 --> 00:30:43,720
Speaker 7: No one was on my side, Yeah, I was, even

553
00:30:43,840 --> 00:30:44,480
Speaker 7: Eddie Gosling.

554
00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:49,080
Speaker 1: Eddie laughed his ass off. He couldn't believe I did it.

555
00:30:49,200 --> 00:30:52,080
Speaker 1: I'm like, I do I have to yell that I

556
00:30:52,120 --> 00:30:56,280
Speaker 1: grew up for I mean, hand washed dishes. I only

557
00:30:56,360 --> 00:31:01,320
Speaker 1: know this liquid stuff to be for dishes. The powder

558
00:31:01,560 --> 00:31:06,000
Speaker 1: that's rich people. Yeah, maybe we did have a dishwasher.

559
00:31:06,320 --> 00:31:09,280
Speaker 1: I just wasn't. I didn't have a lot of chore.

560
00:31:09,480 --> 00:31:12,840
Speaker 2: You didn't actually do the dishes. It's different than growing

561
00:31:12,920 --> 00:31:14,320
Speaker 2: up so poor you didn't have.

562
00:31:14,280 --> 00:31:16,760
Speaker 1: The dish True, it's true. I think on the fourth

563
00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:21,200
Speaker 1: floor of my childhood home we did have a dishwasher. Jesus, Yeah,

564
00:31:21,200 --> 00:31:23,800
Speaker 1: that third kitchen. But I don't know. Every time I

565
00:31:23,960 --> 00:31:27,000
Speaker 1: asked about it, our butler was like, don't snap back

566
00:31:27,040 --> 00:31:27,280
Speaker 1: at me.

567
00:31:28,280 --> 00:31:30,960
Speaker 4: You're like, wait a second. Butlers aren't supposed to talk

568
00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:32,280
Speaker 4: like that, are you my father?

569
00:31:33,880 --> 00:31:38,040
Speaker 1: I just realized, Yeah, oh, so many costumes, so much confusion.

570
00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:43,120
Speaker 1: It's being homeschooled. Now I'm the gym teacher. Now I'm

571
00:31:43,160 --> 00:31:44,240
Speaker 1: the class bully.

572
00:31:45,040 --> 00:31:51,400
Speaker 2: Now I'm the care taker, sorry, undertaker to the undertaker

573
00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:52,040
Speaker 2: of the wrestler.

574
00:31:52,200 --> 00:31:57,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, the school's gravedigger for all those students, the.

575
00:31:59,400 --> 00:32:00,360
Speaker 4: Six students school.

576
00:32:02,480 --> 00:32:07,360
Speaker 1: Oh man, Yeah, that was that's quite the weekend that

577
00:32:07,360 --> 00:32:10,520
Speaker 1: that was. You know, I don't like pranks ha ha

578
00:32:10,680 --> 00:32:13,440
Speaker 1: I got you. I lied, Yeah, and you were scared.

579
00:32:13,680 --> 00:32:19,000
Speaker 1: It's the first holiday. Yeah, I was that. I kind

580
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:21,200
Speaker 1: of knew that i'd turned the apartment to a phone

581
00:32:21,240 --> 00:32:25,960
Speaker 1: party because the guy called me, the club owner called

582
00:32:25,960 --> 00:32:29,480
Speaker 1: me at six am and said, what are you still

583
00:32:29,520 --> 00:32:33,080
Speaker 1: doing there? You're supposed to be a morning radio And

584
00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:35,280
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, I've heard of morning radio. Oh no,

585
00:32:35,680 --> 00:32:38,320
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. What do I do? I'll call it

586
00:32:38,480 --> 00:32:42,880
Speaker 1: taxi And he's like, a gotcha, woke me up for

587
00:32:42,960 --> 00:32:43,440
Speaker 1: this prank?

588
00:32:43,600 --> 00:32:44,320
Speaker 2: Oh?

589
00:32:44,600 --> 00:32:45,080
Speaker 4: Yeah.

590
00:32:45,600 --> 00:32:48,960
Speaker 1: I don't remember his name, but I remember his face

591
00:32:49,440 --> 00:32:52,280
Speaker 1: etched into my list of enemies.

592
00:32:51,920 --> 00:32:54,080
Speaker 4: Etched into your ear listening on the phone.

593
00:32:54,360 --> 00:32:56,720
Speaker 1: Yes, maybe to this podcast.

594
00:32:56,760 --> 00:32:59,760
Speaker 4: Hey, Jim, here's here's the thing, Jim.

595
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:00,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, Jim.

596
00:33:00,600 --> 00:33:03,640
Speaker 2: Pranks are all fun and games until you're calling people

597
00:33:03,680 --> 00:33:05,360
Speaker 2: on the phone at fucking six am.

598
00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:06,280
Speaker 4: Are you joking?

599
00:33:06,520 --> 00:33:09,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, on the heels of us, just praising all gems.

600
00:33:10,400 --> 00:33:12,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, pranks. Jim runed it for the good gems.

601
00:33:12,800 --> 00:33:13,000
Speaker 3: Yeah.

602
00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:18,160
Speaker 1: Yeah. I also left in Dayton, Ohio, where I saw

603
00:33:18,840 --> 00:33:21,640
Speaker 1: Dave Chappelle at the skate park doing three sixty flips.

604
00:33:22,120 --> 00:33:22,440
Speaker 4: Oh.

605
00:33:22,480 --> 00:33:24,200
Speaker 1: That's the part of the story I tell the most

606
00:33:24,400 --> 00:33:27,240
Speaker 1: because he used to be a little skinny skater kid.

607
00:33:27,720 --> 00:33:29,360
Speaker 1: He sat at the bar and didn't watch any of

608
00:33:29,360 --> 00:33:31,440
Speaker 1: our shows. But he was nice.

609
00:33:32,560 --> 00:33:34,560
Speaker 4: He was a child, he was tired of comedy.

610
00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:40,120
Speaker 1: I knew him from from that weed movie Baked Faith,

611
00:33:40,600 --> 00:33:44,920
Speaker 1: Baked Half, the Baked Half. But I was doing a

612
00:33:45,000 --> 00:33:50,200
Speaker 1: thing to add time to my act, where I drew

613
00:33:50,440 --> 00:33:53,040
Speaker 1: picture like a Bob Ross thing. I had an easel

614
00:33:53,120 --> 00:33:58,000
Speaker 1: and I would do these drawings that gradually became sexually

615
00:33:58,040 --> 00:34:02,360
Speaker 1: explicit to me. It was my last episode of my

616
00:34:02,440 --> 00:34:05,880
Speaker 1: PBS show. I would wear a curly wig and it

617
00:34:05,960 --> 00:34:10,919
Speaker 1: was called the Imagination Station, and you know, pentagrams and

618
00:34:11,560 --> 00:34:16,759
Speaker 1: sexual things ensuit with drawing trickery. It was actually, now

619
00:34:16,960 --> 00:34:19,879
Speaker 1: looking back, more creative than things I do now. Sure,

620
00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:22,839
Speaker 1: But I needed an easel, and I went to an

621
00:34:22,960 --> 00:34:26,520
Speaker 1: art instruction place and said, may I borrow an easel?

622
00:34:26,680 --> 00:34:29,319
Speaker 1: She said, well, we need something of yours. And rather

623
00:34:29,360 --> 00:34:33,399
Speaker 1: than give my driver's license or something, somehow, I don't

624
00:34:33,400 --> 00:34:35,160
Speaker 1: know if it was her idea or mine, I left

625
00:34:35,239 --> 00:34:38,680
Speaker 1: one of my shoes and so I walked home with

626
00:34:38,719 --> 00:34:42,080
Speaker 1: this easel. What She's like, well, you'll definitely come back

627
00:34:42,120 --> 00:34:43,640
Speaker 1: for your shoe, and I'm like, yeah, I kind of

628
00:34:43,680 --> 00:34:45,880
Speaker 1: wish I had it for the walk home. I had walked,

629
00:34:46,080 --> 00:34:48,799
Speaker 1: so I walked back with this easel, one shoe and

630
00:34:48,840 --> 00:34:55,960
Speaker 1: a sock. And I never did Yes, of course I

631
00:34:56,040 --> 00:35:01,080
Speaker 1: didn't the flight. I woke up late. I left that shoe.

632
00:35:01,400 --> 00:35:04,560
Speaker 1: Yeah you did, But I did organize an easel drop off.

633
00:35:06,719 --> 00:35:08,920
Speaker 2: Oh you You didn't keep the easel.

634
00:35:09,760 --> 00:35:12,280
Speaker 1: I left it in the condo, but it was safely

635
00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:16,319
Speaker 1: brought back. Nice maybe baby by that. There's a sweet man,

636
00:35:16,440 --> 00:35:20,480
Speaker 1: Jim that I spoke ill of. He did it. I

637
00:35:20,520 --> 00:35:21,440
Speaker 1: think he did it for me.

638
00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:24,640
Speaker 2: But you wouldn't take just one extra moment to get

639
00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:25,600
Speaker 2: your fucking shoe.

640
00:35:26,680 --> 00:35:31,360
Speaker 1: I it was across town. It wasn't the day of

641
00:35:31,520 --> 00:35:37,560
Speaker 1: ubers and easy ways to transport yourself. Okay, I was drunk,

642
00:35:37,680 --> 00:35:39,200
Speaker 1: care of it's not what you want to hear it.

643
00:35:39,719 --> 00:35:41,560
Speaker 1: I was probably throwing up. I knew I had a

644
00:35:41,560 --> 00:35:43,239
Speaker 1: flight the next day. You stay up all night and

645
00:35:43,280 --> 00:35:49,200
Speaker 1: you'd drink your friend whiskey. That's probably what exactly happened.

646
00:35:49,320 --> 00:35:53,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, at least you organized something. Yeah you got

647
00:35:53,560 --> 00:35:56,279
Speaker 2: the important part. You didn't steal an easel for no

648
00:35:56,400 --> 00:35:57,680
Speaker 2: reason and leave it somewhere.

649
00:35:57,840 --> 00:36:07,000
Speaker 1: No, Yeah, that's good. Very responsibly responsively extensively. Uh, I'll

650
00:36:07,040 --> 00:36:14,440
Speaker 1: just get out here. Well I arranged for it, yes, smart, Yes,

651
00:36:15,480 --> 00:36:20,399
Speaker 1: we're on our way to our friend. Friend of the show,

652
00:36:20,480 --> 00:36:25,960
Speaker 1: David Huntsberger lives just past this up this daunting bridge.

653
00:36:26,880 --> 00:36:29,480
Speaker 1: Not bridge, it's like a I think it is a bridge.

654
00:36:29,560 --> 00:36:30,560
Speaker 1: It's just walls.

655
00:36:31,239 --> 00:36:34,000
Speaker 2: Oh, maybe have some retaining walls that were built to

656
00:36:34,040 --> 00:36:35,000
Speaker 2: look like a bridge.

657
00:36:35,239 --> 00:36:38,600
Speaker 1: Yes, it's very of course featured in the movie Chinatown.

658
00:36:39,400 --> 00:36:45,600
Speaker 1: But I he had hernia surgery and they needed and

659
00:36:45,719 --> 00:36:50,960
Speaker 1: will need help as he recovers. Taking his children to

660
00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:54,600
Speaker 1: school and I literally just needed to put them in

661
00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:56,920
Speaker 1: and out of the car seat and we had it

662
00:36:56,960 --> 00:36:57,600
Speaker 1: was so fun.

663
00:36:58,800 --> 00:37:00,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, a little, a little so what it's like to

664
00:37:00,960 --> 00:37:04,759
Speaker 2: be a dad, Just that one tiny part.

665
00:37:04,920 --> 00:37:09,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's all I need. And uh yeah it was

666
00:37:09,000 --> 00:37:10,200
Speaker 1: a great It was a great time.

667
00:37:10,680 --> 00:37:11,320
Speaker 4: That's nice.

668
00:37:11,520 --> 00:37:14,719
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's it's it was enjoyable. I may I may

669
00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:15,320
Speaker 1: do it again.

670
00:37:17,080 --> 00:37:19,240
Speaker 4: I mean, don't spoil them.

671
00:37:19,760 --> 00:37:25,920
Speaker 1: No, no, I've learned from my years in daycare. Uh

672
00:37:26,080 --> 00:37:28,839
Speaker 1: there's a daycare center next to my apartment. I had

673
00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:32,279
Speaker 1: a few hours a week. Really, I did not spoil.

674
00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:36,279
Speaker 2: There's no way they would just let some random work

675
00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:37,600
Speaker 2: at the daycare, would they.

676
00:37:37,920 --> 00:37:42,160
Speaker 1: Yes, Oh, I was friends with the owner, Jesus Christ.

677
00:37:42,280 --> 00:37:44,200
Speaker 1: I was great with those kids. Are you kidding me?

678
00:37:45,120 --> 00:37:49,200
Speaker 5: They individually wrote me letters of pictures of me driving

679
00:37:49,239 --> 00:37:51,240
Speaker 5: to Texas to start my comedy career.

680
00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:51,920
Speaker 4: They had to.

681
00:37:52,000 --> 00:37:56,200
Speaker 1: It was the assignment that maybe maybe their parents put

682
00:37:56,239 --> 00:37:56,640
Speaker 1: them up to it.

683
00:37:56,880 --> 00:37:57,640
Speaker 4: You think about it.

684
00:37:58,239 --> 00:38:01,719
Speaker 5: Yeah, did I get that. At the beginning of the day,

685
00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:04,360
Speaker 5: I said, Okay, we're all going to draw pictures today

686
00:38:04,520 --> 00:38:05,279
Speaker 5: to send.

687
00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:05,960
Speaker 1: Me off to Texas.

688
00:38:06,080 --> 00:38:08,960
Speaker 2: Kip, so all your well wishes and nothing negative.

689
00:38:10,200 --> 00:38:12,600
Speaker 1: They'd say, okay, Chris with a mustache, because that's what

690
00:38:12,640 --> 00:38:13,200
Speaker 1: they called me.

691
00:38:13,400 --> 00:38:14,160
Speaker 4: So you'll go.

692
00:38:14,080 --> 00:38:17,080
Speaker 2: First, old man, and you won't use your turn signal

693
00:38:17,239 --> 00:38:17,680
Speaker 2: too late.

694
00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:19,680
Speaker 4: Did you see he turned it on halfway through?

695
00:38:19,920 --> 00:38:21,919
Speaker 1: Oh? Wow, enjoy your senior year.

696
00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:28,200
Speaker 2: I bet you're not even graduating with a three point five.

697
00:38:28,600 --> 00:38:33,480
Speaker 1: Yeah. The only graduating you're doing is the cylinder graduated

698
00:38:33,600 --> 00:38:37,759
Speaker 1: cylinder in the science class. Here, let's do it again.

699
00:38:37,880 --> 00:38:43,319
Speaker 4: Okay, take two. Uh, you're a full senior year. We'll

700
00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:44,680
Speaker 4: only get a three point five.

701
00:38:45,320 --> 00:38:47,960
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, you're not graduating.

702
00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:49,760
Speaker 4: Cylinder.

703
00:38:50,200 --> 00:38:57,560
Speaker 1: Oh yes, unless we're talking about a cylinder. You'll never

704
00:38:57,640 --> 00:39:00,600
Speaker 1: be graduated unless we're talking cylinders. There we go.

705
00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:01,840
Speaker 7: It is it is, and.

706
00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:04,480
Speaker 4: You've been listening to need a ride?

707
00:39:05,239 --> 00:39:09,840
Speaker 1: D y n A are did we really just stop?

708
00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:10,160
Speaker 4: Sure?

709
00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:16,640
Speaker 1: Was that a quick one? Oh that's all right?

710
00:39:16,880 --> 00:39:19,520
Speaker 4: Well that could be the ending. It could be, but

711
00:39:19,560 --> 00:39:22,240
Speaker 4: good luck stitching anything into the middle.

712
00:39:22,640 --> 00:39:27,880
Speaker 1: Consider this bonus content since we did just wrap the

713
00:39:27,960 --> 00:39:28,799
Speaker 1: credits and rolls.

714
00:39:28,880 --> 00:39:31,480
Speaker 4: Oh okay, but now we're gonna play bloopers.

715
00:39:31,560 --> 00:39:34,959
Speaker 2: This is a yeah post a post show talk down

716
00:39:35,080 --> 00:39:36,799
Speaker 2: about what didn't didn't work?

717
00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:42,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, definitely the redoing of jokes hilarious. It was

718
00:39:42,440 --> 00:39:45,200
Speaker 1: a great idea on paper the whole time we wrote

719
00:39:45,239 --> 00:39:50,920
Speaker 1: it out here. But there's been times we've had like

720
00:39:51,040 --> 00:39:55,160
Speaker 1: a forty five minute episode. Yeah, that one's like I

721
00:39:55,200 --> 00:39:57,000
Speaker 1: want my money back. No.

722
00:39:57,120 --> 00:40:01,360
Speaker 2: I think most people are satisfied if it's over thirty minutes,

723
00:40:01,640 --> 00:40:03,439
Speaker 2: and happy if it's over forty five.

724
00:40:03,840 --> 00:40:09,160
Speaker 4: Right, although we have on average done like our hour ten. Right.

725
00:40:09,360 --> 00:40:14,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you've given more than enough and now consistently

726
00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:17,840
Speaker 1: you're all given us guff for this this maybe forty

727
00:40:17,880 --> 00:40:19,840
Speaker 1: five second episode if you're lucky.

728
00:40:20,280 --> 00:40:23,880
Speaker 2: This just the constant bitching about this episode.

729
00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:26,520
Speaker 1: Why do you keep going on and on?

730
00:40:27,040 --> 00:40:32,000
Speaker 2: We read your email. We got your tersely worded long

731
00:40:32,440 --> 00:40:35,280
Speaker 2: handed email. Uh regular mail?

732
00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:40,880
Speaker 1: Yes, sorry, yes here, we've got your curtly or tersely

733
00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:47,200
Speaker 1: hand take for you. We've got your Curtly tersely. Now

734
00:40:47,239 --> 00:40:50,160
Speaker 1: I want that on my desk in the morning with

735
00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:52,840
Speaker 1: your badge. Take four.

736
00:40:52,960 --> 00:40:55,359
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm too old for this shit.

737
00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:58,560
Speaker 1: I'm too old for this shit. Got to me on

738
00:40:58,600 --> 00:41:01,880
Speaker 1: a toilet with a long beard.

739
00:41:02,360 --> 00:41:04,280
Speaker 2: Isn't that what you said the night that you dressed

740
00:41:04,360 --> 00:41:06,640
Speaker 2: up like you were on a toilet on Halloween?

741
00:41:07,600 --> 00:41:11,239
Speaker 5: I guarantee I did, because I always thought it would

742
00:41:11,280 --> 00:41:15,080
Speaker 5: be funny to cut it, like if you were doing

743
00:41:15,120 --> 00:41:20,280
Speaker 5: pranks while filming a lethal weapon. If during the iconic

744
00:41:20,360 --> 00:41:23,960
Speaker 5: line read he was like, I'm getting too old for

745
00:41:24,000 --> 00:41:26,960
Speaker 5: this ship. If it showed him then on that scene

746
00:41:26,960 --> 00:41:29,000
Speaker 5: where he's stuck on the toilet because it's.

747
00:41:28,840 --> 00:41:33,920
Speaker 1: Got a bomb on it, right, let me think. Let

748
00:41:33,960 --> 00:41:38,680
Speaker 1: me I honestly think that I just did and have

749
00:41:38,800 --> 00:41:41,360
Speaker 1: been doing a Doug Benson joke, because I think he

750
00:41:41,400 --> 00:41:43,640
Speaker 1: has a joke where he says I'm getting too old

751
00:41:43,719 --> 00:41:46,920
Speaker 1: for this ship and he points down it is the same.

752
00:41:47,200 --> 00:41:49,160
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, okay, sorry Doug.

753
00:41:49,440 --> 00:41:51,400
Speaker 4: Props to Doug Benson.

754
00:41:51,760 --> 00:41:58,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, but the checks in the mail. Please don't be litigious.

755
00:42:00,040 --> 00:42:02,160
Speaker 2: Doesn't it seem like there's no traffic anywhere and it's

756
00:42:02,239 --> 00:42:05,080
Speaker 2: kind of creepy, Yeah.

757
00:42:04,920 --> 00:42:05,920
Speaker 4: Wide open roads.

758
00:42:06,760 --> 00:42:09,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, whenever it feels like that, I'm like, should I

759
00:42:09,239 --> 00:42:13,880
Speaker 1: be listening to the radio? Yeah, we've been told to

760
00:42:14,000 --> 00:42:16,800
Speaker 1: stay indoors and I'm just walking around whistling.

761
00:42:17,239 --> 00:42:20,440
Speaker 4: Where's Julia Roberts right now? Me?

762
00:42:20,800 --> 00:42:25,000
Speaker 1: T help me everything? You know? Julia? She used to

763
00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:30,120
Speaker 1: live somewhere near me in Venice. Really, she'd have big sunglasses,

764
00:42:30,160 --> 00:42:33,600
Speaker 1: but she has such a recognizable mouth that I was like,

765
00:42:33,719 --> 00:42:35,160
Speaker 1: that is Julia.

766
00:42:34,920 --> 00:42:37,920
Speaker 4: Roberts, lifelong famous person forever.

767
00:42:38,160 --> 00:42:38,440
Speaker 1: Yeah.

768
00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:40,880
Speaker 4: Did you ever see Mystic Pizza?

769
00:42:41,360 --> 00:42:48,520
Speaker 1: I love Mystic Pizza. Pizza, Mystic Pizza Pizza. It is

770
00:42:48,600 --> 00:42:52,759
Speaker 1: to be called where are you pointing at?

771
00:42:52,840 --> 00:42:54,000
Speaker 4: I was supposed to turn down there?

772
00:42:54,120 --> 00:42:58,600
Speaker 1: Oh okay, but I was laughing Pizza It's okay. Who

773
00:42:58,760 --> 00:43:02,080
Speaker 1: is the the actress in that that is always good?

774
00:43:02,520 --> 00:43:03,120
Speaker 4: Yeah?

775
00:43:03,160 --> 00:43:05,400
Speaker 1: And has an interesting voice?

776
00:43:06,040 --> 00:43:06,239
Speaker 7: Name?

777
00:43:06,840 --> 00:43:09,400
Speaker 2: She's the one that gets together with the with the

778
00:43:09,440 --> 00:43:16,040
Speaker 2: married man. Accidentally, Yes, that is I want to say. Okay,

779
00:43:16,320 --> 00:43:22,160
Speaker 2: it's Annabeth Gish. Her grandmother or maybe great grandmother was

780
00:43:22,800 --> 00:43:27,160
Speaker 2: Lillian Gish, one of the first famous actresses in Hollywood.

781
00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:33,080
Speaker 1: I'm thinking, and I love that history, but I'm thinking

782
00:43:33,120 --> 00:43:34,080
Speaker 1: of someone else.

783
00:43:35,200 --> 00:43:37,520
Speaker 4: You're thinking of the one that's all business short.

784
00:43:38,400 --> 00:43:41,320
Speaker 1: Yes, sadass Yes, I like her and everything.

785
00:43:41,480 --> 00:43:49,600
Speaker 7: Yes, and Lily, Yes, Lily, Yep, it's Lily, Lily, Lily

786
00:43:50,360 --> 00:43:52,600
Speaker 7: hal damn joy Lily.

787
00:43:53,640 --> 00:43:57,560
Speaker 2: Lily, who was also in Sae Anything. She's the woman

788
00:43:57,560 --> 00:43:59,880
Speaker 2: that rand yeah fifty six songs.

789
00:43:59,680 --> 00:44:01,920
Speaker 1: About Yes, stop yelling, Tomlin.

790
00:44:02,280 --> 00:44:06,760
Speaker 2: It is Lily blank Lily one syllable.

791
00:44:07,000 --> 00:44:10,239
Speaker 1: Yes, I'm gonna look it up. I mean, that's what

792
00:44:10,320 --> 00:44:13,439
Speaker 1: it's resorted to. You guys, this is a podcast where

793
00:44:13,480 --> 00:44:15,680
Speaker 1: I look at my phone. You might as well be

794
00:44:15,800 --> 00:44:18,400
Speaker 1: watching a movie with me, because I'm going to IMDb.

795
00:44:18,880 --> 00:44:21,160
Speaker 4: Lily Saylor, thank you, thank you.

796
00:44:21,239 --> 00:44:21,600
Speaker 1: Thank you.

797
00:44:21,680 --> 00:44:24,920
Speaker 5: I couldn't remember my own passcode, and it doesn't. My

798
00:44:25,080 --> 00:44:27,480
Speaker 5: phone says, there's no way this is what you look

799
00:44:27,600 --> 00:44:28,280
Speaker 5: like anymore.

800
00:44:28,600 --> 00:44:32,120
Speaker 2: I also was totally wrong, Oh look at giant skeleton.

801
00:44:32,480 --> 00:44:33,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, year round.

802
00:44:33,640 --> 00:44:36,399
Speaker 2: I was totally wrong about it being one syllable that

803
00:44:36,680 --> 00:44:37,160
Speaker 2: hurts me.

804
00:44:37,880 --> 00:44:39,320
Speaker 4: I was just flat wrong.

805
00:44:39,120 --> 00:44:42,399
Speaker 1: About that, right right. You don't care when the word

806
00:44:42,440 --> 00:44:45,920
Speaker 1: itself isn't coming up but when the rhythm of that word.

807
00:44:45,760 --> 00:44:49,399
Speaker 2: Is off, then it means I'm off right, I might

808
00:44:49,400 --> 00:44:51,719
Speaker 2: as well hang it up, sir, Please be careful in

809
00:44:51,800 --> 00:44:53,080
Speaker 2: the bird scooter.

810
00:44:53,440 --> 00:44:57,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, I almost feel like he because of that helmet.

811
00:44:58,200 --> 00:45:01,640
Speaker 1: There is so little confidence in it boots bird scootering.

812
00:45:01,840 --> 00:45:04,080
Speaker 1: What is happening? Bird scootering ability?

813
00:45:04,239 --> 00:45:08,440
Speaker 4: We may have been struck by an invisible laser, right.

814
00:45:08,440 --> 00:45:10,520
Speaker 1: I think that's what happened, and it went right to

815
00:45:10,560 --> 00:45:16,919
Speaker 1: my frontal lobe, which assembles words. Oh, I fix her upper.

816
00:45:17,120 --> 00:45:18,560
Speaker 1: What if it's our.

817
00:45:18,480 --> 00:45:23,720
Speaker 4: Guests not looking good? We'll go up here?

818
00:45:23,920 --> 00:45:24,000
Speaker 2: No?

819
00:45:24,800 --> 00:45:28,280
Speaker 1: What? This is an interesting episode where we're we're still

820
00:45:28,320 --> 00:45:30,440
Speaker 1: recording and we are picking up the guests for the

821
00:45:30,520 --> 00:45:32,760
Speaker 1: next episode. This is like a perfect teaser.

822
00:45:32,840 --> 00:45:34,520
Speaker 4: Should we stop it and start I.

823
00:45:34,239 --> 00:45:36,000
Speaker 1: Think we should stop it and start again.

824
00:45:36,160 --> 00:45:39,560
Speaker 2: Okay, this is where we cut together my ending, where

825
00:45:39,680 --> 00:45:41,680
Speaker 2: I end it for the first time in twelve years.

826
00:45:41,760 --> 00:45:43,759
Speaker 1: I love it. I didn't know you've been wanting to.

827
00:45:44,360 --> 00:45:47,200
Speaker 2: I don't think I did want to, but I did

828
00:45:47,239 --> 00:45:52,279
Speaker 2: it because I see an opportunity and I'll fucking take it.

829
00:45:52,320 --> 00:45:52,800
Speaker 1: That's me.

830
00:45:53,200 --> 00:45:56,600
Speaker 5: Yeah, and I've just every part of me is itching

831
00:45:56,680 --> 00:45:58,080
Speaker 5: to say, you've been listening.

832
00:45:58,360 --> 00:46:01,279
Speaker 1: Do you need a Ride? Do you yan a R?

833
00:46:02,400 --> 00:46:03,200
Speaker 4: Double ending?

834
00:46:11,560 --> 00:46:13,600
Speaker 1: This has been an exactly Right.

835
00:46:13,520 --> 00:46:16,360
Speaker 4: Production produced by Analise Nelson.

836
00:46:16,360 --> 00:46:17,800
Speaker 1: Mixed by Edson Choi.

837
00:46:18,200 --> 00:46:20,080
Speaker 2: Our talent booker is Patrick Kottner.

838
00:46:20,360 --> 00:46:22,359
Speaker 1: Theme song by Karen Kilgarrett.

839
00:46:22,719 --> 00:46:24,160
Speaker 4: Artwork by Chris Fairbanks.

840
00:46:24,400 --> 00:46:27,480
Speaker 2: Follow the show on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at dinar

841
00:46:27,600 --> 00:46:30,680
Speaker 2: podcast That's d y n ar Podcast.

842
00:46:31,120 --> 00:46:34,680
Speaker 1: For more information, go to exactly rightmedia dot com.

843
00:46:34,680 --> 00:46:36,160
Speaker 4: Thank you both.

844
00:46:36,320 --> 00:46:36,960
Speaker 1: You're welcome