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Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, and welcome robes and TJ here and Bachelor

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Speaker 1: Nation stand up robes. You're excited. Season twenty eight of

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Speaker 1: The Bachelor just launched. His name is Joey. But as

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Speaker 1: Emma just explaining our wonderful producer here, who is twenty

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Speaker 1: two years old. I say that because it's relevant to

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Speaker 1: most of the conversations we have about Emma. She said, no,

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Speaker 1: it's not Joey. It's hot Joey.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, he's hot, that's what she told us. Yes, he

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Speaker 2: plays tennis and he's hot.

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Speaker 3: The tennis guy.

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Speaker 1: But it's still remarkable. Whether you love it, hate it,

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Speaker 1: like it, indifferent to it, it's a phenomenon that's been

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Speaker 1: around since two thousand and two, now twenty eight seasons

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Speaker 1: of The Bachelor, twenty seasons of The Bachelorette.

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Speaker 2: I believe it is, yeah, and it's entertaining. Also even

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Speaker 2: Bachelor in Paradise, which might be my favorite iteration of

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Speaker 2: the franchise, but I actually was looking it up today.

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Speaker 2: It is remarkable how many relations and ships, marriages, engagements,

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Speaker 2: children were born from this show. So it's yes, it's

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Speaker 2: fun to watch, but it actually has produced fairly impressive results.

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Speaker 2: I'm actually surprised by it.

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Speaker 1: Okay, so I was thrown off as we were getting

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Speaker 1: ready today because this is a Bachelor themed I shouldn't say,

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Speaker 1: as a Bachelor themed we have one of the most popular,

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Speaker 1: most famous, most talked about bachelors in the franchise history

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Speaker 1: sitting in the room with us. We were going to

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Speaker 1: talk to mad James here in the second he's sitting

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Speaker 1: here with a big old smile on his face. But

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Speaker 1: to you, I didn't realize when I'm looking up the

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Speaker 1: success rate of the Bachelor franchise, I'm looking to see

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Speaker 1: how many people on the Bachelor got married, I mean

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Speaker 1: on the Bachelorette. I didn't realize that the numbers are

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Speaker 1: inflated because they do count Bachelor in Paradise. I didn't

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Speaker 1: even know, of course it counted.

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Speaker 4: No, I didn't know.

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Speaker 3: I'm sorry, educate yourself. No, I'm kidding.

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Speaker 2: No, But I was really impressed by the couples that

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Speaker 2: are still together.

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Speaker 3: Those numbers are still low.

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Speaker 2: We should say, well, I mean, maybe my expectations were low.

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Speaker 1: Actually I was surprised. I shouldn't say. They haven't had

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Speaker 1: as many seasons of the Bachelor in Paradise, so they

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Speaker 1: do have a pretty good percentage as far as folks

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Speaker 1: staying together, getting together, getting married, which is great, but

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Speaker 1: the others don't have as great a track record. And

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Speaker 1: that's fine, but it's it's still no matter what, I

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Speaker 1: am blown away. I've only watched one season, full season of.

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Speaker 4: Either or Off.

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Speaker 1: It was a Bachelorette as a season I watched Have

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Speaker 1: You Committed To? A full season before.

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Speaker 2: The first one with Trista and Ryan. I was really

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Speaker 2: into that all those years ago. And then obviously, for

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Speaker 2: what we did for a living, we were constantly interviewing contestants,

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Speaker 2: so I watched episodes here and there, but for the

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Speaker 2: full season. In fact, for a while, my kids, even

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Speaker 2: when they were younger, we would have fun watching it

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Speaker 2: as a family. So it actually is family viewing because

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Speaker 2: you're learning about relationships and how people interact with each other.

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Speaker 1: It's it's interesting see that. I don't think it gets

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Speaker 1: credit for what you just said. People often it's just reality,

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Speaker 1: it's trash TV, or this isn't how you're supposed to

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Speaker 1: find love? How can any of this work out? But

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Speaker 1: I think you hit on something. No matter what I think,

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Speaker 1: we're all still we want love to work. We are rooting.

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Speaker 1: We have this hope in this no matter what, and

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Speaker 1: then we get cynical later. Sure, but I think it's original.

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Speaker 1: We are rooting for people and we were rooting for love, right.

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Speaker 2: I totally agree, And I find that I learn about

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Speaker 2: communication when I'm watching these shows. Maybe that sounds silly,

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Speaker 2: but I do think people's emotions when I'm watching it.

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Speaker 2: It's legit, it's real. It mirrors life.

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Speaker 1: This is how you learn to communicat in a relationships.

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Speaker 1: But I want to see how we're having problems many.

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Speaker 2: Other times, so do you. But how many times do

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Speaker 2: you actually get to watch other couples communicate? I mean,

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Speaker 2: you really get to watch it. And I know cameras

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Speaker 2: are there and it is in part fantasy, but there

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Speaker 2: is some real realness to those conversations that I found

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Speaker 2: to be an interesting and insightful.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes do you find you were turned off, maybe from

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Speaker 1: the franchise because of what we did for a living

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Speaker 1: and where we worked. We were inundated with it all

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Speaker 1: the time, so it almost felt like we were rebels, Like,

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Speaker 1: oh God, I got it. I don't want to have

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Speaker 1: to go I'm in work all day with this and

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Speaker 1: have to hear I don't want to go home.

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Speaker 3: And it was homework.

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Speaker 2: It was homework in a sense, but then if you

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Speaker 2: really actually sit down and watch it, I found it

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Speaker 2: to be not just entertaining, but fascinating and interesting too

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Speaker 2: on top of it.

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Speaker 1: So I only watched one season, and the one season

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Speaker 1: I watched was the season The Bachelorette of Rachel Lindsay.

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Speaker 1: I watched it from start to finish, every single second

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Speaker 1: of every single episode. I didn't realize she was a

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Speaker 1: contestant on the previous Bachelor season and she didn't get picked,

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Speaker 1: so then they made her the Bachelorette. I found this

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Speaker 1: out as I was on my way to work one morning.

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Speaker 1: I was on sixth Avenue about to make it left

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Speaker 1: on the forty fifth.

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Speaker 3: Oh, this left an impression with you.

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Speaker 1: It did, and you'll see why it is because I saw, Wow,

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Speaker 1: they're gonna have the first ever black lead. And the

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Speaker 1: first thoughts I had were, Oh, God, that poor girl,

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Speaker 1: because I knew what might be coming her way as

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Speaker 1: the first right and most of the contestants they were

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Speaker 1: going to give were probably not going to be black.

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Speaker 1: And what my mind started being concerned for her as

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Speaker 1: I was getting closer to the studio. I see the rundown.

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Speaker 1: Rachel Lindsay is on the show that day, so she's

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Speaker 1: in the studio. I had no idea. I walked in

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Speaker 1: and I immediately went looking for her. Rachel never met

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Speaker 1: her before. I found her dressing room where she was

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Speaker 1: getting hair and makeup done. I walked in, I closed

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Speaker 1: the door behind me. The first words I ever spoke

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Speaker 1: to Rachel Lindsay were, sister, I'm worried about you. And

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Speaker 1: she never met didn't know who I was, and she understood,

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Speaker 1: and she's been my girl ever since, and we have

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Speaker 1: We've been good for him because of that, because of

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Speaker 1: an understanding that you being a first and how this

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Speaker 1: show has gone about doing its business up to this point.

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Speaker 1: I was worried about her. Matt, I apologize. I didn't

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Speaker 1: get a chance to have that conversation with you before

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Speaker 1: you went on your venture. Everybody, please welcome mister Matt James.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, Thank you, of course, the first black bachelor

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Speaker 1: in franchise history. Before we get into a whole bunch

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Speaker 1: of stuff, how committed are you to the Beard?

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Speaker 4: The Beard's on his last leg? Really, the Beard's on

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Speaker 4: his last leg? Why? Just because as as I've evolved

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Speaker 4: in my affinity for running. I've I run in the cold,

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Speaker 4: I running all the elements. So it really is like

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Speaker 4: a natural built in weather proofer all the elements and

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Speaker 4: think about that. Yeah, so as it gets warmer, I'm

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Speaker 4: like a bear. I'm just gonna start shedding hibernation first.

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Speaker 4: So it's coming.

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Speaker 3: What does Rachel think of the beard?

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Speaker 4: Rachel's supportive and everything, so like she's so nice about it.

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Speaker 4: She's like, it looks good and she's never.

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Speaker 3: Ever told me to come, but she said it like that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I can read between the lines.

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Speaker 4: It might be it might be time and preface throwing

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Speaker 4: it with like Rachel if it ever becomes an issue,

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Speaker 4: like I don't care that much about it, Like it's

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Speaker 4: no sentimental value, Like this thing can go. And she's like, okay,

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Speaker 4: so when are we cutting it? It'll come soon.

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Speaker 1: It's like your kid bringing home like a drawing from

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Speaker 1: school and they want to put it up on the refrigerator.

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Speaker 3: You know, it's nice. That's how she feels about the beer.

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Speaker 4: I think she just thinks there's looks that that suit

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Speaker 4: me better. And the beard is again, it's a means

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Speaker 4: for the running. If I wasn't running in the cold,

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Speaker 4: I probably would have cut along.

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Speaker 1: So wait a minute, you really telling me that this

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Speaker 1: was all a matter of function, not appearance, not vanity,

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Speaker 1: not you only look. Really, I did not know that.

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Speaker 4: My first go around with the beard, that was like

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Speaker 4: a stressed beard where I just had like massive beard

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Speaker 4: right after the show. So that was the function for that.

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Speaker 4: But now it's like I grew it out. I kind

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Speaker 4: of liked it, and it's gotten colder. It's been very

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Speaker 4: easy to run, but now it's it can go robes.

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Speaker 1: Are you hearing this right? It sounds like it might

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Speaker 1: be going soon.

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Speaker 2: I definitely think it's going to be gone soon. I

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Speaker 2: have to say, I do like you clean, shave and

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Speaker 2: better see.

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Speaker 3: I feel like that's most you know those women, Yeah, most.

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Speaker 2: I just wonder about the hygiene involved with the beard.

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Speaker 3: Oh, I have questions, but I don't need them answer.

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Speaker 3: It's okay. I'm looking at them different.

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Speaker 4: Yeah. No, I learned a lot about beard hygiene through

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Speaker 4: my first my first beard, and I didn't know how

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Speaker 4: to take care of it. But now I've got all

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Speaker 4: the grooming done it, I'm washing it, I'm oiling.

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Speaker 3: It just seems like a lot of work.

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Speaker 4: It is a lot of work, but the latter is

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Speaker 4: very unpleasant. So I gotta take care do you get

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Speaker 4: a lot of food in it?

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Speaker 1: And I ask you that because if anybody follows you

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Speaker 1: on Instagram, you are eating I don't know, sixteen hours

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Speaker 1: of the day.

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Speaker 4: Perhaps it's it's honestly, it's that's probably the biggest issue,

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Speaker 4: is someone not telling you that there's something so and

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Speaker 4: it's just disgusting. Like if you've ever been around anybody

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Speaker 4: that has something on their face or in their teeth,

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Speaker 4: Like I'm just walking around with mustard in my beard

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Speaker 4: and everyone just kind of looking at me like, oh

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Speaker 4: my goodness. Yeah, that's things like that. I'm like, man,

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Speaker 4: I'm kind of ready for this to go too.

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Speaker 3: All right, all right, that's exciting. So, by the way,

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Speaker 3: where is your better half?

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Speaker 4: Like most weekends, she is on her way to a wedding. Yes,

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Speaker 4: she's on a weddo wedding. I didn't even know was

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Speaker 4: wedding season. I guess wedding season's three sixty five.

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Speaker 1: Now, yeah, man, she's right in that sweet spot right

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Speaker 1: of age where so many friends from college hitting a

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Speaker 1: certain age and getting married and there's a wedding every

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Speaker 1: single weekend, it seems.

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Speaker 2: How does she feel about going to a wedding without

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Speaker 2: her plus one?

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Speaker 4: That's a great question. There's so many of them that

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Speaker 4: if I went to every single wedding that I would

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Speaker 4: miss out on previous engagements. And I had a lot

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Speaker 4: going on this week in New York. One of those

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Speaker 4: highlights being to come see you all.

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Speaker 3: So wait, don't blame.

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Speaker 4: Us, Sorry, Rachel, what the hell? Hey, hey, Rachel, baby,

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Speaker 4: I'm sorry. This is on TJ and Amy, I was Rachel.

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Speaker 4: We gave him next week as an option to Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Speaking of weddings, how many times do you get

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Speaker 2: that question a day? Oh?

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Speaker 1: Man?

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Speaker 4: It depends on how many people we see. It's constant,

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Speaker 4: but I get it. I mean, we are Our relationship

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Speaker 4: and love was so public and is still so public

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Speaker 4: that everyone has a vested interest in and when that's happening,

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Speaker 4: and I tell most people, and I'll tell y'all, we

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Speaker 4: wouldn't be together if that wasn't the end goal. And

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Speaker 4: the longer we've been together, the more of a reality

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Speaker 4: that is becoming, and especially when we go to weddings

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Speaker 4: together and we start to bounce ideas off each other,

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Speaker 4: we just kind of start to create our own perfect wedding,

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Speaker 4: which is fun. So when we leave places and venues

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Speaker 4: and travel and countries are like, would you want to

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Speaker 4: get married over here? It's like, yeah, do.

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Speaker 3: You have a list of just your thinking destination wedding?

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Speaker 4: What I say doesn't matter, whatever it's going to be

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Speaker 4: wherever and whatever she wants, which is fitting. But I

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Speaker 4: think that a destination wedding would be amazing, and I

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Speaker 4: think that she slow to that idea too, just because

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Speaker 4: we have so many people that we'd want to enjoy

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Speaker 4: that with us, and if you have a destination wedding,

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Speaker 4: it kind of trims it down a little bit. Listen,

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Speaker 4: the weddings are expensive. Weddings are expensive, So it's something

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Speaker 4: that we talk about and it's not something that we're

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Speaker 4: not like having conversations about all.

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Speaker 1: Warm weather destination. Now now I'm not assuming we are

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Speaker 1: going to be on the invite list, but it's a

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Speaker 1: warm weather destination.

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Speaker 4: You all look at it, right? Yeah, for sure?

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Speaker 3: For sure? Definitely no beard, no beard, no beard, no beard.

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Speaker 4: I couldn't get away with the beer for the wedding.

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Speaker 2: I will say, though no one else can see your face.

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Speaker 2: But when you were just talking about it.

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Speaker 3: It was sweet.

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Speaker 2: Your face lit up, there was a warmth, like it

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Speaker 2: was a really cool thing to see how warmly you

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Speaker 2: talk about it. Despite having to constantly talk about it,

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Speaker 2: I can still see it's an exciting thing to look

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Speaker 2: forward to that you're planning and you're developing, and I

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Speaker 2: don't know what. You fell in love in front of everyone.

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Speaker 2: Your entire relationship was exposed in front of everyone. How

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Speaker 2: have you dealt You were a real estate agent before this,

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Speaker 2: how have you dealt with the public pressure of being

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Speaker 2: in a relationship. I mean, yes, people are rooting for you,

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Speaker 2: but what is that like?

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Speaker 4: Oo? I dealt with it very poorly. Initially. You just

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Speaker 4: try to do things to appease people, and that's just

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Speaker 4: a very dangerous path to go on because you can't

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Speaker 4: make anybody happy. It's hard enough to make your partner happy.

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Speaker 4: So like doing things in the consideration of others is

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Speaker 4: just as a non starter. So we started living for

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Speaker 4: each other and we focused on each other and we

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Speaker 4: just stayed out of the nonsense. And I think that's

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Speaker 4: where we thrive, and that's why we're not allowed. That's

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Speaker 4: why we're not around a lot like there's so many

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Speaker 4: things that go on in that reality world and bachelor

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Speaker 4: world that you're pulled into because you know you'll always

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Speaker 4: be a part of it. I'm getting sent stuff daily

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Speaker 4: from people and getting tagged and stuff. But our relationship

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Speaker 4: is strong because we focus on each other.

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Speaker 1: You say focus on each other now, but you use

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Speaker 1: that word appease others outside of the relationship. Where did

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Speaker 1: you find that you were making some missteps and doing

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Speaker 1: something personally or doing something with her or in relation

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Speaker 1: to your relationship that was for somebody outside of the relationship.

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Speaker 4: I think that you take advice from people who aren't married,

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Speaker 4: aren't family, don't know what it means to be in

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Speaker 4: a healthy relationship. So you're taking in all this outside

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Speaker 4: noise that is just noise, and you've got to decipher,

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Speaker 4: like what's the basis of their advice, Like is it

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Speaker 4: selfishly they just want to see a ribbons hide on

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Speaker 4: this experience that they all went through with you, and

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Speaker 4: they're just it's a selfish thing, or they're like they

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Speaker 4: actually want the best for you, and the people that

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Speaker 4: want the best for us have never put pressure on

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Speaker 4: our relationship. And with that type of relationship, to those

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Speaker 4: people were more susceptible to what they have to say

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Speaker 4: because we know they're coming at it from love and

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Speaker 4: from someone who cares about as opposed to someone that

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Speaker 4: just like that really doesn't care. Because there's so much

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Speaker 4: turnover in the franchise that you know there's going to

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Speaker 4: be the next person, the next person, the next person,

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Speaker 4: so that end goal will come to them at some point,

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Speaker 4: and as someone who had been in that situation, you

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Speaker 4: feel the pressure to make that happen. And I'm not

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Speaker 4: gonna call anybody out, but as you've seen over the

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Speaker 4: past couple of seasons, just because the show ends out

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Speaker 4: a certain way doesn't necessarily mean that that relationship is

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Speaker 4: going to withstand the test of time.

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Speaker 2: And conversely, you all had broken up when you were

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Speaker 2: doing the After the Rose the Reunion special. You all

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Speaker 2: weren't together and then look what happened. I guess started

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Speaker 2: backstage and then a month later. Do you feel any

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Speaker 2: public pressure to stay together?

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Speaker 4: I don't think so. I don't think Rachel feels that either.

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Speaker 4: I mean, when you've been together as long as we have,

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Speaker 4: there's love there. You know you can't you could fake something,

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Speaker 4: but for so long and you see it with people

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Speaker 4: who were together. But I think anyone who's been around

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Speaker 4: Rachel and I can tell that we were made for

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Speaker 4: each other. Which is crazy because during the show, you

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Speaker 4: know everything. So you made a point earlier about you

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Speaker 4: and TJ were talking about having learned about couples communicating

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Speaker 4: while watching people communicate on the show. You can't run

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Speaker 4: away from tough conversations like you can in the real world.

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Speaker 4: Like in the real world, if I wasn't going to

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Speaker 4: talk to somebody like back then, I would have just

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Speaker 4: not texted them back and like, I'm sorry, but that's

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Speaker 4: my honest answer, Like I wasn't gonna Hey can we

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Speaker 4: meet up? Hey, I don't think we should be together?

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Speaker 4: Are you okay? Okay, let me walk you out, Like

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Speaker 4: I'm not doing that. I'm like, the easiest way for

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Speaker 4: me to confront that was just to I'm never gonna

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Speaker 4: talk to them again. I'm not saying that was the

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Speaker 4: right way, but like going through those experiences on the

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Speaker 4: show has helped.

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Speaker 2: You had to break up with people, Yeah, to their face,

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Speaker 2: it's the worst and put them in a car.

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Speaker 4: Do we have to relive that?

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Speaker 3: You know what?

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Speaker 1: She makes a good point back to the breaking up.

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Speaker 1: I know bechelation is an enormous nation, and I know

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Speaker 1: you constantly get inundated with things, but do you ever

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Speaker 1: hear from anyone do you continue any friendships from people

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Speaker 1: that were on your season, and even any of them

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Speaker 1: try to give you any advice about what you're doing.

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Speaker 4: You made a very interesting point when you were talking

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Speaker 4: about that connection that you and Rachel Lindsay had just

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Speaker 4: off of the few words you shared before the interview,

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Speaker 4: haven't never met each other, And I think Rachel and

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Speaker 4: I have a similar relationship. Rachel Lindsay, she was the

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Speaker 4: last person I spoke with before they took my phone

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Speaker 4: and before I went out into this like super foreign experience,

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Speaker 4: and she gave me some of the best advice that

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Speaker 4: helped shape the decisions I made during that time. And

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Speaker 4: that was off, that was out of the kindness of

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Speaker 4: her heart, Like we didn't know each other, like she

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Speaker 4: had just seen me on social or like heard through

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Speaker 4: the grapevine. She had a better relationship with the woman

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Speaker 4: who didn't want me on the show than she did

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Speaker 4: with me. And because I was supposed to be on

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Speaker 4: another woman's show who ultimately didn't work out, and so

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Speaker 4: Rachel reached out to me, and I was like, dang,

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Speaker 4: like this is. I spoke with a bunch of different

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Speaker 4: former contestants Bachelor's Batch, mostly Bachelor's. I didn't sach out

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Speaker 4: to any Basarettes, but I had Nick Vaiao reach out.

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Speaker 4: I talked wells. I talked to Ben Higgins, like people

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Speaker 4: who I still look up to and respect, And it

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Speaker 4: was just something different about the Rachel Lindsay conversation, just

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Speaker 4: because she I think she could relate and feel the

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Speaker 4: pressures and the weight of that stage and what it

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Speaker 4: meant for a lot of people. So yeah, me and Rachel,

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Speaker 4: we don't talk every day, but whenever she's in New York,

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Speaker 4: she'll reach out to me. I hosted and mediated her

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Speaker 4: second book conversation, So we have a good relationship.

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Speaker 1: You know, I have to since we're talking about Rachel Lindsay.

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Speaker 1: I think that news has been out there and everybody

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Speaker 1: knows now she is split with the guy she ended

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Speaker 1: up with after her season, her husband that her to

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Speaker 1: be going through divorce proceedings. What is your reaction to,

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Speaker 1: not necessarily just that they broke up, but the reaction

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Speaker 1: that has been out there to her splitting you Being

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Speaker 1: in the unique position you are where people are rooting

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Speaker 1: for you or waiting for you to break up. I

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Speaker 1: want to put a bull on it. I think is

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Speaker 1: how you said it? What do you think about what

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Speaker 1: you're seeing and how people I've reacted to? What was

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Speaker 1: I guess a polarizing couple of in a lot of ways,

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Speaker 1: now splitting after.

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Speaker 4: Four years, I'm heartbroken for I think that a lot

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Speaker 4: of people look at these, you know, reality relationships as

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Speaker 4: you know, is that like it's just a fictional thing

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Speaker 4: and there's real emotions there. They were married, like people

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Speaker 4: forget that they were married.

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Speaker 1: They moved into like move across country.

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Speaker 4: I think that people don't look at the union of

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Speaker 4: marriage the same with those type of people, and they're

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Speaker 4: no different from from anybody else. So, along with an

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Speaker 4: answer to say I was heartbroken for because those it

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Speaker 4: was hard enough to break up with someone that I

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Speaker 4: barely knew on the Bachelor, Like I couldn't imagine having

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Speaker 4: that type of a conversation with someone that you know,

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Speaker 4: you were planning to spend the rest of your life with.

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Speaker 4: So I haven't spoken to her, just out of respect

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Speaker 4: of or her situation, but I've been praying for and

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Speaker 4: it's just sad like I don't want I root for

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Speaker 4: love and you know it's devastating. I can't imagine what

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Speaker 4: they're going through.

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Speaker 1: And can I say to you and you will be

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Speaker 1: on board with this.

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Speaker 3: I was the same way.

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Speaker 1: Rachel and I have been closed for a long time,

404
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Speaker 1: but when everything was going on, my initial reaction was

405
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Speaker 1: to let me hold that, let me give her a beat, and.

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Speaker 4: Just stay out of the way.

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Speaker 3: And then I thought about you.

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Speaker 1: I thought about Montel, I thought about Chuck, I thought

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Speaker 1: about Halle, I thought about Candy, I thought about I

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Speaker 1: thought about all the people when I was going through

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Speaker 1: hell and nobody knew what the hell to say to me.

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Speaker 1: It made a difference that you picked up the phone

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Speaker 1: and sent that message. It made a difference to just

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Speaker 1: get that and I have. I've talked to Rachel since

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Speaker 1: all this went down, and just it means everything when

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Speaker 1: you're going through hell to hear and I know I'm

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Speaker 1: not getting on to you for it, but I know

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Speaker 1: exactly the position you were sitting in, and I assure

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Speaker 1: you she wants to hear from you.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I needed to hear that because I think about

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Speaker 4: it selfishly, I'm like, oh, I need to say something

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Speaker 4: to her, but it's like it's like what is what

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Speaker 4: is she need at this moment? And like what And

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Speaker 4: I saw that she recently posted that she did a

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Speaker 4: girl ship, which I'm through them. I'm super excited for

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Speaker 4: her because you need in that moment the people to

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Speaker 4: come around you. And like you were saying, when you

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Speaker 4: were going through what you were going through, like we

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Speaker 4: at the time, we didn't have the strongest or best

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Speaker 4: relationship just because we hadn't known each other for long,

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Speaker 4: but the way that we first met and interacted, like

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Speaker 4: I just it was something in my spirit that I

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Speaker 4: just looked up to you, like the way that you

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Speaker 4: handled everything that I was going through and our relationship

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Speaker 4: with grace and guidance, and it honestly inspired me to

436
00:21:49,160 --> 00:21:51,520
Speaker 4: want to pursue what you were doing. I wanted to

437
00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:53,440
Speaker 4: be you.

438
00:21:53,480 --> 00:21:54,720
Speaker 3: Do you still want to be him?

439
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:55,639
Speaker 4: I still want.

440
00:21:55,520 --> 00:21:57,200
Speaker 3: To be you can do better?

441
00:21:59,520 --> 00:22:03,160
Speaker 4: So but yeah, no, those those type of conversations met

442
00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:04,879
Speaker 4: more than you know. And there was the ones we

443
00:22:04,920 --> 00:22:06,679
Speaker 4: had on air, and there's a lot of conversations that

444
00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:09,080
Speaker 4: we've had off air and time we spent together that

445
00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:13,120
Speaker 4: no one will ever know about that it meant a lot,

446
00:22:13,920 --> 00:22:14,560
Speaker 4: and it means a lot.

447
00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:16,680
Speaker 1: I was trying to explain this to the Ropes, who

448
00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:19,159
Speaker 1: was obviously a witness to everything going on, But she

449
00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:21,199
Speaker 1: was also a witness to every time I picked up

450
00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:23,119
Speaker 1: the phone and said, Hey, just heard from Matt. Let

451
00:22:23,119 --> 00:22:25,080
Speaker 1: me let you read this, or hey, I got lunch

452
00:22:25,119 --> 00:22:27,640
Speaker 1: with that. I think you were the first person when

453
00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:30,400
Speaker 1: everything went down and shit hit the fan with us.

454
00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:32,960
Speaker 1: You were the first person outside of Robot that I

455
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:36,840
Speaker 1: set foot out with publicly. We went to had Mexican

456
00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:38,280
Speaker 1: a couple of times in the spot and try it

457
00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:42,879
Speaker 1: beca We went for a run. But to your point,

458
00:22:43,480 --> 00:22:46,399
Speaker 1: you don't realize. I guess we switched positions here in

459
00:22:46,440 --> 00:22:48,639
Speaker 1: a lot of ways. And you I will inundate you

460
00:22:48,680 --> 00:22:50,239
Speaker 1: with text now if I don't hear from you how

461
00:22:50,240 --> 00:22:52,280
Speaker 1: you do the hell with it? Brother, I'm gonna keep

462
00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:54,679
Speaker 1: coming at you until you let me know you okay,

463
00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:57,400
Speaker 1: But you were the one, and that time you were

464
00:22:57,440 --> 00:22:59,960
Speaker 1: one of those who wouldn't give up on me, who

465
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:03,680
Speaker 1: wouldn't let me crawl on draw a rock and bro

466
00:23:03,720 --> 00:23:06,760
Speaker 1: while you know this, how many you know that handful

467
00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:09,919
Speaker 1: of guys that meant everything to me? And you know

468
00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:12,960
Speaker 1: one of them you were hearing about because this dude's sitting.

469
00:23:12,840 --> 00:23:14,400
Speaker 2: Right here right I was going to tell you, Matt,

470
00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:17,320
Speaker 2: you may not realizing it sounds like you don't just

471
00:23:17,359 --> 00:23:20,400
Speaker 2: how much you meant to TJ during this past year.

472
00:23:20,520 --> 00:23:25,440
Speaker 2: It was a huge source of comfort to know that

473
00:23:25,800 --> 00:23:28,119
Speaker 2: someone cared and someone got it. I think, you know

474
00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:32,119
Speaker 2: that's and I love what you just said about how

475
00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:35,280
Speaker 2: I think a lot of people watch these types of shows,

476
00:23:35,359 --> 00:23:37,840
Speaker 2: or watch anyone who's on television or in the public eye,

477
00:23:37,840 --> 00:23:42,159
Speaker 2: and somehow think that they are insulated from pain or

478
00:23:42,240 --> 00:23:43,840
Speaker 2: insulated from.

479
00:23:45,160 --> 00:23:48,200
Speaker 3: Trauma. And it's actually.

480
00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:50,880
Speaker 2: Amplified in a lot of ways, because everyone going through

481
00:23:50,880 --> 00:23:53,120
Speaker 2: something private, whether it be a divorce or any sort

482
00:23:53,119 --> 00:23:55,680
Speaker 2: of breakup or any sort of controversy, is painful enough,

483
00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:58,040
Speaker 2: but to have it amplified and the pressure of that

484
00:23:58,240 --> 00:24:01,000
Speaker 2: is even more so. You know, I know that you

485
00:24:01,080 --> 00:24:05,520
Speaker 2: get it, and people, I think sometimes forget it, or

486
00:24:05,560 --> 00:24:08,800
Speaker 2: sometimes they just believe that somehow there's so many other

487
00:24:08,840 --> 00:24:10,840
Speaker 2: great things going on in your life that this doesn't

488
00:24:10,880 --> 00:24:14,399
Speaker 2: mean as much. You know, relationships and you know, the

489
00:24:14,480 --> 00:24:16,480
Speaker 2: ups and downs and all rounds of them are probably

490
00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:18,280
Speaker 2: the thing that impacts all of us the most.

491
00:24:18,040 --> 00:24:18,520
Speaker 3: In our lives.

492
00:24:18,520 --> 00:24:21,480
Speaker 2: That's why the Bachelor probably is such a phenomenon because

493
00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:23,080
Speaker 2: we all get it, we all relate to it to

494
00:24:23,119 --> 00:24:23,680
Speaker 2: an extent.

495
00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:25,720
Speaker 3: And I know that in.

496
00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:31,159
Speaker 2: Your season you were the first black Bachelor, and so

497
00:24:31,320 --> 00:24:33,680
Speaker 2: race obviously was going to be a part of it.

498
00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:37,080
Speaker 2: But race played a role that you probably couldn't have

499
00:24:37,119 --> 00:24:41,359
Speaker 2: even imagined ultimately. And I'm curious today because obviously TJ

500
00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:43,520
Speaker 2: and I live this to an extent in terms of

501
00:24:43,560 --> 00:24:46,919
Speaker 2: your relationship and how you all interact and connect or

502
00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:49,240
Speaker 2: perhaps don't see things the same way or need to

503
00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:52,920
Speaker 2: be reminded of or educated or re educated about things

504
00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:55,239
Speaker 2: on black and white issues, like how much of that

505
00:24:55,440 --> 00:24:57,080
Speaker 2: is a part of your relationship?

506
00:24:57,600 --> 00:25:00,439
Speaker 4: You know what? There was a time where as the

507
00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:04,640
Speaker 4: show was airing, Uh, it seemed like where our country

508
00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:07,359
Speaker 4: was at the time, no one wanted our relationship to work.

509
00:25:07,760 --> 00:25:12,000
Speaker 4: And the things that humanized my relationship with Rachel, like

510
00:25:12,040 --> 00:25:16,760
Speaker 4: you were saying, people saw us as people on TV

511
00:25:16,920 --> 00:25:23,800
Speaker 4: and not humans. And I lived in TJ's neighborhood and

512
00:25:24,040 --> 00:25:30,240
Speaker 4: I would see TJ in what's it called the Seaport,

513
00:25:30,280 --> 00:25:33,160
Speaker 4: I would see the CJ, I'd see see I'd see TJ.

514
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:37,359
Speaker 4: And the seaport walking to go get lunch with his

515
00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:41,679
Speaker 4: beautiful daughter, and I was like, damn, I was like,

516
00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:44,600
Speaker 4: I want that. It's a beautiful daughter. I was like,

517
00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:47,679
Speaker 4: I want that family. And I'd see TJ running and

518
00:25:48,000 --> 00:25:50,120
Speaker 4: and I had these interactions with people that I looked

519
00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:54,320
Speaker 4: up to who had things that I wanted, and I

520
00:25:54,359 --> 00:25:59,480
Speaker 4: saw it again for myself and I had those confirmation

521
00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:04,000
Speaker 4: I had those confirmations affirmed, and I had those conversations

522
00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:06,119
Speaker 4: with Rachel about you know, people who had done it

523
00:26:06,119 --> 00:26:08,840
Speaker 4: before us, and it was encouraging to see that it

524
00:26:08,920 --> 00:26:12,520
Speaker 4: wasn't something that was foreign and shouldn't be foreign at

525
00:26:12,640 --> 00:26:16,880
Speaker 4: you know, twenty twenty two. But it just took us

526
00:26:17,119 --> 00:26:20,000
Speaker 4: taking time to really get to know each other. Because

527
00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:22,560
Speaker 4: what a lot of people don't understand is when you

528
00:26:22,600 --> 00:26:28,479
Speaker 4: go on a show like that, yeah it's eight weeks,

529
00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:33,160
Speaker 4: but the actual time, like the literal time you spend

530
00:26:33,160 --> 00:26:36,399
Speaker 4: with that person could be quantified in hours. So like

531
00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:40,760
Speaker 4: I had spent maybe seven hours with this woman that

532
00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:44,240
Speaker 4: people wanted me to, you know, propose to, And when

533
00:26:44,280 --> 00:26:46,000
Speaker 4: you think about it like that, it's like that's the

534
00:26:46,080 --> 00:26:49,560
Speaker 4: ultimate speed dating, you know. So it's just we just

535
00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:53,360
Speaker 4: went about things a different way and we're still here,

536
00:26:53,520 --> 00:26:56,119
Speaker 4: we're together, and a lot of people can't say that.

537
00:26:56,240 --> 00:27:03,000
Speaker 4: Who you know, rush that process, and we're not rushing things.

538
00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:06,119
Speaker 1: So married at first sight wouldn't be your jam. That

539
00:27:06,160 --> 00:27:08,320
Speaker 1: shows what you wouldn't do it though.

540
00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:15,160
Speaker 3: Listen, listen what we did. It's basically what we did. Okay,

541
00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:18,639
Speaker 3: you got seven hours.

542
00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:21,359
Speaker 4: It's basically what we did. And I said I would.

543
00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:26,000
Speaker 4: I paused because I'm so like, my relationship is is perfect,

544
00:27:26,040 --> 00:27:27,879
Speaker 4: and I wouldn't want to I wouldn't want to go

545
00:27:27,920 --> 00:27:30,600
Speaker 4: out of out of the relationship that I'm in. But

546
00:27:31,840 --> 00:27:34,240
Speaker 4: I was. I wasn't familiar with that show until recently

547
00:27:34,280 --> 00:27:38,320
Speaker 4: when Rachel showed me. Rachel showed me a video that

548
00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:42,280
Speaker 4: is the funniest video I may have ever seen in

549
00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:45,240
Speaker 4: my entire life. I share a little snippet of it

550
00:27:45,280 --> 00:27:49,200
Speaker 4: with you. Video. It's this guy's talking to the lady

551
00:27:49,200 --> 00:27:51,639
Speaker 4: that he just married or is about to marry, and

552
00:27:52,680 --> 00:27:54,679
Speaker 4: he goes, I'm gonna watch this, but you can go

553
00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:59,960
Speaker 4: look it up. And he's like the lady that he's

554
00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:02,800
Speaker 4: speaking with, she's like, oh, this is a pretty view.

555
00:28:03,760 --> 00:28:06,040
Speaker 4: And then he looks at her and he says, you're

556
00:28:06,119 --> 00:28:08,639
Speaker 4: my prettiest view. And then she looks at him and

557
00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:14,080
Speaker 4: she goes, eh, I just died laughing. We have to

558
00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:15,119
Speaker 4: cue that video.

559
00:28:14,880 --> 00:28:17,520
Speaker 3: For this, But I was just gonna season.

560
00:28:17,720 --> 00:28:20,520
Speaker 4: Does anyone you haven't seen Oh.

561
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:25,280
Speaker 3: No, nor first. We just watched my most recent.

562
00:28:25,240 --> 00:28:28,480
Speaker 4: It might be ninety day Fiance. Yes, I like to view.

563
00:28:28,560 --> 00:28:32,480
Speaker 4: And he's like, you're my best view and she's like, eh,

564
00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:35,360
Speaker 4: we haven't done that. You gotta watch that. So I'm

565
00:28:35,359 --> 00:28:37,560
Speaker 4: getting confused. I've seen ninety day Fiance. I haven't seen

566
00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:41,440
Speaker 4: Love of Mary first. No, I've never seen that Mary

567
00:28:41,440 --> 00:28:41,840
Speaker 4: at first sight.

568
00:28:41,960 --> 00:28:45,680
Speaker 2: Please please, you meet the person you're going to marry

569
00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:49,640
Speaker 2: when you're standing at the altar with the efficient ready

570
00:28:49,680 --> 00:28:52,240
Speaker 2: to go. Your family is there, your friends are there,

571
00:28:52,440 --> 00:28:55,960
Speaker 2: and you've trusted the producers who have used this algorithm

572
00:28:56,240 --> 00:28:59,479
Speaker 2: to put together Apparently you're perfect match on paper, and

573
00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:03,280
Speaker 2: you anually, legitimately legally get married.

574
00:29:03,080 --> 00:29:04,760
Speaker 3: On the spot that moment, you don't have a.

575
00:29:04,760 --> 00:29:06,880
Speaker 2: Choice, and you get married, and then you have eight

576
00:29:06,920 --> 00:29:08,960
Speaker 2: weeks to figure out if you're going to stay married

577
00:29:09,120 --> 00:29:11,160
Speaker 2: or you actually have to end up getting divorced.

578
00:29:11,200 --> 00:29:12,240
Speaker 3: It's decision day.

579
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,600
Speaker 4: Yes, this is a real Yes.

580
00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:17,480
Speaker 3: It's nuts. It's The Bachelor on steroids.

581
00:29:17,520 --> 00:29:20,920
Speaker 4: Wow, I need to watch this. Yes, it's always nice.

582
00:29:20,960 --> 00:29:24,080
Speaker 4: I always tell people this who ask about our relationship.

583
00:29:24,440 --> 00:29:26,200
Speaker 4: I'm like, it's always nice to see someone else go

584
00:29:26,280 --> 00:29:28,440
Speaker 4: through it, Like, well, it's not your drama. So like

585
00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:31,440
Speaker 4: people who are so enamored by, you know, everyone else's stuff.

586
00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:33,560
Speaker 4: Now it looks like I can take part of that.

587
00:29:33,840 --> 00:29:34,560
Speaker 3: Yeah.

588
00:29:34,680 --> 00:29:35,400
Speaker 4: Love at first sight.

589
00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:38,040
Speaker 1: Wow, look you you threw in the word perfect a

590
00:29:38,040 --> 00:29:40,680
Speaker 1: second ago. I knew what you were saying. You said

591
00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:43,360
Speaker 1: you OL's relationship is perfect. Obviously nobody's is, but you

592
00:29:43,360 --> 00:29:44,760
Speaker 1: were making a point there. But I do want to

593
00:29:44,760 --> 00:29:46,640
Speaker 1: go back to the word perfect to where we look

594
00:29:46,960 --> 00:29:49,960
Speaker 1: from the outside. If anybody follow listens to you here,

595
00:29:50,240 --> 00:29:53,760
Speaker 1: it follows you on Instagram. Yes, everything does look and

596
00:29:53,800 --> 00:29:57,200
Speaker 1: appear perfect. You seeing me going through the seaport, smiling

597
00:29:57,320 --> 00:30:00,280
Speaker 1: daughter with me, everything looks perfect. There was some hell

598
00:30:00,360 --> 00:30:04,600
Speaker 1: going on in my life at the time. You what

599
00:30:04,920 --> 00:30:08,200
Speaker 1: is the hell right? What is it we don't see

600
00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:10,600
Speaker 1: to where yes, it's perfect and you can have a

601
00:30:10,640 --> 00:30:15,280
Speaker 1: wonderful relationship, But when are the moments that it's not perfect?

602
00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:17,400
Speaker 1: What are the moments that aren't perfect? Are they just

603
00:30:17,480 --> 00:30:18,840
Speaker 1: normal moments like the rest of us.

604
00:30:18,800 --> 00:30:22,960
Speaker 4: Have in relationships. You know, that's a good question. There

605
00:30:23,040 --> 00:30:25,200
Speaker 4: was a there was like a few months ago where

606
00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:28,200
Speaker 4: I was like, I was thinking to myself, I'm like,

607
00:30:28,840 --> 00:30:31,960
Speaker 4: how do I engage with my audience more so they

608
00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:34,560
Speaker 4: have a more holistic view of our relationship. And I

609
00:30:34,600 --> 00:30:37,000
Speaker 4: was like, I'm gonna film like us getting into a fight.

610
00:30:37,760 --> 00:30:40,200
Speaker 4: And it wasn't like like I wasn't gonna like pick

611
00:30:40,200 --> 00:30:43,760
Speaker 4: a fight where it's like that would have been easy,

612
00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:45,720
Speaker 4: Like I could have left all the all the I

613
00:30:45,720 --> 00:30:49,000
Speaker 4: could have left all the cabinets opened, or the refrigerator

614
00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:54,040
Speaker 4: cracked like done. Stuff that like annoys her. But I

615
00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:56,480
Speaker 4: didn't get around to that. I still might film one.

616
00:30:56,600 --> 00:31:01,960
Speaker 4: But we actually got into an argument yesterday and it

617
00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:04,480
Speaker 4: was so dumb. It usually is. It's always the it's

618
00:31:04,560 --> 00:31:06,160
Speaker 4: the always the dumbest stuff.

619
00:31:06,240 --> 00:31:08,880
Speaker 1: So you probably got a good relationship your relationship if

620
00:31:08,880 --> 00:31:11,840
Speaker 1: it's petty little stuff that is not even worth talking about,

621
00:31:11,840 --> 00:31:13,800
Speaker 1: and you're probably doing pretty well. It was so dumb,

622
00:31:14,080 --> 00:31:14,920
Speaker 1: and what was it about.

623
00:31:14,960 --> 00:31:15,360
Speaker 3: I want to know.

624
00:31:15,480 --> 00:31:22,560
Speaker 4: I'll tell you it's it's so dumb. I hadn't gotten back.

625
00:31:25,440 --> 00:31:27,880
Speaker 4: Let me let me rephrase this, Let me rephrase this,

626
00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:30,720
Speaker 4: let me rephrase this. It wasn't something worth getting that

627
00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:33,520
Speaker 4: upset about. It wasn't dumb, but it was like it

628
00:31:33,560 --> 00:31:35,520
Speaker 4: was dumb. It was dumb on my part. You got upset,

629
00:31:35,600 --> 00:31:38,320
Speaker 4: not her. I got upset. Okay, So so I had

630
00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:42,720
Speaker 4: a long morning. Obviously I worked so hard and he's

631
00:31:42,760 --> 00:31:44,040
Speaker 4: a prefacing everything.

632
00:31:45,680 --> 00:31:47,360
Speaker 1: I was tired, just so you know, I was tired,

633
00:31:50,600 --> 00:31:51,760
Speaker 1: bust in my tail.

634
00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:55,600
Speaker 4: To bring food home for the yes and I call

635
00:31:55,760 --> 00:31:57,560
Speaker 4: Rachel lunch because I just like want to hear a

636
00:31:57,680 --> 00:31:59,960
Speaker 4: voice and just like hear this like fresh breath of air,

637
00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:03,760
Speaker 4: like just like put me at ease. And I called her.

638
00:32:03,760 --> 00:32:05,800
Speaker 4: I was like, hey, babe, She's like, Matt, you haven't

639
00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:08,120
Speaker 4: given us the food for the wedding yet. Are you

640
00:32:08,200 --> 00:32:11,080
Speaker 4: going to give Michael's? Are you going to give Michael

641
00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:12,560
Speaker 4: the dish you need? Is it a veget And she

642
00:32:12,680 --> 00:32:14,720
Speaker 4: just started going on this thing that I hadn't done.

643
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:16,960
Speaker 4: I should have done this a long time ago. And

644
00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:18,600
Speaker 4: it was the last thing I was trying to hear.

645
00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:22,200
Speaker 4: And I was like, are you serious, Like you're not

646
00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:24,720
Speaker 4: going to ask how my day was like? And we

647
00:32:24,800 --> 00:32:27,640
Speaker 4: just like got into this like spat back and forth,

648
00:32:27,880 --> 00:32:29,720
Speaker 4: and I hung up and I was like I was like,

649
00:32:29,760 --> 00:32:31,280
Speaker 4: i'll call you back later, like I can't talk to

650
00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:33,640
Speaker 4: you right now. And I was walking to go get

651
00:32:33,640 --> 00:32:37,040
Speaker 4: a cookie and uh and I opened the door and

652
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:39,560
Speaker 4: I smelled the cookies and I was like, it's like

653
00:32:39,560 --> 00:32:41,840
Speaker 4: what am I doing? And I called her back and

654
00:32:41,880 --> 00:32:44,320
Speaker 4: she's like like sniffle and I'm like, I'm my baby,

655
00:32:44,320 --> 00:32:50,040
Speaker 4: I'm sorry. She's like she's like I forgive you and

656
00:32:50,120 --> 00:32:52,440
Speaker 4: like and she's just like so loving and understanding in

657
00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:54,520
Speaker 4: that moment that like it was it was so dumb

658
00:32:54,600 --> 00:32:58,600
Speaker 4: and like, thank goodness. That's the extent of like our

659
00:32:58,760 --> 00:33:01,440
Speaker 4: our fights. Like there aren't like any major blow ups

660
00:33:01,560 --> 00:33:04,240
Speaker 4: or like any controversial things we've like gone at it about,

661
00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:08,680
Speaker 4: but just the I think the moral of that story

662
00:33:08,760 --> 00:33:12,200
Speaker 4: is we both have an understanding of like what is

663
00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:15,320
Speaker 4: and isn't silly and when something isn't worth, you know,

664
00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:18,360
Speaker 4: going to war over. She's the first to call me

665
00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:20,920
Speaker 4: and apologize, and I'll do the same and I apologize.

666
00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:26,320
Speaker 4: But yeah, that's the things she don't see.

667
00:33:31,640 --> 00:33:33,360
Speaker 1: Okay, Rose, we got to get this out. After hearing

668
00:33:33,400 --> 00:33:36,400
Speaker 1: that story, I'm curious for you, what is your first

669
00:33:36,520 --> 00:33:38,680
Speaker 1: question to him? As a follow up, And I'll tell

670
00:33:38,680 --> 00:33:40,600
Speaker 1: you what mine is after hearing that story, what is

671
00:33:40,640 --> 00:33:41,080
Speaker 1: your question?

672
00:33:41,200 --> 00:33:43,560
Speaker 2: Oh, so I was going back because you can put

673
00:33:43,560 --> 00:33:46,120
Speaker 2: it into perspective. My thought was, how much of what

674
00:33:46,320 --> 00:33:49,479
Speaker 2: you what you went through with the public scrutiny, all

675
00:33:49,560 --> 00:33:52,360
Speaker 2: the controversy, kind of having to hide out. We've talked

676
00:33:52,360 --> 00:33:54,880
Speaker 2: about this from the cameras, from the press, how much

677
00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:57,840
Speaker 2: of going through something that actually was serious, that actually

678
00:33:58,280 --> 00:34:01,040
Speaker 2: was really difficult gave you the expect to be able

679
00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:04,120
Speaker 2: to brush off something that could fester, that could look

680
00:34:04,200 --> 00:34:05,840
Speaker 2: to say, you know what, this isn't that big of

681
00:34:05,880 --> 00:34:06,240
Speaker 2: a deal.

682
00:34:06,400 --> 00:34:08,680
Speaker 1: So yeah, my question was how long did it take

683
00:34:08,719 --> 00:34:10,239
Speaker 1: for you when you hung up the call her back?

684
00:34:10,680 --> 00:34:15,440
Speaker 4: Those those are two incredible questions. I'm gonna answer Amy's first.

685
00:34:17,360 --> 00:34:20,560
Speaker 4: And it's funny you say that, Amy, because Rachel has

686
00:34:20,719 --> 00:34:25,359
Speaker 4: literally said that to to me when we've gone when

687
00:34:25,400 --> 00:34:28,080
Speaker 4: we've gone at it over something ridiculous, like we're just

688
00:34:28,120 --> 00:34:30,200
Speaker 4: sitting there on the couch and she's like, like, I

689
00:34:30,239 --> 00:34:32,480
Speaker 4: can't believe we're arguing over this after everything we've been through.

690
00:34:32,520 --> 00:34:34,920
Speaker 4: I'm like, you're right, Like I'm I'm sorry, I'm sorry,

691
00:34:35,000 --> 00:34:40,239
Speaker 4: and like it's that amlicable. It's it really when you

692
00:34:40,400 --> 00:34:43,800
Speaker 4: face the toughest adversity at the rip and off the

693
00:34:43,840 --> 00:34:47,319
Speaker 4: peak and at the beginning of your relationship. I mean,

694
00:34:48,280 --> 00:34:51,319
Speaker 4: you can get through anything, which is comforting to know

695
00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:54,600
Speaker 4: that you know you have someone who will stick by

696
00:34:54,640 --> 00:34:58,560
Speaker 4: you through you know, the ups and downs, not that

697
00:34:58,600 --> 00:35:02,280
Speaker 4: there won't be more, but just that it's battle tested.

698
00:35:02,760 --> 00:35:07,439
Speaker 4: So yeah, that was that is like our our north star.

699
00:35:07,560 --> 00:35:10,279
Speaker 4: It's like, it's like we've gotten through this, Like, let's

700
00:35:10,680 --> 00:35:12,799
Speaker 4: that's our grounding moment. It's like we've if we've made

701
00:35:12,800 --> 00:35:15,400
Speaker 4: it through everything else, then this is this is nothing

702
00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:17,800
Speaker 4: close to that. So let's just I'm like, you're right, baby.

703
00:35:17,920 --> 00:35:20,000
Speaker 3: The storm came early, and it came fast.

704
00:35:20,040 --> 00:35:23,480
Speaker 4: Storm came early and fast. And to answer to TJ's

705
00:35:23,520 --> 00:35:28,280
Speaker 4: question about how quickly I called her back, probably forty

706
00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:28,920
Speaker 4: five seconds.

707
00:35:29,040 --> 00:35:31,279
Speaker 3: Oh wow, yeah, I'll tell you were gonna say forty

708
00:35:31,320 --> 00:35:31,800
Speaker 3: five minutes.

709
00:35:31,920 --> 00:35:35,000
Speaker 4: No, No, I wouldn't let it faster that long. Yeah,

710
00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:37,280
Speaker 4: I was like, I hung up. I just needed a second,

711
00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:40,759
Speaker 4: and I was just like, and it's it's typically how

712
00:35:40,800 --> 00:35:43,440
Speaker 4: it goes with us, Like before you say something dumb

713
00:35:44,440 --> 00:35:46,520
Speaker 4: either way, it's like you're gonna hang up and just

714
00:35:46,520 --> 00:35:49,239
Speaker 4: take a second to collect your thought. And then call back.

715
00:35:49,280 --> 00:35:51,359
Speaker 4: It's usually yeah, So I knew I was in the wrong,

716
00:35:51,400 --> 00:35:54,360
Speaker 4: so I called back, and I'm like, tail between my legs, baby,

717
00:35:54,360 --> 00:35:56,759
Speaker 4: I'm sorry. I didn't I didn't mean. I'll take the

718
00:35:57,000 --> 00:35:57,720
Speaker 4: go ahead, salmon.

719
00:35:57,880 --> 00:36:00,479
Speaker 3: You dying to say something? No, I'm not. I don't

720
00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:04,160
Speaker 3: need to point anything out. No, no, no, no. Then I'll

721
00:36:04,440 --> 00:36:04,960
Speaker 3: point this out.

722
00:36:07,160 --> 00:36:10,960
Speaker 1: I get that, like I, when you're in the wrong,

723
00:36:12,000 --> 00:36:14,480
Speaker 1: you've got to jump on it in that moment. I

724
00:36:14,480 --> 00:36:17,839
Speaker 1: think most fights and things take place and there it's

725
00:36:17,880 --> 00:36:21,240
Speaker 1: never really about what happened. It's how you handle what happened.

726
00:36:21,239 --> 00:36:23,640
Speaker 1: That's the fact that ends up being the problem. And

727
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:27,880
Speaker 1: so no, that's and to your point about recording an argument,

728
00:36:29,280 --> 00:36:31,560
Speaker 1: I don't know ropes so we recommend that or not.

729
00:36:33,160 --> 00:36:35,879
Speaker 2: I mean, so we did a couple of weeks ago,

730
00:36:36,120 --> 00:36:39,520
Speaker 2: and people fell on either side of the fence on

731
00:36:39,680 --> 00:36:41,759
Speaker 2: whether or not we should have. But I look back

732
00:36:41,800 --> 00:36:43,960
Speaker 2: at it and I learned a lot from it, So

733
00:36:44,360 --> 00:36:46,040
Speaker 2: I don't know that I would recommend it to anyone.

734
00:36:46,080 --> 00:36:48,520
Speaker 2: You have to be personally willing to re listen to

735
00:36:48,560 --> 00:36:51,160
Speaker 2: yourself and to hear things differently, and that is part

736
00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:55,360
Speaker 2: of the process. I actually personally am very glad for me.

737
00:36:55,480 --> 00:36:58,080
Speaker 2: I think it actually was a moment. I feel like

738
00:36:58,120 --> 00:37:02,080
Speaker 2: a different person afterwards now, I really do so for me,

739
00:37:02,480 --> 00:37:05,720
Speaker 2: it was actually helpful, but it came with a price

740
00:37:05,760 --> 00:37:06,680
Speaker 2: because people weigh in.

741
00:37:06,760 --> 00:37:09,200
Speaker 3: You know, that's the thing. You know, you're you don't

742
00:37:09,200 --> 00:37:09,919
Speaker 3: want to put on.

743
00:37:09,840 --> 00:37:15,359
Speaker 2: This perception of having some perfect relationship, and there is

744
00:37:15,400 --> 00:37:18,440
Speaker 2: something about knowing you're not alone and it is relatable.

745
00:37:18,440 --> 00:37:20,719
Speaker 2: And no matter who you are, no matter where you live,

746
00:37:20,800 --> 00:37:23,480
Speaker 2: or how much money you make, or what your circumstances are,

747
00:37:23,480 --> 00:37:26,239
Speaker 2: we all still come down to the same basic things.

748
00:37:26,239 --> 00:37:28,280
Speaker 2: We want to feel loved, we want to feel safe,

749
00:37:28,520 --> 00:37:31,120
Speaker 2: we want to feel heard, we want to feel understood.

750
00:37:31,160 --> 00:37:33,560
Speaker 2: So I do think that that there is real value

751
00:37:33,560 --> 00:37:38,759
Speaker 2: in understanding that and knowing that everyone's in the same place, genuinely.

752
00:37:38,840 --> 00:37:40,560
Speaker 1: But we were letting you know from where we were

753
00:37:40,560 --> 00:37:43,120
Speaker 1: at the time. She didn't know it was about to happen.

754
00:37:43,160 --> 00:37:45,720
Speaker 1: We were in a whatever little beef and she wasn't

755
00:37:45,760 --> 00:37:47,640
Speaker 1: with me at the house and I just set up

756
00:37:47,680 --> 00:37:50,640
Speaker 1: the microphones. She came over and I said, hey, let's

757
00:37:50,680 --> 00:37:52,560
Speaker 1: just talk it out and see what happens. And we

758
00:37:52,640 --> 00:37:55,319
Speaker 1: had days to decide whether or not to put it

759
00:37:55,360 --> 00:37:57,200
Speaker 1: out there, and so we had to go back and

760
00:37:57,239 --> 00:37:59,920
Speaker 1: listen to ourselves fight like five times.

761
00:38:01,600 --> 00:38:02,000
Speaker 3: It's tough.

762
00:38:02,080 --> 00:38:06,120
Speaker 1: It spawned more difficult conversations and fights, and a big

763
00:38:06,160 --> 00:38:08,320
Speaker 1: part of the had did have to do with race.

764
00:38:08,760 --> 00:38:10,719
Speaker 1: It did have to do with not seeing eye to

765
00:38:10,719 --> 00:38:13,279
Speaker 1: eye on some things, or how something could be perceived

766
00:38:13,719 --> 00:38:16,799
Speaker 1: coming from a black man talking to a white woman

767
00:38:16,880 --> 00:38:19,400
Speaker 1: or a white woman talking to a black man. Now, privately,

768
00:38:20,040 --> 00:38:22,799
Speaker 1: there's no issue, but then once you hear it laid

769
00:38:22,840 --> 00:38:24,319
Speaker 1: out and you put it out there for people to hear.

770
00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:26,280
Speaker 1: So I think when she was asking you earlier about

771
00:38:26,280 --> 00:38:30,880
Speaker 1: how race ever plays into it, winn in your private moments,

772
00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:33,680
Speaker 1: does she have a moment where she needs to be

773
00:38:33,760 --> 00:38:36,680
Speaker 1: And I don't want this sound the wrong way, but educated,

774
00:38:36,680 --> 00:38:40,000
Speaker 1: almost unaware of or doesn't know how to handle something

775
00:38:40,040 --> 00:38:43,040
Speaker 1: related to you as a black man, your culture, your upbringing,

776
00:38:43,120 --> 00:38:45,919
Speaker 1: your way of seeing the world. How often do those

777
00:38:45,960 --> 00:38:50,359
Speaker 1: things in the way the world suits you, do those

778
00:38:50,440 --> 00:38:51,279
Speaker 1: things come up?

779
00:38:52,640 --> 00:38:56,120
Speaker 4: I mean, to be honest with y'all, we're so fortunate

780
00:38:56,239 --> 00:39:02,160
Speaker 4: that and I say this from like the highest level

781
00:39:02,200 --> 00:39:05,480
Speaker 4: of level of privilege, Like I am so fortunate that

782
00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:11,360
Speaker 4: a majority of my interactions with people, are interactions with people,

783
00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:19,360
Speaker 4: We're not having those type of extreme racial reactions to

784
00:39:19,840 --> 00:39:23,879
Speaker 4: our relationship to I'm trying to think of the best

785
00:39:23,880 --> 00:39:28,879
Speaker 4: way to answer this, because there have been moments I'm

786
00:39:28,920 --> 00:39:29,560
Speaker 4: just trying to think of.

787
00:39:30,040 --> 00:39:31,880
Speaker 1: So I'll give you and while you are thinking to

788
00:39:32,040 --> 00:39:34,160
Speaker 1: give me an idea, and it robs you, like this

789
00:39:34,200 --> 00:39:36,680
Speaker 1: is something that didn't come about because of us, but

790
00:39:36,760 --> 00:39:39,680
Speaker 1: we happen to be around someone who, right, a group

791
00:39:39,719 --> 00:39:44,840
Speaker 1: of folks who someone a white person says something about

792
00:39:45,200 --> 00:39:48,520
Speaker 1: black culture, says something about black folks, makes a reference

793
00:39:48,560 --> 00:39:51,839
Speaker 1: to something in the way to where it now her

794
00:39:51,960 --> 00:39:54,120
Speaker 1: ear to where everybody in the room who might be

795
00:39:54,160 --> 00:39:56,760
Speaker 1: all be white, they look and they listen, they're laughing

796
00:39:56,880 --> 00:40:00,759
Speaker 1: or chiming in, and I'm like this with my arms

797
00:40:00,400 --> 00:40:06,040
Speaker 1: just listening. She now can hear what was just said

798
00:40:06,080 --> 00:40:09,239
Speaker 1: and understand why it came into my ear and would

799
00:40:09,280 --> 00:40:12,760
Speaker 1: have been interpreted differently to where and again, no offense

800
00:40:12,800 --> 00:40:15,440
Speaker 1: to you, right, you didn't do anything wrong, but she

801
00:40:15,760 --> 00:40:20,319
Speaker 1: didn't understand why I might be offended by the way

802
00:40:20,360 --> 00:40:23,040
Speaker 1: the world is seeing me and not respecting me, or

803
00:40:23,080 --> 00:40:26,600
Speaker 1: not appreciate it, not being considered at all. Those types

804
00:40:26,640 --> 00:40:29,200
Speaker 1: of things do rear their heads every now and again

805
00:40:29,280 --> 00:40:31,799
Speaker 1: with us. Doesn't call a rift between us, Oh no, no, no.

806
00:40:32,080 --> 00:40:35,080
Speaker 2: But I would say that I just so where I

807
00:40:35,120 --> 00:40:38,080
Speaker 2: think what you're specifically referencing is a lot of people,

808
00:40:38,160 --> 00:40:40,239
Speaker 2: in an effort they come from maybe a good place,

809
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:44,480
Speaker 2: trying to connect or relate to the black experience. It's

810
00:40:44,480 --> 00:40:49,080
Speaker 2: offensive because they can't. And so seeing people desperately try

811
00:40:49,160 --> 00:40:52,040
Speaker 2: to connect or relate and so being offensive in a

812
00:40:52,080 --> 00:40:57,440
Speaker 2: way that I wouldn't have necessarily realized before hit it.

813
00:40:57,560 --> 00:41:00,160
Speaker 4: That hit well, not for me personally, but I've seen it, Like,

814
00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:02,200
Speaker 4: I see so much of it because like people so

815
00:41:02,320 --> 00:41:05,080
Speaker 4: much want to be like I feel you, but like

816
00:41:05,160 --> 00:41:08,000
Speaker 4: there's other ways to like, you know, support that cause

817
00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:11,719
Speaker 4: then to like, you know, try to draw to an

818
00:41:11,719 --> 00:41:16,600
Speaker 4: experience that you might not you know, be able to represent. Yeah,

819
00:41:16,719 --> 00:41:19,560
Speaker 4: but I would say to answer your question, and again

820
00:41:19,640 --> 00:41:22,560
Speaker 4: this is like coming from the biggest area of privilege,

821
00:41:22,680 --> 00:41:28,080
Speaker 4: is like if we're going to dinner or we're going uh,

822
00:41:28,840 --> 00:41:33,200
Speaker 4: if if we're at the airport and I think that

823
00:41:34,280 --> 00:41:37,239
Speaker 4: me going up to this individual is gonna warrant a

824
00:41:37,280 --> 00:41:39,680
Speaker 4: negative response, then all of a sudden, Rachel m h.

825
00:41:40,200 --> 00:41:42,359
Speaker 4: And I'll be like like and I know, like, that's

826
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:43,879
Speaker 4: that's how that's just how it goes, like.

827
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:46,479
Speaker 1: No, because we have all at some point in your life.

828
00:41:46,480 --> 00:41:50,120
Speaker 1: You've been in a car and the police lights come

829
00:41:50,160 --> 00:41:52,200
Speaker 1: on in the back and you we look around. We

830
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:54,200
Speaker 1: tell the white dude with us, hey, you got this

831
00:41:54,280 --> 00:41:56,600
Speaker 1: one right like you tell them they talk to the

832
00:41:56,600 --> 00:41:58,920
Speaker 1: cops for us. There have been plenty of times Robes,

833
00:41:59,000 --> 00:42:01,040
Speaker 1: I say hey, you need to handle this one, you

834
00:42:01,040 --> 00:42:04,120
Speaker 1: need to take this because they yes, see yeah, and

835
00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:06,359
Speaker 1: now it's coming, now it's coming, It's here, it's here,

836
00:42:06,400 --> 00:42:07,120
Speaker 1: all right here.

837
00:42:08,160 --> 00:42:11,280
Speaker 4: I was in Marble Falls, Texas.

838
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:13,680
Speaker 3: It's a good start to a store.

839
00:42:14,560 --> 00:42:18,840
Speaker 4: It's a suburb an hour south of Austin, and I

840
00:42:18,880 --> 00:42:24,600
Speaker 4: was there for my college roommate's wedding and I had

841
00:42:24,600 --> 00:42:28,720
Speaker 4: rented a car for the weekend and I was driving

842
00:42:30,000 --> 00:42:31,759
Speaker 4: to the and I was driving to pick up a

843
00:42:31,760 --> 00:42:34,880
Speaker 4: cowboy hat because it was cowboy themed. This is a

844
00:42:34,920 --> 00:42:35,520
Speaker 4: great story.

845
00:42:36,360 --> 00:42:39,480
Speaker 2: I think I saw the picture of YouTube on Instagram

846
00:42:39,560 --> 00:42:40,560
Speaker 2: with you with the cowboy hat.

847
00:42:40,600 --> 00:42:42,800
Speaker 3: You guys looked great. Okay, I know what you're talking about.

848
00:42:43,760 --> 00:42:49,960
Speaker 4: And Rachel's flight was delayed some by myself, and Rachel

849
00:42:50,440 --> 00:42:52,920
Speaker 4: is going to uber and meet me at the reception

850
00:42:53,040 --> 00:42:54,880
Speaker 4: and then we're going to leave after So on the

851
00:42:54,880 --> 00:42:57,799
Speaker 4: way to the reception, I get pulled over. I haven't

852
00:42:57,800 --> 00:43:02,319
Speaker 4: been pulled over. I haven't been pulled over since my

853
00:43:02,320 --> 00:43:04,920
Speaker 4: sophomore year of college when I was legitimately speeding, Like

854
00:43:04,960 --> 00:43:07,080
Speaker 4: I was speeding and I got a ticket, as you

855
00:43:07,080 --> 00:43:09,760
Speaker 4: should if you're speeding. I was going to speed limit.

856
00:43:10,160 --> 00:43:12,440
Speaker 4: I have my I have my headlights on, I have

857
00:43:12,520 --> 00:43:18,640
Speaker 4: my seat belt on. And I get pulled over and

858
00:43:18,880 --> 00:43:22,719
Speaker 4: my heart starts to race. I'm like, oh shit. I'm like,

859
00:43:22,719 --> 00:43:27,680
Speaker 4: I'm in I'm in Texas. I'm black, I'm by myself,

860
00:43:28,480 --> 00:43:30,040
Speaker 4: Like this is a rental car. I don't know where

861
00:43:30,040 --> 00:43:33,680
Speaker 4: the registration is. Like, I'm my heart is racing. I

862
00:43:33,760 --> 00:43:35,600
Speaker 4: turned the car off. I take the keys out and

863
00:43:35,600 --> 00:43:37,759
Speaker 4: put them on top of the car, and the cop

864
00:43:37,800 --> 00:43:40,400
Speaker 4: comes up to the car. He's like, sor do you

865
00:43:40,400 --> 00:43:44,480
Speaker 4: know how fast you were going? I was like the

866
00:43:44,520 --> 00:43:48,480
Speaker 4: speed limit? Like he's like you you He's like, you

867
00:43:48,520 --> 00:43:51,200
Speaker 4: flew by me, And I was like in my head,

868
00:43:51,239 --> 00:43:56,080
Speaker 4: I'm like, were you stationary like like cars typically do.

869
00:43:56,200 --> 00:43:56,399
Speaker 3: Yeah.

870
00:43:56,400 --> 00:43:58,439
Speaker 4: I'm just like I'm trying to figure out, like I'm

871
00:43:58,480 --> 00:44:00,839
Speaker 4: like what do you know how fast I was going?

872
00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:02,680
Speaker 4: And he's like, well, you were going faster than me.

873
00:44:02,719 --> 00:44:04,200
Speaker 4: And I was going to speed then, and I'm just

874
00:44:04,239 --> 00:44:07,920
Speaker 4: like and I'm just like trying to de escalate, de escalate,

875
00:44:07,920 --> 00:44:10,520
Speaker 4: to escalate, And long story short, I don't get a

876
00:44:10,520 --> 00:44:12,759
Speaker 4: ticket for speeding. I get it. I get some sort

877
00:44:12,760 --> 00:44:16,000
Speaker 4: of like infraction for improper equipment or something like that.

878
00:44:16,320 --> 00:44:18,879
Speaker 4: And I'm just like, I'm like, thank god, that's all

879
00:44:18,920 --> 00:44:20,920
Speaker 4: I made it out there with. Thank god, that's all

880
00:44:20,920 --> 00:44:22,880
Speaker 4: I made it out of that situation with. Go to

881
00:44:22,920 --> 00:44:27,560
Speaker 4: the party. Leaving the party, Rachel's in the car. This time,

882
00:44:27,600 --> 00:44:31,439
Speaker 4: I get pulled over leaving the party. Wow, I get

883
00:44:31,440 --> 00:44:34,920
Speaker 4: pulled over twice in one night. Cop comes up the car.

884
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:38,319
Speaker 4: This time. Rachel's in the car though, Oh god, I

885
00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:42,240
Speaker 4: can't make this up. Ma'am. Are you okay? Yeah?

886
00:44:42,280 --> 00:44:42,840
Speaker 2: Wow?

887
00:44:43,040 --> 00:44:46,160
Speaker 4: She's like yeah, I'm fine. He's like, you know how

888
00:44:46,120 --> 00:44:50,480
Speaker 4: I pulled you over? I was like, honestly, I have

889
00:44:50,560 --> 00:44:52,600
Speaker 4: no idea. Enlighten me, Like at this point, I'm mad.

890
00:44:52,760 --> 00:44:56,279
Speaker 4: I'm like, I'm like, he's like, you were speeding. He's like,

891
00:44:56,280 --> 00:44:59,600
Speaker 4: you were going he said, you were going thirty eight

892
00:45:00,040 --> 00:45:05,319
Speaker 4: in a thirty five technically I was speeding, and I

893
00:45:05,360 --> 00:45:08,480
Speaker 4: was like in my head, I'm just like, am I

894
00:45:08,520 --> 00:45:10,160
Speaker 4: gonna go to jail? Like what is? Like?

895
00:45:10,239 --> 00:45:10,439
Speaker 3: What?

896
00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:12,880
Speaker 4: Like I'm like, you know what, sir, I'm sorry, Like

897
00:45:12,920 --> 00:45:16,320
Speaker 4: I didn't realize that. I just tried to again, de escalate,

898
00:45:16,360 --> 00:45:18,080
Speaker 4: de escalate because that's what you have to do in

899
00:45:18,360 --> 00:45:20,719
Speaker 4: this position if you're aggressive, like who knows what's gonna happen.

900
00:45:20,719 --> 00:45:23,080
Speaker 4: So I'm like, sir, you're absolutely right, I was speeding.

901
00:45:23,160 --> 00:45:25,359
Speaker 4: I apologize, like I didn't realize I was going thirty

902
00:45:25,360 --> 00:45:29,640
Speaker 4: eight and to thirty five. He's like, a right, give

903
00:45:29,680 --> 00:45:32,120
Speaker 4: me a second, do you have your license? Gave my license?

904
00:45:32,640 --> 00:45:35,880
Speaker 4: He walks away seemed like forever, then comes back to

905
00:45:35,920 --> 00:45:39,960
Speaker 4: the car. Finally he's like, I'm gonna let you off

906
00:45:39,960 --> 00:45:42,560
Speaker 4: with a warning, but you better not come through here

907
00:45:42,600 --> 00:45:46,160
Speaker 4: speeding again. And I'm just like took my license back.

908
00:45:46,239 --> 00:45:48,040
Speaker 4: I'm just like getting chills thinking about it. And then

909
00:45:48,080 --> 00:45:50,120
Speaker 4: like Rachel was crying in the car. She's just like

910
00:45:51,080 --> 00:45:53,959
Speaker 4: I'm so sorry, Like I just I had no idea

911
00:45:53,960 --> 00:45:58,800
Speaker 4: because we'd never had an experience like that, And moments

912
00:45:58,840 --> 00:46:01,040
Speaker 4: like that is when it's like the because it's like

913
00:46:01,080 --> 00:46:03,399
Speaker 4: that's what like potentially our kids would have to deal

914
00:46:03,400 --> 00:46:07,239
Speaker 4: with And that's what life's like when you know you're

915
00:46:07,239 --> 00:46:08,359
Speaker 4: in certain parts of the world.

916
00:46:08,480 --> 00:46:12,759
Speaker 1: So we we had several of those. I was going

917
00:46:12,800 --> 00:46:14,080
Speaker 1: to ask you how she reacted.

918
00:46:14,360 --> 00:46:17,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, she was, she was not okay, like she was flustered.

919
00:46:17,840 --> 00:46:20,000
Speaker 1: But describe again, and I want Ropes to hear this.

920
00:46:20,040 --> 00:46:22,000
Speaker 1: When you get pulled over, what do you do? What

921
00:46:22,040 --> 00:46:23,600
Speaker 1: do you do as soon as you see the lights?

922
00:46:23,640 --> 00:46:26,560
Speaker 1: Just what is your process in the car took?

923
00:46:26,680 --> 00:46:29,400
Speaker 4: I turned the car off, I put the keys on

924
00:46:29,440 --> 00:46:31,800
Speaker 4: top of the car. I rolled down every single window

925
00:46:31,840 --> 00:46:33,480
Speaker 4: in the car, rolled down the back windows, I rolled

926
00:46:33,480 --> 00:46:35,239
Speaker 4: down the front windows. I turned the lights on in

927
00:46:35,239 --> 00:46:37,359
Speaker 4: the car. I have my hands on the steering wheel

928
00:46:37,440 --> 00:46:40,520
Speaker 4: like this, and I'm like shaking because I don't know

929
00:46:40,560 --> 00:46:42,839
Speaker 4: what's gonna happen, Like I don't know, Like I'm trying

930
00:46:42,840 --> 00:46:46,120
Speaker 4: to think of what I did. I'm like like everything's

931
00:46:46,160 --> 00:46:47,480
Speaker 4: racing through my Head's like did I just run a

932
00:46:47,480 --> 00:46:49,239
Speaker 4: red light that I hit somebody? Like what did I do?

933
00:46:49,680 --> 00:46:51,680
Speaker 4: And like you're just like I feel like I was.

934
00:46:52,200 --> 00:46:54,160
Speaker 4: There was no benefit of the doubt in that moment,

935
00:46:54,320 --> 00:46:56,560
Speaker 4: or there was no yeah, there was no I wasn't

936
00:46:56,600 --> 00:46:58,680
Speaker 4: given any benefit of the doubt, Like it was just like,

937
00:46:59,360 --> 00:47:02,319
Speaker 4: we're gonna find something. And you know, I'm not saying

938
00:47:02,360 --> 00:47:05,120
Speaker 4: that every situation is like that. It just happened that

939
00:47:05,120 --> 00:47:08,440
Speaker 4: that just happened to happen that night like that. And

940
00:47:08,719 --> 00:47:11,799
Speaker 4: I usually have positive interactions with law enforcement. I don't ever,

941
00:47:11,960 --> 00:47:14,320
Speaker 4: you know, find myself. They're typically helping me for something,

942
00:47:14,920 --> 00:47:16,880
Speaker 4: but in this situation, it was it was scary for

943
00:47:16,920 --> 00:47:17,399
Speaker 4: both of us.

944
00:47:17,680 --> 00:47:19,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, those are the eye opening moments that

945
00:47:20,640 --> 00:47:23,719
Speaker 2: I would be willing to say most white people can't

946
00:47:23,719 --> 00:47:27,720
Speaker 2: even imagine. It's something you actually almost need to see

947
00:47:28,120 --> 00:47:31,400
Speaker 2: to really really understand and get Someone can say it,

948
00:47:31,400 --> 00:47:32,719
Speaker 2: but when you're in it and you watch it and

949
00:47:32,719 --> 00:47:35,439
Speaker 2: you witness it, it's a completely different experience. And again

950
00:47:35,440 --> 00:47:37,759
Speaker 2: it's still a different experience for me because, as you

951
00:47:37,800 --> 00:47:40,320
Speaker 2: pointed out, the police officer asked Rachel if she was okay,

952
00:47:41,280 --> 00:47:44,440
Speaker 2: and that is that is one of those moments where

953
00:47:44,480 --> 00:47:56,520
Speaker 2: you're just like, holy crap, So do you all I

954
00:47:56,520 --> 00:47:59,160
Speaker 2: don't even know in terms of just how you all

955
00:47:59,200 --> 00:48:02,359
Speaker 2: are generally recive. Do you do you have to deal

956
00:48:02,400 --> 00:48:05,160
Speaker 2: with ugly comments? Do you have to deal with critics?

957
00:48:05,160 --> 00:48:07,319
Speaker 2: I mean, and how do you deal with with with

958
00:48:07,400 --> 00:48:10,280
Speaker 2: those types of people in the scrutiny that almost anyone

959
00:48:10,320 --> 00:48:11,480
Speaker 2: who's a public.

960
00:48:11,520 --> 00:48:13,399
Speaker 3: Couple would have to deal with. How do you guys

961
00:48:13,440 --> 00:48:13,920
Speaker 3: handle that?

962
00:48:15,040 --> 00:48:17,000
Speaker 4: I think so much of what Rachel and I share

963
00:48:17,000 --> 00:48:20,640
Speaker 4: and promote on our social platforms is just love positivity,

964
00:48:20,840 --> 00:48:27,240
Speaker 4: like joyfulness, Like we're not digging into the tea behind

965
00:48:27,280 --> 00:48:30,520
Speaker 4: this or like trying to pick apart the negativity here,

966
00:48:30,640 --> 00:48:33,799
Speaker 4: like we're only about the positivity. So like we don't

967
00:48:33,840 --> 00:48:36,480
Speaker 4: even have a breeding ground for like that type of narrative.

968
00:48:36,560 --> 00:48:39,240
Speaker 4: Like if they want that, like there's a million outlets

969
00:48:39,239 --> 00:48:41,319
Speaker 4: for that, Like they can go to this page for

970
00:48:41,400 --> 00:48:43,000
Speaker 4: the gossip, they can go to this page for the

971
00:48:43,040 --> 00:48:45,600
Speaker 4: tea and for the drama. Like that's not really where

972
00:48:45,680 --> 00:48:48,399
Speaker 4: it happens, but if there, if it does happen on

973
00:48:48,680 --> 00:48:51,359
Speaker 4: in our comments or in our messages, it's just as

974
00:48:51,360 --> 00:48:53,759
Speaker 4: simple as a block and a and a you know,

975
00:48:53,960 --> 00:48:54,799
Speaker 4: a deleting.

976
00:48:54,680 --> 00:48:56,360
Speaker 3: A block and a delete. I love a block and athlete.

977
00:48:56,400 --> 00:48:58,839
Speaker 2: In fact, my kids showed me and they went through

978
00:48:58,880 --> 00:49:01,919
Speaker 2: my stuff and there's like key words that you can save.

979
00:49:02,040 --> 00:49:04,640
Speaker 2: Any of these comments have these keywords in it, they

980
00:49:04,680 --> 00:49:08,879
Speaker 2: aren't seen that's crazy, right. I took my young daughter

981
00:49:09,840 --> 00:49:13,399
Speaker 2: on all platforms, TikTok and Instagram. My girls last week

982
00:49:13,480 --> 00:49:16,200
Speaker 2: went through and said, here are the keywords, and I

983
00:49:16,239 --> 00:49:17,120
Speaker 2: won't go through them.

984
00:49:17,160 --> 00:49:19,000
Speaker 3: But he started laughing coming up with them.

985
00:49:19,560 --> 00:49:22,160
Speaker 2: And now that they've gone through, like these twelve words,

986
00:49:22,520 --> 00:49:23,200
Speaker 2: one word, give.

987
00:49:23,160 --> 00:49:27,640
Speaker 4: Us one word, give us one. There's got to be

988
00:49:27,640 --> 00:49:30,120
Speaker 4: one that's appropriate, is it?

989
00:49:30,680 --> 00:49:36,080
Speaker 1: I mean, now, wait, so you can idental, you can

990
00:49:36,160 --> 00:49:36,960
Speaker 1: listen to words.

991
00:49:37,280 --> 00:49:38,040
Speaker 3: You can listen and.

992
00:49:39,680 --> 00:49:42,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, wait time, I'm just imagining you and your daughters.

993
00:49:44,760 --> 00:49:45,799
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, and we did that.

994
00:49:47,360 --> 00:49:49,640
Speaker 2: It's totally worked because if you start to look at

995
00:49:49,640 --> 00:49:51,680
Speaker 2: the negative comments, they all kind of say the same thing.

996
00:49:51,719 --> 00:49:52,799
Speaker 3: So you just pick out the.

997
00:49:52,719 --> 00:49:56,440
Speaker 2: Words and then now I have nothing well mostly just

998
00:49:56,520 --> 00:49:59,200
Speaker 2: positive things now. So it's been actually a game changer.

999
00:49:59,239 --> 00:50:01,759
Speaker 2: So just in you have to deal with that, like.

1000
00:50:01,719 --> 00:50:03,640
Speaker 1: Two words I need to take out.

1001
00:50:05,239 --> 00:50:07,479
Speaker 2: I actually don't want to give them any life. That's

1002
00:50:07,520 --> 00:50:09,239
Speaker 2: actually why I don't want to say them. But yeah,

1003
00:50:09,280 --> 00:50:12,200
Speaker 2: I'm thinking, oh yeah, but I'm thinking you could probably

1004
00:50:12,200 --> 00:50:14,040
Speaker 2: figure out what the words are. I actually just don't

1005
00:50:14,080 --> 00:50:16,000
Speaker 2: want to give them any power. So I don't want

1006
00:50:16,040 --> 00:50:18,719
Speaker 2: to save them out loud, because then people might try

1007
00:50:18,719 --> 00:50:21,440
Speaker 2: to find another word to get around it, and I.

1008
00:50:21,360 --> 00:50:23,920
Speaker 3: Don't want to give anybody any ideas what words I

1009
00:50:24,000 --> 00:50:28,560
Speaker 3: used to block. It's a game. It makes a difference,

1010
00:50:28,719 --> 00:50:30,480
Speaker 3: It makes a total difference.

1011
00:50:30,560 --> 00:50:32,480
Speaker 1: You know you you're like you said, but you're a

1012
00:50:32,480 --> 00:50:35,239
Speaker 1: big part and there's so much there. I mean, God,

1013
00:50:35,280 --> 00:50:40,160
Speaker 1: how many blogs or sites or dedicated to just Bachelor Nation?

1014
00:50:41,360 --> 00:50:41,640
Speaker 4: Do you?

1015
00:50:41,719 --> 00:50:45,000
Speaker 1: Are you a proud alum of Bachelor Nation?

1016
00:50:45,800 --> 00:50:46,040
Speaker 3: Yeah?

1017
00:50:46,160 --> 00:50:48,719
Speaker 4: I mean it gave me one of the best things

1018
00:50:48,760 --> 00:50:51,640
Speaker 4: that's ever happened to me, which is my relationship with Rachel.

1019
00:50:51,800 --> 00:50:54,800
Speaker 4: Like I wouldn't be in I wouldn't be in a

1020
00:50:54,880 --> 00:50:56,480
Speaker 4: relationship with the woman I love if it wasn't for

1021
00:50:56,520 --> 00:51:00,400
Speaker 4: the show. And there was more positive than negative that

1022
00:51:00,440 --> 00:51:02,600
Speaker 4: came from it. There's negativity and everything, but if you

1023
00:51:02,880 --> 00:51:04,440
Speaker 4: and if we decided to dwell on it, then that

1024
00:51:04,520 --> 00:51:07,560
Speaker 4: just tarnishes anything. Like there's probably an experience we all

1025
00:51:07,560 --> 00:51:09,680
Speaker 4: had in college where it's like, when someone asked you

1026
00:51:09,719 --> 00:51:12,000
Speaker 4: about college, you think about the best times you had.

1027
00:51:12,040 --> 00:51:14,279
Speaker 4: It's like, man, that one time where I failed that

1028
00:51:14,360 --> 00:51:16,520
Speaker 4: test and I was hungover, Like, no, you don't think

1029
00:51:16,520 --> 00:51:18,920
Speaker 4: about that stuff. You think about all of the things

1030
00:51:18,960 --> 00:51:23,840
Speaker 4: that made that experience joyful, and yeah, I am happy

1031
00:51:23,880 --> 00:51:30,239
Speaker 4: about I'm happy, I'm proud about the experience. But a

1032
00:51:30,280 --> 00:51:34,120
Speaker 4: lot of what comes with being a part of that

1033
00:51:34,160 --> 00:51:42,160
Speaker 4: show is speculating on relationships and rumors and gossip and

1034
00:51:42,200 --> 00:51:46,279
Speaker 4: weighing in on things, and frankly, I don't want to

1035
00:51:46,320 --> 00:51:49,080
Speaker 4: be a part of anything negative into anybody's life. So

1036
00:51:49,400 --> 00:51:51,520
Speaker 4: that's the only reason why I steer clear of those

1037
00:51:51,560 --> 00:51:55,200
Speaker 4: type of conversations. So like, there's I have love for everybody,

1038
00:51:55,520 --> 00:51:57,640
Speaker 4: like I don't have ill will towards anybody, And if

1039
00:51:57,640 --> 00:52:00,839
Speaker 4: anybody ever reaches out to me, I'm there to chop

1040
00:52:00,880 --> 00:52:02,719
Speaker 4: it up with him, but I'll never go out of

1041
00:52:02,719 --> 00:52:05,680
Speaker 4: my way to like, you know, insert myself into something

1042
00:52:05,680 --> 00:52:08,080
Speaker 4: that a place I don't think I should be. But

1043
00:52:08,080 --> 00:52:10,040
Speaker 4: if someone reaches out, I'm there. And I've had a

1044
00:52:10,040 --> 00:52:12,680
Speaker 4: bunch of former Bachelor and Bachelorettes reach out after the

1045
00:52:12,719 --> 00:52:14,400
Speaker 4: season being like, how did you navigate this? How do

1046
00:52:14,440 --> 00:52:17,440
Speaker 4: you navigate that? And I'm there to give advice and

1047
00:52:17,560 --> 00:52:19,960
Speaker 4: a sounding board, and I'll reach out similar to how

1048
00:52:20,400 --> 00:52:22,400
Speaker 4: our conversations were when you were going through stuff to

1049
00:52:22,520 --> 00:52:24,920
Speaker 4: know that, like you know, sometimes you're living in a bubble,

1050
00:52:25,400 --> 00:52:27,799
Speaker 4: like it's like you think that you're at you know,

1051
00:52:27,800 --> 00:52:29,160
Speaker 4: you're at the grocery store and you're like, oh, that

1052
00:52:29,160 --> 00:52:31,120
Speaker 4: person knows about this. It's like, man, they're just trying

1053
00:52:31,120 --> 00:52:34,399
Speaker 4: to get cheese. Like so not everyone's always thinking about

1054
00:52:34,440 --> 00:52:36,719
Speaker 4: what you're going through, Like like, it's okay.

1055
00:52:36,960 --> 00:52:39,759
Speaker 2: Do you have a relationship with Have you talked to

1056
00:52:39,960 --> 00:52:42,560
Speaker 2: Chris Harrison at all after everything that happened.

1057
00:52:42,719 --> 00:52:44,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, we're in the same fantasy league. We're in the

1058
00:52:44,440 --> 00:52:48,200
Speaker 4: same football fantasy league, so there's there. There have been

1059
00:52:48,239 --> 00:52:53,239
Speaker 4: multiple conversations there and we have mutual friends. One of

1060
00:52:53,239 --> 00:52:56,839
Speaker 4: my one of my really good friends, Jack Arnold, who's

1061
00:52:56,880 --> 00:53:00,240
Speaker 4: a chef, always face sounds me when he's with them,

1062
00:53:01,080 --> 00:53:03,440
Speaker 4: So there's no bad blood. Like I understand everyone has

1063
00:53:03,440 --> 00:53:08,200
Speaker 4: a job to do, and I, uh, you know, the

1064
00:53:08,239 --> 00:53:13,360
Speaker 4: way I look at everything in life is that I

1065
00:53:13,480 --> 00:53:17,840
Speaker 4: every single day in my life, I make horrible decisions

1066
00:53:18,360 --> 00:53:23,800
Speaker 4: like I, you know, might oversleep and I'll miss a

1067
00:53:23,840 --> 00:53:25,319
Speaker 4: train and I'll be late to something that has a

1068
00:53:25,360 --> 00:53:28,799
Speaker 4: ripple effect to something else. I'll get in a conversation,

1069
00:53:28,960 --> 00:53:30,680
Speaker 4: I'll say something to Rachel that I wish I could

1070
00:53:30,680 --> 00:53:36,319
Speaker 4: take back, and I'm given forgiveness for that, and so

1071
00:53:37,760 --> 00:53:40,600
Speaker 4: if I'm given forgiveness for the things that I do

1072
00:53:41,120 --> 00:53:43,600
Speaker 4: and wrong people like who am I not to forgive

1073
00:53:43,640 --> 00:53:47,799
Speaker 4: people who I think have had that similar experience. So,

1074
00:53:48,080 --> 00:53:51,040
Speaker 4: I mean, that's my healthy approach to dealing with anything

1075
00:53:51,080 --> 00:53:55,240
Speaker 4: with anybody that you know there might be bad blood.

1076
00:53:55,239 --> 00:53:57,320
Speaker 4: It's like, I'm not going to hold a grudge because

1077
00:53:57,400 --> 00:53:58,960
Speaker 4: you know, God doesn't hold a grudge for the things

1078
00:53:58,960 --> 00:54:01,239
Speaker 4: that I've done. And when I look, when I take

1079
00:54:01,280 --> 00:54:05,200
Speaker 4: that approach towards anything, then again, it promotes the positivity

1080
00:54:05,239 --> 00:54:07,000
Speaker 4: and I don't have time to dwell on the hate

1081
00:54:07,080 --> 00:54:09,960
Speaker 4: because it just it's it's not hurting that person, it's

1082
00:54:10,040 --> 00:54:12,920
Speaker 4: hurting you. You know, You're just it's just it's not

1083
00:54:12,960 --> 00:54:13,359
Speaker 4: worth it.

1084
00:54:13,760 --> 00:54:15,279
Speaker 1: You're in a fantasy league with them now. But it

1085
00:54:15,320 --> 00:54:17,920
Speaker 1: did take a while, did it? Or were there some

1086
00:54:17,960 --> 00:54:21,839
Speaker 1: early uncomfortable first few conversations or was it kind of

1087
00:54:22,040 --> 00:54:22,880
Speaker 1: squashed early on?

1088
00:54:23,239 --> 00:54:28,239
Speaker 4: It wasn't like like it wasn't even addressed. It wasn't

1089
00:54:28,280 --> 00:54:33,759
Speaker 4: even like like like from a in the fantasy I

1090
00:54:33,880 --> 00:54:36,520
Speaker 4: use the fantasy league as like a like if you

1091
00:54:37,000 --> 00:54:39,520
Speaker 4: had disdain or ill will for someone like I'm sure

1092
00:54:39,560 --> 00:54:42,440
Speaker 4: you probably wouldn't be in the same fantasy leagueism. But

1093
00:54:42,920 --> 00:54:46,040
Speaker 4: I say that to say that, like our fantasy league

1094
00:54:46,040 --> 00:54:47,960
Speaker 4: is about fantasy football, it's not about like the Matt

1095
00:54:48,000 --> 00:54:50,319
Speaker 4: and Chris relationship. But there we had. We had a

1096
00:54:50,320 --> 00:54:55,400
Speaker 4: conversation after uh, after everything's take place, after everything took place,

1097
00:54:55,560 --> 00:55:00,520
Speaker 4: and it was it was a good conversation. It wasn't

1098
00:55:00,800 --> 00:55:02,719
Speaker 4: I did. I didn't screen his call, like if he

1099
00:55:02,800 --> 00:55:07,680
Speaker 4: text me, I'll respond, But yeah, there was no there's

1100
00:55:07,680 --> 00:55:12,360
Speaker 4: no hard feelings for for anybody, just based off of

1101
00:55:12,400 --> 00:55:16,280
Speaker 4: the way that I look at life and the grace

1102
00:55:16,320 --> 00:55:16,800
Speaker 4: I'm shown.

1103
00:55:16,960 --> 00:55:22,280
Speaker 3: So do you think he should have left the Bachelor?

1104
00:55:22,360 --> 00:55:24,840
Speaker 3: He should have lost his job over that?

1105
00:55:26,880 --> 00:55:30,719
Speaker 4: I don't know, Like it's I don't I don't know

1106
00:55:30,719 --> 00:55:34,239
Speaker 4: who who I am to make that judgment call. I

1107
00:55:34,320 --> 00:55:37,680
Speaker 4: obviously didn't make it because you know he was, he

1108
00:55:37,760 --> 00:55:43,000
Speaker 4: was there after whatever we went through happened. But I

1109
00:55:43,200 --> 00:55:47,520
Speaker 4: don't wish. I don't wish anybody. I don't wish. I

1110
00:55:47,520 --> 00:55:51,600
Speaker 4: don't wish any harm on anybody. And when you have

1111
00:55:51,680 --> 00:55:56,680
Speaker 4: a situation like that, like what is the right way

1112
00:55:56,680 --> 00:55:58,920
Speaker 4: to go forward? Like who who who is to make

1113
00:55:58,960 --> 00:56:03,080
Speaker 4: that judgment call? So for him, I mean, whoever handled

1114
00:56:03,080 --> 00:56:06,759
Speaker 4: the situation handled it? How they best all fit, and

1115
00:56:08,360 --> 00:56:12,080
Speaker 4: the show goes on. I mean the show would and

1116
00:56:12,120 --> 00:56:15,560
Speaker 4: will be there long after he's gone, long after I'm gone.

1117
00:56:16,000 --> 00:56:19,160
Speaker 4: So I mean maybe something that was gonna happen inevitably

1118
00:56:19,280 --> 00:56:22,719
Speaker 4: just was sped up. And from what I've seen from

1119
00:56:22,760 --> 00:56:26,759
Speaker 4: him and his relationship with Lauren and what he's doing now,

1120
00:56:26,800 --> 00:56:30,200
Speaker 4: like it was a chapter. Like everything in life is

1121
00:56:30,200 --> 00:56:33,080
Speaker 4: a chapter, and I think it's dangerous when you make

1122
00:56:33,160 --> 00:56:36,240
Speaker 4: something that's meant to be a chapter your whole book.

1123
00:56:36,800 --> 00:56:40,120
Speaker 4: So yeah, I mean I don't know, do I think

1124
00:56:40,160 --> 00:56:43,319
Speaker 4: it was the right thing? Like, Thank goodness, I don't

1125
00:56:43,320 --> 00:56:45,160
Speaker 4: have to make any type of calls like that because

1126
00:56:45,719 --> 00:56:48,680
Speaker 4: you know, I probably make things based more off emotion

1127
00:56:48,800 --> 00:56:55,240
Speaker 4: than like how things should go. But yeah, like I said,

1128
00:56:55,520 --> 00:56:59,840
Speaker 4: the show will be here long after us, and some

1129
00:57:00,040 --> 00:57:02,040
Speaker 4: thing that would have happened inevitably just happened sooner.

1130
00:57:02,120 --> 00:57:03,520
Speaker 3: So you watching the current season?

1131
00:57:04,200 --> 00:57:13,400
Speaker 4: Uh there's no, no, no, but like like not because

1132
00:57:13,400 --> 00:57:16,440
Speaker 4: I don't want to watch it, Like well, I just

1133
00:57:17,200 --> 00:57:21,160
Speaker 4: like I'm watching like True Detective, Like there's like season four,

1134
00:57:21,240 --> 00:57:23,000
Speaker 4: like like what's her name?

1135
00:57:24,760 --> 00:57:26,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, we were just talking about that show.

1136
00:57:27,200 --> 00:57:30,160
Speaker 4: I've this is a very weird reason to have a

1137
00:57:30,200 --> 00:57:32,400
Speaker 4: crush on somebody, but I had a crush on Jeddie

1138
00:57:32,440 --> 00:57:34,400
Speaker 4: Foster since like Silence of the Lamps.

1139
00:57:34,640 --> 00:57:39,360
Speaker 3: Such a good movie. Yes, yeah, so like Larry's yeah agent.

1140
00:57:39,680 --> 00:57:42,080
Speaker 4: So when she was gonna be on Detective season four,

1141
00:57:42,240 --> 00:57:46,560
Speaker 4: Like that's I mean, I'm watching TV. But and the

1142
00:57:46,600 --> 00:57:51,960
Speaker 4: thing about being a former uh lead you you get

1143
00:57:52,000 --> 00:57:55,080
Speaker 4: all the tea anyways, Like like I know what happened

1144
00:57:55,560 --> 00:57:58,560
Speaker 4: and what's gonna happen because I have friends who are producers.

1145
00:57:58,720 --> 00:58:01,200
Speaker 4: I have friends who you know, you're you're connected, so

1146
00:58:01,240 --> 00:58:02,200
Speaker 4: I know what's going on.

1147
00:58:02,480 --> 00:58:04,320
Speaker 3: You already know how it ends everything.

1148
00:58:04,960 --> 00:58:08,720
Speaker 1: I think you know how this season ends. Yeah, don't

1149
00:58:08,800 --> 00:58:10,760
Speaker 1: tell me that, because it's our job to get it

1150
00:58:10,760 --> 00:58:12,480
Speaker 1: out of you, just as much.

1151
00:58:12,320 --> 00:58:16,280
Speaker 4: As anybody else knows. Like, like who knows if it's true?

1152
00:58:16,440 --> 00:58:18,480
Speaker 4: Like from people I've talked to people who were there,

1153
00:58:18,640 --> 00:58:20,480
Speaker 4: it's like, you know, it could be a lie, but

1154
00:58:21,080 --> 00:58:23,440
Speaker 4: it's it's it was information that was offered up. You know.

1155
00:58:23,480 --> 00:58:25,280
Speaker 4: It's it's not like I was like, yeah, yeah, like,

1156
00:58:25,520 --> 00:58:27,040
Speaker 4: so tell me how it is.

1157
00:58:27,200 --> 00:58:32,760
Speaker 1: Wait, so what you're talking about is already out there? No, okay,

1158
00:58:33,120 --> 00:58:35,720
Speaker 1: so you know the post stuff and yeah, yeah, the

1159
00:58:36,320 --> 00:58:38,840
Speaker 1: piece together that it was probably this because he knows

1160
00:58:38,960 --> 00:58:43,360
Speaker 1: that you actually know right now who what happens at

1161
00:58:43,360 --> 00:58:44,560
Speaker 1: the end of this season with The Bachelor.

1162
00:58:45,720 --> 00:58:49,080
Speaker 3: Yes, based off what I was told from people who

1163
00:58:49,080 --> 00:58:50,880
Speaker 3: would know. Though, from people who would know, I have

1164
00:58:50,920 --> 00:58:51,400
Speaker 3: a question.

1165
00:58:52,800 --> 00:58:57,480
Speaker 2: Did you have you and Rachel together sat down and

1166
00:58:57,640 --> 00:59:00,000
Speaker 2: watched your season up The Bachelor?

1167
00:59:00,280 --> 00:59:00,400
Speaker 1: Oh?

1168
00:59:00,520 --> 00:59:02,640
Speaker 4: No, I don't think we'll ever watch the season together.

1169
00:59:03,520 --> 00:59:08,400
Speaker 4: And just because like it's it's a it's a weird

1170
00:59:08,600 --> 00:59:14,080
Speaker 4: dynamic because you're with that person now and you weren't

1171
00:59:14,120 --> 00:59:15,600
Speaker 4: together when you were making.

1172
00:59:15,560 --> 00:59:16,920
Speaker 3: You were kissing other women.

1173
00:59:16,720 --> 00:59:19,360
Speaker 4: You were kissing other women. But like I I am

1174
00:59:19,400 --> 00:59:23,520
Speaker 4: not ashamed of anything that I did or said on

1175
00:59:23,680 --> 00:59:26,880
Speaker 4: the show. And I think that I think one of

1176
00:59:26,880 --> 00:59:30,280
Speaker 4: the reasons why Rachel respects me as much as she

1177
00:59:30,360 --> 00:59:34,400
Speaker 4: does is the consistency and my messaging and my actions

1178
00:59:34,440 --> 00:59:36,520
Speaker 4: from the moment that we met to where we are now,

1179
00:59:36,600 --> 00:59:39,960
Speaker 4: because it hasn't changed. Yeah, you know, I wasn't and

1180
00:59:40,080 --> 00:59:42,080
Speaker 4: to each his own like, but I wasn't, you know,

1181
00:59:42,520 --> 00:59:44,640
Speaker 4: telling a lot of multiple people I loved them and

1182
00:59:44,720 --> 00:59:46,760
Speaker 4: just taking this opportunity to like sleep with a bunch

1183
00:59:46,800 --> 00:59:49,040
Speaker 4: of people, Like that's just not who I am. And

1184
00:59:49,240 --> 00:59:52,840
Speaker 4: does that happen on the show? Yeah, And like again

1185
00:59:52,920 --> 00:59:54,480
Speaker 4: like if that's how you want to go about finding

1186
00:59:54,520 --> 00:59:56,320
Speaker 4: the person you want to be with, like, I'm not

1187
00:59:56,400 --> 00:59:58,440
Speaker 4: stopping them because it gets people to that point, but

1188
00:59:58,480 --> 00:59:59,800
Speaker 4: it's not something I needed to do.

1189
01:00:00,000 --> 01:00:01,440
Speaker 2: Can you be in love with I mean, if you've

1190
01:00:01,440 --> 01:00:04,200
Speaker 2: watched any of these shows or any of these seasons,

1191
01:00:04,400 --> 01:00:06,320
Speaker 2: the question I think a lot of people ask, can

1192
01:00:06,360 --> 01:00:08,160
Speaker 2: you be in love with more than one person at

1193
01:00:08,200 --> 01:00:08,840
Speaker 2: the same time?

1194
01:00:09,080 --> 01:00:11,080
Speaker 4: I think you can lust more than one person at

1195
01:00:11,080 --> 01:00:13,880
Speaker 4: one time. But when you really love somebody and you've

1196
01:00:13,880 --> 01:00:16,280
Speaker 4: been in love, like, there's just certain things you wouldn't

1197
01:00:16,280 --> 01:00:18,120
Speaker 4: do to that person. So I think if you really

1198
01:00:18,160 --> 01:00:20,760
Speaker 4: love somebody, like if I'm telling you I love you

1199
01:00:20,800 --> 01:00:22,840
Speaker 4: and then I'm going to sleep with somebody else, Like

1200
01:00:23,640 --> 01:00:28,760
Speaker 4: I don't personally think that's love, but again in the

1201
01:00:29,080 --> 01:00:32,160
Speaker 4: figuring out process, like some people have to do certain

1202
01:00:32,240 --> 01:00:34,280
Speaker 4: things to figure out who they want to be with.

1203
01:00:34,480 --> 01:00:36,040
Speaker 4: And I'm not going to knock that because I'm not

1204
01:00:36,040 --> 01:00:36,720
Speaker 4: the love doctor.

1205
01:00:36,800 --> 01:00:39,080
Speaker 2: Well, and I asked if you and Rachel watched your

1206
01:00:39,080 --> 01:00:43,360
Speaker 2: season together, but have you individually and has she individually

1207
01:00:43,680 --> 01:00:47,760
Speaker 2: watched the season as it was released to the public.

1208
01:00:47,960 --> 01:00:50,000
Speaker 4: You know, it's funny. I think that like when the

1209
01:00:50,080 --> 01:00:52,720
Speaker 4: show's coming out, it's like so exciting, So like you're

1210
01:00:52,720 --> 01:00:54,960
Speaker 4: having these watch parties and like all her girlfriends are

1211
01:00:54,960 --> 01:00:57,680
Speaker 4: over and like, oh my gosh, like you're kind of

1212
01:00:57,720 --> 01:01:00,800
Speaker 4: have a limo. And then like see in week two

1213
01:01:01,040 --> 01:01:02,920
Speaker 4: and then and then it starts to get serious and

1214
01:01:02,960 --> 01:01:04,960
Speaker 4: it's like, you know, the watch parties kind of end.

1215
01:01:05,680 --> 01:01:08,479
Speaker 4: You know, you're not like tweeting about the episode. It's

1216
01:01:08,520 --> 01:01:11,720
Speaker 4: like you might have seen a very serious conversation with

1217
01:01:11,760 --> 01:01:14,520
Speaker 4: somebody else. So it's it's it gets weird. Yeah, it

1218
01:01:14,520 --> 01:01:15,040
Speaker 4: gets weird.

1219
01:01:15,120 --> 01:01:17,720
Speaker 3: It's hard. I mean, I'm imagining how hard that would be.

1220
01:01:17,920 --> 01:01:20,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, So I mean, and but the thing with Rachel

1221
01:01:20,680 --> 01:01:22,640
Speaker 4: and I is she knew where I stood, like I

1222
01:01:22,680 --> 01:01:27,360
Speaker 4: and I told her. I gave her confirmation on my

1223
01:01:27,440 --> 01:01:30,200
Speaker 4: feelings for her. And but she could have taken that

1224
01:01:30,560 --> 01:01:32,040
Speaker 4: any way she wanted. She could have been like, oh,

1225
01:01:32,040 --> 01:01:34,600
Speaker 4: it's probably telling everybody that and that's just not who

1226
01:01:34,680 --> 01:01:36,400
Speaker 4: I am. I'm sure people, you know, tell a bunch

1227
01:01:36,440 --> 01:01:38,480
Speaker 4: of people that, Yo, this is us, this is us,

1228
01:01:38,480 --> 01:01:40,760
Speaker 4: this is us. But you know, she took my word

1229
01:01:40,800 --> 01:01:44,120
Speaker 4: at face value, and like that trust is like built

1230
01:01:44,400 --> 01:01:46,720
Speaker 4: the love and admiration I have for her because I'm like,

1231
01:01:47,640 --> 01:01:51,200
Speaker 4: she for no, like there's no reason why she should

1232
01:01:51,200 --> 01:01:52,520
Speaker 4: have trusted anything I said.

1233
01:01:52,640 --> 01:01:55,400
Speaker 3: She didn't really know me like seven hours.

1234
01:01:55,160 --> 01:01:59,360
Speaker 4: Right until yeah, maybe less, but like she she believed

1235
01:01:59,360 --> 01:02:02,600
Speaker 4: me and like trusted me in like that meant a lot.

1236
01:02:03,080 --> 01:02:06,960
Speaker 4: Like she's like okay, like never faltered from it. I'm

1237
01:02:07,000 --> 01:02:16,480
Speaker 4: just like, dang, she's a real one.

1238
01:02:17,440 --> 01:02:20,680
Speaker 1: It's amazing to hear you because again, we have obviously

1239
01:02:20,840 --> 01:02:22,280
Speaker 1: robes and I have been through a lot when it

1240
01:02:22,280 --> 01:02:24,520
Speaker 1: comes to relationships and it comes to marriages and being

1241
01:02:24,560 --> 01:02:27,760
Speaker 1: in a relationship publicly and in a racial relationship, all this.

1242
01:02:27,840 --> 01:02:30,800
Speaker 1: But you are sitting here talking about Rachel in such

1243
01:02:30,800 --> 01:02:35,120
Speaker 1: a way, in a loving way that we always say

1244
01:02:35,120 --> 01:02:39,680
Speaker 1: this love relationships, marriage, It's messy sometimes. And to see

1245
01:02:39,680 --> 01:02:43,720
Speaker 1: you sitting here at this point, this happy and speaking

1246
01:02:43,760 --> 01:02:47,480
Speaker 1: this publicly and strongly about her, given that, yeah, you

1247
01:02:47,560 --> 01:02:49,400
Speaker 1: had to go on a show, you were the first

1248
01:02:49,480 --> 01:02:53,320
Speaker 1: black bachelor, Your season went the hell because of controversy

1249
01:02:53,400 --> 01:02:56,080
Speaker 1: in a lot of ways. You break up with her,

1250
01:02:56,280 --> 01:02:59,640
Speaker 1: you get back with her, but that is messy as hell.

1251
01:03:00,400 --> 01:03:02,520
Speaker 1: But you're sitting here happy at this end, and I

1252
01:03:02,520 --> 01:03:05,920
Speaker 1: don't know how any of us could not be happy

1253
01:03:06,040 --> 01:03:09,760
Speaker 1: or take you with your face value that you love her,

1254
01:03:09,760 --> 01:03:14,200
Speaker 1: And it's just another great example of is just messy

1255
01:03:14,240 --> 01:03:17,200
Speaker 1: and ugly sometimes to get to this point.

1256
01:03:17,400 --> 01:03:18,320
Speaker 3: What a journey man.

1257
01:03:18,440 --> 01:03:22,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, she's a rider, like she's There's this trend for

1258
01:03:22,720 --> 01:03:25,120
Speaker 4: a while where people were telling their they were coming home,

1259
01:03:25,120 --> 01:03:27,320
Speaker 4: and the parents were coming home to their kids, and

1260
01:03:27,320 --> 01:03:29,200
Speaker 4: they were telling their kid like, let's say, your little

1261
01:03:29,280 --> 01:03:31,760
Speaker 4: son's name is Billy. You're coming, like Billy, Like this

1262
01:03:31,800 --> 01:03:33,280
Speaker 4: little kid down the street picked a fight with me.

1263
01:03:33,400 --> 01:03:34,680
Speaker 4: The parents said like, I need you to go beat

1264
01:03:34,680 --> 01:03:36,320
Speaker 4: this kid up. And Billy gets up, He's all right,

1265
01:03:36,400 --> 01:03:38,600
Speaker 4: let's go. And like these little kids were like riding

1266
01:03:38,640 --> 01:03:42,320
Speaker 4: out for their parents. And I feel like, Rachel, if

1267
01:03:42,360 --> 01:03:44,200
Speaker 4: there was anything I ever need, like Rachel, I need

1268
01:03:44,240 --> 01:03:45,800
Speaker 4: you to do, like not to beat somebody up, but

1269
01:03:45,880 --> 01:03:53,080
Speaker 4: like there's just nothing that like there's just so much

1270
01:03:53,120 --> 01:03:55,840
Speaker 4: love there that like she would we would do anything

1271
01:03:55,880 --> 01:03:56,360
Speaker 4: for each other.

1272
01:03:56,600 --> 01:03:58,560
Speaker 1: Am I the only one that he was telling that story.

1273
01:03:58,600 --> 01:04:00,800
Speaker 1: All I saw now was a like a little baby

1274
01:04:00,880 --> 01:04:02,520
Speaker 1: Rachel going out and beating somebody up.

1275
01:04:04,720 --> 01:04:05,960
Speaker 3: Well, can you?

1276
01:04:06,040 --> 01:04:08,000
Speaker 2: I mean? And I don't want to harp on the negative,

1277
01:04:08,000 --> 01:04:10,200
Speaker 2: but I think it's important to recognize where you've been

1278
01:04:10,280 --> 01:04:12,360
Speaker 2: to figure out or at least the perspective of where

1279
01:04:12,400 --> 01:04:12,720
Speaker 2: you are.

1280
01:04:13,160 --> 01:04:14,640
Speaker 3: What was the lowest moment.

1281
01:04:15,400 --> 01:04:20,760
Speaker 4: MM Probably when I thought that I would never talk

1282
01:04:20,800 --> 01:04:24,600
Speaker 4: to her again. And that was like right after the

1283
01:04:24,600 --> 01:04:27,280
Speaker 4: show when we broke up, because I felt like it

1284
01:04:27,320 --> 01:04:29,880
Speaker 4: was the right thing to do. I'm like, yeah, guys,

1285
01:04:29,960 --> 01:04:32,000
Speaker 4: like everyone out there like we did it, like I

1286
01:04:32,040 --> 01:04:33,280
Speaker 4: did it, like I did it.

1287
01:04:33,760 --> 01:04:35,200
Speaker 3: You felt pressure to break up with her?

1288
01:04:36,520 --> 01:04:38,960
Speaker 4: I just felt like I felt like there was something

1289
01:04:38,960 --> 01:04:41,680
Speaker 4: that that conversation we had at the end of the

1290
01:04:41,720 --> 01:04:46,560
Speaker 4: show on like the AFR man that was tough. That

1291
01:04:46,720 --> 01:04:49,760
Speaker 4: was like I don't think we were together at that

1292
01:04:49,760 --> 01:04:50,640
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, we weren't together.

1293
01:04:50,720 --> 01:04:53,600
Speaker 3: Weren't together, right, Yeah, you guys were, Yeah.

1294
01:04:53,400 --> 01:04:54,880
Speaker 4: We went. That was like the first time I'd seen

1295
01:04:54,960 --> 01:04:57,360
Speaker 4: him forever, and like you're just like forced to have

1296
01:04:57,400 --> 01:04:59,600
Speaker 4: this like conversation with someone that you like still love

1297
01:05:00,000 --> 01:05:04,400
Speaker 4: you're not together because like you don't really know if

1298
01:05:04,440 --> 01:05:07,480
Speaker 4: you know each other because like that seven hours, it's

1299
01:05:07,520 --> 01:05:09,960
Speaker 4: like like I think I know you, Like I think

1300
01:05:10,000 --> 01:05:12,480
Speaker 4: what we experienced was real, but like is it real?

1301
01:05:13,120 --> 01:05:15,720
Speaker 4: Like are you really this much of a rider, like,

1302
01:05:15,760 --> 01:05:18,960
Speaker 4: are you really this down for me? And like that

1303
01:05:19,000 --> 01:05:22,720
Speaker 4: takes years to figure out? Like from my experience, it

1304
01:05:22,760 --> 01:05:27,840
Speaker 4: took us almost ten. Yeah, Like I mean, so that

1305
01:05:28,000 --> 01:05:29,600
Speaker 4: was like kind of what I was trying to figure out.

1306
01:05:29,640 --> 01:05:32,160
Speaker 4: I'm like, do I like, is she who she says

1307
01:05:32,200 --> 01:05:34,920
Speaker 4: she is? And once I figured out that she was

1308
01:05:34,960 --> 01:05:36,880
Speaker 4: and she never faltered off that, I'm like, man, I

1309
01:05:36,920 --> 01:05:40,440
Speaker 4: can't let this go. But yeah, that was the craziest thing.

1310
01:05:40,480 --> 01:05:43,960
Speaker 4: It's like trying to discern what is and isn't real,

1311
01:05:44,280 --> 01:05:46,120
Speaker 4: and it was she was real the whole time.

1312
01:05:46,320 --> 01:05:49,320
Speaker 1: So yeah, and you can knock me down for this,

1313
01:05:49,480 --> 01:05:51,919
Speaker 1: but I I'm trying to think if we've talked about

1314
01:05:51,920 --> 01:05:54,840
Speaker 1: this privately before I say this here. No, No, it's

1315
01:05:54,920 --> 01:05:57,120
Speaker 1: not a bad thing, but it does play a role.

1316
01:05:57,160 --> 01:05:59,280
Speaker 1: It played a role with us recently. But so much

1317
01:05:59,280 --> 01:06:00,960
Speaker 1: of what was coming at you and coming at her

1318
01:06:01,160 --> 01:06:03,800
Speaker 1: at the time had to do with her doing something

1319
01:06:03,880 --> 01:06:06,400
Speaker 1: that many viewed as racist. And here you are, as

1320
01:06:06,440 --> 01:06:10,080
Speaker 1: a black man being celebrated, applauded, and we all applauded

1321
01:06:10,120 --> 01:06:12,040
Speaker 1: the show, even like all right, you got a brother

1322
01:06:12,080 --> 01:06:17,439
Speaker 1: in there. That's great, And what did you feel even

1323
01:06:17,480 --> 01:06:20,600
Speaker 1: if it was perceived from the black community. It say, Wow,

1324
01:06:20,640 --> 01:06:23,240
Speaker 1: everybody loves me, They're down for me, and now I

1325
01:06:23,280 --> 01:06:24,960
Speaker 1: love this girl. I think I love this girl. This

1326
01:06:25,040 --> 01:06:28,120
Speaker 1: is something special with her that they are looking at

1327
01:06:28,160 --> 01:06:30,440
Speaker 1: her now, Like how dare How could I as a

1328
01:06:30,480 --> 01:06:34,480
Speaker 1: black man be with a woman that everybody thinks is

1329
01:06:34,680 --> 01:06:38,360
Speaker 1: this thing? How did you deal with that in your

1330
01:06:38,400 --> 01:06:39,800
Speaker 1: own head? Like I said, some of it might have

1331
01:06:39,840 --> 01:06:42,520
Speaker 1: been perceived, but some of it was actually out there

1332
01:06:42,560 --> 01:06:42,960
Speaker 1: as well.

1333
01:06:43,080 --> 01:06:47,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, this is like the most like politically incorrect way

1334
01:06:47,480 --> 01:06:52,920
Speaker 4: to draw a comparison. But I recently watched the OJ

1335
01:06:53,160 --> 01:06:58,880
Speaker 4: documentary and which was I mean, the way that the

1336
01:06:58,920 --> 01:07:01,120
Speaker 4: story was I want alive during that time, so I

1337
01:07:01,120 --> 01:07:03,960
Speaker 4: had no idea and I'm learning in real time, and

1338
01:07:04,120 --> 01:07:08,920
Speaker 4: as I watched the trial play on and the verdict

1339
01:07:09,040 --> 01:07:12,760
Speaker 4: come out, and this is my interpretation of it, it

1340
01:07:12,800 --> 01:07:16,000
Speaker 4: was less about the verdict and it was more about

1341
01:07:16,280 --> 01:07:20,320
Speaker 4: black first white. And so when I think about our relationship,

1342
01:07:20,400 --> 01:07:22,120
Speaker 4: it was more. It was less about the love and

1343
01:07:22,160 --> 01:07:26,960
Speaker 4: it was more about the black first white. And when

1344
01:07:27,000 --> 01:07:30,960
Speaker 4: when that's the case, like you lose sight of what's important.

1345
01:07:31,880 --> 01:07:33,640
Speaker 4: I don't know if that answers the question, but that's

1346
01:07:34,200 --> 01:07:34,720
Speaker 4: I get it.

1347
01:07:34,760 --> 01:07:36,880
Speaker 3: I get it. We were alive for the trial. In fact,

1348
01:07:36,880 --> 01:07:37,800
Speaker 3: I was in a newsroom.

1349
01:07:38,160 --> 01:07:38,880
Speaker 4: That's crazy.

1350
01:07:39,120 --> 01:07:42,400
Speaker 2: That's how an age gaft. I was in a classroom. Still,

1351
01:07:43,480 --> 01:07:46,120
Speaker 2: that was my first job. It was my first job

1352
01:07:46,760 --> 01:07:48,960
Speaker 2: in college. Oh, my first year in high school. Yeah,

1353
01:07:49,520 --> 01:07:52,560
Speaker 2: stop it, that is not true. That is not true.

1354
01:07:53,760 --> 01:07:56,760
Speaker 2: But I remember being in my in in my first newsroom.

1355
01:07:57,080 --> 01:08:00,440
Speaker 2: I think I was twenty two and watching Oprah and

1356
01:08:00,480 --> 01:08:03,800
Speaker 2: watching the black reaction versus the white reaction when it

1357
01:08:03,840 --> 01:08:06,000
Speaker 2: all it was, it's funny. I get what you're saying.

1358
01:08:06,080 --> 01:08:08,520
Speaker 2: I totally get what you're saying. It makes sense. I

1359
01:08:08,560 --> 01:08:11,240
Speaker 2: want to also ask about we can't not ask about

1360
01:08:11,240 --> 01:08:13,800
Speaker 2: your mom. I mean, your mom joined that was crazy

1361
01:08:13,840 --> 01:08:14,520
Speaker 2: Bachelor Nation.

1362
01:08:14,600 --> 01:08:17,000
Speaker 3: What was that like for you? As her son?

1363
01:08:17,560 --> 01:08:17,680
Speaker 1: Uh?

1364
01:08:18,360 --> 01:08:21,240
Speaker 4: I was happy for you know, I'm pro like anybody

1365
01:08:21,240 --> 01:08:25,360
Speaker 4: being happy. So like this opportunity made her really excited

1366
01:08:25,400 --> 01:08:29,879
Speaker 4: about something I'd never seen her excited about and dating

1367
01:08:30,040 --> 01:08:33,880
Speaker 4: and getting back out there like and I say never,

1368
01:08:34,000 --> 01:08:36,760
Speaker 4: but like in a long time, because the order you get,

1369
01:08:36,800 --> 01:08:39,800
Speaker 4: the prospects dry up and it's not impossible, but like

1370
01:08:41,360 --> 01:08:43,920
Speaker 4: it's tough. I can't imagine and I can't imagine what

1371
01:08:44,080 --> 01:08:46,600
Speaker 4: mom goes through so like to see the opportunity for

1372
01:08:46,640 --> 01:08:48,760
Speaker 4: that for her. I was stoked. I was I was

1373
01:08:48,800 --> 01:08:49,280
Speaker 4: really happy.

1374
01:08:49,400 --> 01:08:50,519
Speaker 3: Is she bag out? Is she dating?

1375
01:08:50,640 --> 01:08:50,760
Speaker 2: Now?

1376
01:08:51,080 --> 01:08:54,559
Speaker 4: She is? She is out there, Yeah, she's she is dating.

1377
01:08:54,640 --> 01:08:56,080
Speaker 3: So she on like dating apps.

1378
01:08:56,400 --> 01:08:58,559
Speaker 4: I don't think she knows how to use any apps.

1379
01:08:59,360 --> 01:09:02,599
Speaker 3: How does she meet people that she goes on? Reality shows?

1380
01:09:02,680 --> 01:09:02,840
Speaker 4: Yes?

1381
01:09:02,920 --> 01:09:05,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, there's a.

1382
01:09:05,640 --> 01:09:07,759
Speaker 4: Well she This is gonna sound so silly.

1383
01:09:08,360 --> 01:09:10,760
Speaker 3: I know how you preface so much so many of

1384
01:09:10,800 --> 01:09:11,439
Speaker 3: your stories.

1385
01:09:11,720 --> 01:09:13,720
Speaker 4: Well, I about to say it. I'm just like what

1386
01:09:13,760 --> 01:09:16,439
Speaker 4: I was going to say is that like there's oh

1387
01:09:16,479 --> 01:09:20,800
Speaker 4: my gosh, there's a pickleball club that she's in. Now cool,

1388
01:09:21,000 --> 01:09:23,479
Speaker 4: So like there's like, you know, you do stuff like that.

1389
01:09:24,080 --> 01:09:26,800
Speaker 4: And like I'm not saying pickleballs for like retirees, but

1390
01:09:27,080 --> 01:09:29,800
Speaker 4: I love pickleball. But yeah, she does stuff like that.

1391
01:09:29,840 --> 01:09:35,280
Speaker 4: There's like there's she goes to shows, comedy, wine nights,

1392
01:09:35,320 --> 01:09:38,400
Speaker 4: like just events where you can meet people and not

1393
01:09:38,640 --> 01:09:40,960
Speaker 4: all of them are singles, but like you know, if

1394
01:09:41,000 --> 01:09:43,599
Speaker 4: someone meets my mom and they know she's single, they're like, oh,

1395
01:09:43,840 --> 01:09:47,320
Speaker 4: like I know blonde who uh you know, they try

1396
01:09:47,360 --> 01:09:49,200
Speaker 4: to like love, they try to do matchmakers. So I'm

1397
01:09:49,240 --> 01:09:52,080
Speaker 4: like the I tell my mom, she's so comfortable in

1398
01:09:52,120 --> 01:09:55,680
Speaker 4: her in her home, like and her routine. But the

1399
01:09:55,680 --> 01:09:58,920
Speaker 4: more you put yourself out there, I mean you can't.

1400
01:09:59,080 --> 01:10:01,080
Speaker 4: Opportunity just doesn't come to you. Like you've got to

1401
01:10:01,240 --> 01:10:04,160
Speaker 4: present yourself so that things can come your way. So

1402
01:10:04,200 --> 01:10:05,519
Speaker 4: the more she goes out there.

1403
01:10:05,439 --> 01:10:09,320
Speaker 1: And you knew what happened on the show before everybody,

1404
01:10:08,840 --> 01:10:11,160
Speaker 1: So what did you think when you did?

1405
01:10:11,160 --> 01:10:11,240
Speaker 2: You?

1406
01:10:11,400 --> 01:10:12,280
Speaker 3: I assume you watched it.

1407
01:10:12,400 --> 01:10:13,080
Speaker 4: No, I didn't watch.

1408
01:10:13,080 --> 01:10:14,599
Speaker 3: You didn't really you didn't watch?

1409
01:10:14,760 --> 01:10:16,320
Speaker 4: I mean I was bummed, Like I knew it was

1410
01:10:16,320 --> 01:10:19,800
Speaker 4: gonna happen, so like, yeah, I was sad. She called

1411
01:10:19,840 --> 01:10:23,599
Speaker 4: me and she was really upset. And but I mean

1412
01:10:23,720 --> 01:10:26,479
Speaker 4: it's you know, it's it's that's the game, like it's

1413
01:10:26,479 --> 01:10:29,240
Speaker 4: a it wasn't you know, the Patty James Show. It

1414
01:10:29,400 --> 01:10:31,320
Speaker 4: was you know, it's the Bat, it's the Golden Bachelor.

1415
01:10:31,360 --> 01:10:33,720
Speaker 4: So if it wasn't who she ended up with, it

1416
01:10:33,720 --> 01:10:34,960
Speaker 4: wasn't who she was supposed to be with.

1417
01:10:35,120 --> 01:10:36,000
Speaker 3: Did she watch it?

1418
01:10:36,560 --> 01:10:40,600
Speaker 4: She freaking watched every episode?

1419
01:10:40,520 --> 01:10:48,120
Speaker 3: YEA, loved it. Did she like the outcome? Yeah?

1420
01:10:48,200 --> 01:10:51,320
Speaker 4: I mean I think that the outcome was right, But

1421
01:10:51,600 --> 01:10:53,920
Speaker 4: I think that she would have liked a little bit

1422
01:10:53,920 --> 01:10:55,760
Speaker 4: more time to get to that. Yeah, you know what

1423
01:10:55,800 --> 01:10:58,320
Speaker 4: I mean, Like, I think that ultimately it wasn't the

1424
01:10:58,320 --> 01:11:00,439
Speaker 4: person she was supposed to be with, But if there

1425
01:11:00,479 --> 01:11:02,519
Speaker 4: was time to explore that relationship, I think she would

1426
01:11:02,520 --> 01:11:05,439
Speaker 4: have had a little bit more of like a like anybody.

1427
01:11:05,439 --> 01:11:06,640
Speaker 4: I don't think anybody wants to go home in the

1428
01:11:06,640 --> 01:11:07,040
Speaker 4: first night.

1429
01:11:07,160 --> 01:11:09,599
Speaker 1: No, she didn't roll like Hassan. She needs more seven

1430
01:11:09,640 --> 01:11:13,040
Speaker 1: hours to figure it out. What would you say is

1431
01:11:13,080 --> 01:11:17,400
Speaker 1: the current health of the Bachelor Bachelor at franchise? Given that,

1432
01:11:17,479 --> 01:11:19,800
Speaker 1: I mean they were controversies or ratings have been up

1433
01:11:19,840 --> 01:11:22,240
Speaker 1: and down, but now the new season seems like the

1434
01:11:22,560 --> 01:11:25,200
Speaker 1: ratings are solid. The Golden Bachelor was huge. Yeah, but

1435
01:11:25,240 --> 01:11:27,680
Speaker 1: what do you think the health of the franchise is

1436
01:11:27,760 --> 01:11:28,080
Speaker 1: right now?

1437
01:11:28,360 --> 01:11:30,680
Speaker 4: I just think that this has nothing to do with

1438
01:11:30,840 --> 01:11:34,759
Speaker 4: The Bachelor or the Golden Bachelor, the Bachelor or Bachelor

1439
01:11:34,800 --> 01:11:38,479
Speaker 4: in Paradise. There's just so much competition. It's like asking,

1440
01:11:38,600 --> 01:11:40,559
Speaker 4: like what do I think about Red Bull. It's like,

1441
01:11:40,600 --> 01:11:43,559
Speaker 4: you know, they've got Celsius, They've got freaking like, there's

1442
01:11:43,640 --> 01:11:47,240
Speaker 4: so many it's saturated, Like you got Love Island. Love

1443
01:11:47,320 --> 01:11:49,479
Speaker 4: is blind too hot to handle? Like there's a million

1444
01:11:49,520 --> 01:11:51,599
Speaker 4: places that you can go to get that fix. Whereas

1445
01:11:51,600 --> 01:11:55,240
Speaker 4: back in the day the Bachelor and you know, the

1446
01:11:55,320 --> 01:11:56,479
Speaker 4: offsets of it were.

1447
01:11:56,360 --> 01:11:58,840
Speaker 1: It but for the lack of diversity that they try

1448
01:11:58,880 --> 01:12:01,439
Speaker 1: to now improve, or I guess they got the whole

1449
01:12:01,479 --> 01:12:05,080
Speaker 1: situation worked out now for diversifying the contestants, for for

1450
01:12:05,200 --> 01:12:07,400
Speaker 1: all the changes, I guess the tweaks they tried to make.

1451
01:12:07,479 --> 01:12:10,680
Speaker 4: So just looking at the Bachelor, not looking at the pool.

1452
01:12:10,439 --> 01:12:12,679
Speaker 1: Of well, I don't even know about Bachelor in Paradise,

1453
01:12:12,720 --> 01:12:15,640
Speaker 1: but I guess I'm just about Bachelor and Bachelorette the.

1454
01:12:17,280 --> 01:12:20,200
Speaker 3: Favorite. We'll get on that today.

1455
01:12:20,880 --> 01:12:22,720
Speaker 1: But you know, for the health and for what it

1456
01:12:22,800 --> 01:12:26,679
Speaker 1: went through taking some public hits, if you will.

1457
01:12:26,000 --> 01:12:26,639
Speaker 3: Over the years.

1458
01:12:26,760 --> 01:12:29,439
Speaker 4: I think that people like to romanticize things. I think

1459
01:12:29,439 --> 01:12:33,679
Speaker 4: people romanticize, you know, the Yankees when by Ruth Paid

1460
01:12:33,720 --> 01:12:36,400
Speaker 4: played for him. I think that people romanticize the Bulls

1461
01:12:36,400 --> 01:12:39,640
Speaker 4: when Michael Jordan played for him. But the reality is,

1462
01:12:40,439 --> 01:12:44,960
Speaker 4: you know, things change, people change, and your options change.

1463
01:12:45,360 --> 01:12:49,479
Speaker 4: So I think that people romanticize the time where they

1464
01:12:49,640 --> 01:12:52,200
Speaker 4: got a certain they felt a certain feeling from watching

1465
01:12:52,280 --> 01:12:57,760
Speaker 4: the show that you know, you can get that so

1466
01:12:57,800 --> 01:13:00,360
Speaker 4: many different places now, like things change, and like as

1467
01:13:00,400 --> 01:13:05,880
Speaker 4: things change, your perspective has to change. So I think

1468
01:13:05,920 --> 01:13:08,240
Speaker 4: that it's fine. Like I I like as as someone

1469
01:13:08,280 --> 01:13:10,599
Speaker 4: who like is a creative and like tries to think

1470
01:13:10,640 --> 01:13:15,479
Speaker 4: of you know, fun and enticing ways to to showcase

1471
01:13:15,479 --> 01:13:19,880
Speaker 4: food or whatever. Like, I think that, like there's nothing

1472
01:13:19,880 --> 01:13:21,720
Speaker 4: that I think could spice it up anymore than there.

1473
01:13:21,760 --> 01:13:23,360
Speaker 4: I think they're doing a great job. Like, I think

1474
01:13:23,400 --> 01:13:26,720
Speaker 4: it just stinks that, like nowadays, they have competition with

1475
01:13:26,760 --> 01:13:31,960
Speaker 4: all these streaming services and all these like other shows

1476
01:13:31,960 --> 01:13:35,000
Speaker 4: that offer, you know, whatever you want.

1477
01:13:35,040 --> 01:13:37,200
Speaker 3: Would you ever host it or want to host it?

1478
01:13:37,240 --> 01:13:43,599
Speaker 4: Even whatever? I want to host The Bachelor, I wouldn't.

1479
01:13:43,600 --> 01:13:45,720
Speaker 4: I don't think i'd want to host The Bachelor. I

1480
01:13:45,920 --> 01:13:50,000
Speaker 4: think that's an amazing opportunity. I would love to host

1481
01:13:50,080 --> 01:13:54,280
Speaker 4: something like I love interacting with people and having conversations.

1482
01:13:54,320 --> 01:13:55,120
Speaker 3: Why not The Bachelor?

1483
01:13:55,160 --> 01:13:59,720
Speaker 4: Though? The Bachelor, I don't know.

1484
01:13:59,840 --> 01:14:07,600
Speaker 3: I we love the pauses. Mad James is like, I

1485
01:14:07,600 --> 01:14:08,400
Speaker 3: cannot tell a lot.

1486
01:14:08,720 --> 01:14:10,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm just I have to.

1487
01:14:10,080 --> 01:14:13,200
Speaker 3: Be honest and figure out how to best land this well.

1488
01:14:14,280 --> 01:14:16,680
Speaker 4: I want to be honest. I'm I just I just

1489
01:14:16,760 --> 01:14:19,960
Speaker 4: don't see it like what I want to host something

1490
01:14:20,000 --> 01:14:24,559
Speaker 4: absolutely family feud, like a eating contest, but like like

1491
01:14:24,600 --> 01:14:27,320
Speaker 4: there's something, there's a there's a connotation that comes with

1492
01:14:27,439 --> 01:14:32,200
Speaker 4: hosting that, and you put yourself in that, you put

1493
01:14:32,200 --> 01:14:35,200
Speaker 4: yourself back in that atmosphere. And that's the thing I

1494
01:14:35,240 --> 01:14:36,760
Speaker 4: was trying to say that. That was one of the

1495
01:14:36,800 --> 01:14:38,760
Speaker 4: things I was trying to avoid is being in a

1496
01:14:38,800 --> 01:14:42,200
Speaker 4: space that you know is kind of toxic. And I

1497
01:14:42,280 --> 01:14:45,320
Speaker 4: think that if you roll around in that space that

1498
01:14:45,560 --> 01:14:50,240
Speaker 4: you know, you you open yourself up to that because

1499
01:14:50,240 --> 01:14:53,080
Speaker 4: you have to be you have to have an opinion

1500
01:14:53,120 --> 01:14:55,200
Speaker 4: on things, and like it just.

1501
01:14:56,640 --> 01:14:58,360
Speaker 3: When you roll around in the mud, you get dirty.

1502
01:14:58,520 --> 01:15:00,400
Speaker 4: Yeah I don't, No, I I.

1503
01:15:02,840 --> 01:15:04,200
Speaker 3: Why is that so funny?

1504
01:15:04,800 --> 01:15:06,720
Speaker 1: Tell you all the time. You're the funniest person I know,

1505
01:15:07,479 --> 01:15:09,000
Speaker 1: you really are.

1506
01:15:09,439 --> 01:15:12,000
Speaker 2: Oh, what what's next for you? We I love following

1507
01:15:12,000 --> 01:15:14,880
Speaker 2: your adventures. You're a world traveler and you certainly like

1508
01:15:14,920 --> 01:15:16,880
Speaker 2: to eat. What's next for you?

1509
01:15:20,720 --> 01:15:23,599
Speaker 4: Where do I start? I've I love running. It's just

1510
01:15:23,680 --> 01:15:27,519
Speaker 4: been like my peace place. Uh and so yeah, I'm

1511
01:15:27,520 --> 01:15:29,120
Speaker 4: gonna try to run the London. Well, I'm going to

1512
01:15:29,160 --> 01:15:29,679
Speaker 4: run the London.

1513
01:15:29,680 --> 01:15:32,439
Speaker 3: May I think you're gonna Yeah, You're gonna probably succeed at.

1514
01:15:32,320 --> 01:15:35,200
Speaker 4: That I'm gonna run the London Marathon. I'm gonna try

1515
01:15:35,240 --> 01:15:37,320
Speaker 4: to get Rachel into a race. We're gonna get her

1516
01:15:37,320 --> 01:15:41,639
Speaker 4: in a five k Yeah, down in Disney, Disney five k.

1517
01:15:42,080 --> 01:15:44,479
Speaker 4: It's a nice she loves Disney, so like any way

1518
01:15:44,520 --> 01:15:47,800
Speaker 4: to like entice her into you know, not being mad

1519
01:15:47,800 --> 01:15:50,400
Speaker 4: about me buying so many running shoes, Like, we figure

1520
01:15:50,400 --> 01:15:50,920
Speaker 4: out a way that.

1521
01:15:50,880 --> 01:15:52,280
Speaker 1: We would love to run with you down at that

1522
01:15:52,320 --> 01:15:54,439
Speaker 1: five k. I don't think we're allowed on the parks

1523
01:15:54,560 --> 01:15:58,320
Speaker 1: crowns anymore. I don't think we'll check, well, right last

1524
01:15:58,320 --> 01:16:00,320
Speaker 1: week check if we weren't. But we'll pick you in

1525
01:16:00,360 --> 01:16:02,040
Speaker 1: some cool Disney costume we can all.

1526
01:16:02,080 --> 01:16:07,160
Speaker 4: I'll be frozened, missing crediblej can throw a beard?

1527
01:16:08,520 --> 01:16:09,880
Speaker 3: Is there another one? That's the other one?

1528
01:16:09,880 --> 01:16:14,360
Speaker 4: I could be this is hilarious, you could be this

1529
01:16:14,439 --> 01:16:19,280
Speaker 4: is the princess and the frog. What's the bad guy's name? Nice?

1530
01:16:19,800 --> 01:16:20,800
Speaker 3: Let's not finish this.

1531
01:16:21,520 --> 01:16:21,920
Speaker 1: That's not.

1532
01:16:24,000 --> 01:16:28,160
Speaker 5: He's a good looking brother, dude, I got no problem

1533
01:16:28,280 --> 01:16:30,559
Speaker 5: just trying to label me even as a cartoon villain,

1534
01:16:31,640 --> 01:16:36,280
Speaker 5: stale man, many of us you know what you know

1535
01:16:36,320 --> 01:16:39,639
Speaker 5: what you take proa.

1536
01:16:41,479 --> 01:16:43,519
Speaker 3: Wait, London marathon? What marathon? Will that be for you.

1537
01:16:43,560 --> 01:16:44,280
Speaker 2: How many of you run?

1538
01:16:45,040 --> 01:16:49,760
Speaker 4: That'll be London Marathon will be like number six. But

1539
01:16:49,960 --> 01:16:52,960
Speaker 4: I'm trying to get I'm gonna do all the major

1540
01:16:53,080 --> 01:16:53,400
Speaker 4: Oh I.

1541
01:16:53,360 --> 01:16:54,240
Speaker 3: Wanted to do that too.

1542
01:16:54,840 --> 01:16:55,840
Speaker 4: We can still do all right?

1543
01:16:55,920 --> 01:16:57,519
Speaker 3: Yeah, what have you done? Major wise?

1544
01:16:57,920 --> 01:17:02,559
Speaker 4: Boston, Chicago, New York? But I want to hit sub

1545
01:17:02,640 --> 01:17:04,800
Speaker 4: three and all of them, so like, oh, yeah, I

1546
01:17:04,840 --> 01:17:05,559
Speaker 4: gotta go for it.

1547
01:17:05,840 --> 01:17:07,880
Speaker 2: I gotta go for Boston is the one that scares me.

1548
01:17:07,880 --> 01:17:09,280
Speaker 2: That's the one I'm going to leave till the end.

1549
01:17:09,320 --> 01:17:11,439
Speaker 2: I've done Chicago, New York, Berlin.

1550
01:17:11,560 --> 01:17:14,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, I've done the flat one yeah, and then the home.

1551
01:17:14,840 --> 01:17:16,120
Speaker 3: I'm so afraid of Boston.

1552
01:17:16,240 --> 01:17:18,200
Speaker 4: You just trained the hills and you'll be fine. Just

1553
01:17:18,240 --> 01:17:19,439
Speaker 4: do the lap in Central Park.

1554
01:17:19,240 --> 01:17:20,960
Speaker 1: Point you get London. What do you got so Tokyo

1555
01:17:21,000 --> 01:17:23,280
Speaker 1: and what's have Tokyo? Berlin, Berlin in London.

1556
01:17:24,000 --> 01:17:26,840
Speaker 4: But I gotta do Chicago, Boston and New York again

1557
01:17:26,920 --> 01:17:28,640
Speaker 4: because I have to get under three. You don't have to,

1558
01:17:28,760 --> 01:17:29,240
Speaker 4: but I need to.

1559
01:17:29,520 --> 01:17:30,720
Speaker 3: Oh my god, you want to?

1560
01:17:30,800 --> 01:17:33,680
Speaker 4: I'm yeah. But then I've been doing a lot of

1561
01:17:33,720 --> 01:17:36,040
Speaker 4: other fun stuff too. I I got to host a

1562
01:17:36,080 --> 01:17:37,680
Speaker 4: bunch of different things this year, and that was a

1563
01:17:37,680 --> 01:17:39,759
Speaker 4: lot of fun, Just like getting to pick other people's

1564
01:17:39,760 --> 01:17:42,320
Speaker 4: brain and sit across from people that I respect and

1565
01:17:43,400 --> 01:17:48,040
Speaker 4: have important conversations and get people to think about an

1566
01:17:48,040 --> 01:17:52,760
Speaker 4: important topic differently than how they came into it. So, yeah,

1567
01:17:52,800 --> 01:17:53,240
Speaker 4: that's fun.

1568
01:17:54,000 --> 01:17:55,280
Speaker 3: What here's my favorite thing.

1569
01:17:55,360 --> 01:17:58,080
Speaker 2: We've joked about this, but when you're in broadcasting, usually

1570
01:17:58,360 --> 01:18:00,559
Speaker 2: one of the questions that producers have you act, oh God,

1571
01:18:00,760 --> 01:18:04,880
Speaker 2: somebody here, is there anything that we didn't ask you

1572
01:18:05,760 --> 01:18:08,320
Speaker 2: that you'd like to let the listeners know?

1573
01:18:09,000 --> 01:18:14,479
Speaker 4: Oh? Yeah, that's great. I mean, honestly, all I'd have

1574
01:18:15,040 --> 01:18:17,120
Speaker 4: you already. We tackled this already. But the thing that

1575
01:18:17,120 --> 01:18:19,439
Speaker 4: I would want to leave people with is just to

1576
01:18:19,479 --> 01:18:22,519
Speaker 4: have grace on themselves and on others, because life is

1577
01:18:22,560 --> 01:18:26,639
Speaker 4: hard and people are good, and we make mistakes, and

1578
01:18:27,560 --> 01:18:31,280
Speaker 4: if you are perfect, then this doesn't apply to you.

1579
01:18:32,520 --> 01:18:32,760
Speaker 3: Ha ha.

1580
01:18:35,160 --> 01:18:38,280
Speaker 1: Isn't it something we are We are so quick to

1581
01:18:38,400 --> 01:18:41,519
Speaker 1: judge everybody else by their worst mistakes, and we judge

1582
01:18:41,520 --> 01:18:45,720
Speaker 1: ourselves by our best intentions. And we've learned this more

1583
01:18:45,760 --> 01:18:48,400
Speaker 1: and more over the past year, and it's funny, and

1584
01:18:48,439 --> 01:18:50,639
Speaker 1: mattaw I have said it to you privately tons of times,

1585
01:18:50,680 --> 01:18:52,320
Speaker 1: and this is an opportunity I think it might be

1586
01:18:52,320 --> 01:18:53,800
Speaker 1: the first opportunity I've had to say it to you

1587
01:18:53,840 --> 01:18:56,400
Speaker 1: in a public format. But it meant everything to me.

1588
01:18:56,880 --> 01:18:58,920
Speaker 1: You meant everything to me in the worst stretch of

1589
01:18:58,960 --> 01:19:05,679
Speaker 1: my personal life professional life, right even to get that message,

1590
01:19:05,720 --> 01:19:08,120
Speaker 1: to get even when I didn't respond to you, to

1591
01:19:08,160 --> 01:19:11,800
Speaker 1: get a follow up, to have you just say how

1592
01:19:11,840 --> 01:19:13,479
Speaker 1: you doing or I'm here?

1593
01:19:13,800 --> 01:19:14,200
Speaker 3: You didn't.

1594
01:19:14,240 --> 01:19:15,600
Speaker 1: You didn't say, hey, what do you need? You know,

1595
01:19:15,640 --> 01:19:17,080
Speaker 1: what can I bring you? I want to do this.

1596
01:19:17,280 --> 01:19:20,160
Speaker 1: You didn't even give me some Bible quote right, just

1597
01:19:20,439 --> 01:19:24,439
Speaker 1: I'm here. That meant everything to me at that time.

1598
01:19:24,520 --> 01:19:26,920
Speaker 1: And I know you could relate to a lot of

1599
01:19:26,920 --> 01:19:28,960
Speaker 1: what was going on with me and was going on

1600
01:19:29,040 --> 01:19:32,720
Speaker 1: with Robes at the time. Brother, it meant everything. So

1601
01:19:32,840 --> 01:19:37,040
Speaker 1: I encourage you and anybody else listening, man, pick up

1602
01:19:37,040 --> 01:19:40,680
Speaker 1: your phone right this moment and check on somebody just

1603
01:19:40,720 --> 01:19:43,400
Speaker 1: to stay hi, who's going through? But brother, it meant

1604
01:19:43,920 --> 01:19:45,640
Speaker 1: everything to me and one of the worst parts of

1605
01:19:45,640 --> 01:19:47,439
Speaker 1: my life that you, well I wasn't that close to

1606
01:19:47,520 --> 01:19:50,120
Speaker 1: even at the time. I don't, yeah, but to be

1607
01:19:50,200 --> 01:19:52,720
Speaker 1: there and show up for me was everything. So this

1608
01:19:52,800 --> 01:19:56,240
Speaker 1: is love you, brother, and I'm always rooting for you

1609
01:19:56,280 --> 01:19:57,960
Speaker 1: and rooting for Rachel and whatever comes.

1610
01:19:58,000 --> 01:20:00,040
Speaker 3: Man, but you've it meant a.

1611
01:20:00,479 --> 01:20:02,320
Speaker 4: I love you too, bro. I appreciate you having me.

1612
01:20:02,560 --> 01:20:03,880
Speaker 4: Thank you, Amy, thank you.

1613
01:20:04,840 --> 01:20:06,559
Speaker 3: Oh you have that look on your face.

1614
01:20:07,400 --> 01:20:09,000
Speaker 2: Well you know I was gonna even say, like, thank

1615
01:20:09,040 --> 01:20:12,680
Speaker 2: you just as TJ's girlfriend, which I know you love

1616
01:20:12,720 --> 01:20:15,479
Speaker 2: that word, but thank you for being there for him

1617
01:20:15,800 --> 01:20:18,479
Speaker 2: because I could be there for him obviously as his girlfriend,

1618
01:20:18,479 --> 01:20:21,040
Speaker 2: but to have the support he needed from other people

1619
01:20:21,080 --> 01:20:23,559
Speaker 2: and especially from someone like you, was everything. Like it

1620
01:20:23,640 --> 01:20:27,120
Speaker 2: really did make a huge difference. And yeah, you showed

1621
01:20:27,200 --> 01:20:28,120
Speaker 2: up at my birthday party.

1622
01:20:28,200 --> 01:20:30,280
Speaker 4: I was going to say it's I was going to

1623
01:20:30,320 --> 01:20:33,800
Speaker 4: say that like it takes it's it's both ways though,

1624
01:20:33,920 --> 01:20:36,679
Speaker 4: because like TJ could have said, like, man, forget this guy,

1625
01:20:37,120 --> 01:20:39,639
Speaker 4: because like you know, in that moment, you don't want

1626
01:20:39,640 --> 01:20:41,240
Speaker 4: to talk to anybody, But you guys invited me in,

1627
01:20:41,400 --> 01:20:43,840
Speaker 4: and I appreciate you because I've gotten to see I've

1628
01:20:43,840 --> 01:20:45,600
Speaker 4: gotten to experience your life and how rich it is.

1629
01:20:45,720 --> 01:20:48,559
Speaker 4: So it's been it's been amazing. Like anytime I get

1630
01:20:48,560 --> 01:20:52,160
Speaker 4: invited over to y'all's apartment, I will accept that invitation

1631
01:20:52,240 --> 01:20:54,800
Speaker 4: with open arms because I'm going to be around friends

1632
01:20:54,800 --> 01:20:55,560
Speaker 4: and family.

1633
01:20:55,320 --> 01:20:58,040
Speaker 3: Still have that bottle of tequila.

1634
01:20:58,080 --> 01:21:00,920
Speaker 1: You still have that cover from the Mary. You showed up.

1635
01:21:00,920 --> 01:21:02,479
Speaker 1: You showed up after the marathon.

1636
01:21:03,280 --> 01:21:05,320
Speaker 4: I came. I came after the marathon in my cape.

1637
01:21:05,640 --> 01:21:08,559
Speaker 1: Yeah mind you. This was like seven hours after the race.

1638
01:21:08,600 --> 01:21:11,960
Speaker 1: He still ain't been in the shower. He's show up.

1639
01:21:12,439 --> 01:21:16,479
Speaker 4: You know when when you run the marathon. I if

1640
01:21:16,520 --> 01:21:18,960
Speaker 4: you run the marathon, I'll wear that metal for a week.

1641
01:21:20,400 --> 01:21:21,519
Speaker 4: I'm like, I ran the marathon.

1642
01:21:21,720 --> 01:21:22,520
Speaker 3: You're a superhero.

1643
01:21:22,680 --> 01:21:25,559
Speaker 4: Oh this Cape? Oh yeah, I just ran the marathon.

1644
01:21:27,200 --> 01:21:28,000
Speaker 3: Doesn't it feel good?

1645
01:21:28,000 --> 01:21:28,200
Speaker 4: Though?

1646
01:21:28,240 --> 01:21:29,960
Speaker 2: Afterwards you're walking through the streets of New York and

1647
01:21:30,000 --> 01:21:32,600
Speaker 2: everyone's like congratulations, and you're like, hell yeah, thank you

1648
01:21:32,680 --> 01:21:33,800
Speaker 2: very much because I earned this.

1649
01:21:33,960 --> 01:21:36,920
Speaker 4: It's the best Rachel. Rachel was ready to just like

1650
01:21:38,400 --> 01:21:40,840
Speaker 4: light that Cape on fire just because anybody, no one

1651
01:21:40,880 --> 01:21:42,920
Speaker 4: was even saying it that walk like, oh me ran

1652
01:21:42,960 --> 01:21:46,000
Speaker 4: the marathon, thank you. I was playing into it at

1653
01:21:46,000 --> 01:21:46,400
Speaker 4: that point.

1654
01:21:47,920 --> 01:21:50,840
Speaker 1: Man. We are We absolutely will have you back on.

1655
01:21:51,160 --> 01:21:53,040
Speaker 1: We'll get We'll get Rachel in here at some point.

1656
01:21:53,080 --> 01:21:53,599
Speaker 4: You gotta get her.

1657
01:21:53,640 --> 01:21:55,880
Speaker 1: I So we'll get her in here minus you, and

1658
01:21:56,120 --> 01:21:58,400
Speaker 1: we'll bring y'all together and see how the stories match

1659
01:21:58,520 --> 01:21:59,719
Speaker 1: up at some point.

1660
01:22:00,240 --> 01:22:03,720
Speaker 4: Dang, that would be the truth test if I was

1661
01:22:03,760 --> 01:22:04,439
Speaker 4: fibbing or not.

1662
01:22:05,040 --> 01:22:07,880
Speaker 1: Brother, appreciate everything, and folks, you know where to find Matt,

1663
01:22:07,920 --> 01:22:09,360
Speaker 1: you know where to find Robot, you know where to

1664
01:22:09,360 --> 01:22:11,880
Speaker 1: find me. We're all on TikTok all on Instagram. You

1665
01:22:11,920 --> 01:22:14,400
Speaker 1: can find the show at Amy and TJ podcast. But

1666
01:22:14,840 --> 01:22:17,479
Speaker 1: like you said, spread some love, check all those you love,

1667
01:22:17,920 --> 01:22:19,200
Speaker 1: and we'll see you back here next time.