Speaker 1: Portions of This is Americans Life, the improvised documentary podcast,
Speaker 1: are brought to you by listeners like yourself, are esteemed sponsors,
Speaker 1: and the all powerful, all knowing Random Sentence Generator, which
Speaker 1: inspires the stories you're about to hear. Yes, whenever you
Speaker 1: hear this sound, the next sentence you hear is a
Speaker 1: random sentence provided by our revered, omnipotent random sentence Generator.
Speaker 1: For more This is Americans Live. Listened to more episodes
Speaker 1: of This is Americans Live. I Guess and now your
Speaker 1: first random sentence. Kangarosages rabbits on steroids. That's what genealogists
Speaker 1: were claiming, Not that they had any background and rabbit genealogy,
Speaker 1: but they were taking a stab at it and this
Speaker 1: is the outcome that they came up with. A lot
Speaker 1: of people were critical of using a sort of like
Speaker 1: common phrase like on steroids, right that that that kind
Speaker 1: of approach loss system little credibility as far as like
Speaker 1: getting the work published. But once we did establish that yes,
Speaker 1: kangaroos were indeed like rabbits on steroids, we went back
Speaker 1: and we worked with some different scientists who focus on
Speaker 1: laga morphs, which we all know our rabbits. Everyone. You
Speaker 1: had a harder time getting people on your side because
Speaker 1: in your first article you said, why a rabbits choosing?
Speaker 1: And it's not carrots. Yes, we were taking an attempt
Speaker 1: at humor, right, which is not what our strong suit is. No. No,
Speaker 1: we spent the first three months just trying to come
Speaker 1: up with some humorous approach to the to the study.
Speaker 1: And we don't really have a vast knowledge of drugs
Speaker 1: in general. So that's why everything is steroids. I mean,
Speaker 1: I don't even know what else is out there for Well,
Speaker 1: someone else said that maybe it's on cocaine, or maybe
Speaker 1: it's one. I don't think you've pronounced that first one cocaine.
Speaker 1: Oh yes, yes, right, cocaine, not not cocaine, which is
Speaker 1: the ingredient in coca cola. A lot of people don't
Speaker 1: know that. They keep going on and on about the
Speaker 1: pronunciation of cocaine, really focusing on the little rabbit in
Speaker 1: the room, the fact that they were trying to start
Speaker 1: a whole new science that didn't even exist. Well, I
Speaker 1: think an honor is clearly a weasel on steroids. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and a and a giraffe is a horse on steroids,
Speaker 1: and a rat is a mouse, several mice actually on
Speaker 1: steroid wearing a rat suit, and a man is a fish.
Speaker 1: Over millions and millions years of using steroids, you think
Speaker 1: maybe the fact that both you guys lost your jobs
Speaker 1: at the big major dab. He's just trying to find
Speaker 1: a way to make money by creating studies or studying
Speaker 1: things that nobody really cares about, because he's trying to
Speaker 1: make an income. That question was like a statement on steroids.
Speaker 1: It really did feel like an indictment of our dignity
Speaker 1: on steroids. Is this is American's life? I mean sorry?
Speaker 1: With producer Andy, our special guest contributor for this episode
Speaker 1: is Brian Husky. In our show, we'll be using our
Speaker 1: trustee random sentence generator to bring you a story in
Speaker 1: three improvised acts. This week's theme duality. Everything that you
Speaker 1: think you know about yourself, there's always the opposite side
Speaker 1: of the spectrum to your personality. There is a dark
Speaker 1: and a light, happy and sad. A batman and Bruce
Speaker 1: Wayne say with us, You're gonna say Robin Act one,
Speaker 1: the secret ingredient There's wonderful life was crime nobody knew,
Speaker 1: not his family and not his friends. Everybody else. He
Speaker 1: was just a neighborhood guy who had a family in
Speaker 1: a regular job. But at night, Thomas had a habit.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I just gotta call. I gotta, I gotta
Speaker 1: go out. Well, I just said dinner down. I know,
Speaker 1: I just gotta call, right, can help me with my homeworker?
Speaker 1: Or no, daddy's got to go out again? What? Dad
Speaker 1: just came back home from being out. I know what
Speaker 1: I have very important erin run. What I could help
Speaker 1: you with it? We could do it after dinner. Is
Speaker 1: a family that would be that very time sensitive. Let's
Speaker 1: do it now, right, we could pick up some food. This,
Speaker 1: I can just put this back in the the cast role.
Speaker 1: It's easy to store. That's why I making so many
Speaker 1: of them. I just don't want to do it right now. Okay,
Speaker 1: we're gonna do this now. I don't want to know what.
Speaker 1: You don't want to do this now, but the family
Speaker 1: needs time together. You guys getting a divorce? No, sweet,
Speaker 1: we're not getting a divorce. Divorce, No, we're not. Just
Speaker 1: Sometimes adults have responsibilities to their family, and then they
Speaker 1: have responsibilities to mysterious things that they never explain. I'm
Speaker 1: never going to leave if you're a month, you don't know,
Speaker 1: I'll just try to go where the funk you want. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's like fucking he said, you're gonna be just like
Speaker 1: fucking how the time is right now in the back. Yeah,
Speaker 1: by six fift day and a six fifth day? How
Speaker 1: many that I'm going to not only many many And
Speaker 1: it's Jerry, Jerry's Louis, it's Louis do. Yeah, we're the triplets.
Speaker 1: They all sound the same. You know that. Yeah, you
Speaker 1: know that, all four of you. I'm trying get this
Speaker 1: is this is Jerry, all right, you get you get
Speaker 1: right now? All right? You don't the kid and the girl,
Speaker 1: I don't know if you're married to her. I've gotten
Speaker 1: into that by your life exactly. We haven't talked and
Speaker 1: we haven't bonded yet. We've been working. Are you okay? Well,
Speaker 1: the gratulation you will go down to, so you get
Speaker 1: down yet. Trying, guys, I'll be right that there I've
Speaker 1: not criminals. That was not carminals. When this in me
Speaker 1: be talking to, I mean that was is that your
Speaker 1: white van outside? Hold on, I gotta make up. I
Speaker 1: gotta make a call real quick. I guess I'll put
Speaker 1: in the oven. It seems like it's gonna win those nine.
Speaker 1: Please please just call this work. You have your wire,
Speaker 1: you don't. Don't do that. When you do that, it
Speaker 1: hurts my ears wearing headphones asking he's wearing his wire?
Speaker 1: Is that Jimmy, it's Jimmy, Yes, it's it's it's Agent Jimmy.
Speaker 1: Terry there too, Agent Terry is here too. Yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: here too. Barry there, I got the twins and then
Speaker 1: the sidekick A four. Just hang out. You had to
Speaker 1: bring Agent Barry because you know I don't bring Agent
Speaker 1: Berry this button. Do you need me here for this?
Speaker 1: I just was calling to tell you that you should
Speaker 1: probably move the rand alot. I want you to understand
Speaker 1: something what you have to deliver to us, but we
Speaker 1: asked you to deliver to us. Otherwise our deals off
Speaker 1: and you don't get the today of immunity, the legal deal.
Speaker 1: I mean a little bit of a pinch here. I've
Speaker 1: got all of us are on a pinch. But you
Speaker 1: know who's gonna get pinched? You, my friend, sweetheart. This
Speaker 1: is the last thing I'm going to say to you.
Speaker 1: If I leave this cast role in the oven any longer,
Speaker 1: it's going to be dry all right, it is going
Speaker 1: to be a dry chicken Caesar casserole. Okay, the second
Speaker 1: time chicken has gone dry castle. All right, you know
Speaker 1: what family of mine? I say, we all sit down
Speaker 1: to a nice quick family dinner. There we go, and son,
Speaker 1: that's how you have a healthy relationship. You come to
Speaker 1: see what your partner and your your dependence needs are
Speaker 1: such a quick quick dinner. All right, let's join hands
Speaker 1: and have a quick prayer. All right, okay, quick, Lord
Speaker 1: our father who are in heaven and also in each
Speaker 1: of our individual hearts, thank you for the food and
Speaker 1: for the protection we feel from our home, our community.
Speaker 1: And now I'd like to pass it off to my son,
Speaker 1: who I know has a few things on the table,
Speaker 1: like a new girl in his life that I know
Speaker 1: he would love to press. I like her a lot,
Speaker 1: you know. I think that she likes me and and
Speaker 1: and I think that maybe that if I, you know,
Speaker 1: do better, I think that I'll be. I think that
Speaker 1: we could be if you you let her know who
Speaker 1: you I let her know who I. I can't remember
Speaker 1: what you told me. Let her know who you are,
Speaker 1: how specially special I am, and that you have a
Speaker 1: golden heart, that God has touched himself, that I have
Speaker 1: a I have a golden heart, and that God has
Speaker 1: touched you, has touched him, touched the heart, touched my heart.
Speaker 1: That fire outside. I gotta run outside real quick, you know,
Speaker 1: I put a pin in that. I'll be back guy,
Speaker 1: and amen, all right, I'll slowly or of the salad.
Speaker 1: Here it was clear that he was playing three sides
Speaker 1: of the kin, his family, the FBI, and this organized
Speaker 1: crime syndicate that he had somehow organized on his own,
Speaker 1: not knowing that he had started his own mafia. Alright,
Speaker 1: I'm looking for four good guys who can pull off
Speaker 1: some ice. Who the fuck are you? Yeah, my name
Speaker 1: is Thomas. Yeah Thomas. You don't walk into a pool
Speaker 1: hall and just say, hey, I'm looking for three guys
Speaker 1: or wet four guys. I'm looking for four guys and
Speaker 1: just say I'm looking for guys to do, Like what
Speaker 1: do you to do? What? I know? I know? You
Speaker 1: just come up like like I don't even know if
Speaker 1: you're criminals. I'm assuming you're a criminal because you're in
Speaker 1: a pool hall playing pool in the afternoon. That that's
Speaker 1: disrespectful to us. I'm offensive. I feel like we got
Speaker 1: off on the wrong foot. Yeah, let's let me just
Speaker 1: just give me one. Can I give you a tip? Hello?
Speaker 1: My name is Thomas. What is your fucking name? All right?
Speaker 1: Sounds good. I bought some fucking manners, No, not to self,
Speaker 1: have more manners. Introduced myself first. Hey, why are you
Speaker 1: saying that into the tape recording? What do you adopted? You? No? No, no, no,
Speaker 1: you just like got a luddite. There's got a walkman,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I'm just scratching, scratch a little bit,
Speaker 1: all right, I get it. You got a pastmaker. I
Speaker 1: don't work. I don't work with fucking weak hearted pussies
Speaker 1: like you like blow into my chest every once in
Speaker 1: a while and tap it. Alright, alright, all everything, all right,
Speaker 1: let's start this over because we're you know, we're a
Speaker 1: little up on the cocaine right now. It's cocaine. It's
Speaker 1: very much cocaine. I think that he's pronounced. Could you
Speaker 1: tell me how you pronounce that again? But let's say
Speaker 1: it into my chest. You know, the word, independent of
Speaker 1: any other usage or relationship to my life. You just
Speaker 1: say it cocaine. All right, But can you use that
Speaker 1: word in a sentence like maybe like yeah, sure, all right, mind,
Speaker 1: I'm saying the word cocaine. You can state your full
Speaker 1: name and then me what you know about Yeah, sure,
Speaker 1: here I go. My full name is Vinny the Zippa Patucci.
Speaker 1: And this is my dog Cocaine, which is I actually
Speaker 1: was thinking it was. That name is for a dog.
Speaker 1: It's fun, right, you know what. Let's start fresh. Let's
Speaker 1: go around the room. Everyone tell me their full names,
Speaker 1: literally the entire pool. There are thirty duty just you four,
Speaker 1: just you four, the triplet's, and you go around the room.
Speaker 1: Help me your full name, use the word cocaine in
Speaker 1: a sentence, preferably one that would end the cage. How
Speaker 1: often you come in contact? Alright, alright man, I'm Joe
Speaker 1: Sih also known as Joey Bones. And that's Vinny and
Speaker 1: his budda Vidi and his VICI. Yeah we changed their names.
Speaker 1: You didn't know. Yeah, we were Jerry, Benny and Terry.
Speaker 1: I think it's a name. Hang back for just one second.
Speaker 1: Sure they have changed their names, so triple let's have
Speaker 1: changed their names. I repeat, The triplets have changed their names.
Speaker 1: I repeat a third time, the triplets they changed their
Speaker 1: names again? Hello, they left me in the times. You're
Speaker 1: the only agent, Liz Berry. For the rest of them.
Speaker 1: They went out. They said, this guy doesn't know what
Speaker 1: he's doing. I think they went out for in and out. Berry,
Speaker 1: Is there a pen nearby? I need to write this
Speaker 1: down for them when they come back. Well, let me
Speaker 1: look around. Okay, we're gonna make a quick diggressive scar Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: go on, all right, thank you very special agent Berry.
Speaker 1: Can you write this down please? The triplets T R
Speaker 1: I P L E T S. Trip. I'm gonna approximate.
Speaker 1: Just write the number three three and then draw a
Speaker 1: draw stick figure with an angry face on his face
Speaker 1: to somewhere else, just to make sure there's a frown
Speaker 1: in there so they know that the three equals they're
Speaker 1: bad guys, sad people. How am I going to get
Speaker 1: this kind of What are you talking to yourself like that? Blow? Blow?
Speaker 1: Blow up, scratch scratchmaker. This guy is obsessed with cocaine,
Speaker 1: and he said, cocaine blow? What's up with you? You
Speaker 1: got a problem? You're right, I obsised with cocaine. I'm
Speaker 1: sure doers are a new word. I got something, Harry right,
Speaker 1: the Stark. Eventually Tom Thomas. Eventually Tom was successful in
Speaker 1: Thomas called me Thomas Christ because my fucking show. Eventually,
Speaker 1: Tom Thomas, successful in rounding up, comins to work on
Speaker 1: his team. Believe the triplets they were on their first job,
Speaker 1: Casey had joined. Al Right, here we go outside Generald
Speaker 1: Dane's packing and shipping. Here they have a safe in
Speaker 1: the back. Why did you just say we're outside? We know,
Speaker 1: outside of jail. Yeah, I know, I know how I
Speaker 1: got you. I know I know where I'm sitting. But
Speaker 1: then he told like, look, guys, I like to I
Speaker 1: like to narrate my own life. You know, he's I
Speaker 1: don't know why the funk he's doing this is making
Speaker 1: me feel a weird. You know, maybe I'm gonna put
Speaker 1: a pill in this guy's fucking head. You know what.
Speaker 1: I like to narrate, either when I'm pooping or I'm
Speaker 1: making love. I hate you doing it in the bathroom
Speaker 1: all the time. Nothing, Yeah, both things right, And I'll
Speaker 1: let it. I'll let people know what's going on. I'll say,
Speaker 1: here I am in the toilet, and here it comes. Oh,
Speaker 1: here comes that magic rope coming out of me. You know,
Speaker 1: some people don't like that kind of talk, but it
Speaker 1: helps me. It relaxes me, and the same thing for
Speaker 1: the lady. You know what I'm in. The lady is
Speaker 1: like here it comes to my magic rope, which I
Speaker 1: that indicates my penis. I like pushing both things a
Speaker 1: little bit. All right, what you want to start it?
Speaker 1: Talking to yourself? Yeah, I was talking to all of us,
Speaker 1: talking to the world's of stage. I was talking to
Speaker 1: the audience that is the rest of the right the
Speaker 1: shipping place. What is safe in the back? Safe in
Speaker 1: the back? I am trying to think of how we
Speaker 1: should break in and crack that safe. I wish I
Speaker 1: knew if anybody had some experience doing that. This is
Speaker 1: a pool hall question. Seriously, you don't come to the
Speaker 1: and be like, how are we gonna do it? You know?
Speaker 1: Have you ever done this ship before? Yes? What names
Speaker 1: some jobs you've done? Some recent one? Yeah, names some jobs.
Speaker 1: Name a job. One job. He has a gun to
Speaker 1: your fucking hit buck, Name a job. Nice narration, Thank
Speaker 1: you Gerald, Dean's car wash. Gerald is not part of it.
Speaker 1: Like a hold on, shut up, shut up, shut up,
Speaker 1: shut the funks. My private phone. Hello, this is the Zippa.
Speaker 1: It's Agent Ferry. Hey, Hey, guys, I'm sorry it's my niece.
Speaker 1: It's Keith Signera. I gotta take it. Tell her congratulate.
Speaker 1: What do you say for a kid congratulating? All right? Hello?
Speaker 1: Did he tell you what he did? Listen, I'm on it. Okay,
Speaker 1: he's about to use the same Geraldine's him? Where Geraldine shipping?
Speaker 1: You know what happens if you don't get the information,
Speaker 1: you go alright bye, sweetheart. I think that dress sounds great.
Speaker 1: That was my niece, you know, Keira, you know, I
Speaker 1: gotta tire you. Your niece sounds like somebody I know
Speaker 1: what she's a fifty say, you know my good my niece. Yeah, yes,
Speaker 1: I know a lot of you, your old girls. Oh shit,
Speaker 1: I'm holding a knife to your neck now, this is
Speaker 1: me nar rating. Yeah, you take that back, I bro, bro, Okay,
Speaker 1: I don't I don't know your niece. I gotta make
Speaker 1: a quick calls, right, just one second. Hello, it's Verry
Speaker 1: Perry Um Thomas hair. Yeah. I always saw I came
Speaker 1: up on the on the idea. I got your picture
Speaker 1: on there, so so hey, I was on the job here. Um,
Speaker 1: I know I see you. I see you on the
Speaker 1: screen only informing you have the others. I can't tell you.
Speaker 1: I mean, you knew when you're coming into the informant
Speaker 1: game that you might be killing your best friend. Y,
Speaker 1: why you're good boy? Tell me if you're working with
Speaker 1: other informants. I'm not in a position at I mean,
Speaker 1: you could talk to my higher up if you want
Speaker 1: to take that. The FBI, he spoke to the first
Speaker 1: spader FBI. Oh, yes, it's it's the It's just the main,
Speaker 1: the main operator. The English Press one, the Spanish Press two,
Speaker 1: English English. You have reached the FBI. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: speak to an agent Press one. I thought I was one.
Speaker 1: Enter your zip code now or I'm sorry, you've exceeded
Speaker 1: the time limit. O my god, how do I go back? Agent? Agent? Agent? Hello, fion,
Speaker 1: what's the nature of your national emergency? Um? Yeah, Hi,
Speaker 1: my name is Thomas. Get my picture. Yeah, it's pretty easy.
Speaker 1: It's called Google. Anyway. I'm out here on a job
Speaker 1: and uh, all right, on the job. I'm trying to
Speaker 1: I'm working with these guys. I think it's expect they
Speaker 1: might be this guy named Barry. I'm working with him.
Speaker 1: He's might one of my he's on special like offecial
Speaker 1: Asian Berry. You just tell me what I'm gonna say.
Speaker 1: You're finding out if Berry is a working a angle
Speaker 1: on you, if he's working with two two independent undercover operatives. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we're on top of it. You're not Thomas, and you're
Speaker 1: coming dangerously close to having the thing you don't want
Speaker 1: to have happened happened to you. Wait wait, wait, wait,
Speaker 1: proceed with the execution of the procedure, and if you
Speaker 1: do not buy weeks in, well we all know what's
Speaker 1: gonna happen. Oh God, thank you for calling the FBI.
Speaker 1: I'm already time to take a part of the survey.
Speaker 1: Please one, okay, I'll take this survey. Were you happy
Speaker 1: with your agents level of service? Press one for yes,
Speaker 1: five or absolutely not? Girl? Who's coming? Four? No? No, no,
Speaker 1: wait too. This is the Asian you're just dealing with.
Speaker 1: I just saw you gave me a very low rating
Speaker 1: on your didn't mean to. It's because they have that
Speaker 1: they haven't set the opposite one being number one the best.
Speaker 1: Just like in any ranking, number one is the best
Speaker 1: and five out of five would be the worst. And
Speaker 1: you chose four, which is towards five. I was this
Speaker 1: kind of paying attention. Come on, you know me, sir,
Speaker 1: you can take it up with a review board. You
Speaker 1: can sort of posed a statement as to why you
Speaker 1: misunderstood the very simple to use rating system. We can
Speaker 1: examine it and see what the council things, you know,
Speaker 1: and i'd like to take it up with the review board. Actually,
Speaker 1: if you don't mind, I'm going to give you one
Speaker 1: number to that. Okay, FBI help, all right. I didn't
Speaker 1: have to write this down. It's not my pro Some
Speaker 1: people can't remember these things. Okay, what was it? Okay? Help, alright,
Speaker 1: go talking to you again. You don't have to say goodbye,
Speaker 1: thank you for calling one hundred flowers. God, damn it,
Speaker 1: you didn't write it down to the way eight hundred
Speaker 1: health PI. Hell yeah, I don't think he wrote it down.
Speaker 1: Because you want flowers? No, you know what, I would
Speaker 1: like to order some flowers because there's an agent that
Speaker 1: I kind of perturbed. I want to order flowers or not? Yes,
Speaker 1: I would like to order flowers. Flowers, you know what.
Speaker 1: I'd like to order two sets of flowers. One is
Speaker 1: an apology set of flowers and the others for a
Speaker 1: King Signia. First one is the ghost too, you know.
Speaker 1: Just make it out to Agent Comma you're gonna want
Speaker 1: to write all this time. I remember it. It's me Thomas,
Speaker 1: thank you for your excellent service, which I meant to
Speaker 1: give a one for period. Will you forgive me question
Speaker 1: mark love? Should I say love? Whatever you want? It's
Speaker 1: your dime, sir? Is this the coneniors apology flowers? Obviously
Speaker 1: some apology flowers? I don't know. Some people like to
Speaker 1: senn apology flowers to consider nearest. Can I'm gonna go
Speaker 1: get a job, but juice? Do you want one? Can
Speaker 1: you get me strawberries? Wild? Small? Good luck with this one?
Speaker 1: He think you? He said he's a work. Will there
Speaker 1: be a survey after this call? Just out of curiosity? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Okay great? The other one they're fifteen year old Nae
Speaker 1: Comma happy at ketson Era love Thomas. Can you get
Speaker 1: one of the XO XO? Actually? Please? If I just
Speaker 1: happy Kinsira love Thomas. Yes, I was just saying that eight.
Speaker 1: He didn't write down the right letters. He sent the
Speaker 1: wrong flowers to the wrong person. Agent Marry, you get
Speaker 1: the kinds of flowers? Oh what why taste good? Hello?
Speaker 1: Agent special agent Berry? Hey Berry, you might have gotten
Speaker 1: a confusing okay, a note recently. I just want to
Speaker 1: kind of clear it up a little bit for you.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, Actually I thought this was a message from
Speaker 1: a Mexican cartel saying that I was going to go
Speaker 1: down like it's very concerned about it. If you get
Speaker 1: a bouquet for a King Sania and you're a male,
Speaker 1: especially the adult male like me, Oh, that's like your
Speaker 1: head on a tortoise. You know what I mean, your
Speaker 1: head out of the tortoise, which is a turtle on
Speaker 1: steroids by the way, something it's a breaking bad reference.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, with the toga. Are you saying you sent
Speaker 1: this to me? I honestly, Berry, full disclosure, I really
Speaker 1: didn't know the key Sania flower boukay thing meant that
Speaker 1: you're going to die. Hey, I didn't mean to do that. Frankly,
Speaker 1: I'm glad they were sent to you because if they
Speaker 1: would have been sent to the phone line started scrambling,
Speaker 1: Thomas gonna get his film message to Barry. Barry started
Speaker 1: piecing it together, realized Thomas must be the head of
Speaker 1: a cartail that Thomas immediately went to his buzzes and
Speaker 1: Pat Thomas is the top five wanted man. Come again
Speaker 1: you be Berry put him as the head of the
Speaker 1: top five. You said Thomas did it. You said that Thomas.
Speaker 1: Let me just get this studies shade. I know what
Speaker 1: I'm doing. I'm I'm the fucking notes of the show.
Speaker 1: All right, I'm a big fan. Thank you. I don't
Speaker 1: even anything since the first episode to one about the
Speaker 1: guy made his own pants. We actually have that episode,
Speaker 1: the first episode of pants episode one. Yeah, I think
Speaker 1: guy made his down pants. Guys, yeah, Robin, coming on,
Speaker 1: even women has to have pants. While you're making a
Speaker 1: pair of pants, and you always have a pair of pants.
Speaker 1: Are you're wearing that? You should say that because I
Speaker 1: have her to me on it. Trely every one of
Speaker 1: these non days, I can make my old pants. You've
Speaker 1: been watching me. At this point, the show had gone
Speaker 1: off the alse he tryed to degree it. Barry got
Speaker 1: behind the board and he started narrating it, and he
Speaker 1: was trying to establish that Okay, he knew that Thomas
Speaker 1: was head of the cartel because of the mistake, but
Speaker 1: the host are he said it wrong the first time,
Speaker 1: and it took a way too long to explain that situation.
Speaker 1: A quick question. We're gonna get to hear me take
Speaker 1: the survey for the flower, I was kind of looking
Speaker 1: forward to anything else. I don't even know how you
Speaker 1: got to this predicament. Thank you so much for using one, Flowers.
Speaker 1: We'd love to have your feedback. If you're highly ecstatically
Speaker 1: appreciative of the attention that your representative gave you, press one,
Speaker 1: two or three. If you're somewhere in the middle where
Speaker 1: you can't quite decide how you feel about it and
Speaker 1: maybe need a little more time, try four or five, six,
Speaker 1: or even seven. If you're vastly disappointed by the experience,
Speaker 1: any number combination might represent this. From eight two, let's
Speaker 1: say a thousand should have written that down at any point.
Speaker 1: If you'd like to leave your response after the tone,
Speaker 1: do so, right, Flowers. Oh yeah, this is Thomas Um,
Speaker 1: I'm leaving a message, he said after the tone. I
Speaker 1: didn't need to tune, so he said to the sound
Speaker 1: of the sounder, and it was I heard it for Flowers. Well,
Speaker 1: I was leaving my review. Cool question, Ari. Will there
Speaker 1: be a survey at the end of the show and
Speaker 1: let you know the experience in general. It'll be letter.
Speaker 1: It comes in the mail bubble dot and then you
Speaker 1: get to put it back the scanchin is there going
Speaker 1: to be a survey about the difficulty of complaining that
Speaker 1: this is Americans live survey? Anyway? Was this the recording?
Speaker 1: The whole time was the survey? We go, Oh, God, Flower,
Speaker 1: how do I flower? Agent? Agent? Agent? Eight hundred flowers.
Speaker 1: I see that you were trying to make a selection
Speaker 1: about your satisfaction and you thought that it was a voicemail. Sir,
Speaker 1: would you like this? Kicked up to my manager. It
Speaker 1: seems like you're very upset. We tried to de escalate
Speaker 1: as quickly as we can. Now you're screaming certain, no, no,
Speaker 1: your voice is very it's upsetting to me. I'm actually
Speaker 1: the volume of my voice is Oh, he's a manager?
Speaker 1: How you can do? Welcome to Flowers? What welcome to?
Speaker 1: What is your flowers? What's your problem? Um? Where to begin? Well,
Speaker 1: we're with you. I've been listening to the whole thing.
Speaker 1: I listen. I listen to everything. I listen to the calls.
Speaker 1: Is my fucking job, bro. Nobody listens to me. That's
Speaker 1: why I concurse all. I want a piece of ship.
Speaker 1: Do you have a manager that I can speak to you?
Speaker 1: I own the company. You're Mr Flowers. My name is
Speaker 1: missed the maripose. But yeah, fancily it is Flowers who
Speaker 1: then tell him I'm your manager, to kick it over
Speaker 1: to me. You talk to my boss. Yeah, I want
Speaker 1: to talking. Yo. You got the zipper here? What the
Speaker 1: Fund's the problem? You got an issue? Yeah, what's the
Speaker 1: problem me? I was going to complain about the zipper?
Speaker 1: What are you doing? Who the fuck is this Thomas? Thomas,
Speaker 1: you fucking stepped away from We were casing that place
Speaker 1: where you don't call you you know how long you've
Speaker 1: been gone, like where the fund you've been? Of course
Speaker 1: we're gonna start a side hustle. Yeah, yeah, what do
Speaker 1: you We've always had decided hustle. We make the most
Speaker 1: of our time if we ever has some downtime. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we're going to tap in to do hr work for
Speaker 1: one hundred Flowers. Yeah, it's one of those you know,
Speaker 1: satellite jobs. Yeah. Who's casing the Gerald Deed's I don't know.
Speaker 1: You're the one in charge of the case. Yeah. You
Speaker 1: brought us here, and I wonder who could do the
Speaker 1: safe thing? And then you just dissippeated and make an
Speaker 1: I said, you guys watched garld D's while I'm gone
Speaker 1: we're still watching. It hasn't left. I gotta make money
Speaker 1: while I'm sitting. You're waiting for you. Yeah, you slow turtle.
Speaker 1: You put your head on from from Yeah, you like that.
Speaker 1: I love that. It's a great reference, such a good
Speaker 1: I love that. Just do it a lot? All right?
Speaker 1: What are we doing? What we do? We don't even
Speaker 1: know why? The fun game me. You're thinking about how
Speaker 1: much time I wasted thinking that I was talking to
Speaker 1: a flower company and deciding flowers when I realized that
Speaker 1: I'm taking surveys. I'm talking to agents. I could have
Speaker 1: just agents agents. What the fund you're talking about? What
Speaker 1: the funk you're talking about? No? No, no agents that
Speaker 1: that work at customer service, not every agent. Oh oh
Speaker 1: you mean, like like what we are? What do you think?
Speaker 1: I have some kind of a rat mice on steroid
Speaker 1: in a rat suit. They think I'm a rat. I repeat,
Speaker 1: they think I'm a rat Berry Berry. If you could
Speaker 1: hear that, I think I'm a rat Berry special Agent, Barry, Yeah,
Speaker 1: Berry Mary. I was saying it into my lapel, and
Speaker 1: I'm saying it in piece. I'm getting feedback. Can you
Speaker 1: turn one of them? Are you calling your shirt? Barry Yeah,
Speaker 1: what's up with that? What the fund is going on? Here? Guys?
Speaker 1: Hang tight one second, rab Yeah, open his shirt and
Speaker 1: give me a ship. Hey, I'll do it like he does.
Speaker 1: And now I'm open in your shirt? What the fund
Speaker 1: is that? What the fund is that? What is it? Tattoo?
Speaker 1: A tattoo of what a y? And it looks like
Speaker 1: a pair of iPods tape to your chest? Yeah, pods?
Speaker 1: I mean it is. Oh, that's a tattoo of that?
Speaker 1: Then how come I can pull it? There's a temporary
Speaker 1: tattoo removable? What I went to my nieces key sing here.
Speaker 1: They had a painting body body body painting everything. Everybody
Speaker 1: tattoos and I had that congratulations to your niece, by
Speaker 1: the way, thank you. I don't know your niece. Yeah right.
Speaker 1: I think you'd be very strange if you knew her niece.
Speaker 1: I know, I felt it very odd that you knew mine.
Speaker 1: And now of a sudden you're like, oh, do you
Speaker 1: hang out with my niece? Were you? I just thought
Speaker 1: maybe nieces hung out with other nieces. Maybe you guys
Speaker 1: would come into contact like a nice club. My eyes,
Speaker 1: he's wearing a wire. I see how you could come
Speaker 1: to the conclusion that because I am wearing something that
Speaker 1: looks exactly like the wires at the FEDS issue to
Speaker 1: their informants, and that I was talking into my temporary tattoo,
Speaker 1: I can see how you would think that I was
Speaker 1: an informant. Give me that wire, Give it to me.
Speaker 1: Who am I talking to? Oh? Hey, wire, very tell
Speaker 1: about it? Can everybody hear me? Yeah? Barry on speaker?
Speaker 1: Did tattoo on speaker? I want to talk to Barry?
Speaker 1: Who are you? I got that part stupid. I'm I'm
Speaker 1: a special agent for chocolate. They're trying to send you
Speaker 1: some chocolates because you've been such a good criminal criminals? Um,
Speaker 1: would you like to take a survey? Agent? Berry added,
Speaker 1: point to his boss in Quantico to tell him what
Speaker 1: happened to poor Thomas who disappeared. Barry, I'm going over
Speaker 1: all of us. It's quite a case. Can you break
Speaker 1: this down in like the simplest, easily consumable, easily listenable
Speaker 1: for both of us in terms? Please? It seems that
Speaker 1: this guy Thomas was a little over his head and
Speaker 1: he was working with criminals, and he didn't work out
Speaker 1: what his story was going to be before he went
Speaker 1: into it. And then you just sort of make snapped
Speaker 1: his decisions and step away, and then he wouldn't think
Speaker 1: of what to say once he came back, and so
Speaker 1: it was almost like a football he's kicking down the
Speaker 1: field trying to pick it up. It's like a quality epilogue.
Speaker 1: So your process is fascinated coming up back to the
Speaker 1: first the word from our esteemed sponsors stay with us
Speaker 1: act to the interview, especially guests contributed by Nusky. How
Speaker 1: are you today? Oh, I'm very good. Thanks for having me.
Speaker 1: I'm I've only been listening to the show. I you know,
Speaker 1: I came to it maybe about halfway through your run.
Speaker 1: You know, I had some people also recommend it to me.
Speaker 1: I always trust sort of word of mouth and um,
Speaker 1: and these people were you know, really sort of tapped
Speaker 1: into a lot of zeitgeists podcasts and then so I
Speaker 1: really felt like that's, uh, that spoke to me. I'm
Speaker 1: doing it for a long time. Yeah, and and for
Speaker 1: me to go back and sort of go find all
Speaker 1: these archives. It's also a time capsule, you know, like
Speaker 1: you're focusing on the first cell phone and you know, yeah,
Speaker 1: and then sort of you know when when small inspection
Speaker 1: stations closed down like these big moments in society that
Speaker 1: the shifts, we actually have that small inspections one. I've
Speaker 1: always been there yet, but we have that in the
Speaker 1: archives that when the small ye such as such as
Speaker 1: a family runs small inspection empire, when that goes down,
Speaker 1: that I mean, it's heartbreaking, it's really heartbreaking. Any it's
Speaker 1: number inspection house, uh, any chain of different small inspections
Speaker 1: across the Houston Metroplex area shut down for really two days.
Speaker 1: People who needed to get their cars inspected and you
Speaker 1: know the status of the smack of their own cars.
Speaker 1: We're just sitting there with their pockets in their hands. Yea.
Speaker 1: We have had this our family for must have been
Speaker 1: three years now have three three years and nine months
Speaker 1: this Tuesday. Yeah, we don't want to Yeah we want
Speaker 1: to say four years, but it's not four years yet.
Speaker 1: But we will be in two months in one week. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but we didn't want to say that it was four
Speaker 1: years because we know you're a journalist and we don't
Speaker 1: want to be any gotcha journalism. If we want, we
Speaker 1: want to be factual for you, and also we want
Speaker 1: to be factual about we're closing down, but not for
Speaker 1: any kind of criminal reasons. We really want to emphasize that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: which are we're gonna divolte to people, Well, you just
Speaker 1: say any closed down, We'll divulge all the reasons why,
Speaker 1: all the reasons that are not reasons why we closed down.
Speaker 1: Like will say, like we did not close down because
Speaker 1: for criminal reason. Yeah, well, we did not close down
Speaker 1: because theft or future arson like if that, if that
Speaker 1: happens in the future. We did not burn it for
Speaker 1: insurance money purposes because it got to be too much
Speaker 1: not having place open very long. We got mouse to feed.
Speaker 1: We did not try to cash in. I burned the
Speaker 1: place down. We do not have a gambling problem that
Speaker 1: is currently up ending our existence. Surely, after the interview,
Speaker 1: all four locations burned in the hell fire and the
Speaker 1: two brothers twin brother smug inspection banished, and the blue
Speaker 1: leading a lot of people with no smug inspection places
Speaker 1: to go to. Yah, I would like to apply for
Speaker 1: a driver's license. Um, I am not trying to get
Speaker 1: a new identity. I'm not playing a law I just
Speaker 1: had to accompany him to the d n V. Sir.
Speaker 1: I can only help one of y'all, So who who
Speaker 1: needs the I d and who does not. I do
Speaker 1: not not need it. Okay, I don't have I do
Speaker 1: not have time for this. And I am I am
Speaker 1: not a word play person. I am not a double entendre.
Speaker 1: If you were trying to post some of that crap,
Speaker 1: you can take it right out of here. Rad now,
Speaker 1: my friends, And that that was a good one. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I kind of is a young me, very much of
Speaker 1: a round over version, and I thought it was really interesting. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and you did the last act on her, yeah, which
Speaker 1: is honestly, I mean that there wasn't much to her.
Speaker 1: She was kind of just a woman who worked at
Speaker 1: the d m V. Yeah. Well negative. So I don't
Speaker 1: want to give you, but I love your work. We do.
Speaker 1: We actually we have that too, by the way of
Speaker 1: the third act of that episode, when you were talking,
Speaker 1: when you followed the the m V woman around. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you guys, I have to play it. You know what.
Speaker 1: I'm serious. What just trying to make you up here?
Speaker 1: I know you're sorry. I'm sorry, ma'am. I'm just trying
Speaker 1: to I know, but I do not. Can I get
Speaker 1: a check one to please in right now? Check one
Speaker 1: to check one to sibilants. Sibilants like in that SNL
Speaker 1: sketch about sound. I know what y'all do. Go ahead, now,
Speaker 1: go ahead, you're you're in my living room now, in
Speaker 1: my my one evening off. I gave you my time,
Speaker 1: so let's do this interview. Yeah, that was a very
Speaker 1: tough interview. Yeah, I don't know why included that stuff.
Speaker 1: I just saying I used to have his stab out
Speaker 1: back in the day when I just did everything that
Speaker 1: I've included, I just put it out there, you know.
Speaker 1: I just really very much about transparency. You've You've really
Speaker 1: grown and it tells about yourself. Oh wow, that's a
Speaker 1: good interview. Question from originally from Charlotte, North Carolina, and uh,
Speaker 1: now I live in Los Angeles. I went to a
Speaker 1: college in Charlotte, in Charlotte for Oh my god, where'd
Speaker 1: you live in Charlotte? Was passing in the night? Yeah,
Speaker 1: the Queen City. You lived in New York when you
Speaker 1: moved here? Yes, I was in uh moved there in
Speaker 1: ninety six, and then I moved out here in two
Speaker 1: thousand and six. But you in New York for ten years?
Speaker 1: Ten years? In math? Did you enjoy your time, dude?
Speaker 1: I I did, and then I got exhausted with it.
Speaker 1: It's an exhausting city. It takes a lot of energy, right,
Speaker 1: And I broke my toe because I kicked the wall
Speaker 1: after my car was broken into for the seventh time,
Speaker 1: and um, subways uh started to make me sad so
Speaker 1: uh And there was no more work there. All the
Speaker 1: work was out. Now what I was gonna say, there's
Speaker 1: no more work in New York? All right? What kind
Speaker 1: of work do you do? I've bet to get there?
Speaker 1: Really seem to take a while. Was that the kind
Speaker 1: of look, Oh, I'm an actor and a writer, mainline actor.
Speaker 1: Have I seen you and stuff? I don't know what
Speaker 1: you watch. I watch all kinds of stuff. I watch
Speaker 1: a lot of old old movies in the nineteen eighties. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean I'm in most of those. Tell us about
Speaker 1: what you've been working on? Now these days I feel
Speaker 1: stop hearing record. Do we have let me step recluding? Okay,
Speaker 1: so when we're in this part, do I sort of
Speaker 1: talk about the reality, like the harsh reality we've all
Speaker 1: been through with a COVID and stuff, or do I
Speaker 1: steer away from that? Well, I would say, like, well,
Speaker 1: the past year and a half, I haven't really been
Speaker 1: doing much I've had my own podcasts and stuff. But
Speaker 1: I got a podcast called bald Talk on. We'll talk
Speaker 1: about that. Yeah, and and then, um, I've been auditioning.
Speaker 1: I did some commercials. I do voices for Bob's Burgers.
Speaker 1: Do that. We'll talk about that. Okay, all right, so
Speaker 1: when we go when when you when you ask the
Speaker 1: question again, are you taking notes? I don't have a pen. Okay, podcast,
Speaker 1: Bob's Buggers. Yeah, auditioning, but you know, trying to generate work.
Speaker 1: I think that's a you know, Okay, do you have
Speaker 1: any podcasts going on? Oh? Sure, I've got a podcast
Speaker 1: called bald Talk. Let's just try that one again. I
Speaker 1: I'd like a clean one and we'll just kind of
Speaker 1: do you want me to be him? Do you want
Speaker 1: me to do you want do you want to run
Speaker 1: the lines with me? Right? Use this audio and then
Speaker 1: we'll use your your thing. Okay, So okay, UM tell
Speaker 1: me about Hey, can you not do it in his voice?
Speaker 1: Because yeah, what is that? What the fund is that
Speaker 1: even you've been doing impetitions to me behind my back,
Speaker 1: that's a that's a new character mark. You know. I
Speaker 1: don't I don't need to. I don't need the question,
Speaker 1: I'll just say, okay, three to one. I have a
Speaker 1: podcast called Bald Talk. It's myself and Charlie Sanders. Uh,
Speaker 1: two bald comedians interview bald everybody. We've had actors, directors, musicians,
Speaker 1: wig makers. We just interviewed them about being bald, and
Speaker 1: then it kind of goes from there into their creative
Speaker 1: work and their insecurities and sort of the idea of
Speaker 1: like vanity and perception and stuff. Are there any things
Speaker 1: that you discovered that you didn't know of other people's
Speaker 1: perspectives on being bald? The big takeaway is that, uh,
Speaker 1: it's always a bigger hang up for you than anybody
Speaker 1: else in the whole world, and especially if you have
Speaker 1: a hang up about dating. Women do not give a
Speaker 1: f They really don't. So take that away. If you're
Speaker 1: if you're listening and you're bald, it's fine, it's totally fine. Well,
Speaker 1: thank you guys. Yeah, you're welcome. You use you want
Speaker 1: to leave. I don't know, it seemed like it was
Speaker 1: just I just eating. You do get very close to
Speaker 1: people's face when you talk to him, I think to
Speaker 1: make sure that they can hear maybe when it comes
Speaker 1: out of my mouth. We have headphones and microphones. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's what the mike's I mean, we're literally on both
Speaker 1: on your mic. You started on the other side of
Speaker 1: the room. You are now over with me because I
Speaker 1: don't want I don't want to throw you know, I
Speaker 1: don't want to mess up we guys have. It's just
Speaker 1: just some if if if you guys were to make
Speaker 1: a survey available to me, I would take it and
Speaker 1: give some feedback. But you know, actually have that survey.
Speaker 1: We have a line phone number. I have to press
Speaker 1: the button. Well, you have to press several buttons because
Speaker 1: you're down the number. What is in It's one, It's
Speaker 1: the one. This is Americans Live Survey. This is Americans Numbers, right,
Speaker 1: it's like way too many. Hold on, Sorry, sorry guys,
Speaker 1: my phone's ringing. Hold on, Thank you for calling. This
Speaker 1: is American's Live Customer Service. This is Andy the producer.
Speaker 1: Can I are you taking the survey for me? I
Speaker 1: feel like I should take today. Would you get away
Speaker 1: from my mic so I can take the survey? Please
Speaker 1: please just for this moment, step away for like a second. Okay,
Speaker 1: thank you? Yeah, Hi, Hi, Brian, Yes, oh, hey, how
Speaker 1: you doing. Hey, you're you're calling the survey line. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I just wanted to give some feedback on the interview section. Okay,
Speaker 1: how's it going so far? Are you enjoying it? I mean, yeah,
Speaker 1: there's some problem. I mean I feel like there's some
Speaker 1: elements to it that I'm not totally psyched about. Like
Speaker 1: he gets a little close and and I felt like
Speaker 1: when you ask opening questions like tell me about yourself? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean what am I supposed to? Well, you know, free? Sorry,
Speaker 1: can you hand just one second, I'm getting another calla alright,
Speaker 1: I've got Brian on the survey. Yeah, I know he's
Speaker 1: saying that. I can see you talking to him. I
Speaker 1: can turn around if it's can you do me? Could
Speaker 1: you do me a favorite? And just turn around real quick? Yeah?
Speaker 1: What's that? Yeah, he's on the phone. He's bitch and
Speaker 1: again about again. This is what he sounds like right now,
Speaker 1: he's sting too close to me. Again. I'm sorry, I'm
Speaker 1: at turn back around. You guys gave me the option,
Speaker 1: Like I just said, is there a survey? And so
Speaker 1: you're letting me do a survey? But now just now
Speaker 1: you're sort of upended. This is this weird? You know,
Speaker 1: if you have a survey about your survey. I would
Speaker 1: I would give some feedback on that. As a matter
Speaker 1: of fact, we're going to end it on this. We
Speaker 1: actually have one. This is American's Live Survey survey. Who's
Speaker 1: calling it? I'll do it. I have a new I
Speaker 1: have a new phone. I want to Yeah, yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: just gonna do a voicing. One eight hundred. This in
Speaker 1: a shift now wrong number one hundred. This is Americans
Speaker 1: Live Survey Survey. I'm sorry, did you mean one eight hundred?
Speaker 1: This is Americans Live Survey, no survey survey. I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: did you mean this is Americans Live Survey? I think
Speaker 1: it might be confusing the phone because we say survey twice.
Speaker 1: Probably I'm gonna I'm gonna hang out making the call.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna call it surday diving it now, Hey guys,
Speaker 1: one second, my phone's ringing. Sure, I'm gonna grab it.
Speaker 1: Thank you for calling the This is Americans Live Survey line.
Speaker 1: This is Andy. How can I help you? How was
Speaker 1: your How was how's it going? Allright? We love it?
Speaker 1: If you just let me start talking at some point,
Speaker 1: Oh okay, I would probably with my producer, Can I
Speaker 1: tell you what it is? He's too great, he's too great,
Speaker 1: it's too funny. He's asking me to play different parts
Speaker 1: of the archives. And you know how many tapes we
Speaker 1: have any archives? Thousands? Right? And then now we've got
Speaker 1: to end on this. I'm sorry, I got I'm getting
Speaker 1: a call. One a second. Hey, Brian, he's on the phone.
Speaker 1: He's on the phone. I really like what he's doing.
Speaker 1: You do it. I don't think he sounds like a Yeah,
Speaker 1: he sounds like a dying librarian or something. Sorry, what
Speaker 1: are you doing here? Oh? I've been here the whole time.
Speaker 1: He's listening to here. Got a bit full of shit.
Speaker 1: I'm really sorry. I'm sorry. I think I I caused
Speaker 1: the problem in this. The problem, just like the thing,
Speaker 1: is that I do my best to movies fits along.
Speaker 1: Sometimes my producer gets a little archive crazy, and then
Speaker 1: we started dipping in the thing, and then all of
Speaker 1: a sudden we have no time for nothing. I really
Speaker 1: like the way that you're tired. I'm gonna called the survey.
Speaker 1: Here we go again. Hold on my phone, right, Hello, Hey,
Speaker 1: it's me. Hey, what's up. Well? Ari is kind of
Speaker 1: being a dick right now to you? I know, okay? Well,
Speaker 1: by zero stars, guys, contributed by Husky. Thank you so
Speaker 1: much for this opportunity. Yeah, coming up at three, but
Speaker 1: first the word from our sponsors who make this high
Speaker 1: quality program possible. Stay with us at three. Well, all
Speaker 1: her friends were positive that Mary had a sixth sense.
Speaker 1: She knew that she had a seventh sense. It was
Speaker 1: a tingling sense kind of helped her see things in
Speaker 1: a different dimension. He was a new kind of psychic.
Speaker 1: You know what, I think you have what I like
Speaker 1: to call a SA And since are you serious? I do?
Speaker 1: I am? I do in serious? You do in seriously?
Speaker 1: See I doing serious? All day long and then the
Speaker 1: rest of the day at the night time. I've had
Speaker 1: so many people say that there's something about me that
Speaker 1: I have an energy that they can really that radiates.
Speaker 1: And my new My mama, My mama had this special ability.
Speaker 1: She knew, she knew and the milk was about to
Speaker 1: go bad. She knew it before it happened. She wouldn't
Speaker 1: even look at the date. She's just say, milk gone bad,
Speaker 1: and sure enough we wouldn't drink it. Wait a second,
Speaker 1: but your mama was the milking bad lady. Yeah, she
Speaker 1: was the milks here she was, She's the milks here.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I didn't know that I was amongst
Speaker 1: the royalties. Stop yah, stop, you're making me blush. I
Speaker 1: wrote my college thesis on your mother. Are you serious?
Speaker 1: Just dead on the milks here? I didn't know that
Speaker 1: her reach is that fas was. Excuse me, it is
Speaker 1: all right, and milks here. I've been seeing the future
Speaker 1: of milk since the early nineties. It was very popular
Speaker 1: N six number. She'd put on commercials that would air
Speaker 1: at late time at night. You feel like your milks
Speaker 1: mak go bad am, Well, let me hold the cart
Speaker 1: and now, sweetheart, you got another week of milk on
Speaker 1: that one. O't thank you so much that I had
Speaker 1: to leave you with this. What if this milk is
Speaker 1: left towards the front of the fridge, away from the
Speaker 1: ventilation that cools it, you're gonna have half a day left,
Speaker 1: and if you want a full week, you gotta put
Speaker 1: it towards the back. If you do not hear my words,
Speaker 1: you'll have six and a half days of milk. She
Speaker 1: wasn't the only one who had a future knowing of
Speaker 1: dairy products. There was also the cheese here. Let's see
Speaker 1: the thing with the cheese. As you what if you
Speaker 1: got Tuesday. Just tell me Tuesday, Tuesday, what Tuesdays want.
Speaker 1: It's gonna go back, so we can't have Tuesday. Yeah,
Speaker 1: after Tuesday youet done with it. And I'm not understanding
Speaker 1: what's so confusing about this. We just bought this cheese,
Speaker 1: just bought it. We just bought this cheese. Was like
Speaker 1: something that you might want to take up with the
Speaker 1: customer service at the grocery store where you bought it,
Speaker 1: because they should probably should not be selling cheese that
Speaker 1: is so close to his expiration date. So so so
Speaker 1: after Tuesday it's done. Yes, after Tuesday has done, is
Speaker 1: there any way to make it? Preserve it? The milk
Speaker 1: lady used to tell us where to put the milk in?
Speaker 1: Where do we put What you want for me? What
Speaker 1: do you want from me? I don't know that cheese.
Speaker 1: That's the date. Eat the cheese, don't eat the cheese.
Speaker 1: What do you want? What do you want? You know what?
Speaker 1: You're expecting a little bit more out of me than
Speaker 1: I'm willing to give to you. He was an accidental medium,
Speaker 1: didn't really want to have his job. He would just
Speaker 1: bring Blacks the cheese to him and he would just
Speaker 1: begredge and eat tell him when it was going to
Speaker 1: go bad. He just always pissed about it. I don't
Speaker 1: know the date on this. Gorgon Sella clearly says in
Speaker 1: two weeks. So what what? What else are you wanting
Speaker 1: me to do? I can read the date, okay. I
Speaker 1: want to know, much like the milk's here, what the
Speaker 1: essence of the cheese? When the essence will pass? I
Speaker 1: don't know. Open it up, smell it what? I don't
Speaker 1: understand how we drove twelve hours for this? He's right,
Speaker 1: smell it. I don't like Goregon till let's start with
Speaker 1: what are we doing? What are we doing with our lives?
Speaker 1: I don't know. Even though you just tell people to
Speaker 1: fuck off, he would just keep coming. I'm not understanding
Speaker 1: what all of you people want. Look at the cheese,
Speaker 1: Smell it. If it smells bad, don't eat it. If
Speaker 1: it's past the date, don't eat it. What is with
Speaker 1: the line of cars turned around? Dude? I can't do
Speaker 1: anything more for you. I'm trying to point together on
Speaker 1: telling tree for my bat and I can't risk it
Speaker 1: and cheese that's going bad. Don't you fucking see? This
Speaker 1: is at about my life by the one with the
Speaker 1: latest date on it blug. And that's why my mom
Speaker 1: is sort of faded from popularity because of the cheese guy.
Speaker 1: He undermined her whole craft and her vision and it
Speaker 1: was just gone. Is there anything? Is there any kind
Speaker 1: of food products that you feel like you have you
Speaker 1: can you can see the future of Is this the
Speaker 1: job interview? I'm so nervous before I was talking to
Speaker 1: a young lady who's doing a doctoral piece of my mama. Now,
Speaker 1: how did I get in this office? I'm from the
Speaker 1: Paranormal Investigations Group, and um, I'm sorry I interrupted an interview.
Speaker 1: It was really rude of me. I apologize. How you
Speaker 1: chloroformed meat real fast? I didn't know how I ended
Speaker 1: up in here? Do you feel like you can see
Speaker 1: the future of other produced by chance? If it'll get
Speaker 1: me out of this creepy room? Yes, I mean, what
Speaker 1: do you want for me? I will go undercover for
Speaker 1: you guys. I do not care. It does not matter.
Speaker 1: I'll where why. I do not give a ship. I
Speaker 1: do not like offices like this. Hi. I'm Barry. I'm
Speaker 1: supervisor for this upcoming case. I'm very excited to work
Speaker 1: with you so you can tell and Lettuce go to
Speaker 1: be Berry. What are you doing? Where are you? I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: this is very confusing. We'll work it out. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: get out. It was the first time Andy the producer
Speaker 1: had produced himself into a only time with the other
Speaker 1: if you can figure the episode out was the last
Speaker 1: we ever saw of him, So producer to Annie and
Speaker 1: our special guest contributed by nisky I am you know? Sorry?
Speaker 1: And this is this is Americans Live during his next time.
Speaker 1: This is Americans Live can be found wherever you get
Speaker 1: your podcasts. Be sure to subscribe, rate and review. You
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Speaker 1: this is Americans Live and on Twitter at Americans Live.