Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning,
Speaker 1: This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's
Speaker 1: tip is to try a collaborative riff. Rather than getting
Speaker 1: stuck with small talk about the weather, try creating something
Speaker 1: with your conversation partner instead. Today's tip comes from behavioral
Speaker 1: scientists Maya Rosignant Milan and Erica Boothby. In a New
Speaker 1: York Times article, they proposed what they call collaborative riffing
Speaker 1: as an alternative to small talk. They write, our aim
Speaker 1: and conversation shouldn't be to mine for surface level commonalities
Speaker 1: or go on a charm offensive. Instead, we should ask
Speaker 1: ourselves what could we create together in this moment. I
Speaker 1: definitely appreciated their portrayal of small talk as usual. You're
Speaker 1: having a root canal next week. I had a root
Speaker 1: canal last week. You're from a small town in Iowa.
Speaker 1: I'm from a small town in Massachusetts. Sometimes these superficial
Speaker 1: similarities do pave the way for real connection, but more
Speaker 1: often they remain an uninteresting game of ping pong, with
Speaker 1: the ball going back and forth and getting nowhere. In particular,
Speaker 1: that is where collaborative rifts come in. The authors explain
Speaker 1: when riffing speakers resist the urge to counter every observation
Speaker 1: with their own example, instead building bridges to new ideas
Speaker 1: like that reminds me of or tossing in a Can
Speaker 1: you imagine if they refer to earlier parts of the
Speaker 1: conversation to create inside jokes. Collaborative riffing is more playful
Speaker 1: than typical conversation and can be more fun and creative.
Speaker 1: You could see how this would play out. For instance,
Speaker 1: if a friend from work mentions she watched K Pop
Speaker 1: Demon Hunters over the weekend and you watched Inside Out too,
Speaker 1: you could suggest lightly that it sounds like you have
Speaker 1: the beginnings of a list of kid movies that parents
Speaker 1: actually like. Your colleague might then accept your subtle invitation
Speaker 1: to suggest another movie to go on the list, and
Speaker 1: then you could build from there. That is a collaborative riff. Maybe,
Speaker 1: after listening to a splendid Table podcast episode about all
Speaker 1: the things you can do with instant ramen, you make
Speaker 1: yourself ramen for lunch with shredded carrots and leftover chicken.
Speaker 1: Then on a zoom work meeting right after lunch, in
Speaker 1: the pre meeting chit chat time, you could mention the
Speaker 1: podcast in what you just ate. If your colleagues seemed
Speaker 1: to find Ramen lunch appealing, you could all then brainstorm
Speaker 1: together other ingredients to use with Ramen. Instead of the
Speaker 1: usual three minutes of boring chit chat. You all rift
Speaker 1: together on interesting lunch ideas. You just might get your
Speaker 1: creative juices flowing for the meeting. You discover what foods
Speaker 1: your colleagues like in case you want to invite them
Speaker 1: to lunch in the future, and you may even get
Speaker 1: ideas for future Ramen lunches. Creating something together, whether serious
Speaker 1: or playful, is a lot more fun than talking about
Speaker 1: the weather or shallow similarities, so consider giving it a
Speaker 1: try and you might enjoy small talk a lot more.
Speaker 1: In the meantime. This is Laura. Thanks for listening, and
Speaker 1: here's to making the most of our time. Thanks for
Speaker 1: listening to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback,
Speaker 1: you can reach me at Laura at Laura vandercam dot com.
Speaker 1: Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts
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Speaker 1: wherever you listen to your favorite shows.