WEBVTT - Play the whole movie

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning,

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<v Speaker 1>This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's

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<v Speaker 1>tip is to keep any given experience in context. Play

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<v Speaker 1>the whole movie, don't obsess over one disappointing scene. Today's

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<v Speaker 1>tip comes from Mira Orndoff, a senior manager at Capital One.

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<v Speaker 1>In a recent episode of the Harvard Business Review podcast

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<v Speaker 1>Women at Work, Ornduff described her advocacy for part time

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<v Speaker 1>tech jobs at Capital One and how she handled resistance.

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<v Speaker 1>She commented that she tries to play my whole movie.

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<v Speaker 1>Our brains are so negatively biased, and we have a

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<v Speaker 1>recency bias, and it's so easy to let our brains

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<v Speaker 1>replay things that haven't gone how we wanted. And with

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<v Speaker 1>the ups and downs of the journey, I have really

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<v Speaker 1>found it to be helpful to think about the importance

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<v Speaker 1>of the destination that I'm driving to the progress that

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<v Speaker 1>has happened, and I should find satisfaction in that and

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<v Speaker 1>not in just those individual moments or milestones. Play the

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<v Speaker 1>whole movie. That is such great advice. When we are

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<v Speaker 1>working hard to go in one direction or achieve a

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<v Speaker 1>goal personally or professionally, it is so tempting to focus

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<v Speaker 1>on any given disappointment. And yes, setbacks can be disappointing,

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<v Speaker 1>but a narrow focus means we can overlook the progress

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<v Speaker 1>that has happened too. So, for instance, maybe you feel

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<v Speaker 1>like you performed poorly in a job interview. That is

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<v Speaker 1>definitely frustrating, but you can try to point out to

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<v Speaker 1>yourself that you were offered that second round interview in

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<v Speaker 1>the first place, and you aced the first round interview

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<v Speaker 1>at the company last week. Plus you've got two more

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<v Speaker 1>interviews elsewhere scheduled next week. Play the whole movie about

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<v Speaker 1>your job search. You want to put the disappointing scene

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<v Speaker 1>in context. This is particularly true when it comes to

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<v Speaker 1>big personal goals that take a lot of time. I

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<v Speaker 1>love distance running, but I know that stuff can go

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<v Speaker 1>wrong in big races. Big races can get canceled. You

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<v Speaker 1>can get injured half way through a marathon and have

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<v Speaker 1>to stop after months of training. That can feel devastating.

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<v Speaker 1>In those moments, it helps to remember that maybe a

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<v Speaker 1>year ago you were just starting a couch to five

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<v Speaker 1>k program and now you've run most of a marathon.

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<v Speaker 1>Or maybe you used to run twelve minute miles and

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<v Speaker 1>now your regular easy runs feel good at an eleven

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<v Speaker 1>minute mile pace. All of that sounds like growth to me.

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<v Speaker 1>You can also play the whole movie when you are

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<v Speaker 1>experiencing frustration in a relationship. Don't get stuck on the

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<v Speaker 1>latest scene when your friend canceled on you last minute

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<v Speaker 1>after you'd gone to a lot of trouble to make

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<v Speaker 1>the plans work. By playing the whole movie, you will

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<v Speaker 1>also remember the time when she dropped everything to come

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<v Speaker 1>to the hospital to be with you when your dad

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<v Speaker 1>had a heart attack. That doesn't mean excusing a long

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<v Speaker 1>string of problematic behavior. People do change, and not always

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<v Speaker 1>for the better, but in the context of a long relationship,

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<v Speaker 1>one dud of a scene may just not be that

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<v Speaker 1>big of a deal. When we play the whole movie,

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<v Speaker 1>we maintain a sense of perspective. Sure we may feel sad,

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<v Speaker 1>but we don't let that overshadow everything else. The plot

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<v Speaker 1>is still good. We just need to brush off that

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<v Speaker 1>scene and keep watching. In the meantime, This is Laura.

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<v Speaker 1>Thanks for listening, and here's to making the most of

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<v Speaker 1>our time. Thanks for listening to before Breakfast. If you've

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<v Speaker 1>got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach me at

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<v Speaker 1>Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast is a

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<v Speaker 1>production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts from iHeartMedia, please visit

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<v Speaker 1>the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to

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<v Speaker 1>your favorite shows.